I was mad at God, then this happened.... 

It's so scary. It's hurts and I'm so angry at God. Like I'm so mad at God. And it's growing. On the one hand He has fully delivered me from alcoholism, addiction, cigarettes, porn, musterbation and all that, those are things ive prayed for and God has TAKEN AWAY ONE BY ONE AMEN, however when it comes to jobs, my finances, my lack of career. My dying RU-vid channel,not meeting my husband. So many things. Like I can't even afford to buy panties, but He has also delivered me. So I feel so bad. Yet so angry. Yes I have no desire to read the word or pray.

I’m currently going through this... it’s almost as if I’m grieving my old life/ old seasons. Honestly ion know how to overcome this.. I overcame depression last year and the same time this year I’m depressed again. & i came to realization that i love Jesus but i still don’t love myself. God forgives me but ion forgive myself it’s like self sabotage. Thank u for your vulnerability sis. 🙏🏾

I’m in a period of forced isolation, it’s not fun-it hurts deeply. I’ve prayed and read the Bible every day. Yesterday I read the book of Job and I suddenly got so mad at God-I couldn’t control it. It scares me and I’ve been asking for clarity from God, so many things make no sense to me.

If you have loving parents who check up on you to make sure you’re ok, you’re not alone. You don’t know how much of a luxury that is. Some people really have no one who checks on them, parents who don’t even remember birthdays, or no one who cares whether you live or die. Good parents and caring siblings are priceless. A thousand more blessings to you.

I’m currently going through this…I have been up crying angry and hurting…I’ve felt a lot of silence recently I haven’t been hearing from God…i won’t lie i was yelling at him with tears because I feel so alone and like he hasn’t cared or listened…I got so upset that I told him I give up that I can’t do it anymore……not long after I started crying apologizing seeking for forgiveness for my anger but now I feel even more like he’s left me behind….

That line where you said “if you ask God for something he’s going to do it” is the absolute TRUTH. This’s why I tell many, when you ask God to do something in your life *within his will* like removing people who aren’t supposed to be there, pray for him to give you the strength to endure. Because there will be people you least expected, who will leave your life. Don’t say that prayer unprepared! Amazing video 💕✨

This year I lost my entire family. My sister, brother and mother all passed away leaving me alone in this world. I’ve been so anger with God. I’m not sure how to overcome these feelings. Thank you so much for this video.

Your glow alone shows how much God is working in your life.

I been through the same season for years. I wouldn't say I'm angry but I am tired of disappointment and watching everyone get their blessings that I have prayed for especially when they were people that hurt me. I'm just used to the negative so I'm in the not bothered phase of just not caring or feeling. I'm numb

Being honest with God is soooo important!! I loved this 🥺

I'm struggling with pride..been angry and resentful towards God and this has really harden my heart. It becomes hard to even talk to God and this has affected my relationship with God greatly.

About 15 minutes ago I told the lord that I’m angry with him, 10 minutes ago I saw your content popped up on my phone, I’m like whattttt lol then I started listening and now a girl in tears, I pray that god heals my heart and provide for me my hearts desires, this video is so on time🙏🏽❤️❤️❤️thank you for being obedient to the Holy Spirit 😊

I was recently angry at God because of what I went through from childhood to my adulthood. I’m still angry and resentful towards God a bit that he allowed things to happen from my narcissistic mother and other people. Being bullied for being the square girl . It still hurts. I’m still working on it

I'm not angry at God anymore I realized it's not God's fault but I'm still in a defeated thought process about this new season I'm in. Alone. Absolutely no one to turn to . And tired of being alone an wishing my life would be good already

I’m definitely at this point right now ... I just feel like he ain’t hearing me. 😞.. I feel like Giving my life to God just made my life more Harder .

I have literally prayed the same prayers. Somewhere last year, and God really answered them. One by one, he answered my prayers. I did feel hopeless at some point, but then it started to make sense. God’s ways are higher than our ways. Thank you for sharing this, sis🤎 God bless you and keep you in this season🙏🏾✨

Pride and disobedience. This was my folly. God gave me EXACTLY what I prayed for to the T. And then I idolized the blessing without even knowing it and then became proud, disobedient, broke promises to God about this blessing. And then he snatched it…. I have been praying for him to return that blessing to me for the past 2 months and 16 days. I realize that had he not taken the blessing for the moment that I wouldn’t have realized I was doing these things against The Lord. I was so mad at God and sometimes the frustration still comes back. I thank him for showing me the error of my ways. Now I’m praying he returns/resurrects the blessing since I have learned and changed. I’m praying and believing it’s not a situation where I’ve been kicked out of the garden but instead it’ll be like Lazarus and Jesus will resurrect the blessing/relationship.

The fact that she always looks good & dresses her best >>>

I'm going through this as well. I find myself in my heart trying to be the centre of attention and hero in my own story instead of letting go and letting God. I'm currently praying against it though and it's nice getting these helpful tips in this video.

Came across your video after realizing my anger at god was happening. Never did I imagine somebody else would have gone through this exact obstacle. I found so much peace in my heart after watching the video through and listening to your experience. I truly believe god led me to your story. Thank you for sharing this, god bless ❤

Be encouraged y’all. Your praying, your honesty, your petition to God is not in vain. I just got through depression and feeling hopeless and impatient bc I’d been seeking God for a move and peace. After a few months God has truly moved and revealed so much to me. I felt his presence soooo strong and heavy like never before and he met me. He is GOD. ALMIGHTY. PERFECT IN ALL HIS WAYS. Continue to ask for understanding and wisdom in him.

This helped a lot. Lately God has been revealing that my heart was the root to all my problems. Thank you for being so open, just to know that I’m not alone and their are other brothers/sisters in Christ that struggle and deal with things as well just shows that were nothing without Jesus ❤ God bless you !

I’m going through a tough phase, but Jesus is close to me. He loves me deep down I feel it. I pray for everyone out there, may the Lord comfort you and give you peace

Sometimes I get so angry at God & I yell at him because I need to vent it to him. Once I do that, I apologize to God & thank him for allowing me to vent, followed by asking him to help me release my anger & fear and to help me strengthen my trust in him. God wants us to have a personal relationship with him, & sometimes in relationships we get angry & need to vent it. The important thing is we don't get stuck in that anger.

ive had alot of Shi happen to me throughout my life, even after being born again through Jesus Christ! so i have a love/hate relationship with GOD, just being honest.

Im so angry at God that I don’t wanna pray or anything as you said. I don’t kno how to let go of this pride because it’s so strong in my life. I’ve lost hope tbh. And it all just makes me angrier

Hi Kiki I delated insta and Pinterest today 😅 thank you and God❤ today is my birthday 🎉 I hope see you in heaven you’re so cool girl keep doing 👏👏👏🤩

I'm going through the samething sis. i was that dude telling all my friends to stop fornicating just basically preaching to them every chances i get. Firstly, I didn't have a job for many years, eventually I got one .I was happy that God heard my prayer as soon as I started the job, my TM was just straight threatening me regarding termination requesting me to do things that I wasn't trained for, and whenever you ask her for help, is either she gives you the wrong information or she ignores you. totally. everything about my daily activities just started going wrong from the company's software not working and not getting answers from the support team and all . I became heavily stressed out with anxiety,I couldn't sleep so I went to the doctors and I was diagnosed with diabetes type 2. I was lost, I felt unprotected by God . I couldn't talk to my friend about God anymore.I was confused, even one of my friends somehow took a shot at me , and to make the matter worse, the company I was working for laid me off from my job saying that they where over staffed . I was ashamed, angry. Now, I am in a dilemma as to how to get a good reference from my TM regarding my next job and i dont want to lie on my resume. but i know God is faithful still,perhaps i don't know where he's taking me too. I mean, I couldn't talk to God like I do everyday in the park and I can sense the devil saying where your God now, trying to yank off my built up faith in Christ, and that ain't going to happen regardless of what I am going through. Pray for me Kiki.

Recently, I voiced out my struggles to God, which I hardly ever do and I asked for help. The thing is I write a lot instead of being vocal about things, and like you said, I tend to want to figure things out alone. I didn’t really think much about me reaching out like that but when I found the answer in my writing and when everything clicked, I just broke down into tears. God really is listening and is always there for us, if only we let down our pride. Thank you for sharing sister 🌕🤍🦋

I was just balling my eyes out to God, angry at Him for allowing me to go through so much pain alone but your video popped up and yeah, all I can say is thank you. Thank you so much. I definitely needed the reminder of all of those things and it brought me peace. This video definitely helps many. Thank you and God bless you. You got this girl

I have been angry at God all week. Resentful. I have had such a hard time with this & this video helped me so so so much. I ended up journaling to God begging for help to soften my heart and bring me back closer to him. Thank you for posting this ❤

this is me rn 🥺🥺 i feel very alone and bored but i know deep down inside it's for a reason. I also think to, im not alone im at peace 💛

Didn’t realize I’m going through this until I was told to click on this video and just started crying first few seconds in

I’ve literally been in the same exact boat since April of this year. I’m just now starting to see the purpose of this season but I was so angry and resentful towards God at first. The good thing about seasons is that they change😭 I stopped resisting and I’m starting to feel a shift again. God bless you! Your channel makes me feel less isolated🙏🏽

Girl…you’re gifted. Continue to do the work of the Kingdom. 💕

Algorithm really does know me well. I actually needed to hear this so thank you. I was once too angry at God, whenever something never works out, I get angry and throw a fit mentally to God. I've overcome that over the years. I realized that God or any of the people around me are not the problem. I realized that I'm the problem. I've prayed for so many things that I've been praying for for years now. Right now I have officially lost hope. I'm even afraid now of my own happiness because bad things might happen next. I realized that I'm just not skilful, talented, hard working or good enough to go to a place that I want to be in. I lack drive and passion which is my biggest struggle right now. I'm just officially tired, wanting to to not live anymore, lost, soulless, and hopeless while being numb with emotional pain. My family and friends can't help me, I have to help myself. I decided to just be more realistic with my hopes and desires by not wanting it anymore, even though I still do. I just think that I'm undeserving of God's grace since I'm just a sinful, ungrateful, and selfish of a human being. 2021 and 2022 has just been filled with failures and heartbreaks when it comes to my growth and career. I'm just overall done and tired. So now I just gave up. I hate myself even more now. I'm in the place that I don't want to be in. Maybe I do deserve it, because of all the mistakes and sins that I have committed from the past to this day. Despite of all the failures I've experienced, I still love and praise God no matter what until my last breath. I'm forever greatful for all the blessings he gave my family and I from the past to now. Maybe my goals and dreams aren't really meant for me. I'm just meant to live a sad, simple, and depressing life till the day I die. I've accepted that. Being hopeful is dangerous and has only made me feel worst, so now I'm just going with a flow. Maybe I was just so desperate and delusional. It's my fault that's why I'm miserable. I'll just pray for my family and I's health and that's it. No more dreaming about dream job or happiness that I've been longing for since I don't plan on taking the action towards my goals because I don't know how or where to start. I'll just pray for simpler small things and that's it. Dreaming big will only led me to more pain and disappointments. 14:15 I really needed to hear that so thank you. Only time will tell. I just really need to get this out of my chest. What a relief 😌

girl you make it so fun n casual talking about God, i love it 😭💖 i was smiling when u were talking about the list of ur answered prayers, He really did that

It has really been a journey 😩, but our strength comes from the lord!! your glow Kiki😍❤

I love your video!!! I just recognized that we are in November and as I analyzed this year and listened to you, I realized that I am in the season that I prayed for. It was tough but God had a plan. He even elevated me in front of my enemies which showed me something else about Him. He don’t play about His kids. I learned two things in this seasonal year: 1.) I had to value myself 2.) Really back up my faith with trust in God that He will take care of my needs. I’m not a patient person and He knows that but man I learned a lot from Him this year! This is amazing!

Im 50 years old.. i have been upset at God. i felt bad. I did a search on rhis topic, your video came up. I was like, should i watch? What can this young girl say to me??😅 Giirrrll, 👏👏👏👏 ❤❤❤ you are very mature n the flow of your content was great.. God Bless you..Pastors dont touch is this subject very much..n im sure many many people go through this. Any how great job..

Yeah sister you are not alone, it’s so nice to know I’m not alone. Much love sister.

Me asking God to win the lottery, knowing very well that it's the root of all evil.. trying to run away from my family, help build our church and have a fresh start somewhere else... It hurts

I stumbled across this right after I was internally venting to God, so I know Holy Spirit is at work. I’ll be honest. This hasn’t helped me one bit. I already know these verses and have spoken to Him and vented to Him in anger, tried to humble myself + tried to repent in prayer, did all- yet my patience is still running thin. I didn’t do it to get what I want- I did it because I wanted Him by my side and my spirit urged me to. I’ve been through hell for 16 months- endured it as we all must (as good soldiers of Christ) and I still can’t catch a break, it’s just been back-to-back obstacles + warfare + wickedness +jealousy + meeting people who aren’t doing their due diligence. I know I’m not perfect and not deserving of His grace but I’m really questioning why I’m here and am starting to prefer death over life. I’m wondering just how big my purpose must be for me to be fought heavily like this. Is all this worth my purpose? I want to throw in the towel. I’ve been angry at God a few times, but normally there’s a peace that enters my heart after speaking to Him, whether He answers me or not. This time, it’s created more anger. I’m in tears as I write this both because of the ongoing warfare and me not wanting to hurt God as He sits with me in the furnace and prunes me. These thoughts are by virtue of me being under intense spiritual attack- but the truth is I don’t want to fight anymore- I’m left with no strength- I don’t even have the strength to ask God for strength, but if I don’t- God’s name doesn’t get glorified. It’s so hard being in survival mode.

I literally had this break down the other day with God. All the things I learned and found comfort in i had to get rid. I was never alone giiirl it was so much to accept where i was mad and didn't speak to him but taking matters into my own hands which led me to stress and fall back into sin just to escape the feeling. Which made it worse because I actually care about God and his point of view . Where now im at a stage of accepting my old ways are not good for me and learning how to express myself with God regardless of how i feel .

Currently going through this as well. So many things were taken from me since March but I know God has a new season for me

Today was literally the first day I ran towards God with my pain, hurt and resentment. I can relate to what you are saying. Thank you for sharing this testimony. God bless you.

“Grief intermission” I felt that. ❤

Obedience is better than sacrifice! When I tell you it’s been so hard for me to be obedient to what God is telling me to do

Yess. Cause sometimes the enemy doesn't project himself but projects self. It's very important to put our pride aside cause all the enemy needs is just an opportunity!

I used to be angry at God and now I’m moving out of this season and out of a season of being angry at myself and into a season of forgiving myself, loving myself, recognizing what I need. It’s such a tiring thing because old habits are no longer serving who I’m becoming. I feel like it’s going to be a lifelong process

I’m struggling with this right now I have been angry, prideful and not patient with my walk with God I will get angry about how I don’t have the fire like our fellow brothers and sisters and why my relationship is not where I want it to be, but I need to realize my Faith and my relationship with God will grow with obedience, Faith and taking it one step at a time, as well as just leaving it in his hands. Thank you for this video!!

thank God for your honesty❤coz i'm also fighting against a cycle of being led by emotions and feelings to a point where Im mad at God.*the righteous shall live by faith* verse really helped me.

God spoke through you in this, absolutely amazing thank you so much, stay blessed and succesfull!!!

This is nice, you just gave me a sort of hope…

Oh sis, DONT be afraid to post YOUR truth. I’m VERY angry at God right now.

Thank you for this!

Having quiet time right now and I've been secretly mad at God for about two months and I'd just started to hash it out with Him in Quiet time today. So I came on RU-vid to look for worship music to worship with and the first thing I saw was your video. Haha I'm like Okay, Jesus let's go. When you said we're standing in seasons we prayed for, I felt that. Feltttt it. Been praying John 15 since forever and I realised oh yes, this is the pruning that comes with Growth. Thank you for this Kiki.

My birthday is august 16 and that devo was speaking right to me. Also the fact that God has been telling me that if he gave me all the things I wanted right now I wouldn’t be ready for the blessings spiritually!

I needed this. Thank you.

Love this video, thank you ❤

Thank you so much for this❤

I believe God allowed me to see this video , when I opened RU-vid and scrolled and found this video because I'm going through the same right now . I remember I prayed for God to expose the things in my heart and when he did through dreams and to other people in their dreams I became angry and bitter and gave up on God because I didn't want to be a bad person or to have those things in my heart towards people and God . I was angry at myself and took it out on God like why was I even born or alive if I'm struggling with these things in my heart . My heart became hard towards God to the point I didn't feel sorry for my sins but now I'm running back to him to change my heart to be sensitive to his spirit and to restore my conviction

This came at the right time. Last night I broke out crying to God . I wasn’t blaming him but I was just asking Him how I managed to mess up my life and I just wanted Him to show me what I did wrong and fix it. I have been so angry towards people and I end up gossiping about them 😢

This spoke to my situation! Thank you!

Absolutely loved this video!⭐️

Thank you for dropping this video. I am going through a season of being ALONE and I too was mad at God but, seeing you stand on your faith while being obedient has increased mine!

Perfect timing. I’ve been feeling every inch of this. Thank you for sharing ❤

Thanks for this informational vid!♥️♥️

This resonates with me❤glad you dropped this video sister!

You are speaking to me. I cried so much watching this. God is always on time. We just have to be patient and committed to the dream. Thank you so much!

I believe I did not come across this video by accident. I have been 7 and a half month unemployed, chronic Lyme disease, parents that do not believe my illness and gossip and tell others all my business , lost all friends

Girlllllllllll. All I’m going to say is thank you so much ❤🙏🏾

I needed to hear this and Thank you for sharing your story sis!! I’m going through a similar season even regarding school. I’m currently going through a phase or resentment and feeling like I can fix my own problems. I’m glad I came across your video to remind me that I need to lean on God and ask for help. God has brought me this far and I know he will never forsake me! Power to you sis and keep going ❤🙏🏾

sis, we needed dis!

Oooph!😩 I've been grieving my old life since January. I renounced EVERYTHING, was led to fast for more than a month, was skin and bone, depressed/suicidal, threw out everything from my past (some of those things were brand new, newish, it broke me), gave up all of my old habits and patterns. The result. I got delivered from nicotine, weed, suicide + depression. I didn't really drink much, but that too dried up. I started reading my Bible and I humbled myself and made apologies to people who genuinely 'think' their victims, but I had to keep my side clean and keep it pushing. I made peace with my past and forgave the people I needed to forgive. I started listening to sermons, watched Biblical movies, started praying and praising and worshipping with songs and dance. Listen to scriptures while I sleep and as a background noise, etc. The last week of my birthday month, January, I heard a diabolical laughing voice, as I was waking up but I could still feel my body laying on my bed. It crashed into my body as if it wanted to either shuff my spirit out my body or as if it wanted to maybe drag me through the bed, like into another dimension or something? People have so many hell encounters like that, but as it literally felt as if I was falling through the bed, but I became aware I was still on the bed, I felt a strong hand wrap around my ankle and start to pull me off the bed - to wake me up? No idea but I was grateful and immediately went into praise and worship with Shackles from Mary Mary. The result?! I had a Godly encounter between 12-3am the morning and it was AMAZING! I've NEVER felt that kind of love and acceptance and compassion. We think we know what love is, but we truly don't. I didn't want to wake up. If it had been an OBE and I was given the choice of staying or returning, I would've stayed. I'm telling you, I'm not throwing away my salvation for anybody!!! If I have to die upside down on a cross, or be poor for the rest of my days, but I'll see God in his fullness, best believe, I'll be a martyr!!!

I’m going through the exact same season wow. I just finished a prayer in asking God for help. Then this video pops up on my feed…ur prayers were my prayers a while back & they’re coming to pass now! Wow😩🙏🏿

Thank you for your transparency this is currently a season I’m going through as well , I no longer feel angry at God I’m more thankful

Appreciate you sharing this… I just went through this and finally Jesus delivered me 🙌🏽

Thank you Kiki, this softened my heart. I appreciate your vulnerability and exposure. I felt that I wasn't alone and that another was going through anger and resentment towards God and that it's okay to know that and be there, but not stay there. Your points were convicting, peace-filled and encouraging. This is my first time on the channel and I'm a new subscriber. I am hoping the best for you. Btw you look so beautiful 😍, you are just glowing. I need to find my skin care routine and get my skin like that. My mix of stress and harmful products aren't working 😂. Blesssed day!

Hi 👋 just wanted to let you know that it is awesome to see that you are able to go through this process and that you are still able to humbly strengthen your brothers and sisters in the midst of it! God bless!

This randomly popped up on my feed, and I know it's a sign. I feel it. Thank you so much for sharing your heart like this. Sending you love! 💜

Thank you for allowing God to use you. Truly blessed by this ❤

I needed this

Thank you for this...

Thanks for sharing this valuable information.

I love this so much, thank you for your boldness

Hey love, thank you so much for this. At 9:01 you touch on something I have been praying on. I have been going through a period of dried up creativity and this morning I got the wisdom that all my life I have been working and that blocked me from seeing God's grace and now I am being asked to sit back and relax while God is working on grace so I can finally see it. Much love.

this was refreshing, honest, and hopeful. God bless you 💗

Thank you sharing…. Very spirit led, and full of wisdom and revelation. God bless you 🙏🏽❤️

I love this video. God bless you!

Girl! Get out my business! 😬😅 Thank you so much for sharing this. I can totally relate. I'm in a season of stillness right now. What you said hit home. I prayed for this. I prayed for a deeper relationship with him, more time to get in my word and to hear from him more clearly and he has granted me just that. It's been quite hurtful, separating from people and even my business. I now have all the time in the world to sit in his presence and I'm mad. Whew! I hear you, Lord. Let me be grateful for this time of rest and stillness and get my life together so I'm prepared for what's to come. ❤ God bless you for your honesty.

The entire prayer I had then I saw this. Eager to watch.

This is crazy ! I was just crying to God and telling him I was mad at him and knowing I am in the season I prayed for , and this video pops up . 😢God bless

Thank you for creating this video! I went through a similar situation recently, and all the feelings and thoughts you shared are ones that I had during this time. This alone encourages me that being angry at God can be a common thing that happens in our lives, and I don't have to feel like I'm doing something bad (because it is a natural occurrence in human emotion). Most importantly, how you talk about choosing to put pride aside to be humble before Him and ask Him to help you is essential for the next step of the process! Every detail included in this video was done beautifully

Amen, Glad, everything is working out for you. I'm in grad school currently in Psychology and in the process of changing colleges. we can be upset in the season we are in but good things do happen. All things work out for those who love God and Jeremiah 29:11. Also all things are possible with God. Thank you, for sharing your story.

Sister continue been a blessing am in that stage too. His preparing us for something big that we don’t even wish for ourselves, your very beautiful your skin is glowing his shining on you ❤keep it up be strong . Much love 💕

I appreciate your words and for sharing. I love that you notice how we can be living in what we prayed to God for a year or two years ago...really makes us think about how he answers our prayers in God's timing.

Im so glad I found this video. This is something I went through and I thought I was alone but I feel better to know I’m not the only one.

Wow, it’s the way God sent this video to me! God bless you❤️🙏🏿

This video is so healing. So glad he was able to give you understanding and peace and able to speak through you. Lord I thank you 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙌🏾