dodie - Before The Line (Official Lyric Video) 

I love how she's in the drivers seat for this one...end of the album, older than before, maybe missing the simpler days of sitting in the backseat

imo the fire mentioned in her lyrics is a metaphor for trauma and the smoke in her video is a metaphor for dissociative states. would make so much sense since fire causes smoke and trauma causes dissociation

When: "I'll take what I can get" Before the Line: "I'll have to take what I can get" In When it sounds like she is saying this defiantly. Reassuring herself that 'this sucks, but I'll make a plan.' But in this song, it seems the reality hits, and it hurts to accept that you're not in control of 'what you can get.' Ouch.

"When a big negative event like that hits the timeline of your life, it wedges itself into your timeline and splits it into two - from that point onwards you think of your life as before it happened and after it happened.” - Carrie Hope Fletcher

I don’t I have ever heard lyrics so real and raw and relatable

From watching all the lyric videos in order here’s my interpretation: 1. Dodie is ready for a night out and is really excited (Air So Sweet) 2. She picks up the guy she was with and then realises he isn’t good for her so she dumps him (Hate myself) 3. On that night out she kisses someone else and feels really guilty about it (I kissed Someone It wasn’t You) 4. Dodie starts trying to figure out who she is after the break up, trying to people please (cool girl) but it doesn’t make her happy. 5. She tries to be a rebellious special girl but then realises who she is in the next song 6. Dodie begins to embrace being a rainbow (love this song it’s so beautiful) on her car ride to the beach 7. She picks up the suit at this beach and it feels like something bad is about to happen. She drives off to meet the person in the next song (?) 8. Dodie gets drunk and messes around with someone who is in a relationship, they make her dress up in the suit to symbolise her acting like someone she isn’t. It makes her question who she is. (Four tequilas down) 9. She tries to wear something that makes her feel like herself again but it doesn’t quite fit because she doesn’t know who she is anymore and thinks this has changed her as a person. (.) 10. Dodie realised she has ruined the person’s relationship and the guilt consumes her. (Sorry) 11. In her sadness and guilt she starts thinking about her own life (When) 12. Dodie is thinking about who she used to be and how she has changed, partly because of the events that transpired during the album. She is angry with herself and the world. (Before the line) Also I’d love to hear this song in a musical it’s amazing. Dodie really made a story in this album and it’s so beautiful ❤️ I’d love to hear what other people’s interpretations are 😊

a lot of people are talking about how the line "once I saw fire" is talking about trauma, but while I can see that, I initially saw it as passion. Once I saw a fire, a passion for being alive, but now I've lost that desire to be alive, that spark of happiness. Also, it might just be me, but the mv seems like she's closed up in a garage, with the exhaust on her car clogged, trying to, ya know, off herself. hence the lines "I think this is really it," "have i already died?" I might just be thinking too dark, idk. also im not 100% sure what the terminology is for that, so I hope you could understand what I was trying to say

It might just be me but to me the percussion at 3:15 sounds like knocking on the door and could be paralleling “you opened a door that a kid shouldn’t walk through” in guiltless?

This song kills me every time, especially the bridge. It’s just so raw and painful, and it’s so dark and full of bitterness/anger/longing/fear. This is easily my favorite from the album. Also, I just noticed that this song ends on the same exact note Air So Sweet starts with. I sort of wonder if that's supposed to mean anything - maybe that despite everything (all of the darkness and pain) we still find hope and reasons to keep living? Or maybe it's just a way to loop the main album lol

That moment when you are trying to have a serious conversation and your friend won't stop vaping

You are all amazing for the whole album. I marvel at you all

"I made a promise but I break it every day. It's not my fault for I was promised just the same. "

ow ow ow *furiously saves to crying playlist

This entire song feels like it was written for me. I first realized something was wrong when the stars no longer made me feel anything. They “didn’t look right.” And I’ve made so many promises to myself -past, present, and future- but I break them. The line “did I let it go?” makes me think about blaming yourself for trauma and mental illness. Did I let go of the good things? Is it my fault? “When can I come home?” “I’m still clawing for the strings.” When do you let go of trying to go back to what you once had?

I'm too emotional right now to type out an articulate compliment, this is so heartbreaking and I'm just-

This speaks so much to me about my struggles with dissociation and depersonalisation. Thank you Dodie... This is what it's like. All you feel is that something is missing, but you can't ever reach it, because you can't remember what it was and if it was ever really there. I see that fog every day. Stay strong all, Win Xx

2:03 reminds me of dissociation - I know she deals with a version of it and I just felt so connected to those lyrics - you’d do anything to come back - and you take what you can get

The bit where it says ‘I think this really is it’ breaks me, it’s so raw and relatable. Full of fear that maybe this is just how you are going to live now. Dodie is truly the best lyricist I know xx

i can't get over this ARTTTT AHHHHH the different moods, feelings, experiences we're seeing in each car vid..... well freakin done lads. dog bless.

The spacey distortion on the vocal at 2:21 is brilliant

I think these are the most visceral visuals so far they go so well with the music and lyrics my gosh

she’s getting out of the car, ending the journey, quite literally crossing the line and leaving it all behind because she has to let it go and it’s the end of the album. amazing raaaAAAH i LOVE SYMBOLISM

This song and 'When' are absolutely speaking to me.

okay this is dodie's magnum opus

For me, this encapsulates SO FUCKING WELL the feeling of being so disconnected from yourself and reality and just being tired of it. The anger that comes when you feel trapped in your head and u just want to scream but it’s all Smokey and blurry and in the end u just give up and surrender to all the shit

I think this might be my favourite from the album 😌

God the emotion in this is so heavy, i cant

the fog machine like the haze over ones mind caused by ddd is EVERYTHING

This is perfection. The combination of hopelessness, feelings of detachment, frustration, anger, desperation, and despair are just... so well portrayed. I love how every line that's repeated has a completely different emotion behind it. Its just gorgeous.

I think this might be my favourite song on the album 🥺 It's the perfect mix of melancholy and acceptance, and it hurts, but in a very cathartic way...

wow holy shit. this is so impactful. I found the smoke in the car so stressful too as it reminded me of how people can connect the exhaust to flow into the car if they want to suffocate. So glad she got out at the end.

1:56 this is what made me cry 'when can i come home' after hearing dodie talk about her attachment to her childhood home along with her depersonalisation, especially with this song being after when, it really hurts

When & Before the line are both really amazing songs surrounding her depersonalization She says: "I am lying when I say it's time to let her float away" In 'When' she accepts that she has to 'let her float away' and tells herself she'll never be 16 again. She has talked about making peace with her condition But she is still angry, "No, I'm still clawing for the strings, oh I'd do any fucking thing" to go back. She knows she has to "close the door," she cannot go back. She then repeats what she says in when. "I'll have to take what I can get" Defeated. 'When' kinda looks to the future/present of her life "itll be over and I'll still be asking when" 'Before the line' looks back to "Once I saw a fire" a passion for life that was taken away. She allows herself to express the anger about it instead of just the sadness and longing she expresses in 'when'. 'Before the line' has a crack of just desperately clawing for things to go back to before the line but she then comes back down to the reality that they never will

i only realised i had derealization when you started talking about it. for a while, i thought something had changed. i thought all the things you said you thought (that it was just adulthood, that something was wrong with my eyes). this song puts all of those things i've never been able to explain into words. thank you for always being open and for talking about things no one else wants to. things like this, as painful as they are to face, help immensely in letting me know that i'm not the only one and i'm not going crazy. thank you thank you thank you for a beautiful album and a song that will stay with me for the rest of my life.

new favourite all time dodie song holy shit i can't express how this makes me feel

this video seems so so so connected to guiltless , with dodie talking about " something happened " and a " the line between my lives " . and the smoke filling the entire car , similar to the smoke inside the luggage in the music video for guiltless . also someone had mentioned at 3:15 the knocking sounds , paralleling to the line " you opened a door that a kid shouldn't walk through "

The promise she made to herself when she was younger that 'she would stay as happy and in love with life as she was back then'

A list of (almost) every lyrical/musical reference in Before the Line: Air So Sweet - this song ends on the same note used as the drone throughout Air So Sweet (and I’m pretty sure Before the Line also uses it as a drone throughout the whole thing, but I’m not entirely sure since it’s hard to hear at certain parts). Hate Myself - "once I saw fire" might be a lyrical reference to "But how can you not hear the whole conversation I have sitting still with a brain on fire" I Kissed Someone (It Wasn’t You) - "Can't feel a single one" is a reference to the line "I didn't feel a single thing", and "when can I come home?" is similar to "I just want to go home" Cool Girl - idk Special Girl - “It’s not my fault, for I was promised just the same” is a reference to the first line of Special Girl (“It’s not my fault / I was raised by open mouths and tears eyes”) Rainbow - “Too much to miss it anymore” is possibly a reference to “I’d like to think you’d miss it / Cause so would I” in Rainbow ? - idk yet Four Tequilas Down - idk . - idk yet Sorry - idk When - “I’ll have I take what I can get” is a direct reference to the line “I’ll take what I can get” in When, and "I know I loved the world" is sort of a rewritten version of the line "They tell me I loved" Guiltless - someone in another comment mentioned the percussion sounds like knocking on a door, a reference to the line “you opened a door that a kid shouldn’t walk through”. There’s also a mention to a door in Before the Line (“I know I’ll have to close that door”) but I have a feeling it’s not referring to the same “door” as in Guiltless. The line "why doesn't it look right?" may also be an indirect reference to the line "is it real?" Boys Like You - "maybe I am not just a friend" is similar to Cool Girl's "want me more than friend" Additionally, someone mentioned that the “promise” dodie makes to herself might be the same promise mentioned in Secret for the Mad (“I promise you / It’ll all make sense again”), and the smoke makes it feel similar to Burned Out ("I am burnt out / I smell of smoke"). Another thing I'm noticing is a lot of the other songs have references to eyes being closed/not being able to see (Cool Girl - "Rolling your eyes to the backs of your heads", Hate Myself - "Eyes closed isn't helping", Four Tequilas Down - "And tell me did you make your eyes blur?", Guiltless - "But I don't think I'd feel better if I opened your eyes"), which this song also does, in a way. In general, a lot of these songs have lyrical/thematic similarities, which could be intentional to make the songs feel connected (although it might just be because that's how dodie likes to write), so I love finding all these different connections lol Let me know if you found anything else, I’d really like to know what you guys thought!

Dodie sadness is a whole genre and I didn’t even know it existed as this big mammoth and sadness begets more sadness and created more melancholic art that feeds into the melancholy of masses and no emotional state change happens eventually people begin to believe they will be perpetually sad. Ya’ll, what’re you doing? Don’t, please.

i haven't seen anyone mention this but there's this moment at 1:31 that dodie stares longingly at the car door like she desperately wants to leave, but looks back to the smoke that surrounds her and stays longer. it's only at the very end that she storms out. and those flashes of light that line up with the thrum of the instrumentals, as like a continuation of the rain into lightning! so much attention to detail, it's amazing

God this song cuts so deep

pov your car is burning from the inside but you stay in for the aesthetic

;I greet the sun and ask if I already died; sigh

OMG the lighting and smoke and omg how is this so perfect

There was a trauma that happened to me in March, and honestly this entire album is something I can empathize with. Between the boundary issues, being queer, unhealthy/broken relationship(s), and trauma that leaves you with mental fog. I can't stop listening to this album oml, thank you

living with dissociation, this song hits especially hard. looking at something beautiful that used to make you feel something so deep and wondering why you feel nothing bc you're looking at everything behind glass. you have to learn to look at everything through a new reality and take what you can get. and sometimes it gets so bad it feels like you're not in control of your own body and you're almost afraid to speak. dodie being in the driver's seat and finally being in control of her situation is such powerful imagery. love this

all of these are so fucking good i am not coping

everything about this is just utterly exceptional... and that range.... crying through this one

this song in particular feels very musical theatre and I mean that in the best way possible. Something about the way she performs it, the smoke, the intensely personal lyrics without details, it all feels like shes just been left alone on stage by another character. And she sings this and leaves the stage. On my own, burn, the end of our love is god even. It's some sort of horrific magic to pour the emotion out through such a beautiful vessel, throughout the whole album in the music and in the cinematography. It's been six years since I found dodie; her 2018 concert at Shepards bush was my first ever concert :D I'm now 19 and I'm forever grateful to continue to grow up with her music. Jack, Sophie and Ciaran are also to be commended for their roles in this art. Seeing their names on credits is always a sign that whatever project it is will be incredibly executed, no matter the genre, and like dodie I have had the pleasure of running into all of them on youtube many times over the years. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for all that you have given us. xxx

the emotions in this it really hurt it struck me right were it hurts waaaaaa so proud 😭😭

i've never heard anything like this from dodie and im absolutely in love with this song with all my heart. drowning in tears. thank you for those 6 amazing years i've been listening to you and growing with you (im like a year younger so lol)

the contrast between this and air so sweet hURTS air so sweet being excitement for the life you have and the life to come, and this being dread for life to come and wishing to go back and the desperation in the section beginning 1:58 gives me chills

the promise that she made was secret for the mad, right??? damn the emotion and the symbolism in this one is unmatched

THIS, this song gives me goosebumps every single time! the eye contact is gripping and the change of pace partway through the song feels so intriguing, I'm obsessed with it 100%

i've watched this way too many times and still get literal goose bumps by her eyes at "i'd do any fucking thing"

If I die today. They can play this at my funeral. If I die in twenty years, I doubt I’ll have heard a song that speaks to me as much as this.

You know when a song is just so powerful you feel entranced and you can't look away and when it's over you just sit in shock and then start crying? Wow, Dodie... I love your music so much 😭

i remember her posting this song a while back on instagram, (maybe it was an early demo or rough draft) but i just heard the first few lyrics and immediately loved it. i hummed it and sang the little bit i had heard for months, i am so unbelievably happy it's out now :')

As somebody who has battled DPDR since I was a child, I think I'm finally found myself a song that gets it. thank you.

dodie's music is so incredible because it cradles you gently through her emotions. It sounds so calm and gentle but the words just start to punch your heart. The song is the prime example of her skill because she can make you feel so much anger and bitterness without outright yelling. She keeps her voice gentle and almost at a whisper. I'm feeling so much and I can't think anymore, this album is incredible.

Your music is a window into another existence for me. I've never experienced these emotions BUT via your work I have felt some part of them. Thank you.

dodie would be sO GOOD at writing songs for a musical - her music and lyrics always have a very strong narrative and i can totally picture this as a scene in a musical!!!!!

i WAS FREAKING OUT THIS ENTIRE VIDEO.This song is so moving. She put everything into this song and I feel it. Absolutly amazing!!

Dodie.... this is my favorite song that I have ever heard, and truly think it is the best song ever made. My god.

THIS SONG ENDS WITH THE SAME OPENING SOUND OF AIR SO SWEET

I've been dissosiative since about 3 years, and the first verse hit so hard... I miss feeling like I actually belong here and am not just trying to level up on a strange video game.

I love everyone’s interpretations about how the fog symbolizes depression or dissociation and how with depression it gets hard to see past what you’re currently going through. She sings about the light being snatched away, losing the spark or passion for life. And if you notice in the background a spark of light flashes and in the beginning she notices it but it quickly goes away and it eventually gets foggy (the cycle of depression and dissociating comes again) and it’s hard to see the light or find the spark. Because your mind is so foggy it gets hard to notice that it’s even there. But at the end she gets out of the car, separating herself from the depression or dissociation.

Everything of you is so lullaby-ie and half-disney I love this

I love the difference between this and when- it’s like she’s convincing herself she’s okay with being past “16”, and then this song is representative of how deep down she would do anything to go back; she still hasn’t accepted it.

this one really hurts but having a song that describes this feeling so well is almost therapeutic. a good let it all out song

This song feels like its been around forever, so full of feeling and the lyrics cut to a part of my heart i didnt even know existed. Love this dodie, so proud of you ♡

I'm kind of going through a hard time and came to realize that this song is scary relatable. All the sudden crescendos and background ambience vocals add to the anxiety I've experienced The chords have the broken maturity Emmaculate ma'am

I love that Dodie really made the fantasy we all lived as kids looking out rainy bus windows pretending we’re in a music video basically a reality

OH MY GID SHE LOOKS SO GOOD

My favorite new song on the album. Beautiful. (Also, calming and grounding when my own brain feels untethered.)

this song was likely written before the pandemic but bro. the way this makes me feel. I’ve spent a majority of the past year waiting for things to go back to the way they were. I’ve had to (and honestly, we ALL have had to) accept that things will probably never be like they were before. that’s not entirely a bad thing but it still stings. idk I just think this song is a really good representation of how it feels to grapple with living in a situation that has changed every part of me and the world around me

god, the way this one is shot from outside the car with the smoke obscuring her, like she's trapped out? and the way the video for when has us (dodie and the viewer) trapped out from the blurred videos of the past?? poetic cinema!

I discovered Dodie's music and videos less than a year ago. I've been terrifically impressed in a way that music artists use to get ahold of me years ago but it almost never happens anymore. She has worked so hard and produced so much material that I'm quite sure I haven't seen or heard more than a fraction of it so far - which is really great because what I have been watching and listening to, including all those great videos she did with Tesse Violet - well, it has been so good. The idea that there is a lot more just waiting for me to call it up is awesome. If it wasn't for the rise of Yotube and the Internet in general I have to wonder if anyone would have ever even heard of Dodie if she had been coming up in the music industry of 20 or 25 years ago. I think the answer is "yes" she is so singularly talented and appealing that she would have had someone's eye and ear. But I am thinking I personally would probably have missed it. And she would not have had the creative freedom she has now. Music marketing was so very stratified back then. But gosh she really does deliver, song after song, video after video. I don't know anyone who knows who Dodie Clark is who doesn't love her. (In this video, is it just me or is she committing suicide by asphyxiating herself on the auto fumes of the car as it sits running and parked in a carport? You can see the wisps of exhaust smoke floating around near the end. And when she gets up out of the car and leaves I think it is just her soul, her essence. Tell me I'm wrong.)

i love the idea of autonomy laced in this album, especially linked with past trauma

This song is so fucking raw its hits me hard and I love it so much

"I'll have to take what I can get" breaks me and the feeling of resignation in the song during this lyric scares me so so much. The whole thing is so emotional and visceral and Dodie portrayed it perfectly.

There are few songs that give me shivers these days. From 2:00 to the end it was like a constant shiver for me. There is something so true, sad and beautiful about this song and I just am not able to put in in words.

I think it's really cool how the dresses from rainbow and special girl are in the car with her. Maybe it could refer to some of the fire/passion that she let go? She couldn't really enjoy rainbow or special girl to their fullest because of all of the dissociative smoke? Either way it's a really cool detail

the metaphors dodie uses for trauma and dissociation/depersonalization are hauntingly accurate. i'd also do any fucking thing, i'm furious and don't even have a monster to blame

I’ve been feeling these kind of emotions for a while now, never put it into words so every time I listen to this I still cry just like the first time.

"when can i come home" seems like a darker, more desperate version of "put me in a car, i want to go home" from I Kissed Someone.. + this song is amazing, and i love seeing all the easter eggs people have found!

this song is such an intense release if anger and emotions, HAUNTING!!!!!!!!

AHHH THIS IS THAT ONE INSTAGRAM POST that i saved and kept on going back to it thinking you wont release it..... i love it its beautiful thank you so much dodie. thank you for this

I feel like “I have the close the door” refers to “I opened a door a kid shouldn’t walk through” from guiltless. It seems to imply that she needs to close the door and accept that yes she shouldn’t have opened it as a kid but now it’s too late. She’s grown up. Her view on life is cynical and she needs to accept she can’t go back. Hence she needs to shut the door and stay on the side that her kid self shouldn’t be in.

this is a beautifully powerful song. To me, I think shes singing about struggling with depersonalization. It feels to me like she is angry and doesnt know where the depersonalization or disassociation came from (all i know is i saw fire) and has been fighting it for so long that she sometimes thinks about letting the disassociation take control. Im sure theres some other great takes on it but this is the thing that makes the most sense to me

That hurts... im crying... I feel the same thing... I always ask to myself: Why do I not belong? And now, this song, I belong with the ones that feel the same ❤🌸

from the first time i heard this song ive pictured it so viscerally as the dramatic solo song in a musical where all this character's emotion and desperation rises to the surface and they're about to do a big plot-changing action

These videos really bring the songs to life!

Man this song is focking powerful, so dissapointed and destroyed, yet so strong to never give up

holy shit just watched this whole album in order and i am fucking speechless

Wow-what a masterpiece. Thanks for putting music and visuals to this feeling Dodie and Jack! After this video, I'm thinking more about the "I made a promise but I break it every day" line. Some promises have to be broken. You are all so loved, your future is brighter than you can imagine. If breaking a promise is what it takes to get you through the day, it's worth it.

This song is like a punch to the gut. I almost cry every time I watch this video. Fucking incredible.

some of my favourite lyrics from dodie everrrrr this is so poetic and beautiful and heartwrenching

i have depersonalization/derealization as well and when i heard this song i just cried for a good 10 minutes because somebody just GETS IT. thank you dodie. for everything.

The stark contrast between this and “Air So Sweet” is beautifully tragic