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European Portuguese | How to Be Polite [Você FINALLY Explained!]

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European Portuguese | How to Be Polite [Você FINALLY Explained!] - Making sure you are being polite when you speak Portuguese can be a bit of a minefield. So if you’re confused about when to use the word "você" in Portuguese without accidentally being impolite, you’re not alone. In this video, we break down the nuances of this tricky word and learn how to stay polite in every conversation. Let’s set your mind at ease! - Filmed in Lisbon, Portugal by Liz Sharma, a Portuguese teacher in Lisbon and founder of Talk the Streets.
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28 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 110

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Has this been confusing you? What else can I help with in my weekly videos? Let me know!

@ogator8642 10 месяцев назад

Very clearly explained. A senhora explica muito claramente.

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Thank you! ☺️

@brunomadeira8432 10 месяцев назад

The advice was spot on and captures very well the Portuguese people quirks. I will add something. If you want to be formal and the lady seems young or just younger you could say "a menina fala inglês". This is a bit old fashioned and somewhat like addressing someone in English as miss or mrs. For men don't use "o menino" unless it's a kid. It will be very patronizing and diminishing. Just keep "o senhor", it won't have the same effect as calling "a senhora" to a young lady.

@Wooooomaia 10 месяцев назад

Well said!

@fancynancy2888 10 месяцев назад

I remember being in my late 30s having a conversation with a woman I guessed to be at least in her 70s. We just met and I had not yet addressed her yet as "a senhora" but I would soon in conversation, to be formal and as she is older. But, she beat me to it! I was expecting her to use "você" to address me as I am younger than her but she addressed me as "a senhora" first. First time it happened to me...I felt so old! 😆

@imeandmyself525 10 месяцев назад

Don't feel old. It's not a question of age, it's of education. The lady, despite being older, would be being rude if she addressed you as "você", perhaps she could have spoken without the pronoun, just conjugating in the 3rd person, so as not to seem so formal. I NEVER use "você", and I rebuke anyone who treats me as such. Unfortunately, it is increasingly common, perhaps due to Brazilian influence, in television

@vervideosgiros1156 10 месяцев назад

@@imeandmyself525You should've said " it's a question of good manners".

@mendesvideo 10 месяцев назад

You shouldn’t feel old. That was a sign of respect.

@swifteh1780 5 месяцев назад

I'm a British native that's been teaching English in Espana, France, and now Portugal, and the general feeling among the younger generations, is that the formal tone is old fashioned, and more and more of the younger generations really don't care at all about the formal/informal language. I think it's to do with the fact that more and more people - especially younger generations - are speaking English more casually in their everyday lives, and realising that having this concept of 1 language for some people, and 1 for another isn't really necessary, and it's just a thing that's been conditioned into people for countless generations.

@jaime_el_brujito 9 месяцев назад

this makes so much sense with my grandmother who brought all of these things to English from Portuguese. she hates being referred to as you in english, and especially doesn’t like when people refer to her by she/her instead of by her name when she’s in the room. she always says something along the lines of “why are you guys talking about me like i’m not here??” followed by an expression i don’t remember that goes like “do you think i’m the cat’s mother?”. she also refers to people in third person a lot. thanks so much for the video! it not only helps me understand portuguese but also the things my portuguese grandmother considers impolite!

@TalktheStreets 9 месяцев назад

So interesting, thanks for sharing!

@alixslayton3624 6 месяцев назад

I truly appreciate your videos! Your explanations are clear and easy to follow. Obrigada!

@TalktheStreets 6 месяцев назад

I'm so glad!

@angelinapita2671 10 месяцев назад

A explicação não poderia ter sido melhor. Eu, como brasileira até hoje não tinha entendido bem essa diferença do uso do "você"

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Boa, fico contente!

@desanipt 10 месяцев назад

Randomly starting being addressed by someone with "o senhor/a senhora", as a Portuguese, when you're in your 20s/30s is like going through puberty all again. It makes you feel like you're changing in ways you did not want to you 🥲

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

It's nice to be a "menina/o" forever eheh!

@rose_yts 4 месяца назад

Thank you, I was going crazy with the guesswork.

@TalktheStreets 4 месяца назад

De nada!

@basementstudio7574 10 месяцев назад

Thanks for the video. My wife and I were in Portugal in July and when we needed information or directions in English we would use, Desculpa senhor/senhora, fala inglês. That seemed to work and no-one looked like they got offended.

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

That's great!

@brunomadeira8432 10 месяцев назад

If you are asking for an English speaker you would have to say something terribly bad for someone to take offence. Being a foreigner you get some slack :D. Either way you were extremely polite, addressing someone as "o senhor" or "a senhora" is as good as it gets.

@basementstudio7574 10 месяцев назад

Thanks. That’s what I was hoping for.

@keanancupido 10 месяцев назад

A lovely video Liz!! I really enjoyed that info about why você was considered rude. Interestingly, in South Africa we often use the person's name as well to be polite. This is because of a language called Afrikaans (which I speak) So you'd say, would aunty Maria like a cup of tea? As an example. When I learned this in Portuguese it was super easy to do this because I understood the concept 🙈🙈❤️❤️

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

So interesting, thanks for sharing!! ☺️

@Krka1716 10 месяцев назад

Very interesting. I was not aware that in Afrikaans there is such kind of construction...😊 May I ask what person is used in those cases? Second or third person conjugation/pronouns?

@keanancupido 10 месяцев назад

@@Krka1716 I'm so glad you found it interesting! I always thought it was normal, because we also do this in English here when we're talking with adults. In Afrikaans we do this with second person. So, "Will tannie Maria 'n koppie tee hê?" But there's no conjugation in Afrikaans because the verbs stay the same for every pronoun

@estoril4271 9 месяцев назад

This is the first time I've ever heard of the word voce as a derogatory term. I was raised to use voce as a sign of respect for any adult, family or otherwise. Friends and cousins, I used tu, parents, aunts, other adults, I used voce. I was born in 1960. Thank you for this. We left Portugal in 1964 and I use your channel to fill in a lot of the blanks.

@TalktheStreets 9 месяцев назад

So glad it was helpful!

@dfk09 10 месяцев назад

I'm a Brazilian Portuguese language speaker who likes to drop in your channel from time to time to get the intricacies of European Portuguese especially since I will be travelling to Portugal in a few weeks. EP sounds more beautiful to me every time I hear it. At the end of the day, it's the same language. However, the nuances are so fascinating to me. I was always worried about the use of Você in Portugal. Your video makes a lot of sense. As a Jamaican who grew up here, I have about half my family who lives in England, and they have been there for generations. When they speak, especially the really young ones, it's with an English accent. The Brazilian-Portuguese/ European Portuguese is more nuanced than British English and American English. When I recently had a chat with someone from Portugal, I would sometimes say "você" to her while talking instead of "tu". I kept apologizing because in the back of my mind, I heard it was rude and I didn't want to offend her. She laughed and was gracious about it possibly because she's had a lot of exposure to the Brazilian accent. I've studied BP for six years and have traveled to Brazil a number of times and I can't recall once using "tu". I can't wait to get to Portugal!

@imeandmyself525 10 месяцев назад

Don't worry, if you speak BP will be more easily accepted if you say "você"

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Thanks for sharing! And yes, Portuguese people are aware that Brazilians use você so they don't consider that rude :)

@nuno289 8 месяцев назад

"Tu" can be a lack of respect when referring to elders. It's usually used between people of similar ages, atleast to my knowledge

@larrylee7682 10 месяцев назад

What a great explanation of why você may not be the most appropriate choice of 'you' to use. Obrigado!

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Glad you enjoyed it!

@pom999 4 месяца назад

As a matter of fact, ''você'' is never rude, I use it all the time. It is the normal polite form of talking to people you're not ''intimate'' with. The quote you made is a very specific use of the langage, from the 1950's. You would have exactly the same situation, if your boss for instance talks to you using ''tu'', while you are forced to answer using ''você'' or ''o senhor''. It simply shows the hierarchy between people talking to each other, when one is more powerful and rude to the other. The word is Ok. Some (very rare ) people are rude. And foreign people learning to talk portuguese will NEVER be considered rude if they use ''você''. People will think they are polite, because they try to learn the language. 😉

@rosaluxbg 10 месяцев назад

Thank you very much for this very good explanation, Liz. I was unsure, why to avoid this word, because I was told it would be rude to use it. I am thankful of your videos.

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Glad it was helpful!

@joehalpin8261 2 месяца назад

I’m sure I read somewhere that the following response to a greeting would be: Q. Como esta? (Or ‘Tudo bem?’) A. Bem, obrigado. E você? Is this incorrect?

@mendesvideo 10 месяцев назад

Eu gosto muito de ser chamado de senhor. Uso sempre “o senhor” ou “a senhora” sempre que me dirijo a pessoas mais velhas do que eu ou a quem não tenho intimidade. Também uso “a senhora” quando converso com minha mãe.

@SergeMTL 10 месяцев назад

Portugal should reinstate the usage of "vós" in day-to-day speech. It would make addressing people much simpler. In French, you have "TU" (informal) and "VOUS" (formal). 🤔

@skurinski 10 месяцев назад

Its used only regionally and by older people

@user-gx9uk5cj7e 10 месяцев назад

I love your teaching so much, I watch your all the videos, how can we talk ms.? Is is possible for private class as well? ,I really want to improve my portuguese.

@Wooooomaia 10 месяцев назад

Thank you!!! I have been wondering this a lot recently!!!

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

You're so welcome!

@bikramthapa480 10 месяцев назад

Brilliant really thanks madam.

@JuanSoares-sf8zn 10 месяцев назад

In Brazil the same situation in some cases.

@jessicamagenheimer4095 10 месяцев назад

Super helpful Liz! One clarifying question… let’s say you’re asked how you are, and you want to ask how the other person is in return… is “e você?” running into this same issue?

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

I'm glad! E você? / E tu? / E a Ana? / E o senhor/a?

@vpf5295 10 месяцев назад

Great explanation!

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Glad it was helpful!

@mehrlicht1 10 месяцев назад

Also, when your job has to do with dealing with customers, you would probably use "O Senhor .... ? As for using the person's name: People use it but I, personally, find people are trying to manipulate me if they treat me by my name and the polite conjugation

@AxeDharme 10 месяцев назад

I never ever use "você". I just drop the word altogether and use the 3rd person singular conjugation. Now I have used o senhor/a senhora to mixed reviews. Women especially between the ages 20-40 don't like being called "senhora". They say "a senhora está no céu" 😂😂😂

@cfoj8089 10 месяцев назад

That's a good one!

@HMartins-351 10 месяцев назад

O seu português está a ficar tão bom que até o seu inglês, volta e meia, soa a inglês de um português :)

@susanhighfield3370 10 месяцев назад

Brilliant, really helpful

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

So glad!

@UbuTube 10 месяцев назад

You've done a pretty good job of explaining something that is almost impossible to explain. You basically need to have been born here to understand how the same word can both be formal and offensive. Do you know that "você" is a contraction of the very archaic "Vossa Mercê",which used to be the way to address the king? That origin may somehow explain its dubious meaning. Here's my five cents; if in a conversation you are not expected to address the other person with much formality and you use "você" it will be felt as formal and respectful. If in a conversation you are expected to treat the other person with a high level of respect/deference and you use "você" it will be felt as "taking liberties".

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

So interesting, thanks for sharing!

@valeriek16 10 месяцев назад

Very helpful!

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

I'm glad! :)

@paulflute 10 месяцев назад

brilliant.. thank you.. I live in Portugal and use Google translate often.. which defaults to Brazilian.. So I do a lot of copy paste.. then go in and remove all the Vocês.. and most of the Eus too.. I find mostly here personal pronouns are not used much.. just the verb forms are fine..

@maryr7593 10 месяцев назад

Deepl is the translator to use for Euro Portuguese.

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Glad it was helpful! And yes, I recommend DeepL!

@magbstyle 10 месяцев назад

Very helpful

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Glad to hear that!

@kfelix2934 10 месяцев назад

Thank you for that pro tip and I just started doing this 3 months ago, When ever I start seeing myself saying VC I substitute the person name or title. It makes the communications seems more personal IMHO. e.g você como estas? vs "Senhorita como você esta ? o "Sophie como você estas?

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Exactly, well done!

@Krka1716 9 месяцев назад

If you wish to sound really native in PT, you could say Como estás (tu)? (theres is inversion) or even more commonly - 'como é que (tu) estás? (no inversion) Third person addressing (higher deference or more formal) 'senhorita' is not used in PT, but you can use 'menina' or 'senhora'... 'como está?' 'como está a senhora?' (inversion) 'como é que (a senhora) está? 'como é que está (a senhora)? (inversion) if you know the name and feel able to take the liberty... 'como está a Sofia?' 'como é que a Sofia está?' 'como é que está a Sofia?' You can't go wrong in Portugal if you follow these hints...😊

@JoseAntonio-tt2mb 10 месяцев назад

Você aprendeu ingles na Inglaterra?

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

I'm English!

@vervideosgiros1156 10 месяцев назад

@@TalktheStreetsThe first time I heard you, with Leo, I thought that you were a portuguese who lived in England for quite sometime, pr that you were english, living in Portugal since forever! Your accent is incredible! I follow your channel for a while, now!

@swifteh1780 5 месяцев назад

So, let me get this straight. Saying voce, to 1 person is not okay, because it seems that you're looking down on that person. But saying voces, is perfectly acceptable because it's to multiple people? Is looking down on multiple people socially acceptable in Portugal?

@aracelialvarezcederborg3526 Месяц назад

Si estamos en un restaurante y necesitamos usar un pronombre con el mesero, cuyo nombre ignoramos, por ejemplo: Y usted, qué opina?; Y usted, qué me recomienda?; Me va a atender usted o el otro muchacho?, podemos usar Você con él?

@TalktheStreets 28 дней назад

It's always a personal choice if you want to use você - you can use it, but as explained in this video, it can be considered a bit rude! You can simply use the verb instead: "O que acha?" "O que me recomenda?" "É o senhor/a senhora que nos vai atender?"

@Alxmir23 10 месяцев назад

new barista at work is brazilian. will definitely help me

@skurinski 10 месяцев назад

Not really

@TheAlbertso 10 месяцев назад

Good vid. Thanks for the clarification, Liz. Sharing it on facebook. Ideas for possible videos: Those ticket machines for waiting. Any trick to using them? Also, 1. how do the public and private health systems differ? 2. I had one doc in the States. In almost 4 years I've been to six "general" docs, here who don't seem to treat much and physicals don't seem very comprehensive, instead they just send you to specialists to check out specific areas.

@maryr7593 10 месяцев назад

Expats Everywhere has a great vid on private vs public system.

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Glad you liked it! Do you mean the senhas? Just have to take one and wait for your number ☺️

@TheAlbertso 10 месяцев назад

@@TalktheStreets Não sei no que estava a pensar. Estou constipado.

@Roosmarijn035 10 месяцев назад

Have been living in Portugal for almost a year now and did not know this. I never use the pronouns because no one does really, except for in aulas portuguese where we do use 'eu'. I thought 'você' was like the French 'vous', the German 'sie' or the Dutch 'u', when speaking to someone of more authority or someone older. Never in a million years would I have thought that people could find 'você' condescending.

@Krka1716 9 месяцев назад

It is true some people may find the explicit use of 'você' condescending or unfriendly distant, but that depends very much on the 'tone' or 'attitude' of the speaker. More than anything else... I believe the omission of 'você' is more a question of refinement.

@trismegian2410 10 месяцев назад

if i speak to a friend I use "tu" ; if I have to be formal I use "o sehnor" All this is clear. But how do I address a shop assistant in a shop, maybe a young clerk? "Tu" would be too confidential or even rude; on the other side "o senhor" would sound probably pompous. What is the intermediate solution? Thanks from Italy

@Krka1716 10 месяцев назад

In such a case 'tu' would only be admissible if the clerk were a close friend or colleague, 'senhor' would be akward given the age of the clerk and the degree of formality. The common use is third person addressing, avoiding the explicit use of 'você' (equivalent to the italian third person while dropping the 'Lei'). Some people have no problems using the 'você' explicitly, but I personally find it less polite or refined... The portuguese protocols are truly subtle and gradative...😉

@trismegian2410 10 месяцев назад

Thanks, I appreciated your answer

@Krka1716 9 месяцев назад

@@trismegian2410 My pleasure!🙏

@luzkuhlman 9 месяцев назад

👏 "Promo SM"

@UltimateMoralizer 10 месяцев назад

Em português do Brasil não é rude nada haha mas em português de Portugal é mais formal.

@AkiraUema 10 месяцев назад

I'm Brazilian so I cannot live without using "você" lol! The usage of "tu" feels a bit unnatural to me (sounds a bit archaic and literary to my ears) and "o(a) senhor(a)" is way too formal. There are times I use "tu", but it's usually when I'm talking to my friends but conjugating the verb in the 3rd person, like "tu vai", "tu fala", but this usage is part of colloquial BP and I wouldn't use it with someone I'm not familiar with.

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Thanks for sharing!!

@mehrlicht1 10 месяцев назад

Another tópic: 2nd person plural: Vocês or Vós? People from Lisbon, younger generations and older people already infected with the centralization of the language in the Media use Vocês with the conjugation of the 3rd person plural. The right way, as you can see in the conjugations, would be Vós. But nowadays this is seen as archaic. Damn the Lisbon domination!

@joaquimsilvadomingues6927 10 месяцев назад

❤❤❤❤❤🇵🇹🇵🇹🇵🇹❤️❤️❤️❤️

@vooides 10 месяцев назад

Te faltan 30 años para ser senhora 😝 Guapísima como siempre 💔

@SergeMTL 10 месяцев назад

To make it simple, you can just shorten "você" with an unstressed "cê" before the verb. It may pass unnoticed. cê FALA PORTUGUÊS? 😀

@hannahwalmer1124 10 месяцев назад

You Brazilian or Portuguese?

@brunomadeira8432 10 месяцев назад

@@hannahwalmer1124 Yes, an European speaker wouldn't shorten the "você".

@imeandmyself525 10 месяцев назад

"cê" even worse than "você"

@TalktheStreets 10 месяцев назад

Not in Portugal, but yes in Brazil!

@theresiacunha7433 10 месяцев назад

👍👏💕🌹

@effortlesssuccess2585 6 месяцев назад

Você is not considered formal. It’s considered polite according to the books that I’ve been studying. Formal would be using “o Senhor” or “a Senhora” When we are speaking to people we don’t know well, like the postman, cashier etc. you would use the pronoun “você.” I’m not sure why you are teaching that it is formal, when it isn’t. And I’m also not sure why this type of grammar rule varies from one Portuguese to another. It should be basic grammar lessons, that all Portuguese should agree and know what “Você” means.

@TalktheStreets 6 месяцев назад

Você is indeed considered formal by many native speakers who refuse to use it. But yes, as I've mentioned in the video, it's a tricky topic even amongst natives!

@effortlesssuccess2585 6 месяцев назад

@@TalktheStreets Those native speakers don’t know their own language then. Você is polite. Formal is “o Senhor and a Senhor.” Being polite is different from being formal.

@silveriorebelo2920 7 месяцев назад

to use 'você' is a sign a poor culture - because you can use senhor/senhora, or the name of the person, used in the third voice, as the way to address him or her

@zairoart 10 месяцев назад

Voce e estrebaria

@vervideosgiros1156 10 месяцев назад

Depende: se forem pessoas de meia idade com alguma confiança, mas não muita intimidade, muitas vezes dizem você. Eu também não gosto e prefiro dizer "o João" ou "a Maria", em vez de "você". Os "tios" mais peneirentos muitas vezes tratam-se assim; mesmo os casais e, claro, por serem peneirentos tratam as empregadas por tu... mesmo que tenham idade para serem suas avós! Felizmente de uma maneira geral, as pessoas em Portugal não são classistas: os que são, ou são aqueles multimilionários no seu condomínio de luxo, ou os novos-ricos... as pessoas verdadeiramente finas tratam por "tu", se forem pessoas próximas, ou pelo nome -"o João", "a Maria", ou "o senhor"/"a senhora", se se dirigir a alguém mais velho, ou a uma pessoa com quem não temos nenhuma confiança.

@zairoart 10 месяцев назад

@@vervideosgiros1156 e falta de respeito usar "voce" entre pessoas de igual statura social. Tambem e falta de respeito usar "tu" com pessoas com quem nao se tem intimidade. "Peneirentos" nao tem nada a ver para a conversa. Esta a usar a palavra e atribuindo um significado diferente. Peneirento significa vaidoso. Deve consultar o dicionario de lingua Portuguesa. A situacao economica nao tem nada a ver para o caso, independente de idade. Esta a tentar esclarecer o que nao entende.

@vervideosgiros1156 10 месяцев назад

@@zairoart Ao contrário do meu comentário, que foi bem explícito, o seu é confuso e bastante mal explicado. Eu disse que também não gosto de ouvir dizer "você" e que acho indelicado. É verdade que os "tios" às vezes se tratam por "você" e que tratam por "tu" as criadas com idade para ser mãe deles. É má educação tratar as pessoas idosas por "tu", quando não são muito próximas: se os "tios" acham normal tratar a empregada velhota por "tu", também ela o deveria fazer. A diferença de tratamento entre pessoas da mesma idade não faz sentido, a menos em situações formais, como laborais, entre outras. Se eu for ao hospital, trato a médica por Dra., mas se a conhecesse a mesma pessoa num círculo de amigos, trata-la-ia pelo nome, porque ali não interessava se a dita era médica ou não, percebeu?! Diz que eu devia consultar um dicionário, mas é o senhor que não escreve de forma correta: compare o seu comentário (bastante mal-educado, por sinal...) e o meu e verá!

@vervideosgiros1156 10 месяцев назад

@@zairoart Não sei como é que define que o que diz é correto e o que eu digo, não: o que os betos fazem na sua torre p de marfim não me interessa para nada! É má educação tratar a empregada por "tu" a empregada... tenha ela estudos ou não tenha! Se os "tios" se tratam por "você" é lá com eles, mas isso não lhes dá p direito de destratarem que os criou! Esse classismo está mais que ultrapassado! Entre pessoas não empertigadas é perfeitamente aceitável o tratamento por "tu" se as pessoas são novas, mesmo que não tenham intimidade! Os adolescentes e as crianças tratam-se por "tu".