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They always want to talk down about things that say are wrong with churches but won’t talk about the good things about churches. He won’t talk about what it means to die to self.
Much like marriage isn't a requisite to ministry, neither is perfection a prerequisite to marriage. The real prerequisite to marriage is your willingness to submit, submission in reverence to Christ, and then to your spouse. Without submission, no marriage is ever going to work.
I watched the whole interview between Cam and Kirk and I never got the feeling that Kirk was saying don’t get married, he was saying it’s been weaponized. In another part he says something along the lines of how the church has focused so much on marriage that we miss Jesus and ostracize singles. He used Paul’s words more to encourage the singles than anything else.
It's not just women who get pressed. I'm a 38 year old single man and I constantly get pressed to get married and have kids. I get it from family, friends, church members, my doctor, a business Zoom call, an Uber driver in LA...everywhere! Lol so ladies don't feel like you're the only ones getting it.
I am 50 year old woman and Christian men are looking for a particular type of woman and if you are not cute or financially challenged church me don't go after you... the.
Marriage is a gift from God, not a promise! The same with having children they are a Gift from God, not a promise. God may promise someone children and He's sovereign to do so but He doesn't unilaterally promise children, He gifts them!
Sexual discipline should come long before dating or marriage. If you're single be single not one foot in each situation. No one should be pushing anyone into anything just as you don't push people to believe. Look in Gods Word and ask for wisdom exactly as it says.
Well I'm gonna be honest, I said to myself after reading the comments that most of us here are saying they're single😂 I said to myself "what a perfect place in 2024 to meet someone" but didn't wanna look or seem like a desperate women. Then I said I'm 43 in Jersey something gotta give. I'm gonna be bold in this season. So check out the singles in these comments, you're the man so it'll be received better😅 Do your thing❤
I’m a Christian single woman, and I think Kirk was 100% right, I think it’s cool that the married young lady who spoke is definitely confined to a community, she’s speaking from a place where she’s lacking experience. It’s easy to talk about it when you’ve never lived it.
Several years ago I had to shift my mindset towards my single friends, especially as we got older. I would often tease them, "Why aren't you married yet?" "When are you gonna settle down." I heard a sermon from Pastor David Jeremiah about singleness and it made me rethink my perspective. I no longer try to press my single friends or joke about their decision to be single. There's nothing wrong with it. I am married BTW 😅
35, single, introverted 😅 For me, being where men are helped in providing options, but in those options were a lot of men that weren't good for me - some dangerous. God lead me through some much needed healing, so now I have strong boundaries and vet men a lot better. Before, I was willing to settle and gave so many chances I shouldn't have (even to non Christian men). Now I'm just living life and patiently waiting on God. I thank God for His protection, love, and guidance! 💖 Kept me through it all, and He is still keeping me now 😊
I watch the whole interview with Kirk Franklin & there was alot he said that needed more substance. As believers in CHRIST we have to back upwhat we say with the Word of GOD and not opinions. Too many ppl are saying "I think that......" and not saying "GOD'S Word says". The devil's greatest weapon is deceit.
correct, this is the best statement on here, Moreover, Marriage and singleness can have it's advantages and disadvantages, Not to mention that being single can also be very dangerous for some people because if you can't contain it's better to marry then to burn, because we're human. Not to mention that the bible says take heed when you think you stand lest you fall. The problem is are you marring the right person that's for you or are you opening up your heart to fast, because once you open it up it''s very hard to close it. Keep thy heart with all diligence for out of it is the issues of life. Lest just say if God don't take us through it none of us will make it. Most of the time people don't find the right person that's for them because they don't make themselves available to meet many people. Most people only go one way to work and church and shopping and that's it. Everyone is not ready to made for marriage as well. On the other hand some don't want to marry because thy want to play around and get the cake for free. They say whey buy the cake when you can get it for free. Marriage in America is not valued like it once was back in the day just like most things because the days are evil.
My father in law was told that he needs to be married in order to continue to be a pastor and my mother in law was called home in December of last year. That same church also believes that you have to be married in order to do work in the church. My husband is a pastors son and there are a ton of things we’ve gone through but thankfully we’re still married but it was still in order to do this you have to be married. It exist 100% and it’s sad.
@@msm41009 Gym, Home playing/watching the game, work, some go to the movies alone, sporting events... Local small groups. A friend/family members gathering (wedding/reception, game night, or Godchild game). I can even break down the locations of which type of men you want and where he would be...
God can put anyone together and it works.my husband and I married 27 years. He wasnt saved until 3 years after we were together, and became the greatest man of God. Its between you and God who u are with. 🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿
So much focus on women’s singleness never the man’s. When an important discussion is why are men missing from the black church and what can be done about it?
Good question 😊. I think cause for so long church has been geared towards the emotions so when it becomes more about the Holy Spirit and logic reasoning men will come .
Men are missing from the black church because we see what the majority of black churches cater to. I dont see the importance of a man going to a blk or white church thou. I thought as long as he went to church....
More of the issue is, the church shouldn’t even be labeled “black”! It’s Gods house and there’s nothing in the word about race! The men don’t fear God! They don’t have proper spiritual fathers, leaders or examples.
Spot on w/ it being hard to pick up on a woman's signals unless they're obvious; especially if you were used to dating women in the world before coming to Christ.
21:50 If ladies want a man at the church and she knows he's single, then invite him out and tell him about the event coming up. Suggest "he should come". Single Men typically dont know or dont even care for functions like that unless we are invited.
I completely disagree with the statement that women, in general, want to be married. As a woman who is SAVED and has been married and divorced, I sincerely appreciate the opportunity to be single, celibate and very active in ministry. Now, for my brothers and sisters in Christ, who want to marry, I encourage them to marry for love and be committed. Once you marry, everything you do has to be centered around your relationships with Jesus Christ and your spouse. I stress the importance of respect and commitment. ...
@@carmelabolding1353 Agreed about relationships being centered Jesus and your spouse, with your primary focus bring your relationship with Jesus. If you don't love and submit to Jesus, you sure won't do with it your spouse.
Not trying to be funny here, I'm sincerely curious--hopefully it's not too personal of a question. Do you not feel the desire for sex? For some context, I'm asking as a woman who has never been with a man, but wants to be married, because it is better to marry than to burn.
@@Deanna974 Yes. I have a very healthy desire for physical intimacy and I chose to abstain from engaging in sex. Besides the fact that I really do love Jesus Christ, I also really do love me. My desire to honor my temple is more important than my desire for sex. When I was sexually active, I was miserably unhappy and completely dissatisfied. After I chose to become celibate, I began to see myself and men differently. The bottom line is that I have more respect for myself and I understand and respect men a lot better. ♥️
I'm 43 single, Loving the Lord, building a stronger relationship with God everyday, beautiful and pushing towards being a modest woman ,(God's version of a modest woman, that is)😊 My man is out their, and he better hurry up cuse my curly dark hair had some silver strands peaking out😂
Naomi and Ruth is a good example of how to give guidance to a woman to position herself for a man’s attention. Wise, patience and love… Naomi was a great example of this for Ruth 🤓
No one is a hundred percent saved as of yet Why? because we're saved to be saved and we're in a warfare. The people that are in the so call church are to comfortable and say I have need of nothing but houses, money, and things.
This message from all of you and Kirk seems to be very confusing. If I missed some of the context please correct me. That being said before even talking about getting into marriage. The first question that should be asked is what is marriage and what is its purpose? What is my purpose in my time of singleness because it's surely not just about enjoyment and happiness in that period of life. That's cool but I haven't heard one person say enjoy being married to the Lord first so that you can find your love, security, peace and most importantly your identity in him. That's how you truly find the right spouse because you are no longer looking for a spouse to fulfill your missing needs from your brokenness. I kind of heard it but only in pieces seemingly as only a secondary thought. That's the part Kirk should have brought up and why he's never had a solid marriage because he's still under the "old man" mindset. Dating without purpose serves no one well. You should be looking for the partner who you can become one with in Christ first. Looks and physical appearance fade over time. This is why marriages fail the foundation was never the Lord first. Until people understand that marriage is just a reflection of the oneness that the Father desires to have with each one of us individually then you'll keep saying things like I'm being forced to marry, just enjoying dating, I'm still bitter because girls didn't like me as a teen, and I need signals. All these feelings puts you at the center. Which will most likely lead to some form of fornication which opens up gates that were never meant to be open until marriage. The focus in these conversations seems to always be just physical desire but the institution of marriage is a spiritual institution first. I've been married 18 years now and I love my wife more than when I first married her not just because of her but because of my deep intimacy with the Lord first. The more I love the Lord the more I know how to love her. I can love my wife as Christ loved the church because I humble myself as a bride to Christ first. My wife obeys not because of me but because she to humbles herself and recognizes that it's God that she is truly serving. I wish I would have understood these principles as a youth. This is the true conversation that we should all being be having. Kirk Franklin is misguided and very influenced by the entertainment industry so he speaks a lot of half truths without total spiritual perspective. He doesn't want to offend or be seen in a certain light but these half truths can be dangerous. Cam Newton who has number of children and by a number of different woman; he will eat this up and feel justified by the minister's words instead recieving truth that induces a change. Relationships are complicated without the right foundation first. Just sayin.
I agree with every single word that you said!! I also saw how Cam Newton ate up what Kirk said because it validated his lifestyle. I can admit that my marriage didn't truly have Jesus centered in it because I didn't think to look at Him as my first spouse. I certainly wasn't taught it either. I'm now learning what it means to have Jesus as my spouse and it's caused me to love and submit to my husband even when it's hard. Humbling yourself will do it too. All of what you said should be talked about more. Or we'll have to go through this for years to come.
Can yall start writing in the description who is speaking in the episodes? Like the hosts IG maybe? Who is the married woman in the black speaking? I wanted to learn more about her
I just think it’s strange that no one (Kirk or the panel) references the Bible as a source for information. “Alright what has GOD said about this?” NOW let’s share our thoughts. As opposed to, let’s share what we think/how we feel.
It’s an interesting message to say to the least married demographic with the highest rate of single motherhood. Apostle Paul was called to singleness. If you can’t abstain from premarital sex it’s not likely God called you to singleness.
Kirk is 100% correct. I am a single woman. I have seen women blocked in youth ministry because they were unmarried. I was told by a married woman that she was told we couldn’t be friends because I am single. This is real. The bigger problem with this discussion is they talked about the unmarried man who doesn’t want to be married. Why is that? I will tell you what my pastor said. They are not married because their needs are getting met. Men like this should be called out and discipled. This behavior is not cute or funny.
Kirk quoted the what Paul said from the Bible. It's not good to have idols. Marriage can be an idol to some people, so can being single. It's best to allow God to lead you. Not everyone will marry. It all should be done in GODS timing.
The pressure to marry is more of a cultural thing. It's been there since ages past. 30/40 years ago and beyond, people got married at a very early age. So we can see why the older generations are pressuring the younger ones to marry.
So far, they've focused heavily on "women that desire to be married"... I hope they talk about MEN who do/don't want to be married and how they're investing their single life. Ok good, they got around to talking about men... but the men want to be pursued and approached (ONLY) they don't say ANYTHING about men proactively approaching the women... its all about the women approaching the men or giving them a sign lol...I can't believe I'm saying this but: YALL GOTTA JUST STEP UP IF YOU'RE INTERESTED TOO FELLAS.
But it's all about your heart towards God are you seeking him first above all things and staying close to him that's what keeps you away from saying of any sort drawing closer to him loving on him and wanting to please and serve him if that's the heart you got you ain't got to worry about falling into sexual sin or maybe even any sin because I know me serving God keeps me out of focusing on flesh for selfish thoughts for myself I teach my girls you can't miss nothing you never had and they are in their forties and they never had and they don't miss it
Thank you, I agree with other woman. Just enjoy your single life b4 you get married. And I’m only 44 going to be 45 and never been married. GOD will have someone for me.
It took me five. Years to heal 💪🏿 I thank God for healing me 🙏🏿 the first of my divorced I tried to commit suicide three times in one week back then in the years 2017 in a haft I almost succeeded but beg God not like this I was trembling trying to get up from the pills I took I thank God I was spared all these years being alone iwas tuff but now in 2024 I'm like God 🙏🏿 ok I guess this is it i for me i believe god could restore us but hey god i still praise his holy name
Omg yall be missing ALL the hints. And then we think you just aren't interested so we move on. 🤷🏻♀️ I'm not gonna throw myself at you LOL God, help take away the blinders. 🤣
The problem is that people are looking for marriage and finding love and keep getting hurt because they are looking at man. Who better to show you love than GOD! That love is unlike anything on this planet. Most of us are out here losing our minds over some man or woman who wouldn’t die for you but the one person who did. You are willing to replace him with someone that will lay on top of you and give you nothing but problems. Paul was right. We don’t want GOD alone, we want distractions like marriage. Because if you took your eyes off this world and let GOD be your number one. You’d never turn to a man ever again because GODs love is untouchable
But if you stay single you supposed to stay celibate I'm a firm believer if you want to be kept you can be kept God will keep you if that's what you want but if you don't of course you won't be
His ministry is questionable. I don’t like his spirit about single women not married, as if he’s a single woman. The enemy doesn’t want you married, Satan is the reason why the divorce rate is so high, people getting divorced over the simplest things.
@@NewCreationInChrist896 And what beam would that be? Don't use scripture to avoid accountability and correction when the time comes for it. Always check your own motives and your own behavior, but don't wilt when it comes to correcting your brothers and sisters in Christ.
Maybe some of those men are NOT called to marriage and with that , sex is not an issue either. Also, age plays a part in this decision. Been there. Done that for some people. They now want to enjoy singleness
They gotta be careful about the platforms they go on with these half messages. They giving folks another reason to stay away. Everything kirk saying is one sided, he only speaking on the negative parts in this clip
But the word of God says a single person can serve him better because the person that is married thinks about the things of the world that's his care and concern because he's trying to please his wife and his children but those who are single they only focus have to be pleasing God don't mean they will you got a whole lot of single people out there pleasing themselves and a whole lot of people ain't thinking about God that's single but God says if you're his you should be able to put most of your focus and heart and his plan purpose and will for your life to glorify him all the time
I don’t disagree at all, but remember that the guy that was of the world and then submitted his life to Christ still needs reprogramming, so his spirit is in a battle with not just his flesh, but also his past. Because he’s developed an appetite for certain things. And for the men, we as a whole gotta do better, because we always say we want a modest girl, church girl, pure girl, a woman for our eyes only, but pay attention to the woman that shaking it for everyone. So what is the good woman supposed to think? If even the “good men” are paying attention to her, then I need to be more like her, is what they would deduce from our behavior. So we need to stay focused and lead by example, so we aren’t sending mixed signals. Be more intentional in our walk with Christ and in the pursuit and/or relationship with our future or current wives. That’s my Ted talk. Thanks for listening.
What do you mean by enjoybyour single season? What do you mean it was for engaged and getting control of your sexuality? Sounds like yall okaying sex outside of marriage. You need to be direct about keeping the word of GOD. Sexually immoral will not inherit the Kingdom! Paul is very directly saying to stop having sex out of wedlock.
Kirk is church hurt and lives it out among the lost. The word "WEAPONIZE" is a triggering word. Singleness and marraige are both good in God and biblically.
Marriage is not going to the building and getting a license. Marriage is having sex with the person - the Bible uses the word, "knew" her, meaning he had sex with her and they became one flesh. This is the original "soul tie." The marriage ceremony is not complete unless it is consummated. This is the real conversation and then maybe people will wait. 3 know a personcarnally, of sexual intercourse, followed by accusative: man subject Genesis 4:1,17,25; Genesis 24:16; Genesis 38:26 (all J), 1 Samuel 1:19; Judges 19:25; 1 Kings 1:4; woman subject Genesis 19:8 (J), Numbers 31:17,18,35 (all P), Judges 11:39; יֹדַעַת מִשְׁכַּב זָכָר Judges 21:11; לֹא יָדְעָה אִישׁ לְמִשְׁכַּב זָכָר Judges 21:12; man subject and object (of sodomy) Genesis 19:5 (J), Judges 19:22.
If you can't commit to another human being, you couldn't possibly commit to God. Your views on that other person's "imperfections" is nothing compared to how God's may view your imperfections. Should it not commit to you by holding that same logic? People just need to be honest about why they are not in a position to commit.
Wait a minute, it sounds good, but the number one mandate was to be fruitful and multiple. The apostle said ..., "But what did God say? And we not gonna act like we don't have hormones. Is he saying single and celebate, because thats what the apostle was talking about
Kirk Franklin out of order heavy. Marriage is not for everyone the bible been said that and its not called over spiritualizing its called being religious. The Holy spirit aint never been off nor lead someone off we are called to literally live spirit lives soooooooooooo yeah. But if we leaning to our own understanding then thats the flesh logic and problem. But certain positions like deacons and Bishops the bible clarifies the martial positioning. Its sad Kirk literally speaks against the word of God. Certain aspects of ministry required marriage other aspects dont. You have to say both and teach it correctly. You cant say its not needed at all for ministry the bible sections it where its sectioned and we are supposed to teach that. Its like no one wants follow Gods word no more just smear and talk and be like what do you think about this persons own understanding apart from the bible oh I agreee smh stop the cap and ignorance pleaseeeee. Some people are made to be alone others cant control their sexual desires and need to be married the bible states. Kirk Franklin was one of those so he needs to speak correctly on the subject. The bible is full of both married and single ministries this man aint saying nothing new. He just talking about how he be battling the bullying done in black culture. Even Jonah was battling with obeying God but had to preach to a nation about obeying God and heeding a warning. Its funny how exempt many people talk but wont reference the word of God as it really took place on the subjects. Cause they want attention and to be given a pass and follow some other version of leaning like God aint still gonna send correction through others. peace
Kirk Franklin knows the bible yes. But! I could not accept his counsel his actions are contradictory to the word at times, his actions dont potray Christ. His rides the line of the false prophet. You guys be careful who you seek counsel from. God Bless
Marriage is until death do ye part too many saints of God want to discredit every word of the Bible if you are living holy if you. Want people to just be single and be fornicating Paul made it clear it is better to marry than to burn these modern new women out of pocket if they don't know Yeshua I've been divorced now for eight years now and I'm a God fearing didn't cheat none of that my wife came home one day and said I can't do this no more I was devastated but I stated noticing things the woman a powerful anointing on her life and i as well but she allowed her women friends who got divorced they influenced her and her dad we had three miscarriages while we were married she remarried and had a child shes now divorced again i remain celibate and still honoring my covenant with god she trashed me but i remain god Treasure 4 life and Im DMV in my 50s i must be unworthy god restore me God im still good 👍🏿
Hat kind of non scripture Christian speak is this😂? The SCRIPTURES are plain , do you believe them or you don’t. Your singleness is not for you to figure it out. Kirk clearly took scripture out of context. If you are a not a follower of Jesus Christ this does not apply to you. You don’t need sex, it should not control you. But if it is something you desire, of course you should get marriage. Sex was not designed outside of marriage. I have never heard anyone weaponize singleness in church. 😂