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Thank you David and Alex. “We have come this far and we discount all our achievements and successes and only cherry pick our failures.” Guys this is brilliant and so profound.
I applied for over a hundred academic positions over the past few years, desperately wanted to get a post overseas and move with my family. I have all the qualifications and experience and could not understand why I did not even get invited for an interview. Now I know - deep down I did not believe I was good enough and that they would see I am not as clever as the would want me to be. Thank you so much David and Alex for this realization. Now I know where to focus on starting my own business.
I had 2 sessions with David and I agree it really just comes down to being responsible for what you believe and why you believe it. I think the hardest part is that once you accept your lie(s) for what they are, is that you have to choose to let go of the false story you’ve been telling yourself. Who would you be without your story, it doesn’t define you, you write your own story. But you want to hold onto it, because otherwise why did it happen, you’re trying to hold onto the reason as an explanation for your hurt - but it doesn’t make sense, you create your emotions so why are you choosing to create hurt in the first place! Rather than try to control the event, you get to the point of acceptance, you can only do your best. Learn and grow. One things I’ve noticed myself is that if you can say you’re not good enough it’s almost a defence mechanism for not holding yourself accountable for your actions, it’s like a get out of jail free card. If I’m not good enough then I don’t have to improve I can just keep doing the same things over and over expecting different results. It’s kinda crazy and once you realise it you have this what the hell am I doing moment. Thank you both for doing these videos, I’ve definitely changed my perception.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience. I noticed myself and what you said and I definitely think I use leaving I'm not good enough as an excuse and to get out of jail free card to not reach for my potential. I can do what I've been doing all my life which is playing small and holding myself back because my inner child says at least if I do that that he won't be emotionally hurt as bad if I fail because it was never really what I wanted to do anyway.
So true, we get the secondary benefits of not holding ourselves accountable and explaining our hurt in a victim type way. When we are doing it to ourselves, we have the power to change what we are doing to ourselves - it is work and we have to be willing to do it, it takes honesty and courage.
I’ve listened to this video a few times and each time I get something else from it. Today it brought me to tears “I am good enuf” I’m beginning to believe this - after being put down and negative comparisons for most of my life. Then believing the lie got like 40 years 57 now! I can see some progress. Thank you
I have never heard these things before, but every sentence you speak my soul recognizes as truth. I can't explain it, but these teachings have touched me. It's almost like my soul has been thirsty for this truth. I just could not articulate it myself. I have tried positive affirmations before, but recently I realized that I didn't believe what I was saying. That realization made me stop and ask the question of why? I did not have an answer for myself. I began to search for answers which led me to your videos.
Yes , that is true for me. My parents were like that. I’m sure they learned it from their parents. I have a very hard time with this issue- I am not good enough. Thank You so much for explaining this to me in this video
I grew up with my mother criticizing me, especially in front of others and also arguing with my father constantly so, I stayed in my father side, because of that she used to mistreated me, but now I know I never should have chosen a side, but it wasn't my fault, I was only 7 years old. I understand that it must be hard be a parent, no one is perfect but, in my point of view, is not okay put your own problems in the first place that your kids needs.
Is it possible due to our consumerism economy? We need more Money, bigger house, fancier car, otherwise I don't look good even I don't need all these to be happy.
So I could receive many, many, many positive comments and hugs as an adult but until I uncover the “first domino” that caused my inner child to decide she wasn’t good enough, all those positive comments people have said to me, I will never feel goood enough. Is that correct?
Hello Dawn, Thank you for taking the time and trouble to watch and comment on our videos and work; we appreciate your interest. Don't believe everything you are told, check it for yourself. Why don't you consider joining our FREE Wu Wei Wisdom Community Facebook support group - we answer questions and offer guidance and teachings to our members here: facebook.com/groups/wuweiwisdomcommunity/. Please check out our next LIVE online event. More details here: bit.ly/GTP-Live-Dec-2023. Kind regards, David.
Thank you for this video. I have done this pretty much my whole life. 😞 I've also begun reading up on cognitive restructuring so I can set my mind free instead of having it stay in the lie I've always believed.
What do I do if people say things often to me that I'm doing things wrong or dismiss what i say as not worth listening to.This is what is making me feel not good enough now.
Actually some people do say to their physical child these things...there is still child abiuse in an emotional way. I have said horrible things in anger to my kids that i didnt mean but it came out because i was unhealed. Some parents never see the wrong in their abuse though. Part of the healing is seeinf people outside of us as equals and just like us but in different circumstances....katie byton has shown me this....
Yes emotional abuse is real, it distorts our view of ourselves and the truth and reality. This Wu Wei teaching is showing us that this is faulty programming from damaged individuals/ warped brains -,so no truth come from a warped or dysfunctional or damaged mind - so what they said to us or about us is twisted and warped and untrue! When we can get our heads around this and absorb it - we find some sanity and straighten out our damaged thinking about ourselves - if that makes sense!!
@@Tinky456 yes of course that makes sense...i realized that years ago and started on the journey to heal and better myself. I refuse to continue the cycle and i want to be the best version of myself. So i try to love myself and in turn love my kids for exactly who they are. I want to stop the generational cycle or denial and face all my fears so i can be the best parent i can possinly be.
@@kunzang5136 i have...many many times....so much actually my children say.. I forgive you mom...no need to say sorry...i work on myself every day to better myself so i dont ever agaib emotionally abuse my childre. I want to stop the sysle and be there for my kids the way i never recieved from my parents. Only when we face thr truth of ourself and take full respo soblity can we change and be the best version of ourselves for our kids. Over the years i have healed a lot but the growth never changes. I am trying to be the most concious parent....reading concious parenting for the third time..Dr. Shefali really knows her stuff...she has helped me see witjin myself the issues i need to resolve to be the best parent i can be.
What happens when your history shows that people who have authority over your career don’t agree with your thoughts??? Then there is a disconnect between your values and what you experience..
What if we feel not worthy because we dont look like the playboy or Instagram models with big round breasts and round butt and small waist with great makeup. So we feel unworthy compared to social standards of beauty that we cannot naturally achieve? And your spouse loves those standards of beauty so then we dont feel loved fully by our spouse because we look the opposite of those beautiful women.
