I'm Actually Autistic: My Adult Autism Diagnosis Journey & How It Has Impacted My Life

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Being Diagnosed with Autism and ADHD as an Adult | My AuDHD Life
When I was diagnosed as autistic at the age of 41, this was just another step in a very long, lifelong journey to understand myself. Suddenly I had both more answers and more questions, but now I could better understand why certain things were challenging for me and why I had always felt so different from everyone around me. In combination with my ADHD, this diagnosis has been both challenging and enlightening, and today I am going to share it all for the first time.
If you have a friend, family member, colleague, or loved one that has autism, ADHD, or both - I hope this can help you better understand that person. If you have ASD, ADHD, or both - you're not alone. I'm here to help people better understand me and other AuDHDers in order to help us all live and work better together in a neurodiverse world. But today, you can see where the adventure of this channel all began. Thanks for being part of my journey.
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📌 Timestamps:
00:00 - Intro
00:22 - My Early Beginnings as a Child
02:55 - Challenges of Constant Masking
04:13 - Exhaustion and My Overactive Mind
04:43 - Early (Mis)Diagnoses
05:47 - ADHD Diagnosis and Experiences with Medical Professionals
06:25 - Dark Days of the COVID Pandemic
09:32 - Debby's Initial Research & Work with Autistic Students
11:21 - Rejecting Early Suggestions of Autism
13:18 - Combination of Unpleasant Symptoms - with No Clear Medical Cause
14:48 - The Start of an Official Diagnosis
16:43 - My Initial Reaction to the Diagnosis
17:38 - Diagnosis #2 and Shedding New Light on My Medical Conditions
19:50 - Changes in My Life After Diagnosis
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⭐️ ABOUT US:
I'm Chris and alongside Debby, my brilliant partner, we've traveled, founded companies, and navigated the world as a neurodiverse duo.
Whether it's better business tips, relationship hacks, travel tales, or just a peek into our everyday life, we've got a lot to share. So if you want to join a community that's all about improving lives, you're in the right place. Give a thumbs up if you enjoy the video, drop your thoughts in the comments, and hey, maybe consider subscribing? Cheers to a better life!
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#ADHD #autism #neurodiversity #mentalhealth #autismawareness #ASD #actuallyautistic #autismsupport #audhd #adhdandautism #livingwithautism
#neurodivergent #AuDHD #autismdiagnosis #adhders #autistic #autisticlife #latediagnosedautistic #mentalhealthjourney #mentalhealthawareness #unmasked

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1 июн 2024

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Комментарии : 272

@HappyHoney41 4 месяца назад

I was apparently diagnosed as a kid (I'm 61). I was not ever told. Burned out at 58. Retired at 59. I was 60 when I figured it out. Thank you for sharing.

@mele7410 4 месяца назад

How did you discover you were diagnosed as a kid? :< That's terrible no one told you

@serenarobak3640 2 месяца назад

O M G

@zeromonster3381 Месяц назад

Our story is similar.

@user-xv1ni8dr6v Месяц назад

I'm wondering what the difference will make you know vs. you don't know you're on the Spectrum?

@novastariha8043 27 дней назад

@@user-xv1ni8dr6v I know for myself knowing WTF was root of my difficulties huge difficulty that others did not experience….at old age of 58 diagnosed well it was huge RELIEF.

@dessny9376 Месяц назад

Covid gave me the opposite experience. Finally I was able to stay home and not be expected to be social and mask for the public all the time. I could even worry less about my facial expressions because I was able to cover my face w an actual mask rather than create one from the inside. It took my suspicion of autism to the next level, seeing how much less burned out I became. I finally got verification that it’s not ADHD alone, but also Autism about 2 weeks ago, also at the age of 41!

@zeromonster3381 Месяц назад

59 YO. Recently diagnosed. An ex diagnosed me years ago, and, like you, I was militantly resistant. She was right all along. The diagnosis of ASD/ADHD explains so much and comes with a bittersweet cocktail of feelings, from anger, to sadness to depression to relief. My life would have been so much easier, or not, had I know this all along. So many misstep could have been avoided. Who knows. You are one of the few Autism content creators I trust and respect. I find you very funny and relatable. When you revealed what your second-opinion said to you about always being autistic, I cried along with you. So, thank you for being you.

@karenholmes6565 11 дней назад

There are several autistic creators worthy of respect. Autistic AF, Autism from the Inside, Autisticmatic, That Autistic Guy, all really good creators that are very respect worthy.

@karenholmes6565 11 дней назад

I am 56. I was diagnosed with ASD1 two weeks ago. I think that if screening for ASD was the first step toward helping people with mental health issues, and autoimmune problems we would find out how common autism really is. I think it is massively underdiagnosed. I do not know why we are not screening all children for this issue because many of us hide it so very well. I started masking as soon as I went to school. There have been studies on the autistic traits of people who end their existences. They give the families of such people the assessments they give for initial screening for autism. Between 40 and 50% of people who succeed in taking their life were found to have enough autistic traits to merit going through the diagnostic process. I went through several periods in my life where I would just crash and I would feel sick. I was assessed for lupus and I thought autoimmune disease answered the question about why I felt sick all of the time and then I would recover. Autoimmune diseases is really common for autistics. One in 5 women has an autoimmune disease. I am not saying all of those with autoimmune disorders are also autistic, but any woman with autoimmune disorder should be screened for autism. Any woman with an ED should be screened for autism. It would lead to better health outcomes if all the missing autistic people got diagnosed.

@rkgomes3875 2 месяца назад

You made me cry. It was like you were explaining my life to the “T”. I am so deeply grateful for your honesty, visibility and candor. I was diagnosed at 44, just two weeks ago!

@siminarae 14 дней назад

I'm so glad I found your channel! I just found out I am autistic, and your story mirrors mine in a lot of ways, right down to running a school for neurodivergent students for TEN YEARS NEVER realizing the symptoms applied to me. I used to call my neurodivergent students Jedis to remind them how special they were. It was my autistic son, the reason I founded the school in the first place, who had to actually tell me, "Mom, you can't be Obi-wan if you're not a Jedi, too." I'm 42 just getting this diagnosis and trying to figure out how to manage this information but it is so clear that it explains EVERYTHING. Thank you so much for sharing your story!

@ChrisandDebby 12 дней назад

Love the message from your son (Master Jedi) and what a cool story from you! That school sounds like such a special place - would enjoy heading more about it. And so interesting about the parallels in the stories too. When you can BE the change in education, it’s such an amazing feeling! Are you still running the school?

@siminarae 12 дней назад

@@ChrisandDebby Thank you! This, regrettably, is our last year. We have graduated over 22 students, with another 5 in class of 2024,and served over 500+ who have gone on to private universities, Division I sports programs, and some have even started performing arts careers. I’m proud of what we’ve done, but something tells me it was time for ME now, to figure out who I really am after masking for so long. Rediscovering myself has been the hardest part of this process. I also have an autoimmune disease, lupus, but there were so many symptoms no one could explain. Autism explains them. I am sad about not being able to serve more students, but I’m embracing this new chapter of my life!

@joebhlee Месяц назад

After a few marriages, careers, and several therapists (who never figured it out) I finally figured it out when I made a friend who was also autistic. Now my life makes sense. I thought I was crazy but I was just suffering from ASD and ADHD at the same time.

@user-dy2px8gt1g Месяц назад

Hi Chris, i am late to the party it i just wanted to say thank you for sharing so openly. I am 48 and was diagnosed at 38 after one of my children died. Up until then I had masked my whole life after being told in 1989 I couldn’t be autistic or adhd because I was a girl with middle class parents. Please continue to share, you have a great way of communicating, it is truly appreciated by those of us who can’t string a coherent sentence together in real life.

@lisas842 13 дней назад

I am sorry to read that your child died.

@user-dy2px8gt1g 13 дней назад

@@lisas842 thank you x all my remaining five children are asd and probably adhd, so important for us all to try and prevent our kids having the same experience of life as us. Truly grateful to all those influencers that share so openly what life is like for us who can’t. They do an amazing job

@seaglasscolor 4 месяца назад

You are generous to share your story with us. You will undoubtedly help many people to figure out if they are autistic, and if so, to embrace it. We all have gifts and talents to share.

@planetag310 Месяц назад

I'm 67 and suspect "that I'm autistic, but not sure I want to spend $5,000-$7,000 to get diagnosed here in L.A.

@solunasassoon Месяц назад

It took me a lot of research but here in Houston I finally found an autism specialist in my insurance plan. I mean I spent over 7 years trying and struggling. I just was self identified until then and moved on with my life as if I was diagnosed while never stopping looking first the diagnosis. Fact is being older is very difficult to get the diagnosis, which is why I’ve found being self identified is good enough for most communities. I finally did get my diagnosis this year, and I only kept going for the future when I may need assistance that would require the official diagnosis. If you’re working find out if there’s an employee resource group for neurodivergent people and ask them where they suggest going. In the meantime I’ve never had a single person doubt me when I just said “I’m autistic “ because as older adults it’s well known if you were not severely affected by autism and a boy as a child, you were overlooked.

@karenholmes6565 11 дней назад

I am 56 and live in California. I just received my diagnosis 2 weeks ago. I accessed a diagnosis without any out of pocket costs by contacting an organization that helps adults with developmental disorders. They scheduled and paid for my assessment. I was referred to them by the county mental health resource center. I called this center because I did not want to see another therapist without an autism diagnosis. They gave me the number of the organization that helped me access the diagnosis. I did search and I found this page for you. It is a resource page for adults with developmental disabilities and if you call one of these numbers they can shepherd you through the process. They will not think it is weird that you are asking or help. Right now there is a huge swell of older people seeking assessments. They missed us and they are trying to make up for it. I did not want to put the entire link in this comment because the comment won't post with a link so I am going to post it by breaking it up aces-la. org/ developmental-disability-resources /

@sylviestevenson2486 12 дней назад

I so appreciate your personal revelations. I'm 80, my brother turned 78 this May, and I believe he's on the autism scale (more the Asperberger's end though not with brilliance. more the neurodiversity aspect.) As an older sister, I felt estranged from my sweet brother who could not engage with me like I craved. In any event, I gave him a rough time and was dominating, mean and so sorry for my selfish behavior later on. But what did I know? We're products of the Cold War period, middle-class country kids living out of our parent's social element and family, and had no access to Kindergarten even, let alone pre-school. I was bright and very frustrated. My brother (whom I feel is autistic,) was very introverted and unsocial, but sweet-natured really. His life has not been anything extraordinary and now he's a senior with 5 yrs. into Parkinson's Disease. So on top of a lifetime of baffling non-typical behavior, we now have brain death and some new dysfunctions to deal with. fortunately, my sister has taken him into her retirement community, I believe he will thrive there and enjoy live perhaps as never before, and we don't have to worry. He's financially secure, etc., and will be taken care of with his neurodegenerative disease. I'm quite sure he will never be diagnosed and probably for now, that's that's last thing he needs, but for me, it explains a lot of his social anxieties, lack of achievement and very limited choices with his live, etc. I have to rest with all of it and try to love him as "my family", and extend myself in the best possible way to support both him and our sister for as long as he has to live. I;' at quite a distance, so it poses less of a problem. Only wish the knowledge had been there from the start so my parents could have helped me understand his "specialness" and acted more appropriately and with kindness.

@ladyriot9620 Месяц назад

My child never showed any obvious signs until age 10 when I realized something was just off, I felt she was struggling emotionally but it wasn't just sadness. Waiting on her appointment with the neuropsychologist (7 months) I did a lot of research. I have always read self-help type of books and I have a BAS in Psychology (and family/friends with various psychological disorders and such) and I suspected Aspergers. She was diagnosed with level 1 autistic and inattentive ADHD. I am obsessed with researching, reading books and searching RU-vid for people just like you that can give me as much insight as to what she may be dealing with, things you struggled the most with and what you wished people could have done to help you and be supportive so that I can do as much as I can to prevent or lessen some of her struggles. I cannot tell you how much I appreciate you opening, being vulnerable and honest about your life and the struggles you overcame as well as the guidance, tips and tricks to make things smoother that you cannot change. I am eager to watch more of your content and hopefully be able to incorporate some of your suggestions.

@Catlily5 4 месяца назад

I rejected autism in 2006. My counselor thought that I had it. I rejected having autism because as an adult woman the 5 books I read on autism didn't fit me very well. The neuropsych psychologist said I didn't have autism either. She mentioned that I could have had autism as a child but I no longer had it as an adult. She diagnosed me as having ADHD with some autistic traits. (At that time you could be diagnosed with Autism OR ADHD but not with both.) I had a lot of other psychiatric diagnoses so I forgot about autism for over 10 years. Then my case manager thought that I had autism about a year before Covid. I was not impressed but she kept nagging me and she had formerly helped do autism assessments so I listened. She suggested that I watch RU-vid videos on autism. Watching women diagnosed with autism convinced me. Then I wanted an autism diagnosis. I got diagnosed at age 47 with autism level 2. I think that being a woman and having ADHD, PTSD and bipolar disorder hid the autism from most of the mental health professionals. They were looking at me through a mental health lens. That was not completely incorrect but it hid the autism.

@ChrisandDebby 3 месяца назад

It’s interesting to read your story - thanks for sharing that! Even the evolution of ideas (had it as a child but not as an adult) have come so far since 2006. It sometimes feels frustrating that they didn’t know better back then, but I suppose this is always how new discoveries are made and new understandings in medicine and science. But it sounds like it’s helped you to understand more now with your diagnosis? For me, it’s been helpful but I’m still learning how deeply rooted all those years of masking and misunderstanding myself based on societal expectations and not knowing there was something “different” really goes. Thanks for being part of this though - I really enjoy reading your comments! It’s nice knowing I’m not alone in figuring this out as an adult too.

@Catlily5 3 месяца назад

@@ChrisandDebby Thanks! The biggest thing so far (I was diagnosed 11 months ago) is less self hatred. I was very hard on myself for not handling my problems and everyday activities better. The diagnosis explains why I am having trouble functioning. So since I am not internally berating myself nearly as much that helps me stay more stable mentally.

@SarahDale111 Месяц назад

My bipolar disorder went away when I switched to a carnivore diet 6 years ago. I'd tried all the awful meds for many many years, but nothing stabilized me like cutting out the carbs has. And once my mental and mood issues cleared up, I figured out that I'm actually autistic. I'm 48 and considering pursuing a proper diagnosis.

@bethboyd5991 Месяц назад

I have ADHD and I went on the carnivore diet after suffering through shingles. My ADHD symptoms have gotten so much less since being on a carnivore diet. My stomach issues have improved greatly! e@@SarahDale111

@christinelamb1167 Месяц назад

@@Catlily5 This has been the biggest thing for me too, after being diagnsed autistic 4 months ago, at age 60. I've struggled SO MUCH my entire life, and I was always so hard on myself because of it. I couldn't understand why I had so much difficulty with "daily life things" that everyone else seemed to to without even thinking about it. Why couldn't I just get myself together, and just stop being so sensitive?! I saw myself as a huge failure, at life, at everything. Things are still hard, but I am giving myself more grace now, and trying to find ways to accomodate myself so I can feel more comfortable in life. I now know there's nothing WRONG with me, and I don't force myself to do things because I feel I SHOULD be able to do them.

@chantae13 Месяц назад

I got diagnosed with ASD a couple months ago. I'm 45 and will be 46 in May. This has been a very rough patch in my life and I'm hoping it gets better. I always knew I was weird ever since a kid, so I started this journey on my own 2 years ago. I've had similar things happen to me. I remember having a really rough time while in kindergarten and 1st grade. I was labeled a disruptive kid. As I got older and observed other kids and watching tv, I used what I saw and mimic others around me and was able to mask pretty good. It was so good that I learned how to mask up to 4 years. Meaning that I knew my threshold was that time frame and so I knew that once that period was up, I would start to "act different" (that is what people would say). So I was in the Marine Corps. I left after my 4 year term was up. My marriage only lasted 4 years. I've left jobs after 4 years as well. I didn't know or understand back then that I was masking or even know why I was so cursed after a certain point and would start to basically meltdown and shutdown. I've been at my current job for 7 years. So I knew that i was going to have to figure something out. I was scrolling through RU-vid and just randomly in 2022, saw a video of a women with ASD and her husband has adhd and their kids are the same (I think, i don't really remember) I didn't think anything of it until she started describing symptoms and certain things that she would do. They were the same as things I do that I actually thought was normal. Long story short, it took from that moment in 2022 until now for me to get properly diagnosed. I did alot of research on my own. Took a medical test for autism as well as other things. And even after everything came back, the neurologist wasn't convince. I was also told that I could be bipolar, multiple personality, etc. I ended up going through the VA (Veterans Affairs) and started therapy. I was asked what felt like a million questions and after and hour of eternal questioning, I was giving the diagnosis of ASD, ADHD, and PTSD. I thank you for sharing your story and I'm hoping for brighter days ahead. I'm not there yet, but I hope soon.

@jenedraws 17 дней назад

As an adult, I was (mis?)diagnosed as bipolar, then diagnosed ADHD, and it wasn’t until I was in my 30s that I started learning about ASD. I recently had a neuropsych eval and they said bipolar, GAD, something neurological, and that I needed to have an ASD assessment to rule it out. My results won’t be ready for a while, but I’m afraid of hearing them… ASD makes my entire life make sense, but what if they tell me I’m not? I’ll be lost and confused again. Nothing else checks all the boxes the way ASD does. Life is so tiring, and not understanding the “why” behind my experiences/behaviors makes it so much more… Confusing. Exhausting. Unbearable. Thank you for making these videos. I have never related to anyone more. Somehow, it is comforting to know I’m not alone in my experiences.

@hellapythonic 28 дней назад

I came to my autism diagnosis from my partner, suggesting that I might be autistic. He was kind of kidding, kind of not. The pandemic pushed me over the edge, though. Suddenly I couldn’t understand people talking (because of the masks). I didn’t know that for me to understand people well I have to watch their lips move. I have incredible hearing, so it’s not that. Just for some reason if I can’t see someone’s mouth I find it harder to understand them. I watched a lot of videos where people were taking about their late diagnosis and learned that in the UK there is less stigma and more of a drive to get people diagnosed. It gave me hope, and so I mustered the courage and asked my doc if I could get evaluated. It took over a year from start to finish but my diagnosing physician said he knew I was autistic the moment he first talked to me on Zoom. I am so sorry that for you it was a traumatic experience. For me, I felt such relief. I had an answer as to why I was like I am. My partner has been an incredible help like Debby is to you. My best friend too has really stepped up and been there for me. I wish everyone had the support I do. Thank you for sharing your story and your light.

@Akribelasurfacing 16 дней назад

Thank you Chris for sharing your very challenging life story with us from your heart. You must be so grateful to Debbie for pushing and not letting up. I’m a 64 year😊 old female and I can definitely relate to experiences you had growing up as well as ‘adulting’.

@carolinedurocher8377 21 день назад

diagnosed at 47. I'm still learning, I'm 55 now, and I embrace more and more my condition. With profonde acceptance, and peace. I see myself like a real minority, in a world made by non autistic, for non autistic poeple. Your work is so usefull, because it is about autism (and neurodiversity) by an autistic person. and more, you have a such good humor (from belgium)

@22Skeptic 4 месяца назад

Thank you, Chris. I was diagnosed just over a year ago at the age of 45. I relate to so many parts of your story. I really appreciate you sharing it with the world. It helps me knowing there’s someone else that’s walked a similar path as I have. Your channel(and others like yours) make me feel less alone on this journey.

@wesshirlaw8716 4 месяца назад

I feel you mate I was also diagnosed at 45 last year, keep your chin up and make life fit you brother ❤

@edwardtaylor502 4 месяца назад

Chris and his little buddy, that was just awesome! It really helps a lot and I'm very thankful for you being so honest and very, very brave! You are a wonderful person! 🎉

@ChrisandDebby 3 месяца назад

Thanks so much for this and for being part of my journey!!

@BiddyBiddyBiddy 15 дней назад

I've had health issues for (most of my life, but in this instance) the last decade, and been unable to work a typical job for the last three years; muscle cramps and spasm, digestional tract issues, brain fog, fatigue in varying forms, that unfinished feeling when peeing just like you mentioned, among so many other things. Went to head doctors to be handed meds that made things worse. Scanned and tested for every physical thing under the sun (nerve stim tests are fun). Two years ago I looked at autism and thought, "Nope, I'm too funny, too nice, I'm really good socially, I know how to read faces, I know how to read between the lines." A few months ago I saw a comparison chart with ADHD and CPTSD, and 'some other acronymed condition' that I wasn't familiar with... I've been through a lot of trauma with the pain and disfunction, and going broke, no answers from doctors, and a bio-family breakup, so I expected to see my symptoms for mental trauma listed in the corresponding circle; but my symptoms were all in that other circle, the mystery cicrcle, and it included some of my phsycial issues with muscles tension and intenstinal problems...and I sat there and wondered, "what is ASD?" I sat there saying the same thing as before, "I know how to read faces, I am good socially..." And then a curtain in my memory opened and showed me a hundred awkward and embarrassing replays of my past, times I got in trouble in school and at work for joking at the wrong time, having people get offended at things I said that to me were just 'facts,' or not being aware that the big gruff guy walking toward me (I just joyfully complimented him on his very funny shirt) is angry and about to fight the guy I'm standing next to. I realized that I'd been self isolating for nearly twenty years. I am anxious all the time, and it has gottten worse as I've aged. Add the layer of all the intellecual pursuits, creative endevours and endless new projects that my mind and brain come up with, and the shoe actually fits better on me than Cinderella. Fantastic video, thanks fo much for sharing.

@loganskiwyse7823 6 дней назад

I did not get diagnosed till 53, nearly 60 now. I burned out so bad ended up being on disability. Always knew I was different, to the point I rarely feel like a member of the same species. I got a few people seeing the ADHD but at the time I didn't know enough to realize it applied, at the same time I was sure I had Autism but only a few people outside suspected it at all. I have zero faith in the systems or the therapists or anyone else really. I have learned far more about my diagnosis from online sources like you than anyone professionally ever gave. Most ended up traumatizing me far more than helping.

@samesultani9191 Месяц назад

Thank you, sir. You sound like my twin. At this moment, no one is believing me. My parents, my wife, my siblings.

@ChrisandDebby Месяц назад

I believe you.

@chandlersreloved8751 14 дней назад

Hello, I'm a 62 year old female. A few of your yt videos kept on popping up and I ignored them. Finally I opened one up. WOW!!! Now I understand. Yes I've got severe anxiety and panic attacks. Due to those and many many more issues I've been through alot. Including a 17 year addiction to xanax. Stopped those abruptly in a rehab 7 yeas ago. Now I'm overwhelmed with lot of issues. Your videos along with some others has made me believe I'm also autistic. I have every symptom that have been mentioned. Actually, if this is the case, I'm relieved. This would explain everything I've experienced the last 62 years. Thank you so so much for all of your content!!

@Maiju86 11 дней назад

I feel the exhaustion all the time and every day, especially now when I am a mom and I don't get much time alone. I got bullied at school and I feel like I never fit in. But don't know if I could be autistic. I only started finding out about this because I believe my children are not neuro typical...

@JustClaude13 26 дней назад

I was diagnosed with schizoid personality disorder in 1980. Last year, at 63, I looked it up to see what that was supposed to mean. It didn't sound like me. Autism sounded more like me, so last year I went to a therapist, who agreed I seemed to be autistic, but an accurate diagnosis at my age would be difficult and expensive, so we'll just go with it. So I have an official undiagnosis.

@ameliemalanina317 5 дней назад

I’m 16 and pretty sure I’m autistic. So much of what you say is like looking in a mirror especially the part about psychiatrists. It’s like they only care about quick fixes and not about what might actually be going on. Since my experience I’ve wanted to go into psychiatry (I already wanted to peruse medicine before this, a bit of a special interest) and hearing your story only wants me to peruse it more, so that the next person doesn’t have to deal with experiences like this. Thank you so much for sharing your story!

@ChrisandDebby 5 дней назад

I hope you go into psychiatry!

@Calibri57 9 дней назад

I am so sorry to hear you struggled so much. Having the responsibilities you had made your Pandemic experience horrific. But, Pandemic was a relief for me. Yes I lost my income, but I suddenly had a lot of time on my hands, and relief from having to perform in the workplace and socially. I spent the time happily diving down rabbit holes and was fortunate enough to dive down the RU-vid rabbit holes of symptoms of autism, CPTSD, and narcissistic behaviors. I came out of pandemic with a suitcase load of self acceptance and understanding and even improved physical health. I know who I am now. I am happy for you that you too know yourself better. Isn’t it a big relief to have a clearer path forward?

@toaojjc 5 дней назад

41 here. Been waiting for an assesment for over a year now, but feeling pretty sure about my selfdiagnosis now. Your story helped in that too. I also was an 80s kid that copied other kids. I've had numerous health isues that made it impossible to go to school or work some days.

@christineE9301 4 месяца назад

Thank you for telling your story. I really appreciative the upbeat way that you approach this. I am undiagnosed but have come to accept that I am likely autistic following months of my diagnosed son telling me, "mom, I think you're autistic, I don't think it skipped a generation." I don't have issues with making eye contact, but there are so many other things I struggle with that it helps me understand why I struggle with some of the things I do, and stop beating myself up over the things I struggle with.

@loner1295 29 дней назад

I feel like I’m drowning. I’m turning 47 and have been diagnosed with everything but autism. I would feel so much relief and closure with a proper diagnosis, but have spent so much time with doctors and no help that I have given up/ filled with doubt. Your Debby sounds like an angel! So glad she was there to help you through where I am now.

@katereed4764 4 месяца назад

Thank you for sharing how difficult it has been for you to accept and move forward from your diagnosis. I suspect a lot of adults who have struggled all their lives tend to feel relief, so it is valuable to learn about your experience.

@falcolf 26 дней назад

I am so envious of how quickly and easily you obtained your autism diagnosis once your wonderful wife got the ball rolling for you! ❤ I am 34, diagnosed with ADHD, depression, social anxiety and hypothyroidism but my doctor plus a psychiatrist (plus standardized medical autism tests which I have taken independantly,) have all agreed that I extremely probably have autism. Unfortunately, getting autism diagnostic testing costs $2,000+ here in Canada and being undiagnosed autistic/ADHD for most of my life, my finances are terrible. I've spent the last six months desperately pushing for this testing and while I'm currently under the care of an organization which should be able to help, I'm still having to push and beg. I'm getting so tired of this all this pleading and scraping and talking to way too many people as I beg for help. Canada seems to try extremely hard not to help people who need it and it is infuriating. I'm so grateful that you are diagnosed now. Thank you so much for sharing your channel and teaching about ASD in such a kind, compassionate way.❤

@PH-gs9hw 11 дней назад

Thank you for sharing your story! My son who’s 13 and has autism struggles with the same symptoms that you are talking about. We recognize many of the things you are describing such as the burnouts, stomach issues and so on…He is like an image of you and one of the hardest things is that you can’t tell by looking at him that he has autism so in many cases the reactions from people around us aren’t so helpful😢…Best wishes from Sweden❤

@ChrisandDebby 11 дней назад

What is your son interested in?

@PH-gs9hw 11 дней назад

@@ChrisandDebby It varies. He is smart and athletic so he has many characteristics that are strong. For many years he wanted to be a professional soccerplayer and he is very skilled in that area. But at the moment he suffers from a lot of anxiety and is very ”demand-sensitive” (and the sometimes harsh language at soccerpratice and at soccergames is to much for him) and so now he is instead watching all Godzilla-movies, even those from the beginning of dawn and he also tries to learn japanese 😊.

@ChrisandDebby 11 дней назад

Boxing was really helpful for me. I also liked sports but struggled on team sports with a yelling coach. My boxing coaches were always tough, but they never yelled.

@user-rp8io9vy4v 13 дней назад

Everyone needs a Debbie

@briellerl034 Месяц назад

Im 20 now, I got diagnosed with Autism this January at 20. The way you explained everyone seeming to think you were a problem child, or just a person that needed to be fixed is so real. I was physically and emotionally abused my entire childhood for my “manipulative and bad behavior”, think ABA all day but up 1000% and physically abusive. My pediatrician thought I was a bad kid and a hypochondriac with my stomach and body issues, teachers begged my parents to medicate or homeschool me. I failed every class until I dropped out, I tried every medication, everything. I even left home and became homeless as a young teenager to get away from the pain and abuse of it all. But it kept following me, no matter where I went, I was still a failed and weird person. I eventually got a BPD Diagnosis that I immediately knew was a bit off, then years after I finally got my Autism diagnosis. You’re story touched me and I really do think for a lot of us, if we didn’t get that self realization or diagnosis of Autism, we wouldn’t be here.

@Cheryl_Frazier 12 дней назад

So I am crying now after listening to this. I can't imagine how hard this was for you to do. Thanks for being brave and paving the way!!! In my heart I know I have ASD. I'm working on getting a 👍 or 👎 from a professional. Thanks for all you do!

@user-sm2us5oi6p 6 дней назад

Thank you very very much for your courage and strength sharing your story. I am an MD specialised in general medicine and from now on will be looking out more for people struggling with undiagnosed autism. Thank you a lot!!! 👏🏼

@hoosiergirl8727 26 дней назад

I am self diagnosed. I am old enough for the senior discount. I have different issues. I've always felt on the outside of conversations that involved more than 2 people. By the time I felt like I was able to add something, they had been done with that topic and I was 2 topics behind. If there was one absolutely inappropriate thing to say, it came out of my mouth. I can't handle air noise like fans or open car windows. My Dr diagnosed adhd explained some of that. Even with medication, I always felt there was something else. A diagnosis doesn't cure anything, but it helps to explain things all the way back to before kindergarten.

@ldmorrison 4 месяца назад

At the ripe age of 56, my journey with Autism and ADHD has completely worsened in the last decade. Getting older has made things worse.

@darbydelane4588 4 месяца назад

I hate to agree, but same here. Age 57 AuDHD.

@seaglasscolor 4 месяца назад

Hang in there. Find the things that you are good at and enjoy, and spend time on those. Remember always that you are loved and needed by the people in your life.

@ChrisandDebby 4 месяца назад

56… you’re still young!! I’m sorry to hear things have gotten worse as you’ve gotten older. We all know getting older is no picnic. I think certain things are going to get worse as your body physically gets older. But… there are plenty of things that could actually improve. I think it’s really really important to take control of your life- who you hang out with, what you do for work, how much you work, how you spend your time, what you eat, how you support yourself (adjusting expectations and being fair and realistic with yourself), how much you sleep, how and what routines you set up, etc. Audhd can really suck, but mindset is essential for improvement. What are things that you really love doing? How much time do you spend each day doing them? Who do you love being around? How much time do you spend each day with them? How much do you plan and eat healthy food? What steps will you take to improve your sleep? I’ve got lots of videos on these issues coming and I truly hope they help. I wish more autistics knew how special they were.

@ChrisandDebby 4 месяца назад

We gotta figure out ways to steer your AuDHD ship around!!

@ChrisandDebby 4 месяца назад

I agree with this 100%!

@TinyCatSpoons Месяц назад

Thank you for sharing your story 💜 Our whole generation has slipped through the cracks and it’s honestly so sad and appalling. I had a similar experience and was only diagnosed recently at 36. I hope you’re doing better now that you know. I am. Thank you for being part of the community and making content. Channels like yours are what helped me finally figure myself out and seek diagnosis. Channels like yours changed my life for the better

@Linda-ro3yp 28 дней назад

My son (13) was diagnosed with autism last year after I asked he be tested for ADHD which I thought he might have. I was surprised it was autism. After that some things started to click for me as well. Me and my son are so much alike. I get him so well. We think alike. And while filling in his test forms a lot of the questions really resonated with me. Now I would like to get myself tested but I'm really scared to. I don't have my old rapport cards from school. And I don't remember much from when I was a kid other than being bullied and feeling alone and anxious a lot.. My husband who knows me best is willing to come with me.. Even though we're getting divorced after being together for 20 years (I'm actually happier now living alone than in my relationship) I can finally be myself..

@kimberlyevans7853 9 дней назад

I think cutting out some of the more emotional moments could of possibly help a few people. But it is your life, your story; thank you immensely for sharing.

@t3hsis324 4 месяца назад

Thank you so so much for sharing your story. I'm so glad you hung in there, and that Debbie has been so supportive through it. I see a lot of parallels, so it's so important we share our stories. I was misdiagnosed bipolar, put on various meds that made it worse, had a psychiatrist who vehemently denied it could be autism .. but a case manager who saw it and called it for what it was. The thing is a really close friend with a diagnosed autistic kid told me a few years before she thought I was on the spectrum, and to just 'hold that thought'. I still have people who want to argue with me it cannot be, and my experiences cannot be real. Sadly, it seems like my story isn't the only one where we were failed by those higher up. By sharing our stories it may make it easier for others like us accept the diagnosis... And figure out what's next.

@Catlily5 4 месяца назад

My case manager is the reason I am diagnosed with autism today. I got diagnosed last year at age 47. She kept on me to get diagnosed even though I was skeptical after being told I didn't have autism, just traits of it, in 2007.

@t3hsis324 4 месяца назад

@@Catlily5 that sounds SO familiar. It was actually a call from my father, where he stated that both he and my mother thought I was autistic that was the tipping point. That next day I called to book the appointment, and then I was like to the psychologist assessing 'I have multiple people stating they think I'm autistic, and I just really need to know if that's the case...' Don't get me wrong... It wasn't because I thought it'd be wrong, but I was convinced they would of caught it when I was much younger. Nope. Apparently I'm just one of many, as well...

@Catlily5 4 месяца назад

@@t3hsis324 When I was a child only the more severe forms of autism were caught. They knew I was not normal as a child. But I didn't have language delays. Social skills caused me to be delayed going to kindergarten. But that wasn't enough of a problem for an autism diagnosis back then.

@naginiriddle7091 Месяц назад

I cried watching this. I related to way too much that I didn't expect to relate to. I am not diagnosed. About 2 years ago, I had a friend make an offhand remark about me being autistic. I thought he was just teasing/being mean. Then about 1.5 years ago, I was visiting my family and overheard my mom talking with my aunt about how she thought my little sister was autistic. I didn't think much of it. Then a year ago, I had a pretty bad anxiety attack/meltdown. My best friend helped me through it and then asked in a very serious and caring manner if I thought I could be bi-polar. Because of the manner in which he asked, I decided to look into it, and even thanked him for giving a suggestion. I researched bi-polar, but found myself only identifying with the depressive side and not the manic side. When I typed into google again, it automatically suggested "bi-polar vs autism." I found myself reading about autism and autism in females and relating a lot to what was being said. I decided to have a talk with my mom. I was scared to, but I needn't have been. The second I said "hey, remember when you were thinking my sister was autistic?" my mom took over the conversation and said, "I THINK WE ALL ARE." She proceeded to tell me about her journey in reading up on it, and that she even had a test I could take to start to get a feel for if I might have it. My mom scored as showing strong tendencies for autism, and so did my little sister. I scored a little lower than them, but it still suggested I was a good candidate for it. I had another sister who scored much much lower than all of us (which I expected she would because I knew how she would answer some of the questions), but still high enough that it said she had potential for it, too. I am here a year later, having been watching a lot of these kinds of videos and beginning to wonder if I should go for an official diagnosis. I'm struggling so much and I could really use the tools to help bring balance to my life. I'm hoping it comes sooner rather than later, but I know change will take time. Your videos are inspiring. Thank you.

@jakeyjake68 13 дней назад

I was diagnosed two years ago at 34 and I relate so much to several parts of your story. Thank you for sharing with the internet.

@allisonmcgriff6844 Месяц назад

I can totally relate to being bored with conversations and wanting to leave but knowing it's rude and I will feel stuck like i cannot physically move.. unless I figure out a valid reason to get up.. needing water/using the bathroom

@Isobel83 Месяц назад

Thank you for sharing this and letting us know we're not alone! I am self diagnosed auDHD (awaiting official diagnosis), and your channel has become my go to for learning how to actually get through life day by day. ❤

@ChrisandDebby Месяц назад

It’s one heck of a roller coaster ride, but I wouldn’t trade my autism for anything. Thanks for being here!

@joyful_tanya Месяц назад

I got some psychiatric diagnoses over the last 50 years. Dx ADHD at 53. Completely burned out at 55. Now learning more about high masking late dx people it makes sense. Especially because 100% of my children are on the spectrum. It all makes sense now. Thank you Chris & Debby.

@chrismorneau8188 23 дня назад

Fluoride, bromine and chlorine operate among the same cell receptors as iodine, which is used by the thyroid to regulate building tissues in the body and hormones and temperature and all kinds of other detrimental operations. If the body is lacking iodine, sometimes the thyroid or glands in the body will swell to try and sequester iodine from the blood, causing something called goitre eventually if it gets really bad. Just recently diagnosed autism ADHD I’ve had stomach problems. My whole life finally feeling regular after months of taking this one drop a day solution my stomach is starting to feel like it did when I was a kid. Translation it feels more like a stomach that hasn’t had a lifetime of masking, anxiety, worry, alcohol abuse etc. Im back to me. (of course I eat properly now and I don’t drink anymore. I work out , run, And I smoke weed and sometimes even be chilled the fuck out. Sometimes..) All of the above ♾️ Yes, that is all 😶‍🌫️

@nautje Месяц назад

Thank you so much for sharing your story! The pandemic got me on the track to a diagnosis as well. I got invited into this private Discord server and a started to recognise a lot of the struggles others were sharing and it turned out almost all of them were neurodivergent. That got me thinking. Fast foward to the winter and I slipped into a pretty bad depression. I spoke to my GP about my suspicions and was put on the waiting list. Eventually, about a-year-and-a-half later I was diagnosed with both ADHD and ASD at age 44. Like you, I had always felt different from others, knowing I somehow experienced the world around me differently than most, as long as I can remember. As a result, I was bullied quite badly. Also like you, at first I was really sceptical about my ASD diagnosis, but over time got more comfortable with it. I'm still learning about the combination of having both ADHD and ASD on a daily basis, what can I say: it's a journey.

@bradraughley6206 Месяц назад

I'm 48 and have realized I'm autistic in the last few years. Diagnosed with ADHD during the pandemic and treating that led down the rabbit hole that ended up here. The first 9 months were very rough, but since then I feel so much more relaxed since I'm able to realize my needs and accommodate them. I've got a much better relationship with my spouse and my kids. The freedom to say no, I can't, or not right now has been amazing. I can't get an official diagnosis because of immigration reasons, but have had it confirmed thru my psychologist and psychiatrist. It's taken a huge weight of guilt and blame off of my shoulders. Thank you for sharing your videos and story.

@A.Abercrombie-uo9ji 8 дней назад

Thanks so much for this video! I cried a little bit and it was a good cry.... it's awesome to hear that other people have been through and are probably going through the same stuff that I have and am. I don't feel like a defective person.... I'm just a normal autistic person! It's been because of content creators like yourself that I have been able to finally find my place in this world.

@Amber-247 27 дней назад

I wanted to thank you for sharing this. It must have been so hard to film, but I can’t tell you how much it meant to me. Thanks for putting yourself out there, even the vulnerable parts. You and your wife are amazing

@MrsW0f0rd Месяц назад

Got my ADHD dx at 27, and autism dx at 36. Thank you for sharing your story and creating this channel. Just found you today, and I *love* your content. ❤Late Dx Club❤

@tdc3298 7 дней назад

I'm autistic too. I can relate. Thanks for sharing.. I'm so exhausted..

@edrodgers1258 4 месяца назад

Sharing your story like this is so beautiful. I understand that it's hard to do. But it's very powerful for me to see the things we have in common, and the things we don't. It helps me very much, and I believe it has tremendous value for so many people. Thank you so much for this video.

@ChrisandDebby 3 месяца назад

Thanks so much for this, Ed! It was really really challenging but I’m glad I did it. Hope it can keep helping others better understand the challenges but also how very unique we all are! Glad you’re here on this journey too

@jamie8030 2 месяца назад

I got diagnosed with ASD this week at 33, after feeling lost and lonely my entire life. To now have a greater understanding of myself and what it means to be nuerodivergent is life changing. I had a younger Autistic brother, who had high support needs and I assumed that because I could function in society, that I couldn't possibly be autistic but now I understand that this is not the case. Rather that evidence suggests that this just made it much more likely, given the genetic research. It's amazing to watch this video to identify and relate to your experiences. Thank you!

@darrellwilliams1870 14 дней назад

Thank you for sharing. I was diagnosed in September of 2023. Still learning and readjusting.

@phillipdudas7546 6 дней назад

I am really glad I came across your video. I have been diagnosed with ADHD, anxiety and depression as well and I have been on medication for a while now. I am 47. I resonate with a lot of your symptoms and even after taking ADHD medications. I still feel like there is something missing or I’m not doing it right and I am just tired or perhaps what I experience and have thought of as panic attacks are really meltdowns instead.

@maidofcornwall 20 дней назад

Your story has me crying Chris. I truly admire you for talking about something that you obviously find difficult. I'm proud of you. For me, it was relief to be diagnosed (late). I had a pretty good idea that I was autistic when another family member was diagnosed, fifteen years before I was. She was the only person that ever made any sense to me, everyone else was from another planet. I never really looked into it much though and I should've done. Over the years I learnt that there were things that would help me out, but without that diagnosis I felt as though I couldn't ask for them. I tried asking sometimes, but was often met with ridicule or told I was being pedantic and awkward for the sake of it. I felt as though I was faking it or attention seeking when I said I thought I was autistic. Now everyone knows why I asked for some things or behaved in a way that they might not have liked. I don't use autism as an excuse, it's a reason and an explanation. I too am extremely exhausted from dealing with the world and am withdrawing from it more and more every day. Then I have to deal with the criticism and the guilt that that creates. After all, I was fine before the diagnosis (apparently!) But I'm tired, so, so tired.

@brittz7506 Месяц назад

It really does help ❤ I'm 37. Possibly misdiagnosed, at least under diagnosed.... I'm scared to seek diagnosis because of doctors not caring in the past, same as your story. I was told by a very close friend that I was on the spectrum and got VERY offended (again, same story). I did my own research and decided she was right all along.. it's been so hard to come to terms with, but I'm trying to embrace it as best as possible. Thank you for sharing your journey, it's nice to know I'm not alone.

@gwendolinehofmeyr4074 Месяц назад

Thank you so much for sharing this, honestly and authentically. I live in a country where the full spectrum of autism, and particularly autism in adults, is viewed as something that either does not exist or needs to be hidden. I have a very supportive partner and he really tries, but I don't think he is fully comfortable with it all yet and I had to (and still have to) push and advocate for myself on my diagnosis journey. There is little to no support for autistic adults, particularly high masking or high functioning autistic adults, and I often feel like I'm being told that it isn't that bad for me, other people have it much worse, and I should just suck it up. Thing is, they don't see what they don't see. I also struggle with physical symptoms like stomach issues, bladder issues, headaches, etc. Mentally, I've realised that through all the jobs that I've had, it always starts out with me being a model employee and then after a few months, they get to know me and start to shun me out of the job and because I've hit severe burnout by then, I just end up quitting. I got my diagnosis last year at 28. The people that know, the people closest to me who I feel I can trust to at least try to understand, it feels like they are beginning to feel like it's been a year now, I should be better, but I am back in burnout again. It is difficult, complex, and a constant process of evaluation, which in and of itself is exhausting. And it is true what you said, people who don't experience it themselves, don't understand. It's just really hard some days.

@juliesmith9282 Месяц назад

You wont believe how much this has helped. I recognise everything you’ve said and It’s made me want to persevere towards getting a diagnosis at age 59. I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to work out what’s been going on, but I’m so relieved to have an answer. But I just feel I need to have it made official before I can ‘come out’. It’s taken me most of my life to get the UK NHS to even listen . But I will continue . Thank you, thank you thank you so much. X❤

@patriciatavares1007 19 дней назад

You are just amazing! Thank you for being here

@shannonloughran1448 Месяц назад

Thank you for your channel and passion for helping adults learn about low support ASD. I’m not diagnosed but many aspects of what you’re describing ring very true for me… preferences, aversions, burn out, tension, you name it. Thank you and keep at it, it’s very helpful 🙏⭐️

@hattiecattie Месяц назад

My therapist thinks I have ADHD but can't formally diagnose it. I'm waiting for an appointment with my primary care provider and hoping for a referral for an actual diagnosis. After doing a lot of searching for tools and coping mechanisms for ADHD, it became fairly clear to me I am likely on the Autism Spectrum as well. Hearing other's stories helps me learn more about neurodiversity and how it impacts real actual lives vs vague medical language in the DSM.

@SatansWerewolf Месяц назад

I'm currently in the process of an autism diagnosis. I occassionally have muscle spasms (mostly in my eyelids) like a miniature, localized seizure. I now wonder if it is a part of my suspected autism after listening to this vid.

@Elizabeth-if7pw 23 дня назад

There is no way I could afford to get diagnosed I actually thought my son was autistic and suspected my mom is too. I recently realized I do have some autistic traits. I do wish I could learn to not burn myself out. That would be my ultimate goal regardless of whether I get diagnosed with anything

@chrismorneau8188 23 дня назад

Omg. Bro. So much respect. So many similarities diet etc. so many. Love the honesty. I needed that. I’m not an alien! There is others like me!!

@andi56837ykvk Месяц назад

I’m 37yo and I’ve only started looking into autism a few months ago. It started with ADHD and that definitely made a lot of sense - the videos across on my husband’s RU-vid account and he felt I’d appreciate that (talk about hint hint nudge nudge lol). But naturally ADHD and autism overlap and so the algorithm recommended autism content to me as well. Initially autism was a mixed one for me - a lot of ‘hell yes’ and ‘hell no’s. But I decided to ask my GP practice for a joint diagnosis, and while they sent me assessment documents (which I completed and returned), they sent me to see a therapist who didn’t specialise in either autism or adhd. So I’ve had to restart the process again - it’s a painfully frustrating experience so far. But what’s interesting is that I went into that therapy session believing I was an imposter and that she’d say “nah you have nothing to worrry about”. But instead she said “I can see why you’re seeking adhd diagnosis and I believe you’re right to seek an autism diagnosis as well.” She also highlighted that I have a lot of childhood trauma that I’ve not worked through. Every time things felt too much for me I’d stuff it deep down, including how my body was feeling as well. So my body’s ailments get louder and more uncomfortable over time. I didn’t realise that asthma, eczema, childhood seizures, and my headaches could all be explained thru ASD. I had speech issues, typical adhd symptoms, and struggling in social contexts (not understanding the social rules or just getting them wrong in one way or the other). Over time I feel like I’m gradually coming to terms with the possibility I could have ASD and so is my body it seems. Lately I’ve realised that I do in fact feel overwhelmed when I’m in public settings - the headache grows, I attack my nails, grind my teeth and my skin itches - all while having a smile on my face. I’d heard of the body suppressing things that the mind believed it couldn’t handle and I believe that might actually be plausible and true to me. Your content has gradually been helping me come to terms with having ASD. Thank you ☺️

@rjparker2414 Месяц назад

Have been discussing with my therapist, what a huge overlap of "symptoms" (or characteristics) there are for both autism and C-PTSD. So much of what you wrote about rings true for both. As Chris mentioned in one of his videos, and I've observed in life, a lot of autistics have been abused. Hang in there, you're not alone. 💕

@andi56837ykvk Месяц назад

I don’t believe I’ve abused so much as I was neglected. My physical and educational needs were met but the emotional needs not so much. Plus it seems like my family probably consider me to be a bit weird and querky lol. I’ve also recently discovered there’s an overlap between autism and an underactive thyroid. My bloods come out ‘normal’ every time but I need to ensure that my thyroid isn’t the reason I’m picking up autistic traits. For context I’ve had an underactive thyroid all my life.

@andi56837ykvk Месяц назад

@@rjparker2414 I don’t believe I’ve been abused so much as I was neglected. My physical and educational needs were met (from a certain point) but the emotional needs not so much. So I learnt my emotional needs weren’t important to anyone else, and emotions shouldn’t be expressed. So I learnt to shove them deep down and I didn’t acknowledge my struggles. The iconic “smile and wave”, from the penguins of Madagascar, resonates with me. I’ve also recently discovered there’s an overlap between autism and an underactive thyroid. My bloods come out ‘normal’ every time but I’ve recently read that an underactive thyroid can cause symptoms alike to autism and that many people who have autism could have an underactive thyroid. Requires more research tho, but it’s interesting enough to warrant more studying into the topic. (Autism has become my primary focus lately).

@jayjaychappo 19 дней назад

Thank you so much for taking the time and huge effort to share your story. It has helped me - a 58yr old only just starting on this journey.

@ck868ck Месяц назад

Thanks for sharing about your best buddy. I have one too. His name is Azoth and I feel better about myself now. Thank you so much for sharing. You're changing peoples ideas about themselves and that is so important. 💖💖💖💖💖

@sr2291 22 дня назад

You're lucky to have another person to help you.

@bumblefish. 4 дня назад

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Both of you. Xx

@dus10dnd 4 месяца назад

Wow. Great video, Chris! Thank you so much. I was 42 by the time I had my diagnosis, but I was fairly confident that I was autistic for a couple of years. However, my initial reaction to the notion that i might be autistic (when my wife brought it up) was fairly similar. I had nothing against autism and I had even held long-term perspectives about many of the positive aspects that it can hold for certain people. However, the stereotypes about autism were what came to mind and that wasn't me and I didn't react well. My wife didn't bring it back up, but I continued to think about it more frequently as time went on. I found resources that discussed life experiences of folks with lower support needs and aspergers syndrome and I was eventually convinced. By the time I was convinced, I think my wife was less convinced. I was really worried to seek a diagnosis for fear that I was wrong. I finally found somebody and it was an extremely quick turnaround. I took an ADOS questionnaire and then scheduled an appointment to speak with the psychiatrist... by the end of that discussion, he said it was fairly likely that I was autistic, but we would have to schedule another follow up to formalize everything. Two weeks later, I had my confirmation. The only real issue is that things just seem to be progressively more difficult. I've screwed up in unique ways recently. I have received resistance from my family doctor despite having nearly the entire alphabet of comorbidities (OCD, GAD, ADHD, PDA, cPTSD...). Heck, I was even kicked out of the autism support group that my psychiatrist invited me to because I didn't want to conform to their group think (which I have to say that the psychiatrist is abusing his position with what he is doing... and I am glad to be out of that group... I think it was counterproductive, really). However, looking back at my life, so many things make sense through the lens of autism. I always had the social issues, but I was pretty good at masking and could have some limited success. I wanted friends, but I was bad at it. When I had friends, I could really only maintain having one at a time. I was physically awkward. I liked sports, but really couldn't deal with team sports... but I thrived at things that were primarily individual in nature, like swimming and track. I also have a sterotypically autistic job and I have been doing a lot to support myself for nearly a decade. But I had problems early in my career that I chalked up to the DotCom bust... but autism seems to have been a significant factor, as well. I always had to drive all the way across town for work and I can't stand traffic. I had no control of my working environment and it gave me a ton of anxiety. I finally had other people to talk with about things that I liked, so that was a distraction to being productive. I started showing up later and later at every job due to these challenges, despite really enjoying the actual work that I did. Once I started working from home, things drastically improved which happened long before the pandemic. But, the pandemic created issues because everyone else in my household was home all day and it ruined all of my routines. And that is about the time that my wife brought things up. I'd really like to be open about some of the other issues that I had that really forced me into masking, but I don't want to call people out... even not mentioning people, it would be obvious and I just don't want to do that, even if it is deserved. Maybe one day I can find a way because I think it would be helpful for others that are struggling similarly. Also, thanks for responding in the past!

@ChrisandDebby 3 месяца назад

Thank you for sharing all of this! And for your nice comments always. I’ve been still recovering from some burnout but I read these all but wanted to come back and respond gradually to a few. I feel like your story has a lot of parallels to mine - even down to the minimal friends due to struggles keeping up. I talk about that in another video - how it takes a special kind of person (especially patient and forgiving and understanding of certain things I need and why I fall off the planet sometimes for weeks or even months between responses) and I also was the same with sports interestingly enough. I like team sports but really only stuck with mostly individual ones like swimming and cross country (similar to you). What you mentioned about work environments too - very similar to me. I think this is one of my favorite things about starting this channel is seeing how different and unique us autistics are but also where we share experiences and characteristics. I really appreciate reading this from you. Thank you for being here!

@katejutten9635 3 дня назад

Thank you so much for sharing your story- it is so brave of you. I relate to much of what you say. I am 51 and wondering about myself.. ❤

@heatherjolly9999 23 дня назад

I’m 51 and in therapy now for the first time and she just suggested that I may be autistic. I feel like so much makes sense to me now. I’m not rude or unloving, I’m doing the best I can.

@funniful 3 месяца назад

BLESS YOUR HEART! Thank you for all of your videos. My husband and I are exploring the possibility of him having autism and your videos are helping to a great extent. Thank you, thank you

@WillowTree-ux5qy 2 месяца назад

I am 4 minutes in and you are explaining my life! Thank you! (I was just diagnosed with autism a few days ago, in my late 30s) Such a good video so far...away to watch the rest👍 Edit: finished watching the video now and, I must say I really appreciate how open, honest and raw you were with this. It is so helpful to hear about your journey. I see many aspects in common with mine. Thank you again for this video.

@martabelka-szmit3703 29 дней назад

From the bottom of my heart - thank You for being You.

@yphoenix9077 26 дней назад

I love the term "low support" and "high support". "high functioning" and "low functioning" seem not quite accurate and outdated.

@tanyabee1684 Месяц назад

Thank you for doing this difficult video. I am so touched. My 18 year old son has autism and I always want to understand more how to best support and understand him as he goes through life. I gotta say though the more I learn about autism the more I can identify with many of the things I learn. Maybe that’s why he and I have such a great connection.

@randyvanheusden732 27 дней назад

I was not a difficult kid, because I was quiet, but I have to admit I did not know when I was masking and not masking. Masking seemed to be like a normal part of my life.

@Wonderish403 Месяц назад

I’m enjoying listening to your videos. I find it ironic that you have little noises during them. Surely a video on autism would be best sans unnecessary popping sounds.

@darbydelane4588 4 месяца назад

Like me, it is likely your finely tuned masking and performance talents as an ADHD person (with dramatic affect) that literally masked your ASD from docs (and likely from yourself!). Most American practitioners still can’t decode - or even believe - the dual diagnosis. Infuriating. It just isn’t that fucking hard. Thank you, Debby. This kind of perseverance and devotion from our educated loved ones seems to be the only reliable common denominator advocating for the late-in-life AuDHD folk in the United States. It just shouldn’t be this way. It is inhumane.

@Fawnadactyl 11 дней назад

I have been watching your videos lately and it’s been quite the experience. I love what you are doing and I can relate to you so much. I just got diagnosed recently (I’m 38) but waiting on the full report as well as resources. It was a hard pill to swallow but it made sense. I cried a lot. Probably for several weeks. But I just knew in my heart it was true because of what I’m going through with my daughter. When she got diagnosed 2 years ago, I started having suspicions about myself. I also have epilepsy and apparently a lot of people with epilepsy also have autism. I’m so glad you’ve made this channel because it’s given me insight and a sense of belonging somewhere even if we don’t know one another. I’ve felt pretty alone most of my life. So thank you. Also you have an amazing wife and you are so lucky to have each other. Never take that for granted. It’s hard to find good people.

@ChrisandDebby 11 дней назад

I’m really glad you found our channel and I’m so happy to hear our videos are helping. I understand what you are going through. It’s a bit of a roller coaster ride rediscovering yourself after you’ve been diagnosed. How old is your daughter?

@Fawnadactyl 11 дней назад

@@ChrisandDebby thank you for replying! And it definitely is a roller coaster. I think I’m still trying to find myself. My daughter is going to be 7 soon. She’s still figuring out the world around her and even herself. It’s definitely challenging at times but I’m glad we figured it out sooner for her because we have been able to get some help and understanding. When I was a kid that didn’t really exist.

@chrisgrain2204 Месяц назад

Thankyou for sharing with such transparency and honesty. I felt very connected. I'm glad you have the gift of teaching and are reaching us with genuine gentleness, openness and honesty. It really helps. May you be blessed back by the LORD as you are a blessing, as is your dear wife ❤

@Survivish Месяц назад

I suggest researching about Ehlers Danlos Syndrome. A lot of people with Autism have it and it's also a reason for their several health issues. Thank you so much for opening up about your diagnosis. I got a diagnosis of autism in my late 20's after discovering I had EDS. I hope this helps!

@SK-is2ux Месяц назад

hi Chris 🌸 i'm 62, and went through all the physical stuff you talked about. this video, i think, might help my husband see it, really see it. after decades of masking i know i 'don't appear' autistic, tried to get a diagnosis, but even after the tests i took my pnp says oh yeah you are definitely neurodivergent, but i still can't get an 'official' diagnosis without paying like $2,000... i don't have that.

@nicaisleain 28 дней назад

I was diagnosed at 48 and when I listened to your video I felt like I was listening to my own life story. Thank you for sharing this and helping people like me realise we're not alone in the world.

@InterDivergent 13 дней назад

This is a moving story, thank you for sharing openly.

@barbaradoye1989 Месяц назад

You and I are a lot alike. You are definitely not alone... I married a DeadHead. I love music, all music. I am very musically inclined and play several instruments. However, concerts can be difficult. I don't like to be too close to people and I don't like heights so stadiums can be hard. Conversations can be awkward no matter where I'm at. I guess the best part is that I can stim all I want in this environment... and I do! I drum on anything I can drum on! The cool old lady drumming at that concert... it's me! I never thought my stimming would be seen as "cool"! After the concert, I am exhausted. I usually need a few days of quiet to allow my body and mind to settle down. We are going to one this evening and my stomach is already in knots! It is a surprise concert that my husband has deemed a "selfless act of kindness" towards me. It must be a band I really, really like. I feel ill! It is what it is. 😂😀 Your channel is awesome! I believe you are helping many people by putting it all out there, including myself. I am an autistic mother of an autistic mother of 2 adult autistic sons. I will definitely be sharing your channel with them. Thank you for all of the time and effort you and your family have put into this. I am grateful. Take care!😀

@RS-gl9ht 21 день назад

Thank you for this video Chris and I can only imagine how hard it was for you. You are so articulate and informative about autism - very helpful for those of us with autism in the family.

@deborahkarim1139 Месяц назад

Waiting for diagnosis l am 63 it explains everything

@Katie-Lou039 Месяц назад

A million Hugs!! I'm 39... my assessment is 1st May 2024

@ChrisandDebby Месяц назад

Awesome!!! I’ve been there. You get her done!!

@dottyfulcrum 28 дней назад

Diagnosed at 41 and a half (the research, apparently, needs to track the age as one of the metrics). She actually said 49 years, 6 months and 2 weeks. The relief for me was more along the lines of, "Wow, so I *can't* actually do social things" and stopped trying. I'm 61 now. I have 1 friend---2 including spouse. All the teachers in grade and other schools only knew that I was different, but couldn't name what it was. The diagnosis didn't exist for mild autism until I was 35. My spouse thought I should get tested and I got boiling mad about it because I also thought that autism was the high support version and I certainly wasn't that. Thank you for sharing. You know that it is monologuing, right?

@TheKelleyBunch Месяц назад

I am just finding out that I have adhd and I have been wondering about ASD. The more videos I watch about this, the more I find myself relating to a lot. I have to rethink my entire life from childhood.

@waynebrown2378 4 месяца назад

Chris, listening to you talk about this is like hearing someone recount my life story, even down to itching skin, etc. Thank you for this channel. It is a blessing to me.

@ChrisandDebby 4 месяца назад

I’m really glad to hear that! Sometimes making these videos is tough for me. I’m a very private person, so I struggle at times with posting these. I tell myself daily it’s important to help people and the times when I decide not to believe myself, I read amazing comments like yours, Wayne!

@rjparker2414 Месяц назад

I agree completely. I was astounded how much I identified with Chris' story, and am grateful for his heartfelt video.💕 Although I've been seeing therapists intermittently since age 12, some good, most not, with doctors often saying my complaints/ pains were "in my head", and inferring I was the "problem" (because they couldn't figure out what was "wrong" with me) ... it wasn't until this year, at age 69, that my current excellent therapist (originally for C-PTSD) figured out, and suggested my autism. She changed my life. 👍 Researching it intensively (science is one of my "special interests"), I've finally found that I "fit", into a wonderful community of delightfully neurodivergent folks. Chris' videos explain so much (like ADHD, and alexithymia - thanks for those too!). I'm very grateful, and embrace my AuDHD now.😜