Fake Drug Stories w/ Nick Swardson 

Nick looking like Will Ferrells younger brother forgetting he is getting closer to that 50 hitter

When Theo says "I knew this one guy" its always a good story

Lol Nick goes, “ that explains a lot” 😂

I think Nick's contribution to movies is underappreciated he always has these crazy one liners that he just pops in and says that are hilarious.

“Is he a drummer at Chuck E. Cheese” LMAO 💀

When Nick said "that explains alot" after the cmo story

That 4 am post Theo on it 🥶💯

It’s great to see Nick back!

I dealt drugs for 40 minutes, but i couldn't handle the pressure and called the cops on myself 🤣

Yep that exposure to carbon monoxide sure does explain a lot with Theo.

Nick loves the word "Rogue".

when these two get to riffing !!!! too much verbal fun !!!!

“broke in to golf course”, walked on to a golf course*

The grilling is Huge! lol... In the middle of that back and forth, no bueno my friend... lol

I need to stop listening to theo when I am eating, now I gotta clean chili off the wall

" That Explains Alot" 🤣

Theo “never let guests talk” Von

Theo's up early or up late? Hope you're doing good wherever you are. 😊

Drummer for Chuck-E-Cheese is on my verbal bucket list now

I can't get over the fact that Theo looks like a Trailer Park Tom Brady.

We sat at parties a bunch of little girls and cut up lines of pixie sticks and snorted them 😳😂 80's kids were built different lol and I still can't believe how easy it was to get drugs in the 90's anything anytime anywhere and being girls we never had to pay for anything, guys just gave us stuff. Crazy times, back then you called the rave hotline and got an address and it was always some abandoned building or field somewhere. Once it was by an overpass and ended up being a huge circle of people just taking turns going in the middle and doing the best shuffle combos they could do while throwing around glow sticks or hula hoops. Or on most nights you could just look for spotlights in the sky follow them find it and that was always a rave. The nineties were the best 😭

The fake guy that buys stories and trys to convince people it's his own

Riley Mau’s college “shroom” story is literally almost identical to something that happened to me. I wonder how often homeless dudes sell dried portabellas to unsuspecting college kids?

Thes two could name every cool strain of weed I’d roll up. Booty moss and Camomeel Feel.

Why tf did he look at the camera like that at 3:58 😂

I remember selling oregano, tea, and cat nip to a few people back in the late 90s 😂

That explains a lot of it!!!

Ohhhhh Theo should get one of his childhood wild friends on the podcast man that would be awesome. Everybody spread that message man.

I didn’t understand half of that shit but it was still hilarious.

Ditch weed by the railroads is the OG SOUR DESIEL

This is so nostalgic

“That explains a lot”

We used to cut fake acid strips out of crazy picture designs. Shit looked like fire 10 strips.

What blows my mind is I did the tea thing as a kid too lol

Sold salt as coke 😂 lmao 😅 easiest 40 bucks ever

Omg I was like that when I was young 🙄 I live near the golf course we used to go run around at lol.

Lol I had a kid I’ve had him smoking cat nip and gave him a bag of it and my dad found it lol

I remember one of my local dealers sold someone the black window sealer shit wrapped in cling film as hash to some 15 year olds 😭😭

Buddy's in 8th grade walking Mill ave in the 90s by ASU. Bought some bunk acid, walked up to the top of ASU mountain, my friend just shaking his head left an right saying look at all the lights streaking across city.

Soo why are we just now uploading a clip from a podcast that’s almost 200 episodes old…? He just released ep. 378 - this clip is from ep 195 - almost 3 yrs old. Plz explain lmao

I had a buddy that grew Amanita Muscaria mushrooms which weren't illegal. He bundled them up in sacks, threw labels (with a history and lore of "The Alice in Wonderland" shroom, AND a "NOT for Human Consumption" warning in each sack) and started his Empire. We'd been writing songs together and playing open stages with great success, and cut a demo. He'd played fiddle for "The New World Youth Symphony Orchestra" and had played for the Queen, the Pope, the President... All over the World by age 16. He also shredded like a monster. He was 18 and sold to his friends, mostly. His girlfriend's "BFF" wigged out one night on them and went home speaking Caterpillar, I guess, where her mom found the left over polka-dots in her purse. The girl cracked and told where she got them. The next day my buddy got raided. They confiscated his supply and hauled him to jail. In court, his lawyer was like, "I got this." "Your honor, please note that according to State Law, the Amanita is NOT illegal! Please refer to Exhibit A... The SAFETY LABEL my client put in each bag...". The labels had been removed from each baggie. They charged him with "Dealing a Look Alike Substance". And postponed sentencing. His lawyer apologized and said, "They got us. They'll give you a year, most likely." He told me he would die if he went to jail. He committed suicide a couple days later with a swan dive from a 7 story window into an alley. Left a note, too, mentioning if he was needed to look in India where he was to be reincarnated as a cow that people cared about. The district manager of Starbucks had loved our duo and we were in talks of being a "Company Band"... Travel to different Starbucks for tours, our CDs played in the stores and a rack next to the registers of Starbucks everywhere... C'est la vie.

I’m straight crying 🤣

Well it does have catechins and caffiene so you might have felt SOMETHING atleast from the caffiene

I used to roll up them horse leg hitters full of dill weed bruh. Straight dill weed with my bro Rishi riding bikes in the bunny trails ripped on Dill. Like, the damn spice son. From our moms goddamn spice rack.

Theo is so funny that he makes other comedians less funny and totally blows their confidence. Rogan actually gets so irritated that he can't hang w Theo and even sabotages his jokes.

best story

"And then Weed came out."

that explains a lot lmfao

My buddy and I smoked oregano and spices in like 5th grade 🥴💨

In the south they smoke catalpa leaves

BOOTY MOSS!!

Funny, yet disturbing. Never thought to smoke " not weed " and pretend to be trashed. We couldn't get it at that age and everyone knew it. Knew guys that had some but they were dickheads and wouldn't share.

Theo Von seems like the kind of guy that would sell oregano to a 5th grader as weed and then beat his @ss for talking sh!t about his product to the other kids.

You guys did get high, it was the placebo effect

Yeah but what about Ricky?

Bertend , Joffrey, theo vernacular

Keep doing it Mr.Von

English breakfasted 💨 Sucks to be Joffrey

nick cant keep up with theo's comedic genius in this podcast. sad little man.

Meta. Fake story about something fake.

I smoked tea too, when i was 13yo 🤣🤣🤣, NOT good

Cmo leak🤣

Just casual carbon monoxide poisoning

Lmao

Nick isn't adding anything to the conversation..

Has this guy ever been funny?