Korean American experience: growing up korean american! but it's also a grwm :') 

“if you were a racist, you would get attacked.” “so that was good” hahahahahahaga

you were born in the bay area bc you're bae

i have to sleep but this is more important

Thank you so much for sharing! It's very relatable...I'm Russian and I grew up in Italy. Sounds like nothing much, since it's white people anyway...but I definitely stood out in the crowd with my lighter coloring (got bullied for it too), we had no relatives at all, and my mom aggressively tried to force the Russian culture and language onto me. I came to hate so much, I didn't want to have anything to do with it. It seemed so obsolete when literally no one among my peers was Russian. Until suddenly one day we moved back, and oh boy was it hard to adapt. I already hated my heritage and I was an adolescent barely able to speak, read and write in the midst of teenage Russian angst I couldn't relate to whatsoever. I ended up being a foreigner twice in the span of a decade. It was hard, very much so. Kudos to you for willingly learning about your roots in such a loving way and with all the right reasons behind it.

As a Mexican American I can definitely relate to feeling detached from the rest. Till this day I still struggle with understanding a few cultural things involving the Hispanic culture. My Spanish is okay but it's not that good. I also have a difficult time reading and writing or forgetting how to say words since I was never taught. Since my mother always worked once I started school because of my father no longer being in the picture, I do feel more Americanized. I don't really speak Spanish unless I have to, such as talking with my mother. But I've made it a goal this year to better my Spanish skills so hopefully that goes well.

im basically the opposite. i was born in korea and lived there for some time before immigrating to america, meaning that i am a 1st gen korean american. even in america, i was always attached to korean culture and entertainment. i spoke korean at home, loved kpop, watched kdramas, ate korean food, wore korean makeup, k fashion, and more. i never really paid attention to american entertainment. bc i was a korean so immersed in korean entertainment i felt like such a foreigner at school. ppl would bully me for liking kpop. ppl would stare at me like an alien at shops like brandy melville and even public places like the park. it especially got worse when the pandemic started and everyone started looking down on asians for being a "virus". one guy even told me straight to my face that he would never like me bc i was asian. this really slapped my mental health in the face and i started to deteriorate. i developed anxiety and depression for some time and started to self harm bc i thought no one really liked me for being korean and for being who i am and who i wanted to be. it got so bad to the point where i really wanted to just throw myself away bc i thought me and my koreanness was driving ppl around me away. this sounds really corny but stray kids and bts really helped me get back on the road. songs like magic shop and mixtape 3 were comfort to me, songs like hellevator and levanter reflected how i felt. this sounds dark but if it werent for them i probably wouldnt even be alive right now. thankfully im doing much better now. i still battle with anxiety and insecurities everyday but i think that's a life-long battle for me and hopefully "blessings wait for you" as chan told me in the song mixtape 3. i hope someone could relate to this.

I'm crying because my grandmother on my mom's side is going through Alzhiemers right now. She is only fluent in Navajo, a Native American language. She doesn't speak English and when you said you don't remember ever having a conversation with her. It hit me. I'm full Navajo and it hurts knowing I was separated from being saturated in my culture. I feel you.. you're not alone. Also, it's not just immigrant families. Millions of Native Americans who are originally from here as adults and younger generations are being affected this way by being separated from their identity.

"being distant from your culture, it really is a lonely feeling" it really is, it really is:'(

_you don’t know how long i’ve waited for this-_

“This Korean cant speak Korean what is she” I CAN RELATE TO THIS SO MUCH WOW

i feel like i can relate a lot, being bilingual/bicultural (?) and all, even though my upbringing was a bit different

OOF GIRL I FEEL YA. That feeling of detachment and like you don't belong because you cannot speak a certain language-100% me. As a second generation Filipino American that never learned tagalog or visayan, I have never been able to fit in or relate to my mom's side of the family. SO many times I have felt ashamed/embarrassed by the fact that I only speak English. At family events everyone speaks tagalog/visayan and I have no clue what is happening. On occasion, someone will go out of their way to speak to me in English, but never for very long. I just want to curl up in the corner and roll away agh. Bless your soul nina, you have put so many of these feelings into words that I never fully confronted.

Ninaaaaa I love this thank you. I can really relate to your story. I’m a chinese adoptee who isn’t really connected to Chinese culture at all. My parents are white Americans & since I came here as an infant I’m only fluent in English. I feel all of the same feelings about not relating to the Chinese community because I cannot speak mandarin. I’m teaching it to myself but I still can’t have a conversation in it. It makes me really insecure because as much as people might deny it, in order to be considered a “real asian” you have to know “your language.” Chinese adults think I’m stupid or unresponsible for not inherently knowing mandarin & some of my more-culturally-Chinese friends jokingly shame me sometimes & it sucks. It just sucks when another Chinese person approaches me & I have to create a divide between myself & them because I can’t speak mandarin. I almost feel like I’m denying my ethnicity & cultural roots by not being able to speak Mandarin. I wrote my college essay on this topic & I could go on & on about it but I just wanted to say when I watch your videos,, just knowing that you’re Korean-American & aren’t fluent in Korean but are working toward it & are thriving & living is really comforting. Thanks 💞

Nina :) I don't know if you've already known this thing, but, my mom has same hair like you. 100% Korean :) we call it 곱슬머리 I think we Korean have 3 types of hair 곱슬/반곱슬/생머리 wave/half wave/straight hair. You have wave hair called 곱슬머리, and I think it's beautiful. We tried to straight our hair with perm or straight tools or something like that. But as you know, these days the wavey hair is trend so, we tried to wave our hair :):) I love your story and Thank you for sharing your heart.

I feel the same way. I can’t speak Spanish and I have so many friends that can. My friends speak to their parents in Spanish and I can barely catch a word and understand it. Plus in school it feels like everyone else knows more Spanish than me that aren’t even Hispanic. It hurts and I feel insecure all the time. Especially since I’m half Mexican and am pretty pale. People don’t realize my background and I feel so disconnected. You speaking about these things makes me feel less alone. I believe you are brave to talk about yourself and I really appreciate this video. Thank you.

"because i was having two languages spoken to me at the same time, it did affect the way i developed language-wise" I FEEL THIS SO MUCH.

As an afro-latina i relate to this sooo well, and i always feel like i cant 'act' or talk abt my Hispanic heritage because im 'too dark' or i don't look Spanish, and bc of this i never bothered to learn how to communicate with my moms side of the family *who speaks Spanish* bc i never felt like i belonged. Then on the other hand i cant listen or 'act' Haitian bc im 'too light' and im 'not black' And for the longest time i jus would not identify with either bc either way sum one is offended. But watching this showed me that i cant change the way i live my life bc of how other people react, watching this really showed me im not alone, and not to take life 4 granted.. Thx 🇩🇴 🇭🇹 heres to being proud afro-latinas, and proud people.. 😊 😊

I really love Nina, she’s so nice....I feel like she’s my best friend that I can trust her...She just has a really bright nice vibe

I always took my mom keeping our culture and identity for granted and never understood why she didn't make my little sister and i speak English to her so she could learn and it wasnt until recently that she told me that she knew that it was hard on her not becoming Americanized but that it was a conscious decision on her part so that my sister and i had a way of being connected to our culture and making sure that we kept our language. Now that she's secure in that and my sister and i both speak fluent English and Spanish and understand and can relate to both cultures I think we now see it as our job to cheer our mom on as she starts to really put effort into learning English and now it's our turn to help her. Anyway, this made me tear up and even though I'm Mexican and not Korean I still feel such a large connection to all immigrants and children of immigrants that this was really relatable and I'm just so thankful for my mom... btw Nina my mom doesn't really understand everything you say but she really likes your channel and videos :)

Im Japanese Brazilian and I relate so much with you Nina

WHEN U STARTED CRYING I WAS LIKE "bABY NO-" i JUST WANNA JUMP THROUGH THE SCREEN AND GIVE U A HUGG sTAY STRONG BUB WE GOTCHUu

i cried when you started to cry :(

nina, i loved this video so much. i am a first gen chinese-american, but my parents put me in chinese school when i was young so i was forced to learn how to speak their language fluently. i took this for granted and was always able to converse with my family in english and chinese, so i never felt that disconnect you felt when growing up. your story was very eye-opening to me, and has made me very appreciative of my chinese roots. thank you

I can relate to this so so much because I was born in London and my dad was from Canada and my mum was from the Philippines so I was mostly exposed to English growing up and I look nothing like my fillipino culture so I too felt very distant from my culture. So when my grand father passed away I realised I had never had a full conversation as well and I’ve never really communicated with my mum’s parents so I felt so bad about myself so now I’m learning the language and really want to keep going. This video just really hit home and motivated me.

30mins? OKAY NINA THANK YOU FOR THIS BLESSING. I LOVE YOU NINA SO F MUCH :)

i am a first generation latin american and... wow!!! this hit me so hard!!!! i grew up with speech problems because my parents spoke only spanish and i had to speak english in school, until i ended up only focusing on english and american culture as i got older. im super insecure about my spanish, as most of my friends in my friend group can speak spanish fluently. i can understand it perfectly, but i can’t get myself to actually speak full sentences. my grandma recently was diagnosed with cancer and she flew from venezuela to america to spend her last days with us, and holy shit what you said about your great grandma really hit me. the only time i’ve ever had a conversation with my grandma was when i was very little, so even now i can’t remember. i’ve decided to start working on my spanish so i can enjoy my last days with her as much as possible. thank you so much for sharing your story nina, you are so amazing.

This is so me!! I’m a Polynesian Australian, a Cook Islander. Being born and raised in Sydney, my brothers and I have always grown up being the only Polynesians around. If anything, living in Australia taught us that our difference was something that intrigues people and to be proud of that. I've always been proud to be Australian. But naturally, being so far away from our people and our culture, we have grown up/ are growing up to identify more closely to the ‘white’ world. We live very Australian lifestyles, we went to school here, we love the beach, our accents, its just what we know. My parents are both born and raised kiwis (NZ) but moved to Sydney to start a life. (The rivalry between NZ and Australia was a whole other thing we had to figure out too ffs lol) My family is very independent, we didn’t grow up with any family around us. My parents did everything alone and I praise them for it, we're doing so well now. But I never had my grandparents around or my cousins with me, no aunties or uncles. No one. Christmas’s, New Years and birthdays have always just been us. So, long story short, we got jackshit of our culture growing up. Like you, I never really noticed how bad it really was until I finished high school, where you become the most self-aware. and when my Grandmother past away. She lived in the Islands. Having to go to the islands for her death made me truly see how far away from my culture I was. Seeing the other girls my age able to speak the language and talk and laugh with my parents felt like I was watching the world go by behind a glass pane, its a real feeling lol. A part of me always resented my parents for not teaching us the culture. But tbh, even for them, being in Australia, with their Aussie kids and Aussie friends.. they had to change too. It was just another thing that pushed us even further away.. I’d go back to visit New Zealand, to visit my family, my people and I’d be reminded of how different I was compared to them. My accent, my personality.. my entire life. How I can’t understand or speak my cultural language or understand its customs.. it was all magnified- even little cultural quirks were things I never understood, and that was seen as something that 'weakened' my DNA apparently. Visiting NZ, I'd watch the haka and my beautiful cultural ceremonies and traditions... and I'd understand nothing. My culture has always been something I’ve been proud of. But now being older (I'm only 19 I gotta chill lol) I get how conflicting it becomes for people like us to tell others we’re something that we know close to nothing about. It’s a massive insecurity of mine coz I want to give something to my kids from my culture one day too :( I dont regret my life as an Australian, I'm so proud of where I'm from. I just regret what it cost us sometimes. Watching this video has just touched me, its something I’ve been trying to figure out recently as well so I resonated with you on such a true level. Hearing about your Grandmother made me emotional with you. I so get it 💛 It’s almost like being torn between two worlds. Thank you for this x (sorry this was so long! I got in the feels lmao) I wish I could meet you!!

I'm writing my common app essay currently. It's about being bi-cultural, because I'm Indian- American. This is really emotional for me because I really relate to this, and as I'm watching this, I'm seeing that I had the same thoughts as you did. I don't feel close to my parents in their Indian identity just because I've grown up American, and I've forced these American expectations of family on them, and in the end, I've felt neglected or distant from them. But they have different ways of showing love and family than I know as an American, so I'm now working to overcome these expectations and norms I've set for them over the years and like, grow closer to them. It'd hard though you know? I don't know where to start, and I don't know how to open up to people I haven't been closed off to for such a long time.It's still really difficult for me to talk to them about things I care about, probably because I'm afraid of how they might perceive it. I don't want them to judge me, so I close myself off. I'm hoping that as this year goes on, I can mend my relationship with them and not be as shy with the people who see and love me the most.

living with my grandmother and mom for most of my life ( my grandma is from korea and she was an immigrant for awhile. mom is a second generation american-korean ). i’ve lived with my grandma for a few months and i am very close to her. watching your videos make me want to learn more about my family’s culture. thank ya nina. 💖

I'm 2nd generation Cuban-American and when I was younger I always felt embarrassed about not being able to speak Spanish with my extended family, and I still do. I've been wanting to learn Spanish for a while now so that I can speak to my grandparents and cousins, etc., as they don't speak English well. I haven't grown up around my extended family, because my family has moved around the U.S. a lot for my Dad's job, but we visit them, in Miami, about once a year. Every time we visit I feel so happy and connected to my culture. I just wish I didn't feel so embarrassed when I try to learn and practice Spanish because it really is something I want, but I just feel so insecure about it when I try to speak it. Anyway, thanks for this video, It's encouraging to see other people going through and overcoming similar situations as yourself!

I literally paused the video when I saw your description, made myself tea, warmed up some tamales, and grabbed some cookies. Now I'm ready :3

I'm half Japanese and can relate so much to this. Growing up I always struggled to understand what the heck I was, I hated my name because no one could ever read it or write it, I hated looking different and it took me a lot to finally be okay with being half white half Japanese (I also have wavy-ish hair, while my sibling have very Asian hair, so I'm always pointed out as the less Japanese between my siblings, fun stuff). The turning point for me was when I started studying history in college and getting more interested in my family's past and their struggles living in a different country and making through all of it. I wanted to talk to my grandma and ask about her past, to know more, but I would always push it aside because I felt like it was too hard, since as she was getting older she wouldn't understand Portuguese as well as Japanese, and I just thought that one day I'd do it. She passed away in June and I felt like part of my identity was taken away and since then I'm kinda trying to get more in touch with this side of me. Also, my final thesis is about Japanese immigrants and I plan on studying Japanese as soon as college allows me so I can "catch up" a little, I guess.

your're juste so cute I was so emotionally touched and I really loved your video. They always help me growing up since I really can identify myself in your stories so thanks for being who you are and we're all here to help you gain more and more self confidence every day

I am a french Portuguese like you, all my family is 100% Portuguese. I’ve always had a hard time talking it I still have, you talking about your grandma made me realize that I literally have never talked to my grandparents in their native language. But I try really hard, I actually am learning it in college now it’s the second year but I put so much pressure on myself I feel like I can’t do mistakes because I am Portuguese so I should know how to speak it, I really am trying my best but even talking to my parents in Portuguese is extremely hard I’m afraid that I will disappoint them and I know it’s dumb to think like this but I just can’t help it. Your video made me realize I wasn’t lonely, even tho culturally speaking France and Portugal are not as different as America and Korea, but you know every country are different. If you have read all of this well thank you ig but I think I wrote it more for myself than for anyone else (Eva stop pressuring yourself)

this video really pushes me to start learning my homeland's language again, hearing about your great grandmother really made me realize i have never had a conversation with my aunties and i'm ready to change that :) love ya

you just brightened up my day❤️

i love you, you’re a phat ray of sunshine hitting my face on a cold winters day 🤠💞

This was such a wholesome and relatable video, I actually wanted to cry because I have felt the same way about “not being enough” of one race. Such a great vid, keep up the good work on learning Korean 💖👍

nina this was BEAUTIFUL, thank you for being so very honest and open with us! this topic is so important and you are so very well spoken xxx

legit relate to all your struggles since i'm a japanese-indian and i've had to move around a whole bunch 😭💞

nina, the story about your grandma really REALLY hit home for me. i’m also asian american: half japanese and half black, and my grandma doesn’t speak english either and when i was little, i was able to communicate with her because japanese was my first language, but since then, i’ve lost my japanese. she’s getting older and i pray that i don’t lose her soon, but like what you’re saying, i want to speak to her and have adult conversations. also connect to my japanese side and ah like your story REALLY got me because i feel it on a somewhat similar level

Thank you for sharing this. I'm not Korean american, so I can't relate to that aspect of your life. But I understand how you felt lost within your Korean community. I never felt like I fit in with the Jewish community, especially the people my age, because even though I grew up Jewish, I didn't go to their private schools or follow every custom they followed. I still feel like I don't fit in with that community. I also understand that helpless feeling when you were losing your grandma. My oldest sister was disabled and sick for her entire life, and last year she passed away from some health complications. I felt that same helplessness, because there was nothing I could do, and because I had never truly taken the time to be with her and develop a stronger relationship. I guess the point of this rambling is that I get how you feel, and if anything I just want you to know that you're not alone here (:

I'm glad you're able to talk about this and I send you much much much love !! 💕💕

I feel like I can relate to this so much. And just like you, over the past, maybe 2 years I've learned to accept and love my Mexican culture more and get into more of the music, tv shows, etc. Loved the video so much!​

I’m half Korean and half American also ㅠㅠ My dad is american and my mom is Korean! When I was 7, I moved to America but my mom stayed back in South Korea because of her job. I honestly dont like it in America just because a lot of people pick on me for not being Western. Anyways, I visit Korea very often and love it there! Thank you for sharing your story! (btw I was born in South Korea!)

Im also a korean american and when i was younger i didnt have much of a problem speaking korean and english, but i wasnt that fond of my family history, or the history of korea itself. Because of that i had some trouble understanding the culture of korea, and how koreans acted and the reasons for it, and because of that my relatives and sometimes my parents, have a wall between me and them because we didnt understand each others culture's fully. Now when i visited my grandmother, she told me how i didnt make much of an effort in improving my korean or learning about its history. My reply was "im just not interested and i dont have to since i live in america". But as years passed my family had some expectations from me saying how i should take my background nationality more seriously because its who i am and that way, i can learn how to act like ....well....more of a korean person rather than a korean american who just speaks in broken grammar korean. I didnt really think much when i visited my cousins in seoul with my grandmother, and they were able to talk to her so smoothly without pausing or stuttering. I envied them because they could make my grandmother laugh and smile. Also whenever koreans would try to communicate with me and i couldnt understand tgem fully i had a feeling that they were judging me just from it, so i was very embaressed. Ever since then i sat down and had a mental conversation with myself. I should make an effort with learning korean and its culture, and it wont be for impressing anyone but for myself because it could bemefit me in so many ways. Ever since then i watched more kdramas (with subs ofc) and listened to kpop. My first group i staned was astro and now its bts. The more i studied the language and the more i learned of the history i was so....amazed. Like, i was so proud of my background and where my parents came from. A little country like Korea went through so many problems in its past, but it is now known to be one of the most sucessful countries in the world. I am now proud of me being a korean.

nina, you have such a beautiful soul and your videos always leave me with a smile on my face. thank you for telling us your story and being so vulnerable with us! i’m always happy when i see you upload something :)

Nina this made my day 100% better, thank you for sharing a part of your story. Being a Mexican-Amarican who is also under that first generation catagory made growing up and fitting in difficult, there was also piont in my life that made me completely neglected that part of me, but now i can say that I'm not going to feel ashamed of myself and who i am ethically. Like you said yor never too little or not enough of your culture ✌😁

i relate a lot bc im half korean half chinese but was born in america and cant speak either language fluently. im always embarrassed at family gatherings since i cant speak either language and always feel out of place. at some point in my life i decided to start learning korean bc i want to be able to speak to my grandparents properly. im still scared and insecure to speak properly bc of my accent but im trying. also at my college theres a korean and chinese student association but im still insecure going to these bc i feel out of place due to the cultural difference and the fact that i cant speak the language. hearing your story makes me feel better and motivated to keep trying and not care what other people think so thank you for sharing ❤️

Thanks god for thia video because this Sunday was already boring without Nina

one of the most wholesome videos i've seen in a few yonders now that's what i call.. _quality_ _content_

Nina thank you for sharing your story and for letting yourself be vulnerable and speak who you are and why you are the way you are. I'm glad I found your channel :)

hey, thank you so much for this, I'm a Korean-American in high school trying to deal with not being everything I wanna be, which includes not being fluent in Korean and not being in touch with different social groups/society in general... so this really helped, thanks 💕

had to stop everything to watch this lets get this breAAAAAAAAAD ILY

I'm so proud of you so proud of where you are now and i hope you get better and better with everything with you, i am really so proud of you, thank you for sharing for us!! love you so much !! hope you feel so good with everything in yourself soon and i sure you will!! love you neen !!

I cried a lot watching this, that just made think more abou the people around me, and realised a lot of stuff just now and m not feeling very well but very grateful for you to make this kind of videos, thank you nina ❤

I agree too! I was born in the US but my family is entirely Mexican. I'm the second born in America. (Not my ENTIRE family) But we moved back to Mexico and stayed there for 5 years when i was four months old. I was able to develop my Spanish and can speak it pretty fluently. We returned when I was five.I developed my English more here but I couldn't get help from anyone else since everybody was so busy. I've definitely gotten used to being here now but it was difficult because of some racist little kids. I was also put in ELD and I adjusted really well and became a really good student. I was really attached to my mom because my dad didn't move back with us to Mexico. I feel like when you're little, you should really be with your parents to connect with them. I didn't get to do hat with my dad so when my mom had to go to work, I really didn't want to go to school. I wanted to be with her. I was and still am really socially anxious. I'm not introverted or anything but I get really nervous. I've gotten really used to being here now and I am really happy here now. (Where did you get that super cute compact btw?)

Am I the only one who smiles whenever Nina posts a new video!?😂❤️❤️

You are such a sweet heart, don't let this hard feelings get to you, you are awsome, really!! I feel so happy to see you doing videos, it makes me a little bit more strong to go through my insecurities. ily 💜

I love you and your channel so much!!! Thank you for making a video about growing up Korean American, I felt really moved and connected with a lot of the things you said (I’m not Korean, but I’m mixed Asian). I hope you keep making videos like these!❤️❤️❤️

ending the day with your videos is the best goodnight, I really needed a tissue tho, don't ever forget that we love you sosososo much, love from italy

Growing up Mexican, and being bicultural/bilingual, this really hit home, thanks neen 💜

wow... i wasn't expecting to feel this touched and inspired by your video. Your upbringing incredibly similar to my own. Both my parents moved over to the US from Vietnam when they were 9 years old and because of that they're pretty americanized too. I grew up pretty aware of my ethnicity and actually pretty proud of it--I just couldn't speak the language. I tried to speak Vietnamese when I was younger but, like you, I would get teased for how bad it sounded by lots of family members and insecurities settled in. And like you, there was the additional insecurity that I didn't look like a typical Vietnamese girl. I wasn't dainty at all, pretty chubby and that was pointed out to me by everyone. It was sorta easy to not think about it when I was younger because I didn't have that many Vietnamese friends but as I got older and did hang out with majority Vietnamese people, those insecurities reawakened and I felt so shitty about myself. Friends would call me "yellow on the outside but white on the inside" and even though they said it in a teasing manner, because of my long standing insecurity with it, it made me feel even worse about myself. I tried to cope with it by saying I was proud and aware of my culture and that wasn't lessened by my inability to speak the language. But like you, I've been experiencing a lot of deaths in my family, specifically my grandparents, and I came to a realization too that I was disconnected from them and their lives because of the language barrier... It made me realize I did want to learn the language still and that it wasn't too late. I'm currently taking Vietnamese classes right now and the feeling is honestly... amazing. I'm still pretty insecure about speaking it, like yourself, but I realize now that I can at least understand things so much more and I know that if I continue to push myself, I'll get to where I want to be. Thank you so much for sharing your story, it made me feel less lonely in this journey I've encountered basically my entire life haha; i have faith we're both going to reach a greater peace within ourselves :-)

Oooo thank you for this 💕💕 I love hearing people talk about growing up korean American or getting used to America because it makes me feel less alone struggling especially since I’m not around a lot of Koreans. Much love for you💟💟

Thank you for sharing your story! I myself can relate a little bit to your story, my ethnicity is Japanese but I'm born and raised in the Netherlands. Two totally different countries/cultures in literally every aspect possible. When I was young my parents send me to a Japanese school every saturday besides the normal Dutch school, so I was able to pick up both Dutch and Japanese language. But I was extremely unmotivated and didn't put any effort in learning Japanese, probably because I wanted to blend into the Dutch culture more. I always felt left out from everyone else so I started being (unknowingly) embaressed of my Japanese identity. And being the only Asian along with 3 other people out of 70 kids in my grade didn't help either. Sometimes I have trouble understanding my parents, not because of the language but because of the cultural difference. My parents are very Japanese and I'm idk a hybrid lol mixed culture. But now that I've thought about it more (it took me like more than 5 years lol), I'm happy with both of my Japanese and Ducth sides! I try to learn and understand more of the Japanese culture so I can relate more to my family in Japan and ofc my parents. Hopefully I'll be able to communicate with my family in Japan even better the next time I'll be seeing them!

I in a way can relate... With me being mixed race (my mom is half white, half black, and my dad is white), I always felt conflicted on what group I was a part of. Of course I’m just a quarter African but I’m pretty dark, unlike my sister who is pale and blond. I grew up in a really white neighbourhood, so me being brown always made me feel left out and alone. I also took dance classes for over ten years and I was typically the only brown person in all of my classes. Though I’m black, I don’t really look of African decent. I’ve been mistaken as pretty much every race (Indian, Hispanic, and Native especially). People being the same ethnicity as me but not recognizing me as the same as them also didn’t help, like people telling you you weren’t Korean. Now i realize that don’t need to identify with a specific “group” and to just live life. I try to embrace it but it can get a bit tiring to constantly be asked what I am and people assuming what I am and speaking to me in their native tongue but yeah...

nina, the ability you have to make people feel so connected to you and your story no matter how different it might be from our own is just...wow! you definitely don't see this everyday on RU-vid and I appreciate it so so much bc whenever I hear you talk I feel like I can do everything I put my mind and efforts into! you're amazing :)

This might just be one of the most important videos I’ve ever watched in my life.. As a double culture kid, it’s so comforting knowing you’re not alone ❤️ (Especially reading the comments, it’s insane how so many people can relate)

"this korean cant speak korean" thats harsh 😂

Yesss I've been waiting for you to talk about that topic!😊 Because I have a very similar story to yours! I'm ethnically Russian, but I was the first in my family to be born in Belgium (the only one after me is my niece), and my parents were immigrants. I have the same struggles as you when it comes to me talking in Russian: I understand everything, I can answer, but it'll be full of mistakes😅 I grew up being a little bit "scared" to "show off" my Russian heritage, and tbh i don't know why... so I grew up very "Europeanized", even tho my parents and my brother did their best to make me feel like a true Russian. Now I'm really trying to learn more Russian, so I could speak to my family without any problem, and so I could even go live there for a while if I wanted to! Because I really feel like I'm culturally separated from them and it makes me sad Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this topic, it means a lot to me, and I'm sure it's important to other of your subscribers too❤️ Keep up the good content!

Finally, i've been waiting for you! I love you ninaaa..

so proud of you for embracing your culture 💓💓💓 i never had to struggle with this kind of thing, but i’m so happy that you’re overcoming this hardship in your life!!!

"uhhhhhhh get a cup of tea or a snacc or even a meal bc this video is a LONG ONE !!" but what if you're the snacc 😫😫

thank you for sharing this video. 💜 i'm mexican american and i can realte to this. i grew up in america so i was taught both english and spanish at the same time. i could understand it really well but could never speak or write it how i was supposed too. my father died when i was four, so that was hard for my family and i wouldn't have fatherly figure in my life, which was very heartbreaking. it was also hard for me to understand my mexican heritage, i did grew up wanting a quice but never understood why we have a huge party for just turning 15. i did grew up eating mexican food but i could never understand the culture which was a huge problem for me since i really wanted to bond with mexican ppl at my school. i never went to preschool so i was behind on trying to learn but that's when my mom found out i was dyslexic bc i didn't quiet learn fast as other kids in my grade. but as i got older i started to realize that i need to be more into my heritage, and i did but still didn't understand pat of it. i still don't even understand most of what we celebrate or other stuff. but i never gave up, i have so much hope of learning more about my hispanic side.

youre so pretty and your makeup skills are so good! this video honestly helped me in life

This was such a lovely, wholesome, from the heart video! Thank you so much for sharing your story with us!

thank you for being so vulnerable I can relate to you so much on being bicultural/bilingual :)))

i’m sorry to tell my sob story,,, but all the comments and neens got me thinking,,,, i’m korean american (genetically, u kno) but i am “white passing”. my skin is light, i am tall and just larger than other koreans. my father and his family are korean, he moved to america very young, met my mother, boom me. i don’t remember much when my father was around, but after he left, i kinda grew up a white kid, w white kid friends, in white kid scenarios. i’ve never truly experienced parts of korean culture. and, i don’t know how to??? i constantly feel detached from koreans, and korean culture. but i feel,,, i guess left out, of american media. i feel so stressed out trying to think of who and what i am. i’ve always just seen myself as,,, me. but, i want to reach out and learn more about my father and i’s culture :’ )) im sorry to sob abt myself,,, thank u for letting me. also neens i love u, and anyone reading and/or sharing, i also love u

ahh, such a beautiful video, thank you for having the courage to speak about something so important to you!! we love you

morning starts with nina’s video 💛

9:45 "It really just felt like they were judging me, this Korean can't speak Korean what is she" Even though you said it laughing I was about to sob bc that shit really hit near home

i started to panic because i couldn’t see your upload but i got the notification ? that was terrifying but ily nina !

you’re so calming! i love your vibes, thank you for your videos 💖

Thanks nina! I really love this videos when you open to us. And its inspiring seeing how you grow and learn self love, I always believe that self love is the most important one! Really your videos are a cup of tea for me 👌❤

I totally understand you, I’m fully Japanese and I’m the first one in my family that was born in the US😬

loved all your videos but this one hit me. Really appreciate your courage to actually open up. I wish you the best and I can totally say I'm a fan now!

i watched the whole thing and ahh ily nina. Stay strong because you're amazing 💗

i am multiracial too, and im supposed to be able to speak 5 languages. But i only picked up Malay and English. And always been judged for not being able to speak my mother-tongue languages. I can relate to the embarassment. xx

i may not relate to you on this type of level but i feel connected with you somehow :(

hope you’re okay nina, thankyou for sharinggg

You’re story is so touching, thank you for sharing it with us ❤️ I hope you’re future will be filled with happy moments and that you will be fulfilled with the life you will be living ❤️❤️

im more into the video im so sorry about your grandma....i dont like seeing my fav youtuber cry this is so sad

Am I first? Lol I was so early the vid was private

This is video is so inspirational. And very important and personal for me. I’m a Korean adoptee and hearing your life story growing up Korean American and feeling distant from the culture and the language is something that I relate to and I’m still dealing with. So this video was so important for me to watch and hear from you. So thank you for sharing and giving me inspiration to pursue my life as a Korean American. Thank you and I love you!!

Thanks for talking about this. I started tearing up when you talked about your mom because it reminded me of my mom😭 YOU are enough. love your vids💓

A 26 minute Nina video? Sign me up

My dad was born in Portugal, but came over at a really young age so he doesn’t speak Portuguese anymore. I was brought up with a little bit of exposure to Portuguese culture, whenever I went to my grandparents house (they came over with my dad and aunt), but honestly I don’t know much about it. I wasn’t brought up speaking the language, and I don’t even know the full story of how my grandparents came over here. In some ways, I feel like a disappointment to them because instead of taking Portuguese in high school, I’m taking Spanish (I live in a city with a lot of other Portuguese people so they teach it at my school, probably not anywhere else in the states lmao idk). While I can still communicate with them bc they speak English, I feel like it’d make them so happy if I could learn Portuguese. My whole life I’ve never identified as having a culture, bc tbh when I was little I didn’t think white people could have any😂. I just figured my family was boring, but I’ve realized now I’m older that my traditions are pretty different from my friends, and I wish I had taken more of an interest in them. I don’t really see myself as Portuguese bc so many people I see in school are fluent in the language and actually know about their culture, while I don’t. It’s hard to connect with your origins later on in life

nina thank you for opening up about this, hearing other people's experiences is always insightful! even though I'm chinese american, I could still relate to a lot of what you said. especially about language and culture barriers but I'm trying to fix that now, even if it's really hard, I'm just so determined to not let this go.

i really appreciated this video nina

It's 11:30 p.m. (Germany) and I gotta get up at 5:30 a.m. Well what are 30mins of sleep lul