Imposter Syndrome w/ Kati Morton | Tea Break 

Alex you are doing so great these past weeks. I almost forgot about your channel until you started posting again. And now I remember why I subscribed to you. You are so smart and likeable. Thank you for the amazing content!! (and if you are ever in the Netherlands, please do a meet-up.)

Been there, felt that. Still do, sometimes. Got 17 years professional programming experience, spoke at several conferences, wrote for programming magazines, ended up co-organizing our own local conference... and still, I cringe when people want to label me an expert. It's gotten better though once I came to the realization that the root of this feeling is that once you really start to understand the concepts of your profession, gather experience, network with peers, know where to inform yourself about what's going on in your field... you realize that there's so much shit going on, so much new stuff coming out, being researched, getting written... so much new technology and new means to use and combine these technologies... lots more complexity each and every year - you just can't know it all. Ever. Even if you niche down and become an expert in one tiny, narrow portion of your profession, tomorrow some new stuff will inevitably come to light in your niche and you will have a gap in your knowledge again. It's a neverending game of playing catch-up and you have to constantly learn new stuff, every day, all your life - or you will become obsolete. That's why, for programmers, it's easy to feel like you will never be an expert, even if, technically, to most other people on this planet, you absolutely are. It also is why programming is such a great profession: It always stays exciting :-)

I came from Kati's channel and it's actually so funny that you put this video out at this time! I have been feeling this a lot lately.

Thank you so much for this video. I continue to enjoy your videos, and can't wait for more. :)

Great video! I needed this.

This is a great idea for a series. Increasing awareness and self-understanding, reducing stigma for these these kinds of things is always good. Just knowing that something has a name and that there are people like me who have overcome it is so relieving.

This is such an important topic. Thanks for introducing it!

Looking forward to more of these! I will say that when people talk about imposter syndrome, it can sound like it only applies to brilliant and insecure students who are actually doing really well and just don't know it. It took me a while to realize that even if you're struggling or falling short, that doesn't mean you're faking it and don't belong. Even if you don't recognize the virtuous cycle of hardwork and self-doubt Kati Morton described (if only it worked that way), you should still take this conversation to heart.

I really needed this today. Thank you.

Hi, Alex, thank you for your video! This is the second month of my Ph.D. I start feeling I should not be here, it is really helpful to find someone have the same feeling as me!! Keep updating!

wow...this was really comforting to see...i definitely experienced this without having a name for it

As a recent PhD candidate, I just found out what Imposter Syndrome is and that I've had the feeling too. Since I am working as a researcher and a PhD student (picked out of circa 150 candidates for my research position), I often got confidence in the thought that since I was the one picked they see potential in me to do and complete this project while not being able to see this for myself (aka being the fraud). Thanks so much for this video! You just got yourself a new subscriber :)

Loved this video, looking forward to more Tea Breaks! Also related, a while ago I watched this TED talk on "Your body language shapes who you are" which talks about the effects of 'power poses' on you and how you are seen, but she also talks a bit about her experience with Imposter Syndrome, the advice she was given was 'Fake it until you believe it'.

i have watched your vids since i declared biology as my major. i love them!

Thanks for making this video! I recently asked to make one on Kati's facebook page... Don't know if it was somehow in response to it :)) but thanks anyways for clarifying things in your ways! Looking forward to seeing your upcoming videos! Subscribed to Alex's channel too!

i read about this and said no this cant be me and indeed it made grad school really hard. In retrospect i remember i would believe that other scientists were doing somthing more interesting or with more impact. And my work was just busy work and that just wasn't true. Getting the motivation to stay 12 hours over a bench on somthing i believe was insignificant was taxing. I know now it wasn't true but gosh did it make it hard.

Wow, I feel like this resonates with me, too. I got my bachelor's in physics, but I constantly feel like I wasn't really derserving of the degree. It's one of the primary reasons I haven't pursued higher education; I thought I would just be parading around as a physicist until some mistake revealed me to be a fraud. Ironically, I now work in a GIS position with co-workers from geo-based backgrounds, and I feel like less of an imposter whilst having no GIS education beyond on-the-job training.

Great idea

I love watching Alex try to talk with one of her hands occupied. The struggle!

Wow, a very good topic. I first found it helpful when a colleague directly told me about impostor syndrome and basically told me that I had it. They had the perspective of seeing my work and hearing how I talked about myself in relation to it and that I basically was not giving myself enough credit. They opened up and told me that they experienced it when they were younger as well, and we've talked about it on a few occasions now. It hasn't gone away, but I'm trying to take more pride in my work and trying to think less in the way that I'm a fish out of water. I don't think I've heard about CBT before. That might be quite helpful. Great video, Alex and Kati!

I admire you people, I wanted to go to grad school, but my anxiety and depression made me reconsider it, I think the pressure would destroy me.

Oh wow! I just realized that the feeling I always have has a name and it's imposter syndrome. Thanks for this video Alex. I kept smiling all throughout the video because i can relate to everything you two said

Heh... it only gets worse with age. Like when you get a really big and important job, because people think that you're so awesome and smart, and you just have no clue how the hell you got there in the first place. Even worse is when all of the sudden you have huge responsibilities and you don't have the slightest clue of what the hell are you doing. And this brought me to the realization that no one really knows what the hell they are doing. Which is quite scary in certain fields.

The best scientists and professionals have humility & self doubt. Fear of failure motivates upskilling, fact checking and improvement in general. Be wary of people who are full of themselves.

I didn't know this feeling had a name until now. I'm a graduate student and definitely feel this all the time!

I'm getting into grad school and was talking about this exact thing with fellow newbies... Sometimes I feel like my mentor has put WAY too much faith into how much I know and how smart I am... and dread the day where she figures that out :(

I never knew this was even a think yet I keep getting a similar feeling at my current duty section however it's due to the fact that I don't get any feed back from my section leads and they have me running point on a night shift. Normally I would be relaxed about it and not that worried but the duty section I am in is kinda high stakes.

you have a good voice Alex I think you would make a good singer

Two of my fave youtubers on my fave topics - Science and Mental Health!! :D

I think it affects so many people because it's a simple manifestation of anxiety. I've lived with a clinical degree of anxiety for a long time, and there's literally nothing in the DSM-esque categorisation of 'Imposter Syndrome' that isn't explained by anxiety. The irony of this kind of pathologisation, is that when people think "i've got Imposter Syndrome" it makes them even more introspective and nervous, and actually exacerbates the symptoms. They become a living definition of the term 'worried well'. QUESTION: Do you think modern 'indoors' lifestyles are more prone to inducing anxiety than historical, physical jobs? And do you think that women being more likely to have these 'indoors' jobs now, where they can't pour their nervous adrenaline into physical activity, could explain why more women report anxiety than men? In my experience, the benefit of counselling (CBT) comes through the counsellor just being someone who's not me, but kinda knows what i'm experiencing. All they have to do, is be an external frame of reference, to say when an anxiety/mood is justified or not, so that their patient can put their mind to rest, or put it to work on more productive things. QUESTION: Do you think that the stereotypically manly attitude of men 'bottling up' their fears minimises their anxiety, by suppression of positive feedback thought sequences? And do you think women are much more likely to talk about anxiety, and so are actually making each other more anxious, through peer affirmation and normalisation? I think the hangover of Freudian pseudoscience in Psychiatry still motivates professionals to seek some kind of deep, technical mumbo-jumbo jargon, to convince themselves that they're 'proper' professionals, beyond their very basic but important role. This, in itself, is an interesting psychological phenomenon. Personally, i don't care how many/few letters my counsellor claims, after her name - i feel like she saved my life, and that's what matters. QUESTION: What techniques of self-deception do you perceive Psychiatrists to use, when their patients don't get better, despite intense effort on their part? For example, when a Depression patient commits suicide. I can imagine what they might be, but i don't work in the profession, so i'd like to know what you'd say. What's it like, from the seat facing the door?

I love the blackcurrant ginseng and vanilla one... Buttermint is great too (Tastes as good as it smells!)

Another great series! Anyway, I recommend English Breakfast (or Black Oolong) steeped for 20 minutes with 2 grams of sugar.

Imposter mug! It says "He likes strong coffee" even if you're a girl and you're drinking tea! :P On a more serious note, yeah I guess I can relate to what you described in your video. I do agree that most of us, grad students, feel at some point that we're not as good as people think we are. What varies is how we react to such feelings. What helps me is trying to stay humble. Like it's ok not being able to know everything, just be aware of what you know and what you don't know. Accept that being successful is a mixture of rigor and hard work, but also luck and good circumstances. Accept that good science can be learning from what hasn't worked for the hundredth time and not just learning from that single, amazing, eureka experiment. Talking with your peers also helps since you then realize you're not alone feeling that way and that others appreciate you for what you are. A bit like what you did in that video! I guess it's not a bad attitude in science to have doubts about what you know and what you are doing if that makes you strive to dig deeper into your science. It's bad if it puts too much pressure on you and makes you depressed.

That coffee mug is an imposter: "Il aime son café fort" but it's actually a "fresh and fruity blackcurrant ginseng and vanilla tea".

I think having imposter syndrome is good for me. It reminds when I'm slacking of the perspective people have of me and pushes me to work harder to maintain that positive perspective they have.

As a first year biology PhD student, I go back and forth between "I'm so excited to be on this project!" to "I have no idea what I am doing.." at least twice a week.

Great video, Alex! I am curious to know if it is still considered imposter syndrome if it is characterized by 'perpetual' failure as opposed to success. If there's one thing grad school has taught me in the last three years, it is how to fail (ungracefully, I might add), over anything else (I am actually planning on doing a video about it later this week :D). The important part, I think, whether we have a hard time accepting our success or our failure, is to keep working and keep going... :)

I'm a senior in an undergrad dual degree program. My professors constantly praise my work and urge me to get involved in research and get into a great grad school, but I always feel like that's so lofty a goal for me. I'm just a dude trying to get by, how could I possibly hope to contribute back in such an important way? I wonder if I'm facing Imposter Syndrome myself.

What're your goals after school? aside from visiting Iceland.

Good to know the name; I know the feeling well.

I've been working at a hospital for several years now (as a maintenance guy) and I've seen many of the clinical techs advance to full fledged nurses and doctors over the years. And you're right, some of them do kinda seem uncomfortable with the actual authority they've totally earned. But I guess, with time, they'll settle in and start yelling at me, like the old ones. Heheheh! :)

Hi Alex, love your videos and I'm a subscriber. And I really don't subscribe to many people. Just that your so much fun to watch, so full of life, and so intelligent. Not trying to mess with your imposter syndrome lol. but my main concern watching you two, is that you're so animated and you're using such hot tea. Maybe you should have a table in front of you or maybe Ice tea might be better if you prefer doing it the way you are now. Just saying. Not judging or scolding. I'm a commercial pilot, my dad is also. I have had similar feelings about my abilities as you. People saying I was really good and not really feeling that I was. But now that I'm old and wise (lol). I can see when I actually started to believe what people were telling me. So maybe if one or two people where the only ones that were saying something, like that, like family. That would be one thing. But when many different people you don't know say the same thing.... Doesn't that give it some validity. At least it did to me. I'm really glad you started your videos back up.

Hey! Nice to hear a chat on psychology with Alex! Not so sure about needing to see a therapist for fraud syndrome, though . . . CBT always sounds a lot like NLP to me, and would not have strong, lasting effects on someone with a high IQ. The intelligent individual cannot "un-know" that the societal merit of their knowledge and ideas is always contingent on their listeners' approval. Social contract, collectivism and framing through available heuristics are to blame for self-deprecation and low confidence. Try giving Schopenhauer a read instead.

Is it a problem in a given context? We know people are not infallible. It seems to make sense if you consider it double checking yourself. One thing to consider if there is the perception that one is not worthy, for a human, with all of their idiosyncrasies, what is a reasonable criteria for worthiness? Is it important that you take something seriously enough to have striven for a length of time and try to do well enough that you can set a high standard?

Small suggestion: No hard walls or floors when recording the audio as it causes an annoying echo from the multipath bouncing the sound goes through. Drop cloths near the walls can help cut it out, as can directional mics for each speaker.

aaah i was wondering who you were, so you're not bite scized anymore. Hello Alex, nice to meet you.

Nice idea. I happen to drinking a beer not tea at the moment. I hope that's ok.

Is there a reverse of Imposter syndrome. I feel like I am good enough but no one notices accomplishments by not hiring me when I am qualified. In addition no one understands my personality.

People in the UK really HATE it when you leave the tea bag in the cup. They consider it to be extremely rude!

Is it correct to say that it is a case of severe over-humbleness and lack of confidence?

>:o eye opening

At the other end of the spectrum is Dunning-Kruger effect.

Akex!! Tea Coffee Why?

sysadmins tend to experience this at quite high levels as well (anecdotally from /r/sysadmin). however, they only admit this in anonymous online forums. to admit anything other than complete confidence and competence is generally unacceptable in this field

2:45 Let me guess that one girl was Laci Green

Are people who have impostor syndrome but eventually get labeled, what they were trying avoid upholding and cherishing as their own or as an expert on some certain filed , feel that they would no longer belong that humble group whenever they are elevated to certain position due to their skills or knowledge. Do they have the fear of being treated differently than they were before they had the skills or some sort of attractive attribute ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Ummm....Alex, red tea? milk tea? green tea?

So basically, imposter syndrome is a significant lack of self-confidence that has become a self-fulfilling prophecy, or is about to become one? Wow, and to find even a name for it...Well, I guess if there are so many people experiencing it, then it deserves a name.

maybe i'm in the wrong here, but it sounds linke you're promoting running to a therapist every time you feel a little self doubt. Isn't self doubt (in the right extent) a good thing ? where is the point at wich one should consider seeking mental health counseling? because in this video it sounds a little like "doubt yourself? see a doctor!"

I never knew it had a name 😅😅

The word is spelled impostor.

So what's the opposite syndrome? You know, where you expect praise for doing super simple mundane stuff? Of what about when you accept the praise and think, "Damn, right. I'm good"? I'm sure I suffer from one of them. ;)

This is a great idea for a series. Increasing awareness and self-understanding, reducing stigma for these these kinds of things is always good. Just knowing that something has a name and that there are people like me who have overcome it is so relieving.