Emily Gilmore: The Motivations Behind Her Actions & Why They Are So Important (more rory slander??) 

yes, someone of her time, doing her best but with the values of her culture and time

She’s a rich white woman who married into money and stayed in money honestly I didnt expect her to end up any different but she is a complex character. Love her and hate her

She is a rather horrible person, but with a few good qualities.

@@monkeytoto yeah 100% emily gets a pass because of her funny lines but bruh her and richard are so absuive and toxic to lorelai

No she’s def a horrible person

I will never understand why y’all like Emily she’s a terrible person

She only had a soft side for Rory. She was horrible to Lorelai and what she did to Lorelai and Luke was uncalled for.

What was she like in Day in the Life? (Also do I need to watch all of GG to watch Day in the Life?

@@stefanmakara373 yes. Watch all of Gilmore girls because it’s like an epilogue to their story.

Also, don't watch Day in the Life, unless you have way too much time to pass and enjoy being severely disappointed.

you mean year in the life?

Thank you for making my point

yes but she also had no empathy towards lorelai and why she was feeling like she had to run away. despite her having every right to have a negative reaction to her child running away, she made it her own sob story without even considering how that must've felt for lorelai. many people just chalk it up to bad parenting, but i think emily might have been genuinely abusive during lorelai's youth.

@@annalynes yeah, emily was at least like borderline abusive and Richard was extremely neglectful (to both lorelai and emily actually)

@@sofiaboo6739 exactly! so many ppl don’t realize that she wasn’t just mean, that could be construed as literal abuse

@@annalynes oh boy I could write a series of essays on Richard & Emily’s lack of emotional support for both Lorelei & each other…1. Richard allowed his rotten mother to treat Emily with such disrespect in her own house & even made a crack about it to Lorelei @ one point…2. He was dismissive of Emily over anything she might’ve been going through & seemed to belittle her role as a wife mother & socialite…he was definitely not there for Lorelei & treated Rory leaps & bounds better & they definitely abused Lorelei because she always reverted to being a child whenever she was around them…they never allowed her to live her own life nor did they listen & my goodness the micromanaging the manipulation the gaslighting the passive aggressive dismissive cold behavior even when they were in the wrong & then they wondered why she had commitment issues

That was what confused me the most about Emily's actions and storyline

I feel like she thought that Luke was more likely to further ostracise Loreli from her and Richard. I.e. if Loreli had married someone more in Emily and Richards circles or even (in their opinion) of their social standing, there would be more of a chance she wouldn't push them away (again). I think Emily felt threatened by Luke in that way. But that's just my opinion.

Maybe it was the writers? Wouldn't be the first time we see characters do a 180 to suit dramatic plot lines

It never made sense to me either.. I think its obvious that this was done to create drama

in an episode, she get lorelai to admit she might like luke and emily says thank you and then tells her they have to talk about what she could possibly be thinking. she just wanted lorelai to admit it and be open with her. she probably found luke ok as a friend of lorelai, but once they started dating and saw how serious they were, she started acting the way she did.

They weren't poor. Lorelai wasn't as rich as her parents, sure, but she DID run a successful inn and was able to afford Rory many luxuries.

@@barbiesplasticp7872 But we also have to remember that at the beginning of everything they lived in a tiny house with not proper bathroom outside the inn, we don’t know as viewers when they started to live in their actual house.

Completely agree. Some of the things she said and did were unjustifiably cruel. There's a fine line between having empathy for what a person has been through and allowing them a pass for their awful behavior.

Not

So true

I thought the spa trip was one of the few times Loralie was a complete jerk I know Emily was being a bit annoying but Loralie could have handled it better.

@@tiffanygrever8092 bull shit.

Emily was a jerk all Lorelai wanted to was relax and Emily wouldn't let her. Lorelai had her schedule kicked out and Emily changed it. Plus Emily quilt trip Lorelai into going so who is the jerk.

I see where you are coming from. However, Emily's success was not self made. She came from money and married into money. Now, if you're referring to the image and reputation she developed for herself and the Gilmore name, I can kind of see where you're coming from. But, even still she is not responsible for the entire recognition of her name and the Gilmore name. For her name, that is in part due to Richard given that so much of her success was linked to being his wife and related to his contacts. For the Gilmore name, she played a role but she didn't shape it. After all, she married into it.

She didn’t change from good to bad, she changed from bad to good, the opposite as her children.

@@katie-yg8ci she only had one child

@@katie-yg8ci she didn't change at all. She still was mean and controlling. What was good that was changed cause I didn't see it.

No story Emily was the best girl

This comment!

Lawd yes!!

Mmh it really depends. Sometimes she really was but her way to do things was just the worst lmao

realy?

Yes!!!!

Emily got a taste of her own medicine when Trix is in town.

Lorelei had her reasons & Emily wasn’t innocent…she & Richard were controlling & manipulative which are forms of abuse & they constricted Lorelei’s natural character & spirit which is wrong…

Such a great episode. And it breaks my heart when Emily basically pretends their heart-to-heart didn't happen. Too much pride. I think it's very well portrayed.

To me Emily displayed her true "love" for her daughter when in season 2, I believe she politely but FIRMLY asked Christopher to "I think you had better leave ...... NOW! When Lorelei exclaimed "it hurts!" When he repeatedly badgered her about Rory .......

I’m sorry your mother was like Emily that must’ve been tough…it’s sad when ppl refuse to see their children as individuals rather than someone to live vicariously through by means of controlling them

Yes Richard was emotionally unavailable when it came to Lorelei & Emily to an extent

@@Nanubaby3385 i hated richard way more than any other character

@@manicpixiecoffeelovr it’s infuriates me how the ENTIRE blame for their poor relationship gets placed on LORELEI’S shoulders especially since Richard nor Emily never even so much as attempted to relate to their daughter in ANY way or even meet her HALFway BOTH were always so cold & distant RICHARD in particular they criticized & nitpicked EVERYTHING Lorelei did & spoiled Rory ROTTEN & were then surprised when she acted like an ungrateful brat once she wouldn’t do what they wanted & they couldn’t control her TERRIBLE listeners BOTH of them & as for the character I detested the MOST??? That honor goes to TRIX Richard’s ROTTEN WITCH of a mother…is it any WONDER why Richard seemed cold & unfeeling??? Look @ his mother!!! And oh my the way she treated Emily in her OWN house & even WORSE Richard ALLOWED it!!! I was sooo happy when she was GONE

@@Nanubaby3385 totally agree 💯

She wasn’t emotionally abusive. She was realistic. Lorelei was annoying angsty teenager that did everything in her power to purposefully piss off her parents. That’s why she ended the way that she did

@@Blackgirlmagic2000 she was abusive…she tried to control everything Lorelei did & continued to do so well into her adult life ie setting her up on dates she didn’t ask for trying to break up her & Luke via Christopher she used any form of passive aggressive behavior she could she gaslit her & then would get upset when Lorelei & Rory didn’t react the way she wanted…she never once apologized for being so critical of Lorelei & never failed to throw her mistakes in her face & for Pete’s sake couldn’t let go or accept the fact that she got knocked up @ 16 & ran away from home even after Lorelei tried to make peace…she constantly criticized Lorelei just because she didn’t agree with her lifestyle…she could be a cruel woman & Lorelei could be equally as cruel

I don't agree. When Rory was living at her grandparents house they did give her everything and I feel like they also were there for her emotionally. The only thing that pissed Rory off was that they were stricter (she wasn't allowed to sleep at Logans) but compared to other parents or grandparents they weren't too strict at all. She should have been more thankful and respecting towards their rules as they gave her a good place to stay when she dropped out.

@@Blackgirlmagic2000 your in feniel of you don't think Emily is absive. All you see and blame Lorelai but. Never see what Emily does to Lorelai.

@@munchkinbas00 they treated Rory like a 5 year old. Picking out her clothes and having the maid to everything for her.

Yes April & Anna were the WORST & Luke let them control every aspect of his life…they were Lorelei & Rory lite decaf diet discount aaannnddd cheap KNOCK OFFS it was sooo annoying

Yeah that's why I couldn't stand her. I wanted to reach through the tv and slap her in the face every time she demanded Lorelai to tell her thinks or blames her for something stupid.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

She has a funny way of loving her daughter.

She had a funny way of loving Lorelai.

I think Emily did come from a privileged background. It's interesting that we have scant detail about Emily's upbringing, but we do get some. Emily went to Smith College, a private women's college in Northampton, MA. While it's possible she attended as a financial aid student, it's more likely that she and other women attending in the late 50's/early 60's were from wealthy families. When she reminisces about when she got married, she notes that her mother had seamstresses working day and night on her wedding dress. She also talks about accidentally running into Richard at their club before they got married. During Rory's coming out event, she's horrified by the flowers and tablecloths that were much more elegant and high-class in her day. That said, I suspect she came from a family of means, but perhaps not one that had as much money as Richard's family. I would guess that's why his mother looked down on Emily. We saw this with Rory and Logan's family - this idea that the wealthy have a pecking order based on net worth.

@@favoriteemail Well, while I would like to challenge some of your points, one of the main reasons why I think Emily came from a family that had known poverty at some point, like with Sweetie, was because it was meant to mirror Rory. By adulthood she was about upper-class, and most of her adolescences was middle-class, but her early childhood at the inn should be classified as her being lower-class. Rory puts a charming spin on it for her grandmother, but her childhood room in the shed, the one with a bathroom without walls, was not that far above being homeless. I alway kind of suspected that part of the reason Rory was so well read was because they could not afford tv or other forms of entertainment, also out of a class insecurity to come off as more classy, and that desire to go up a class through academia might have been part of the reason she was so driven in the first place. I think that her inability to break up with boyfriends comes from her erratic-poverty early childhood which gave her a deep need for stability that a constant boyfriend would give her. I guess this is all conjecture. But I thought it would have been cleverly written in theme with the show, about how your upbringing can hard wire you in ways that effect the rest of your life. And as an important statement on class, where you don't know what some one's journey through social mobility has been, or how what counts as upper class is just what can pass as upper class

Yes PLEASE a video on Luke. He's my favorite character by far

@Gul Tengiz Oh certainly Lorelai was a difficult child. She was a rebellious soul seeking to find her own identity and way- apart from the confines of an inherited identity. That is one of the most respectable things about her, and the other is that she eventually comes to understand and respect her mother's position as well - and eventually makes amends (one of the few good points of the generally TERRIBLE revisit Netflix mini-series). Unfortunately, the doting and privilege Rory experiences ruins her- sadly an entirely common and believable story typical of her generation.

I didn't learn to appreciate Emily at all. I think she is a bitch

Having gone through therapy for ADHD, it’s almost infuriating to watch this show at (almost) 32 - Lorelai’s age. Oof. She needed adhd meds and a therapist cause holy crap… textbook case.

@Someone 333 first saying that is very rude to everyone dying of a “sick body”. But it also goes against the point in the video…implying that Emily would have a right to treat her that way if she were actually physically sick.

Emily dont know whats best for Lorelai and she thinks she does but she doesnt.

Yes she is

I don't think it was attitude at all. I think she was concerned.

Yeah Emiily was a queean of gaslighting Lorelai all the time. And Emily didnt understand boundries when it came to Lorelai.

They all did not just one person

@@lauriecarson6483 she made the show.

@@Misu.A you can say it over and over again and it still wont change my mind. They all made the show.

👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼

To me Lorelai wanted to be seen and heard by her mother. And she very rarely was. Emily wanted her to be like she imagined her, instead of getting to know her child. She wanted control to the point of emotional manipulation and blackmail. She was a very flawed parent who really needed therapy to work on her issues. Lorelai is definitely not perfect either, having the childhood she had and the fact she needed to grow up quickly to raise her kid. But she was very justified in many angry outbursts she had. Anger shows when your boundaries are crossed. Emily constantly crossed boundaries without even noticing she had. She was very willfully ignorant of her daughters wants and needs. She projected a lot on her without asking. Their relationship is fascinating bc that dynamic is very common among many real life families.

yeah no, emily is a perfect example of an emotionally abusive mother

I hate how Emily treats Lorelai. No mom should treat their kids like crap.

its lorelai

Emily wanted Lorelai to ne just like her and Lorelai didn't want that life style. And Lorelai didn't let Rory repeat her life.

@@lelec6923 I think J Ren hates lorelai and likes to call her lora-lie. Although I disagree with J Ren, Lorelai made her own choices that made things difficult for her but she wanted things to be better for Rory and was even willing to go back to her parents in order to make that happen.

@@spiderdog07 oh 😭 i didnt realise

Cause they are snobby and think people are beneath them. What is there to like.

Emily is worse then Rory ever was.

​@@lauriecarson6483 ...