History Summarized: Thebes’ Greatest Accomplishment Ever 

I mean, I suppose I now know why people found the Flintstones so funny

Two Greek kingdoms went to an all-out, bloody, decades-long war over the ownership of a bucket that two farmers found exactly on their property line, which just also happened to be the kingdom border as well. History is full of hindsight ridiculousness and hilarity if you just look.

@@GuukanKitsune “Do you even know what triggered the last world war? An argument with Germany over how many telegraph poles they owed their war debt creditors. Telegraph poles! It's all a joke! Anything anybody ever valued or struggled for, it's all just a monstrous, demented gag.”- Joker. The killing joke.

@@RogueT-Rex8468 Warning about The Joker. He's crazy, so take what he says with a grain of salt. Although, yeah, that's one of the things that happened, the causes were varied and complex. The total annexment of Czechoslovakia, shortly followed by the invasion of Poland, is what ultimately turned it from a series of disagreements into an outright war. The bucket thing really happened, though.

That, Vincent, is the fundamental basis of OSP.

Let's see the power to see the future and bring plagues upon thine enemies, & drunken Madness...no I could see that happening.

@Aung Un'Rama Well Apollo was on vacation and Dionysus was throwing up in the nearst bush all day long

@Aung Ramen You could say that Thebes should therefore have seen that coming, but that would be ironic.

I'll drink to that.

@Aung Ramen honestly there city getting sacked was on themselves, should’ve remained loyal

Weeell, if one looks at Sparta's battle record, one comes to realize Sparta kind of loses as often as they win. What they REALLY had going for them was their reputation, and Thebes kind of shattered that.

@@Talyrion Spartans werent even half as tough as people think. As you said they only had a great reputation and that is what they lived from. They were so effective at spreading propaganda that we believe that they are superwarriors today.

@@Stego1819 the Spartans really were that good. But there were never really that many of them. Only a small portion of Spartan armies were made up of actual Spartans. The rest of the army was made up of "allies". The Spartans usually took position on the right (Hence why Epaminondas targeted the right). A couple of years before Luectra, at a place that sounds like Corona (can't remember the name😅), the Thebans were busy losing a battle against the Spartans, at some point, a gap in the Spartan line formed and the Thebans managed to escape the battlefield through that gap. Then a few years after that, at Tygera, Pelopidas led the 300 Sacred Band and some cavalry to attack a Spartan Garrison while the Spartans were gone. But when they got there, The Spartan Garrison was already replaced. So they turned and ran home before they were noticed. But just as they were heading home. Another 2 Spartan mora just so happens to be returning from the north and noticed them. The Thebans panicked as they realized theyre trapped. Pelopidas remembered that previous battle where the Thebans escaped through a gap in the Spartan line and came up with a strategy to replicate that escape. The Spartans formed their line, and then Pelopidas sent his cavalry to harass the Spartan flanks, kicking up dust and screening his next move. Then Pelopidas formed the sacred band into a very deep formation with the intention of this deep formation smashing through the Spartan line and creating a means of escape. This worked much better than anticipated. The point of impact was devastating on that part of the Spartan line. It worked so well that both Spartan officers (of each mora) was killed on impact. The two Spartan mori began to waver at the sight of their fallen officers and the Thebans having pierced their line. At this point, Pelopidas abandoned the escape plan and ordered his men to turn and attack the newly exposed flanks and rear of the Spartans. The Spartans lost this engagement. This was the first time the Spartans were beaten by a numerically inferior enemy. This deep formation worked so well that it became a common tactic used by Theban generals during this war and they expanded on this tactic. Developing it further. By the time of Luectra, the Thebans had pretty much perfected this Deep formation tactic. This new tactical innovation was what they used to defeat the Spartans on the Right flank at Luectra. The Thebans massed their troops on the left, made their Phalanx there an insane 50 ranks deep, and then sent this sledge hammer towards the Spartan right. The Spartan flank was completely bulldozed at impact by this increadibly deep and massed Theban unit. Massing that many troops on one flank weakens the rest of the line. The Thebans solved this problem by inventing the refused flank innovation. The Thebans would delay the rest of their weakened line (they'd be ordered to march slower), until the sledge hammer did it's job. This was what happened at Luectra, and how the Spartans were defeated. The Sacred band was on the flank next to the sledge hammer. They swung around and flanked while the Spartan right was being bulldozed. When the Real Spartans were crushed, the rest of the "Spartan" line routed. Again, the rest of the line werent really Spartans...they were "allies" from other cities and towns. Epaminondas knew that, and he knew that taking out the real Spartans first would cause the rest of the line to break and run. The Spartans really were that good. The Sacred Band would later be defeated completely by the Macedonian phalanx...head to head. A couple of years later, a few Spartan boys and Spartan women (the Spartan army was not home) would repel the army of Pyrrhus of Epirus. A very experienced Macedonian style army with some Macedonian veterans in it, that fought with Alexander in Asia. Including heavy cavalry and even war Armored Indian War Elephants. This same army had fought and beat several Roman and Carthaginian armies. This formidable army was repelled by a few Spartan boys.

@@tylerdurden3722 facts

Which King of Sparta? There are always two.

and then they won

Can you imagine rallying your army under those circumstances? "Alright men, I know we've all been hoping to finally put this long war with the Spartans behind us after fighting them for 6 years without progress. I know many of you were relieved to hear of the peace talks taking place yesterday. Peace, sweet and gentle peace, was finally so close we could all practically taste it. However, I regret to inform you that those Spartans, blinded by their arrogance, would not allow us to add a minor amendment to include a swear on behalf of our allies to our vow to uphold peace which would have made us appear more prestigious. Therefore they have left us no choice but to reignite the flames of war right when their final embers were dying out. Would any of you let the Spartans slight us so unpunished? I think not. TO WAR!!!"

Basically lol

Macedon: *knocking on the door Thebes: *Open the door Macedon: "Allow us to introduce ourselves"

@@MiguelPerez-zx2wg men of wealth and taste?

"Reality is unrealistic." -TV Tropes

Fiction has to make sense. Reality is under no such obligation.

Very understandable why Alexander finally went: "OK, we've had enough of this shit!"

MEMEEEE

I am missing only 2 of these things

Well anything works with good enough tactics and men.

In fairness they actually won the war by killing the main Theban general and all his leutianants at the battle of Manitea ending the war in a Spartan and Athenian victory, and depleating everyone's male populations to the point Phillip of Macedon steam rolled everyone

@@grahamcochran5400 sparta didnt won the war. A time pass to Thebes fall apart for politic issues. Sparta didnt win anything and They didnt got anything. Sparta lose to thebes. Then lose twice to the macedonians. And then they lose to romans.

@@albertofrankdiaz6664 I think you missed the point. Thebes won the battle of Leuctra, but failed during their invasion of Laconia proper in militaristic terms, in strategical terms losing the Battle of Manitea which ended the short bit of Theban Hegemony. After that point, no singular state exercised Hegemony until the conquest of Phillip of Macedon. You are correct in your latter statements in regard to the revolt of Agis III I believe where he was killed outside Corinth, and then later at the Battle of Sellasia in 222 BC under Cleomenes III. And Nicas of Sparta was sorta conquered but more just was politically absorbed by Rome once he lost his main port to a quick Roman naval invasion. In relation to the war against Thebes, in a battlefield since Thebes lost the war and its hegemony over Greece, but in the process crushed Sparta's manpower and liberated Messenia while also putting Athens in heavy amounts of debt, thus the main 3 players in Greek politics were weakened. The situation was much more black and white than "They didnt got anything. Sparta lose to thebes."

Not just that, the Thebans also liberated the Helots, which basically destroyed the entirety of Spartan society, which was contingent on the helots being enslaved. Thebes didn’t just beat Sparta; Thebes RUINED Sparta.

@@fredericksmith7942 Sparta existed for another 175 years. Alexander RUINED Thebes only 40 years later. 6000 Thebans killed in battle and the rest of the entire 30,000 strong population of the city sold into slavery and scattered to the wind. Makes the 1000 Spartans lost at Leuctra look rather quaint eh? All by Alexander who used tactics taught to him by his father Phillip II who had ironically learned military arts under Epaminodas the greatest Theban general when he was a hostage of Thebes as a boy during their short "hegemony". Sparta will remain an enduring military symbol known around the world and Thebes will continue to be nothing more than a footnote best known for fielding a unit of gay soldiers.

And now I can't unhear it as that

That... Honestly wouldve been a thousand times as terrifying

“How about a legion of spiiiiders?!”

​@@ConnanTheCivilized Greek fire

Wow, no wonder the Spartans lost.

I wanted to talk about the refused flank, which, you're right, is super important, but that would have meant adding another minute to the video, or drawing out a battle plan, and I figured explaining the concept behind the Sacred Band was enough military history for one day. (Don't worry, I'll be all over those refused flanks when I'm talking about Alexander in a future video :D )

@@hades2596 Epaminodas was the great military strategist of his time. But Thebes was not strong enough to be hegemon of Greece, especially after Epaminodas died.

Kinda sums up all human civilisation forever

Actually I think it’s the opposite. Instead of putting string against weak thebes put strong against strong and won that side and the weak side crumbled on its own

The Sacret Band was also all gay dudes. Sparta, one of the Most gay societies in all of history, got out-gayed.

Yeah, genius!

Such wow...

@@CommissarMitch Battle of the Gays

You beat me to this comment. Thebes overcame Sparta with their own 300 elite fighters, and they were gay.

It was pretty gay, but I don't think it was retarded. It worked very well, as history will tell.

The greeks didn't view sexuality quite like we do. To them, bisexuality was the norm. So, they were mostly bisexual lovers who very likely had female lovers too. Still, proves that having sexual attractions towards men doesn't make you weak though.

+Máté Kovács ...I am sorry. what? I am pretty sure i established I am gay, so why should I cut myself? Because they made the word homophobia? I am pretty sure you should read my comment again.

Oi! Chill out you jerk, just because you got your special snowflake panties in a twist doesn't mean you have to tell someone to cut themselves. The original commenter has blatantly stated that they are gay so why in the world are you getting so crazy and out of control with your response. As I said before, simmer the fuck down.

In addition to putting his best troops right up against Sparta's, Epaminondas also stacked those troops ridiculously deep. A typical Greek phalanx was 8 ranks deep. ie each guy on the front line had 7 other soldiers behind him. When phalanxes collided, those ranks would be pushing forward against the backs of the men in front of them, thus combining their strength against the opposing phalanx who did the same. But Epaminondas had the Thebans on the left flank stacked *50 deep.* So each 8 Spartans had 50 Thebans pushing against them. This weakened the Thebans' own right flank, but that was up against the conscripted soldiers of Sparta's conquered "allies", who didn't even want to fight. Once the front line on the Spartan right flank started to fall, it was an absolute stampede. And as soon as Sparta's allies saw the Spartans losing, they noped the hell out of there.

Nah, I'd say that's just all history in general. Hooray pointless deaths! :D (One of my favourites is the war over the drunken stealing of a bucket in Italy)

The Unusual Stranger it was likely a calculated pretext to justify attacking Sparta and establishing dominance of Greece.

Not only ancient.

@@Rynewulf wait, what? When?

@@rawovunlapin8201look up 'The Bucket War', 1400s northern Italy if I'm not mistaken?

Goddammit, go away Walpole! You're not even born here yet!

Ankyri I'm Walpole. With my Delorean and tardis I can go any where any time I am needed elsewhere WALPOLE AWAY

*shakes fist at sky* WALPOOOOOLE!!!

What about Bismark?

This is the almighty Walpole we are talking about so no wonder he'd hijack the overly sarcatics. While Bismark is busy expanding the German teritory over EC, Walpole is here pulling off his signature walpolean antics.

not the way the lolspartan sycophants tell it but yeah I agree.

Alexander completely ripped their city apart brick. By. Brick. The city did not exist anymore. It was just walls with no buildings inside. Thebes ceased to exist.

Ok, lets be clear on something: what they did wasn't awesome, it was in fact very stupid. They risk the peace and sacrifice many men for that stupid thing. It's kinda funny though because of how turned out, but is still not awesome.

@ sure, but it is funny in hindsight.

@@Alizudo it was rebuilt and still exists in modern Greece

It’s called Oblique order

@@ENVYYedit Frederick the Great won a lot of battles by oblique order and refusing his flank.

Maxim 43: If it's stupid but it works, it's still stupid and you're lucky.

@@drascin Some of the greatest blunders in history happened because someone tried something stupid and it worked, and someone else, watching, thought "hey it worked, I guess it wasn't so stupid after all," and then tried to do the same thing, again.

That doesn’t mean it’s not still ridiculous.

The DORUK same

No but their elite force "the sacred band" was entirely comprised of boys and men in pedophiliac relationships, as it was believed that the lovers would protect eachother more that way.

@@theposhdinosaur7276 While I know there was an age difference, I *strongly* doubt the "boys" they sent in as their elite force would be young enough for the relationship to be "pedophiliac". The entire point of the thing was to get 300 elite soldiers capable of defeating a military superpower, not 150 elite soldiers and some dead weight kids.

@@helenanilsson5666 Not when fully trained at least. Since this is so ancient, it's really hard to tell the specifics.

Sacred band of Thebes:

The WTF Girl it is ok.

Χαίρετε (sorry for my bad Greek)

Idan Zamir It's ok but χαίρετε it's way too formal... try something like γεια σου it's more common among Greeks 😊

ευχαριστώ 😄😄

Idan Zamir παρακαλώ 😊

Wasnt Oedipus in the end from and king of Thebes? Yea. Yea. Getting a propaganda vibe there.

Pretty much. After helping Sparta beat Athens, they help Athens beat Sparta. Perfectly balanced, as all things should be?

Hilarity would not ensue

moonymonster And that's just no fun.

What did happen was another war where Sparta and Athens now both thought Thebes was too powerful. Thebes won, but lost their amazing general, and thus status quo was re-established for an entire 2 seconds before the Macedonians showed up.

also age of mithology soundtrack

Karla C - Yaaaaay someone else noticed too!!!

Calculated risk

I think its time for a summerween episode!

Reminds me of Long box of the Damned Summer Special.

In addition to putting his best troops on the left flank to go directly against Sparta's best, Epaminondas also heavy backed them up by stacking his left flank numerically. He knew the Spartan left flank was made up of troops conscripted form the cities that Sparta had conquered, and thus didn't even want to fight for Sparta. He correctly predicted that those conscript troops wouldn't attack unless it was already clear Sparta was winning. So he thinned out the Theban phalanx on that side, while making his left flank 50 ranks deep. By comparison, a typical phalanx (as the Spartans were using) was 8 ranks deep. So when the best troops of both sides collided, the Spartans were locally outnumbered by more than 6 to 1.

why didn't the allies just join the peace treaty? And why didn't thebes think of that before they agreed?