"She defeated the orange blob, and didn't need millions of mail in votes to do it" DAAAAAMN! that was a roast straight outta left field that no one saw coming lmao
The line: “The answer lies in one of them, or all of them, or none of them.” Gives off the same vibe as: “Every 60 seconds, a minute goes by in Africa.”
It truly is a marvel of modern technology that we can make deep-sea research station look exactly like a community college or high school. James Cameron is such a hack not to realize that real underwater stations would be built out of cinder blocks and drywall.
I dunno if no one in the real world ever does the hand on shoulder jump scare. I routinely jumpscare people by just approaching from behind and speaking. Like, how the hell am I suppose to announce my presence when just speaking from 5 steps away spooks you?
"The answer lies in one of them... or all of them. Or none of them." Extremely impressed at how utterly useless this line is. Upvote if you think the good guys lost WW2.
I have some questions: °Who thought that having old man discount rambo was a good idea? °How is the possum able to name him after anything else in the world rather than his real name which i don't remember too? °Why are so many shots of a shark beating the door while doing absolutely nothing relevant? °Why the goblin turned on the stove?
I’m still working on my film, Cocaine Shark and Cocaine Bear at Betty Ford’s: A Love Story. Some people at the studio are telling me the title is too long and gives away the whole story, but I’m standing firm, mostly because the title is the movie! I don’t get why they don’t get it!
I guess you felt that "why did the goblin turn on the stove?" Was a little worn out. "Why was the foot there?" That is a new instant classic. But you calling the soldier a different name each time was hilarious.
@@CordellPottsWell, thank God Possum uploaded a video then. Just imagine what your day would be like if he didn't. Your pops really set you up for a bad day, but Possum saved it!
You forgot to mention that the mechanic's Cygnus business patch on his shirt is actually just a paper sticker. I guess they couldn't be bothered to have a real patch made.
Here's a fun little detail: The microscope used to analyse pathogens is a petrographic microscope, i.e. one a geologist would use to look at rock samples. It wouldn't have enough magnifying power to let you see something as small as a living cell, let alone a virus. I assume the filmmakers are using a broken one too, because petrographic microscopes tend to be crazy expensive and found in universities. Another great review, as always! My favourite part was all the names you came up with for Knuckles/Elmo/whatever. :P
Okay, nerd. (I’m just messing with you, I don’t know how else to indicate that without these parentheses and I didn’t want you to think I was actually making fun of you for knowing that)
I find it sad that Possum left his door open and nobody came, but his house has been broken into forcefully by Bigfoot, Al E. N. Prick, the Ant guy, a historically accurate velociraptor, a ghost, three kids dressed as an irish ghost, a zombie, and the Demon.
Great work Possum! I discovered the Palonia brothers by accident years ago and marveled at their ability to produce films and somehow make money on them regardless of quality. Their saving grace seems to have been helping others get into filmmaking. I can respect that, regardless of the quality of the movies they make. At least they (and now the remaining brother) did what they liked and seem to have made a kind of living doing it, which is ok by me. I avoid their movies, as a rule, because I just can't take the level of bad. But I do wish others would approach filmmaking with as robust an attitude as this and stop depending on creating stuff that feels creatively empty even if it cost millions to produce. I don't know if I'm explaining myself right, but as bad as the movies are, I think they did a great service and the surviving brother continues doing what he wants. I can dig that. Looking forward to the next piece of garbage!
Now i remember why this movie sounds familiar......i watched about 45 minutes of it before i couldn't take anymore. Kudos to you possum! Even playing dead wouldn't help you escape this wretched filth.
Here's a really depressing thought: As bad as this movie is, even with its shoestring budget it still has better shark CGI than Jaws 3D which had an 18 million dollar budget yet they couldn't even ANIMATE the shark to move and just had a still image on the shark float to the side.
This has nothing to do with technology. They could've simply used stop-motion or practical effects as a substitute for CGI. John Carpenter's The Thing came out 1 year before Jaws 3D. To this day it's still lauded for having some of the best practical effects in movie history, achieved with just a 15 million dollar budget. Or let's go 1 step further: the first Terminator movie came out 1 year after Jaws 3D and its budget was just 6.4 million, just 1/3 of what Jaws 3D had. Even with that budget, the stop-motion used for the Terminator near the end is leagues above the piss-poor JPEG they used in Jaws 3D. Poor technology is no excuse for genuine incompetence.
@@supereldinhoabsolutely agreed, all the Jaws movies after the first one were cash grabs and their budgets seemed like some sort of money laundering scheme considering the product on screen.
I want to see Mark team up with Neil Breen, get an actual decent budget and see what cinematic masterpiece they shit out because I feel l It would be terrifying
I actually prefer the low hanging fruit videos, my dude. Keep it up, we love you :) Also, if you look at the baseplate on the mag on that rifle, it looks to be a 9mm - which would make it a Ruger PC9, not a 10-22. A pistol-caliber carbine in 9mm would actually be a plausible weapon for a coporate security to carry. A mini-14 with tactical furniture would make more sense (or even an AR15, they're everywhere... in fact I live in Commiefornia and I own 3 of them) but if they're in some kind of enclosed facility maybe they're worried about over penetration from a rifle caliber like 5.56mm/.223? Or maybe those are just the airsoft guns Palonia had access to? AND OMG that little M3 grease gun toy at the end with the pic rail on top was ADORABLE.
Something that bothers me to no extent is that they couldn’t even be bothered to turn off the lights or film at night, like the bare minimum to try to indicate to the audience that this isn’t a community college and somewhere at the bottom of the ocean where it’s devoid of sunlight. Like it wouldn’t make it good, but it be at least something
I friggin love your reviews. I know this has been said before but : I've been having a rough time (medical, and some mental health issues) lately and I appreciate these well done humorous video essays.
I gotta say, a movie with the Red Skull, Hellboy, Kool-Aid, Bob the Tomato, Stimpy, Darth Maul, Charmander, The Orange Blob, The Crimson Djinn, AND Sharks sounds better then anything Disney has made in 7 years ... Of course, it looks like the "Goblin's" junk after he cooked himself on the stove.
This movie was so fascinating that I couldn't follow it. Why were they researching the sharks? Why did civilization fall? Why did Kristy escape? Why is one thermas capable of keeping a family hydrated? Why did the goblin turn on the stove?
People oftentimes say, the more you do something, the better you get. But this producer proofed them all wrong. You can produce more than 80 movies and it still feels like a school project
To remark on the most minor of this movie's problems... Sharks are actually repelled by the smell of blood, not attracted. So blending sharks to start a feeding frenzy would actually have had the opposite effect.
Hey Possum, I owe you an apology. I stole your joke kinda. "I'm on the racoon diet, I see garbage and I eat." I got the 'inspiration' from Hi I'm a possum and I find garbage. Now people at work think I'm funny
I put my hand on the shoulder of a girl from work to get her attention, I was the manager at the time and she was ignoring what I was asking her to do. She complained and got me suspended for a week. They don't show that in films.
This doesn't even go into so bad it's good territory. How can someone put this together and still decide to release it? This is on par with the zero dollar budget films I made in junior high for class.
But that's the depressing silver lining...this had a very miniscule budget and shows it. There are other movies that are worse than this with a giant budget...
I love the evil dude wanting to steal credit for the cure. As if he wouldn't already get most, if not all, of the credit because his team found the cure lol
You made my day with your new video,review, I love your unique style and well made video’s. Tnx very much. Despite my low income I will consider becoming a patron..,
Remember everyone....never give up on your dreams, there is a way to fulfill them somehow and one day. Movies like this one exist to remind us of that. all these types of movies are terrible on a whole new level; but they're doing what they love and managing to get paid; there is hope for the rest of us!
I was listening, not watching, while cutting up a pineapple. When I heard "why was that foot there?" I had to drop everything, wash my hands, rewind, just to confirm it was about the super mario bros movie. I'm glad I did and, I'm glad it was, and this pineapple is tasty
