how i got my life back together 

thank u guys for always being here. love u :)

omg this is a full-on documentary this is AMAZING

Actually I feel like you nowadays, I lost interest on things that I used to like a lot and I don't know. This video is really important for me because now I realize that there's more people that is feeling like me and that I'm not the only one, because feeling like this usually made me feel like I was worth nothing. Thank you Jem ♡

every year i always say, “i wont let me be like that” “im gonna change my ways” “im not about that anymore” but i end up having to repeat these things and its like a loop, i keep gravitating to these really bad black holes and i end up being so deep into these bad things i even start shoving people who are dear to me. I become toxic and its crazy bc i didnt think i would be. The power of ur thoughts and emotions are greater than anything, with no sense of reflection, it keeps spiraling and thats me lol

the cinematography in this is brilliant

I had never had a passion. I just was trying all my life new things and never being consistent with any. I compared myself to my friends during 2 of my worst years, because I thought I was ugly, I did not have a good style, etc. When people say this quarentine is the worst thing that could happen, I disagree. Finally I have time to think about myself and re-evaluate my thoughts. I have now started to love myself and doing what I think I like. And everyone should do it. Don't stress about a bad day, there are 365 in a year. I am sure not every day will be that bad :,) Love yourself because if you don't, anyone will repleace that type of love. Do what you want, dance, sing, scream, run, just do it. And fuck people who think you are worthless or talk bad about you. wowowowo that was sentimental

funny how I've cried all day today because I'm so, so exhausted with and tired of my life and depression, and RU-vid recommends this video to me. this is a sign. time to finally get happy, I guess.

I’ve been dealing with depression for about a year now and it’s already pretty hard but it’s also making it hard for me to control my ED thoughts, even if I’m weight restored. University has been and is hell on earth for me and Covid19 didn’t make it any better. I clicked so fast when I saw the notification because seeing someone who I’ve followed and grown with and inspired by for the past 4 years saying how she feels vulnerable too made me see how not alone I am in this. Thank you for this, seriously 💜

I get this completely, being isolated/quarantined has caused me to be on my phone ALL THE TIME. I’ve lost multiple friends because of this aswell. I’ve lost interest in many things I was in love with and I had major depression last year. I want to go out, I want to hang with people. I don’t want I be on the internet,sleeping and eating all the time. It’s unhealthy and overwhelming.

i hope you're doing okay my love

I can relate so much, I've been in a slump for the longest time every since quarantine, it really does give you so much time to think. It's like an everlasting seasonal depression. Things will just never be the same and we just have to accept and deal with what's going on and power through. Although things may not change around us, we can change our selves by powering through. It takes time, and eventually, we will get back on track and hope for the best. Thanks for helping us or at least me be more motivated and back up again. Those countless nights where I don't sleep could have been used for something else and not crying my eyes out to sad music. Stay safe and healthy, Jem! (Also ty for listening to my TedTalk)

I'm going the same thing right now and I'm literally just a teenager like why do I care about my future job, i LITERALLY have no dream, I don't wanna be a teacher, doctor, pilot, lawyer. nothing. I don't wanna exist in life, I don't know what to do anymore. I feel so helpless 😵

You see, I want to do something to get my life back together, but I am so scared and I keep doubting myself and my thoughts of "you'll do it tomorrow" just keep winning over what my body needs and what my heart wants and I've been hiding it for SO long. That wanting is overshadowed by the thoughts and later I end up watching these productive videos because my brain thinks that while watching someone else be productive, I am satisfying that wanting even though I am not the one taking action. To those who feel the same, we'll somehow get through this. I believe in us so let's not give up, the both of us.

I don't think I've ever related to any video this much in my life. Thanks SO much for being so honest and sharing this! Much love!

oh my :( my routine is; -> wake up -> eat if i feel like it -> lay in bed -> sleep aand repeat

i really relate to that routine... and the sad thing is i've been doing it for MONTHS and haven't been able to break out of it and i feel like i can't since people around me restrict it (i can't wake up early since i'll wake up the whole house), nor can i be really productive cuz its so darn noisy all the time and people around me do different things at different times and AAAARGHHHH my heads going to explode

6:35 “I just feel like everything is falling apart” never been so relatable to something

Thank you for this video

*This was the most useful/insightful/enjoyable/inspiring 18mins i spent online.* This level of self-actualisation is really beautiful to see. Thank you sm for sharing this with us Jasmine, you have no idea how much this helps me

This is my life but I’m almost 30 😭 hang in there girl u got this

28 year old here. Age is just a number when it comes to "having everything together". I had the same struggles and cycles during the quarantine and can't say that I got over them completely, but I am progressing. Quarantine is affecting a lot of people psychologically and thanks to people sharing experiences/solutions like you others feel helped to stand up. Your subscribers will be here to know what you are going through, cheers

This is gonna help me so much bc I’m going thru a pretty tough time right now . Thank you for helping me jem🙂

one thing I recommend is disconnecting from social media. Ever since quarantine I had been on instagram so much that the days would pass by so quickly. I’ve encountered toxic users, found out some of my internet friends were toxic and led me to overthinking so much and being sad all the time. I realized during that time that I have never cried so much. I decided to put a timer to see how long I can stay off of instagram and it’s been great, I feel refreshed and I’m actually productive. I highly recommend it if you were in the same position as me

I think everyone’s creativity and self worth is taking a hit during this time. And it sets you up to look much deeper within yourself, and it seems like you have done just that. I like your approach of how to handle those highs and lows of being creative. Just always remember there is always something good on the horizon. As my favorite RU-vidr would say “Take Care”💕

this is me... this is literally me except for the part that 'I got myself back'... the fact that this resonates with my image scares me. I also took a year gap and since my exams are postponed I literally have lost interest which I legit cannot afford to! I need to get myself and my priorities back on track...

I’ve been watching you for a couple years now, and you’ve been my biggest source of motivation and inspiration for a while. Seeing you speak up about your mental state, and opening up about how you’ve been in this cycle really shows that everyone is human with complex feelings. Thank you for sharing this w/ us, it’s really comforting and I’m glad you were able to reach out and get out of a difficult mental cycle.

I can relate to this so much. It’s been really hard to find myself inspired again since I’ve been dealing with a lot of feelings that I have suppressed for a lot of time. Especially now during quarantine that I have too much time to think, more like overthink. This inspired me to try again and get up. All I’ve been doing is watching RU-vid, Netflix and do some homework. I used to post videos on RU-vid but I got too lazy and felt they weren’t good enough but I feel inspired to try again. I feel inspired to try again in my everyday routine. I’ll definitely read the book you recommended. Thank you for this 🧡

I am Genuinely glad this video came out

I’m so glad that instead of hiding and pretending that you were okay, you owned up to it and overcame it. Also I just wanted to say your voice is so sweet and calming 🥺❤️ AND WE HAVE THE SAME PHONE CASE

ooh, finally early! but seriously though I cried my eyes out today because I felt I wasn't good enough... at anything.

Your videos have gotten me through the toughest years in my life where I lacked inspiration and lost passion in everything--art, writing, studying. Your content Jem got me back on my feet. Calmed me, made me get off my bed and under my covers and get to work. That's how impactful you've been. And today, literally this video was what I needed and it just made me sad to see you like this but also, I'm so glad you've been so truthful about all this. It takes so much to speak about mental health, i hope you find your way back. I hope you're healthy and happy. And I know you can do it, because you're a wonderful and talented person. Take care.

ma'am the CINEMATOGRAPHY is amazing. you truly have the biggest, wrinkliest brain 😤your videos and streams are what kept me going and sane when my depression was at its worst. i'm glad you're doing better now and thank you for everything you do ily (,,:

My schedule has definitely fallen into this as well. Also this is one of the best videos you've ever made. The editing, the lighting, the feel is amazing.

I love the way you edited the intro and how it reflects your state of mind. I'm also stuck in a rut as well, and it's horrible since I'm avoiding a lot of my responsibilities and spending less time with my friends and family because I just feel so demotivated and unhappy all the time. This video has helped me to at least rethink about my current situation right now, and the steps that I can take towards fixing it. Thank you for being honest about yourself because I know how hard it can be. I will support you in your journey towards growth ^^

This is really important because sometimes when you realize that you've been feeling like this, you want to ignore it and put your head in the sand. When it happens to me I try to disctract myself from what scares me. I do art and for the last few days I haven't been able to make anything. So instead I cleaned my appartment, did some knitting, watched some videos, and just tried to take my time and not stress myself out too much. Quarantine was easy because I wasn't alone, but now it's the summer holidays and I'm alone most of the day and it doesn't really help because there's no one around to tell me I've been on my phone for way too long.

It’s so coincidental how you are my favorite youtuber, and we almost have the same glasses and above all else, i am also going through what you’re going through ☹️ School is going to start by august 24 and i felt like i still haven’t found myself yet. Idk which college course to take or whatever. I find it really difficult because i don't basically have a passion or i lost all of my passion because my dad was never really supportive in the things i do in my life and i live separately with my mom (the only person who understands me and supports me) because they are separated. It's been weighing up on me for a year and i have really been unproductive because i am just finding ways not to think about this but now i feel like i have a deadline again. That is why i am lowkey kind of thankful for the pandemic because it's given people like me opportunity to pause and rethink about life goals. Also these past few months I had body dysmorphia which took a lot of my time which again switched my priorities in life because i was never happy about my body and i felt fat, and I also had some idk depression? because i would cry every night thinking about how i wasted an opportunity to go to my mom before the lockdown happened because staying here with my dad (with this scorching heat because i live in the Philippines and our weather temp. often reach 104F here and i'm just using a fan because my dad doesn't want to put my room an ac) is making my life more difficult knowing he's not really supportive in the things i do and he shouts to the whole neighborhood how i stopped going to school just to lurk around or idk he keeps hauling insults towards me how i took a year off from college and it's making my mental health really unstable, I also can't go to my mom because travels can't be done due to lockdowns, and also because my dad would get really mad and probably stop giving me financial aid since we rely on him to get quality education since my mom doesn't earn as much as my dad which explains why i'm with my dad. He will also embarrass me to his siblings (my aunt and uncle) and talk shit about me if ever i was to go with my mom, so i really don't have much choice. That's why when youtube recommended me your channel it has helped me a lot (i actually cried watching this documentary because it's the exact same thing i am going through) and when it notified me that your vid was up again it was also kinda like a sign from the universe that i have to get my shit together this june or i'll be damned again and be like depressed again. sorry for rambling i know no one cares but it's just that i really have no one to turn to since i really don't have friends and if probably i open up to them they probably don't care or i just don't want to be burden to them so yeah.

I just found your account, and I have immediately fallen in love with it. All your videos are so calming, and they remind me so much of a Wes Anderson film. thank you for this ;3

From the bottom of my heart thank you. I am a med student and have been down for the past two months, procastinated soo much,and I kept avoiding the truth like you said. This video was god sent tonight, exactly what I needed. Ill be updating every single day and sharing my day, I have a good 3 weeks left till exams and Ill make it.

hope you're feeling better jasmine!!i know it's actually so hard to face problems while quarantine.you can run away when u don't have time but when it's quaratine,you can't run.hope everyone that is feeling bad ab yourself is getting better.sending all love to y'all.

wooow the universe works so perfectly. in one week i start my final exams that determine if i get into uni or not and i have to revise (or learn) sooo much and generaly i've been trying to work really hard but due to some problems it wasn't always going the way that i wanted and planned but two days ago i had pretty big break down and couldn't pick myself up and work and now i found this video or rather this video found me and i feel so much better and stronger! you always hear that you have to have defined goal and stuff but most of the time u forget and you saying about original purpose just opened my eyes about what i have to do so THANK YOU

Human beings get tired, it is ok to be lazy and it is ok to be productive. Resting, watching Netflix and youtube can be seen as productive as you are gathering energy for your future self. I got depression and anxiety in 2018( my final year of secondary) and there are many times that I felt useless when the rest of the world was working super hard for the public exam when I was basically having a long holiday as I have to sleep 16-18 a day that I felt ok. I was a very productive kid before I was diagnosed that I basically worked 16-18 hours a day that I burnt out and now I learn we can never be too "lazy" or too " productive", we are human beings and needing a break is normal, every day being alive should not be seen as your last, be kind to yourself. Sometimes, the most important thing is how you see your self ( aka your self-image) and how you develop your self-esteem. You can do most of you can and that is enough. Best of luck, we will always be here for you.

I really needed to watch this video today because I definitely have been going through the same thing for weeks now. The biggest slap in the face was my phone telling me my screen time had increased by 80% from the previous week. Not something I'm proud of it. It's Sunday and I've sat myself down to really re-evaluate what it is that I want from myself. Thank you so much for being so open and honest and for sharing what can be helpful!

I LOVE the way you convey your emotions throughout ur whole video. Emotions are a beautiful thing. No matter if ur happy or sad, it still feels good to feel them. Keep it up! 👏👏👍👍

honestly, although i had a hard time in the first weeks of quarantine, i gotta thank it for making me go back to two things i treasured and let go two years ago... reading and writing! i went back to reading books, picking the titles i always wanted to read back then but always postponed, and i picked up my old random notes and worked on them yet again... guess to me it worked in reverse, it made me enjoy things again... thank you for making this video jem, i love seeing you get back on your feet

Dude the editing on this was legit AMAZING. I hope you know how much we appreciate your content and your insights. I just started watching your content today but wow your content resonates with me SO MUCH. Even if you may not feel like it, you're a shining light for me rn and it's crazy we get to see your content practically for free. Much love to you, and i hope you're doing better now!

literally can’t sleep and it’s almost 2:30am here in the 🇵🇭. i’ve been wondering why you didn’t upload a video last couple of days and it made me kind of constantly checking on your channel to see if u have a latest upload & also on your ig stories and tweets. i’m really happy when i opened my youtube app today and saw this new upload. i just want to say that, jem, you inspire me, to be honest i just started a yt channel and had already two videos uploaded since last week and that’s bc you inspire me of your videos 🥺. you are one of my fave youtuber! thank you for being an inspiration!! it’s okay to feel what you’ve been feeling. 🤍

i’ve been in a slump for what seems like the longest time... i decided to look on youtube again and saw this video! i remember i used to watch your videos all the time, and this one really helped me thank u

jem's editing is genuinely 10/10, reallyyy draws you in!

I really needed this. Recently I have been feeling really bad and comparing myself to my sister. She is moving out for university soon and she’s been talking a lot about her plans and just overall things about her life. She has a boyfriend, I have never had a boyfriend, kissed a boy, or had a guy have a crush on me. She’s has an average of 97%, and I have been struggling with the stress of school work. She hangs out with her friends all the time and I haven’t seen my friends in almost a year now. I could lie and say that it’s because of covid, but my friend group and never really hung out before. I can’t even say I have a best friend. She has been talking about how she feels so happy and can’t wait to “start her new life” at uni and I feel like I have no idea what I’m doing. I realized I started making jokes about crying and being sad around my family as a cry for help and it’s become a reoccurring joke. For example “I only cried 4 times this week...hahaha”. I realized that the only person who can really be there for me all the time is myself. I need to work on my bad habit of comparing myself to my sister and others and start taking better care of myself. This video has helped inspire me and helped guide me in the right direction. I hope that anyone who sees this is able to develop healthy habits and take care of themselves.

I've never had a video hit home like this.. i took an year off and all the things in your routine reflect EXACTLY what ive been doing.. i need a change

This is such an important video! Thank you for speaking about not feeling fine!

I have subscribed to so many youtubers that give off the same vibe as your content. I try my best to be productive as much as I can but it only lasts for a day, I’m so glad you created this video because I really need help staying productive and sort of “getting my life bck” for the very next day when I feel sluggish.

ahh Jem you’re such a queen and i love your videos so much!! 🥰 you’re so aesthetic and amazing and i wish my channel was as amazing as yours 💖 don’t forget we’re always here for you

I been suffering from depression anxiety for 6 years I keep trying to get out of it but I keep failing but I am gonna keep trying Bts has helped me give some happiness and I am still learning to love Myself I hope I get there 💜❤️

I relate so much to this, oh god. Since I can remember, I have always wanted to change and have a better lifestyle. I remember that I read one time something like "the life you have is the life you work for", meaning that you have to do things for you in order to make your life better or worse, you decide. It just scared me the thought of what my lifestyle would look like in 10 years from now on, 5 years, or even a year. I really want to put my life together, but I feel like if I try, I would always end up in the same place..

this really got me back on track.. I'm so thankful for this

when i say this is exactly how i’m feeling, gosh it’s literally like someone took how i was feeling and put it into exact and perfect words. woah

you know what, you're very brave person to make this video, let people know how you genuinely feel. most people only show what's superficial, i think everyone wanna show the only good side. but by showing this, we're actually not less like a person... I'm glad you're making this, I'm sure we can get over this together :")

the beginning of this video truly made me cry for you and resonating with the questioning self-worth and my own abilities. but hopefully listening to this helps me make my way to getting my own life back together. and i think i'm speaking for all of us watching right now but you're amazing at what you do and we can really see you work so hard, but you're human :) good luck jem!!

Thank you, this video helped me to finally express my feelings to my family and friends. I never opened up about my depression and anxiety, but you opened my eyes and I realized, that I need to talk with somebody and have to starting making changes in my life. For this, thank you so much! You mean so much to me!

I can really tell how passionate u are about your videos and editing, I felt like watching a movie here, keep up the good work!! im currently re-watching all of ur vids btw hehe

This video was so needed. This has helped us in opening up to ourselves and others and face ourselves. This was much needed. Thank you for creating this.

amazing video, i feel we don't talk enough about how toxic our brains can be to us. i am currently just going through days, ignoring my attempts to plan days and have a routine. i am skipping online classes and mindlessly scrolling through twitter and reddit. i don't really mind a day of entertainment but i can't even read my mangas or watch films. just empty content on twitter. i can't play my piano anymore and i feel just tired. my boyfriend told me i'm suffering from burnout and sincerely i needed other people to realize this. currently trying to help myself, lots of love to you.

You are so beautiful to hear. It’s really rare to see youtubers like you out there. There something in the way you talk that is comforting. Thank you for creating this content.

Just wanna say already that this is so well edited. The audio while you do the routine in the beginning is very very good....

love you jem. you truly captured the same exact feeling, or rather lack of, that described parts of my life as well. i relate to you a lot, and i learned lots from this video which inspired me to go write something about these lessons :)

this video was touching in every way, the videography, ur words and u. sending u sm love!

I needed this. Thank you. 🥺

this video literally showed how I was been the past few weeks and it's quite rough pulling yourself to be productive or maybe create something that u usually love. I hope you're doing okay now and thanks for sharing some tips 💗 literally love how this vid shows how some of us are feeling right now.

Thank you so much for making this video Jem. It was really refreshing to find a productivity channel as amazing as yours be so transparent about how staying on course with that can still be a struggle for productivity youtubers like you who always seem to have their life together. This video gave me some advice on how to steer my own life back to a productive course and in a way watching it didn't feel like a condemnation towards my very unproductive life the way other channels as amazing and inspiring as they are did. Thank you so much for making this again!

I totally understand how you felt, taking a gap year to pursue art was the hardest decision for me . I doubted myself so much after graduating high-school and I feel like a lot of teens are going through this cause the society has reached a standard where everyone needs to get a good degree for a good job . And those who are afraid and cannot take on that pressure gets lost in life. When they don't face their obstacle then they just go on auto pilot mode.....if you are going through this, know that everyone reaches a point where they doubt themselves. Just stop overthinking so much, try to share what you feel to someone , let it all out . You will feel a lot better. Just a another thing I learned , Stop just stop asking advice from others, yes you will ask them but do not take their advice on a personal level . Your life is yours and you need to take your own decisions on what you are gonna do . Don't let others inuence what you are gonna for the most part of your life . For me following Jordan peterson was such a life changing experience. Check him out if you can or try to read his book 12 rules of life .

i'm so thankful for people who create content like this. inspired and grateful for your vulnerability

I really needed this.. It's exactly what I'm going through rn

girl same! i really love this video and it made me realize that i am not alone.

This video is so helpful. I've been going through a tough time recently, when I feel like none of my other friends have. Especially when you were talking about how people comment on how you always seem so put together, but you don't feel put together ... I relate to that so much. Your vunerability has helped me realize I'm not alone. Thank you! We'll both get through this :) 💕

to be honest, i feel similar in a way that you've mentioned. ive been letting myself down for a couple of years and i realized from the past 3 months on how much i mislead myself into consuming, procrastinating and ignoring my issues and my passions. its a hard road to start becoming better than who i used to be but i remind myself to not be scared to take that initial step. even sometimes failing miserably at it is what will help me in the long run. good luck on your journey and everyone else's.

You are the bravest girl I have ever seen. It’s ok to cry. It’s ok to have unproductive days. It’s ok to get sad. That is a phase. I am glad and super happy that you made effort to change this. You will get back on track. There is always light at the end of your path. Sweetheart, just to let you know, I am always here for you, to support you. Good Luck, stay safe and I love you! 💓😘

ily jem

Honestly, I think most of us fell into this sort of thing because we were grieving- everything changed so fast with very little warning. Grief takes a while to process.

The cinematography in this video though. True artistry. I’ll pick up Big Magic, in desperate need of a creative boost right now.

Hi Jem - It takes courage to share your personal story to anyone outside of yourself. I am sure your story is resonating with many of your audience and will bring them comfort to know they are not alone. We underestimate the power of storytelling and it's ability to connect people with each other. Life has many highs and many lows, we need to be honest, kind and loving to ourselves, to seek help when needed and ultimately know it is okay to not be okay. It is a process and we should focus on taking one step at a time and do what is right for you - no comparison with others allowed x :-) Well done on doing what you needed to for yourself x

i completely understand how you feel. i was in a rut like that for the longest time. i didn't feel any joy from doing anything, everything felt the same. the days blended into eachother. nothing shined how it used to. but ever since i started redoing my room, making it a brighter and happier place, things started to shine again. i started communicating with my friends again, i started trying to improve. again. i am stuck in ruts like that from time to time, and sometimes i don't even know why. like right now. this morning i was going fine but now im not too sure. and i don't know why. but i know things will improve one day. it's all a matter of time.

The cinematography in this is * chefs kiss*

This video is going to be so helpful... Especially now.💆‍♂️

I’m growing through the same phase when depression hits you, but you actually make small changes step by step, you’ll be closer to your goals and success.

i've been here since the beginning and looking at you grow as a creator has been one of the sweetest and purest things ever, it just shows that you're a human too and people sometimes forget that and start to associate you like everything in your life is perfect just for what you have and do, when is totally not like that, looking at you talk openly like this really makes me realize im not alone when it comes to this kind of thoughts. i took a year off as you, to figure out myself, what i wanted, who i was and what i wanted to be, that year it really made me realize there's no time enough to know who you are and how you want things to do, is a work in progress and you have to keep up with it all the time just trying to do your best and sometimes we have our highs and lows, but that's what is about, not trying to lose outselves. You will do okay sweetie and as you still here, you're doing amazing and im always in love with everything you put up for us, love you💗🦋🌈🌟

okay this video is sooo good like jem is back, very aesthetic

I am in a big slump right now! I have no routine and keep wasting my time on my phone, spending about 8 hours each day. I feel so useless since all of my exams are cancelled and have no sense of purpose which is taking a toll on my mental health. However, this video motivated me to do better and actually make the most out of this situation. Thanks Jem 💕

I grew up watching you, and I still look up to you. I'm proud of you.

I relate so much. I haven't been myself for so long, I spent so much time crying yesterday and sometimes I don't even know why... I even lost my passion for hobbies I used to enjoy. i feel like quarantine is affecting a lot of us collectively, at least we have each other

i was gonna write omggg dont cry ily and stuff but i couldnt stop myself writing the editing is so lit luv u jem💖💖

I've never watched any of your videos before, this just popped up in my recommendations and I'm so grateful it did. I really needed this advice. The way you portrayed your message was beautiful, your editing and cinematography is 10/10

the cinematography is gorgeous

somedays, i want to just go fuck it to the world. i want to stop time, i want to stop the world from spinning. i want to just go, “fuck this, i’m going to live inside a cave in the mountains and become an artist that barely survives and i just want to be _happy_ .but realistically, i’m stuck. without a passion, without any talents. i’m lonely. and i don’t know where to go next

i commented on your video about taking a year off saying i did the same thing. I thought that was the best decision for me but now i actually feel so bad that i did nothing i wanted. instead i got myself into troubles and just lost so much hope. i needed this video so much, maybe i still have time to try

this video made me feel less alone and alienated, thank you for making such a raw and unpretentious video xx

the montage in the beginning of the video was the best representation of how i've been feeling in quarantine too

the editing is PHENOMENAL!

I love the story of this video . We here for you!!❤️❤️

Sometimes u feel not good enough, not worth it and etc. Its okay, feel everything u felt cuz u are a normal human being. After that, wipe those tears, get up and be you. Get confident again, conquer the world. Life is short. So life to the fullest. You are amazing on your own ❤️