nyc diaries | starting to move & talking about dating in nyc 

I’m 36yr and just started going out to listen/dance to house music till 5am. You need to do what makes you happy at any age.

the dating talk was so relatable & refreshing to hear!! thank you for sharing & you’re very much not alone :) us hyper-independent girls need a support group 🤪😂

Hi Elena, I've been watching your content for years and I'm really glad you talked about being an independent girlie but also wanting a relationship! I'm about to turn 30 and I grew up in a religious community, and when I moved abroad two years ago, I finally let myself experience different things and realised it's okay to be on my own timeline. It's taken me a long time to admit that I can be single and enjoy it, but also long for the comfort and safety of a partner. Being with/without someone doesn't automatically imply strength, it's your attitude in either situation & willingness to be open to what life offers! Sending you a hug as you move to Paris, another exciting chapter awaits

whewwww this one RESONATED!! everything you said abt being a hyper-independent girlie and not really understanding how to hold space for that independence and also be vulnerable and rely on someone romantically!! What you said about equating different relationships to buckets hit so hard because I’ve been trying to figure out why I’ve felt so lonely even with lots of other fulfilling relationships in my life :) also totally feel seen on not really experiencing the “quintessential” early 20s experiences on the same timeline as friends (or, more accurately, what i probably imagine my friend’s timeline to be?). I’ve been feeling in a bit of a rut- moved to NYC almost 2 years ago now and I feel like I’ve got a very settled routine and I can’t help but feel that the pace of the city moves so fast that I’m somehow being left behind by not doing EVERYTHING all the time. idk i’m just rambling now but if you read this thank you for listening & thank you for posting this video- it’s nice to know that i’m not alone in feeling these things 🤍

you talking about reframing your dating thoughts and understanding its okay to want a partner and still value your independence did more for me than 5 years in therapy like GIRL!! thank u!!!

Hey Len, I've watched your vlogs since your days at college and it is wonderful to experience these different seasons of life with you. I'm 29 now and got married at 21. I live in the UK, in Gloucestershire (for the last 3 years I've been in a small town). I just want to thank you for sharing your life with us. I sometimes feel unlucky that I fell in love so young because I missed out on these experiences. So thank you for sharing and showing a different perspective. Hope your move to Paris has gone well, I'm looking forward to watching the next chapter. x

Deep down we all deserve a friend like Ashley🤞🏻💕

One of your best videos. Love it especially your thoughts on „grey area“ and choosing your own timeline 💕💕

I have been in a long term, very happy relationship for years now. But I relate a lot to being fiercely independent and it has actually been hard for me to adjust to having a partner while still wanting to be independent and pursue my dreams. He is fully supportive of me and doesn’t even try to hold me back at all-the adjustment has been about letting go of the idea that I need to be single to be powerful and independent. So it was actually very comforting from the relationship side to hear someone say that it is possible to be your own person while in a relationship :)

I totally hear you on the dating scene and your talk at the end. It’s so easy to get caught up in what you “think” you should be doing or what you should have accomplished by X age. It’s all BS, do whatever you want, follow your intuition, find what makes you happy. And, take care of yourself! That’s definitely the big lesson I learned in my 20s, you are responsible for you now and that must be a priority. Sometimes that means dancing til 3 am, sometimes that means getting the extra sleep. You have to know what’s right for you. Rooting for you Elena! ❤

I still remember watching your NYC vlog during the COVID-19 pandemic, that's when I first discovered you on RU-vid and became a fan. I've loved seeing you grow as a person and loved exploring NYC through your eyes. I'm excited for this new chapter in your life. Wishing you all the best 🙏❤ Sending lots of love!

moving is such a challenge, and love seeing you document this process which I relate to so much! thanks for taking us on this journey with you xx

Love love love! Loved the perspective of a "softer side" in dating while being independent and the ending message of "life is short, you can do what you want at any age!"

Really resonated with experiencing stages at different ages than usually expected. What a great video, I really enjoyed hearing your thoughts on all of this!

I love how honest you were here talking about such important and personal topics. very inspiring💛 and have a wonderful start in europeee I'm so excitied to see what's next for you 🤗

hi i've been watching you for years and years and you never fail to inspire me!! you r the best elena

Thanks for sharing more on the relationship/dating front! Refreshing to hear!

Omg I loved all of your outfits in the video, I love your style so much!

You have such a lovely personality, Elena! I come here for relaxation. Your blogs are really cozy. I wish you well! ❤

i have been watching your videos since years and after a longg time you have posted this cutesy long vlogg with lots of talking and chatting and its so adorable and fun and it really made mee soo effin happy like i dunno kinda nostalgic in a fun wayy :) hehehee

I agree with everything you said at the end of the video! I feel like your age is just a number and you are never too old or too young to have a good time and experience new things. Just live learn and grow wiser with age! ☮️😉👍

I loved this video so much!!! Thanks for being vulnerable and discussing the grey area it resonated so much! 💖 I hope you have the best time in Paris!

I cried so much during this video 😂 ..you hit so many truths, especially loved the one about screwing the timeline you Think you should belong to. It was beautiful thank you 🩶

The topic of being a fiercly independent woman in her mid/late 20s, who has picked up her life and started afresh several times, and who is very capable on managing on her own, but at the same time figuring out that she may also want a loving relationship *really* hit home. Thank you for sharing your thoughts & experiences - it honestly makes me feel less alone, and more like we're going through this crazy journey together :) your videos feel like a sisterly hug so thank u thank u x

This was such an amazing video! I felt you shared so much and appreciate that you are enjoying your path whatever it plays out to be… I applaud you for being an adventurer and just enjoying life and celebrating it with the people who surround you and love you! 👍🙋‍♀️🙌👏

I love your new york vlogs because I love new york. The aesthetic that you bring in your videos is something that resonates with me as a person. It's sad that it's going to be your last new york vlog, I think I'm just going to re-watch your old NY vlogs and pretend to be ok 🥲

Love the vibes you have,you are right,life is too short,so enjoy our lives ❤thanks for sharing 🎉wish you have a wonderful day

Resonated so much with this one !!! Will miss your nyc content for now but excited to see your travels 😊

loved this vlog Elena

Excellent Video !! Your so down to earth!! Good luck on your move as well !!🖤✌

Ahh omg I loved this sm !! and super relate to the hyper independent girl talk ! also love how much you are embracing life and the present atm it’s so refreshing! like you say life is too short 😀🫶🏼

So excited for you and your journey!!!❤

It's better to be in control than to be trusted, but if you have to trust yourself, trust only yourself. Elena, you're on the right track. No one will come up with a better plan for your life than you. Go girl!👋🌍

Loved the being single talk- I am in the same place as you, I completely understand your points and agree so much. Thanks for sharing💗💗💗

It all makes sense Elena, you're not alone

Loved the video, not the camera.

Girl this came at the perfect time. I turned 25 in January and only a few weeks ago did something click and I finally realized that I'm hyper-independent and because of that, I feel like i've been in a more masculine energy for a good chunk of my life. Being in that masculine, intimidating energy has turned men off from talking to me I'm sure. I'm starting to be more feminine with clothes, nails, and a little makeup and I can honestly say it's been a gradual process but it feels nice to finally tap into that softer side and make myself more approachable.

Loved your reflection on singleness and love so relatable!❤

your vlogs are very interesting and inspiring.specially your admiring style and fashion.so happy to watch your diaries.

Ref mi 18: it makes completely sense! I'm doing so many things in my 30s that my bf did in his early 20s or early. And it's so cool to talk about that too❤🎉

i love how you articulated and framed the grey area of the romantic resistance that comes with being an independent girl. I feel like I can totally connect with that, i totally think its based of the influence patriarchy and sexist beliefs of the past ... as men where once told to be independent and prioritize work over emotional connections. now that we woman have entered the work environment and culture that toxic correlation has polluted us also. this is all thoughts and i hope its clear that everything i wrote could be completely nuanced and grey as you said, i definitely think being"hyper independent" should NOT be considered bad shifted into a bad thing but rather there should be an understanding that when you feel safe in someone else the space can be open for support. (it just makes me feel worried that its a back track towards breaking sexist patterns to consider ourselves hyper independent because we want love as girls )i also grew up in a very religious enviroment and think it kind of straigned and restricted facets how i behaved in romantic affairs(granted I am only 18 ahhaha) but now that I am getting older I am able to make my own ethics on those morals and expand towards what make me happy, am so grateful for you sharing this aspect of your life so vunrably and it definitely allowed for me to have more clarity, i hope paris is loving you.

YES! I 100% agree, I feel like in my early 20s I was surrounded by people who didn't like to go out, or drink or who were more just focused on staying in- which was fine for them, but it kept me from those experiences, where as now, I am in the tail end of my 20s and with distance away from that routine I am going out more and enjoying adventure and just the freedom of life. While I do wish things had been different, I am taking the joy of knowing I have the power to just enjoy and experience what I want to, and it's no less fun now, vs then.

Love the hair and dress! You look beautiful with your makeup!!

This was so relatable! The dating stuff and the house/techno was also so specifically me right now

I’m 22 right now and this was so perfectly said, I relate to almost everything 🥹

Amazing video☺️🌸 hope your date went well! Experiencing and getting to know people is great, this way you get to know yourself more, what you like and what you prefer not to deal with, so when you meet your right partner, you’ll know that is!

What a wonderful video to start off the day

Lovely, Elena! Thanks for sharing ❤Totally relate

so exciting that you’re moving to paris!! I’d love to move there too so defs gonna live vicariously thru u 🙃

I used to also not want to be dependent on anyone and I was so scared of becoming dependent on someone if I was in a serious relationship. I told myself I would never be like “those other girls” and thought if I was tied down I would lose my freedom. I thought that my friendships with others was enough dependency. I also just felt really awkward going on dates because I didn’t want to open up to people too much and wanted things to stay surface level. Until I met my current girlfriend. You don’t understand until you meet THAT person, how fulfilling a healthy relationship really can be. I didn’t lose my independence at all (we are both capable, independent women). And I truly learned what it meant to have someone be an extension of you. To have someone you can talk to about anything. Someone to lean on and someone who leans on you when they need it. I didn’t realise what it meant to work as a team on such a deeper level. To have a person outside of your family that feels like home. I can’t even put into words how challenging but freeing it is finding your other half. It’s so worth it

Went through the same thing as you, I’m 29 now and going to edclv, 8 hours of sleep for the entire festival haha I’m living my life for me, doing pushups and cartwheels in the streets. I’m so proud of myself

My god her eyes are stunning

love your thoughts!!

Hey Elena, I am 31 years old and have been single the vast majority of my life. I have never thought about the "fiercely independent concept". I am realizing now that I have been using it as a justification for being single. I am not saying that being single is a bad thing. I am (finally!) loving my single life for the first time instead of trying to convince myself I love it. But what you helped me realize is that I was pulling my persona of "fiercely independent" girl farther than comfortable for me, just because it helped me gain an impression of control over being single. I'll try to update this as "romantically independent" or "lovingly independent" for now! You were also listing the different cups to fill: relationship love, family love, friendships love. I used to think those were the main three ones and since the romantic and family love were quite low, I was pouring my time and energy in the friendships love (which got me the most amazing friends!). But this also drove me to forget who I was, because for many years I didn't consider self-love as one of these cups to fill. I was doing sports, eating well, practising self-care, but I forgot the ultimate act of self love, which was to listen to myself (it took me months to relearn to do it!). Turns out I have been thinking I was kind of an extrovert for 15 years, when I am in fact really introverted. Now the relationship and family love cups are still pretty much empty, I lowered the friendships love cup so much in comparison to a few months ago, but I am starting to feel so much better, but I realized it's because I am finally embracing who I am instead of fighting it. Sending you lots of love from Brussels (all kinds from all cups you can find hehe). Enjoy Paris and if you need someone to show you around Brussels, don't hesitate to reach out, I love to show my city around!

The dating talk was so on point! Theres so much out there about the benefits of being single, but as someone whos been single and fiercly hyper independent her whole life, ive come to realise how lonely that is 😅 you can still be a badass and want company haha

such a refreshing video! also love to see you hanging with alia

I lived in the East Village and have missed NYC since a career-defining employment opportunity took me away. Your vlog's journey past familiar buildings, streets, and parks was a welcome walk down memory lane for this native NYer.

Love this new chapter Elena, great video! Please give yourself all the permission to dance and go to live music events!

Thank you! I very much needed this video - lately, I've been thinking a lot about feeling this "emptiness" in my romantic / partner cup. And I wondered if it was because some parts of my life were not completely satisfied, like I feel the city where I live hasn't all the stuff I wanna do u know, or I miss traveling and meeting people along the way! So I guess in the end, it's totally normal if you crave some romantic love

Elena, like you say, life is short. Today we're here, and tomorrow we're gone. This makes me think about eternity a whole more. Life is fleeting. Eternity is long.

Oh I feel you girl, I'm 37 ans very avoidant. Relationships always scared the shit out of my freedom and independance.. it's good you're taking care of it now because the struggle is real and it gets worse the more you stay away from those damn relationships..

I big time relate! We are same age and I like to say im Benjamin buttoning because im doing things "backwards"- I quit my full time job to teach English and live in Spain so that I can travel and experience the world where most people our age have already done this "stint" and are starting to settle. I am also hyper independent and have always thought it has been a little detrimental as I have also been single for a long while now. Self awareness is key, and we have plenty of time to break the habitual thoughts and learn to love and be loved. Good luck!

This is unrelated, but your Paris guide helped me so much on my trip. Thank you so much!

Love everything about this vlog! So relatable for me- I'm a single, very independent 27 year old living in the Bay Area :)

Going to miss you Elena

Yes I’m 45 and the strong independent “me” is embracing a softer side that feels feminine and more balanced, than where I was in my 30s and professional development days. So grateful to hear you talk on this subject. We can leave room for the both bada$$ and the bae versions of ourselves. ❤ And your red carpet look is fire! You nailed the old Hollywood look amazingly! And yes! Let’s keep laughing and dancing (and hustling) through this beautiful thing called life. 🧚🏽

so happy to see Alice in your vlog ❤

I loveeeee the camera actually ! Which one is it?

Paris! Dang. I was always hoping to run into you in NYC. Good luck.

I loveee thisss vlogg :))))

Anytime Elena says "I hope this is reaching the right audience," it's me. I'm the right audience.

Keep the running up! it will do you good

What is the new camera called?? Love the vibes

Also curious to hear more about your perspective on Christianity. I had a bad experience with the church growing up and I became a major skeptic for 8 years. Now I’m a devout Christian and I love Jesus because I had a personal encounter with God. ❤

Dopiest vibes🌹

Love this video! Love Manhattan!

We’re the same person. Thank you for expressing yourself

Have a nice (globe) traveling then! 🍀

Lithuania! 🇱🇹 visit Nida, it’s the best in summer

Love the new camera!! What is it? ☺️

You're a good travel video maker

Lovely lady - I’m 46 and relate to your musings on independence a lot. I was always the fierce independent gal, still am (albeit older) and wonder if I’ll ever soften. I don’t really think about it too much. However there are times I miss an adventure buddy, and the softness and intimacy you have with a significant person who you really appreciate and enjoy. However, there is a joy in coming home to MY House, owning MY campervan, having a successful career and joyful vibrant life and adventuring when I want…. not being tied down. It’s a tough one! Relationships were always a bit of a struggle for me, I’m quite intuitive and prefer realness and connection, not games. I think I’m happier without but still do sometimes wonder……

Where is that brown and black jumper from it’s so cute ?!?!

I had my first kiss at 25 last year and I can definitely relate to feeling a bit behind in the whole relationship side of life. It isn’t really hyper-independence or anything. More like I never really found myself wanting intimacy with others until recently. My goal now is to build those long friendships or have an actual relationship so I can at least add to my experiences in life.

I'm married and in a long term relationship but we value our independence, solo travel, and have our own friends :) Balance is so important.

Hey Elena❤ any advice for how you gain the aidacity of just showing up, and being your full authentic self?

how did the learning french go last time you where there?

What is this new camera? love!

In 25 years with fine hair, I've finally learned that letting my hair airdry actually makes my roots greasier, faster. Using a blow dryer to dry my roots makes the wash last days longer.

I know everybody is gonna hate me for that comment now. Idgaf do so but I realy feel like being a beautiful white female with a wealthy family in america is pretty much playing the game of life in easy mode. I realy hope god had a reason when he made everything unequal for everybody in this world...

awn you and alia should totally meet before you moveeeee

Great video.🤩❤

You been busy a lot of work on this video and good luck with a new life in Paris

Do you find these dates through dating apps? If so which ones do you use?

With what kind of visa are you able to move to Paris? (Very interested as I used to be in a long-distance rs with someone in NY. I live in the Netherlands. And there were just no options for us, besides marrying. Long story short obviously).

Start subscribing & following u since ur subscriber 20k,and still following then now,really comfy,enjoy & inspiring

oh hi! So you are going to Jordan and Lithuania??? Was it Lithuania???

This fisheye lens is so cool what type of camera is it?

What camera did you use?

It's best to share your life with someone when your older