You are genuine and generous, Jerry! No loud marketing tricks that insult the intelligence. I learn a lot from your videos. Greetings from the Netherlands!
I was always a natural story teller, like my parents. I write, how I remember things. I published "Memories od Fairlawn" back in September on amazon and am working on my memoirs of seven years as a maintenance man at a luxury apartment complex.
This is crazy😩😩 first time writer even though it’s always been apart of me and I decided that I wanted to write a memoir. It has literally been coming along as you described but you’ve given me ways to clean it up tremendously. Before, I was just writing what sounded interesting and felt captivating to me but with someone else in mind… kind of like I was having a conversation in my mind. Thank you so much
There are so many authors on RU-vid it’s ridiculous. But the universe made your video appear in front of me and now I am hooked on how you present your videos. Being that I am 63 years old writing my first memoir I watched all 17.16 seconds of your video and you have my attention. Not only are you in established author but it conveys you know what you’re talking about. And I guess because you’re bald to and not shaved your head has a lot to do with it just kidding so now I’m about to watch other videos of yours to help me along my journey
I have found Jerry B. Jenkins and must say it has been an excellent learning experience. As a published author of forensic mystery/thrillers, I have an interest in writing a memoir and wanted some guidance on the most successful approaches to producing a great one. Jerry is very articulate and helpful in his guidance. Writers are always growing and honing skills. I value his literary views.
This video is really helpful, but I disagree with your last point. If your father abused you during your childhood, you can’t change it to your teacher abusing you. Your memoir becomes fiction at that point. Pseudonyms are fine if you give a disclaimer, but you can’t make big changes like that and still call it a true story. Also, sometimes you gotta throw people under the bus if they deserve it. If the events really happened and you have proof, any grievances won’t hold up in court.
I agree, the emotional response to a father's abuse is far different from that of a teacher. I know I experienced both. Actually it wasn't a teacher it was the school psychologist
It depends upon how you destroy your father and your reasoning for wanting to publish his sin against you. Here is an excerpt of my draft of my memoir and how I handled it: And why was that damn gun in their room and how did Kimmy know about it! Of course, our family dynamic repressed outbursts from early childhood. At first it was just a matter of respecting daddy, then he turned respect into control with our fear of reprisals. So, by adulthood, we were all paralyzed with the dysfunction of our family dance which translated into not uttering an accusation against daddy for having a gun in the home. He knew she was psychotic. At least he must have known. Can’t a parent notice such aberrant behaviors? Wouldn’t hospitalizations on a psych ward, and trips to the ER with a frantic screaming daughter give one a clue? So, that night seething anger and outrage were swallowed like baby aspirin. Another contributing change to the dance was there were more dancers on the floor with our two grandmothers living in the home. We couldn’t upset them. Then, there was our saintly mother. There we sat, silent, seven of us impacted by the unthinkable act of one dancer, all biting our tongues in grief, not speaking the obvious. In another chapter I revisit: Thank God above for my not lashing out at my father! What I did not know the day my sister shot herself was the depth and layered heartbreak mom and dad had on hearing the discharge of the handgun. This didn’t happen to my baby, it happened to theirs. While I could no longer eavesdrop, I learned that my parents were barely speaking to one another. Since Kim was over 18, the shrinks had no obligation to tell anyone about her mental condition. Had the two of them only communicated to my parents some vital information: (a) extremely sick, and (b) vulnerable to a catastrophic end via suicide. I found mommy’s journaled note among medical records 40 years later reflecting on their lack of information. She wrote: We did not know at that time that the Union would cover psychiatry. We could not believe she was sick like this, and this doctor never really told us about her condition. She even had him fooled. We found out after she got sick again that he told her to see another doctor. But he never called to tell us this, and she told us she did not have to go back to see him anymore. I hope the Lord grant you some revelation about the pain you feel and I pray for your healing.
Im a 15 year old trying to write about my experiences in foster care, and what i experienced when i came back home, but its hard to get advice because most people think it silly someone so young writting a memoir.
Hey Jacob, I'm a former foster kid myself. When I was your age, I had dreamt of writing a memoir of my experiences as well. I put it off until now, but I wish I hadn't. I believe in you. You've got this. With time you will get better and better.
wow. Thank you so much. Jerry, you have helped me so much, and even though I am rarely compelled to write a comment, it would be churlish not do so because I got so much out of this one short video. I'm deeply grateful to you for your precision and clarity and most of all your willingness to share your knowledge with everyone who is here. When those big emotions are crashing into the words we have to put onto the page to get the story written and out of our heads and hearts and onto the paper, it is so vitally important and so amazingly helpful to have this video with this structure and tips to hang on to. Thank you again Jerry, and I wish you well. M
“I have been putting this off for ten years, because it was personal, because dreaming backwards can carry a man through some dark rooms where the walls seem lined with razor blades.” Rick Bragg I want to thank you M Jenkins for the list of references. I just begin to read Rick Bragg and just the opening of the book hit deep and strong. I’m holding my breath. Just don’t want to cry.
@Mjukglass Vanilj morning were we g I’m hgheg high home w I’m jl e him j jim hi Kim mmmmmmm new ok mom m nwhhww him mmm he dee hill we r here a bed of Ll Lmm m l m mmm mmm mmm m
Great advice. Just when I thought I would have to write a long autobiography, I was reminded that I don't have to do that in order to keep the theme alive and portray the important information.
This is very informative. I want to start writing my own memoir and i asked God for help. He sent your video to me without me searching for writing videos. And after listening to him, I have no desire to check any other video for this has all i need to know.
I'm so happy to have found you! I appreciate the clarity in the way you talk and explain things. And wonderful tools! It's easy to follow! Thanks so much!
WOW, I just listened to this video on RU-vid. Awesome. I am 70 yrs. old and have been toying with the idea of putting pen to paper (more specifically, fingers to keyboard - digitally) and leaving my grandchildren and friends the transformation of my life over the years. Your video has given me to courage to step forward. Thank you. Your new follower.
OK Jerry, this is all very clever & comprehensive but what if, like me, you're someone who feels that whilst they have a story to tell.........they actually haven't learnt from the past, haven't been able to move on & haven't experienced some kind of redemptive, overcoming of adversity....instead they are still stuck, hate-filled & making the same mistakes as ever. If you're that person, what do you then do to make your memoir appealing & valuable?
Jerry, that was great!! Thank you very much. I’ve just recently begun writing my memoir in hopes to help others. 🙏🏼 My only slight dilemma is that though I’m 39, my life is just now making that turning point 🙌🏼 and I’ve met the love of my life. So, I can start telling my story, but with her now, it’s only just begun. 😊
Keep writing. Someone needs to hear your story. Congratulations on meeting the love of your life, it's an amazing feeling, even through the storms of life
Thank you Jerry. I learned so much in those 17 minutes - such valuable advice for me to take forward in my own memoir. Particularly around changing names AND going the extra mile not to throw people under the bus... that's food for thought.
I am grateful to have found your videos. I have almost completed my Memoirs and am glad to say I believe it's written for the reader, not me. HOWEVER, I am devastated by your advice on changing names. In my case changing years, locations, schools names, etc makes no sense to me. I take your advice on shaming and naming but in my case, most of the bullies, etc have long passed. Are you suggesting ALL names should be changed? School teachers etc. OR is this an American issue? I live in New Zealand and it is rare for anyone to sue anybody. Never the less I want to publish on Amazon worldwide. I would be grateful for a response.
Good Morning Sir, thank you so much for explaining everything in detail. all the doubts have been cleared, the difference between an autobiography and a memoir, the theme, reader oriented, no preaching, and the MOST IMPORTANT THING I WAS CONFUSED TOO MUCH WAS," THROWING PEOPLE UNDER THE BUS". THIS WAS THE POINT I WAS CONFUSED BCZ, HOW CAN I LIE IN A MEMOIR. THE TIPS THAT YOU'VE GIVEN ARE OF GREAT HELP. Thanks once again and may God bless you sir!!!! 👍👍👍👍🌻🌺🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🪳
This is so dumb and so stupid people want to write about what their father did to them that’s how they get away with it this is how everybody can get away with it do whatever you like to anybody and nobody can tell anyone you can’t say some teacher abused me it’s nothing like my father abused me the father just walks for your lip all his life and can’t even have his name shamed yeah they should have the name shamed don’t do it if you don’t want your name changed
You are amazing Mr. Jenkins! I have a novel, which is half autobiographical half fictional and this video was very useful. It’s still in the drawer though because I wrote it 12 years ago and it was before the woke era, so I feel it’s too old fashioned
Thank you as so much! The part of about throwing people under the bus is especially helpfull. That was the main thing preventing me from wrighting together
|Hello Dear Mr. Jenkins. Please may I ask you whether you recommend using a pen and paper to write a memoir, or laptop/computer/mobile word processor? Thankyou very much. x
My father never abused me, quite the contrary. Every one needs someone or something to keep them going unconditionally.A person could have all of the money in the world but it would mean nothing unless you had someone to share it with unconditionally.
The problem in our society is. That smart people think they have nothing to say. And fools talk without stopping. Lol. Thanks to the Author. It was a very educational video. As all the others.
So, a memoirs can be a total life story as long as there’s a gripping theme of overcoming and triumph? And it can go back and forth with background details and portraits of other characters?
@@jamibarnett9266 Memoir is not exactly a total life story. That would be autobiography. Unless you are famous, there isn’t an audience for that type of introspection. We don’t always get what we want. Sometimes we do. Memoir is the art of sharing that fact in an interesting manner keeping readers to turn the page to the very end. Another way of looking at is 1. I always thought 2. Now I see 3. I’ve come to realize
You are great really great thank you so much Jerry B Jenkins, you have given so much sincere and useful information you have enriched us with this generous sharing .Makes the Internet worth while.👍
Thank you for this generous and most informative video. But I didn’t get the five steps broken down step-by-step. Or else I missed it somehow. Step one, step two, etc.
Hey Jerry, you give me the impression that you really care. I appear to have a problem, I’m not the guy who says, “I’m going to show you how I got out of abject poverty, and am now a wealthy man.” What if, for the sake of the argument, I really have a good story that is relative and relevant for our times. But I’m nowhere close to my goals and aspirations?
Thank you so much Jerry, so very helpful, now I'm asking myself questions about not being sued, how to redo my original idea - really enjoy your videos - from New Zealand.
Hi Jerry, I really adore your content. Could you do a video on what kinds of books you read and which authors you love. I would love to know your thoughts on Anne Rice (if you read her) and how and when flowery prose works in novels.For me personally, I find Young Adult fiction beneath my reading level and get bored very easy, because as much as I enjoy a good story- I like to be challenged by the language too. Think David Eddings and Dean Koontz who have this very deliberate evocative prose in addition to Anne.
I do believe I have a powerful story to tell that people will want to read and learn from. I am just trying to figure out a format to use, which part of my life should be the book, and if all parts then how do i integrate it all. so many questions????
The identity politics spawning the memoir writing craze-why am I not surprised? You just know people will be cutting down trees to print some first world “trauma”: being “deadnamed”, misgendered, not being there for your dying diabetic cat…
This came right in time. Thank you for your confirmation. I think it's time to tell my story. And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death. Revelations 12:11
Hello Jerry, 😊 Would you please just write my story for me 🤣. I've been ask for so long to write my life story, been in the music world. As I was listening to the first half of this video, I started to weep, because my life as so much pain and wonderful times. I just know I have to do this, because the happy, funny, lovin' times are easy to talk and write; it's the sad, bad times that are the hardest. 😢 Please, will you write my memoir for me? 😉 ✍️ Thank you for your RU-vid video. 💕
I suggest reading How to Say Babylon by Safiya Sinclair. It’s a perfect example of what you describe as a good memoir. In fact that’s how I found this channel. I’m inspired to finally write a memoir.
So the only story possible is that a person can overcome their circumstances? What if the point is that it's the circumstances that need to change? For example, if medical debt bankrupts a family and forces a child to drop out of college, even if the child manages to finish college anyway -- by, say, dropping out for a time, working, paying off the medical debt and then returning to their education (I did this) -- it seems to me that the point is that the American system of bankrupting anybody who gets sick is wrong and bad and needs to change. Or perhaps the American system of bankrupting anybody who tries to get an education who wasn't born rich is also wrong and bad and needs to change. Noooo, in Conservative America, everything is up to the individual, because the system of charging half a million bucks for a house, half a million bucks for your health, half a million bucks for an education in a country where the median wage is fifty grand a year is perfectly fair, right? Yeah, right buddy. Go tell it to the marines!
Your advice came up on my feed near the top and I'm grateful for the advice. I've written a first draught of my memoir. I'm disturbed, though, by you saying not to throw anyone under a bus - how do you not? Thank you
I was an addict for years and also a dancer . I owe this to my kids and family .. most of all I want to do this .. get it out of me because I’m traumatised 20 years later 😢
"Don't throw people under the bus" is impossible advice for someone writing a memoir about surviving abuse, and there are so many exceptions to this advice out there that I'm baffled as to how you arrived at it. No disrespect intended, but what is one to do when it comes to writing the story of survival of a lifetime of pain at the hands of one's parents?
My problem is understanding how I can explain it all the right way and use the right words. I have trouble getting my memories onto paper in a way ppl will understand me
