How is Dating a Woman Different from Dating a Man? 

As always, we'd love to hear about your experiences - how does being in a lesbian relationship feel different from being in a straight relationship, and what are the pros and cons of each?

I'm bi and have dated two women. I was really surprised at how familiar everything is with women. It seems obvious I know but it was just so surprising to me. Like there wasn't a language barrier and the anatomy and emotions and everything was just like oh yes this is familiar and easier to get comfortable. With men, its just unfamiliar which is fun in its own way.

I think the relationship between two women is softer because we know each other's bodies well, and we are also much more affectionate when it comes to sex.

I'm a lesbian from South Korea. I have been in a long term relationship with a man before I actually fell in love with this woman. So encountering her was the moment I realised that I was actually gay. Even though South Korea has not yet legalised gay marriage there are a lot of gay population. And it is easy to see them online in social networking sites however they are quite invisible outside. This is perhaps because we have to disguise ourselves. I feel like sex with women is really actually better than sex with men. But of course being in a relationship with men has the obvious advantage of being able to be more open about one's relationship, ljke introducing your boyfriend to your friends or parents whereas when I have a grilfriend, I have to conceal that fact... not to mention the exclusion from many legal protections marriahe offers... it is sad to be constantly worrying about the uncertain future of this relationship and the fact that i have to conceal my sexual preference to those that matter to me such as my family...

Being with a woman is like wandering into an unexpected but exquisite paradise for the senses. The smells that intoxicate you and overpower you when she comes close, the sensuality of being caressed on the back of a wrist or the extent of an arm aimlessly and for no reason and without needing to go any further, the way she bites or touches her lips when she looks at you when she thinks you can’t see her, the textures, colours and quality of high thread cotton sheets in her bed, the way she rests her head on your lap when watching TV as she holds and caresses your legs… None of the men I have been with ever did that…I suspect if women knew what it feels like to play for the other team, many would switch…😉

Being with women is more romantic And worthy to spend your time on it

I like that you are cuddling all the time! It is really visible that you are close emotionally

Well, I wasn't lucky enough to get a long term partner, but speaking of dating, the thing I noticed is that I never paid for a date with a guy and I never wanted to pay. But when I went out with a girl, we were like racing to pay for each other and we both wanted to do it😂

The only really negative thing I've found with dating women is other people's perspective of it, everything else that's negative comes down to the person as an individual. I'm a lesbian who has dated men before, I found that with men it was so restricted, and also the whole trope about them paying for things just isn't true. The men I've been with hardly ever wanted to pay for anything, or if we went to restaurant they would prefer that we pay for our own. There was a kind of bitterness from them about it, and don't get me wrong I don't care about the people I date being rich, it's not about showing off with money it's about simple kindness and generosity. With women they are much keener to pay for things, though I always make sure I pay for things for her too. I would feel guilty if it was just her paying for things. The other thing is that the gender roles were definitely there, though I always felt like the guys wanted me to nurture and look after them. It's funny because apparently the man is supposed to be the provider and protected (not that I think it should always be like that!), strangely it was the opposite and I almost felt like I was playing the masculine role in that respect. With women I always feel like the more feminine one even though I have an androgynous style and personality, it's relieving because i feel that I can be vulnerable and gentle around them. I feel like we're on an equal plain, and can talk for hours about anything! Communicating is definitely my love language. With men it was always about trying to show that you're strong, you can deal with everything, you can do all the work, emotionally support them and not talk about your own emotions so as not to annoy them. Even if they don't actually tell you they don't want to talk they never look like they're listening, and even when they're listening they still don't understand! They don't take any interest in what it's like to be a woman at all. With women you can just tell them. Also sex with men is awful, but then again I'm a lesbian and never felt attracted to them I just thought it was what I had to do. It's crazy when straight or bi women agree with me on that, I thought it was just because I'm gay!

I’ve dated both men and women and with some women it’s way more emotional. The sex with women is wayyyy more intimate and just 10x better than with a guy. I was with one girl and when we had sex I would be soooo turned on and I don’t think I actually ever came but it didn’t matter cause it was just that good!!! I have been in a good relationship with a guy before... but I’ve personally never enjoyed sex with them... so yea there’s that!! I would definitely say I’m more into women!!

I completely 100% agree with everything you just said. All of my ex partners were very respectful and considerate in sex, no orgasm gap there - I did make sure to ask for it and even guide them, but had to guide the women too until they learned my body - but a big difference is the gender politics. A lot of men have felt insecure next to me as I am quite big, strong and smart. I even had one say "you are too smart for me". None of my ex girlfriends thought like that, they admired me for my brains and my strength. On the flip side, one major difference between a straight and a gay relationship, is the confidence. Straight men are not taught to doubt anything, and even when they are young, like teens on early twenties, they feel good about being in love. Bi or gay women however go through a huge phase of crippling self doubt and hate and internalized homophobia because of society, and they have to unlearn that before they have an actual mature relationship. I went to a lot of dates with a loooooot of women that were still flobbing around, trying to accept themselves and falling in love with straight women and wanting all the ' cursed love ' drama to feel good in dating. I am not at all dramatic, I never was, and I also never went through that phase, I love my sexuality and I've had amazing relationships so I often cannot connect with bi and gay women because of that.

this kind of content should be also a podcast

Being gay is so natural.

my first relationship with a woman confirmed to me that i'd never be in a relationship with a man again. from my experience there's always been a much deeper connection, love and mutual respect with a woman.

Loved this. I’ve only dated men due to my upbringing, however I really want to go out with women and have always been attracted to them. Just from my experience, men most of them seem only interested in their own pleasure even if you are not being pleasured; & even if it hurts you physically. I know not all men are that way, so I’m not trying to offend anyone reading this. Thank you for your thoughts on this subject. I’m hoping that now with things opening up more, I can finally start dating women. Take care dearies 💜

I've had relationships with men and I never was happy with men because I knew I was gay. I did it because society is more accepting of heterosexuals. I decided to come out and I've never been happier. I love women. Making love with women is way more sensual. Women are beautiful. I can relate to women way better than I can to men. I'm a dyed in the wool lesbian.

I was married to am awesome guy who was amazing about sex and who did not need to be in charge (like other men I had dated). But, the emotional aspect of sex with a woman is just a whole different level!

I love (but actually it's sad) Lilians laughing when Alexis said "who the hell is gonna whistle on a straight couple"

I'm bisexual and started my first real relationship with a lesbian a year ago after dating men most of my life. I will never go back even if things don't work out, especially now that I hear that some of the things I love with my partner are common in lesbian relationships. The deep conversations, the inside jokes, the fact that they actually listen to me, the level of respect for my career and ambitions because I'm not held to the standards of traditional femininity and expected to have my ambitions come second to the man's ambitions. I feel like we're a team more than anything. But at the same time, we're facing a society together that doesn't respect a woman's body autonomy...so I have actually been groped in the presence of my partner BECAUSE they aren't a man.

I’m in my first relationship with a woman and have only dated men before this so this is super helpful to me 💜 thank you!!

I've dated both men and women and prefer being with women. Women are more receptive to my interests and on gender and sexuality and sex. They're also more attentive to my needs that are outside of the male gender role (being a provider, etc.)

For me a big difference was communication, I felt a lot more able to communicate my feelings with women honestly, whereas with men I always felt I had to ‘tone down’ my emotional side and often worried that they’d be exasperated if I cried too much or got self conscious. Like you say, individual personality plays a big role no matter someone’s gender, and with this particular point there’s probably a splash of internalised misogyny on my part, but this was something I experienced as different. Love your content Alexis and Lilian, big hugs! X

I personally it doesn’t matter weather man dating woman, man dating man or woman dating woman as long as you have happy within the relationship you in that’s all that matters

Neve been in a series or long term relationship but with dating I noticed something with men most of the time I'm nervous and I feel as if I'm not truly fully myself while with women most of the times I'm so calm and can easily be myself and I also feel more safe with them 💙

Such a straightforward conversation. Thank you, as always!

Soooo I’ve just started dating women and omg it’s terrifying. I’m not sure if anyone else gets this, but it’s so hard divorcing the image that I grew up with only seeing men and women together, to how I actually am feeling at the moment. I’m bi so obviously this could go either way, but I don’t want to close myself off from the possibility of meeting a woman because I’m too attached to the image that I was shown. So many other factors I have to consider with dating a woman. Like the image of what a family can look like, like whose gonna wear the wedding dress 😂, how are we gonna be when we’re both pms-ing, how my mom could be saddened by the fact that the vision she had for my future marriage of dating life will be drastically different, and how I will be able to accept this new dynamic that is sooo different than with a guy. I’m so used to being ultra femme and having that balanced out with male energy, but I have this “curiosity” of how I could be with a woman. I’m scared shitless and I could all the help I can get🙏🏻😂

The world needs more openness that you two portray so well. Your sessions cover so many explicit but genuine areas of interest for those that are interested, which Is hard to find anywhere else. You are both relaxed and amusing in your talks that in turn relaxes me and informs me of what others are thinking too. Thank you, I genuinely feel that I would love to converse with you both as friends. Love and best wishes for your journey together. Emilia xx

Spent this morning binge watching your videos ❤️❤️❤️

I've only dated men. But I've dated different types. The things you talked about how it is to date a woman, I have that in some sense with my current bf. He is soft and takes care of himself. using moisturizer, don't smell bad etc. we also talk about stuff a lot. about if we unhappy in the relationship. what we can do better etc. I'm not attracted to woman but I am attracted to men that are more caring, more sensitive and actually care about their partner and all what that implies.

I can relate to you, Alexis, as I am 40, only been with men, but actually mostly attracted to females. Now I have no desire to have a man, and am in a long distance relationship with a gorgeous woman. I haven't told her that have no experience with women, as I'm scared that she may be turned off by that. When we meet, I'm gonna have to act like I know what I'm doing. Were you nervous your first time? Any pointers?

Sex for sure is waaaayyy better with a woman. Deeper connection too with a woman. Unfortunately gender stereotypes do still exist in heterosexual relationships but is getting better. Another great video and I'm so in love with Miso ❤️❤️❤️❤️🌈

I completely agree with everything you two said. Sex with women is so much better and deeper. Personally the only thing I miss about straight dating is the implied gender roles of who makes the move first and roughly what to expect. But I’ll get over it because I’m sticking with women lol.

I'm watching this video trying to get an idea how to date women. I've been dating men for so long and avoiding what I really feel like attracted with, so... I'm new here and I'm happy to hear you both 💗

omg i just realized that i have the same jacket as lilian, not gonna lie made me feel a bit proud. Gonna watch the video now 😅

Thank you for talking about this subject and good luck finding an apparement that you enjoy ! :) this is my comment to support this channel 😌

Oh my God I love this everything is so true and factual I've been with men I've been with women and I just can't get over how real and raw you guys are it's fantastic thank you! I'm right in the middle of not knowing where I belong because I don't know if I want to be with strictly with women or strictly with men but I'm leaning more towards women. You ladies are fantastic. I love you

I'm so jealous 😭😭😭 Everyone in the comments seems to have so much experience with women and here I am, I've been out of the closet ever since 2018 and I've never had a girlfriend and the only person that was interested in me wasn't my type...

With a man it's more of an urgent biological function which needs to be satisfied. It's all about his release. Not much about the beauty of the connection. It's often perfunctory rather than loving. Release and go to sleep. He doesn't seem to require much of anything more meaningful. Ego and release and if "it's" really big. I find most men are poor lovers. Women are more sensitive in pysical and emotional connecting and relate on a deeper, more caring level . There are occasional exceptions with men but they are not that common,

Being with women is hands down wayyyyy better in all ways. That being said i am really only attracted to them at this point in my life.

Thank you so much for this video. All of these questions were things I have been asking myself. It is so raw and real to see other women's experiences. Your videos have allowed for self acceptance and the courage to move forward in exploring my sexuality!

I miss your shaved head style!! It so worked on you Lilian!

Hi ok Alexis Lilian This is the first time I have commented on your Channel. I think your really great value and helpful. I'm have always known that I have more affection for women than men. I haven't actually been in a relationship with a woman because I haven't until now at nearly 50 had the confidence to make a move on anyone. Maybe I just enjoy admiring from a far.

I'm so glad that I am bisexual!

Totally Love Your channel!!❤ The chemistry between the 2 of you is awesome 😍!! May the 2 of you grow old together! 😁... I'm all the way from South Africa 🇿🇦🇿🇦

Cuteness overload , love these two !

It’s true that being with a guy..you are more limited in what your role “should” be…with women you can feel more feminine..masculine..and everything in between.

My female friend told me that being in a relationship with a woman is like a "dance" due to their complex nature emotionally, and dating men is more simple and straight forward.

Being with a woman it's amazing. It's romantic, intimate and soo good. I enjoy everytime. With a woman its like we understand each other and you become so free and ofcourse you never worry about being pragnent,you just going with the flow. So far it's awesome😙😙.

i've never been in a full relationship with either but as many of the comments say with women the familiarity with another woman just feels so rich. out of the men i've been involved with, two come to mind as being v sweet. respectful, kind, interesting, attentive physically. but it just does not compare to the connection with women to me. i had a date with a person (pronouns they/she) and we literally held hands on our second date walking to the metro. i never had experienced something like that it was magical. ever since then not sure what reason i'd have to date a man again. 😹on our third date they invited me over and cooked for me since i was sick. it was like a sleepover but gay haha. everything felt so sweet and safe.

First date with a woman are longer than with a man. "Who should pay" is also not very much of an issue in a first date with woman

Two weeks without a new video from you guys... feels like eternity... :)

you cought my german ass offguard with the "tschûss" i even looked out of the window to check if someone was there lmao

Super interesting discussion as always!

Thank you for speaking positively on the realm of ZEE‼️💯English pronouns being such a tag! My ‘love of my life’ wish list? Gender is dead last and uh male plumbing replicas never go soft🙋🏼‍♀️

Miso is THE CUTEST ❤️ Also for me this was a super interesting video! I am a bi woman, have been in relationahips with men and women so it was fun to see if we agree on this with y'all (or with Alexis haha). Spoiler: mostly we did lol

Oh Miso is so so cute and love the information and yes living your true life and being with woman is a deeper connection thank you for this great video

I understand what Alexis is saying. I also still prefer a woman especially the woman I’m in love with.

thank you for sharing this :)) y'all are too cute together!

You two make my heart ❤️ sing 🎶🙌🙏🦋🌸

I think is really interesting to talk about this kind of things, i love your videos

men & women are both cool. I like the same personalities traits in both genders just a diff look & body. I find w men I’m less picky like as long as they’re not too skinny I’m good but w women there’s a certain type I like. Regardless of gender I have to admire you in some way. Like I’m happy you’re my person bc I think you’re cool

Do you often hear the heartbeat from your girlfriend?

I have mostly been in relationships with men but am now in one with a woman. I LOVE so much about it. The only thing I'm finding a bit challenging is the emotions. She thinks I'm not available for her challenging emotions. And I feel she is kind of all over the place when it comes to receiving mine. Maybe this is because I am used to men. And I have been with a lot of men I can walk on. IDK?! But I LOOOOOOOVE the sex and physical intimacy. Much prefer that piece with women at this point!! Highly recommend. 10/10 lol

You both are very informative 🎉

Everything you've said rings true! 👍👍👍 🇬🇧 🇬🇧

I appreciate this vulnerability. Beautiful

If it is so much better with a woman, than done deal!

Yes, dating a man you do get rushed out faster including being told we're leaving in 5 minutes ready or not.

100 marks for this video! Alexis’ comments are spot on. And she’s damn right. Sex with a woman is way more pleasurable physically and emotionally. From flirting and foreplay, and right up to orgasm - both women can experience a much more intense sexual high and more often than not, electrifying orgasm, than straight sex.

All smiles watching this video 😄

Lex so bubbly

The depth and intimacy of being with another woman is unparalleled. Surely it's due to socialisation. However men simply do not do the emotional work. I've always found relationships with men, though fun, have been skating on the superficial surface of life

omg killed me on "until your D vibrates and rolls around..." 😂😂😂

Hi A and L will I get a reply if I ask A question,?

Lion dog! 💖

This made me laugh out. X

LOL! I did get a lot of catcalling with my male-presenting cis-male partner. And my current, cis-male partner has long hair and gets misgendered often, so I feel a little bit of that unwanted attention from others.

perfect video😍😍😍

I realized n learned that men often don't care about women's feelings wthr straight or bi...or maybe is it because we ain't good or we like to rush during sex..coz women in general aren't pleased with what we've been doing to them...yes not all of us but most of us...are we shy in asking n be given advice or we just bossy n think we know better???just asking

People people people, normative gender roles will never change in society. That doesn't mean other ones or neutral ones cannot augment or come alongside. There's room enough for everyone.

It’s not. It’s better.

"unless you actually want to get pregnant then it's sad" 😭

Nice couples

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="243">4:03</a>-<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="250">4:10</a> oop i find it to be the opposite...lmao

Yeszz

i want Miso

I've only ever been attracted to women. Was into girls long before I started transitioning and I still am now. Had a few girlfriends in high school but nothing happened with them beyond kissing. I always felt pressured to be this manly cis-het guy who scored with all the girls due to comp-het. My great-grandmother kept badgering me about when I was ever going to bring a girlfriend over to meet her, get married, and have kids from my teen years until the day she died. Since starting antiboyotics, I've never gotten any shit for being a lesbian, at least not offline. I've yet to start dating women as a woman, but have been thinking of getting myself out there. Any woman who wants to be with me had 1) better be able to lock horns with me upstairs, and 2) better like parrots. I have a feather-baby who demands attention. But I have always considered lesbian relationships purer than cis-het ones.

Can you do a Motherland Fort Salem reaction video?

Peooe who are saying it's softer/less animalistic with girls.. though the former may often be true and is undoubtedly one of the greatest appeals... If it's always like that with your partner... Well either one a'yous is boring or you haven't screwed with the right woman. Either way, something is missing!

Mmm I see what everyone is writing here....for me it's a little different...I don't know if it's privilege but uhm dating a guy is less difficult,women are so emotional and I get too scared to hurt or break them...the sex is also emotional but sometimes i d love it more intense but dildo after a while just hurt and scar my skin...and obviously there is the money privilege where some guys are happy to be the main ones paying. Expect all these i know for certain that i love women more but it's just difficult to adjust into it and accepting that part of me...and yes I have tried... I don't know why I m not as content about it, I have told close friends and said i m bi tho i m sapiosexual and like mainly women...I am quite confused yeah, I can't immagine myself going back to a man, however I can't immagine myself being fully content with a woman too

I'm curious to know if any women would consider a relationship with a trans woman. My experience is no.

im hetero but i lived together with female friends and omg it's so much better. living together with my boyfriend is super chaotic and stressful

😄👍

I just realized how WIDE Alexis's mouth is. When I was in HS, a classmate told me he had heard that lesbians have BETTER sex than straight couples. I had thought I heard LILLIAN previously declare herself bisexual. I guess I was wrong. Gay men say that part of the reason they enjoy sex so much is that a man knows how ANOTHER man's body functions and feels. It's funny what Alexis said about men being "quick". It makes me think about what my very Str8t mother says about going shopping with men. "They're always so impatient", she says. She sees that same trait in me....LMAO..

How tall are u two

Can you tell me what type of your dog? (sorry my poor english)

👍🙏👍

💯💯❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😄😄

women are more emotional than men but if men becomes emotional to women either women dump them or they are considered simps. thats the difference

😎😃😊😜😍😘💖