J. Krishnamurti - When the Observer is the Observed: All Fear Comes to an End | Black Screen 

It’s not an understanding. It is a change in perception. I liken it to being underwater in a pool. You feel like you are indirectly connected to everything. I experienced the elimination of fear a short time before the unitive experience. I’m not sure when fear dropped away because it was so subtle I didn’t notice. It was only when I thought about fear did I realize it was gone.

I haven`t had this realization, I experience a lot of turmoil, confussion and conflict

If, for example, you play a musical instrument, and you are trying to learn a new piece of music. Every day you try and try. But you just can't get it. In the end you give up. One day, you start to play your instrument, you have a go at playing the music that has defeated you. As if by magic, you find you can play the music flawlessly. You are no longer struggling, you are relaxed. The ending of struggle and ambition and too much thinking has allowed your skill and abilities to ‘kick in’. You are not mindless, or mechanical, or an automaton, you are entirely focused on what you are doing - but somehow there is a kind of effortlessness, where your self criticising has taken a back seat. You are vital and awake but not analysing with thinking. Your senses are awake and open. A sense of correctness and 'just knowing what to do next' overtakes you. It is both entirely personal and connected to the faculty of intelligence, which is universal. This is Observation without the Observer. Note : - - It was the act of 'giving up' of 'not caring about getting it right' - - that unlocked the capacity to observe without interference from the Observer (or ego). Edit Just to clarify, in the context of observing the Self, it is this kind of magic, (which is a dangerous word because of too many fantasy connotations), that allows us to - - ‘suffer’ - - jealousy or anger or violence etc. - - happening within us - - - AND AT THE SAME TIME OBSERVE THOSE DISTURBING EMOTIONS. We have, TOGETHER , the intelligence to OBSERVE, along with the agitation and distraction of jealousy (or violence - - or even madness). The painful aspect is that to ‘live out’ these disturbing emotions we are required to do so somewhere real, in front of other people. ('Live out' - - with intelligence not with stupidity). So we have to TOUGHEN UP. Stop feeling sorry for ourselves. The most absolutely critical aspect of everything Krishnamurti talks about is this capability to Observe without an Observer. If you can grasp this magical concept then you will develop the intelligence to understand all the stuff you don't want to look at. It is the expression of Real Maturity.

@@bh_486 Thanks for your lengthy response. Much appreciated. And very helpful. Looking at your response, I see that ambition, as you say, dominates. A habit developed in my mind that experiencing “fear,” or any emotion, would end that emotion, so there began an effort to end an emotion by forcing the mind to experience it. So there was a motive, an ambition, to achieve some result. Are we, in this culture especially, but maybe in all cultures, are we deeply conditioned to be ambitious, to strive, to achieve some goal, either outwardly or inwardly? So the question arises, can the mind be aware without any motive, any effort, to achieve? As I’m writing this, there is the question of whether there is, not an understanding but a perception, as another person replied, that the observer IS the observed? Do we see this? If this is true, then is there anything that one can do? I am it! Me and the “fear” are one. There’s only the one thing. At this moment there’s the perception that this is not seen deeply by this mind. It’s been accepted, at times, intellectually, verbally, but not as an actual fact. Does it have to be rediscovered again and again? Does it require the complete ending of the self? All wanting, all striving, all achieving? Everything that has been the preoccupation of one’s life? Can that happen without becoming a vegetable?

@@eduardovaldez9292 Thanks for your reply. Very helpful.