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Every Swear in The Magnus Archives (ish) 

Owen Shirrell
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A few things:
1) This is, unfortunately, not quite comprehensive. I relied heavily on the unofficial TMA Transcript Archive while collecting these clips, and I only found out after the fact that those transcripts are based on auto-generated subtitles- which in some cases censor harsher language. As a result, there are a few missing here and there, but this is as close to every swear as I could feasibly get.
2) The swears were never intended to sync up with the music, the few spots where that happened are pure coincidence and it's amazing.
3) F in the chat for the "cock" in MAG 103 that didn't get included, partially because 11 categories wouldn't be symmetrical and partially because in that context it wasn't really used as a swear.
4) Special shoutout to Cass for providing episode lists for a few of the words, Saj and Haley for their graphic design help, Lottie for accidentally providing the funniest thumbnail I've ever had, and the rest of the DMFZ server for their input on multiple aspects of this project.
Audio used is from The Magnus Archives (by Rusty Quill), with music by Jacques Offenbach.

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28 сен 2024

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Комментарии : 322   
@corycarver3121
@corycarver3121 3 года назад
character swear count Jon: 44 Martin: 29 Basira: 13 Melanie: 11 Georgie: 9 Tim: 7 Daisy: 5 Trevor: 3 The Inspector: 2 Sasha: 1 Elias: 1 Gertrude: 1 Arthur: 1 Eric: 1 Jordan: 1 Tessa: 1 Jess: 1
@jhumurroy6130
@jhumurroy6130 3 года назад
Thanks!
@minty7945
@minty7945 3 года назад
To be fair though, some of Jon's swears have been from statements and not directly from him. This comment is still a blessing though
@corycarver3121
@corycarver3121 3 года назад
@@minty7945 i considered only counting the ones he was saying as him but then i realized i would have to count a bunch of random statement givers and i cant put myself through that 😔
@rubyj3287
@rubyj3287 3 года назад
Okay, I couldn’t help myself, so here we go. *Jon* Shit: 9 (4 from statements) Ass: 15 (13 from statements) Fuck: 5 Bastard: 7 (All from statements) Arse: 4 (3 from statements) Dick: 2 (1 from statement) Prick: 2 (1 from statement) *Martin* Shit: 18 Fuck: 2 Bastard: 1 Arse: 2 Dick: 3 (1 from statement) Prick: 2 Bugger: 1 *Basira* Shit: 7 Fuck: 3 Arse: 1 Prick: 1 Bitch: 1 *Melanie* Shit: 5 Ass: 1 Fuck: 2 Bastard: 1 Arse: 2 *Georgie* Shit: 2 Fuck: 1 Bastard: 1 Arse: 1 Dick: 3 Bitch: 1 *Tim* Shit: 3 Ass: 1 Fuck: 3 *Daisy* Shit: 2 Ass: 1 Bastard: 2 *Trevor* Fuck: 2 Bitch: 1 *The Inspector* Fuck: 1 Tit: 1 *Sasha* Bitch: 1 *Elias* Shit: 1 *Gertrude* Bastard: 1 (from statement) *Arthur* Shit: 1 *Eric* Dick: 1 *Jordan* Bastard: 1 *Tessa* Ass: 1 *Jess* Shit: 1 Note that when I say something is from a statement, I mean statements other people gave that the character is reading aloud, not that character’s own statement. Also, taking that into account, that means Jon swore on his own only 15 times, meaning Martin is the character who has swore on his own the most.
@Ace_Up_My_Sleeve
@Ace_Up_My_Sleeve 2 года назад
@@rubyj3287 Damn, Martin has a dirty mouth, who would've thought? But seriously good job, everyone, for these detailed lists.
@TheNotoriousLARGE
@TheNotoriousLARGE 2 года назад
Hearing Martin repeatedly shouting "shit" over the sound of gunfire and bagpipes is one of the best things I've ever heard. I can't wait to get to that episode
@Chalkadoo
@Chalkadoo 2 года назад
So did you get there yet Papa?
@TheNotoriousLARGE
@TheNotoriousLARGE 2 года назад
Couple months ago. It was as great as I expected. Still haven't finished season 5 tho
@majjonga
@majjonga 2 года назад
@@TheNotoriousLARGE oh no I’m taking the duty to check up on you since you’ve probably finished it by now, are you ok?
@TheNotoriousLARGE
@TheNotoriousLARGE 2 года назад
@@majjonga Actually, I haven't finished it. I've been on episode 170/80-something for about two or three months
@bellringer53
@bellringer53 2 года назад
@@TheNotoriousLARGE welp get ready because 200 is a doozy
@katmhcharis1236
@katmhcharis1236 3 года назад
Again, I’m getting spoilers but in the most glorious way possible. Like Martin screaming “shit” over and over as Braveheart comes for them? Perfection.
@RainWelsh
@RainWelsh 3 года назад
I’ve just fucking lost it reading this. I didn’t even think about how weird it must sound out of context, but yeah. That’s Martin fleeing from the military band at an historical reenactment, while Jon tries to calm him down. God, my sides.
@alexandrajay2001
@alexandrajay2001 3 года назад
@@RainWelsh is it really a “reenactment” of people are actually fighting and dying?
@jhumurroy6130
@jhumurroy6130 3 года назад
@@alexandrajay2001 if it's similiar to a particular war then maaaaaaaybe?
@alexandrajay2001
@alexandrajay2001 3 года назад
@@jhumurroy6130 no it’s just a war in the middle of the apocalypse in the same location as a historical war
@jhumurroy6130
@jhumurroy6130 3 года назад
@@alexandrajay2001 Oh right, yes.
@yixuan9453
@yixuan9453 3 года назад
0:46 the small “nice” under 69, I see you
@kellanlevi5663
@kellanlevi5663 2 года назад
Season 1: 14 Season 2: 15 Season 3: 18 Season 4: 25 Season 5: 59
@rayethequeerdo
@rayethequeerdo 2 года назад
i may or may not have plotted these points on a graph the growth is exponential.
@ari638
@ari638 Год назад
@@rayethequeerdo I was gonna say, this would make for a beautiful exponential curve
@rayethequeerdo
@rayethequeerdo Год назад
@@ari638 the equation that closely matched it, if i did it right, was roughly y=2^x + 12
@notarobot1494
@notarobot1494 Год назад
@@rayethequeerdo how many swears is the next season gonna have lol
@rayethequeerdo
@rayethequeerdo Год назад
@@notarobot1494 according to the equation: 76
@buttermilk5870
@buttermilk5870 3 года назад
I was waiting for Martin's "bastard" because I knew it was going to hurt like a bitch
@cornboi612
@cornboi612 Год назад
Ikr
@lemin0u
@lemin0u Год назад
SAME
@atiredweeb8551
@atiredweeb8551 Год назад
Just finished episode 40 and hearing someone go "shit shit shit." While theres gunfire and fricking BAGPIPES playing in the background is hilarious
@endogeny2867
@endogeny2867 Год назад
MARTINS CONTRIBUTION TO SHIT WAS FUNNY HOMYGOSH
@maxschechter4156
@maxschechter4156 2 года назад
I love how it just ramps up in 163 for Martin out of nowhere
@Kaegri
@Kaegri Год назад
MAG #101 the muffled Jon swear took me off-guard omg asdjkfhdksgh also I wasn't even halfway through the video and realised it was already well into season 3/4 and thought season 4 must be really stressin' everybody out (I'm on s3) lol
@meganmantel2033
@meganmantel2033 2 года назад
My favourite part of this is that a large amount of the sh!ts were Martin in the span of 2 separate episodes
@JaamKidd69
@JaamKidd69 3 года назад
I love the variety of audio quality from statement to statement
@alexandrajay2001
@alexandrajay2001 3 года назад
this is my new favourite tma video, the addition of the blooper at the end really makes it
@novae9962
@novae9962 8 месяцев назад
Martin’s last “bastard” hurt
@avemflamma
@avemflamma 3 года назад
1:13 *sOBBING*
@lilliluna1410
@lilliluna1410 3 года назад
The music makes it so perfect
@Lane_11
@Lane_11 Год назад
Martin repeatedly saying shit in the one domain has never been as funny to me as it was in this context
@oh.worm.
@oh.worm. 3 года назад
this is so comprehensive thanks
@gaborpatai603
@gaborpatai603 3 года назад
Martin's Fuck Oooooff when he find's out how to quit. That still feeds me.
@chronicat
@chronicat 3 года назад
i never knew i needed that in my life, thank you
@evie-4062
@evie-4062 3 года назад
I’ve watched this for four hours now it’s beautiful
@pessoaaleatoria2586
@pessoaaleatoria2586 Год назад
Elias didn't died because of the stab, but because of the copious amount of cursewords his employees said
@m88nlighter
@m88nlighter 3 года назад
This is my new favorite thing in the tma fandom. Catch me making it my ringtone or some shit 😂
@jakupharrison8051
@jakupharrison8051 2 года назад
I also want this ringtone
@PharosWeirdward
@PharosWeirdward 10 месяцев назад
i didn't read the title, just saw the thumbnail, then just got jumpscared by martin
@silvershadow108
@silvershadow108 Год назад
This is just the internal thoughts of the characters as the series progresses
@rosanya-lasagnanimates
@rosanya-lasagnanimates Год назад
I was laughing my ARSE OFF the entire time
@eviem.6903
@eviem.6903 3 года назад
PLEASE IM CRYING
@panickednoodle
@panickednoodle 6 дней назад
Now to be completely fair, at least a few of Jon‘s were from statements and not actually his, but still!
@mayaclowes956
@mayaclowes956 3 года назад
this. is. a. masterpiece. i’m wheezing so muchhhh
@hannahstrashcan
@hannahstrashcan 11 месяцев назад
That second to last Bastard had me in sobs
@poptartzgaming5545
@poptartzgaming5545 3 года назад
YOU ARE A HERO JUST FOR THE EDITING
@ObviouslyOutlissa
@ObviouslyOutlissa 7 месяцев назад
The anticipation of watching the "tit" tick up to 1
@BrainsArt
@BrainsArt 3 года назад
Bless your damn soul for making this, I am crying laughing XD
@Cerise4697
@Cerise4697 3 года назад
im absolutely cackling
@citra1885
@citra1885 Год назад
This just made me want to watch the Archive even moreXD
@stephaniejade4706
@stephaniejade4706 Год назад
I think this may have been the best video I've ever watched hahaha
@lilliluna1410
@lilliluna1410 3 года назад
I saw this too many times
@9ofswords.267
@9ofswords.267 22 дня назад
i just started uncontrollably laughing halfway through
@mes6672
@mes6672 3 года назад
oh this is absolutely fantastic
@faxonii
@faxonii 3 года назад
this is so amazing
@io_online
@io_online 2 года назад
Music to my ears
@elliottmares1723
@elliottmares1723 2 года назад
I love that you had to make this 😂😂👌
@CurrentlyInTheSpiral
@CurrentlyInTheSpiral Год назад
Now do it with the Malevolent podcast
@kentonbaird1723
@kentonbaird1723 Год назад
Australian here..... Ahhhh, I feel right at home now~
@ayumihamano
@ayumihamano 3 года назад
that was beautiful.
@Luna-de_azule
@Luna-de_azule Год назад
I love them so much....
@ihavesnacks4186
@ihavesnacks4186 2 года назад
Episode 65: the first FUCK
@bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
@bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Год назад
ah this was wonderful
@meahrbenicxox
@meahrbenicxox 3 года назад
a masterpiece
@ametrime4754
@ametrime4754 11 месяцев назад
Wheres the beggining and end audio from? Some sort of interview or QnA? Im super interesteddd
@mahikakhanolkar517
@mahikakhanolkar517 9 месяцев назад
Does anyone remember who dropped the first f bomb 😂
@seeyouspacecowboy_98
@seeyouspacecowboy_98 8 месяцев назад
Wait, sorry, I’m American- “bugger” is considered a swear??
@weasel2939
@weasel2939 3 года назад
what Q&A is this from?
@V3xxe
@V3xxe Год назад
Who counts arse as swearing?
@JactheKnave
@JactheKnave 2 года назад
🤣
@ShrubRustle
@ShrubRustle 2 года назад
0:34 the interpretation of "mmph!" as "fuck" is so important to me
@cryptidnip
@cryptidnip 2 года назад
“YOULL SAY ‘BLIMEY’ AND YOULL BE GLAD OF IT! MAYBE A ‘DARN’ IF YOURE FEELING *LUCKY.* ”
@rebeccamiller1400
@rebeccamiller1400 3 года назад
Martin's last "Bastard" still hurts
@azulBjort_1406
@azulBjort_1406 2 года назад
Yeah......it just feels different from the rest
@mossbreen2091
@mossbreen2091 2 года назад
yeah
@cupcaketv5673
@cupcaketv5673 Год назад
Yeah :')
@Vgn1701
@Vgn1701 Год назад
Still crying
@ceaseless_spiral_avatar
@ceaseless_spiral_avatar 4 месяца назад
Knew it was coming, sobbed anyway
@tybaltia16
@tybaltia16 2 года назад
I'm so obsessed with the clips where someone is swearing while gagged so its a "mgngnf" counted as a fuck or whatever. incredible
@carbonatedcosmo7665
@carbonatedcosmo7665 Год назад
fun fact: jonny sims actually gagged himself for those bits and he did so by shoving as much of his own fist into his mouth as he could
@marifisk8278
@marifisk8278 Год назад
0:34 “[muffled feelings]”
@caseytaylor4896
@caseytaylor4896 2 года назад
Jon’s panicked “SHIT-“ from ep 78 is probably my favorite, I can’t remember the context for “FUCK YOU YOU SCRAWNY LITTLE TIT-“ KILLED me LMAO
@janzacharski2485
@janzacharski2485 Год назад
It sounded like Tim and I'm excited to get to that episode (am a first time listener and am only at MAG 43)
@siratlas8198
@siratlas8198 Год назад
@@janzacharski2485 well.. good luck soldier o7
@janzacharski2485
@janzacharski2485 Год назад
@@siratlas8198 thanks mate
@ari638
@ari638 Год назад
@@janzacharski2485 Good luck soldier! I take it you're going in blind right? How's it going so far?
@janzacharski2485
@janzacharski2485 Год назад
@@ari638 Yes I'm going blind and recently I have finnished the second season, and this is what I have to say about it's ending: Fuck you, Elias! Jurgen had so much information and you just went: "Brutal pipe murder time"
@fruitylittleman8025
@fruitylittleman8025 2 года назад
"our characters aren't particularly... swear-y!" says the man whose character swore the most
@mantislungs
@mantislungs Год назад
well to be fair a lot of that was just due to sheer amount of screen time his character had
@mello-by
@mello-by Год назад
I mean he is the main character
@atlander4204
@atlander4204 6 месяцев назад
All statement swears are in his voice, so yeah.
@solarianvoid-pi9428
@solarianvoid-pi9428 5 месяцев назад
Jonny did say he, personally, swears a lot and the main reason he had to tone it down is because Alex feared demonetisation because apparently faint-hearted Spotify doesn’t like swearing as much as Jonny 😂 That’s what I remember from the Q&A at least, which is, I think, also why Jonny immediately starts cackling as the question comes up
@D4wn0fAppl35
@D4wn0fAppl35 3 месяца назад
I mean, most of those were from statements
@willowisp254
@willowisp254 2 года назад
I haven’t seen season 5 yet but I heard the bagpipes and Martin knocking the counter up by 11 in like 5 seconds killed me
@beesare_cool
@beesare_cool Год назад
me knowing the context, it’s fucking hilarious. also, how are you doing so far?
@gallows_Calibrator
@gallows_Calibrator 2 года назад
Now, to their credit, prior to Season 5, most of these swears average to less than one per episode, and take place more often inside statements themselves. And after the events of Season 5 drop, I think they've earned some swear coins.
@uilsoum875
@uilsoum875 3 года назад
i feel like melanie contributed A LOT to that list
@kate-lynmayo5240
@kate-lynmayo5240 3 года назад
as is her right
@dhampir_days
@dhampir_days 3 года назад
I also think Basira and Daisy contributed a lot
@kl-1447
@kl-1447 3 года назад
Also tim
@yumiendercat3685
@yumiendercat3685 3 года назад
The fact that it was mainly Jon and Martin-
@atlander4204
@atlander4204 6 месяцев назад
@@yumiendercat3685 Martin was being chased by guns and bagpipes. Jon is being chased by everything else.
@InfiniteAnvil
@InfiniteAnvil 3 года назад
I love the way the counter just goes crazy on episode 163
@videokradio
@videokradio 3 года назад
the one with martin in the slaughter domain fucking got me
@parchmentengineer8169
@parchmentengineer8169 2 года назад
That's nearly one third of all swears from that category.
@beholdnonsense5100
@beholdnonsense5100 3 года назад
"You'll say blimey and be glad of it!"
@Pseudanon
@Pseudanon 3 года назад
“ maybe a “darn” if you’re lucky.”
@rorygiambalvo2955
@rorygiambalvo2955 3 года назад
Pretty sure the 69th swear is Martin saying "Fuck" right after Jon does and I don't know why I find that so important. It's like they're bonding.
@Galaxy-24
@Galaxy-24 Год назад
It's also the one where he realises his eye joke is actually the true ahaha
@rithumanoharan7098
@rithumanoharan7098 3 года назад
The 1 tit !! A true masterpiece thank you.
@alicepersson9568
@alicepersson9568 3 года назад
Very gay me, exitedly, as my gf with poland syndrome takes off her shirt:
@pewpew5467
@pewpew5467 3 года назад
i think it’s referring to the bird but this is funnier
@harleythegremlin8709
@harleythegremlin8709 2 года назад
@@pewpew5467 it isn't, someone called Jon a scrawny little tit
@pewpew5467
@pewpew5467 2 года назад
@@harleythegremlin8709 i know (i probably should’ve been more specific w my reply)
@harleythegremlin8709
@harleythegremlin8709 2 года назад
@@pewpew5467 oh damm just got what you meant, I'm disappointed now. I choose to believe it was profanity
@georgia860
@georgia860 3 года назад
Me the entire video: :D Me when I heard the last two bastards: D:
@chewweili2298
@chewweili2298 3 года назад
I MISSED THIS AT FIRST BUT THIS COMMENT MADE ME GO BACK AND NOW I'M CRYING AT ALEX'S ACTING. AGAIN.
@KingCanuck2814
@KingCanuck2814 3 года назад
0:49 PAUSE FOR BAGPIPIES
@ThatOneArchivist
@ThatOneArchivist 10 месяцев назад
I LOVE BAGPIPES
@ThatDuckSoup
@ThatDuckSoup 3 месяца назад
YAAAAS RHATNALGAWETWE THANK YOU
@brasstacks7398
@brasstacks7398 3 года назад
0:55 I LOVE how well Trevor's swears in 176 mixed with the music. Truly one of the greatest videos I've watched on this platform
@mothman5809
@mothman5809 Год назад
fucking, fuckin shit (dana nana na)
@vivkaupish7621
@vivkaupish7621 3 года назад
Alex: we try not to curse that much in this show Martin *getting shot at*: shit shit shit shitshitshitSHIT
@marcosgpaya1018
@marcosgpaya1018 5 месяцев назад
i mean it is a pretry good reason to say shit
@poets_and_books5523
@poets_and_books5523 3 года назад
I... Hearing this kind of out of context is the best thing ever😂
@seineevee
@seineevee 3 года назад
LMFAO
@DKHAKDHSJS
@DKHAKDHSJS 11 месяцев назад
oh yeah same, im in like, episode 19 lol
@elliotsmelliot
@elliotsmelliot 2 года назад
the “bitch” at 0:56 or so is in tune and that brings me joy
@Kounzi
@Kounzi 3 года назад
I appreciate the single ''tit'' thank you for your service
@maicey_t.
@maicey_t. 3 года назад
This is the INSTITUTE, DAMMIT! We have DECORUM!!
@dhampir_days
@dhampir_days 2 года назад
"SHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT" *loud sound of bagpipes*
@nateds7326
@nateds7326 3 года назад
Man the F Bombs really ramped up in season 5
@maxschechter4156
@maxschechter4156 2 года назад
I mean, given the circumstances, can you blame them?
@dhampir_days
@dhampir_days 3 года назад
british ppl be like you gotta be focking kidding *not sasha crashes in*
@Celestial_TaterTot
@Celestial_TaterTot Год назад
i love how the gagged Jon is just presumed to swear a few times
@hairspray242
@hairspray242 3 года назад
the REALLY sad 'bastard' :((
@brighidcampbell491
@brighidcampbell491 9 месяцев назад
😭
@cattrickie
@cattrickie 2 года назад
martin swears more than elias which i find incredibly funny
@TheScrybeOfTechnology
@TheScrybeOfTechnology Год назад
Probably because Jonah / Elias has his image as a professional to uphold
@Totallynotredtail
@Totallynotredtail Месяц назад
Martin probably has NOTHING on pre-jonah Elias though
@gvymamdvcnj131309
@gvymamdvcnj131309 2 года назад
Something about Jon saying bastard is weirdly satisfying
@tasmanianmagpie6056
@tasmanianmagpie6056 Год назад
I've seen maybe a handful of Magnus Archive episodes (I'm just really invested in the lore and some good friends of mine are fans) so hearing Martin at 0:49 and whoever at 1:01 is such a delightful and hilarious experience for me because I have NO idea what's going on
@seineevee
@seineevee Год назад
0:50 this must be wild to hear out of context
@Robin_Alcor
@Robin_Alcor 5 месяцев назад
I remembered when I did hear that while on season four and my god- I had not Fucking idea what was to come. Was so confused
@milobowhay2218
@milobowhay2218 3 года назад
youre doing the work nobody else will and this is literally amazing *SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT* me too martin. me too
@tired_tyro
@tired_tyro Год назад
idk what’s funnier, martins „SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIR“ or „SCRAWNY LITTLE TIT“… both make me giggle so much
@Elle-172
@Elle-172 3 года назад
"You'll say blimey and be glad of it!"
@justforfunentertainment7076
@justforfunentertainment7076 2 года назад
"Maybe a 'darn,' if you're _lucky_ ."
@thetasteofsunshine
@thetasteofsunshine 3 года назад
So much time must have been taken to make this and I applaud you deeply for this highly entertaining minute and thirty-seven seconds
@caz5800
@caz5800 3 года назад
The end, THE END "I might be and eldritch monster but that is unacceptable" hahahaha!!!
@sketchingchan
@sketchingchan Год назад
hi as someone who is only on... ep. 5 of s1 but is aware of like. a lot of stuff on tma lore (namely the chars and fears) i fear the day i reached the ep. where martin does a cluster f bomb over the sounds of gumshots and bagpipes-
@sketchingchan
@sketchingchan 10 месяцев назад
did. did past me seriously spelt guMshots instead of guNshots??? and didn't notice for like 7 whole months????? damn what the hell me
@atlander4204
@atlander4204 6 месяцев назад
@@sketchingchanhave you gotten to the gumshots and bagpipes in those months yet, tho?
@alisonlazarus5989
@alisonlazarus5989 3 года назад
Thank you for including *muffled feelings*
@glomp4146
@glomp4146 3 года назад
my god this is free therapy
@abaddonarts1129
@abaddonarts1129 Год назад
0:27 is my favorite, just the sudden "SHIT" sends me every time
@reluctantlysmol4274
@reluctantlysmol4274 Год назад
glad martin got the first "fuck"
@ЦукеЦукерберг
@ЦукеЦукерберг 3 года назад
0:37 "Bullshit!" "What bullshit?" "Bullshit fuuuuck!"
@quantumblauthor7300
@quantumblauthor7300 3 года назад
We have decorum.
@chronos5882
@chronos5882 2 года назад
Hahahahahahahahaha "fuck you, you scrawny little tit" I can't🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I weirdly don’t remember which scene that was from
@x_h_h6480
@x_h_h6480 3 года назад
This is a cinematic masterpiece
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