Decluttering Challenges: How to Let Go of Expensive Things 

That's wonderful! I'm glad the video helped! If you aren't interested in or don't have time to try to sell them (I totally understand, I rarely sell anything), you can always donate them to a women's shelter or a charity shop whose profits go to causes align with your values. As others have pointed out in the comments, sometimes knowing they're going towards a good cause can make it easier to let them go.

That’s a really nice idea. I’ll look into that!

I also just let go to a foster charity...a whole bag (60) Ty bears that I had carted around both Canada and the U.S. for years. Wanted to make cute little candy gift baskets with them. Funny how it feels no different now that they're gone!

The accountant in me loves talking about it.

Oh man, I can imagine! That must have felt great!

That's potentially a good idea for some things, though, to be honest, I fall more in the camp of "If I haven't used it for a long time and forgot I had it, why allow myself to fall back in love with it," but I've probably done that myself too at some point without realizing it. If it helps to solidify the decision, and especially if it helps to prevent future mistakes (e.g. "Did I like that lotion? I can't remember, so I'll buy it again."), then it could be very handy!

That's wonderful!! I'm so glad you read it!! I found the author to be a bit too self-deprecating at times, but the advice was still good, and I find it useful to scan the list of his tips at the end every so often as a refresher. You are 100% right about experiences being far more valuable than material possessions. They don't even compare.

Absolutely! I am a big advocate for finding causes where your donated items will have the biggest impact. It can take slightly more research, but it's worth it in the end. For high-ticket items (handbags, accessories), there may also be charity auctions for local schools or non-profits that can accept the items as well. Someone else gets to buy and enjoy the item, the non-profit gets some much needed cash, and you get to know your contribution went to something worthwhile!

There is no such thing as TMI on this channel! Sorry you're going through a divorce, but it sounds like you're (hopefully) doing ok and are ready for the next chapter. Obviously I love the 30 day minimalism game. Do it. It will give you a whole new perspective. And, of course, if you use the expensive bags and clothes, by all means keep them, but, if you aren't... you know what to do. I've seen so many people on youtube post handbag collection videos featuring some super dated but expensive bags that they never seem to let go of, probably because they cost a fortune to begin with.

Thanks! Deep down, our reasoning is usually pretty simple, but we're good at burying it and layering on the complexity.

Yaaaasssssss! Goodbye, jeans!

You're completely right! Anything we buy deprecates dramatically the second we walk out of the store, and, of course they typically only continue to deprecate with time. I thought about talking about deprecation in this video, but it was already sort of long, so I cut it out. And, if we kept only the things we actually use, we could live in much smaller spaces, which means smaller houses, which are less expensive. There have been heat map studies done that show how little of our houses we actually use, so, if we weren't paying for all of that space to house things we don't use, we'd save a lot of money!

That's a great idea!

That's great! That's my personal philosophy anyway, as it frees up my space the quickest. I remember your comments from what feels like a long time ago, so it sounds like you're making tons of progress! Congrats!

Goodbye, Mr. Crockpot! Someone else will love to snatch that up at a thrift store!

Absolutely! The money you spent then becomes not a loss but a gift to someone else!

Thanks! That's great! Hold on to that momentum, and, when you get home, it can seriously change your life.

Glad you found it useful!

That's so great to hear! Best of luck in your decluttering! I know some items can be harder than others, but it really does get easier to make these decisions with time.

The original money is gone, but there's nothing wrong with selling it to help take the sting out of the loss and give yourself a little assurance that it's going to a good home (i.e. someone who is willing to pay for it is likely to appreciate it)... just make sure you actually do it. If you decide to sell it, I recommend giving yourself a deadline. If you reach that deadline and you haven't gotten around to posting it or it hasn't sold, then find another way to get rid of it. Best of luck! (Also, not trying to talk you back into selling it, just throwing out an idea.)

That's awesome! Best of luck!

I'm the same way: I think about almost all purchases for a long time, so I'm much more likely to change my mind or talk myself out of it than to actually purchase SUPER high ticket items. Hopefully your husband can take some of these tips to heart!

I'm in exactly the same camp! I mean, I made up that example price, but I bought a $40 off craigslist a long time ago and I used it for a few weeks, but it was such a nightmare to clean that it, well, ended up in the pantry. We kept the Vitamix for the same reasons as you--it's easy to clean AND you keep all the fiber from whatever you blend!

Ugh, uncomfortable (physically or otherwise) clothing is the worst! I don't actually advocate dressing for other people, but, if you want to, you could always ask your husband what in particular he likes about the sweater, and then look for those qualities in other garments that you actually feel good in.

Thanks! You too!

Oh absolutely! Paring down before a move is definitely the way to go. Best of luck!

Vested Interests Thank you!

Oh man, I remember the leather jacket I owned when I was a teenager. It was so soft and smooth and I loved it, but you're totally right--leather (and denim, in my opinion) jackets aren't warm at all!

I'm glad they're useful to you! Best of luck on your journey!

There are certainly many areas where frugality and collecting and minimalism intersect and cause friction, so I can't address all of it here, but you're right, it's an interesting topic. 1) Regarding someone acquiring something you paid a lot of money for at a thrift store for "free": Well, it's not actually free, but, more importantly, if you have useful items to donate, it's worth doing a bit of research to find a place where that donation can do the most good. Schools, retirement homes, animal shelters, and (human) shelters can be great options, and, when we donate to these places, it can take some of the sting out of the loss of money because the item will be put to further use by people who really need it. 2) Re: the "super rare": Rare doesn't necessarily correlate to monetary value. Things only have monetary value if someone is willing to buy them; just because supply is low doesn't imply that there is necessarily demand, so if you're keeping rare items because you believe them to have re-sell value, it may not be true. (Side note: helium is one of the rarest elements on earth, and we fill birthday balloons with it.) Another thing to consider is that we don't need to own things in order to show that we appreciate them. In the book "Goodbye, Things," the author notes that we don't need to be collectors, our homes aren't museums, and we can appreciate things out in the world without needing to possess them. Finally, some of your issue seems like it could be sentimental. If you haven't seen my video on decluttering sentimental items, it might be worth checking out: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-iD3D80lf9CM.html I hope some of that helps!

Vested Interests Since watching your video I have made a list of items that I feel I ‘cannot but want to’ get rid of. This has helped me get it out of my brain and think that ultimately I WILL get rid of these items. I get so annoyed with myself as I have donated and sold SO much yet I feel I ‘must’ sell these things. It’s madness

Making a list is a great way to externalize those ideas and get you one step closer to meeting your goals, so that's wonderful! And there's nothing wrong with wanting to sell things and get back some of the money you paid for them, so don't be so hard on yourself! One final thing I want to throw out there: If you're worried about getting rid of something, pretend for a moment that you do get rid of it, and then follow that train of thought to its worst possible scenario. If any of those "worst case scenarios" were to occur, would your life be meaningfully impacted? Are those scenarios more or less stressful than what you're feeling now?

I never used the dutch oven! Well, technically I think we used it once or twice, but it was so heavy that it was difficult to clean, so we tucked it away in the cabinet and never looked at it again. Re: the current value of your items: I 100% understand the desire to recoup some of the money that you originally spent, but this can be difficult as items tend to depreciate in value rapidly. You can try to search for the item online to give you a sense of the price you might be able to re-sell it for. If, however, you're now in a country where the clothing brand is unknown, it might be difficult to sell them because that brand doesn't hold sway in your new location. Value is extremely perceptual and definitely relative. My recommendation: if you can easily recoup some of the cost, great, but if you can't sell the items in a reasonable amount of time, they're just costing you more time and stress.

I have a recent video where I talk about why I gravitate towards classic, basic pieces, which might be interesting to you: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-Lcdzglzq0Pw.html One of the many reasons I love them is that they're tasteful without being flashy. You get to look good without drawing too much attention to your clothing, a benefit of which is that people are far less likely to notice if you wear the same thing over and over again. Some very fashionable people have even adopted personal uniforms--Karl Lagerfeld and Michael Kors come to mind--and I bet no one gives them grief about it. And if people do notice that you wear the same items with more frequency, what of it? I struggle to think of something that someone could say or do to me to change the way I dress, and I have a youtube channel about clothes; I get rude comments from strangers online all the time! (But never once in real life. In real life, I'm often complimented for how I dress.) Finally, if you think people will be concerned if you wear the same items, stop for a moment and try to remember what the people you interacted with today were wearing. I just got home from work, and I can only remember one person's outfit, and she was wearing a bright, printed dress with neon shoes so it was particularly memorable. Everyone else? I couldn't tell you. Anyway, I'll stop babbling. If you don't like to think about clothing, a small or uniform wardrobe might be a great fit for you, and you can free up your mental energy to put towards the things you actually do care about!

I have notes to myself to eventually make videos on a few of the topics that you mentioned, i.e. minimalism and food and living with non-minimalists. To perhaps more directly address what I've done "after" and the point of it for me: 1) I have a video on my minimalism goals and what I want it to help me achieve in my home, which has implications for my entire life (ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-FmcoA0vPgo4.html); 2) The overall goal for me has been to remove clutter so I have more time for the important things in life, and I have noticed recently (after my last 30 day minimalism game) that I am more focused at work, I spend more time with my husband, and both he and I have started making plans to do the things that are important to us (travel, saving, career goals). Goals are always personal, so mine may look different than yours, but minimalism can definitely give anyone more focus to achieve them.

Thanks! Glad you liked it, from the US!

Ha! I was going to suggest roughly the same things! 1) The 20/20 rule! If you can acquire it within 20 minutes of your house for less than 20 dollars, get rid rid of it and buy it again if you find that you need it again. As NecroSSanity said, you may find that you don't actually need those things again in the future, or you may be able to use other items (like the steam setting on an iron) that can do the job just as well. 2) You can often and pretty easily find things like steamers and roasters on craigslist, so if you know you'll need to steam your curtains or cook for Thanksgiving, you can find one locally and re-post or donate it back as soon as you're done using it.

Thank you all for your thoughtful replies. I think I’m going to put my items in “purgatory” for a period of time (out of sight) and decide if I really need them after all. If I don’t use them or can find alternatives than I will donate them. I have done this before with great luck, but these few items (those I mentioned here a few others, have been hold outs because of the reasons I mentioned.). I’m hoping during this time, I’ll find substitute items so I can let them go. I’ve come so far on my minimalism journey, I only have a few of these hold out type products.

Great idea! If you can prove to yourself that you can make do without them (while still having them on hand as backup), it will be a lot easier to let them go. Best of luck, and congrats on all the progress you've made!

Yay! Congrats and best of luck with the move!

I actually have a video on sentimental items! Hope it helps! ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-iD3D80lf9CM.html

Margaret Montemagno *minimalist learner alert* if they are valuable can you donate it to a local museum? Perhaps they can put the items on display for an exhibit? Tax write off!! Woot!

When I was finally ready to let go of a huge sentimental antique doll house and knew no one in the family wanted it I went to the trouble of selling it to the right person. It wasn't about the money, it was a lot more than that. It was worth the hastle to know that it ended up with a woman who collects doll houses and loves them dearly. Now when I think of it I am at peace with letting go.

Your loved ones didn’t buy those things with the idea that someday their descendants would inherit them. They bought them for utilitarian reasons. Would you like it if your future grandkids kept things out of obligation and felt unease and maybe some resentment for having to keep things they don’t really need, use or like? I’m sure your parents and grandparents would urge you to pass the stuff along already, because it’s just stuff. Your memories are in your heart and keeping the material things around or not does not make you love them any more or less.

Thanks! I don't have a PhD, but I do have a master's, though it's not in psychology. I just listen to a lot of NPR!

@@VestedInterestsnice! NPR for the win 💪 I have a bachelor's in cognitive science so a lot of the material here made my ears perk up

Good for you! I definitely think asking if it's something needed or something I want to take into my future can really help to let things go.

Thank you!

Welcome! I'm glad you liked it!

I've actually recently taken up budgeting, but I haven't decided how I want to talk about it in a video. I'll keep thinking about it though! Matt D'Avila's videos are what inspired me to start budgeting, so, if you haven't already seen them, check them out!

Hey, stranger! Hope you're well! New York was great. Got to spend some time with new friends and catch up with old ones, and I loved being back in a place with good public transportation. The backpack performed beautifully--I'm learning to forgive it for being synthetic--and I think I packed the perfect amount of clothing for the six days I was away from home. I ended up hand washing some things in the hotel bathtub (totally free and very easy), which I think served as a good test run to prove to myself that I can do the same thing on my upcoming UK trip. Giving expensive things away, to family, friends, or charities definitely takes the sting out of it. Then the whole expense transforms from a loss into a gift or a donation. Did the wine corks survive the kitchen clear out? I know you love them, so I can see how something like this may not be appropriate if you don't want to potentially damage them, but I just thought of something like this that could be cool: makezine.com/projects/wine-cork-board/

The corks did survive...:) So did the bottlecaps. Although I looked at a bag of those the other day and thought...what if? ;) I am well, thanks. Hope things are good with you and yours. Glad New York and the backpack worked out. My son went to Florida a couple weeks ago with friends, took only backpack, and they were equal parts shocked and amazed he would go for a week with just a single backpack.

And the cork projects look really interesting. We are actually in need of trivets in the kitchen. I may have to haul out the hot glue gun and see what I can come up with.

Oh man, in this heat, he probably only needed a bathing suit and bug spray!

There's only so much we can suggest for our friends. Minimalism isn't for everyone, and, even though certain concepts about possessions seem so clear to many of us, that doesn't mean the rest of the world understands those things. Another way to consider this problem is to think about it from your position: why are you so invested in your friend getting rid of these things? Is this a "live and let live" moment, or does your friend really have a problem that is impacting their life in some meaningful way?

@@VestedInterests Very good points and you're absolutely right. I can see this differently! ❤️

Of course! I hope it helps!

Thanks! I hope it helps!

Thanks! Hope it helps!

That's great! And you're totally right. I had a clock that I tried to sell online for several months, and, like you, there were no biters. It went to a charity shop where I hope someone picked it up at a bargain. Things are only worth money if there is someone willing to pay for them!

You are rebuying everything in there over and over by paying a storage fee. Lesson: never, ever rent storage for “overflow”. Storage should always be very temporary or not at all. :)))

There's "I just returned from a 3 week vacation and I now can't find my Pandora bracelet" lost and then there's "I wore this yesterday, it has to be somewhere in my house" lost. If it's likely somewhere in your house, it can't just grow legs and walk away, so you'll find it eventually if you declutter your home and have fewer crannies in which little things can hide. Good luck finding your bracelet! I hope you do.

Of course! Hope it helps!

Thanks, and nope! I just listen to a lot of NPR.

Thanks! As I mentioned in another comment, these insights are totally the result of me listening to a lot of NPR on my commute.

Oh man, I understand. Fine jewelry can be especially tough, since it seems like it shouldn't depreciate (it's like wearing money, right?) but it manages to still do so as soon as you walk out of the store. Fortunately, you can usually get at least some of your money back.

In some of my other videos, I share that I personally don't sell items often because my priority is to get them out of my house as quickly as possible. If it helps to soften the blow though, go for it! My only caution is that you give yourself a deadline, and, if the deadline passes and you haven't sold or even posted the item, find another way to let it go.

Aww, thanks!

Welp, you know what to do!

Ha! To be fair, I made that example up. When I bought a juicer ages ago, I got mine for $40 off craigslist. I got rid of it in a 30 day minimalism game video a little while back. The guy who was painting my bathroom took it, and he said his wife loved it, so I'm glad it found a new home!

Vested Interests that's great, I love giving stuff away to people who can appreciate/use the item more than I can. Really informative video, keep up the good work 💚♻️🌍

Oh wow, that's awesome! The trip sounds better than the fragrance!