My mom did this. She ate everything with her fingers. Everything. It's like utensils didn't exist. So we just changed her diet to things she could pick up. She didn't know what a napkin was either. Even cereal.. She'd just plunge her hand right into the bowl and scoop up what she could. Very calm about it. Not frustrated or anything. It was just normal to her. Even if everyone else was using a spoon, and she had a spoon, too, it just seemed like it never occurred to her to use her spoon. Horrible disease. I'm so sorry to everyone who has to go through this. 😢
That’s exactly how I felt as my Moms dementia progressed at the same time watching my grandson grow from infant to toddler it was like all the skills she lost he was building. It was a strange time. I miss her and I’m glad she is at peace now. 🥹
Not sure if you thought of this yet, but I eventually bought my wife some children’s sippy cups. They really cut down on spilling. I also bought some weighted plates with high edges. She got in the habit of pushing the plate off of the table. With the weighted dishes, which are made of thick sturdy plastic and have a rubber ring on the bottom, she is unable to push it and it pretty much stays in place when she’s eating. Just a few suggestions for when it gets to that point. Cheers, Dave!
Yes! I just changed to sippy cups with a straw a couple of weeks ago. It’s important to think about this stuff and make life easier. Have a great rest of your day Dave always good to hear from you.
Don’t sweat the small things. If she’s still feeding herself who cares if she eats with her hands. Think how we revert as we age to babies. Babies eat with their hands. Enjoy your dinner and look at your beautiful wife.
I know my father stopped eating at the table, but he would eat things we would put on the center island. The medical staff called it grazing. They said never force feed them. If you put food out that they have liked in the past they will pick it up with their hand and eat it. They were right. God bless you for the wonderful care you are giving your wife.
It appears as though she is calmly reversing all her life skills back to birth. She's eating like a toddler, without the pickiness of a toddler. I'm glad she isn't angry, afraid or otherwise distressed. You're handling it perfectly but it must be very sad for you to see her reversal. I'm so sorry. ♥
My mom had Alzheimer’s and did the same thing. The first time she did it was with a piece of pie. She began smashing it with a fork, then she tried to pick it up with her fingers. It was coconut cream so that didn’t work. I cleaned her fingers off and she let me feed her. I started giving her foods that she could easily pick up and just ignored the mess. God Bless you John, I know how difficult it is. You are doing such a wonderful job 🙏❤️
I hope that in a future time this will bring you peace. Eventually. While my mother didn’t have dementia she had numerous health problems but my sister and I cared for her the last 5 years of her life. I salute you.
Eating with hands common . My Mom ylhad dementia & finger foods were helpful. Utensils hard to use.Bless her heart& caretaker. I know exactly what your'e going through. Sending you hugs.❤❤🙏
Dementia such an awfull thing i wish you both the very best i did a years training at a dementia care home the main thing was to remember things of the past and music is very helpfull as the sufferer remembers songs and brings them joy wish i could make it all go away love to you both❤
In the early summer of 2021… The very first hits that there was something wrong started to show up and it was so subtle. She sure was an engaged and vibrant and intelligent woman. We had so much fun together and did so many things over our 46 years. Thanks for your comment, I appreciate it.
Yet interesting that she has the where-with-all to adjust glasses with her pinky, that does not have food debris on it, so as not to get grease or anything on them. That in itself, is quite telling of her remaining cognitive skills.
I just put my husband to bed. He wouldn't eat anything. Months ago he ate with his fingers....but, I guess it's more acceptable for that? Guys eating with their hands. Now, I just wish I could get him to eat! This isn't to pick at you....but maybe help you have peace that she's eating? It's really hard when they start to refuse food.
Doesn't bother me if anyone eats with their fingers. That's how most of us start. I had a daughter in law that was disgusted by picking up any food with fingers. Even ribs, chicken wings or legs, pizza etc. Her problem.
There's nothing wrong with eating with her fingers. She obviously prefers it and many cultures eat like this as do young children. The important thing is the eating part. Have a pack.of soapless baby wipes or a moist wash cloth. Ditch the napkin.
We still use utensils, but my husband insists on cutting everything up into mincemeat, even soups and ice cream. It’s a quirk he developed in his dementia journey.
maybe some music or something she used to like playing on a screen or even cartoons or animals? something fun and upbeat she used to like? or something you like if she doesn't show any interest. i always eat with youtube vids now. keeps me company.
These are good suggestions. I have recently started putting on animated shows and movies and she seems to really enjoy that. She smiles and likes the music too. Thanks for your comments!
he already addressed this in a video that yes she would want to help other people in the same situation and there is nothing shameful or wrong in it. most people watching here have a loved one with dementia and it gives everyone a ray of hope and a feeling of not being alone while dealing with this. if you are going through this and can help other people, why not do so?
