Infantilization: A Gen Z Crisis 

A lot of people don't treat children like humans. Most treat them like pets. Tell them what to do, flaunt them in front of their friends, fawn over their cute innocence, and resent their budding independence.

As a former child: no, we do not treat children like humans.

Being both infantilized and parentified is a wild trip. Don’t do it, kiddos.

My mom was abusive and sheltered me at the same time. She wanted me to be her little doll forever, kinda like gypsy rose but nowhere near as extreme. I did not know how to drive, or fix food, do laundry, clean, or even have relationships, work, take care of myself. Nothing. She isolated me and never let me have friends or form crucial relationships or life skills. When I’d try to learn something she’d get so mad at me. Wouldn’t let me even get a job, no way. I’m 24 and she still pitches a fit when I try to get a job, often sabotaging it or threatening to hurt herself. When I moved out she threatened to k!ll herself and constantly begs me to move back in. She didn’t want me to grow up, and it has messed with my head as an adult so bad. My start line feels miles behind everyone else’s. I do feel infantile but not by choice, I was raised to never grow up so I can constantly be under my moms thumb. I think I’m not alone here and a lot of gen z have screwed up parents. It’s generational trauma that gets worse with every decade

Cartoons are often made for children but they’re still made by adults. As an adult I can watch a kid’s cartoon and appreciate how someone was able to tell a complete story in ~7 minutes while also making it funny and entertaining. That takes a lot of skill

I'm gonna go ahead and say, no, we don't treat children like humans.

I don't think not wanting to go work has to do with infantilization. Gen Z hates working bc we have work harder than people did 20-30 years ago for example. Like goods were cheaper, housing was cheaper, etc. Like anyone can be highly educated and be jobless. Life is getting harder to live and it more like you're existing than living.

I am 23 and 4'11. I will always be infantilized. Infantilized by my parents, my friends, my partners, coworkers, strangers. I'll always be too young, too innocent. This causes me a great deal of insecurity with my own body. I can't just get taller, I can't look older. I've been told that I look no more than 12 years old. I can't get jobs because I don't look physically able to do the job. I can't be taken seriously at the doctor because I look too young to have hip or spinal pain. All on top of that, I can weed out the creeps that hit on me because I look like a child. It's exhausting, its demeaning, and I know I won't be treated like an adult ever, because even little elderly people get infantilized. I won't ever be treated like a normal person my age.

my two cents: adulthood (should) have nothing to do with labor. adulthood to me is compassion, responsibility, emotional self-regulation and working on a secure attachment style. thassit

It is so incredibly frustrating that maturity is constantly equated with... Just going to work.

Here's the difference from someone who lived it. I was born in 1981 as kids starting around grade 3, we walked to school or the bus without parents. We would come home from school with our own key, let ourselves in, grab a snack and go play outside unsupervised with all the other kids until our parents got home and called us in for dinner. If mom needed buns for dinner she sent me to the store with money while she cooked. Then I became a mom, all the rules changed. God forbid you sent your kids outside to play while you clean the house, now you have to take them to the park and watch them the whole time. Kids aren't expected to work things out themselves because adults are always around to mediate. I tried to give my kids some of the freedom I had but I can totally see at 17 my daughter is mentally younger than I was at her age because society has kept them under constant supervision until they are old enough to get a job.

I’m so tired of infantilization. I’m almost in my mid 20s. My dad still says things like “when you grow older you’ll understand” or “You don’t get it cause you’re young, I know what’s best for you, just listen”. I’m tired of people around me perceive me as childish because I like cartoons and stuff animals. I just want to live my life! I like those stuff because they brought me that nostalgic feeling of peace that I rarely had during my childhood.

People have been describing me as mature for a long time, but in truth I was just going through a hellish time and had no motivation or energy to act like your typical child/teenager. It's sort of wild because my mental health has been getting better recently and I've caught myself acting more stereotypically childish and silly. And people around me see this and think I'm being out of character, give me confused looks and all of that. In short, I went through a big part of my life acting like an adult inside a child's body. And now, I feel like a child stuck inside an adult's body. Crazy stuff.

As a 31 physically disabled man restricted to a wheelchair I've experienced infantilization my entire life even from my extended family

I spent my entire childhood not being told what was going on and being left in the dark and now that I'm an adult I'm discovering just how much I don't understand or know how to do, because nobody ever prepared me for it, and when i have to ask for help people treat me like I'm infantalizing myself for apparently not magically gaining the mystical "adult knowledge" that I guess everyone else got as soon as they reached 18. Like no, you don't just "know" that, someone taught you, which is something I didn't get to experience. It really doesn't help that I also have adhd and depression, and some people think that me taking medication is somehow me trying not to grow up??? I literally need these meds to function because my brain doesn't make these chemicals. Becoming an Adult was never going to magically fix that. Ignoring it or pretending it can isn't going to fix it. It's especially frustrating when you're treated like a child and then are accused of "acting like a child" for not immediately having your entire life figured out at 18 by people over 40 who struggle with the exact same problems but instead of getting help they choose to ignore their problems and pretend they're perfect while just continuing to make themselves miserable. I think some of the older generations are bitter and jealous that their mental health was often swept under the rug due to stigma or lack of treatment options. They were told to just "toughen up" for decades of their life, never getting any help or relief, only to see kids and younger adults getting the care that they themselves were denied. But they still won't admit that they need help, because they "turned out just fine", and either can't or won't admit that their life could be better with treatment, because they see treatment as "the easy way." They spent years and years convincing themselves that they didn't need any help, that they were strong enough to get through it alone, because that's all they could do. And after so many years they develop a sort of pride around that, which causes them to see getting help as "weak".

I spoke to my dad a few months ago about how I was parented, and by the end of the conversation he asked me a question, "Have I failed you?" I couldn't answer him. All I could manage to do was cry. I know he tried so hard to be a great parent to his children. But I now have crippling anxiety, I can't go outside. I have serious difficulty talking to people which often makes them upset or confused, I don't do things unless explicitly asked to do them, have never had a job, and dropped out of high school after the first year because my parents had no clue how to help me to succeed. I had been failing every class for 4 years in a row and still getting pushed into the next grade. Eventually, I gave up and solely focused on the things I genuinely enjoyed doing to try and cope because at that point, I had begun to self-harm. I did the things that I knew how to do well, art. I started drawing obsessively during classes until I only succeeded in art and music. I could only focus on one educational subject (ex. Math, Science, English, History) at a time next to the ones I was actually good at. I would try to get the grades up in one class, and fail in three others. The grade in the one I had focused on last was abandoned. It dropped every single time. Nobody taught me how to manage these things and I was left behind as a result. The stress from trying to succeed was killing me. I was getting sick every month, my nose bled when I got up in the mornings, I was losing weight, I was getting severe headaches at the age of 16, I was even losing muscle mass. All the while my parents would say how disappointed they were in me for not applying myself, saying they knew I could do better. I gave up because no matter how hard I worked, I couldn't make straight A's anymore. When they constantly told me how I needed to try harder when I was doing my best, I had no choice but to forcefully lower the bar by being a failure. I wish my parents knew what they were doing. I wish my mom wasn't afraid to grow attached to me. I wish I was given the resources I needed to succeed in life. Unfortunately, I was never given these things. Only the bare minimum, food, shelter, clothing, and education. That question, "Have I failed you?" rings inside of my head as an echo, because I, in turn failed my parents' expectations due to their inexperience. I felt horrible, because despite my best efforts, I was never enough. Despite my parents' best efforts, they were never enough. We both failed. I simply gave up sooner. I can't tell you what I'll be doing in the future. I can't tell you where I'll end up. I can't say I'll be alive or dead. I won't know until I'm there, wherever "there" may be.

What I've noticed is how intertwined infantilization and consumerism is. It's really easy to allow things like Disney to fill in the void of expression of childlike wonder in a world of capitalism where you are constantly pushed to be more and more efficient. My hope as a parent is that my daughter is allowed to have her fill of being a child while being empowered to grow into what she wants to become.

About the "Do we treat children as humans" question: I worked at a daycare for a couple of years, and I find that many times adults forget just how much children understand. One of my favorite instances from work was when one of the 2 year-olds in the daycare was pretending to drive a car while explaining to me that he tied the spare tire to the car with a rope and a drill so that he won't lose it. I love this story because I find that it shows that while there are things children don't understand (like the fact that you don't tie a rope with a drill), they are really good at understanding the general context of things. It's truly amazing how much children understand about the world around them.

Children are treated as objects/animals. Im also autistic and i look much younger than i am. Ive always hated being treated as a child even when i was a child. I understood it was wrong. And now as im 28, im treated as 18 or younger. People think its okay to yell at, command, pity, manipulate, control, grab and hit children. This isnt right.

I’ve been treated like an adult while I was a kid because I was supremely depressed and therefore “mature”. Now I’m an adult in college and I’m infantilized because I’m a optimistic person. I’m sorry I’m trying to enjoy my life and I’m finally able to feel being happy. A little context I am autistic

It is hard to grow up when there is no space to grow... no house to buy, best jobs taken, etc.

The idea that adults consuming children's media is a form of self-infantalization is an interesting concept, because it means that we inherently see children's media as lesser--less serious, less important, less capable of conveying "truths." For me, this speaks volumes on whether we treat children like humans. The answer is absolutely not, when media directed at them is seen as lesser, just because it's directed at them. I do think it can be problematic to do nothing but consume children's media and like, play with toys as an adult, but anything is problematic if it's all you do. Is it inherently less valuable or more problematic to spend your free time watching Powerpuff Girls instead of Keeping up with the Kardashians? (No shade to anyone who watches the Kardashians, I'm just trying to make a point). What makes children's media less valuable than adult media? I think this is an important question to consider.

bad take. we are tired and find comfort in what we find comfort. doing meaningless work to then see nepo babies living carefree lives on ttok is so surreal - the only difference between us and them is literally the birth lottery. why should i aspire to be a cog in the machine of the sociiety i live in? FOR WHAT? and say you like your job (i do) but it doesn't pay enough - for me, all of it goes to rent and groceries!! we. are. TIRED.

Being "adult" is overrated and when you grow you understand that in fact no one has any clue of what they are really doing most of the time

"Do we treat children as humans?" From my own observation a lot of adults forget what it feels like to be a child. They think children are these empty minded animals that need to be told what to do (look at you american conservatives). They do things like bark orders and snatch toys and books from children because "im the adult I make the rules", but all it does it teach those kids to grow up into helpless adults who throw tantrums or worse totalitarian adults who terrorize others. "I think we underestimate what children are capable of" By the time my Elder was 4 years old he was basically responsible for his younger brother. Both parents were useless (father was physically and mentally a terror and mom was the helpless enabler) Sure mom and dad provided food and shelter but the punishment dealt was always unjust and there was little to no emotional comfort. So now he's in his 60s fighting against child abuse by starting with the simple truth that EVERY CHILD IS A HUMAN BEING and "Not a human 'doing'" as he says. Children inherently deserve respect and autonomy and careful guidance - not obtuse punishment and rule following. I point this out to highlight the reality that people who dehumanize children are probably also dehumanizing themselves. There are adults who need a time out, but instead project their dysregulation onto their children. I hate when adults say "xyz is for children" because it's a lie people tell themselves to justify the pain of not accepting yourself completely. It's a lie because... adults are the one's who write, edit, animate, direct, and produce children cartoons. Like... adults are the people who design Lego sets. Everyone BTS of Bluey is fucking adult. These types of entertainment are not mutually exclusive.

I’m glad you brought it back around to the dehumanization of children, because that’s what underlies the entire cultural process of infantilization in the first place, and what gives infantilization its meanings in culture. The oppression of children one of the most overlooked issues in U.S. society. My dad always said you can learn a lot about a culture by how it treats it’s children. And we as kids are forced to learn a certain way, forced to perform to certain expectations, forced to suppress and ignore our natural inclinations and needs, and given no platform for autonomy in the world that controls us. So it’s no wonder many of us seek to comfort our inner child when we are grown. This is why children and teens are so effective as activists, because by the time we grow up the determination is starved out of us, and we are tired and burned out. We need youth liberation for effective progress.

That TikTok is such a mood, though lol Obviously it’s just a joke, but everything she described really was the early 00’s chick flick fantasy I saw over and over again as a child. It made being a teenager or adult look so glamorous and desirable. But now I’m mostly concerned with not getting sick so I don’t have to worry about medical bills and preparing to spend $300 on a new windshield for my car because of hail. There is definitely a part of my lizard brain asking “where are my massages and shopping trips and glamorous outfits?” when I have bad mental health days because the idea is so escapist and was so ingrained in the media from my childhood. Escapism is rarely truly representative of what I actually want. Not having things to do besides just shop would drive me crazy. But, in my worst moments of anxiety and overthinking, the idea of mindless fun sounds like a miracle.

i feel kind of annoyed at the whole "everybody is infantilizing themselves now!! and also that is awful and these people are bad for that!!" shtick for multiple reasons. i feel like not only it's often directed at ppl literally just having fun and having hobbies and expressing themselves and generally just being actual persons instead of some hyper-restrictive pointless bland ideal of how an "actual adult should be", but also it's just inherently aggressive towards folks with childhood trauma, many adhd/autistic folks and ppl who just had their childhood marred for whatever other reason. many adhd/autism traits are seen as childish (like sensory issues or hyper/understimulation or executive dysfunction or stimming or even just fucking. being visibly happy abt something), finding comfort in anything is seen as childish, MANY hobbies are/can be seen as childish, even grieving the years you have lost to mental illness or to traumas caused by growing up with undiagnozed neurodivergency can be seen as childish bc "well life is just unfair, get over it".

When people reject infantilisation by talking about romance and sex they’re indirectly infantilising people who don’t feel those things. I’m so sick of this.

I especially hate the infantilization of neurodivergent people, its perfectly fine to consume/enjoy media for kids but its different to treating eachother like silly little kids. Im not talking about age regression, but ive noticed it and it annoys me. I feel disconnected to alot of the modern autistic/adhd communities around me because of it

I feel that another big problem about infantilization is that people treat teens like children, adults keep saying that teens are kids, that they're little children and most teens DO believe that they're little kids!!! They're NOT kids, they're NOT adults, they're teens!!! Why do people want to ignore the fact that teenagers exist? Treating someone as a kid and all of a sudden treating them as adults without any smooth transition is horrible, it doesn't give the person any time to addapt and gradually change from kids to adults. They need guidance of course, but they can handle more responsibilities, they start having different interests, they have their sexual awakening (and no people, just recognizing that a 15 year old can feel any sexual stuff isn't pdphilia) and they start to become adults and we NEED to recognize that! Because by treating them as little kids only make them easy prey for any sicko who's into teens, they need to be treated with more respect and as they grow they need to be treated more and more adult-like and not, treating them as adults doesn't mean looking at them in a sexual way (idk why most people on the internet inmediately think of sex when this subject is brought up), give them more responsibilities and trusting them a bit more, they will make mistakes but it's normal, i feel that people that treat teens as kids are preventing them from making mistakes and learning how to be functional adults... I was a victim of that, i was overprotected by my parents and also treated as a kid when i was a teenager, i wanted to be taken seriously but no adult would ever take me seriously because all of them treated me as a kid and not recognize i was a teen... That led me to become victim of a predator... This guy was in his 20's (i was 14 at that time) and actually treated me as an equal, that made me feel like an actual teen, almost like an adult and of course he used the "you're too mature for your age" bullsh*t, i was fascinated by the fact that someone was treating me as a teen and well... This happened back in 2009, he sexually abused me and asked me to be his girlfriend afterwards, i said yes because back then if anyone knew what he did to me or if he said anything of what happened, I would be sl+tshamed and treated as if i had let it happen... To everyone i was just a child but if anything sexual happened then i could be judged as if i was an adult doing a bad thing. I grew up and when i was 19 i dumped this creep and it took YEARS for me to realize i was abused and infantilized. It felt horrible... That's why i'm sooo against of people treating teens as kids, they may look even younger and yes, they are young but they're NOT kids!!! Treating them as such makes them easy prey! And also, as someone who has being infantilized her whole life, now i'm 28 and don't know how to do ANY BASIC ADULT ACTIVITY, idk how to use the washing machine, idk how to pay taxes, idk how the paying for services work and all of a sudden people are expecting me to act like a fully grown woman... When people are infantilized especially since they're teens, they grow to become adults with a lot of problems, some of them grow up and become addicts, some others (like me) don't know how to "adult" properly and we have to learn from scratch, some others try to fit in and fail miserably affecting their mental health and they end up being really hard on themselves and some others just want to still be treated as children and become "useless". It's not just a Gen Z crisis... Some of us late Millennials have suffered from this. This really needs to stop.

This really wasn't about the infantilization of gen z, just broadly rambling about infantilization with no direction.

Why are cartoons and video games frowned upon for adults? Life is hard, so what’s wrong with checking out after college or work with a game or comforting show? I hate that adults are expected to be serious all the time and watch paint dry for fun. Let people enjoy things.

I’m ace and when I tell people they have a tendency to treat me differently. Like I’m “too innocent” to understand dirty jokes or have conversations regarding sex. When I spoke up about being pro choice my classmates were shocked because “well it shouldn’t effect you right?” As If ace people were immune from being r***d. (I’m sex repulsed and voluntarily celibate but plenty of ace people aren’t). I’m a grown woman. I shouldn’t be treated differently because of my orientation.

it's not that us women CAN'T do the 40 hour work week, it's that we don't want to. And we're leaning into the century old sexism as a joke.

I can only really speak for myself but I feel like a lot of us are in a place where we don’t really know what we are supposed to do to succeed. Everything feels so incredibly complicated and overwhelming. I want to put the work in to being successful but I feel like no matter how hard I work or try, I’m just kinda stuck.

Children love me because I don’t treat them like children. I treat them like gonna-be adults. I’m not the same person as I am with adults, but I don’t coddle them or baby-talk them. I just speak with them. They adore me because of this

Did anyone else find the zoom meeting discussion (23:40)to be dismissive/infantilizing within itself towards consuming “childish” media (also I did not miss the fact that they mainly discussed animation during this portion)? Why is it that something like powerpuff girls, an animated show aimed toward kids, is assumed to lack craftsmanship and worth of watching within itself just because it isn’t “deep” or it's "easy media" (a term that wasn't really defined, along with "childish media" so I am left to assume what they encompass). Some people, particularly those interested in the medium OF the media they consume, just enjoy that type of thing (not just because they are nurturing their inner child or need comfort)- sometimes it’s even their job, the animation industry is mostly run by adults after all. I think it was a bit restrictive to assume people consume media for a singular purpose, I guess… Sometimes what you get from shows is what you put into it. They become important to us because in watching and experiencing, we bring in a part of ourselves. It was just strange to hear all this analysis and deep dive into WHY we infantilize/pointing it out in our society only for the conclusion section to put personal actions and preferences into that category, diminishing their worth into “comfort” and “nurturing your inner child”, particularly when liking “childish” things like “cartoons” is a trait associated with the neurodivergent community. Idk, the ending section just felt like outsiders looking in, the way things like "I can excuse x, because y" and "Yeah consume media for the sake of comfort, but be careful, don't do it too much!" were said made me question who that discussion was aimed at. The people infantilizing themselves on purpose? Or the ones you've deemed to be participating in infantilization because their interest lay outside the cultural norm? Also the fact that this video made me type out a whole mini essay means it's doing its job! Hell yeah, I love things that spark conversation.

As someone who advocates for adults to enjoy "childish" things and did a masters project and research on it: a lot of it stems from trauma, from growing up too fast. I was sent off to a boarding school at age 12 for 5 years, then, brough back home and had to act as a 3rd parent, since my dad was hard at work most of the week. I had to do it until I was 21. Only after I moved out I found the safe space to be a "child". I can rewatch the same cartoon over and over, I collect dolls, especially the ones that were given away due to me being "grown up" at 12 (!!!). I enjoy being childish and bright. None of the girls in my boarding school had a chance at childhood. You dont stay a child in environments like that. You physically are one but not mentally. Same with a lot of 1st born daughers of a large family. I think there is a fine line between childhood fetishism and truly healing your inner child

I’m a 22 year old woman. I feel like I have been both infantilized by the people around me and infantilizing myself subconsciously. This video has been very insightful.

It is extremly damaging to a whole creative industry and ironically infantlaizing a large demographic of people to keep up this mentality that cartoons are just for children. You can tell extremely mature, gripping , and gut-wrenching narratives with animated media ( ie. Presepolis, Unicorn wars, Brirdboy: and the forgotten children to name a few).

I’m a 35 year old woman on the autism spectrum, and it’s really embarrassing for my parents to infantilize me in public. Like yeah, I have my eccentric quirks, but that’s not a good reason to treat me like that. I’m actually capable of a lot more than I look. My autism doesn’t define me, I define myself. Take a moment to let that sink in.

I am noting what I’ve observed about how society and even parents treat children. For context, my parents brought me with to an adult party. The adults hosting the party had a 5 and 6 year old. Other adults attended the party and also brought their children. Most of the kids were around the age range of 4-7, along with a 9, 10, and 12 year-old. I, a teen at the time, played with them all and acted as the older sibling to the kids during the party. I have been doing my own research on parenting styles and their impact, so I treated the kids seriously and with respect. Eventually a few minor conflicts came up: one being about why we couldn’t play Among Us irl (the answer being the other kids did not have the attention span and it would be challenging for the younger kids to follow the rules for). I had a one-on-one conversation with one of the 5 year-olds and I was taken a back by the depth he was able to understand the topic, it was far more than I expected. We talked about child brain development and he asked further questions with great interest. The kid understood and we played a simpler game. I realized from that conversation and during play how capable these kids were. Yet when adults came by they babied the kids with infantalizing remarks and with ridiculous commands. The parents lacked patience in helping the kids understand why the rules are there on top of the rules themselves being vague (also the adults were hypocritical so that did not help the kids understand any better). The parents were more immature than the youngest of the kids were during minor conflicts. I should’ve said something but I was in no mood to get in trouble for ‘talking back’. In one incident, a kid accidentally knocked one of the youngest kids with a toy. Which was a mess because one of the adults came in and had a huge reaction despiste the situation being rather minor. Anyway, the kid who was hit I helped calm down and he cuddled up with me for the rest of the party (for further context, we were instructed to only play in that room and the same adult put on a movie after all of that). When I had to go home, the kid started crying because he grew attached to me. He was distressed by the idea of me leaving. I did my best to comfort him and reassure him we’ll meet again while the adults, most being parents, were laughing at him. To them his distress wasn’t real and just a show. The kid and I were really uncomfortable. The adults, including my parents, then proceeded to compliment me on my ability to get along with the kids and how mature I was. The adults acted like I performed magic. Being an effective caregiver for children is not magic. It is hard work. I did some research on how to best communicate with children and take care of them emotionally. That is something I know the other parents and adults have not done. In conclusion, children are more often than not treated like pets instead of people. Children are constantly dismissed by adults who do not care to understand them and do not bother effectively teaching them about the world. I believe all these problems tie back to an overlooked expectation of parenthood: having a child is not the same as raising one.

Well, I tried to "adult" so hard that I crashed at 36 and never had the desire to join the rat race again. I got a late diagnosis of autism and everything made suddenly sense. For me, being an adult is precisely STOP to do things to please others in detriment of my own health and safety. I took care of my executive disfunction by taking a curator to deal with my bills and payment, so nothing is ever overdue again. Admitting your own shortcomings is also acting mature. I may look very carefree and live with very little responsibilities , but it was all carefully curated by myself out of respect for what I can and can't do. So called "adults" are all suffering from a giant case of Stockholm syndrome, exhausting themselves and pretending to like it. And they lie to kids, so kids hurry up to grow up, only to find there is nothing great to gain from it , only work they hate, chores that never ends and misery. Their best years are behind them and they wasted them wanting to be adults fast. No wonder nostalgia is trending, it's just the first stage of awakening... Opting out is the most brave thing to do. Work, yes, but don't let anyone overwork you. Never work a job you hate. Life is short, don't forget to enjoy it.

i remember starkly walking into my local womens center and outside a woman was like lecturing her kid and she litterally said 'your a child, you dont have any rights !' bro the kid was balling too. idk the circumstances but i think thats a really telling thing to say regardless. And in public too

3:30 Everyone needs to work hard, but the work shouldn't be soul-crushing. Whenever I hear of work schedules, I'm reminded of early colonization of Hawai'i. The indigenous Hawai'ians were up before dawn and done with all their work by 11 AM and were out surfing by noon. The European/American settlers saw them as "lazy" because they only worked "half" the day the colonizers did. When in reality they just had a bit of an offset schedule. If you wake up at ~4AM, and start work either instantly or within about 30 minutes, and are done by 11, that's 7 hours of wake time between getting up and being done with work. Juxtaposed with the common 9-11 hours, it's strange to see how this all unfolded and the European settlers made the Hawai'ians conform to their ideas of what a normal "work day" was supposed to look like, instead of just having tasks done as the island people did them.

25:01 "Challenge yourself." Ugh. I agree with a lot of the things you said in this video, but also... toxic hustle culture and the exploitation of the working class. We are an overworked, underpaid group in search of escapism, using utopia as the both the dream of a better life and the fuel for creating a better life, and rest IS productive. Why should I "challenge myself" during my rest? I do think that there are lots of benefits to watching challenging and interesting media, but it also okay for rest to just be rest, it doesn't have to be intellectually productive. Rest isn't about production, and if you have a mentally taxing job, sometimes you just need a break to watch something easy before you can pursue your more intellectually stimulating side-interests. But... joy isn't infantilizing. Rest isn't infantilizing. It is 100% fine for a person to enjoy video games or shows for children. It is 100% okay for a person to do things that bring them peace, even if they aren't things made for adults.

Elder Gen Xer here, I think play itself is human. One can be childlike without being childish. I have a disability, and accepting that means unlearning some unhelpful habits I had picked up because others were scared to let me fail and wanted to protect my feelings. Being an adult shouldn't mean you forget to play, be silly, or do 'useless' things. Young people today deserve credit for having to grow up with their life on social media!

The question of "do we treat children as humans" is one that I never really see people bring up. I never forgot how frustrating it was for me to be treated as a borderline helpless animal as a child so as I've gotten older I've made a conscious effort to try and actually talk to kids on their level. As a teenager I worked at a horse riding stables for a summer, and the other employees hated dealing with the group of older kids (10-11 year olds) because they felt like they were less cooperative and too snippy, but they never gave me trouble because I was never condescending to them. I just talked to them like they were people and they were willing to cooperate way more just from me being more understanding and not talking down to them. They didn't hate riding horses or doing activities they hated being treated like they were at a daycare.

As a mother of a Gen Z, I would say they’re the most mature person I’ve encountered. I also have a millennial. My youngest is more mature than my millennial. Both aren’t that much different technically, as in growing up in the technology and digital day but what I’ve noticed is Gen Z are more aware of the world problems and it’s diversity, and are more compassionate and empathetic. It’s just a shame the economy is messed up globally. I find my Gen Z advice is sound, rational and they have helped me out with my problems, in fact we help each other out. They can handle problems themselves with immense maturity and they are my go to person for solid advice. So I would say they have helped me out the most than any other. Why people treat them like they are babies I’ve no idea!

this is an endlessly fascinating topic! I'm 21 and I'm noticing more and more that my friends refer to themselves as “teens” or “just a girl”, etc. I think the whole pandemic situation (lockdown, online school and whatnot) contributed to this idea that we're somehow stuck in time or that we are mentally younger than our actual age. A lot of my friends refuse to think about the future, which is their own problem. However, they also refuse to read the news or study history or engage in politics - which is ultimately a problem that affects everyone. Thank you for such an insightful video

I'm an asexual person with autism and people who know this sometimes treat me like I'm the purest, most innocent creature to grace the planet. They think my interest in animation is cool, until I tell them I like South Park or Futurama. Then they say how they'd never expect that from me. When I make (or sometimes just understand) sex jokes they're surprised every time. And don't get me started on how they react to my love of horror in general. However, they also act like the fact I draw cartoons is the cutest thing ever, even when I weave adult themes into them. Not just that, but my parents don't see me as an adult either. Every time I try to help with housework, pay for something, or just be generally independent they say say, "Don't worry, we do it ourselves!" I'm 24 years old and I'm still treated like a child. I want to help, I want to be independent, I want to *feel* like an adult. It's infuriating and exhausting.

In my country we have a proverb that says 'children and fish have no voice'. I think it clearly shows how society percives children

i'm in my early twenties but have always felt behind in terms of my mental age, and while this always fails me when I try to do "adult" things (i.e college, socializing with other adults, working etc) it gave me an insight on how weirdly and, dare I say, inhumanely adults treat people who don't act like them, because i often get infantilized. i see how frustrated kids get when their needs aren't met because they "can't communicate"... aka, they don't communicate the way an adult expects them to, so they're chastised for crying or for shutting down. like, adults LOVE telling kids they're doing things wrong and then never explaining why. do the adults even know why it's wrong? what rules are we even following?

As someone who is 30 but looks 12-14ish (childhood cancer treatment messed up puberty growth), I absolutely have been infantilized my whole life, even by my family. I've had my ID taken to be checked by a manager multiple times, I've been ignored/treated rudely by staff or gotten "why is this kid here looks". If stand up for myself for whatever reason, people look at me like I'm some precocious kid that is being a nuisance. It drives me insane because I can't even go grocery shopping without some weird interaction happening. I remember when I was a kid and looked forward to being taken seriously as an adult...which never happened. So yeah, treat kids and anyone who seems young with basic respect please.

due to circumstances beyond my control, i’ve always been labeled as “mature”. to top it all off, i’m the eldest daughter of three. to top that all off, i grew up as a black girl in texas. as a child, i had no choice but to grow up a lot faster than my peers and be “grown”. i recently just turned 20, and have been struggling conceptualizing the idea of “adulthood”. i feel like i’ve always been an adult, but now i’m actually an adult… like fr fr. i’m stuck between ‘allowing myself to give pieces of my childhood back to my younger self, parts that were robbed from her’ and ‘buckling down and tryna get my shit in order’. i wouldn’t say i infantilize myself, but i do notice whenever real life hits, i revert back childlike ways of coping. ex; whenever i get frustrated, i run straight to my partner. it’s difficult tryna navigate the transitory period between adolescence and adulthood, all while not having the best coping mechanisms. i don’t infantilize myself to the extremity’s of which you stated at the end, but i am trying to allow myself some space to heal some really wounded parts of my being. i say that to say i throughly enjoyed this video, and i truly appreciate the perspective. looking forward to the rest of the series!

This entire topic reminds me of how people on twitter use the label of "minor" as a way the abdicate all responsibility, even for teens as old as 17-18. (Even once saw someone unironically refer to themselves as a 20 years old minor.)

I didn’t realize how much I needed this video. So I have ADHD. For months I’ve been falling into a pit just trying to convince myself I’m a human because no one treats me like I’m a human on their level. My friends treat me like I’m incapable of being responsible, men don’t look at me like an option. I’m a person, I’m person with struggles, with responsibility. I live despite hating doing stupid shit society forces me to. I feed my pet regularly without help. I pay for my own gas. But I’m a child because I don’t want to be miserable. I don’t want to be serious when I don’t have to be. I’m a child because I refuse to be dull, because I dare enjoy stuff that isn’t ‘typically mature’ When I do stupid shit I do it with the consequences in mind. I’ve decided the result out ways the consequences, I don’t just do stupid shit with no regard. I do stupid shit while being constantly aware of my surroundings to avoid hurting people in the process to the best of my ability and if I do bother someone I will TAKE RESPONSIBILITY for my actions and APOLOGIZE like a level headed adult. It’s literally a stereotype that men do stupid shit constantly but when I do it suddenly I lose the respect of the people around me. It’s so frustrating. IM A PERSON!!!! I’m not a pet, I’m not a toddler, IM A PERSON.

As someone with mental illness I feel infantilized a lot because I don't have a job but I cook, self regulate, take care of the house, volunteer, and take care of my own body and appointments and such. I pretty much have a life besides financially. My family has always infantilized me and this became learned helplessness. It is hard to not define myself as a child as someone who can't work. But I do the best I can do. And that's all anyone can ask

Here's one time I witnessed blantant self-infantalization: One time at work, a customer (a white woman) freaked out about her order not being done correctly and went into a whole screaming litany that used VERY liberal use of the N-word against a black co-worker. After storming out, she came back in after a couple of minutes and "apologized" by insisting she was mentally ill. After she left the second time, I mentioned to another co-worker, "So... she would rather people think she's just crazy than racist...?"

To me it’s weird how our society views playing video games and watching cartoons as “nurturing your inner child” I do think a lot of times people go to those things with the intention of nurturing their inner child or basically fully aware that those things aren’t for adults but the problem is that I don’t think that’s necessarily the purpose of those things. video games can be incredibly complex and have deep lessons for all ages, even if it’s a game like idk Pokémon. we label things either for children or for adults when in reality lots of those things are for both. Also someone mentioned in the comments how media labeled for kids is made by adults and that also shows how we can watch cartoons as adults and enjoy as much or even more without having to do it as a “this is for my inner child”

Honestly one of the reasons it's hard for me to be interested in A N Y T H I N G is because of the notion that "having childish hobbies is a bad thing because you're an adult and only should like adult things". I don't really watch anything or play any games at all, or really do anything because I'm so burnt out and have internalized that I shouldn't be doing things that make me happy or help me relax, because if I'm not productive all the time it's a bad thing, because adults are supposed to work a lot. I've been trying to unlearn that behavior, but I still spend hours every day just idling if I'm not being productive and hoping the burnout goes away on its own.

As someone who's into animation, one piece of criticism I have for this video essay is that partaking in hobbies mainly aimed at kids is not inherently childish. Rather, it's about how you engage with those things. A kid might just see haha funny and pretty and subconsciously internalize messages, teens might be hyperfixated on the romance, among other themes, and adults inherently watching something as "junk food media" is a form of self-care in moderation. Also, a lot of children's media has complex themes that only older audiences can pick up on (which as a reply pointed out, means that it ISN'T ALWAYS junk food). Thinking critically about the media we consume, even about what we think is flawless is definitely what I would consider a form of maturity. Also, animation is art, and anyone can appreciate beautiful art. I can't draw at all, but as a writer, I'm inspired by and learn a lot from the storytelling both written and visual in animated TV and film. But also anyone can appreciate beauty. So I don't completely agree with the rationale in this video regarding engaging with "kiddish" hobbies, or at least I don't think it was explained all that well. But other than that, this video essay has been phenomenal.

I feel like our internalized infantilization is a byproduct of generations before us infantilizing us. Telling us we don't know what we're doing and diminishing our efforts when we try to figure things out and be independent. I also think it's a byproduct of the state of our current world. How our economic systems are crashing, inflation is rising, we survived a pandemic, there's more people being boldly hateful, there's a war. Our current Zeitgeist is depressing. So we kinda just accepted it and went, "yeah we're not ready. We are just kids, we were doing our best to be grownups so why be something we're not?" with this widespread desire to escape to a simpler time when things made sense. Childhood. (I haven't finished the video yet but this was my thoughts on it. I'll probably edit or something after I finish it.)

I infantilize myself on reflex, it's actually where a lot of my depression and anxiety come from. I am autistic, but I was diagnosed in my teens. I was often called an "old soul" by my family and teachers, but I was also told I needed to grow up and be more mature. I was more mature then other kids but also at the same time not mature enough. Not successful enough. I was never allowed to be a child, but not properly shown how to be an adult. As someone with autism it's difficult for me to process information and learn, though if approached properly I can surpass others with ease. I need my hand held, to be shown by someone else first and then attempt it on my own. I often watch videos of someone doing something first. But if I do it right, I can manage fine. After I was diagnosed people changed, I wasn't allowed to do anything by myself because I couldn't learn their way and I got more and more behind. I couldn't drive, I didn't even have a learners permit. Nobody let me get one. I didn't know how to do my taxes, I didn't know how to talk to strangers, I didn't even know how to set up a doctors appointment, and I wasn't allowed to hang out after school or go places on the weekend without the supervision of my mom or my best friend. I moved out right out of highschool right before I turned 19. I couldn't take the smothering anymore. I met a guy I liked and did what other people my age were doing. My family went ballistic. We even got doxxed and had to file a police report against my mom because she was claiming I had been kidnapped and trying to get other people involved to bring me home. Two years later, when shit calmed down, I married him. My family didn't mind as much this time, but my friends went crazy. Everyone was trying to talk me out of it because I was "too young to make decisions like that" One friend even told me to my face she didn't trust me to make "adult" decisions. I'm 24 now and I've been married four years now, happily. I can do our taxes, I can make doctors appointments, and I'm learning to drive an old beetle that we own. But I still find myself treating myself this way, beating myself up constantly for "faking" being an adult. I hold myself to the same standards others still try to hold me to and it breaks me. I'm trying to break out of it, the more I learn the more it helps, but nothing will change how people treat me for being an autistic girl. Nothing will change the fact that few will hire me and the ones that do fire me for my autism. And if I can't work, I'm not worthy of being treated as a human.

23:05 I think an important part is how we label or characterise these things. Maybe if we didn’t designate these as “kid things” then we wouldn’t infantilise ourselves doing them.

I think it's the other way around - we're so tired, burnt-out and value-less as adults, we seek infantile things to try to regain the false glamour of "no responsibilities"

As a full grown adult, I've been told I'm childish many times, mostly because I'm sensitive and and don't work well under too much pressure. Last time a coworker told me I was childish for not taking verbal abuse from our boss, I just snapped and told her that the abiliy to endure mistreat and exploitation does not make her mature... But still, sometimes I think she might have a point. PD: being 5,0 ft AFAB doesn't help either. I don't know if it's necessarily true, but I often feel that I'd be taken more seriously if I could just turn into a 6 ft man

Literally, plankton's speech to spongebob. A matter of fact that entire movie is a reminder that once you become an adult you have to take accountability for your own actions, just like spongebob in the movie he even didn't mind dying if it meant he got to try his hardest. That's life. We endure Paths we don't enjoy taking in order to achieve goals we want to reach. It's beautiful storytelling of how to be an adult. I will never forget that movie

I remember the first time I was called "Sir" by an adult. It was mind-blowing. Too bad the person calling me that was an ABA therapist who was just trying to get into my head.

I told some people I was asexual (cause Pride March) and they basically would ask questions and make comments as if I were a child (I'm 25). When I explained stuff about romantic attraction, they were like "awww, so innocent and pure" and hugged me even though I didn't know them and hated being touched by strangers. Apparently, what distinguishes adults from children is sexual attraction and having seggs. Smh

I think I infantilize myself partially to help cope with the fact that the way that our world works was very intentionally designed to keep us poor, mad, and miserable. Trying to live even a slightly okay life within it is next to impossible, even if you "put in the hard work". So I'd rather just float by having a decent-ish time for as long as I can and trade in my hand when it's time.

Millennials think that 19 years old is a kid. Bro, I’m about to be 20. I’m about to be in the workforce.

Animated media and games shouldn’t be thought of as infantilizing. As a storyteller, I am always engaging with with these things. It isn’t childish or nostalgia seeking for me to do so. I want to write, draw and create my own works. I could go beyond this and try and peace together every aspect of this, but other comments have already hit the nail on the head when it comes to that point specifically.

As a out of touch 38 year old Buddhist weirdo I am so grateful for this content, I am so pleased you have taken the time to be a foil for me to understand a much broader perspective and understanding on how the younger generation deals with mental health and issues of magnetized groups .

"Treating children as humans" - It wouldn't be fair to ask a 4 year old to file income taxes, or take on the breadwinner role for a disabled parent. But neither is it fair to tell the 16 year old that he should not take that trade apprenticeship because we had higher hopes. Most of our life is lived in between the extremes where it's not as obvious where the line between help/protection and infantilization is. And that line isn't in the same place for every individual, they all mature at different rates. There should be an escalating scale of earned responsibility and privilege, not some cliff of adulthood that we shove unprepared teens off of.

I usually talk to my parents about how I want a job so I can start saving for a house (I’m 14) and I always ask for tips. My dad often gives me great advice and I appreciate it, but my mom constantly tells me that if I want to know how it feels to move out, I can start paying the bills for our house. I hate it because my mom still treats me like a child even though I’m in high school already and unlike her, I want to achieve things and be successful in life.

Well "laying flat," isn't refusing to work at all, its refusing to put in the extreme effort that companies and society pressures them to put just prove their productivity and dedication for the betterment of society. Instead "laying flat," means not putting in extreme effort, but still putting in effort, to a degree that just allows them to maintain their livelihood.

17 child,18 grown adult... such a idiot way to think

Damn the comments about infantilizing autistic people really hits home. Even the people who otherwise treat me as a normal human being will still be surprised sometimes when I get a sex joke or when I'm open to smoking with them. Really makes me think no one sees me as an actual adult person

That's interesting! I do identify as a childlike adult. It was a decision that I made when I was 8 years old because the version of being adult that was presented to me seemed so f**ed up. And one of the aspects of this was the loss of agency that adults were showing me. Everything they did they "had to do it". And everytime I pointed something out that I found not good about the world or society they said that they can't do anything about it or do anything differently, they don't have a choice and what they do doesn't matter etc. They said my believe in a better world and in love was childish as was me being exited about little things. My values were naive, i was over sensitive etc. I knew already that my stuffed animal friends weren't real but cuddling and talking with them helped me to cope with the stress and emotions of that day and i found that much more healthy than drinking beer and smoking. Even things like being open to people instead of immediately judging them were depicted as something that innocent little children do, the adults somehow can't help themselves (again deny their agency) So, I decided to not "grow up" to always remain a child and I did in a way while still learning, maturing and growing and on the way finding good reason for many of the things (and also learning the psychological or political reasons for the existence of many adult beliefs) but of course also learning that some "adult things" of course do make sense. The most recent discussion I had about this was about my choice of clothes and that it is childish to want to wear what I like (or to like colors at all) and I have to accept that I have to dress "appropriate". I said I understand that for certain occasions there are dresscodes or a way of dressing appropriately for that occasion, that make very much sense, like work or people in certain roles or special occasions, but in everyday life I want to wear what gives me joy. She said then it's my fault if I'm not being taken seriously. Later that day I was still so angry that I cried. Not because I'm weak but because I know that crying is a very healthy response of my body and psyche to regulate strong emotions and after crying I felt better and even stronger in my values and ideals. So in conclusion, I really saw it the opposite way. Remaining like a child was a way of me not giving up my agency, my ideals and values, the connection to my emotions and my hope for a better world.

agree on the autism infantilisation stuff, i'm 21 living at home with my parents and it's so confusing... it's just all about what's convenient for everyone else essentially.

As someone who's gen Z but also has worked with children for over 3 years now: it's so weird and almost scary how kids are often treated as little animals, either rewarded or abused for their actions, with so little agency over their lives. Instead of doing things for them and then punishing them for not doing things we want them to do we should really try and give them as much space and support we can to help them be independent and take care of themselves. Maybe then being an adult won't seem so scary once they've grown.

Re: nostalgia and cartoons. As an amateur artist, I come back to shows that I was exposed to (but because of my Christian background didn’t get to enjoy) to experience them as entertainment, but also to re-examine them as art with my new experience. I think there is a side of self-infantilisation that is self-examination, coming back to things with a new perspective. That doesn’t change the fact that self-infantilisation can be paralyzing, but it doesn’t have to be.

oh dear it appears i have been infantilising myself since puberty... i struggle w anxiety and im pretty averse to making decisions and it's kind of leeched into my personality to the point where i feel like i have no authority or autonomy bc i'm so used to letting others decide things. Walking the line between "nurturing the inner child" by revisiting activities/shows i enjoyed when i was younger, and just being an idiot baby with no real thoughts. I was praised for being mature for my age when i was a kid and now im an adult i feel like a toddler at an office desk with no idea whats going on. & i wanna cry and throw up

''growing up'' means getting a 9-5 job, not being a fully formed human. Growing up means having children only to send them off to school where the state raises them while you dont because you're too busy working and commuting.

From a young age, I grappled with an advanced maturity, feeling unseen and unheard for who I truly was. The desire for independence was stifled, and despite yearning for work and financial autonomy, doors remained closed. So eventually I gave up. Moving to a more inclusive community allowed me to embrace my true identity as a trans woman, yet this journey through self-discovery has been emotionally turbulent. Presently, I find comfort in therapy, a sanctuary supported by my remarkable partner-a fellow non-neurotypical soul-whose playful, childlike nature, as well as being acutely aware of the atrocities of the world, complements my own experience. As my 19th birthday approaches, the struggle between adulthood and regression weighs heavily on me. Rehabilitation seems imperative as I navigate the complexities of my emotions, leaning on my partner, who serves as both my rock and a companion in the playful realm, for solace and guidance.

I've been acting and thinking childish as a personal trait for a long time now, which is to say I probably never grew out of school even though I'm about to finish Uni. I'm a 24 year old man, I even still look like a teen, and I actually take some sort of pride in being this way, while also deeply aware of the issues that come with living like a child already into adulthood can bring. I love being the possitve happy go lucky guy, always laughing and smiling, always bringing the energy up when the group feels low. My natural skills are all social stuff like bringing the music and singing to the party, preparing the fire for the camping trip, finding the humor in all things, and people love me for it. I like to think that we shouldn't ever loose touch with that inner child, and I see people who are disconnected from theirs and live miserable monochrome existences and I feel sad for them. I connect with children like no other I know, treat them as equals and take them seriously, while others see them as annoying and alien (good to see you're tackling that in a future video). I try to show people the good in life and bring the magic and wonder when everyone's talking statistics, logic, probabilities, burocracy, etc. But on the other side of the coin, yeah, I'm a manchild, straight up, and people notice too and sometimes treat me as such. No one ever taught me how to live life as an adult, how to survive in this new digital age. I live day by day reactively, just waiting for stuff to happen and only looking for the next fun thing to do with friends. Friends that are slowly but surely drifting into more mature and adult-like lives, with all the boredom and dullness this brings with it (insert comment about the current late stage system we all live under) Never had a proper stable job, only freelance stuff that, again, I just stumble upon, never really going out to look for it. I have ADHD and a propensity to frustration, so DOING stuff and teaching myself skills are HARD, further lowering my value as a productive member of society. I'm still a virgin, don't really go out to look for any partners too. I see all people as just that, random people that might or might not be fun to hang around with, oblivious to any subtle clues people show to me, and even if I notice, fear of this new world of intimacy pushes me back greatly, for lack of experience. All of this shows a great fear of failure as well, sings of trauma. I'm a feral child, following impulses, and society doesn't have any use for me, and only close friends can appreciate my personal charm. I can only do all of this because I'm lucky to still be living with my grandparents to this day. Angels that take care of me and treat me like their favorite child forever. But I recognize the diservice I'm doing to myself by extending this lifestyle for this long, even though I try to justify or rationalize that EVERYONE should relax a bit more and have fun in such a hard world... The reality is, all of this shall come to an end someday, and if I'm not prepared, I'm gonna have a bad time. They say you should fail as much as possible when young, and I've avoided failure like the plague to this day, avoiding it by not playing the game, actively demonizing the game and what it does to people... But I need to learn how to defend myself and stand up for myself someday.... Great video as always Elliot! Truly talking about the stuff that has to be talked about more! Thank you for informing the masses and bringing awareness.

I was crazy infantilised and coddled as a child, and it's taken many years of therapy to even get as far as I have. I grew up with autism and my parents continued babying me and having extremely low expectations and now I'm having to put in the work to catch up with what I missed. I have a lot of longstanding mental health problems that crippled my ability to reason, to understand instructions, to organize, to devise plans and follow through. I frequently infantilized myself into my 20's because I believed I was just stupid. I put my foot down in 2019 and have been working hard to increase my ability to function, and while I sometimes miss the simplicity of puers aeternis life, I don't miss how empty and worthless I felt. Life has been better even though I have more problems than ever before.

In psychology, there's a known phenomenon of an "age regression" that can happen when peopled are really stressed. They go back to things of comfort, usually things from their childhood as a coping mechanism. I think its pretty obvious that this wave of self-infantilization is a big coping mechanism for a lot of us who are moving into stages of our lives where we have to start taking on more responsibilities and are just really overwhelmed. Especially with how hard it is to even just afford to live right now. We convince ourselves that we don't need to move out yet, or get a job yet, or graduate yet because we're still kids and we're not ready for it. But the truth is, we are ready for it, we're just in a point in time right now where its much harder to take care of those responsibilities. So things that we normally should be able to do (ie: move out, get a job, pay bills, be an adult, etc.) are near impossible for a lot of people. So a lot of us just give up and say "eh, I'm still a kid anyway, I'm not ready for all of that" or "I'm just a girl, I'm not meant for all of this." Instead of going online and straight complaining about how hard life is, we go online and use a humor-based, relatable coping-mechanism to complain about how hard life is in a round-about way. I'm definitely guilty of this and have to actively stop myself from thinking this way. It's not that I'm "not ready for" or "not built for" something, its just that things are HARD right now. Its perfectly okay to feel stressed and overwhelmed by the state of the world right now and how difficult it is to afford to live in it. But I'm not gonna convince myself that the reason it's hard is my fault because I'm "just not meant to live that kind of life/not ready for it".

Tip from an episode of Bluey: Work smarter not harder. It’s an old saying that didn’t originate in Bluey but I figured it was worth quoting.

I wish people could recognise that some individuals have different needs, without taking that as an opportunity to deny those people agency. It's like there are only two options: fully functional adult who gets zero help from anyone around them, and child who must be led around.

I do not infantilize myself. I am infantilized by others.

I'm a teen. I'm 15, but I can look like I'm 13 sometimes. From my point of view, it is painfully obvious that I am not treated as human- a majority of the time. For example: being interrupted like it's nothing by adults around me, adults talking about me and even asking my mom questions about or related to me, as if I'm not right there and can't answer the person myself. Proving myself capable over and over, only to be not trusted in the end, and have things over explained to me, no matter how much I show people that I am knowledgeable in the subject. This is my life, everyday. This is my friends' life, everyday. I can't wait until part two, this video essay is incredibly interesting!!

the closing sentence is something im very passionate in thinking about how being compared to a child at any age is an insult (eg: childish immature) and any behavior that's approximate to adult like is a compliment like 4 year old johny being called grown up and mature adult like whatever big boy for behaving. people hate kids for being kids, most things people could hate about kids are whats in their natural nature like ofc kids will be loud and ask silly things and be energetic, people don't like the concept of how kids are naturally, having a child who can resemble an adult in mentality and behavior is very praised and its weird bc a lot of adults are bad at communication and other things and just idolize themselves bc they are older which is absolute bullshit.

This is really interesting. As a black AFAB pretty much my whole life people have projected strength on to me. Since I became an adult I’ve gone out my way indulge in ‘easy’ things were I can cause I’ve been fighting for so long. So having people view me as someone who doesn’t hold all the answers and is ‘just a girl’ is what I need sometimes. I know I’m capable. I’m a masters student hoping to get a PHD but I also long for a life outside of this where I don’t have to work to survive or worry about the ways the government is stripping my people of rights. But yeah we shouldn’t let that completely hide us from the worlds issues at large like we can’t do anything. I think most people indulge in the nostalgia cause 1) it’s easier to access than waiting for reruns 2) good emotions and memories. With my ADHD I know how humiliating it can be especially when my interests are deemed silly or babyish cause of infantilisation. I really want to give people the benefit of the doubt that these are mostly just anti-work memes.

To answer the last question, no, obviously not. If we did children wouldn't be used as a cudgel wielded to oppress others. "Think of the children" is both dehumanizing the child and the group the moral panic is pointed towards.

Now this, this is some excellent stuff right here. I especially love the interview section where you not only bounce off of each other and share ideas, but interject where you see a flaw or something you can expand upon in a better way. Excellent, excellent stuff.

I don't understand how someone can be so correct about mental health and development but be so wrong and incorrect about politics.

Truly madly deeply I cannot believe this conversation was had without mentioning trauma or trauma informed care.