I love you both dearly for trying to help married couples to endure in their marriage! But is always helpful to look for the originator of marriage for directions! And His advice always worked when applied. This Biblical advice in Ephesians 5:28,29 and verse 33 has helped millions of people to improve their marriages! So, if we are humble enough to apply His loving advice, our marriage will be be truly successful!
Firstly, i laughed so hard because I sometimes run into the same problem, trying to explain to my American wife a certain way I use the English language.
Someone said to walk away…. I have to comment on this.. God never told us we wouldn’t have trials and tribulations. I think growth requires pressure. You just don’t leave your job because of a disagreement and keep changing jobs! Sometimes people don’t know how to endure because they never work through anything. It’s not a one size fits all but I think when it comes to marriage it’s important to exhaust all measures and persevere through the hard times. That’s the whole purpose of vows. Marriage is not easy and it’s important to recalibrate the relationship and have open communication ❤ I pray the couple looking for support continues to be blessed and lord brings them wisdom and understanding ❤❤
@ Walking Ministries.....When my husband &I got married (we are true Christians) we believe that when we met,it was and is JESUS CHRIST that brought us together for a reason...not for nothing. When we fell in love, it wasn't just for last. WE were only together once before we were married. We waited 2yrs before we married. Honestly, it was the best thing we did. People out there just want sex and don't think of their future together after marriage. You need to Wait&Want each other. My husband and I NEVER EVER SAY THE D-WORD. N-E-V-E-R!!!!!!. If you do,you are then putting that into your hearts. I find those people not only sad that they cannot talk to each other & work it out,but we quiet literally pitty those types of people who don't have the intelligence to think logically. 🤔 When you get married, you marry ONCE. PERIOD. If you think otherwise, then you obviously don't have the brain power to THINK OF WHAT MADE YOU 2 FALL IN LOVE IN THE FIRST PLACE. IF WHAT MADE SOME IDIOTS GET MARRIED WAS LUST,THEN YOU PROBABLY SHOULD NOT BE LIVING.
See finish is a Nigerian term for taking someone for granted because you have access to them or because you know them closely. In professional cases, it means crossing a boundary.
Wow! This is the first comment/the one showing on top as I'm scrolling. I'm not Nigerian, so, thank you for the very precise and clear explanation. I hope all non-Nigerians read your comment. Thank you again. This is perfect.
I was married for 6½ years and it failed when I least expected it. It's not easy to be married and requires a lot of effort. I discovered you guys after it broke down and I've followed your videos and learned a lot. I made too many mistakes and I've learned from them. I'm just praying that I can restore what I lost. Thank you 2 so much for sharing your life with us. You have no idea the impact you're making in my life.
Positive direction is where u heading ! U r bold to look back & admit ur mistakes, that is how u grow,because when u know better u do better .Keep doing the work as u prepare urself ready to marry again. By God's grace the next one will be enjoyable because u did the work. Marriage is not a joke, but if u have the tools, U can conquer all the challenges Be bless & safe.🙏🏻
Professor Lamb has spoken! Wow, you are engaging when you speak! My husband and I have been married 18 yrs, but I remember when we had been together a very short time, I had to put the brakes on things, cause I noticed something. My husband is a very pleasing man, and loves to please me often. And he is excellent at what he does, and I love it when he does. BUT, I noticed when we did things as often as he wanted, it DID get boring! And quickly! Which surprised me! We tried experimenting with different things, but even still, the desire to WANT to, wasn't there. So I suggested we not do it as often, and at first, he really didn't like that idea, but after trying it, it really worked for the DESIRE TO WANT TO. It automatically made us both desire one another even MORE, and left that weird feeling of boredom at the door. Men are ready all the time, because it's a physical act for them, but for most women, it's a physical AND emotional act, and we just don't want to ALL THE TIME. The pressure of it for a woman is especially taxing, because we have a lot going on down there, and trying to keep it a hundred, 100% of the time, for daily activity is next to impossible. So this method also works for women who have "issues" to have time to fix things, and not be so stressed over how her man is going to find things. I hope I'm not being too graphic. Most men don't care, I know my husband doesn't, but women can be embarrassed and stressed about normal body functions, and that can ruin the moment in itself. It also allows you to do and enjoy other things as a couple other than just sex all the time, which is nice. There's just something about it. And to this day, EVERY TIME is like heaven...for both of us...🥰😘
Well said.Spoken like a woman with experience and wisdom.It's true,we women don't always want it but men are always ready for it and some of them don't know how to get you in the mood (foreplay).
Lamb: "See finish is like see finish na, you dunno see finish?" 🤣😂 See finish means familiarity. With familiarity comes the tendency to take something for granted. See finish is Nigerian pidgin translation directly saying one has seen all there is to see/ "finished seeing everything" about a person. Great tips there. My little addition is for the person to also COMMUNICATE the problem with their partner.
Married for 43 yrs and been through a lot but it all passed. I promised to stay with my marriage because I love my husband, not because he is perfect but we both accept our weakness and strengths. There was a point that we want to separate but with our Pastor’s help we managed to communicate and made decisions together. You have to remember what you love about each other and not the worst. My advice is read the book Men is from Mars and Women from Venus. Don’t ever compare your Spouse to anybody else. Above all we Put God first in our lives.
43 yrs, you are blood relatives. No need to separate because you have seen everything you dont like about each. Why start with somebody else - it will require too much energy and emotional drain🤔
See Finish a word commonly used by speakers of Nigerian Pidgin, to represent a situation where a person loses or has lost respect from one or more people, due to prolonged proximity. That small boy no dey respect me again, na see finish de worry am
Sparks comes and goes. It's part of a relationship. Up and down, good not so good, warm and cold. Marriage is no bed of roses. Pass through difficult times you get rewarded like everything in life.😁. I have been married for over 18 years now and our spark got back stronger 3 years ago.
Hi I'm Lisa from South Africa, married for 27 years When you married never let your guard down, always look sexy, respect is also the key, God created men to be more attractive to someone who respect them, on the other side we attracted to someone who love us or show genuine love
Hi, am Seyi from Nigeria, I can attest to your comment, married for 5years, and I realised that when ever I compare my spouse with someone else, I begin to see faults on his part, forgetting that humans are not the same.
Sometimes you just have to look within yourself to find, that it is not your partners responsibility to make you happy or satisfied. They play a role in your space. But, how you receive and observe the situation truly depends on where you are emotionally, spiritually and mentally. If you not in a good place with yourself, you won’t be able to be in a good place with your partner. Your happiness is in with you! Start there💜
Very true !! Sometimes you also have to look at yourself internally. Most issues are within ourselves. And we just have to be willing and ready to put in the effort . Blessings 💟
Let me help Lamb with see finish 😂. See finish is like taking someone for granted because you've seen and known basically everything about them. So when someone says "you don see me finish" it means you've known about me so much you now take me as a joke. Sometimes the expression is on a light mode for example with a friend and sometimes it can be said out of anger depending on the tone of voice.
My marriage will be 5yrs this year. We lost our spark very early but along the way, we found it and it's even better than our courtship days. When I heard the question, I was trying to put my finger on what we did and I must say you both nailed it. You literally put into words the things that we did. But I'll add two more. 1. Remove from your mind, words or thoughts the possibility that either of you is walking away, decide that you're in it for the long haul. This helps you avoid the temptation for unhealthy options. 2. Communicate with each other, have real conversation about the real issues. There is a wide way to apply the tips already shared in the video, but communication helps you identify the best way to apply it in your situation for best results. To the person that asked the question and anyone else in similar situation, I just want to encourage you not to give up because there is potential for it to get a lot better 😘😘🤗🤗🤗
I love the way you guys answer questions its an exhibits to your answers the love , respect, playfulness and the boundaries all come into place showing the contentment respect and support for each other in public. I believe burning fire or fire not burning in marriage if there is contentment respect and support on both sides that fire should be blazing
You guys literally touched on some of the critical issues. Sometimes though allowing the pressures of daily living take away the spark. Being blessed with children will sometimes also take away the spark too because those moments together is missing. Create time away from those pressures and enjoy each others company.
See finish explanation weak me🤣🤣 Ling, see finish in Nigeria is when you have seen/known everything about someone to the end. Then you start taking them for granted 😂 That's "See Finish" in 9ja
Hey guys I hope that you and everyone watching has an amazing and blessed Sunday ❤🥰🙏 Being in a 18yr relationship it sometimes happens but it's important to do things to get it back whatever that is for you and your spouse.
People forget to continue to do for each other what they were doing in the beginning that aroused the attraction towards each other. They doesn't just mean keep up the intimate stuff. Couples forget how to communicate with each other, chase after each other, date each other, surprise each other, be spontaneous with each other, praise each other, feed each other's souls mentally and spiritually. We must also learn how to miss each other with time apart from each other for ourselves doing self care or things alone. We do that in our relationship and it has continued to work for ten years. We surprise each other by sitting down and having real conversations about our feelings without one of us trying to fix the issue or judgment. We pray for each other. We date each other. And surprise each other with the little unexpected things still to this day. Never forget that all of this is possible and still needed always for a successful marriage and life together. It's not easy to keep a love. Especially a type of love like a 1st Corinthians type of love as promised in the bible.
Man! For a minute there, I thought y’all were talking about yourselves.Peace and blessings for the couple that is going through a tough time.May God bless your relationship.
I love this conversation because it is a touchy subject for many married couples and those who have invested into a relationship period. I think in some ways it’s harder for the ones who have children involved. But you both made great points to consider. Also, could we please make videos like this longer?!??? Please & thank you!
We have to remember that love and sparks are just parts of a marriage as there are other components like honour, respect, friendship, etc. Love is not merely an emotion but a principle of commitment so even when we fee the emotion or spark is fading we still have to be committed and value the other components. Seek counselling,etc work harder to bring things back to the way they were when you had the sparks.
Ling and Lamb, I appreciated how you both handled this important question. Many give up and run once the spark is gone. I like the idea of "never stop liking your partner." This is what can keep things going when things are rough, because you like the person with whom you are going through the challenge. ❤❤
Great explanation! We all have our opinions on how it will or can work and it’s great we all collaborate collectively on this. Personally speaking, I’m 34 and being in a relationship for 13 years/married for 5 years. You can get bored of the same thing and it’s ok to switch it up. A marriage/relationship is not a walk in the park so as a couple you first need to take care of yourself and feel good, because you can’t rely on someone to make you feel good if you don’t feel good about yourself. Then I would say communication, make sure you find ways to communicate with each other. You should be able to converse openly without fear of being put down for expressing yourself. Always respect each other in the process. I would also say patience. Patience with your partner is so important. Patience with them on letting them find themselves and be able to work on themselves while loving you at the same time. Sometimes while working on your self your partner can loose patients and gain frustration. And lastly just love each other throughout the process. Love has it’s trials and tribulations, in order to conquer the battles we must love each other through the process and understand we all are flawed. And, despite the flaws we will still come out loving each other harder and stronger ❤
Wow, Ling is so understanding and accepting. She doesn’t dismiss Lamb even when she’s never heard “see finish. She even tries to explain what “see finish” means for Lamb. I think this shows a very good side of her.
Great job in answering the question guys. I would really love Lings parents to answer this question since they have been together for such a long time❤
It's unveiling the finished look for date night. You two are so wise. Live, love and laugh together. We are blessed to witness the depth of your relationship 💜🙏🏽👍🏽👌🏽
Adoring and loving couple. Have to say the major key to your successful marriage is your faith in god and runs deep in the family with your daily prayers. Second most important is to never lose respect and embrace your differences abd value each other as a one of a kind individual Create romance by trying new things, so life does not become an everyday routine Write simple love notes, post on the fridge for example, or put it in his or her pocket Dont be in each others neck and throat constantly, give each other breathing room and space And last but not least, learn to forgive and if possible forget and dont lose respect to each other. Life goes where energy flows! Pour your life with love and energy, and charge yourself with prayer and appreciation and gratefullness for all that god has nourished and granted you. Get close to god, to experience real love, when you do, then you exude love and compassion without feeling deprived for less attention from your partner.
Lamb said, 'when you see somebody finish' 😂😂😂😂😂😂, ling said 'finish what?' 😂😂😂😂😂😂. English no easy my brother oo. Love you guys and nice points about the question raised.
Sometimes it’s refreshing to go out of town spend a wkend at a hotel. Make reservations on a boat for dinner. They do have them at the harbors and it’s not expensive it’s just different and romantic. Do something you’ve never done before like give him a face scrub or even a manicure/pedicure a massage. Yeah spice it up!😊
Tbh, Lamb is just a big brother you'll wish to have and Ling is just the kinda of woman you'll always pray to have as a wife. They've both set a standard for relationship that people will always come to RU-vid just to seek advice from them and I believe it has definitely been God keeping them strong together, love you both. And not all Nigerian English can be completely expressed in the normal English language, just like see finish
Marriage shouldn’t just be based off sexual intercourse because after that subside, then the marriage will fail. Essentially, if persons are truly in love they will not get tired of each other, unless the relationship is based off only sex, $$$ etc. Again, real love isn’t about sex especially because even a prostitute can offer sex to anyone or everyone.
I totally agree, the foundation should be friendship and liking each other 1st and foremost. My husband and I were best friends before we got married and still are today because we not only love each other but we like each other as well.
This post is definitely coming from a person that is either not married, Matured or is just not thinking. Firstly Sex, Money, Friendship, Respect and even more are all the things that makes up a Very Happy Marriage. And even with all these things there are times you feel like ur loosing ur spark for eachother and that mostly comes with alot of things, work stress, Financial stress, kids, can also b a contributing factor, some women after giving birth can focus more on the child needs more that the husband, and some husband can b insensitive and react in an unpleasant way, alot of things However, it's always advisable for you n ur partner to still put in efforts to please each other and never stop dating each other. Try new things, go on a vacation, have goals and more.
@@UNSCRIPTEDSHAWNRAY WE ALL HAVE OPINIONS; THEREFORE, your failed attempt to tell me about myself is actually immature & ludicrous especially because my comment doesn’t call for a personal verbal attack of me, a total stranger. YOU ARE, INDEED, OBLIVIOUS ABOUT MANY THINGS BUT IF YOU WANT TO FLATTER YOURSELF WITH YOUR OPINIONS KEEP ON DOING SO; HOWEVER, PLEASE STOP GETTING OFFENDED BY OTHER PEOPLE’S OPINIONS THAT ARE BASED OFF THEIR CULTURE, LIFE EXPERIENCES ETC. ALL THE BEST. Peace & ❤️.
@@UNSCRIPTEDSHAWNRAY Notably, my comment was made from the perspective of a marriage that’s based off “solely” LOVE; therefore, if a woman is married to a man and for some reason his 🍆 stopped working she wouldn’t or will not leave her husband because the marriage was/is based off love; not material acquisitions, a working 🍆, physical aesthetics etc. Marriages in America don’t work these days because people are too focused on conditional love aka fake love. Can you imagine being married to your spouse and your spouse leave you after you meet in a car accident, is that the kind of “IMMATURE” love you desire, so much that you saw it fit to label someone as immature for advising others to seek real authentic love? Let’s think critically here…🤔🤔🤔
😀😃🙂 Lamb!!!! Why are you this way!! I lost it @ "see finish" 😀. Love you guys loads loads loads! And Lamb thanks for representing us Nigerians soooo well. Our mannerisms, our language, our vibe! Ling! Love you
I enjoyed this conversation today. You gave me a lot to think about and you know what I think everything you’re saying is very true. You have to continue to be friends with one another continue to love the person that you first met, and even though you have disappointments and relationships. We still gotta be in the relationship together and always remember the first love our friendships our true talks with one another.❤🙏🏾
Commitment takes more than a spark... Literally, a spark is only for a moment and I've learned that it will not always be there. It takes commitment to stick with someone regardless the passage of time. And yea, what Lamb says about friendship is very important. Listen.
See finish is like the person has taken you for granted. They have become too familiar that the other person has started taking you for granted, no more respect
1. Your spouse must always be your number 1! Do not forget this basic rule. Be a united front, that can never be separated by any one else! And do not take your misunderstandings, worries, fights etc. outside your house! This does not mean that you cannot have communication with others, but you have to be a united entity! And the above applies to both partners!
"See finish" is the act of loosing Value for each other in marriage or relationship, then boredom sets in,and finally it ends in disrespect, so they must makes sure they both hold on to the inestimable value of what they both share. LOVE. As long as that relationship has lost its Value,the relationship is practically Dead.
I love the way Lamb still loves, craves and hungers for you so much Bambi! Having been married twice I can only say that being friends is vitally important. Never ever lose the sense of humor you started off with. 😃
I love being single but love watching happy couples. I tried being married and it wasn't for me. I wish people would take vows seriously because marriage is alot of work. God Bless you both.
Happy Sunday morning 🥳 It's always good to see you guys on Sunday mornings. Good advice for married couples. I love the fact that not only do you guys love each other but you continue to LIKE each other and that requires working on your relationship Daily. 👏👏
Upon how serious this conversation is, I still laugh my ass at the end 😂😂😂😂.. Not lamb trying to express himself of what see finish means, in a better understanding. And still ended up saying See finish is like when you see finish na 😂😂… Lamb ooh 😅
THIS IS LIFE Y'ALL...for the ones struggling, for the ones preparing themselves for dating and also for the ones who are "perfectly fine" as long as we ALL are mindful of this wisdom well succeed in our relationships! THANK YOU LING AND BAMBI
Lamb and Ling, you guys cracked me up so good this morning with that last piece of looking for a better word to say what you want to say. And I think you were looking for the term; "seen it all ". I think that is what you were trying to convey with that "see finish ". Thank you for the presentation.
The “see finish” got me rolling on the floor😂. She finish like when you see somebody finish 😂😂 Ling.. explain the see finish in English 😂 when she does not even know what it means.😂
I totally understand you Lamb See finish is not to take the other person for granted or it can also mean familiarity. Love you so much Ling and Lamb. Much love from🇬🇭🇬🇭
Mmm in this regard it simply means, any of the partners have seen it all or experienced it all and therefore not enthusiastic about each other anymore.
This is great advice, YES marriage is between 1 man and 1woman. Communication is so important in marriage because if one party feels that they're missing out on something, they need to communicate to work on building back up what's missing together.
Ling is too intelligent. See how she summarised the take aways from both of you. That point of losing spark in a relationship is what I always think about assuming I get married. But there are two or three points from this video. Kudos.
Looolll, lamb says " you don't know see finish? English is hard o" See finish means taking someone or something for granted or getting too comfortable or used to something. To add to your points, I was thinking communication. Having a heart to heart with your partner on where and how each of you are dropping the ball might help. This also brings me to a question, how do you handle a partner that's unwilling to communicate?
No relationship is always on pink Clouds. You will fall in love with your partner again and again. It goes up and down in a way. But you have to have a common foundation. Respect, communication and a deep love for eachother. Look at what you fell for and be patient with eachother✌🏼🥰
See finish is when you’ve known so much about a person….the good and the ugly; you tend to treat them less because now you have seen their worst moments, and weaknesses. So Lamb says don’t see finish, meaning even when you’ve seen the worst of a person, still treat them like you used to when you haven’t seen the ugly side of them. Don’t treat them less because you now know their weaknesses. I hope I made sense. 😁
These were some of the most realist advice I have heard in years ,applying your own personal experiences just topped it of perfectly, keep loving each other the way you do ok ,lamdo you on point big brother...
Love you guys so much, you give me joy every time I watch your series, my advice is this. Every relationship has its mystery it is that mystery that keeps the relationship alive, think of it from when you were dating what made you fall in love with the lady or man was the interest you had in them, and now In the marriage, you have to hold on to that it is thinking you now know all about your partner that brings the fire down, you guys are still the same amazing people you were when you started dating and you need to hold on to this mentality of love, forgiveness, and mystery.
Love is a principle not based on feelings. Happiness is a choice that comes from within not based on external influences…be intentional in all you do not out of obligation or duty!❤
I love his advice he took the relationship apart and put it back together I love that and before this couple gives up get help counseling always helps with prayer great observations
Been dating for 2.5 years now and currently going through a lot of emotional roller-coaster in my relationship. Watching your videos not only give me some comfort and hope but also it teaches me about how to become the bigger and better person in my relationship. I realized there is so much that my girlfriend and I need to learn about each other and relationships in general as we navigate our problems, and God willingly we will reach to a safe compromise.
"See finish" in English means when you don't longer have respect for that person anymore it may be you with that person for so long so you don't longer condone that person or have respect for he/her
Communication is key! Are both parties willing to talk and work on the problem. And definitively both parties need to continue to date EACH OTHER! The things that attracted you to each other are still there but life might have gotten try to go back to what you loved about each. & take care if yourself so that you love yourself because if you don’t live yourself you can’t love someone else.
Communication is also key. If the communication is there, they would be able to talk out their issues. My wife and I talked for weeks before we ever laid eyes on one another. This gave us time to know more about each other and like one another before we saw a physical attraction. We became great friends long before we became lovers. We are best friends and there are few people in the world that would turn away from a best friend, so why do we turn away from a spouse, if we tell a bff everything, why not our spouse? We should always invest more in the one we choose the rest of our lives to be with.
😅😅"See finish" simply means over familiarity...in a derogatory way though. It happens when one of the partners has NOTHING going on(which in most cases isn't the actual situation, but just a perception from the other person), due to the way they presented theirself . When someone "sees you finish" then they assume you have NOTHING more to show (in terms of value, growth ...) Then disregard and disrespect kicks in. The relationship or friendship becomes unhealthy.
Very interesting topic. Thank you for sharing. Having been married for 22 years + which is nothing compared to others I feel that this topic is an important one. It will happen to us all. Even Michelle Obama described difficult years. My small 2 cents of advice is to do everything you can to ensure you are able to laugh everyday either by yourself or together. Being able to laugh is an amazing antidote to sometimes wanting things that you may have to extend an extra ordinary amount of patience even if you feel you are entitled. I think this is what attracts me to Ling and Lamb. Their ability to laugh. This is priceless and something to be protected at all costs. Tuning in from 🇬🇧.
See finish meaning you have gotten too familiar with the person so much that you don't regard the person as much as used to any longer. :) Thank you for sharing Ling and Lamb.
What does she mean by satisfied? Everything in relationships has a range (ex. 1-10). Whatever you GIVE in a relationship SHOULD BE RECIPROCATED. And if you’re not getting that, then you TALK about it; break things down. Start with the smallest issue and then go from there ❤!
What makes marriage to work is spontaneity ,unpredictable, and surprising. What I mean by that is don't wait for the man to bring you flowers you get something he like and surprise him. When my boyfriend of 8 years went abroad for work, on his return, I know he can take a taxi and come home, and doesn't expect me to come to the airport but when he sees me there with a single red rose waiting for him it lit up his face. It's the little things. The effort to be a bit unpredictable(not in a bad way) also helps. Get to know ,value, and savour each other a little at a time. Take time.
I think what Lamb was trying to maybe say with “seen finish” was to don’t let your intentions to just be to use a person or suck them dry and use all their good just to leave them. Don’t have them investing their good into you all for you to take it for granted or to not value them. I think. Something along those lines. They did all that hard work to get you and keep you and show love, don’t lose someone and a valuable union over something as minute as spark.
“see finish” a term in Nigerian slang that refers to over familiarity of someone which leads you to take them for granted. Like when you have known everything about a person inside out and you don't see anything special or noteworthy in them anymore.
“See finish “ is a pidgin slang for over-familiarity, lack of value for a person, For example; when someone says you’ve seen them finish, they mean you now know them too much that they now have no value before you...
presentation of character is so important too! Many married friends of mine lost their entire character and behave the same way or say the same things as their partner instead of being independent and have own thoughts and opinions. Truly sad, because they are unrecognisable from the way they were, and behaved in the past.
The thing that mostly break marriages and noone mentions it is the first baby. If you can be strong enough when the first baby comes, you'll face many other things easily. That's from my side
I totally agree.. never stop dating your spouse.. every marriage goes through things so always go back to what made you fall in love with that person and start doing the things you did in beginning or never stop doing those things!! Love you Ling and Lamb.. Ling you have one of the most beautiful smiles I've ever seen.. it's the most beautiful curve on a woman's body.. we love you here in Arizona💛🏜💛
