I told my wife we’re getting a divorce…she said NO! | Reddit Stories 

1st story, that sucks for both. However it isn’t fair to him. It’s not like he went into the relationship knowing she would be be asexual. Sex is not the most important part of a relationship of course, however it would be ignorant to say that it is not a large part for lots of folks. It is very important, unfortunately they are no longer sexually compatible and it would not be fair to either of them to remain in this relationship. Edit: just got to the update: that is totally not fair to hide that from her partner. She needs to find someone who is asexual or okay not having the sexual aspect. For her to feel abused? That’s horrid, and to find out you made your partner feel that way??? My god that would be awful.

I'm not a fan of all the side comments that were being said about him valuing seggs over the relationship... let's not forget she lied to him for years, tricked him into marrying someone that she really isn't, and he isn't being disrespectful at all. Most Normal relationships involve it. It's not revolved around it but it is a very physical connection that enhances emotions and their bond. He wanted to let her go to find someone who better fits each of their needs and lifestyles. Trying to force her husband into essentially cheating to compensate for the lack of seggs when he seems to be a very faithful man is only going to drive a bigger wedge. Feelings will be hurt and it will become toxic not to mention he has zero interest in that situation. A marriage is a legal contract, by being deceitful during the negotiation and merger of two lives into one, it should void the terms of the contract like any other.

I don’t see the husband as making a quick decision.. not at all … he said this has been happening for 1.5 years and he tried counseling among other things..

She can't be accepted for who she is if she lies to her partner.

Ngl, L take on the first story. I think y’all were so focused on validating asexuality that you pushed down sexuality whilst doing it. All sexualities are valid. The wife is valid for not wanting to have sex and the husband is valid for wanting it. Just like with any relationship it’s valid to split due to differing interests/values, this is the same thing. I understand it’s sad that the wife hasn’t been able to find someone who loves all parts of her but that isn’t an excuse to lie for the entire relationship. If the base of the relationship was built out of lies, how strong was it in the first place?

It's not fair to the guy to expect him never to have sex again. I disagree with Sophia

She married him under false pretenses. Being ace doesn't give you a pass to lie to and manipulate others.

19:26 this still feels like blaming OP? Like, we have to accept the wife being ace, but can’t accept OP for being sexual?

Here's my thing about sex. Sex is very important in a marriage, but it isnt the only thing. The best way to describe it is that I don't buy a house for the shower, but I am not buying a house without one. Edit: punctuation

Sophia's prudishness is getting in the way of understanding that wanting/ needing sex is as valid as not wanting it (no hate Sophia, I think you're amazing). Plus the wife was being extremely deceptive and toxic the whole time. Imagine how the husband must've felt hearing that he made his wife feel like she was being r-worded (you guys didn't even address this). Asexuality is totally valid, and this woman is totally the AH.

9:28 how does Riley hear that, hear the way she feels, and still blame OP?! She kinda forced OP to be an assaulter cuz she felt used and OP had no clue.

One thing i really like about this community over Smosh or Reddit on Wiki is that you all call them out and don't just side with them regardless of what they say. The number of people calling them out for the 1st story is refreshing. You all are awesome

1st story: Sophia and Riley are completely wrong about this one. When OP thought his wife was trying to trick him with her friend - if he slept with the friend, they could accuse him of cheating. That's exactly where his mind went, and it makes a lot of sense. The wife lied to OP. Her whole family lied to him. He went into the marriage with the expectation that he and his wife were compatible in all ways. They aren't. Again, the wife lied to OP for over 4 years. Having sex is an integral part of most relationships and OP's wife isn't interested in him sexually. It's unfair to expect OP to give up what is a very important part of a relationship. The wife needs to find a partner who is asexual as well, or she needs to be completely honest at the beginning of a relationship. Sophia said that you can't change who you are but they expect OP to change who he is and give up sex for the rest of his life.

I’m someone who is demisexual and didn’t find out until later in my relationship. I initially thought I was asexual. Y’alls comments about the story are really problematic. I was always upfront with my boyfriend about being asexual early on and then when I realized I was demisexual. I never lied like the wife did. How is the husband supposed to accept a part of his wife he never knew about till way later? Nothing he’s doing or feeling is wrong. She lied and he probably doesn’t know how to feel about her since she lied about a huge part of a relationship. Asexuality can work in a relationship but only when there is honesty about it and the partner has the right to choose that. The biggest things that influence separations/ divorces/ breakups are sex, money, and kids. It’s more important than you think and it’s not wrong to feel it is important.

Wtf was that reaction to the 1st story ??

1st story: husband isn't wrong. Not fair on him, he isn't asexual.. she needs to be with another asexual person.. she literally woke up one day and changed the whole game up.. not the AH.. Edit: The wife is definitely wrong.. Not declosing her whole story..

12:02 the _friend_ is the one you don’t like? Not the lying wife?!

1st story: he literally said they were trying thing and working on it. I feel like y'all bypassed that. She is fucked up for not telling him in the beginning.

Yeah, I don't feel bad for the wife. She knew and entered into a marriage lying. I don't think her needs or preference should be put over her partners. A marriage without sex is a bestie and roommate, not a wife and husband. If she was honest from the beginning or figured it out during the relationship, she wouldn't be the Ahole. She's the Ahole. Why should what she needs in a relationship be more important than her partners. They both need to find partners that have the same needs as them.

As someone who is ace you NEED to communicate it beforehand in the beginning if they aren't good with it then you arent deep into the relationship and heart broken and why would you want to be with someone who won't accept you for you

First story it's almost like Sophie is blaming the guy for not knowing That his partner was a sexual He did not go into the relationship knowing she was asexual.So it's not his fault for ending the relationship It would be his fault if he knew she was a sexual before starting The relationship

Y’all responses remind me you’re still pretty young and that’s coming from someone in their late twenties. Either you guys are responding with what you think the majority of your audience wants to hear or you’re literally naive (in the nicest of definitions) when it comes to these matters. Sex is very important in a marriage and this is coming from someone who’s demisexual & celibate til marriage.For her to not know and thus not disclose it is one thing. But once it’s understood she’s ACE and has absolutely no interest in sexual intimacy that does change things for her partner. As well, he explained they tried a bunch of stuff such as spending time together, being more adventurous, and I believe they tried counseling. This isn’t a hasty decision. And even with newfound knowledge if he recognizes he can’t operate in a sexless marriage he should leave rather than waste time trying to be something he isn’t or the inverse for her. The lack of empathy for the husband is astounding. Like imagine your partner for life saying sex with you feels like SA ? Your side comments are concerning and a bit harsh, honestly. I understand you have a majority woman identifying audience but these takes yall have sometimes when it comes to the men …. Be hit or miss.

Did I listened wrong? You read that they went for therapy ,tried being adventurous ect talked a lot and enjoyed being together. Sex between married partners is really stress releasing at least for me . Having sex is part of intamacy

She was being dishonest if she knew that she was ACE before marrying him which is sounds like she did know that

Bruh the trashing on the guy in the first story isnt the vibe. I love you guys but thats kinda super judgemental on your part for that. Someone shouldn't stay in a marriage if their needs arent being met and making it seem like he should simply stay in the marriage and be unhappy for her to be happy is crappy. I just feel there's less judgement when it's Sam and John. And Riley doesn't seem to have his own opinion with Sophia which is disappointing.

First story she is so in the wrong for lying to him and setting expectations that not only hurt her, girly did not deserve to torture herself for someone else's happiness she deserves, and he got strung along and she ended up hurting them both. Communication is the ultimate in relationships teamwork makes the dream work.

First couple: the wife started the marriage with deceptive intent while expecting her misled husband to deny a part of him and his correct assumption of expectation that snu snu be part of the marriage. His needs were default denied, ignored and disrespected. She viewed her husband to be as not important/irrelevant pre-union. And divorce chant is not tabled enough for the male in diminished/ compromised positions.

First story was a bit hard to get through. I do agree with you guys for the most part but that response completely missed the point of the issue. This isn't about sex as much as its about incompatibility. She pretended to be someone that she's not... he thought they were compatible because of those lies. Once she confessed it was obvious they were not a good match and he wouldn't have chosen to marry this person if he knew who she really was. She basically tricked him into marriage. Is that situation sad..of course. But ultimately the only right move there was divorce. He did try therapy and all this other stuff and the entire time she knew none of that was going to work. Ontop of it all, she compared having sex with him to being SA'd. My heart literally broke for him. Tricking people into relationships/marriages is never okay. You're basically taking away that persons right to choose, I've been lied to in this way and I've yet to recover. Been single a decade because now I just can't trust people. What she did was wrong, and the only AH in this story was her. For someone to accept you for who you are, they would need to know who you actually are...if you lie about that they aren't choosing you. Their choosing a fake person who does not exist. Don't see how you can work that out.

In 1st story wife is 100% the ah. She lied to op about her sexuality that is wrong and relationship ender. She just wanted partner so she kept her sexuality secret and when she trapped op in marriage she told him the truth. Relationship based on lie rarely work out.AND OP IS NOT AH IN ANYWAY PERIOD.

I understand that sex isn't The most important thing in a relationship that's definitely not the case but it's a critical part of most relationships, and i don't think it's fair to blame/Shame him for leaving because that relationship it's not healthy for either of them especially him, if she knew that she was Asexual shouldn't have continued the relationship in the first place

You can't "fix" asexuality, but often people think they're asexual when in reality they've unresolved trauma. It's good idea to see a qualified specialist first to identify what it actually is.

I don’t like the way Sophia and Riley demonized the husband in the asexual story. He was there and made efforts and tried, and y’all made it out like all he was in was sex. He was speaking about his emotional language and the thing that makes him feel connected with his wife.. just like she can’t help her feelings, he can’t help his. And together she’s gonna have a life if feeling like she’s wrong and bad because she can’t give him what he wants, and what kind of life is that? They both deserve someone who can speak their language, and he tried everything. She kept a hide part of her life from him… the person she was supposed to love, and it was expected and demanded that he just get over hearing that his wife wasn’t sexually attracted to Him… and not just him.. no one. Hearing that she only did it cause He wanted it. That’s a HORRIBLE feeling, and if you felt it you know, but I hope Jo one has to feel that.

The reason why he wants a divorce isn't because he doesn't love her it's because he wanted this in a relationship and she doesn't

My issue she was lying the whole marriage about being asexual. Even lied about why her last relationship broke off. Now without even bringing it up had her friend be naked on their bed. To op she just see him as person who can have sex wirh anyone or he will have an affair. Which can miss with the prenup

The story about the wife cheating with the kid's coach sounded so familiar up until the beach house part. I was sitting here going... "Ray? This you?" haha... Sounds sooooo much like one of my cousin's experience.

I'm a sex repulsed asexual. Of course what the wife did isn't right, but it's common. She was in deep denial and probably truly believed she could bear sex if she just loved her husband enough. Sometimes you need to have a dream partner to accept it will never work. Like meeting your dream man to admit you're just a lesbian. I feel so bad for him. And her. He's right thhat divorce is the only option here. She will never enjoy sex with him and he's not willing to put his wife through that. It sucks that roughly 1% of people is asexual, and only part of that never wants sex. It'll always be hard for us to find a partner. Hopefully she'll stop lying to herself and others now and see there's no bargaining sexuality.

it might be because you guys are young but sex is a very important part of a relationship.

Guys, friendos, Big Worm, Queen Protein dynamic duo, on this one I’ve gotta disagree with you guys on the first story. I feel like you guys got this fundamentally wrong and basically from the jump had your decision about the story made from when OP said he was gonna break up with his wife. You completely glossed over the fact that he mentioned “they” were in counseling, trying new things, trying to make things work, when in reality they were probably having these convos well before OP decided on divorce, and that last convo about her “finding out” she was ace was the straw that broke the camel’s back in essence. Then he basically found out the only one who was trying to actually make things work was him, and that she was lying through her teeth (I don’t think maliciously, but it’s a bad lie to withhold nonetheless) and withholding *VITAL* information about herself throughout their entire relationship. She’s just trying to placate and satiate him for a small time, and then hopefully she can hold him off until the next time she’s willing to grit her teeth and decide she can have sex. You kinda wildly glossed over the point that she was perfectly fine manipulating him for *YEARS* frankly by lying about her sexuality. Information about her sexuality that could’ve fundamentally changed the course of their lives, and she withheld information from him that would’ve given him the opportunity to make an informed decision, she stole his ability to make an informed decision from the jump all because she wanted him, that disgusting behavior idt you guys would be willing to give OP’s wife the benefit of the doubt if the sexes were reversed. Now, post-this entire saga and she finally comes open with the truth, she then decides she’s going to just _ignore_ him and decide unilaterally they’re not getting divorced? Pretending nothing is wrong in Ba Sing Se? Nah, that can’t fly. And she decides that she’s going to further manipulate him by just deciding to not get divorced. Then she just makes *ANOTHER* unilateral decision by just deciding, “oh, well we can’t have sex, just have sex with my friend, she’s ok with it, go have sex.” Like Jesus Christ, she’s so goddamn selfish the more I think about it. She’s just deciding everywhere and everything this relationship/marriage is going and going to do respectively. She’s acting like this is just her relationship and she can do what she wants with it and not *_their_* relationship, and she’s not communicating or addressing him at all in the decision making process. She’s actually an extremely manipulative, selfish individual, and frankly her sexuality as asexual is her cross to bear and she lied and manipulated OP into now bearing that cross. That’s *_YOUR_* sexuality, I’m sorry, you should navigate those waters on your own _unless_ you give any prospective partners all the information necessary for them to be able to decide on whether or not they want to navigate those waters with you. And lastly, you keep saying, “oh, it’s just sex, etc.” idt you know how demoralizing a sexless relationship is. Take it from someone who’s been there, it’s *FAR MORE* than just sex, it affects your outlook on the relationship, your feelings, your self esteem, it’s not “just sex.” And then put yourself in his shoes, he’s desperately trying to ignite the passion in their relationship and she’s secretly extinguishing it every time, and then pretending she doesn’t know herself why the flame is going out. Then after *_ALL OF THESE YEARS_* she drops the bombshell on him. She told him that she’s been ace for over and a decade and so many times while they had sex, she felt used. Holy fuck, can you imagine how that would feel to hear that from the most important person in your life? The person you swore to love, cherish, protect, and be there for, only to find out every time you had sex, you made her disgusted with herself (no fault of anyone there), and that you were hurting her mentally, emotionally, psychologically every time you had sex with her. I can understand why he had a breakdown tbh. He basically was told, “you’ve been using me for your own benefit, and you didn’t know, and you didn’t know how disgusted I was.” I would feel like I basically was r**ing my own wife at that point. I think I would throw up feeling like that. She went about this *ALL WRONG* and stole his autonomy, his ability to make informed consent, basically told him he’s been coercing her to have sex with him, while she didn’t want it, she basically offered to just let someone have sex with him when he loves her, and lastly told him she felt disgusted and used almost every time they had sex. She just dealt psychological blow after psychological blow to this man, and she may have and probably has done irreparable psychological damage to him, and it’s far more than “just sex.”

Kids these days want to live sexless lives. Sounds like they did a ton of therapy already. He tried everything. They aren't a match. Listen properly, you two.

Would love to hear Riley reading in place of Sophia sometimes ❤

So I am asexual, and the first OP is absolutely in the right for wanting to divorce. Sexual compatibility is an important thing in a relationship, and OP’s wife was not honest about her feelings towards sex. If they married with OP knowing she’s ace and does not enjoy sex, that’s one thing, but she didn’t even give him that option.

I don't know if it's because You guys are young or just because you're not married but You were being unfair to the husband. Sex is absolutely an important part of a happy marriage! Now it would be one thing if he went into this relationship knowing that she wouldn't want to have sex with him, but that was not the person he married. Did you guys even think about applying this to your own lives? Imagine you had a partner who you loved and had a great physical connection with who suddenly decided nah, We should never have sex again. Would you really want to spend the rest of your lives with them after having the rug pulled out from under you like that? Even if you love them? Nope. He's NOT the asshole, he's not "not accepting who she is" he already accepted who she PRETENDED to be. This seems so obvious to me. I don't know if you guys were just trying to be politically correct by making sex not a big deal. While you can be sympathetic with the wife. It is 100% her fault for deceiving him.

Usually I am ok with y’all’s takes on stuff but the two of y’all is willin with the “he needs to go to sex therapy”. If my wife with I have know and love for over 13 years stop having sex with me and there is no physical issue; I am gone. Y’all got to be drunk today. lol.

I wish Riley would state his own opinions rather than fearfully agreeing with what Sophia says just so that he doesnt get shot down. Sophia does not have a well rounded grasp of the world yet as she is young, and feels she knows more than she actually does. It would make the conversation better if she had pushback to challenge her opinions and to teach her that she isn't always right. She is definitely trying to be 'woke', but wokeness doesn't mean letting everyone do whatever they want, and shouting "break up" every time a partner does something wrong. It requires emotional intelligence and understanding of human behaviour to give a well rounded opinion. These videos of Sophia controlling the narrative and giving very narrow minded opinions in the name of "wokeness" are getting very tiresome. I hope this video isnt deleted again like the last time Sophia was called out.

honestly the last story gets even more sad when you go to the actual reddit account for the op. it wasn't a throwaway like most of these stories or a one and done account. it was a reddit account he had since 2013. you can see him engaging in dad humor, talking about his family and what makes it really sad is there was a post where he was asking for help on a symbolic tattoo to represent his wife and kids.

Ok really feels disgusting how negatively y'all talk about having sex be a deal breaker in a relationship. Why is asexuality acceptable but not sexuality or hyper sexuality? It's not just, x "There not the one for you.", you're also not the one for them.

Hey! Ace spec man here! I think sex isn't for everyone. Some couples dont have it for being ace n stuff. But I'd never get into a relationship with someone who DIDN'T know I was ace! Even if she didn't know, at first, it's not fair to the other party involved. Being ace doesn't give a free pass to lie or be a not great person.

As a sex repulsed asexual, I really don't think any of this was fair of the wife in the 1st story. Everyone needs to understand sexual compatibility is really important to maintaining a romantic relationship, and in a lot of ways she took away his autonomy in the relationship by keeping this hidden from him. You need to be up front with potential partners about your view and feelings on sex NO MATTER where you sit on the spectrum. He has the right to feel sex is important to him in a relationship, just as she has the right to not want to participate in sex. You cant have your cake and eat it too. Honestly appalling to just jump him with her friend in their marital bed like it was a non issue and a great solution. Gross.

I really don't know what else the husband was supposed to do. You wouldn't bat your eye if the wife had come out and said she was a lesbian. Of course they would get divorced. Her being asexual is just another way their sexualities are mismatched. It's unfortunate for everyone involved, but its just a fact. The wife lied, actively, for years. Of course he's done.

She lied and then just expects him to sleep with her friend.. that’s weird af

There's a thing called a no fault divorce... she could either sign, or she will be forced to in court + have to pay costs

The cute little "Ly too" at 35:03 😊 I feel weird about reading/listening to so much relationship drama from Reddit, but I think it makes me appreciate the relationships I have. Not perfect, but healthy. It's precious and I value them all the more knowing just how messy and painful things can get. Gives me the strength to get through tough conversations and not get defeated when things don't go the way I hoped.

AHHH!!! 😱I thought I was getting pulled over when you played the sirens, Riley!!!! Lol it really did make me jump. 😆

Being in a relationship with someone who is asexual is NOT easy...physical connection with one's partner is important for one's psyche.

These people are crazy to think this man should be ok with not having sex in his marriage. Sex isn’t just about intimacy. it is literally a biological need that a vast majority of the population crave and there is nothing wrong with that. She straight up manipulated him.

I'm happy to see the comments calling you two out on your horrible take on the first story cause wtf are y'all talking about. It's like you hear a sexuality that isn't straight and you lose all reasoning cause you're trying so hard to validate other sexualities. People do shitty things and they should be called out regardless of their sexuality.

Sex is super important to me. I’ve been in a relationship where the sex was awful. I questioned everything about me as a woman. Especially if he was attracted to me or not. He checked every other box on paper but I couldn’t get past the sex part. When I was dating I let men know how important sex is for me and if we are not sexually compatible I will end it. Luckily, i met my current partner soon and i love everything about him. Including our sex life. Telling someone that you’re asexual is a big punch in the gut. And then wanting your partner to sleep with someone else is disgusting. I agree with this man 100%.

I think it’s because you guys are still young and aren’t in the mindset of getting married, which is totally okay, you guys don’t understand how sex is a big and important factor in a marriage. When you marry someone with the knowledge that sex will be a given and then to have your significant other change up on you is not fair. In a marriage, it’s not just sex it’s an act of love and for men especially it’s how they feel wanted. The woman is just projecting how she wants to be loved, she could care less about having sex so it’s wrong of her to push that on to her husband. Edit: my point of view comes from being a 29 year old married woman

S1: What is the wife going to do if she pushed her husband to have sex with her friend and they develop feelings for each other? The emotional feelings come from the connections made through sex. Some can have affairs as just a good lay, but a majority of people will develop those feelings for each other. 🤷🏼‍♀️ The wife would be setting herself up for a more devastating heartbreak if her friend and husband fell in love with each other!

Sexual compatibility is important. Divorcing before cheating is the right thing to do.

She lied...for years. Had she been honest this may have been salvageable, or, he would have had some truth to base his decision off of. Ppl hating on this guy for no reason...

Communication is the key to a good relationship. People all seem to agree with the concept but tend to fumble when it comes to actually practicing it in real life. Understandable because communication can be really difficult, especially when you're trying not to hurt your partner or have been hurt by something your partner has done. But its so nessisary to be able to push through that discomfort and have a real, adult conversation where you and your partner listen to each other and yourselves. OP from story 1 wasn't the asshole imo

Edit: Saw a bunch more comments with a similar take, that gives me hope. It really did feel like you guys put the wife on a pedestal. She lied about who she was and kept a massive secret from OP. What's even worse is I bet OP realized that every single time they had sex in their relationship she was FORCING herself to do it. What a horrific and mentally damaging feeling he had to experience. You guys didn't address that at all. I got to disagree with you and a lot of other commenters on here that are saying it's just sex and he just rushed into divorce. He said prior to her saying she's asexual that they went to couples therapy, they tried adventurous things, they had open communication, and they've talked about the sex situation multiple times. And when she said "I am asexual" he respected her identity and said that he is not and therefore they're no longer compatible sexually which is very important in a relationship. If my husband suddenly never wanted to have sex with me ever again I would be absolutely devastated. I feel like if the situation was different and OP kept pushing and wanting to go to therapy about her being asexual and having a conversation with her over and over you guys would actually go on the camp of "he's not respecting her identity and he's trying to force her to have sex when she doesn't want to." So it seems like no matter which way, OP can't really win in this scenario with you guys. I think you're being unjustly harsh. At the end of the day people need to be compatible in all forms of need in a relationship. If one person's needs cannot be met and will never be met then it is not fair to one side of the relationship.

1st story. She should have disclosed that before the relationship got serious. She knew since day one she'd eventually lose interest in sex. So did her family. "I'm tired of being rejected for being ace" is not a valid reason to lie to your partner for years. If your relationship changes then you're allowed to reevaluate the relationship. Your partner suddenly loosing all sexually interested in you is your relationship changing. Sex isn't just about physical pleasure, it's also about feeling wanted and feeling connected. It's not a meaningless form of connection to most people. It's why cheating is so bad. Because it IS an intimate meaningful act. If it was meaningless and unimportant people would be whatever about them doing it with other people. Cheating only matters because the act has meaning. Dismissing him being upset when sex is suddenly and permanently denied as just him "valuing sex more than his relationship" is honestly a really bad take.

I know that in modern society, men naving emotions, and emotional needs, is not really considered important. But i am still disappointed in this reaction. Men want to be wanted, in a relationship. Men have just as much of a need to be desired, at least those men looking for a partner for life. How would you feel if you were suddenlt told that the person you loved, that you trusted, enough to get married, was never actually attracted to you? That they have been forcing themselves to have sexwith you. Hen you fi d out they, and their family, knew abojt this for years, and never decided to tell you. It is a huge betrayal. It means the whole relationship was a lie. She could have been honest, and perhaps looked for an asexual partner herself. Consider a woman who marries a gay man, and he knew he was gay, and not attracted to women, and would take pills once a month to pretend to be interested in sex with her, but never had any interest. Women have needs, and part of those needs are feeling attractive and wanted by their partner. And finding out that partner knowingly hid the truth from her, and married her, to hide their real orientation, is certainly grounds to divorce them. Asexuality is just like that, in this case. The asexual wife knew she would never be truly interested in sex with this man, and kept trying to draw things out, to make him wait,thinking that if she kept things going this way, for long enough, it wouldn't matter. It's premeditated. And he really did love her. He has trauma from feeling like this woman he !oved felt like she was being raped every time they bad sex. I don't think anybody here has taken his trauma seriously. Disappointed but not surprised.

15:24 I understand why OP is upset. They were lied to and was shown false expectations in the relationship. It’s the same if she wasn’t ace but gay. She can’t force herself to change her sexuality to keep a man. Also, to reduce this whole thing to if you want sex just do it elsewhere. The problem may have started sex but the big picture is the relationship was started on a lie. I wonder why she didn’t find another ace person to be with?

1:42 Idk that it is. This is sexual incompatibility. Like, if your partner came out as gay, what else would you have to talk about? It’s not the most important thing, but accepting this means OP is signing up for a life of little to no sex.

She knew that she was asexual when she got into the relationship. So therefore I think she kind of lied to him in a way by stringing him along for so long and not telling him what he was getting into

The woman cheating because her partner was in a "dark place" and didn't make her "100% happy" is being very selfish. You're not going to be happy 100% of the time, and all relationships include having to do some work. Edit: okay, that was an understatement

3:01 Riley, seriously? A sex therapist? For wanting sex after 3 weeks of no sex? What's wrong with you? It's not like he's asking for it several times a day, or every day, or several times a week. That poor man was lied to. He is completely healthy, libido wise. That's not a sex addiction. Once a month? Come on.

Sophia dropped the ball on the first story 🫠

I’m 26 and I plan on having some framed photos on the wall. Currently the only framed photos in mine and my husband’s apartment are on the dresser and the bookshelf

Hope you guys do the in person event on a weekend. Been watching from the beginning I’m in the aria and would love to go

Guys, you really messed up with the 1st story. If my partner told me they felt r*pe by me? I'll want to vomit, faint, would felt like the worst person in the world.

I love Sophia and Riley but i miss John and Sam... i cant watch the streams because of timing and work has been crazy... are John and Sam just do streams now?

3:08 why does OP need the sex therapist?! OP has normal expectations! Idk how he’s in the wrong here, even before we find out how horrible she is. Tbh, i wouldn’t be compatible with someone who is asexual either. I feel bad for them both and i can see how the wife got to the point where she made a lot of her poor decisions, but it’s not fair to OP.

The dad opening daughter’s mail-hell no. I would have had a PO Box long before that point. Dad is so far out of line. Good for her turning the table on him. She should have filed a complaint with the post office. That is a federal crime.

It doesn't matter if it's the biggest aspect, it's an important one for him.

Just woke up from having a nightmare! So glad I have okop to watch like cartoons after a scary movie 😂❤

I didn’t see anyone comment on printing and framing photos but I’m 24 and still love printing as many photos as I can and have plenty framed ones in my apartment but I am sentimental haha

Re: open relationships - I only ever had once rule, I am number one in any relationship. If there are others, I don't really care, just be honest with me about it. I actually helped my husband's "special friend" to bathe after an injury, he visited her maybe once a month, and I was OK with that. Years later, he found someone younger, I was no longer number 1, and we divorced. My second husband who died recently did NOT believe in open marriage, and I was fine with that too. But this definitely should be addressed pre long term commitment.

I can't be with a person who doesn't like sex, it's one of my love languages you can say. I would feel betrayed by her and wouldn't see another way than divorce. For me this is like the question about children. If one really wants them and the other one doesn't want children, it will not work. Sex is for a lot of people the same, if you don't fit, it's difficult to work. Specially if you know that when she has sex with you it's because she wants you to be happy, but doesn't feel the same. It's not the most important in a relation, but for me having good sex with my partner is in the top 3 or 5 at least. You can love someone soooo much, but if the sexlife sucks, it's frustrating if you have a high libido. And on average men have higher libido than women, so I can't say he is an asshole. He is just not ready to give up sex or have sex with another woman in this marriage. For people who think sex is not so important, he can look like an *ssh*le. But he is just being honest with himself, they need both to be happy in the relation. You need to accept from both sides, even when it's hard and you love them. But staying together unhappy is not the solution. She knows her sexuality since she was a child, she needs to find a way to be upfront to a guy in the beginning and understand that she will have to accept that some men don't want this kind of relation. Because of my health I can't have children and don't want them either, when children come up on a date I am just honest and ofcourse it hurts when a guy likes you, but really want kids. It is what it is, each has to find their yin to your yang.

I couldn't live without sex in a relationship. Intimacy is a huge thing for me and sex is incredibly important to me with my partner. To look down on him because he left when things weren't acceptable for him is ridiculous. She doesn't want sex and he does. When they got married she wasn't open about who she was. They aren't compatible. There is nothing wrong with leaving a situation when both people are going to be miserable because its not what they want.

1st Story: Asexuality is a spectrum. Some love sex, some get physically ill at thought of it. Some enjoy sex, some tolerate it and some hate it. It sounds like OP's wife is fraysexual, which is part of the Asexual spectrum. They generally enjoy sex with people they don't know, but that attraction decreases the more they get to know each other. There is more to a relationship than sex, but if one of the partners feels like it is an important part and the other doesn't, then it will bring up problems later on. It's best to end it now.

As someone whose asexual, op's wife SUCKS. She KNEW and still lied to him?! Bro, that's fucked up not only to lie about your sexual preferences but to also put op in that position of making him hurt someone he cares about. She desperately needs therapy and possibly even look for other asexual people to date rather than straight or gay. Despite my sexuality, I do believe sex is an important aspect of a relationship, whether they want it or not. I don't want it, therefore I cannot bring myself to stay in a relationship with someone who does because we have different expectations for the relationship.

I think you absolutely should accept your partner for how they are as long as they are transparent about everything especially before marriage The wife is 100% the a-hole it's a really sad situation because her intentions were good but all she did was hurt both of them

13:34 Do you want to look up conversion therapy next?!

lol first story L take, and her friend is wild!! hey can you sleep with my husband? i cant anymore, yeah i got you hahaha. i hope they find happiness again weather is with each other or not

Nobody is 100% happy. She’s gonna be less happy than she thinks.

Came here to look at the comments about the 1st story.. im glad i wasnt the only one that thought they had a bad take on it.

Staring contests!! 😂😂😂

A sexuality isn't who you are. She lied. Stop identifying with labels.

i'm 33 & my 1 aunt still sends me $100 on my bday & xmas, lol. i think the tradition in our family is until they're married.

Someone has to make a sigh counter for every video

Op who's wife cheated needs to go get a divorce. He needs to put her out.

asexuals can just find eachother ol, they shouldn't doom sexual people into a sexless life sleeping next to the ;person they desire.

He can’t get over the affair with the coach because she hasn’t ended it yet.

The story about the dad opening the mail is f** up. Why would he open OPs mail. Even if the mistress sent mail disguised as business mail it does not make any sense for her to adress it to anyone else but to him. So mail with his daughter's name could not be for him anyways, that is just logical. But well, his paranoia was his downfall in the end.

"When it's like so obvious she's just like trying to keep this relationship going". . . Uh, no, it could have just as easily been a trick. Considering she kept very important information about herself secret, this would not be obvious to him at that time.

Personally don’t think you’re guys take on the first story was the best. Sex is not the only intimacy you can get in a relationship however you cannot fault some one for needing sex in a marriage/relationship it didn’t sound like he wanted it daily which would definitely be asking too much but for him to be lied to the whole relationship then just expected to be ok with the sudden change he had no knowledge of or say in it’s in his court how to proceed and I don’t like you Sophia instantly jumped to faulting him saying he jumped the gun when we have a reference of time that doesn’t make it seem too quick of an action