Hey Steve: She’s Not in the Five Year Plan || STEVE HARVEY 

Sums it up

well said!!!

And it’s just the first date if I heard correctly

Ditto. Slowing down is the best thing you can do for both you and your partner. High expectations after the first date was something I learned the hard way too

True, but he doesnt know her to say anything with her in it. Give him a few dates.

So true

@@diduknowfacts101I agree, to wait for 3 or 4 dates before he starts making plans is reasonable. However, I have heard so many stories of people who got married and the guy told the girl on the first date that he was going to marry her! I believe when you know, you know, but it won't be that fairytale for everyone, some girls just have to have patience until the guy makes a decision.

I agree. I'm like damn you moving too fast too soon. I personally would wait a couple months at least but definitely not the first couple dates. She acts like he's supposed to say on the first date I want babies and a marriage with you. I personally would be running in the other direction.

@@xxnarutxx3938 facts! They not even jumping the gun. They be jumping the gun and the whole clip. I'm like dam.

Right.

The Josh O Show yes meeee

Yes me

WHEN?!

What?! Why?? I just realized he had a show and come to RU-vid for clips.

that's going to depress me

He probably danced around the question because he might have been in the same situation before. Steve also mentioned how the guy didn't know what she wanted to hear. If the guy tells her something based off of what she wants to hear, that is not truthful and is very inauthentic. This man told her the truth, and his ultimate goal is different from hers, so she should not keep chasing someone who plans on leaving the country, while she has plans on settling down and having kids.

I am 21 years old and i have been proposed to more than 5 times and i said no, granted i am grafuating meds school jext year and am starting my own company i dont want marriage and i feel like these men are trying to trap me am from africa and am a muslim so saving yourself untill marriage is a big thing here .. so i dont know if they want me in the man and woman way or the ur a great catch way am i being paranoid?

@@zamzamalifarah8960 You are not being paranoid. If you feel that a man is not being authentic, and only wants to trap you, you are most likely right. You are doing well. When a good man comes along that truly sees you as a catch, you'll know it by his actions, and he won't be trying to force things so quickly. You sound like an awesome woman, so don't settle for less. Congratulations on your accomplishments by the way. That's some amazing stuff you are doing.

@@zamzamalifarah8960 You are in med school. You are not grafuating. You are graduating.

@Allen Reynolds Lol, dead wrong sir. There's no way I'd expect a guy to include me in his five-year plan when I just met him. I wouldn't even ask him that on the first date. There are other creative ways to ask questions without them even feeling like questions. 😃

@Allen Reynolds "That's basically all women". That's what I meant by you're wrong...hence I said I wouldn't expect a guy to include me in his 5-yr plan on the first date, also wouldn't even ask that question.

@Allen Reynolds I quoted your first comment above. "That's basically all women". Check it. You wrote ALL women, that's what I wasn't agreeing with.

I think he did say that

I think she got that

Well In woman's mind they will think the plan is not included them 5 years and the guy says he going to move to somewhere 5 years is not a short time. This lady thinks she is not the person in her boyfriend's plan I do think this doesn't gone wrong I think this is woman's tuition Except they both have a conversation and communication Find out what the guy really mean.

Lol

Too fast

Sandra R. Morales 😂😂😂

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

😂😂😂😂

Lol

shawn a lol

I said the same thing.

Lol, she's also looking in the wrong place and wrong age group for someone to settle down with apparently.

She better be careful or she will marry the wrong one.

She has about 15 years if she's healthy. She shouldn't be desperate.

It does when you're desperate as hell.

Hehehehehehe

Nikolaiwww we do that often

dance4life1208 Wise sister, men like that won’t fool with ya 😂. She looks naive.

AMEN. 👏👏💯🙋 No one else said it!

Thank you once again for you truthful insight... I think Steve is a little bitter... because I know he would have given her better advice than that... he tells us all the time "Don't let a man have to tell you more than once that he don't want you" orginally quoted by Judge Lynn Toler... Steve was wrong for scolding her for her asking that question and he specifically stated in HIS BOOK to ask that question on the FIRST DATE the irony... and she got the opposite answer of what she's looking for... I am so glad she looks like the type that don't fall for "trying to change a man" and then only get hurt because your head and heart knew he wasn't the one.. and Steve says that too... that "nothing compares to a women's intuition, God blessed us with such a powerful tool" - Steve Harvey... I don't think she needs to even hear Steve's advice but yeah I so agree with you... she should just move all the way on...

@@SpecialKRNB When did the guy say he didn't want her. Let be real for a moment you just met this girl/man and your suppose to tell her i see you in my 5 year plan even though you don't know the person 1 its either a lie to get the person to become interested or this person has some unseen agenda . looking at this situation i would be like that person crazy, that is like marrying a person you met yesterday. You guys just want to miss the point that she is thinking about her biological clock. Just to be frank if someone i didn't know said that they see me in their 5 year plan i would be a little freaked out because 1 i don't know the person so who knows what they have in stored for me

@@penlavits3305 First of all... no where in what she said, she wanted to marry the guy within the first five minutes of their first date.. secondly, she just needed confirmation on if she needed to continue to date him or not based off of what he initially told her... if you listen to the video again and listen carefully on what she said about her posing the question to him about HIS 5 year plan NOT hers with HIM... and she said initially he said that he wanted to move overseas and he proceeded to ask her the same exact question what was her 5 year plan and she told him marriage and a family and then she said that he mentioned the same that he wanted marriage and a family and it kind of threw her off when she originally asked him that question he didn't say anything about him wanting marriage and family just residing overseas..until AFTER he asked her.. which caused him to back-track in which it places him into a deceptive position... trust it is men that are out there that does that to hold a woman down and sabotage her happiness instead of letting her go and I can almost bet if she stays... highly doubt she will... she definitely trusts that instinct... (We as women KNOW whether or not a man is the one for us WAY before he even realizes it... it's just that some women choose to ignore it and some women like this lady and myself... had to learn to trust it... go with what our instincts are telling us and 100% of the time it tells us everything we need to know about a man be it good or bad and 10/10 it is ALWAYS right because the women that chose to ignore it before like myself again... had to the learn the hard way... found out just how wrong he really is and how right our intuition was all along... instead of believing what we don't see... we rather see for ourselves being hard-headed and here comes destruction... like an older person told me once before "warning comes before destruction" and those words alone is so true.. but I Thank God to have learned my lesson and trust what God himself has placed in us as women for our safety and protection) by her going on the Steve Harvey show this can give him more of a chance to be dishonest and start telling her EXACTLY what she wants to hear thus producing a broken heart on her part... I've seen this played out before... and I personally and honestly believe that she is doing herself a service by simply walking away... you men have got to understand that... YOU may see our women's intuition as irrational or crazy or lunacy but once we begin to trust it and be lead and guided by it...it saves us so much time, effort, emotion, and any other negative thing that is brought our way by the wrong man or the man that isn't for us and it allows us to rest comfortably, securely, and safely in the arms of the right man that was right for us all along... and it is okay that you don't believe it... live your truth... we the men and women who believes in it will live our truth...

@@SpecialKRNB Ok... you said that women know before men know. I have a question for you i met this girl at university through someone i knew we were both freshmen we met like only once in person however i didn't stay long i left to go about registration anyway i didn't meet her again anyway the guy that i was with told me that she asked me how i was doing and later that year when semester ended she asked him for my number which he gave now. Initially i didn't think much of it but i thinks she likes me but i am not sure been wondering for sometime now but i could just be reading into it too much after all people exchange numbers all the time so she may have just wanted my number because i seem like a nice/ok person. So does all this mean that she likes me or am i thinking to much by the way i not looking for a relationship at the moment just working on self improvement and those things will come after. with all that said i am of the understanding that girls and boys can't be friends unless they aren't attracted to each other. She also messages me 1st most of the time .let me add that she is wife material but like i said i am not ready for a relationship. So i don't want to ask then she wants to start a relationship and i am not about it at the moment. what are your thoughts ?

I'm glad that didn't happen, too many times you here the women side of meeting someone, and the one time it doesn't work out, the man gets ridiculed, and called all kind of names, and the man is not there to defend himself.

@@The1baddman preach

sefakor fiadjoe wow you pretty are you single married

I'm telling you... for real... and I agree with you 100%

Biologic clock ticking. She's been having fun in her 20s, now she want's a family, found a guy that looks good and is stable to afford one and he's the success object she needs to make her plans come true. It's completely self motivated on fear of being old and selfishness of wanting her dream come true without consideration for her potential partner's dreams.

He has money and she's trying to tie him down before he realises how annoying she is and changes his mind

Y'all reaching... she's just simply asking the guy a simple first date question in which Steve Harvey himself told women to ask on the first date.. and she's trying to UNDERSTAND simply if she should even continue to DATE the guy further... if she does personally she's gonna be wasting her time... now if he mentioned a family and kids prior when she orginally asked that question and she seeks advice stating that when should he pop the question after the FIRST DATE... then I'll say she's moving way too fast... but simply asking a question and getting to know someone and finding out where their heart lies and finding out whether or not you're compatible...that's not desperation that's her making her next move based off of his HONESTY... now he did try and back track which I quote Jude Lynn Toler, "Don't let a man have to tell you more than once that he don't want you" and Steve mentions this a lot too..if he backed-tracked then he will be in the realm of "deception" or "leading her on" or any other dishonest terms.. so her simply asking that question and him simply answering the question tells her everything she needs to know that first date that it shouldn't be a second because it will be pointless from that moment on because now he's going to be dishonest and deceptive moving forward... or as Steve puts it, "Telling her what she wants to hear" in order to keep her around a little longer so he can play or toy with her emotions.. but I can tell she seems like the moving on type once she has all her answers answered and it is not similar to hers... #js I think she's WISE for moving on..

@@SpecialKRNB That would be a simple question. "Do you want a family and kids?" She took the back door then got mad that it wasn't open

She probably think she's pregnant if he kiss her.

He's 30...

She the same age. Lol. U ok?

That's what I said. Most 30-yr old men aren't thinking of marriage like that.

Sura Amenra LOL that’s the point love 😂

@@AW-mc9xw Your comment sounds problematic.

Biological clock is all she is thinking about just to be frank she said she is 30 and that means she is at the wall. His 5 year plan decreases her chances to have kids if she decides to wait that is why she is wondering if she should invest time or not. This is why women shouldn't waste their 20s on alpha males because when it comes to having kids or having something stable its the beta males that can provide that. I hope it works out for her. Because by the time women hit 30 they start looking for the "good men" i.e the beta males who have a good stable jobs/careers that can provide for her and their kids.But sadly enough most of them are already taken,and thus the search continues for them up into their 40s. Which most women should know is that with age their beauty or ability to attract a man declines so if they wait too long the most they will be able to attract is the alpha males with no job or stable income some say they marry down if they can't find a man at their level or beyond their level. Men are visual creatures we do not care about what your dreams are and your fantasies when we first meet you. What we see is something that catches our eye and we go after it that is just how it works. Look at it this way ,who do you think has better chance of attracting a male; a women in her 30s or a women in her 20s ? if some people want to argue about well if the woman carries herself well and looks like she is in her 20s. While then just to fix that lets say 40s and 20s respectively. The woman in her 20s will attract the male almost every time but of course this all depends on the male. That is he may like older women just because its its something he may or may not find attractive mainly the idea of an older woman could be the thing that turns him on. Anyway what i want to reinforce is that women shouldn't waste their time on males that won't take them anywhere but this all up to women and whatever their current goals are in those moments. In the end the women who find the hard working boy in the class as unattractive and would rather have fun with the stud find out at an later date that that hard working student will someday be the best possible mate to have kids with if they want to have s good life wear she is support financially and not having to worry about things other than what color paint to have the wall done in Rather than the alternative where she is stuck with a kid and the dad isn't there because he left her the moment he found out or the father can't support her because he doesn't have a stable job even though her trying his best but with all this said and done its really up to the females when it comes to having a good life for the rest of their days above ground breathing and reproducing.

@@penlavits3305 exactly bruh. The wall is undefeated. Theses overgrown girls play around clubbing their most prime years away and then try to pull a fast one on nature in their 30s lol. Choose a career or a family. Almost impossible to maintain both past 5-10 years tops without eventually getting a divorce or having a miserable marriage

Same here... but she responded and said she actually went on a 2nd date with the guy and 3rd date underway... hopefully, she be careful... because now he has so much leverage to lie to her just to cater to her specific needs.. it is a lot of pretenders out there in the dating world and it has gotten so much worse they wait to show them true colors well after marriage now... that 6th sense saves our lives as women like you I failed to trust it but I learned my lesson quick, fast, and in a hurry... I really was hoping she wouldn't have gone on a second date with him... but ah well... we all live and learn

This is exactly what I've been saying! People really don't get it 🤦 It's like some of them don't have comprehension skills. She just wants to know of having a wife/marriage is in his general 5 yr plan, along with the travel (because it might not be)

It's an informal way of language in conversation with someone else such as slang... normally... we write the English language in its proper form but as we speak we tend to do without the proper English order of words, and sentences, syntax, and so forth... but you said it perfectly...

@GG T87 awww... we're all not so bad.. I mean Steve did mention that he was not a fan of school... and it doesn't negate his intelligence at all... it's just that we as Americans are still learning many forms of proper English verbally and nonverbally... I mean look at Michelle Obama and Barack Obama as examples and many other intellectual African-Americans... but as I said Steve is still intelligent in his own right...

@GG T87 Thank you for your adise ;) Cheers mate -*

T C ummmm sir...you’re clearly bitter for some reason. I have NO REASON to hate on any woman. I have my opinion and guess what??? IT AINT CHANGING OVER HERE. Go troll someone else. ✌🏽

T C enjoy your day 👋🏽

TheDawizardofozz33 you can tell she isn’t

L exactly

@T C LOL