How to Santa Without the Lies 

Once the Santa was no longer believed in, I explained that now that she was a big girl, it was time for her to become Santa for her cousins and other children who believed. Being Santa was a very important job because Santa is all about magic, happiness, kindness, surprises, and fun. So we went to the store and picked 1 big gift request that her cousins had on their list and a few fun small items. We paid for them, she wrapped them and labeled them from Santa. Then she got to watch them unwrap their gifts and saw their joy and excitement. After they left she told me that she likes being Santa, that it made her feel good.

When my nibbling were around 6-9 years old, I asked them what they wanted from Santa this year. One of my wise little loves looked really concerned, but didn’t elaborate right then. Later, she came to me privately and said something along the lines of “Auntie Claire, Santa is a symbol for being generous, not a real person. I’m really sorry.” Sweet girl thought she just ruined my Christmas! I told her how wise she was, and how grown up it was to save a “hard talk” with me for when we could have some privacy. Sending all the love to the parents out there who are doing their best to raise these tiny human whirlwinds!

I grew up knowing Santa wasn't real as a child. But my family made sure that Christmas always felt special to me and my brother! We drove around neighborhoods to see the lights, said hello to Santa if we saw him in the mall, and enjoyed putting up decorations. If you need Santa to make Christmas magical, then there needs to be a rethinking about what makes Christmas truly special.

I'm 31 and my mum still writes "from Santa" on my gifts....she's always let us know that "Santa" is just the spirit of giving at Christmas ❤❤❤

I had the magic shattered for me. So in raising my daughter I told my daughter that Santa was the spirit of Christmas that works through all of us. That in our house, I’m Santa. In someone else’s house, it’s their parent. So each person gets what their grownups can give. It might not be big, or it could be huge. It’s ok that it’s different. We don’t need to tell any of our friends that we know about Santa. That’s also the job of their grownups. We can still go get pictures with the guy in a red suit. Oh, and your Santa loves chocolate chip cookies and hot cocoa.

"The spirit of giving is a celibration of all the nice things you did this year" Quote of the year right here

Lol. "Don't watch this with kids in earshot," The phone is literally over my baby. I think it's fine, she won't remember.

Before finding out I was autistic (at 30 mind), I grew up with the label "gullible", because I didn't understand the logic behind most lies, and I certainly didn't expect people I had been introduced to and was expected to interact with regularly to lie to me. So it took me a loooooong time to realize Santa wasn't real the way he had been described to me by my parents, friends, stories, songs, and movies. I had a whole meltdown about it. Everyone should definitely make their own decisions, but at least for our family, I plan to explain Santa as a cultural and mythological figure. If my kids decide they want to suspend their belief and play like Santa is real, I will 100% play too. But if they decide it's not worth their mental and emotional spoons during a time of year that is *very* socially busy. That will be fine by me too.

I love J.R.R Tolkien's Letters from Father Christmas. Tolkien didn't intend for it to be published. It was the letters he wrote, with his elaborate world building and love of language invention, just for his children as the persona of Father Christmas and Polar Bear. His grown-up children decided to collect these special private letters and share them in a book. It is so magical, but it is difficult to gauge if someone is still young enough to enjoy the whimsy of the tales while knowing these letters were not written by Father Christmas, and it's a glimpse into the Tolkien family's lives.

I can't really remember what and how my parents told me about Santa. I just remember one moment 100% believing he was real, and another accepting that he's a role that parents and people around the world filled. I never felt betrayed or lied to about Santa and I have no idea how my parents made that so.

I was always acutely aware of how Santa gave huge, fancy gifts to rich kids, but not poor kids. It’s a messed up way to internalize the idea that rich people are somehow morally superior, since those kids must have been so “good”! Nothing more American than that 😂

You are definitely a very naturally funny person but referring to your children as a "sex trophy" is one of the funniest and most accurate things I've ever hear you say...I laughed about that for several minutes...

I'm pleased with how I did Santa with my kid. Santa was around, we watched the movies, got excited when he was little - Santa had his own gift wrap, tags, and handwriting (that's how it was blown for me). Santa brought a medium gift, a book, and a stocking; you could open those immediately upon waking, no waiting. When my son was very little, if he said anything about Santa I only ever told him "Santa was about caring about other people, and being excited together, etc, etc". I never once told him Santa was real. ever. When he was 8 the news broke at school just before Christmas and he came to ask me, straight up "so I heard Santa's not real" and then followed up immediately with "Wait, no, don't tell me, we can talk about this after Christmas just in case". LOLOLOL

this topic was SO timely. My youngest, she's 8, has know for a few years that Santa was mom and that the elves only moved when mom had a good idea. She started with a hunch and has made her way to this point. Lol. This was the FIRST year though, that she flat out asked. I was honest (in a creative way) and she has embraced it. She's setting up elves in a creative way to surprise her older sister in the morning and really getting into the "find the elf hat" game the next day. She's SO excited and it has definitely re-magicalized???, (its a word, I swear. Lol.) the holiday season. We ALWAYS play along with the magic. My oldest girls (13 and 19) have always had fun with it. I don't care what anyone says. My kids don't feel lied to and they grow into the facts behind the magic....it actually creates a bit of magic on its own when we can all play along knowing its all just fun.

Being part Dutch and living in Belgium with a Dutch mother and a Belgian father, I grew up with other Santa and Sinterklaas, aka Saint Nicholas. When my daughter was small, I decided to go with the ambiguous route. “I’ve never seen him, but there ate plenty of things we don’t see that are there and that are nice. So why don’t we celebrate what the Holiday means and see what it brings?”

This hit hard for me, as this is the first Christmas my oldest doesn't "believe". I think I'm going to show this to him as it's akin to what we've tried to explain to him over the years, though much more eloquently put. Thank you.

The whole “Santa thing” was fun for me as a child! I loved it, and for me, it was magical. When I became a parent, being Santa was just as magical. We were just starting our lives, and had to be really creative with gifts. Yes, I was that parent who made “Reindeer tracks” in the flower beds and yard, and spent the better part of an hour flinging jingle bells tied to curling ribbon with at least one dangling from the rooftop that could be seen from the window. (The bells and ribbons had fallen as the jolly guy left in haste on his way to his next stop. I took bites out of the carrots left for the flying reindeer, and my husband gobbled cookies (leaving crumbs as evidence of Santa sampling them) and chugged the milk (leaving enough for the cats to fight over after we had gone to bed) Do I feel bad for perpetuating a lie to my kid for years? NOPE. Not in the slightest. When I hear my son tell his friend’s kids about the bells and the hoof prints and see their little faces light up, it was worth it, because I know that I created a memory that he carries in his heart to this day. It worked for us. That’s good enough for me.

My parents literally told us that they paid Santa to bring presents. As a way to hand wave any inequality or people who don't celebrate Christmas. Santa was basically a personal shopper and delivery service.

My mom always asked me if I believed in Santa. When I would say "yes", then she would say "then he's real" My family also went out of their way to make it memorable. I don't remember any gift Santa got me, but I do remember being a tiny tot at my grandma's house, eagerly anticipating Santa's arrival, and hearing the "hooves" on the roof. 20+ years later, and I can appreciate the effort my parents went through to make it special

It’s interesting that this is just the same way that my mother of blessed memory explained Santa. Also, my very orthodox Jewish grandfather (also of blessed memory), who was a taylor, loved children and dressed as Santa in the local department store. His outfit was red velvet with real fur and his boots and belt was of expensive leather-the whole Santa suit was truly taylor made. He truly exhibited the spirit of Christmas. So, if anyone says to me that Santa isn’t real, I say, “Yes, he’s real. He’s my grandfather, and he’s Jewish!”

As an almost 3yo my eldest was completely freaked out by the mall santa. We reframed it as "a man in a santa costume" and all of a sudden the anxiety dropped away as this fit the pattern of play he was familiar with. It stuck, we quickly moved to the idea that "The Santa Game" is where grown up's get to play pretend and plan surprises for their children. We never spoil the game for other families. We still do Christmas stockings ans read the night before Christmas. We did a few Santa photos when the kids were smaller. They knew that "What did Santa bring you" could be answered by any of the presents they received since it is just a social script for adults to show interest like "how old are you" or "who is your teacher this year". It worked for us but YMMV.

My brother and I always knew the truth about Father Christmas (have to call him that, sorry, will have my British passport revoked if I call him “Santa”) but my husband believed until he was IN HIGH SCHOOL and found out in a really embarrassing way - so we always agreed that our kids would know the truth. Well we ended up announcing that I was pregnant over Christmas and would you believe that my MIL picked a huge fight and MADE ME CRY when she found out that we weren’t going to do the Father Christmas thing with our child? She was appalled! Honestly the “Santa types” can get really weird about it, they are dying on that hill…

I really love this! I think I'll add this to my Dutch family story I plan to share. That story is about an old lonely man who started making toys for the village children for Christmas after his wife died. Late on Christmas Eve he would put these toys in the wooden shoes left on the stoop of every house with children. The children named this man Sinterklaas (roughly translated as "the good man"). When the man died the parents of these children kept the tradition alive to continue the magic of Christmas. Seriously my favorite Christmas story!

Growing up I believed in Santa. I still believe in Santa, the belief has just shifted. I knew that logically all the tales couldn't be true, but I didn't care. I thought up ways to catch a glimpse of Santa. I remember the whole body joy of Christmas Day, waking up to a living room full of presents and lights and decorations. Going outside to see the reindeer tracks and reading the note from Santa. The magic was real, it still is. I had a few years struggling to figure out my beliefs in Santa and Christmas, but I realized what you said. Santa is the spirit of giving, we are all Santa. I try my best to keep the magic alive for everyone, big or small, that I interact with. Working in a toy store the past few months has been a joy. I love to help parents with the "lies" that sometimes need to be told, and the sneakiness that needs to happen.

I'll never forget when I found out about Santa. A girl in our class kinda dropped the bomb on us of the Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny, Santa , etc. after she found her baby teeth and some gifts in her mom's room. I wasn't mad though. I was genuinely shocked my mom had made Christmas so magical when she was a single mother. It made me cry because I could see how hard she worked. ❤ After that we began being "Santa" to the angel trees in town and buying gifts for families and/or donating food. The reason for the season isn't Santa anyhow. ❤

‘Sex trophies’😂😂😂. I just found your channel and you made me laugh while I had taken a sip of coffee. Now my nose is caffeinated. This was such a nice ‘talk’. I love how my grandchildren’s faces light up with the decorations.

I was never upset at my parents for "lying" to me about Santa, nor did it make me lose my trust in them. Their dedication to playing Santa made for some truly magical Christmases. And when I found out it was them, it didn't feel like a lie so much as a disappointment. And from there I just appreciated how much they wanted to make my sister and I happy. Though I probably felt that way because my parents and I have had a consistent, strong relationship built on love and mutual respect and honesty where it really counts. But every family is different, and if some parents dont feel comfortable with that "lie", I get that. I just wish that kids had more of a filter so they didn't tell everyone in class that santa is fake and ruin the magic for others 😅

We do something very similar. We also have an elf but I mostly find him to be a useful tool because I don‘t always have all the spoons for cookies, decorating, and holiday magic and I find my kids are much more patient when they are waiting for an elf to do these things.

That was lovely. We raised our 2 (mid 20s now) kids with Santa as idea and St Nicholas as the origin. They were told that other families including their cousin believed differently. Amazingly they never spoiled it anyone.

I explained about Santa when my kids were big enough to understand. I taught them about St. Nicholas. We also explored the other legends like the Krampus etc. I tried to instill the idea of Santa and that while the Santa of Legend was just that, a legend, he was about kindness and selflessness. I tried not to lie, but informed my kids about the truth at an age appropriate level.

Thank you for talking about this!!! I love this approach. I refused to use a fake man to threaten my kids into “behaving” by watching them and knowing and then deciding if they “deserve” a gift or not. I tell my kids Santa loves everyone and doesn’t judge or punish. He wants to spread joy and love.

I didn’t make it much past 5 or 6 before I had the bubble of Santa and the Easter bunny popped. My mother explained it much the same way. Santa and the Easter Bunny remind us to be kind and generous and to share with others, during a part of the year when resources can be scarce. They encourage us to gather and spend time together when it’s easy to isolate or be isolated, to share food, and do some fun things and just enjoy the company of others.

When my kids were young I explained that adults like to play pretend too, but we don't get many chances to do that. So Santa, Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy were our chances to play pretend and put a little magic in the world, and in our lives. As they got older we incorporated ideas like giving anonymously just because we can, and it feels good. We would occasionally leave an unexpected gift for a friend or neighbour throughout the year. It worked for our family.

As a professional Santa Claus/Father Christmas [and soon to be Krampus] character actor, I have had this conversation many times. It all boils down to what you said, Santa is in all of us; that love for mankind that we want to pass on by giving part of ourselves in thoughtful gifts without the thought of reciprocity. It is better to give than to receive, it heals the heart to see that magic and light flicker up in the eyes of the one you give your gift to. I have had many kids ask Me if I was the "Real Santa", and like you said, I answer, "why yes I am. I am as real as you are," NOT because I am lying to kids, but I believe in the spirit of Santa Claus, the spirit of giving, of love, of kindness... I also answer the same thing when asked if I believe in Santa, because for the same reasons Ive stated here, I DO believe in Santa, because every parent from the millionaires to the poorest single parent; we are all capable of great good in our lives. Do I believe that I AM really THE Santa Claus? lol, no, Im not delusional. Every business owner, beggar, taxi driver, famous celebrity or athlete, we all are capable of great and miraculous change in the world around us, and it usually costs no more than a smile and a kind word, or an attentive ear. Most of the times when I am at an event and have kids that are dealing with terrible, adult issues like the loss of a family member or beloved pet, a terminal illness of a parent or even themselves, all they really want, deep down, is not that super expensive Lego set, but they just want someone to meet them where they are at on their journey, listen to them, and have some human compassion.

I found out about santa when i was 13. I was devastated. I cried the entire night.

I figured out Santa wasn’t real way before my mom was ready to tell me, I was just in the second grade. I just heard another kid say that Santa didn’t exist, that it was his mom that gave him gifts, so it clicked for me. When I told my mom I knew, she got a little upset that someone ruined it for me, but all she told me was not to tell my younger siblings. That I should let them figure it out. And I respected that because even though I didn’t cry or anything after finding out, I still felt bad knowing Santa wasn’t real, and I didn’t want to ruin it for my siblings in the same way. So every year I would still say that Santa was coming and would hype it up for my siblings, cause it made them happy and it also made ME happy, too. I wouldn’t say it was traumatizing for me to have been told Santa was real only for the gig to be up. It felt bad, but… I was fine. And it didn’t ruin the holidays for me, I still had many great Christmases after that. I guess it depends on the child.

That's pretty good! We did something similar: we taught the youngling from very early on that we can learn things about the culture and ourselves from stories, and that Santa is one of those stories. Now, as his understanding of stories changes, his ideas about Santa automatically come along for the ride. We can get into the mytho-historical stuff on years when he's interested. And when the holiday comes around we talk about Santa as usual, knowing the truth that sits right behind that talk (you know, like adults do all the time). It doesn't have to be reiterated every time since that would ruin the fun of pretending, but we know that when someone says "Santa brought you presents!" it's an exciting story we're telling *with everybody else*, and that there's real work holding that story up for good (and less good) reasons.

I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE this!! My girls are 16 and 18 now, but I wish I had this explanation years ago!

Love this. I'm a new parent and I've felt torn about Santa. I love folklore, Holiday traditions, and playing pretend. I volunteered to be my sister's toothfairy when I was 11 and went all out. I love Christmas magic ✨ but my mom made a couple mistakes with Santa. I was made to feel that if I didn't believe in him I was a scrooge/that good boys and girls believed in Santa. I asked a question about Santa when I was 8 and I don't remember what my mom said but I felt bad for asking. And I was young enough to still keep believing for another year. But I felt guilty and didn't ask if he was real again until I was 12. I knew he wasn't real for a few years but I was scared to ask!! So I said "mom, the Santa at our family Christmas parties isn't the real Santa, right?" And she was like 'SANTA ISN'T REAL SILLY!!!" Like I was stupid for believing... Even though a few years before it felt like I was in trouble for not believing!!! Don't force your kids to keep believing, they will probably slowly and organically figure things out and it's fine. There's not an age where you should "still believe in Santa". I'm going to introduce Santa to my kids but never imply that he's real, hopefully it will be like any other playful make believe thing you do with your kids. If they ask, I'll tell them the truth, but probably talk about how fun and important it is to pretend and tell stories like the one of Santa

I grew up with Santa. I wanted to go with the Dutch version of Santa for our kids, but my husband didn’t. We make Christmas really special for our kids with the compromise we came to. They love it as much as any other American kid with a family that celebrates the holiday. Even though our fellow Christian church members tell their kids about Santa we choose to focus on the Christ part of Christmas. We tell our kids all those Christlike attributes that surround the holiday come from Christ, and we tell them the story of Santa exactly that way, that it’s a story. A story other people tell their kids is real, “…so keep that part to yourself.” And so far it’s only now that kid number 6 is 5 that anyone has spoiled it for their friends. Thankfully the friend didn’t believe what was said. 😝

I used to think about this a lot!!! But then I thought about my childhood and of all the things that traumatized me and the “lie” of Santa didn’t even make the top 10 (I had a fairly happy childhood with minimal trauma). Then I thought if I’m so lucky to avoid traumatizing her in all the other ways and Santa does cause some issues, at least it’s something that most other people participate in so she’ll be able to work through it with others in therapy. It’s not some rare unique thing that she’ll have to go to a specialist for… I’ve landed on we will do Santa but without the surveillance and morality piece..that said.. she’s only 6 months old so it’s really easy to say all of this now. I’m sure it’ll be different and come with new challenges every year so I’m adaptable! Thanks for a great thoughtful video!

That was so sweet, it honestly felt like you were reading something out of a children's book, and I'm glad that you are trying to spread that kind of goodness into the world.

That's really cool that you are using Santa as a way of teaching your kids that the spirit of goodness and giving is something they can take part in to continue st Nicholas's legacy :) I'm from Poland which is a highly Christian country and I was never told that Santa was real - that I believe was the norm. We do celebrate St Nicholas or Świetny Mikołaj on Mikołajki where we participate in Secret Santa 🎅

I'm 19, with a 10 y/o brother who still believes. Me and my mom know that the end is likely near, and my dads just ready for it to be over. I'm not. I like still getting presents from Santa, even if I do know, I love planning and doing the elf, and I love Christmas eve, when my brother begs to sleep in my room with me, clad in our matching Christmas pjs that came in our elf in the shelf's Christmas Eve box, wakes me up begging me to go get our stockings (he's not allowed to leave my room until everyone is up and has coffee lol), asks me every 5 seconds if it's 7 am yet and if we can call our grandparents over for presents. And most of all, I love watching his eyes light up when he gets that thing he's been wanting all year. (Or in this year's case, the PS5 thats been at the top of his list every year since it came out) I know this could be our last Christmas that he believes, he'll be in middle school next year after all. So it's very bitter-sweet, but I'm just doing my best to make it a good Christmas for him.

My approach was similar to yours. Give a "Santa" gift and when he either finds out on his own or reaches middle school (12 ish), we tell him about the real Saint Nicholas and the value of giving to others as Saint Nicholas did. Nothing was earned to receive the gift, it was given specifically for the value of giving/receiving. Just as God gives love and forgiveness freely without having to earn it, because we are His creation. The gift is given "anonymously" because giving is not done with the purpose of receiving praise, but to show genuine kindness and care, humanity. Mom and Dad have been Santa and will continue to be Santa until he is capable enough to do the same for others. We give out of genuine love and care. Mine found out from another child at church when he was 6 or 7. Definitely younger than we were hoping, as the excitement of younger children is wonderful for the soul to see and because it is harder to explain the concept to a younger child and have them grasp it completely. Over the years of discussion though, they eventually get it.

I am normally chock-full of that good ol' holiday spirit, but have been finding myself struggling this year. And wouldn't you know it...this is exactly what my heart needed to hear ❤definitely going to keep this in my back pocket for when my boys are older

Thank you!! I love this so much. The way you have spoke about it was so digestible, and helped me articulate several ideas we have been working on in a more concrete way.

…you are friggin AWEsome & awe-inspiring! I love you Santa. Ummm…Gwenna! This is an incredible gift…YOU are an incredible gift! Happy every day, my friend! Celebrate!!! 💜

I almost choked on my tea at “my little sex trophies” Love it!!

"the more good we put into the world, the more that comes out" was something I needed to hear today, so thank you

This is epic. For those parents who want to break the news gently to their kids, who DO believe in Santa, here's a tip: Explain that "Santa" is the code name for a network of "agents of giving" who's job it is to bring happiness into the world. This is a year-round job (being kind, giving people compliments, etc) but the agents have the most freedom to act around Christmas, when they can give gifts to spread happiness faster. Who's kid hasn't wanted to be a secret agent?

Absolutely perfectly said. Merry Blessings to you and yours. 🎅 🧑‍🎄 🤶

To our very little kids we tell them parents buy the gifts and send them to Santa to deliver. When they ask questions I say I think Santa helps us make Christmas magical

This is almost exactly what my mother told me when i was 6 years old and a classmate told me Santa wasn't real.

That is an absolutely beautiful way to "do Santa". Thank you for sharing

Gwenna, this was YOUR BEST video yet! I’m looking forward to your next videos in Dec!

I love how you added thay warning in the beginning of the video because while I may not be a parent yet I still enjoy your videos and I live with younger siblings!

This could not have come at a better time for me personally. My little is questioning Santa this year. I was struggling with how to have that conversation. Now I think I have a better grasp on how I want to have that conversation. Thank you!

Im dying over the pom poms on your shoulders!!!! I look forward to everything you post!!!!! hope you and the fam have happy holidays!!

Gwenna, I love how you do it for your family. I am glad you found something to help keep the magic alive and keep it special for you and your family. My spouse and I never started Santa with our girls, my oldest started it when they started asking to get pictures with him at the mall. Santa would bring them toys, but it would always be small things, not the big and/or expensive things, those were from us. I started The Elf on the Shelf for our oldest because my mom passed away earlier that year it was hard on them as they spent lots of time with her. Our special elf came to us with a name already, Cherry. I named her after my mom, Cheryl. When they got old enough to learn the truth, I shared it all with them. They were a little sad at first, but then they got happy because then they could be the one helping Cherry to move around, they could help the Tooth Fairy. Something I wished I started earlier with my oldest and continued with my youngest, was to take each tooth and write about how they lost it on a snack bag. How brave they were, etc. I would date it and sign it "Tooth Fairy (Mommy)" My oldest had a few bags and they enjoyed the stories behind them. My youngest did as well.

This is incredibly helpful and beautiful. ❤️ Many thanks.

This is quite literally the best example of Santa I've ever heard. I knew in my adult brain that Santa wasn't real but I also knew that in my child brain Santa was real. The battle between him being a type of real vs him being straight up not real has confused me since i was young. This answered my question perfectly. Thank you

this was a great talk. good job. been folowing you for a while.. this is my fave so far

That was freaking awesome. I wish my autism could make as cerebral as you in dealing with my teens , young adults and full on adults. I could used your philosophy on gentle parenting literally years ago! Brightest Blessings Doll!

Beautiful ❣ Sending loads of good wishes from South Africa 🇿🇦 ❤ 🌲

Even before I had my daughter we left cookies out for Santa on Christmas Eve. Santa is the embodiment of the Christmas Spirit and therefore is real and important to keep alive. Santa lives in all of us.

Thank you for giving the disclaimer. My granddaughter was watching a video with me and they just started talking about it and I had to scramble to turn it off and explain why without over explaining.

My mother believed in honesty so I was never deceived about Santa,the tooth faerie and others I adore Xmas to this day.My greatest joy is in the giving😍

This was beautiful. I hope to some day introduce these concepts so eloquently.

Beautiful! Well said

This is wonderful because this is how I've always looked at it myself. I never got mad and accused my parents of lying. To be fair, my big brother told me Santa wasn't real when I was 5 and I just chose to believe anyway. You've put into words something I've always felt.

Thank you, Gwena. My little one is four this year, and I've struggled with this.

As a child and teen my mother did the typical you don't believe in Santa you don't get anything. I was furious when i realized she was lying. As a young mom I was not going to do Santa. At 5 my oldest promptly told me I was wrong yes there was a Santa. At that point i stopped saying there wasn't a Santa. When they were ready, or someone ratted them out, we talked about the spirit of Christmas. Not as coherently but with the same intent.

I like this short sweet take you have. We really try not to lie to our kids at all (no, we are not perfect). For Christmas we celebrate the birth of Jesus. We celebrate saint Nicholas on his proper day and we read books with Santa with the understanding that they are just stories. We make the day special but not with a bunch of gifts and we try to teach these life lessons always. Raising kids is hard and no one does it perfectly, I wish we could all give each other grace especially in how we all choose to handle Chirstmas (because some kid who doesn't believe will probably tell a kid who does and it's not because they are being mean or that the parent is a bad parent).

You are truly brilliant! 😊

This definitely feels along the lines of what my parents did, framing Santa as the spirit of holiday giving. As long as I can remember I never believed in Santa and whenever my parents talked about Santa there was always this air of not being serious. I did get gifts from "Santa" (always with my mothers very distinct handwriting lol) but they never tried to convince me that Santa was a real tangible person and I really appreciated that they straight up lied to me. The holidays still felt special even if I always knew that Santa was my parents.

This was such a beautiful explanation. I was very sad when I figured out that he wasn't real. Our son 9 starts to question it. So we prepare him to know the truth.

😭 I love you Gwenna God how I wish you had been making content while my daughter was younger I still implement tons of things I've learned from you I so wish I could have started them sooner but I can honestly say that me and my daughters relationship has grown because of you. So thank you so much for everything you do! ❤

I love this! I have 4 kids with one on the way. The two oldest are my stepsons, 11 and 9. (Live with us) They are special needs and still believe in Santa. I am a little concerned, I have tried to explain to them he isn’t a real person but could have been. The 9 yr old gets very upset about this. We haven’t given them presents from Santa for years. (There BM still does) they are very privileged to get two Christmases. I don’t feel it’s fair for them to get double presents from Santa when there are kids who don’t get any. How the heck does Santa afford a PS5. Why give him the credit all the time. What if we can’t afford something and they think they did something wrong to be put on the naughty list. I get very frustrated with the issue but really love how you explained Santa and going to try this out.

When I used to work in a Catholic school we always celebrated the feast of St. Nicholas which was Dec 6th. The teachers would tell the story about the saint and the kids would write letters to santa. Well we had two little Irish girls and the youngest told her classmates that in Ireland they don't have Santa, they have Father Christmas and some of the students got confused and upset thinking the kids in Ireland actually got gifts from the Jolly old elf while they got gifts from a different guy and the teacher had to explain that Father Christmas AND Santa Claus were both different names for Saint Nicholas! 😂

God, I love you. I love your mind. Your opinions are some of the best and most educational for me. Thanks for the vlog! I love it.

THANK YOU!!! I genuinely have no desire to teach my kid that Santa is man that actually exists, though I do love the magic of Christmas. To me, the magic is the twinkle of the lights, the love, the kindness, the coming together. That's the real magic. Why should I have to tell my kid some man from the North Pole sneaks into our house, but not if they act up? I've asked so many people I know for their opinion on the subject, &they all tell me I'd be stealing a part of my kid's childhood from them. That makes absolutely no sense to me. Thank you thank you thank you, for explaining exactly how I feel! It's good to know I'm not alone in thinking this way!!!

Love this ❤ we are all santa!

This os so beautiful, thank you.

You have a wonderful audiobook voice. 😍

I have never used the naughty list with my kids. I guess i have done what you are saying just in a little different way. I am raising 3 grandkids one is 5. Its so fun to spend this time with her

I grew up with Santa, I stopped believing at 12, and kept the magic alive for my brothers. I became first elf, and helped my parents wrap presents. I also helped more when both parents were working. I loved seeing my brothers faces light up on Christmas morning😊

I grew up with a Santa until second grade when a few of my friends said otherwise. I was crushed so I asked my mom and my siblings, who are six & eight years older, and they too said he was real! I decided my friend was wrong. I think in fourth grade my siblings found a way to get into our parents room, they kept it locked, where everything was being stored. On Christmas Day several of the things I saw were now wrapped with gift tags from Santa. That was it for me but I played along another year or two. I didn’t want my parents to get upset cause they worked so hard to keep Santa alive!!

We did something similar and it worked great. Love this.

I don't remember a time I truly believed in santa, meaning I learned before my fourth or fifth Christmas at most. It never bothered me that my parents snuck presents under the tree that my mom had meticulously wrapped and labeled as "From Santa." It never bothered me that those presents often used the same wrapping paper as the gifts labeled as from the family. I always knew it was all in pretend, but that was okay. I was a kid, after all. I loved playing pretend! And I loved what the pretend play of "Santa" created. It created wonder and mystery. It created joyous memories of me and my older siblings opening presents my parents somehow managed to afford. It allowed my older siblings to feel accomplished when I stood amazed at the first sight of the Christmas morning "scene" they helped my parents create. It created bonding moments as we spent the day with friends and family. It created a lived experience for an entire month that wasn't like anything else in the year. My parents didn't know I didn't actually believe in santa. I was the youngest, and I didn't want them to know. I had simply always loved what santa stood for. I wanted them to believe I believed for as long as possible to keep up the magic of the season. I believe I managed to keep it up until I was around twelve, meaning my older siblings were well into their teens and early adulthood by the time the magic of "santa" changed in our family. My childhood Christmases were the best I can remember, and I fully plan on continuing that when I have my own children.

I did NOT expect the “little sex trophies” bit but that was fucking hilarious😭🤣 thank you for this video, our daughter is 1 and she’s still too young to really care about Santa, but I do want to do Santa when the time comes but also want to avoid hurting her. So thank you for this.

I kinda figured it out on on my own but I was 13 when I stopped believing and my mom told me that we were Santa's helpers and that he needed our help to buy the gifts and wrap them. She told me he'll send her the list of what to get everyone lol

I told my child every family is different and thay some families like to pretend that santa visits their house. I asked if he wanted to pretend that Santa visits our house. He said yes. I said that santa brings toys to kids who dont have any and since he has plenty, santa can come pick up toys to take to kids that dont have any. We wrapped up his old toys and left them by the door. Santa picked up the toys and left a sack of coins in sonny's shoes.

So cool u have ur family volunteer

I don't celebrate Christmas, but this way sounds better than straight up lies and entitlement. Your parents worked for those gifts, let's be grateful. We can still have legends and imagination, we don't need to believe it's true for imaginary creatures to be fun!

When my kids were seven and five, the little evangelical Baptist preachers daughter from across the street who is really really sweet but also very bought into religion, told my daughter that there was no such thing as Santa and that all of our gods and goddesses weren't real but her God was real and that was a whole conversation. Lol but my kids knew for a long time that we adults and and with the kids that we are the ones that create the spirit of Santa. Santa is not a literal person but a mythos that we perpetuate by trying to create magic for each other.

Thank you I needed this

I don’t remember ever believing in Santa, although I did at a very very young age. I knew he wasn’t real by around 5-6, so my youngest brother never had a chance to because we’d already told him the truth. Our mom had a really rough time with Santa as a kid. She was 14 before her mom finally admitted to all the lies, even though she had been picked on ruthlessly by other kids about it. So when I asked if Santa was real, mom said this, “Does it matter? You’ll still get presents anyway.” And no, it didn’t matter. Christmas is still my favorite holiday. I shop like crazy and get super excited. No Santa required.

"Im looking at you, witchcraft" Me: "Hey! I didnt do NOTHING to no cows! I will steal your cats though🤣"

Beautiful