For me forgiveness is one thing and forgetting is another. Most times when I forgive someone, it’s hard to forget totally. So every time I remember instead of dwelling in the pain and “hating” on the situation all over. I just pray for my heart and pray for the person.
I believe forgiveness is a journey. As a Christian, it still takes praying for your heart to able to let go fully because honestly it’s not easy all the time. In a way, I think cutting people off could mean you’re trying to put boundaries in place and protect your space and yourself from being hurt again especially if the person is someone that could possibly do that again(especially if it’s a case where you’ve confronted the person and it didn’t help things in any way and you were still hurt again by the person). However I believe everything balls down to “motive” and the state of our heart. So I believe it’s a thing of what the motive is for cutting off or state of our heart for forgiveness.
As much as forgiveness is a journey, it is also a process. The party that was hurt will need all the time to process the hurt and take time to reflect on what has happened. before forgiveness comes around, people process in different ways as well.
Sometimes you forgive someone and for your own good, you set strict boundaries and the individual doesn’t have access to you like they did before. Even to the point of not necessarily inviting them to events like before. And YESSSS sometimes is not the act but the disappointment in the person. That’s why we hear people say things like if it was someone else that did xyz I won’t be angry…
But you see that friendship hurt ehnnn, hmmmmmm . I experienced it a while ago, and trust me it was too painful, This person in question gave me the opportunity to explain myself but i decided not to explain anything not because i did not want to patch things up with this person , but because she had cut me off before making the decision to let me explain myself. In the long run , it was sooo painful , we don't talk anymore but i genuinely wish them the best, i try to wish them well in little ways that i can.
Everyone feels forgiveness is easy but in the real sense, it is very hard. While we are admonished and mandated to forgive, forgetting the deed is way harder. You can forgive and give them space. However, if the offender is in a state of sobriety, acknowledges the offence and seeks for forgiveness and turn a new leaf, there might be a second chance for the person to rewrite the mistakes. Above all, we should learn to extend grace to people and I loved the fact that you spoke on the issue of married folks unfriending their unmarried friends. I hope they learn and do better. Please, follow, like, subscribe and turn on notifications to get updated when she drops a video. Well-done for the great content you put out week in, week out. 👏👏👏👏
For me, forgiving comes easier than forgetting… There will always be moments, conversations, or situations that bring back memories of what happened🤷🏾♀️.
Thank you for this. The disappointment usually makes it sort of hard to forgive the person. May God give us the grace to be able to forgive those who trespassed against us.
I think a question that might be helpful is, how do you handle forgiveness with your spouse or sibling vis-à-vis friends and acquaintances? Do you cut your spouse off? So here is the thing, forgiveness is the means to the end and eventually letting go. Remember that we are humans and it’s more burden on the ‘hurtee’ than the ‘hurter’ (hope there are English words like that😅)
😂😂you have successfully invented two new words. I think the bond and manner of family relationships makes it different from how we handle acquaintances and friends. Somehow I know my spouse and siblings won’t intentionally hurt me but can’t exactly say the same of some friends.
