Yep! These women are often their “main chicks”, wives, ride or dies, etc. These women have been through heck, often time raised these dudes like their sons and if the dude “ cheats”, he unleashes his main dog on them at random
My mom was a pick-me. Our lives were hell because she wouldn't leave our dad. Sometimes, a dad leaving is the best thing he can do for his kids. I kind of wish he had left us. Even now when I block clowns, she's romanticizes me somehow, loving the guy into changing as if that has ever been a possibility. Because I choose not to be a pick-me, she doesn't understand me 🙄
I had a pickme mother too It really is pure hell. My dad did leave, but she replaced him with a total a-hole who was only 8 years older than me...the rest you can imagine
I understand the identification of pick me, but sometimes things are so much psychologically deeper than they seem so I can't really say if my mom is or isn't... Like when the weirdness happened she went to older females for advice, but it just shows humaness in general because she always was the rebel or black sheep of the family so she was seeking approval or validation, but my grandmother was definitely or at least had narcissistic tendencies. Like my mom would say she would immediately be mean after my grandpa would go to work, and if grandpa gave her money she'd "borrow" it back and if my mom asked for it turn it around like she's the mom etc etc - even if grandpa gave that to her in her hand for her. But my granny was an adult during the crack era which allegedly the government was putting drugs in certain black communities like corrupt officials to make money and then have free labor for the jail ... So anyway my granny was on drugs but she stopped with her last child ...She grew up in the civil Rights era like their were colored water fountains when she was a kid and she was from Alabama and its just a historical fact that during certain very heavy times in American history their were heavy drugs like heroin in the 20s if im not mistaken.... So anyway my grandparents actually broke up and it was such a scene and big deal and they would fight and I'm not saying my grandpa was perfect at all but my granny was crazy lol only age could stop her if she was in that mood,mind or attitude. But so my mom ran away at like 15 because my granny was a very hard person to deal with because love like giving love to her was met with either coldness or almost like being made fun of in a way like my mom would try and try but my granny never really treated her with love she would just get my mom to buy her stuff and then be mean again like it's hard to actually fully explain... My uncle picked my granny up, her Youngest kid and she threatened to shoot him and it really hurt his feelings and he stopped coming around... So it's like sometimes when people have parents like that it's easier to slip into the negative crazy behavior of who they said they'd never be. With my mom that's the case but anyway my granny called me fast and sided with the abuser and my mom it's like she never stood up for herself and it's like since I'm a different person and I'm an adult now and was a teen then it's hard for them to see their daughters as their flesh and bone offspring because of puberty and maturity. Like with my dad she had a crush on him since she was in middle school and she said all her friends told her she'd never be with him and she was and he tragically passed away and it was like super unbelievable to her like the worst thing that could happen so after that is when ig she became this classification... I never understood why my grandmother sided with the predator because she actually had 2 solid baby daddies for the most part although her and my uncles dad faught I believe more or harder than my grandpa and her... Like there was a family photo where she had a bruise but put makeup over it ... But my uncles dad has like 10 kids and my uncle has Alot of sisters so idk like after a while he stopped talking to my mom and aunt.. But when I say their dad is solid like my granny had sketchy friends during the drug phase and like the "respect your elders" rule would make it harder for kid's to stick up for themselves against abusers and bad influences and some fights were about her friends. My aunt would talk about being glad their stepdad would tell all those people to leave. My granny would crack ninjas in the face with them old school glass ashtrays, the heavy ones and tell dudes she had that fire on her so I'm accounting for my Granny's personality like I don't condone abuse or domestic violence
The pickmes are so evil, they are a popular villian trope in Mexican soap operas. The pickme’s will ruin the life of the female protagonist to get the man to marry her. They will even unalive people.
I always knew this ,when i was young i always had my standards and my pick me ex friends always think something is wrong with me. Men use those pick me women to hurt and use women and to lower our self worth to get what they want from us. The older i get the more i realize i dont want to be around women who are male obsessed. There is more to life than competing for men that dont like us anyway.
Same, Aside from work. I am not around them at all. Most of my friends are not even black women. Moreover they are confident women who are not male centered
When you think about the all the criminality against children, this statement is absolutely true due to centering men (ie., patriarchy). It’s not even the nature of the female species to allow such treachery to take place against other females let alone their offspring. The fact that animals know better speaks volumes.
Before a relative passed away she told me the deep dark secrets of her mother's hell. The mother lived with her elder sister and brother-in-law. When she was sixteen, her brother-in-law's brother came for a visit. Well educated, gainfully employed and engaged to a pure, god-fearing woman back home, shortly after his departure, it was discovered he (24) had left the sixteen-year-old very pregnant. The pick-me elder sister, convinced her husband that he should not involve his brother in the situation. She felt, it was best not to sully the reputation of a good black man. He had potential for wealth, a good marriage and to become an example for the BC. Her little sister was not going to miss that up. So, the sixteen-year-old had the baby. The man married his virgin and produced highly educated professions. To find out how much this woman suffered to raise her daughter still brings a tear to my eyes. That old bat was male centered and was part of a massive coverup. Back then the pick-mes were the reason children weren't safe. Especially young girls.
The tragedy of the pick-me is that she capes for bad men at the expense of her fellow women... but also at the expense of herself. She is an agent of the patriarchy, and yet these men will never view her as their equal. Many times they won't even pick her! How embarrassing to betray your sisters and align yourself with a group that doesn't even want you.
We don’t talk about these types of women enough. They’re the ones who raise the bad men we complain about. They’re also the ones who don’t hold themselves accountable for their behavior.
Yes. My sister is a pick me. Been with a bum for 10 years now. He leaves whenever he wants then comes right back in her life. Yet she cuts family off for no reason. It's weird. I feel for her daughters because soon she will treat them wrong too. She's he very male centered
Oh no a home w daughters a male a dad father should be home every night . What type man unless he’s working at them late night hours a man is home w his family how do I protect them ? Or how does a man sleep w out knowing his kids are asleep inside ?
My older sister is like this. Gave her abusive ex husband and countless no good boyfriends so much grace! But won't even speak to her sisters for years over the slightest infraction! Totally insane!🙄🙄🙄
Mine too. Been with hers over 30 years. Anything that can be done to a woman, he has done it to her times 5. I cut her off because he was trying to groom me from the time I was 10-35 and I kept telling her but she would ignore it.
I have a friend that was a police officer, his own brother was "|G|rapping his own daughter and it took DNA before the cop would even do something. the daughter was 13 when it happen and her own mother threw her under the bus. BUT DNA proved her right and HER UNCLE did finally come and arrest him. And he wanted to make sure it was a nice arrest and that his brother was taken care of. YEAH BEYOND EVIL and DISGUSTING. What DNA, THAT of HER CHILD that she gave birth too from her own father.
Chii-, and then there are those mothers that have the audacity to say that their daughters "seduced"their father's, when they are SAed by them... Saw a story of a woman claiming her little 11 year old girl seduced her father, she did everything to protect her monster of a husband... Urgh, that specific story has me raging just thinking about it.
My "DNA donor" was a corrupt cop and beat TF out of us as babies. It's a wonder I'm even here. He was also addicted to adult videos. My mom said she used to cry about why he was looking at "all those WW." Meanwhile, he was beating us kids. Now that I think about it, I NEVER heard her say she cried about him beating us!! She only left him because he cheated on her!
My first job I worked in a very male dominated company where I was only one of two women. We were so emotionally, verbally and psychologically abused by those men. Then to survive, that one other woman started bullying me, which scored her some pointd with the abusive men. When I finally found a new job and was about to leave, she was really upset cause she knew that she would now be the sole target of those men's bullying and abuse.
I had a pick-me roommate do the same thing. I left cuz I wasn’t going to put up with the bs anymore, and she became the target. The gag is, she was always a target cuz our classmates would always talk bad about her when she wasn’t around. They just acted like they were her friends when she was, and even then they would do so loosely. Being a pick-me is a disease fr. Makes you dumb af and everything.
Yes. It is always his mother, or some long suffering ignorant girlfriend or wife. These kind constantly catch him cheating or lying, they force themselves to think that all men are a certain way- so they just endure. The kind who brag about always being a man’s go to at the end of the night- once he’s finished in other women throughout the day or week. Smh
I was a bit of a pick me. I've slowly moved away from the mindset over time. Not quick enough by a long shot. I didn't have the knowledge to know what was going on back then, and I've only learned about it in increments over time. I had a lot of childhood trauma that lead to low self esteem, and a poor sense of what a good relationship was. Every time I've realized I've done pick me behavior it was always something I regretted, and harmed myself, and sometimes the people I love. Thanks to these types of videos I've learned so much more recently, and realized that I hadn't recognized all the mistakes I'd made because of that mindset. When I look back it's hard to believe how bad it was, and just as hard to realize that even though I had made improvements I was still creating so many problems in my life because of it. If you're a pick me please realize you're going to look back on the decisions you've made, and you are going to regret so many things.
Kudos to you for taking the steps to grow. Looking clearly at your past mistakes and shortcomings is never easy, let alone actually doing the work to do better going forward. Many people aren’t strong enough to do that, so be proud of yourself. The progress you’ve made will snowball into more and more forward motion, and I’m manifesting the good karma you’re creating in your life to come back around to you. Support, recognition and well wishes 😇😇
Every woman in my family is a pick me. I don't play with women who need men to validate themselves. I don't deal with lesbians who have toxic partners either. They're the same as toxic men. If a person mistreated me I'm out. Don't matter wtf it is. I'm gay so I've seen this on both sides. It's a no all the way around.
Thank you for being honest, cuz I’ve seen too many comments acting like this is only a hetero experience when every sexuality has these types of issues, and it all needs to be called out.
These pickme's move on to women when they run out of men. So the toxic partner is often the exact same woman that has cycled through all the men you know. I see it on Facebook constantly from old heauxs from highschool. (I'm 40. They're getting into their most desperate era.) They were not a bit lesbian until they needed a new way to not realize they are the problem.
@@tiahnarodriguez3809 i appreciate the honesty as well. I literally seen a lesbian who was in a toxic abusive relationship with her girlfriend. Her face was messed up smh
I wonder how male identified lesbians fare in relationships. Religious male centered views could also be the culprit. Patriarchy affects them too, they are not exempt.
We sure do! They play either position- side, “main”, wife or live in girlfriend. They “confront” women on behalf of “their men” all day long, etc it’s just a mess out here .
Majority. What makes it so pathetic is why the hell would any woman bend over backwards to be chose by the worst demographic of bum in existence? Like damn yall really doing the most over fucking losers who treat women the worst in general.
I honestly think that’s the reason why bw suffer so much from poverty. It’s their pickmeism that makes them poor. If bw did away with religion and other forms of male worshiping the black race (male and female) would not be in the state that they are in. It’s not racism we need to fight, it’s pickmeism. Being a pickme is the greatest sin imo.
That's 98% of the BW are pick mes and desperadas. Many are in denial and think they are not, I suppose there are levels to it. Interesting.I always find other black women online Saying this, but I never see them in person.Or have these types of conversations offline at all. 😅
What get me is, all these women bashing podcasts--in particular, the bashing of single women. These men are hallarious. All these pickmeshas out here they could be in wonderful submissive relationships and marriages with and be on podcasts with talking about how wonderful their relationships and marriages are and teaching other couples how to achieve the same but they instead spend their time finding things to criticize happily single women about. Single, it's a problem. Single and child-free, problem Single and raising her kids, problem Single and traveling, problem Single and hit the wall, problem Single rich auntie, problem Single entrepreneur, problem Single with own house, problem Single and celibate, problem Single and get some if she wants it, problem Single with 🐻 and 🐈⬛ problem Why is it so hard for them to keep us out their mouths???? Why can't they go get the pickmes and get tf on with their lives??? Why is that such a difficult task???
Single and virgin, problem. Single and asexual, problem. Single and asexual and virgin and child-free and 4B, problem. All of what you mentioned, plus them having a problem with women who actually give them what they want made me stop caring a very, very long time ago. Because I hate math, but I can do it really well when a situation doesn't add up.
Oh my goodness, I had to leave the church I was attending because it was too much. There was this girl who was so infatuated with a guy who clearly didn't care about her. I had to cut ties with her and the whole church. From day one, I could see the issues. For example, I met a guy at the church, and we had a nice four-hour conversation, but I wasn't attracted to him. The next day, he called me "mysterious" because I hadn't shared my past traumas with him. I was shocked when he said, "Trust me, you can tell me." That was a huge red flag for me. After that, I never set foot in that church again. Girlies, if you see the first red flag, leave. Trust your instincts.
My mom standing up for my dad still for physically abusing me as a child, demanding I forgive him. The women closest to you can be enablers to your trauma unfortunately.
It really is sad. I can't imagine being that desperate for a man's validation and attention. Something is very wrong with women who internalize misogyny to that degree.
my mom was absolutely a pick me and she put me through a lot of terrible shit in her attention seeking pursuits of male attention but it really hit me hard when i was 17 and being sexually harassed by a grown man, my mom didn't even know. This was the only time I told her about an adult man sexually harassing me because she never protected me or helped me as a kid and i had lost all faith in her at age 8. After I made the HUGE MISTAKE of telling her this man was harassing me, she wanted to dress up in cute outfits and go to the mall together. I was a dumb neglected kid so i thought she genuinely had an interest in spending time with me, not with me while looking at her phone the other time or not while some other man was there. She fucking invited the adult man there and spent the entire time pointing out my boobs to him loudly and tearing me apart and my outfit and my makeup and how I was dressed so slutty. I was wearing her old clothes because she never bought me clothes but always had money to buy herself clothes and she had no problem with what I was wearing when I left the house, only when she dropped the bomb that she had invited me there. When i was justifiably upset and we were driving home, she told me i was spoiled and ungrateful and I should have been happy we got to go to the mall that day, I told her i was mad she invited him, she played oblivious, and i cried that night throwing the clothes I wore that day in the garbage. Never let a pickme near you
My sister used to be a Pick-me. She has changed a little now because she has been burned by men a lot but that girl it was like she couldn't live without a man. She literally brought a Hobo-sexual into her home on her little son. Then that man brought in his mother, his nephew and another man he used to live with. Then they all set their eyes on her little son and just wanted to get rid of him out house. The man suggested she should send her 11 year old son away to military school, and let me tell you, that little boy was a good kid not the type for military school, but she agreed and they were walking around looking for such school. The man's mother just took a set on the little boy that even the man's nephew had to try and comfort him and my sister did nothing all she told her son was the world is tough so he needs to be tough. We tried to get him from her and the only time we did get him for a little bit was when the man caused her to become homeless. And she still stayed with him. Her son has even said one of the men was a ped○ph!|e and when we ask how he knows that he won't respond. We suspect one of them probably touched him inappropriately but he refuses to open up about it. The things she put up with just to keep that man and nobody could tell her anything because she's so rude. And before him it was another man whom she was supporting financially becuase she just has to have a man. Right now, she has lost her son emotionally, he's numb to her and she's wondering why.
I agree about them being like men in a women's body in that predatory way like toxic masculinity like obsessed with men and benefiting men but evily like it crosses boundaries
I just ran into a live of shalakemia. Phew! I feel like I need to cleanse my feed. The pickme and mammie vibes! Blaming women for everything. Still saying women are keeping children from BM when we have a whole court system. One man came up and said he loves what shes doing and you should have seen the smile. Her next comment was "I feel like I have a village" 🤣🤣🤣Mind you, all the men that came up were like yeah! Yeah! Keep fighting for us...women fighting for you🥴 The ones in the comments were like "I'm getting my passport. Lol. How LOW does black women's self esteem have to be to wake up? I had to leave. Would be too exhausting trying to wake them up when all the facts are all over social media. They are living under the mammie mountain.
She is horrible. There are other black women and a mixed woman- can’t remember their names, who have RU-vid channels and social media sites dedicated to destroying black women. They praise black men and the comment sections are always horrible. I don’t understand how these women can even begin to think that the male audience they cater too actually cares about them- or sees their humanity. It’s scary.
My mom is a pick me it was hell she still holds no accountability if you call out what she did she will say she already apologized and or say she doesn’t remember
Well question if you've ALREADY spoke on it why are you STILL bringing it up! If you don't forgive her then tell her that but constantly bringing it up is pointless..
Mine has started to take accountability, but she’ll say the same thing as yours most times. I caught her one time though when I asked her to explain specifically how she hurt me, and she was like “must I explain, I already said sorry” with an ashamed look on her face, so she remember she’s just not brave enough to say it out loud. I think this is the case for most pick-me moms, but they’ll either acknowledge it to a degree, or keep acting like they did no wrong.
Your mom sounds like my mom. She'll claim she doesn't remember when her children bring up abuses she's done. That, or she'll say we're "disrespecting" her.
@@LadyAstarionAncunin well I remember every single name, insult, nasty look, shove and push, everything my step dad has done to me. My mum can forget and play dumb if she wants to.
My pickme cousin tried to set me up with her boyfriend because they decided they wanted me to be part of their “throuple”. This is my first cousin btw. Sick ssa. Her boyfriend ended up groping me one day when I was hanging out with them, right in front of her. When I called them out about it, she denied trying to set me up and defended her pervert of a “boyfriend”. I don’t speak to her anymore. Last I heard they were engaged.
He’s going to have fun forcing her to pick up women for him. And that’s actually scary because he is likely dangerous and will force her to get those victims
@@AmberColeman-gq1wn So many predators and traffickers use women. That's why I don't trust them. I don't trust random little kids either because they'll use them too.
I agree, very dangerous. We need to stay as far away as possible from them. You are always in danger of some man attacking you if you hang around pick me˙s.
I appreciate this video, because I’ve always been around “pick me” women and never really knew it. I’ve had some of these situations happen to me, knew something was weird about it, but could never quite put my finger on what was wrong with these women. These friendships never lasted, and I never quite understood why. Now I know.
Right 😒 most descriptions in these comments are not cases of pick me's weak women maybe emotionally underdeveloped but not pick me people use words they don't know the definition of
How can you be a pick-me when you’re the one calling out a pick-me? 💀. I bet pick-me’s were calling you that to signal to men in the comments. I’ve seen it happen in Lauren Southern’s comment section.
Pearl is the ultimate feminist for real when you think about it, and it's hilarious none of these pick mes and the men can't see it. She's single don't need no man, owns her own business, has an argumentative masculine personality, owns her own property, and does whatever she wants. Chick is a feminist....the morph we didn't really foresee, but a feminist still.
Realizing every example of a woman in my life on my mom's side were/pick me women was hard to swallow. I definitely had to deconstruct myself for fine the real me.
In the mid/late90's I was around 19 or 20. (I'm old) I got left behind at a club that my friend convinced me to go to on a Thursday night. She left me with no ride to go hook up with a guy she met 3 hours before. I begged her to drop me off first and the guy was impatient so she said I can't and walked off with him to HER car (he didn't even have one). I was in tears trying to figure out how to get home. I ran into one of my brother's friends who was also leaving with a lady, and I started begging him (I knew he had a car) and he didn't want to, but the lady he was with basically berated him into it. He wanted to still get with her, so the only way was to drop me off. He was NOT happy about his delay, but he took me home. I stop talking to that "friend" for a few weeks, but like a dummy I did let her back in but NEVER that close again. (sidenote: my brother's friend did not get with that lady that night, she apparently didn't like how he didn't want to take me home and it dried up her womanly parts on the ride and she also got dropped home. I only know because he called my house the next day and told me off and I laughed at him, then he hung up in my face. He wasn't that mad because he was over a few days later and it was as cool as it ever was between him and me.)
My mom has a friend in her 60s that's a pick me. The married this raggedy man who lives in her house but doesn't pay half the bills. He also doesn't like her hanging out with her friends aways from the house where he can't supervise. Before they met she only wanted to do something if men were gonna be there. It's sad.
I dated a guy years ago whose Mom was a pick-me. She was jealous of me and our relationship smh ☹️. Like my family said I dodged a silver bullet because the relationship wasn’t meant to be.
Right on que as my mum has fallen out with me again for daring to stand up for her bully of a husband. He’s not my dad btw my dad would never speak to women the way he does. She might take his abuse but I’m not taking it, if it means I don’t see my mum I guess so be it. I have a daughter and if a man spoke badly to her he’d be out of my home in a flash. It’s upsetting but the reality is some women have more love for their man than their kids.
My mom is definitely a pick me, she always needed a man in her life, we had constant strange men comming and going from our house over the years. I can count atleast 6 of her boyfriends that have been in me, my siblings and my mothers life, one of them is of course my physically abusive father. As we know statistically that bringing in strange men increases the chances of children getting SA and experiencing domestic violence. It didn't come to me as a surprise when one of my siblings told me that they where molesed by one of my mothers many boyfriends Let me add that they where 11 years old when this happened Not only that but me and my siblings where subjected to the horrors of domestic violence which also isnt much of a surprise As we grew older me and my siblings have become diagnosed with anger issues, anxiety and depression. My mother looks at one of my drug addicted siblings in confusion, as if she has no idea what went wrong Not only that but my mother was almost killed by one of her boyfriends, its honestly astonishing how blind these pick mes are. Even after nearly dying she got a new boyfriend a few months later, who by no surprise was a narcissist
@@WellBeing999 Unfortunately yes, which is why she had me and my siblings as she didn't belive in abortion. Because of that she brought us into her many abusive relationships and poverty. Soooo f@ck pro lifers
Finally someone calling out these women! My grandmother told me not to ignore my stalker whos in jail and keeps sending letters because “he may need help”. I never seen her as strong but yes the complete opposite. My other grandmother was the strong one with class and i regret not spending more time with her.
Do no allow pickme women around your significant other, your other friend’s significant other, married men in your family, etc Even your own father. Some of them are desperate and longing to be chosen. They already have a story in their head.
I got in danger trying to help my pick me friend out of a bad situation. She needed help moving out of her abusive bf's house. So of course she called me because I'm mean. He came home as we were leaving. I shoved her in my car and we left with the quickness. But he was looking around in his car after I shoved her in for I'm assuming a gun. He then proceeded to harass me via phone afterwards. I had to change my number. Absolute nightmare.
Yes, this was my own mother, the great irony is she even humbled herself to gain the attention of males & they despised her. She rejected me because I was a female and I refused to subscribe to her foolishness subsidising a grown man.
I never knew the word for it, other than being a psycho woman. Never in my life would i think I'd be a victim to my pick me mother in my 20's, but i was! She was a good mom and an even better grandma before she met this man. The long story short is she had my dad leave her when i was like 8 yrs old, and she never got married or really had a bf until i was already married with kids. So i kinda understood her wanting to be with him all the time, and why she gave less time fo family and friends, but they get married and everything. My dad told me to watch out for that man. I thought he was just being jealous that his ex lady had a man. No he was right! My mom had left me in the house wirh him to go to get pizza, and i bent over to get a bottle of water, and he got all close and bumped my backside with his front side. I wiggled out from the fridge area, and i thought, that was strange! Maybe he just got too close! Then on Easter i went to leave. Everyone was in the backyard with the party. Im trying to wrangle my 2 toddlers, and carry food. So mom sends him to help me. He finally comes up to my window. You're not gonna say bye. So i hugged him out of kindness, and he tried to kiss me square in the mouth. I kept my mouth shut because i knew my mom would believe him over me anyways. Time goes on and his stuff escalated and escalated. My husband went to jail, and my tire was popped. I had nobody else to call but her. She sends me with him to get a tire with him. So he goes to their house to "get tools". I had to pee. So I'm thinking he's looking for tools. I'll be ok. Nope, he proceeds to pin me on their bed. I tried to tell him that hey i love my mom. I'm married, and get off me or I'm gonna kick you with my knee. Get up and quit playing with me. He got up thank God. He told me she wouldn't believe me so shut up about it. Finally time went by and i made sure to never be alone with him. He got to yelling at me one day with her acting like he was my dad. I just burst like a balloon and told him to not try to act like my dad when he tried to be my man last week. She didn't believe me. She cut off ties with me except to call social services when i lost my apartment because my hubby was in jail. They literally took my kids and they gave them to them for a year. I finally got my kids back when my husband got out and we got a new place to live, but i knew from then on that she didnt believe anything but him. So now years later after several more family members complained about same thing they're still "happily married"! Makes me sick to know that shes chosen a man over everything, but i guess it is what it is! Really sad though! I would never do my daughter like that! Not ever!
My mom tried to raise me as a pick me but it didn’t work. I had a natural distaste/distrust for men and loved other women. Mostly, she lacked self awareness - I saw how terrible her life was. Always vying for male attention with zero strong female friendships or community. Why would I want that for myself?
I remember being newly 18 and moving to the city from a small country town and my niece had and still has to this day, a live in boyfriend, who was abusing her Daughters. My eldest niece told me one night what was happening and I told the neighborhood gossip because I knew she would sound the alarm. The next day I had to pack up all of my things and move out with nowhere to go because my niece chose her abusive womanizing boyfriend over the well being and safety of her Kids and me.
I have a niece that was SA’d by a friends dad when she was younger. My sister told her not to tell her dad because of what he would do to the neighbor. Because she didn’t want him to hurt the neighbor and go to jail. So my niece,like so many other young girls had to suffer in silence. This was years ago and she still doesn’t have healthy boundaries with males and because of her mom,and she suffers with mental health issues because of her mom and dad
At the end there you started describing my mother unfortunately 😂 that's why i call my brothers princesses in the house they dont know how to cook yet they eat the most. Me and my older sister have been really put through that baptism of fire to prepare for those imaginary husbands.It's very interesting how she cares more for an imaginary man than her own daughters who are right infront of her. Thank God that I have learnt to not only decenter men but my mother aswell otherwise it would be a very miserable existence😂😂😂
I literally can not be around my cousin. Anytime we are out she’s seeking male attention. If she see guys in a store she’ll get loud so they can notice her. Pulling up at the gas station if she see guys she’ll turn up her music and jump out the car and start twerking. Mind you we are in our 40s😩. Mind you she’s already paying two car notes her and her ex’s. She met a guy who just got out of prison. She went after him, he had nice muscles. She moved him in bought him a challenge and proceeded to tattoo his name 3 different places on her body. After 5 years of him cheating she put him out and took her car back. Now she’s back on the prowl. She can not be single.
My mom was/is a pick-me. Sacrificed her relationship w/ me for a man. Been that way my whole life. When I turned 18 and left, never went back home. -my man dead said to me “I never got married bc I was afraid that you (me, her daughter) would sleep with my man.” I had to be like 18 or 21 at the time. Haven’t looked at her the same since. -everything said in this video is spot on MY MOM !! - I even saw sprouts of it from my Aunts as well.
I have NEVER understood a woman who would blame a daughter, who has been molested by the woman’s husband, second husband, or boyfriend, and even turn her out of the house. As if that girl hasn’t gone through enough trauma with the SA. I’ve always said that if I had a daughter, a child I gave birth to and raised for a number of years, and she was molested by my husband or boyfriend, I’d simply unalive him. A man who would do that doesn’t deserve to continue to live. Yeah, I know I’d probably go to prison, but ‘blood before bros’. I’d try to make it at least look like I had caught him in the act and I was trying to save her. And I think a jury of my peers would be a pretty poor example of humanity if they found me guilty for protecting my daughter. And I’d try to have my lawyer pick a judge who has a daughter around the same age as my daughter. I wouldn’t want to leave her alone (by going to jail), but at least she’d always know her mother loved her and had her back. Just a thought. I couldn’t really know what I’d do in that position. Thankfully, I’ll never be in that position as I don’t have any children.
Yesss, there was always some covert incest vibes. I knew my mother saw me as sexual competition even amongst my dad.... thankfully he was always more of a physical/mental abuse kind of guy.
There is no age limit for pick mes. I’m 53 and living in 🇲🇽 and went out with a woman I thought was cool to a few bars. She disappeared multiple times in the evening, if a dude glanced at her she would make a beeline towards them and to top off the weirdness of the night a dude, little person in a Chucky costume who she didn’t know but was hugging up on her kept following us around and when she would disappear or be talking to some other dude would tell me in Spanish how much he loved her. She also went off to smoke 🌿 with some random dudes she didn’t know. Never again! I thought she was cool but when I think about she had just broken up her boyfriend so the first few times we hung out I didn’t see how boy cray she was. Talk about dangerous!
A lot of male serial killers had a girlfriend or wife that accompanied them and helped cover up their crimes. I noticed the pattern. Bad men are a problem enough, but women need to all stick together and help other women!
Maybe it's just me, but I've seen all these traits from past so-called friends. Even in some women now The more I listen, the more dangerous and scary it sounds but still I'm sure majority of women are a pick me in some kind of way, excluding abuse I'd rather not use such a light term as pick me for those acts horrific abusers
I agree with most of this, except for people saying "not all men". I make sure to say unhealthy men when I am speaking about these issues. Because that's more accurate, and I can't be accused of being sexist. When I say "unhealthy men" instead of "men", I am not implying that all men behave this way because they are men. Or that somehow being a man makes them behave this way. They behave this way because they are unhealthy, damaged individuals. It's wrong to speak about women as if they are all the same. It's wrong to do that with men also. It's about accuracy, not about appeasing men.
17:04 lol, so true ,so i had a pickme ex-besties , but i was dumb we were in college first year , she was pretty and charming ,all male in our class smitten by her, and one day one less familiar male groups asked her out and she begged me to accompanied her ,i declined her so she declined as well bc she wasn't comfy being alone with many boys,then the next day and next 2 days she kept on asking me, so i agreed bc i felt bored as well. We went out to eat at one eatery that kind of highend but in area less crowded ,no transportation crossed there at 10 in the night, she then get a ride by one of the male and she left me there without nobody give me offer of ride and at those time there's no online uber or whatsoever ,i was sooooo shocked ,hurt and feel betrayed, she didn't even spared a minute to ask the same guy to gave me a ride or nothing , so i begged another guy on the same college class i knew to just drop me a bit bc i cannot find a ride and it's too dark here being nobody can drive me , luckily he was quite nice ,despite grumbling he still dropped me. Since that day i never saw her the same and our friendship started to crumble bc she kept doing kind of the same stuff by pushing me to fend herself from guys that chase her but she didn't want...i was a fool to think such a person as my bestie 😂
Did you stalk her first? Follow her? Contact her on behalf of the cheating baby daddy? I know that often times main chicks who are slaves to “ their men” go after the other women they catch the man talking too and are surprised when the women defend themselves. I definitely don’t know your situation but I know a trifling man is always at the center.
@AmberColeman-gq1wn YOU MUST BE THE PICKMESHA🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 KEEP that ninja...best thing I could have ever did was LET GO...Ninja still try sniff my a$$ stay on that side....IM DOING MY THANG!!! Still call my for help🤣🤣🤣🤣 F☆UCK ON!!!!!
Yikes to that story of the ladies at the club. Yes, her friend does sound like a big pickme. But we also need to take accountability for our own actions. Save the enjoyment of getting tossed for your parent's NYE party or when you are in your own home with trusted friends and family. She reflected on the situation the next day and realised that she could have been hurt. Just because something is not our fault doesn't mean it's not our problem. Consider all of the possibilities of misfortune that could have befallen her.
The way that first girl made 1,000 mistakes, then blamed her pick me friend is wild. Ya'll still getting blackout drunk at the club, then taking rides home from strangers... at ya'll big age?!?
i work in healthcare and theres alottttt of pick mes around whenever the doctors come around, its sooo cringey to watch. They are sooo desperateeeee (Wearing tighttttt scrubs, having a fullll face of makeup, lashes, hair extensions, I mean this is healthcare girl your hair could be caught up in all types of things... it makes me nervous for them hahaha)
My Sister is a pick me woman at 61 years old and was on a mission to turn me into one as well! Thank God I finally woke up before I lost everything! 😢 I haven’t spoken to her in several months and I don’t plan to. Realizing that she groomed me into this mentality since the time I was 12 years old is so earth shattering because she is twenty years older than me! She is now on her second divorce in twenty years time and I’ve been married the length of her two failed marriages combined! I had no idea that she hated my happiness so much!
I got threatened like my life over a guy who was abusing me physically because she liked him so she stuck up for him and yeah I never seen something so foul by an older woman ..
You love and respect yourself a lot more when you’re not in competition with anyone. It’s just about being your best self instead of being better than anyone else.
It's not only the abusers who are the problem, it's also the enablers and those who encourage /ignore and/or participates in toxic behaviours are to be held responsible as well
Bruh 😮😮😮😮I have a lot of dangerous pick me in my life they've destroyed my life I didn't realise it before 😢😢😢😢 I wish I have the courage to block my mum for good
@@soundcityeducation6692 I think because I have a daughter it makes me feel worse, I can’t imagine letting a man abuse her, I love her and want to protect her. I wonder what’s wrong with me that my mum doesn’t feel that way. I was just in the way of her relationship really.
@@shanicrystal8671 nothing is wrong with you!!!! You are a mother now so you know no mother should treat her daughter like seriously I know how you feel. Just be that good example for your daughter that's what I do
these comments give mean girls vibes sorry!! I read the stories and most of them don't even come across as a pick me, maybe women with emotional issues, but to say that someone is a pick me because they are weak to leave a partner or because they want men around them shows that half of yall here don't even know what a pick me means
Your comment just sounds a bit unhinged- that of a true mean girl. I’m reading the comments and the stories these women are laying out are horrible. It’s not just about some women refusing to leave an abusive man- it’s deeper than that. You are probably a pick- me, one who has endangered other women for a man’s validation or will eventually. I suggest you slow down and read the comments versus becoming defensive .
@@AmberColeman-gq1wn girl cool down I didn't say they weren't terrible stories!!! but most of them weren't pick me stories and you can spare me your whole story!! look up the definition of pick me's.
@@AmberColeman-gq1wn women are each other's greatest enemy!! really ridiculous for your information, I would never put another woman in danger and certainly not for a fucking man. but I can certainly recognize a situation if it is a pick me situation or if it concerns women who have been damaged.😒
