Expectations Cause Suffering | Ajahn Brahm | 24 June 2022 

In my younger years , I worked so hard to try and “ fit in “ ! All I got was unhappiness. Now I’m 66 and a recent cancer survivor and I’m happier than I’d ever been. Mostly because I don’t really care what others think of me. The cancer diagnosis eight months ago woke me up to Dhamma.

Dear Ajahn Brahm, you have not changed your teaching for years,-all about compassion, kindness and honor values. You keep your pure, sincere, and warm heart. 🎉Thank you for setting up an extraordinary sample of a leader.

These talks have been so helpful in my life, I am watching before I go to work. This has become a habit that has stuck with me. Such a wonderful group of souls you have at the Society. Thanks for all you do! 😊

Thank you for such a wonderful talk! ❤

All this craze about ASMR on RU-vid. Have you heard of these videos? They’re supposed to relax you and give you tingly sensations. But I find Ajahn Brahm’s videos the best ASMR videos available, and he doesn’t even tag them as such. The message is a bonus.

Thanks so much, it is always joyful to hear from Ajahn Brahm

The door of my heart ❤is open here in ct USA I live in a multi cultural area this morning im sharing Buddhism with a Dominican man and a woman from elsalvador. Im taking a field trip to Carmel NY to see amazing monestary this week.

Ajahn, this was a great dharma talk. Thank you so much. Sadhu. Sadhu. Sadhu. 🙏🙏🙏

He is my fav now.I’ve been binge watching Ajahn brahm to achieve this innate stillness… he is my hero 😊

Dear modern Father of Buddhism, l am learning meditation, and l feel listening to you is like meditating itself.

Thank you Ven. Ajahn Brahm for your very wise but entertaining talks. They always put my mind at rest as the words flow from your mouth like a gentle stream without any pre-planned script. That is so beautiful amazing🙏

Ahjan gives such inspiration so,so pleased that I discovered his chats on you tube, am now a daily avid listener. He is an Amazing Human being x

🙏🏼❤

I have been to Serpentine buddhist monastery ....and blessed enough to meet Ajan Brham...personally ....Namo Buddhaya

AJ is a gift to humans. It matters NOT where you came from; what MATTERS is where you GO. 🤲👀🤳

I am so grateful for your talks. Thank you.

Loved the three marriage rings!!! unrealistic expectation and trying to fit in by pleasing others causes us much suffering

So grateful 🙏🏼 May all being be happy

Love this talk. Thank you Ajahn Brahm!

Thank You for sharing your wisdom love and time.

Thank you from Minneapolis

Thank you! You touched my heart!

Because he cares. Monks see and they use their empathy. If her body (skin on her abdomen) was turning blue from the cold, it is natural to look and care. This is a parental feeling. Also, monks develop interoception, I think, which is sensing the body. Good health

I hope that if Ajahn Brahm or any of his friends read this that they know I mean it as a compliment rather than a criticism. I looked at his oldest videos from when he just came to Australia, I believe 12 or 13 years ago, and I think he has definitely become more effective and more mature speaker. I don't mean it at all about physical age. But I think there was something in him at that time that maybe seemed like he couldn't calm emotions very well. Now he is very good at this.

Good stuff

Thankyou🙏🏼

Thanks.

Spot on..I subscribed

Sadhu Sadhu Sadhu! 🙏🙏🙏

Healing Beauftial Video.

Sadhu Sadhu Saaaaaadhuuu ❤️

Thank you 🦋

🙏🙏🙏Sadhu….Sadhu….Sadhu…. Semoga semua mahluk berbahagia 🙏🙏🙏

" “The human mind is so stupid, it goes on expecting. It exists through expectations. It is a great moment if you can really drop all expectations. And when all expectations are dropped, then anything that you have repressed in the past will come back. You call them bad habits. Your very word, the choice of the word, says that you must have repressed them. You may not have been able to accept them, so you rejected them. Now when expectations are falling and you are becoming natural, all those rejected, disclaimed parts will again claim. They would like to be absorbed in your being. They are yours. You have been trying to forget them. You have been throwing them into the basement. But now, when you are becoming natural, they will say ‘Let us also come back home.’ So please don’t call them bad any more, otherwise you will again repress them. I’m not saying that they are going to remain with you. If they are really bad, they will disappear. You need not call them bad. A man who has no expectations cannot be bad. He can only be natural - and whatsoever is natural, is good. To be natural is to be good. They are synonymous to me. I don’t have any other idea of good beyond being natural. If your goodness goes against nature, it is bad. If your badness goes with nature, it is good. That’s what my morality is. That’s what my whole standpoint is. “Somewhere you have been wrong in your interpretations - calling something bad. If it goes with your nature, it is good - whatsoever it is. If it does not go with your nature, there is no need to repress it; it will drop on its own accord. Just be natural. By and by you will see that it is disappearing. Maybe it was there because you were repressing it. “This is the greatest thing that can happen to a person. It has happened. Your expectations are fulfilled. Now drop them! And just be natural. Love and enjoy life. There is no need to fight. And nothing is bad - maybe small human weaknesses, but nothing is bad. “This is my observation - that people who have a few human weaknesses are very good people. If you live with them, you will enjoy them. People who are inhumanly good are unbearable. You cannot live with them - they will crush you. Their very presence is ugly, heavy. They will turn you into a thing. Their very gaze will reduce you, and you will feel like a worm because their whole mind will be condemnatory."

Ty

Sadhu sadhu sadhu.

Wow, I used to get off the tube at Least Acton every morning to go to school, walked past the Scrubs to Clement Danes. We got beat up in White City.

Master Buddha

1:45 that's more about associations to positive feedback than expectations.

🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

🙏🏼💓🙏🏼

Supermonks!

🙏💐💐🙏🌝❤🇱🇰

How do I get the book, Open the Door of your Heart. I want, want, !!! a copy. Thank You. Smiley face.

What is the difference between a Hebrew, Jew, Zionist, Christian, Lutheran, Catholic, Sunni, Shia, Muslim, no one really knows and no one can explain. All people are the same and want the same things.

Good for them, let them wear whatever makes them happy. Is it Ajahn Brahm's place to make assumptions as to the reason they wore what they wore or that it caused them suffering? Also, he questions them trying to fit in and then makes a point about monks not fitting in. Monks may not fit in with the wider society, no more than many youth sub cultures, but, much like youth sub cultures, monks do fit in with other monks.

Acton Town behind the station 😂

His battle with own clothes makes me guess why so many people came to listen to him.

well… not every meditation teacher has to give up his family and become a monk… this answer I found a bit unrealistic… we are grateful that so many meditation teacher exist. even Jack Cornfield - very famous buddhist teacher - has a wife and can combine that… My advise would be he should build up his meditation teacher „job“ separately and when it’s his time he can be that fulltime… trust in the universe and your own journey 🙏🏻

Vedanta teaches bad karma can be undone

... hot here?

Why is a monk paying so much attention to what yong women in public wear though? Like, I don't know, don't look? But your discomfort with it either way does not, by default, mean THEY are "bad". You also assert they were "suffering". How would you know how they felt? Do you ask every woman you see, who's attire you don't approve of but can't seem not to notice, if shes "suffering", or do you just ASSUME it? Careful bhante.

Too bad you got lost in believing the commentaries are the teachings of the Buddha . Nimittas are pretty yeah sure it s just pretty traps … sama samadhi still has the 4 foundations of mindfulness except innthev8 th jhana . In samatha jhana no work can be done there is no contact … not the jhanas described by Buddha . He clearly said don t go there it s a dead end but people even clever monks still fall into this trap . How many of your monks have attained stream entry by practicing concentration ? You seemed to be a great monk thou hope you ll find your way back in the dhamma

02:24 You say the monks and nuns don't try to fit in but all of you copy each other entirely to where ts very ridiculous.

Sadhu sadhu sadhu 🙏

Sadhu Sadhu Sadhu 🙏🙏🙏