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You need some very serious therapy. If you’re choosing to hang on on with a narcissist it means there’s something about you that needs some serious attention
so sorry haki. May God locate you to a lovely man. There was a time I met a narcissist in Minnesota too but lasted for 50 days but I read the mood and left. I had this mindset that I had to get married to a Kalenjin, mtu wetu weeeh, kiliniramba. Guess what, a few weeks later I met my hubby at the University corridors, also American but with a South Sudan background. God restored what I almost lost. My advice is, sometimes tukiwa majuu let us also give a chance to people beyond our country or tribe. I dated with hubby for a month, he proposed and married me 4 months later and God has been great. Akaninunulia SUV and added my name to his house so that I feel a part of him and be ready to carry his kid. God directs people with honest intentions to destiny connectors. Sis, nothing is lost, you will meet your hubby soon. A man who does not want to date but to marry and settle and knows that it is the responsibility of a man to provide. Women we just help where we can.
I relate to her story. It took me 9yrs to realize i was with a narcissist. The only solution to overcome the abuse is NO CONTACT & work on urself to excel in all facets of life
This young lady is a super star. Its easy to judge a person until you face a similar situation. I've learned to be kind and patient with folk. Please dont go back to that guy, whoever he is.
I'm so sorry to hear what you went through. Although I witnessed some of the abuse, I didn't know it was that bad. You are so strong and vital for you and your daughter. So glad you can talk about it and on your way to healing ❤❤❤
Lack of wisdom.....She was dealing with grown up kenyan kid not kenyan man.... Ladies....if you are not legally married before God's eyes...both of you are fornicating! Lqdies and gentlemen,when you guys are patying,clubing,drinking....both of u r not ready to have kids or even family. God is organize and we don't drag His name when we can't go His ways...
I went through this too three times in relationships since 2003! I thank God for my life today! My Children My Life. Don't ever wanna have anything to do with men. Not that i am gay or anything! But just embraced Self-love 🥰
In my 26 years in a narcissistic relationship, my brother in law always said that i seemed to enjoy pain. That comment used to hurt so bad...i left 3 years ago and i often wonder what that sham of a marriage really was. I remember listening to Benjamin Zulu who advises that it is always best for victims to move very far away from these perpetrators. God made a way for me to move to Europe and i can finally exhale. My adult children are still in 254 but dad has discarded them and wants nothing to do with them. This is their nature and they never see their wrong. If you are in a toxic relationship, please study these personalities and dont expect them to ever change. They leave a trail of destruction and trauma to their families
Unfortunately this is very common. I've seen this happen, even in my own family. My sister was the soul provider for the 1st 23 years of marriage, her husband was healthy and had credentials but refused to work. He also used to abuse her and cheat on her. When they moved to America, he got a job but only pays a fraction of the bills. This happens to very intelligent women, women who are beautiful and perfectly capable of getting into another relationship, but they get stuck with narcissists.
I don't know if am the only one who got pissed off listening to this😮 coz i thought as the red flags continue nitaskia kitu ingine😮 wueeeeh hii ni witchcraft
They have gas lighting tongue and some use love bombing to keep the victims to themselves!Imagine being abused in USA where it doesn't take 10minutes before the police come to your rescue!
Renting an apartment for a man , buying his groceries, paying for his friends enjoyment is madness. What did he do to her? I really enjoyed the interview. She was better off never reconnecting with him but she’s accomplished a lot in spite of everything.
Yeah,wow this is extreme,,,,its informative alafu realizing that some families lack accountability among themselves is toxic,,,its giving stay vigilant while choosing a partner🏌♀🤭
She was trauma bonded hence the back-and-forth drama with baby daddy, he got a submissive provider and exploited her. Ladies do not allow a man to tell you NO twice, if his actions don't match his words, leave. Men 'talk' thorough actions. Not everybody is for you ladies!! Love yourself, put yourself first in everything you do, be your own advocate and act in your best interests Always. In the meantime, she should elevate her boundaries, standards, values and respect herself more
Once ushaonesha mwanaume you can provide for him in the name of love you'll suffer from my experience 😢wacha tu nkae as long as love is not a ticket to heaven...God's love is enough..fear men walai
Hawa narcs are just the worst... Sasa huyu mrembo, amesoma, is organised then one person derailed human akuje akuhangaishe... 🎉🎉🎉🎉 Full custody rights given
Hizo nazo ni story za jaba am here and I have never felt lonely, it all starts with your self esteem if hujipendi even in kenya utakipata. Mimi uzuri napenda pesa,I go work n come so tired,drop and sleep, repeat the routine n fly back n build my apartments and life goes on.
@bellaolum9768 she was already having esteem issues,that's what made her take so much shit,I understand her,I have been there,but my point is the loneliness people keep on referring to in America, canada or abroad,cz am there and I have never felt lonely, unless you are a person who needs other people's energy supply,hence why the vulnerability n ending up getting hurt n taken advantage of by such abusive men or women.
No man will ever convince me to keep him in any way, not even in my apartment. I will never buy a man anything, leave alone paying his bills. Girls need to know the fundamentals of love
Your Posture is also flawed....there is nothing Wrong with buying for a guy the difficulty is establishing his or her Motives....it's a Fundermental human issue... looking at her and hearing her out talking about Celeb I can tell She wanted the relationship more than Him.
I took in the same shit, supporting him, and his whole family, for 2.5 years, feels like an eternity, could not take it anymore, I took my kids and left, never looked back
Marsha is such a beautiful person in and out I’ve met her and her baby and they are soo nice . I hope she gets all the love and support she always gives people .
The hardest thing to digest is that if the guy didn't leave her they would still be together in that toxic relationship. I hope she manages to process everything in therapy.
Oh GOD the story is very similar to mine. Im six months pregnant, he has blocked me everywhere plus his family has blocked me too. After mothering the man and taking care of him for four years, now he claims the child is not his. Been financially exploited and used all my cash and even went ahead and blackmailed me into getting a loan which he spent on himself. Now was physically abused thouroughly beaten at 5 months and told that he'll kill me and go to jail, thats when i decided to leave everything behind with my pregnancy. This is a man ive trusted with my life and supported for the four years. My life is dark and dont even know how ill manage to put everything in place before baby comes. I need prayers and alot of phsychological help right now. Sorry to use a man's email to text this, its my proxy. Guys i need prayers. Toxic narcists exists. I felt like lily is sharing my story
This is your new beginning.The old is past,the new has come. You are stronger than you know. God is creating something something new in your life. Read isaiah 43:19. This too will pass
Leaving has been your first best decision and you will make it. Starting off will be hard but one day at a time. If you have family, start from there and God will do it for you
If the guy apologized after this show, and promised that he’d change…I bet you she’d take him back, then blame all men for the results. I beg, please, you don’t have to be 54 years old to be aware that an abusive relationship is not a place to be in. It seems both of these people seriously avoid accountability and they’ve paid for it dearly.
Nyinyi ni wale watu you intentionally cause emotional damage and set backs to people. When someone is hurting you tell them to move on when you know it's not the right thing to do , now you're here telling someone who has decided to move on that she will go back. You're an abuser, a narcissist for sure. Sadist .
Go mama! I remember what that man did to you in front of hundreds of women! My goodness I remember feeling so bad for you. I'm glad you are now happy and on your healing❤❤
Thank you! That’s how serious this was! That guy and family are about themselves and their image! Even with this interview, they will be so angry she exposed them! I pray for her for her peace and safety.
If hes a celebrity like she said why is she responsible for his upkeep . That is not only red flag i see red curtains i think she love his " title " celebrity
I went through such an experience. Luckily we didn't get a kid together. People never understand it, but they can see how you've changed from yourelf. They kinda blame it on you. So you avoid reality check. And the abuser shames and uses your feeling 'embarassed' card to guilt trip you. Una experience brain fog, hadi hujali vile una ji neglect. It takes a long time to relearn yourself or trust genuinely. Thanks for advocacy. Keep reaching out to many. Men go through this abuse too!
Why are so many kenya women so desparate of marriage please being single is not a sin,for the bible says better be single and serve the LORD your God alone
@@mutuasteve2179 1 Corinthians 7;32_35 or you may read the whole chapter 7 of 1Corinthians to know more about marriage.Dont be ignorant of the word of God which will judge all man🙏🙏
@@johnkinuthia498 In 1Corinthians 7: 32-35 or read the whole chapter 7 of 1Corinthians to understand the marriage plan of God for every person living in this earth will be judged by the Bible,because it is the judgment book🙏🙏🙏🙏
Love is something we can't describe..we stay longer in a relationship we don't deserve tukipima weather when we should have seen the red flags and ran to the hills. Even when someone is offering you mothing you continue giving your best and hoping they will change. Narcissists never change..they can manipulate and take away yourself esteem and make you question your sanity because you are their target. They are the angels and you are the devil and you will not win an urguement with them. Gal, you deserve better. Move on and forget the past. God will give you someone you deserve and who deserves you too. Narcissists do not deserve a second chance..carry on girl. Mungu mbele
Listen women, Rule number one of a r/p you don’t pay rent for a man, never pick up his tabs/bills. Stay single and enjoy your Money if they can’t afford their keep.
Ladies , for how long will ww shout "love yourself" and don't be an enabler of any type of abuse.Stand firm.What I learn from Lily is that she had inner fear to stand for herself.All the time she was saying, " I don't want to ....."What about the one abusing and using you?Lily you are soooo beautiful and a conquerer.You will go higher.❤❤❤❤❤❤
So proud of you for speaking up. I am sure you will save lots of girls. You are so beautiful, young glad you got out of that horrible relationship. I hope you continue to heal. You look so fierce in your Pagent pics, it's hard to detect past pain in pics. Glad you are out of it. 💞💞
@Lily, this girl is such a vibe😊. And she has a big heart I don't blame her for what she went through. Am proud of her for being strong. Your such an amazing person. Keep going 💪
You've taken me on an emotional rollercoaster of my past. These are 3 of my ex boyfriends. Narcissistic,abusive. Basically women that are kept by women and love to tear women down. In competition with women. Your baby daddy is gay my friend. That's a trait all these guys have, they are in competition with us because they can't BE US.
I’m not victim blaming, as I too have suffered narcissistic abuse. However, this young lady tolerated too much in the very beginning. There were so many obvious signs this guy was no good. Maybe it was low self esteem and insecurities at play on her side. I’m glad she’s out of the situation and learnt valuable lessons going forward. Good luck to her❤ she deserves a decent man when she’s ready
Those speculating, its not Nonini. Nonini lost his dad kitambo sana. If you read the article by Mwakilishi 2020 about Nyashinski, you will connect the dots.
This anger issue with Narcissists is a mechanism of controlling the victim. Then they trap your mind in a way you are not able to leave him. Woe unto you if you have self esteem issues atakutumia kama kifagio.
Thank you baby girl for sharing your experience, this must’ve taken a lot of courage, and in your courage other women will gain the strength to walk away from situations that don’t serve them. Shame lives in the dark ❤️
Kumbe uchawi is real,mnatoanga wapi nguvu ya kulisha wanaume, mm kitu kubwa nichawai nunulia mwanaume ni chewing gum nani vile tu nlikuwa na mbili kwa bag nikampa moja😂🚺
You neèd to start healing yourself dear.When we keep allowing abuse, it's because we have a vacuum that reflects the abuser.Sometimes we accuse the abuser, but we have control over choices, so if we keep choosing the abuser, then we are the ones to blame.
Stop victim blaming, it’s her story not ours. Some people love hard and when you are in a toxic relationship it’s hard to take the first step to leave na Ndio unaona watu wakiuliwa in those relationships. Just learn from it. If it was easy hatungekuwa tunasikia this kind of stories.
Something was wrong into her head, ladies let me tell you a secret “ if you don’t give a man your money that man will love you so much and value you”. Hope you will never do the same. Thanks for coming
God has a purpose for you. You are a therapist to so many young girls. I know your feelings and you will heal if you surround yourself with positive people and giving back to the community.
so sorry haki. May God locate you to a lovely man. There was a time I met a narcissist in Minnesota too but lasted for 50 days but I read the mood and left. I had this mindset that I had to get married to a Kalenjin, mtu wetu weeeh, kiliniramba. Guess what, a few weeks later I met my hubby at the University corridors, also American but with a South Sudan background. God restored what I almost lost. My advice is, sometimes tukiwa majuu let us also give a chance to people beyond our country or tribe. I dated with hubby for a month, he proposed and married me 4 months later and God has been great. Akaninunulia SUV and added my name to his house so that I feel a part of him and be ready to carry his kid. God directs people with honest intentions to destiny connectors. Sis, nothing is lost, you will meet your hubby soon. A man who does not want to date but to marry and settle and knows that it is the responsibility of a man to provide. Women we just help where we can.
Eeesh there is that and then some. Hii story hapana, I am literally listening from under the table juu this is embarrassing even to a bystander. Girl! You got scammed and then robbed and then…….
This lily also had issues. All the time kwa meeting kwa club, kwa party...No way, hakuna genuine relationship kama hiyo....My Genuine assessment: Both Lily and the guy were jokers
That's not grounds for domestic violence to a pregnant woman. No man or woman deserves that. Also most times a person turns toxic to adapt to a toxic environment which is sad. You'd rather leave than adapt.
