Jarred Joy - The Headgum Podcast - 150 

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All of the rice was honestly one of the funniest things Geoff has ever done

All of the Rice begins at 22:05

Geoff’s first line in his tv debut being “Marty!” Frankly blew my jorts clean off

I love Allie asking Amir basketball questions. Really do need her on Buckets

How do I explain to my fiance why I’m walking around singing “Extra soy I want y’all to scald sand” without ruining our relationship

Seeing Geoff on TV was gut wrenching - congrats!

anyone else notice how geoff's songs have taken on a distinctly anti-rice agenda since having to sing the rhythm of the rice a million times during the livestream? fascinating turn in the plot of this slowly-unfolding rice-themed concept album

I love how much these people are coming back I think this group makes a perfect semi regular base cast for the podcast

Allie’s really serving with these smiles of contempt, pity, and baseline confusion towards Geoffrey. Slay queen!

This was a top tier episode. All of The Rice is a banger

Everyone is talking about All of the Rice, but "does it stay creamy my friends?" is legit one of the funniest lines of all time.

All of the Rice is the Song of the Bummer!

I haven't listened to this yet but the thumbnail of Geoff smiling gave me a visceral gut reaction. I had to fight a basic, animal urge to punch my computer screen. Anyways, great ep (presumably)!

22:10 the anticipation of what is about to come is just overwhelming

First show that brad didn’t look pissed the entire time haha

'All of The Rice' is the 'Rhythm of The Rice' squeakquel that people have been clamoring for 👏👏👏

Geoff, I'll give you one thing, you're impossible to underestimate.

It's the season of musicals and I'm 100% here for it!! Holy shit Im loving these songs in the middle of the episodes. And this one is by far the best so far!

I’m convinced Allie only guests to show Chicken that he doesn’t have the thinnest ankles in the biz.

Geoff making the argument that raising retirement age is like "adjusting for inflation" because of increasing life expectancy simultaneously made me spit out my coffee from laughter and chilled me to my core because that's the exact kind of shit someone in politics would say and people would be like "yeah no that makes sense actually". Never allow Geoff near politics.

Though he almost passed out while performing it that "All Of The Lights(Rice Remix)" by Geoff was a work of art.

This show is *my* *beach* Needless to say I'm not doing well

brad really brought it this ep

This episode is going to do numbers for the "headgum podcast musical bits" channel

"cash her outside with a jacket" on was good Brad

Lyrics: All of the rice! All of the rice Ruin the rice in here baby Extra charred I want y'all to scald soy Burn up the rice in here baby You know about grains Want you to drink hoisin sauce Want you to char all of the grains Dark char, rice in jars All of the rice, all of the rice Until it's Benihana where we are All of the rice SooOOOoooooooy If you want rice you can spill hoisin all over the sand If you eat grains you will ruin the rest of your life Something wrong, my stomach churns I cooked the rice, but it didn't burn I ate the rice, she called the feds I did that time, and ate that bread I'm just kidding, it wasn't bread It was ancient grains, slathered in soy To my surprise, consistency of sand I had to take rice to that ghetto university Rice! White rice, brown rice, fried rice, black rice, sticky rice All of the rice, all of the grains Jasmine, bomba, par-boiled, long grain, OMSB All of the rice Ruin some rice in here baby Extra soy, I want y'all to scald sand Scoop up the char in rice baby You know about grains, want you to house hoisin sauce And want you to char all of the grains

I wish I could hear this for the first time again!

That feeling when Geoffrey comes back from the break with a new track....

ALL OF THE RICE IS THE BEST THING THAT IVE EVER HEARD

does geoff know that we are about to have one of the worst rice shortages in a long long time. and somehow it is his fault.

All of the rice was pure aural poison. 10/10 will listen again

I thought I was done with this podcast and then I started drinking again. So here I am suffering in the cold darkness of the Headgum podcast once more.

I hope geoff reads these comments and knows that he is spinning gold! Please keep it up Geoff! this is my favorite episode simply because of " All of the rice"....So silly and stupid but its actually Kaufman-level brilliance.

Earned a like at 22:09

Geoff is really becoming an Al of himself, Weird or otherwise

Ignore this, just reminding myself for future 22:04

Allie is joy, Amir is soy, and Geoff is *no*

this episode technically isn't canon without the logo underneath the zoom videos

This podcast being released on a Friday when I’m looking forward to my weekend is like taking a runner on the last mile of their marathon and breaking their kneecaps, this show cripples my weekend

I woke up with a really bad flu and somehow seeing this in my feed was the worst part of my morning

This song was hall of fame

My kids won't stop screaming "All of the rice"

The overarching complacency that was shown regarding the retirement age is depressing. Yes they still have it better than America, but the world as a whole should be aiming for progress. The ideal world will only exist when we accept we deserve the ideal world. It will be a long journey, but our goal should be a world where the idea of having to work just to live is abolished. Work is necessary and we all understand that. But as it stands it’s an abusive relationship where if you don’t work you starve, get sick, or get shamed for using communal resources. We should work for a world where we work as little as possible and just have room to enjoy life. Retirement age could be 45 and we would all be fine. Just greed and capitalism and greed making us work a life sentence just for being alive, which none of us asked for. And yes we are lucky and life is a gift, but a “gift” shouldn’t be held over our heads and force us into situations where people are taken advantage of or being mistreated just because they have to have a job to survive.

That song was amazing and I loved that so much 😂

this is a top 10 ep of all time

This episode was, to my surprise, consistency of sand.

what an excellent crew

scold sand, all of the grains, sooooooiy

I mean we've all seen Geoff's "gravit-ass"

What a horrible way to start my Friday, thanks for trying everyone except Geoff!

Geoff absolutely brought the joy and the soy. Heard the aural version and then immediately jumped to RU-vid to see the reactions on video.

I miss when Amir was more engaged with the show. Remember "Oh Say Can You Grease"?

To the Powers That Be: I would pay genuine hard cash to attend Headgum: The Musical on tour across the US. All Of The Rice deserves a stage.

Geoff has Chars on Chars mah Gawd

"It's nice to see a country that isn't dominated by Capitalism" Is a fascinating thing to say about France

Amir shines once again! don’t wanna make this comment about me, but that “does it stay creamy, my friend?” line CRUSHED at my geophew’s (the exact opposite of a zephew) bris this afternoon. thanks!

You heard of the white album? Well this is the rice album and it's charred for sure. I'll buy it.

that Goat Joy Feeling

I almost spit my water out for all of the rice

This show is the paid Twitter blue of podcasts

22:05 ad ends ALL OF THE RICE

Amir breaking at 23:50 lol

This is day 7 of me asking Geoff if I can be on the podcast

We need Faris to mix us a studio quality version of All of the Rice

I like Brad’s Daniel Johnston shirt-Geoff’s rice music is definitely taking after Daniel J’s back catalogue 😂

I dislike Geoff’s withered ankles and toxic masculinity as much as the next guy but all of the rice was one of the few high points of this podcast

"I had to take rice to that ghetto university"

I hope we get a full version of that Blink cover (I miss soy, I miss soy...)

Watching Amir’s face during all of the rice says it all (how did it come to this)

The only antidote to this this this weekly poisoning of me is Brad's T-Shirt of Daniel Johnston. He is a man of immaculate taste, really. While Geoff is, well, an emasculate waste.

rice in jars? how about a ricin jar. so it's like jarred rice but it's poison.

If you want rice you can spill hoison all over the saaaaand🎶

Amir is sorta in this.

24:45 Oh, Brad actually wrote and performed a rice song recently at the time of writing this comment

Maximising gash? Geoff didn't you go to Paris with your girlfriend? I hate to ask but how do u change how u swang that thang transatlantically?

until its benihana where we are might get that tattooed

All of the rice = all time

As a french viewer Geoff saying he thinks pushing pension age to 64 is fine is the first time i've felt offended by a joke listening to the podcast

this show makes me want to bring back the death penalty in california, good job jheiffe

As always, Geoff sides with the bourgeoisie against the common folk who listen to podcasts,,,,

I want you to scald sand has not left my brain all week

Geoffrey is a Casey Neistat of himself

all of the rice.....

On a sandwich?

I’m gong to blame the international rice shortage on Geoff. I know he’s supporting the rice industry, but I feel like he’s a detriment. 🍚

We need Reilly back on the p-cast

Life expectancy is absolutely going up! The hell?

19:40 22:10 28:50

At this point I actually think Geoff should be cast as Bond so he'll have less time to do this podcast

huh, seems like there's one more person than usual on the pod today... did you really need geoff for this one?

I'm starting to get worried about Amir

22:54

If this "Headgum Tour" isn't just Geoff performing a fucked up Kids Bopz x Grains concert.....I'll still go....just gonna be..........charred about it.

Who’s Jarred

Who’s Jared Joy?

Got some free feet content I didn't ask for...

i don't really like the rice songs, but this one i actually love, and funny because i don't like that kanye song at all. LOL.

This is day 7 of asking Geoff if I can be on the podcast

geoff is only making all of these rice songs so that on the next 24 hour live its not the same one every time.