First get rid of your addictions THEN get married ! Do not ruin someone else life please. Also, *emotional* intimacy is more important than physical! Assalam aleykum
And then again, if u look at the bigger picture sister.... porn is what caused the addiction and that brings destruction. Marriage is solution for many and 1 must be mentally sane and a good heart to do so which has become uncommon over the age.
@@knucklehead4787 if you think marriage will solve that filthy addiction, think again. TONS of husbands are addicted because they came into marriage with that disgusting habit. Tons of sisters are deeply deeply devastated by finding out (bc p*rn twists how men view intimacy, they are never satisfied and it also creates many medical issues). May Allah protect me and ALL the virtuous sisters from crossing path with such men, ameen. We don't want that near us. The solution is TAQWA, self control. Getting rid of ALL the triggers (being alone, using the phone at night), fasting, blocking websites etc etc.
Sorry bro, you can't generalize. I'm 36, male, living in the west, having normal natural desire, plenty of options for marriage, but not married. Because I just don't want. No, I dont do zinna nor I'm addicted to p**n nor do filthy things. On contrary, my iman and my life does much better than when I was married more then 10 years ago. You cant reduce marriage just to the bed room. Marriage is more then that. It can take more from you than it can give you, esspecially for men. Everyone should decide for himself/herself if that is good for him/her. Also, it is wrong that marriage will solve your addiction. If you are addicted to anything, you have to get rid of that before involving other people in your life. You have to discipline yourself. This is what we need to teach our youngsters.
@@yaseen99 I disagree, esspecially on this topic. To say that if you are over 30 and not married then you must be doing zina or something filthy is just wrong. Basically you are putting an etiquette on millions of piuos muslims over 30 who are not married. If you put out such claim, then you have to provide at least some data and evidence. This binary, true-false, black-white thinking and simplifying complex topics by some scholars and students of knowledge has caused this ummah a lot of trouble through out the history.
@@memo6782 asalamu alaykum, Grow up then you will understand marriage isn't just any old play about in the park. I don't blame your thoughts, but when you grow up you will realise how ignorant you were when you made this comment.
There are always exceptions to the rule. But this is a serious issue, already tackled by many people of knowledge. Saying otherwise is simply ignorsnt. And your own situation is not the yardstick of what society has come to.
Asalaamulaikum may Allah reward you for your insight The only way we understand things as human beings is based upon generalisations not exceptions. This is why the rulings in the Sharia are mainly based upon the (Ghalib) meaning that which is general. The Fuqhaha dealt with the general nature and habits of men. The Ustadh mentioned the hadeeth "O youth whoever amongst you that has the ability to marry then do so...." This is because it is a general problem that youth face not all. You brought a nice point that we should attempt to rectify ourselves before marriage; however for many marriage can be that rectification. Jazakallah kheirun for the your comment and may Allah bless us all in our endeavours.
The issue many youth face is that even when they do become keen and interested to marry, they face rejection from society. Everyone will say you're too young, you're only 19,20, etc. you're not ready yet you have to finish college first. So to even approach anyone is hard because you'll just have the door closed in your face right away. So then many youth are stuck wondering what they could possibly do because it's hard to find anyone at their age
Everything the brother Abu Taymiyah is talking is real.. It’s a addiction, and a bad addiction along with wasting time. Allah swears by time because of it’s importance , and Allah forbids of to swear by anything of his creation other then him… Everything he’s saying is real and I’ve learned the hard way..
May Allah reward you both for the intention behind this discussion but quite frankly some generalisations have been made. One can’t automatically assume that an unmarried man over the age of 30 must be doing something haram. There can be several other reasons. Why do we let our minds project to the worst possibilities ? In fact, marriage has different rulings(fard all the way to haram ) depending on your circumstance. If ones addicted to porn before marriage , they probably will be after. I don’t buy the notion that once you’re married everything’s gonna be hunkey dorey.Let’s face it - a vast proportion of 17yr old youth today are no way near as mentally & spiritually mature as 17yr olds centuries back. It’s not just about being sexually mature , the detriment to a future spouse from a lack of mental and spiritual maturity can be significant. This is a lifelong commitment. We need to be balanced people. Yes getting married early is a good thing but doesn’t mean we discount financial factors , understanding the correct framework needed for a successful marriage. Allahuma barik
Very true about the level of maturity of 17 year olds nowadays. My personal opinion is to prevent them from falling into sin we should encourage them to get married as early as possible. Once the responsibility of married life hits them they will be forced to mature. And if it does not work out, Allah has made divorce permissible for us. It should be the last resort but a divorce is better than zina imo.
Here's a dua to help you get married In Sha Allah “Our Lord! Grant unto us spouses and offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous. (Rabbana hab lana min azwajina wa dhurriyatina qurrata a`yunin wa’j`alna li’l muttaqina imama)” [Qur’an, 25:74] رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَاماً
@@anoniem012 The beautiful and truthful religion of Allah. Ask Allah to show you better yet. Ask Him for beneficial knowledge. Also read Tasfir Ibn Khathir May Allah be pleased with him. Surah Baqarah.
Here's a dua to help you get married In Sha Allah “Our Lord! Grant unto us spouses and offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous. (Rabbana hab lana min azwajina wa dhurriyatina qurrata a`yunin wa’j`alna li’l muttaqina imama)” [Qur’an, 25:74] رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَاماً
