I can’t trust anymore, I won’t let him hurt me again, he doesn’t get another chance. I just don’t understand her. I am working on forgiveness for myself, but reconciliation is not something I want.
I will tell u this dont let hollywood determine what to do bcz a lot of the people there are on a mess. If u go bac 3 4 generations people had these issues and worked on them talk to ur grand parents get the real story. I have even seen children coming out of this and over time the parties reconcile and they end up loving the child more than their own.....its about being human and the human condition.....whats your condition as a human? Can you love someone who is weak and needs you? Or would you punish bcz of pride or hollywood says so? Your human condition can you forgive someone you love? Or would u conjure the feeling of anger that would fade over time and when that goes, which it will, you will find there is love.....so be human not a patented hollywood response.
@@sarahalderman3126If someone is truly contrite, I'd give them another chance. It's a matter of the heart and repentance. I hope you heal. Bitterness is a killer.
Fair. I'm in the same boat. NEVER AGAIN will I allow myself to be hurt by this person. I am the ONLY ONE who can truly protect my heart. The moment I let my guard down , I open myself up to chaos I have ZERO interest in participating in any longer. Stand your ground. Hardline the crap out of your boundaries
Why don't you guys ever address the sexual problems in the marriage after the affair ? feelings of sexual rejection, sexual comparisons to AP, obsessions, intrusive thoughts, feelings of disgust, long term damage ?
There are videos from AR that address restoring intimacy and intrusive thoughts. Also, the Harboring Hope course is invaluable and goes in depth about how to manage this and heal from it as well.
Sexual intimacy usually follows emotional intimacy and that requires building empathy and vulnerability and recovering from trauma and intrusive thoughts. Or, let me put it this way - once you get those cornerstones in place and are building a new, safer and emotionally intimate relationship, the sexual aspect typically doesn't need that much, if any help. Physical intimacy is a descendent of emotional intimacy.
I am still walking alone with Christ through the valley and road to recovery in my own life. I too have related to the Book of Hosea in my personal life. Thank you for sharing part of your journey Stephanie
First, thank you for this video, very much appreciated. I'm in my 5th year of recovery although the discloser was 10 years ago. Through the first 3-5 years I had hope that I would have the marriage and love life that I desired. However, the last 5 years I've worried that that is never going to happen. When I hear Stephanie talk about the 20th year of recovery, although she sounds contented, I don't see the love and life in her demeanor. This validates my fear of going through all this for very little return.
I hear you, Melody. Let’s give ourselves credit for making the progress we have, stay with the healing program we have chosen, be persistent in prayer and DO NOT QUIT. We can reach a better place eventually - but giving up will get us nowhere! 👍
There are numerous videos on this channel that focus on an unfaithful female. I think it’s just that men are more often than not the unfaithful, especially initially. Basically that when women are unfaithful it is usually in response to their partner’s unfaithfulness.
@@sarahalderman3126I could not disagree with you more on the statement that men commit more infidelity than women! From my own experience of being the betrayed we as good men are very protective by nature and when we are betrayed even though we are destroyed emotionally we still will try and protect our unfaithful spouse and our own image and not tell anyone. We just end up suffering in silence because we do not want to be victims. I think that woman cheat more than men because they feel entitled to it and when they get caught they blame the man and the man protects them and it's not reported or talked about.
@@scottpaulsen7845 I agree brother. I want to love her and help her in spite of the unreal pain I'm feeling. It's very odd I feel this way instead of just complete hatred and anger. I was angry for a couple days, but since then I'm not. Hope you're doing well.
It's good to see this channel not really taking off, as it attempts to obscure or deny the fact that when women cheat it's much, much worse. Most of these "recovery" stories are of betrayed wives recovering. Men do not ever get over this.
I'm so sorry. You are worth much better than to be treated like that. Focus on God's love right now. If you have pets, then cat love or dog love is invaluable to grab a few good moments to get you through the pain.
I tried to stay with my ex after I caught her in bed naked with another guy. I only lasted about a month before I just had to leave her for good. Now I'm back in the same situation, I can't believe it. This time I really want to stay, but I wonder if leaving would be much easier in the long run.
I really need some advice - Fiance and partner of 8 year's met a woman from work, I caught the affair before it physically started. We seperated, but during the first 6months of attempts to reconcile he was having a full affair with this woman from work. It is now finally over and again we are trying to move forward. He is still working with this woman. My question is, should he leave his job? He is reluctant to do so because of his salary and fear of rebuilding up his status. What are your thoughts?
How much do you trust him? Personally, I would tell my spouse to get out of that situation because the temptation is too heavy and I would be unable to live with this insecurity caused by their continued interaction, albeit allegedly on a professional level.
