Law & Order: SVU - Two Young Lives Torn Apart (Episode Highlight) 

Or better yet make both people who are doing this on the internet need to sign waivers that they consent otherwise the females can use it as a rape whistle and get away with it.

Did the boy say yes to the sex? Did the girl ask his consent?

@@loremipsum3610 both parties had unclear communication when it came to consent. I can't remember the episode exactly but neither one had a definite yes or no before having sex. There was a lot of assumption between both parties and the parents of both kids made things worse

@@loremipsum3610 Chris' friends were making fun of him for not having any names on the wall for their "cherry picking" club. So, he asked her to the dance. They went to the dark room together (a known hookup spot) and she was the kind of girl who was eager to do things to get Chris to like her. I believe she told him to slow down ,and when he tried to touch her under her dress she said "Not down there." So she did not give consent, and she seemed to freeze a bit and not know what to do when he touched her anyway and tried to have sex with her.

@@cyn6123 her parents tried charging the son with rape but technically he didn't rape her. And his parents tried charging her with something but I can't remember

Ikr.

Iconic !!!!

He’s a goddamn hero

FRANCO PEREZ - lol don’t yuck my yums

Barba ate this episode 💥🤛🏽

There's a grey area with this. "Minor" is such a subjective term under the law, as minors can be charged as adults in some cases. There is a question though of consent and whether or not such incidents were consensual. Clearly both individuals felt differently than the courts and their parents.

orlandobabe No he didn't.

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orlandobabe no he didnt he didnt even have sex with her. He lied and put his name on the wall

I AGREEE👍🏿👍🏿😁

Very true point

Corny

Indeed true

She wasn’t raped.

The lines aren't blurred. Yes means yes . No means no. And if you're confused simply ask. It's so simple

@@lwilliamsnoc um no. she didn't say no or anything. she just went along with it.

@@elisejackson2854 but did he ask permission... No so he's still wrong. Goodbye

@@lwilliamsnoc It's actually not that simple. If someone doesn't say yes, it doesn't mean yes. But people still are like "hE/sHe nEvEr saiD 'nO'." I wish it were simpler, but there are sick people who don't understand basic consent.

@@ronisawyer5371 , I agree with you, but here is the reality. People in relationships have already said yes. What is obviously being missed here is that the two teens (Abby and Chris) actually were in a relationship. The parents turned this into a crime. Yes, Chris could have asked.. but the truth is, the line was blurred by the pressure of the parents.. not what Chris did or didn't ask. High minded ideals end up not translating well when emotions get involved.

The only thing is SHE NEVER SAID NO…. Like geez..

@@baseball3106 that’s why I put it, because we need to learn to say it

Number 3, I couldn't agree more, too bad he left

@@endah6958 amen, he’s my favorite ADA

Even as a kid, when we were given permission slips in 5th grade, I was baffled the parents were even allowed to have the option to say no to me learning sex ed if they wanted to. Why wouldn't you want your kid to learn about themselves? I thought it was so dumb that parents could deny their kids of learning something so important when puberty was only a year or two away at minimum. I never officially had the talk. The closest thing was asking is what sex ed entailed. My mom had the best attitude. It was a need to know basis. I started asking around 4th grade how old you had to be before puberty started. 5th grade was the bulk of the questions though. Turns out that sex ed class and talking with my mom came just in time too because a few months later I start developing, and had to hide it with big shirts the last couple months of the school year. What she didn't say was how sore they'd be as they grew. Early on I didn't think they would so imagine my surprise when I lean over into the washing machine and put pressure on them. _F-cking hurt, like hell._ that's when I asked her if that was normal.

Watch the tv series Hannibal, same actor, eats quite a bit.

we talking bout Barba not Chilton. lol jk.

Ianus Raúl's mouth, his lips, are just so sexy. Raúl eating is one way of seeing his lips in action. 💖

Just discovered Rafael Barba character in 2020! Found out he first appeared in Season 14, so I’m slowly devouring each episode. Question: Is there anybody hotter on the planet? Answer: No I agree, more lip action is required

Skythos girls need to learn too. Everyone needs better communication skills about sex and what they want. Unfortunately there is lack of education about sex and boundaries. Here needs to be a clear consent between to adults. Plus the involvement of alcohol blurs the line. Schools need to teach more then just abstain from sex.

What is there to understand other than she was NOT raped?

Yea imagine there are people that think calling a girl pretty is rape. Weird times.

@@heretic0001 well, she said ‘slow down’, ‘not down there’ and never said ‘yes’ so uh.... I know I wouldn’t continue after hearing that. Would you?

@@loesjuhb Slow down does not mean stop.

She never said no….

The Great Hufflepuff he is going to prison meanwhile she I going to her house and friends

He didn’t go to prison, the only thing that will happen is his prints/ DNA going on the register. It’s been a while since I saw this episode, but if I remember correctly that was the same plea deal that Barba offered the boy so they wouldn’t have to take this to court- which the parents did not accept

@@dashernation3343 Yep, but he should have gone to prison though he was guilty and trying to cover up by dressing as a nerd and being all sweet on the stand

@@KSHITIJA_SAMANT why should he go to prison it was a A Misunderstanding

I agree in a way. I think teens should see this episode, but see it with parent(s)/guardian(s). These conversations should ideally start at home. It would be good, though, to maybe see it at school too so teens can ask questions, have a discussion alongside their peers.

@@HarvestMoon2049 preach, I started to dislike how older people groom teens

"Drawing lines for sexual engagement is a must nowadays." sad isn't it? Men avoid meaningful relationships more and more because now, more often than not, they are like walking around a minefield, one wrong step and your life is over.

@@skotnica93 I wouldn’t limit it to men. Educating everyone, regardless of gender or sexual orientation, is necessary. If potential victims aren’t taught to stand up for themselves and protect themselves, verbally and physically, they become targets. I was taught to yell “Fire!” if I was attacked because my screams were likely to mean nothing otherwise; they would be ignored. When in a relationship, both parties should set clear boundaries, so there is clear communication. When someone wants to change the boundaries, it should be discussed verbally in advance. This protects both parties from unwanted advances and accusations of misconduct. If everyone learns the basics of verbal communication and respect for other people, especially those one has a personal relationship with, everyone is safe. Want to avoid false accusations? Learn what you need to do to defend yourself; you’re the potential victim. Maybe keep your office door open and take notes during all interactions with other people. In a relationship, that might be in the form of creating accountability of the relationship boundaries through each person bringing a friend to lunch and both of you share your relationship boundaries, then each updates when something makes them uncomfortable (such as “she’s always trying to sneak her hand higher up my thigh” or “he asked me again today if we could change the boundaries even though he said he wouldn’t for another two weeks”). Then, if the boundaries are broken, those friends are prepared to mediate if the couple wants to save their relationship or defend if things get messy. Another way to protect oneself is to not have sex and stay in public places when beginning a relationship. Go on double dates. Meet the friends/family in order to confirm the person’s character. Women often have a friend that they tell where and when they are going on a date, someone who can pick them up if the date goes south, someone they check in with several times throughout an evening. I think everyone should do the same thing. Sex is often a motivator to have a relationship, but if you want a long term, safe relationship, build trust and understanding (with lots of clear communication) first. Learn what sexual harassment is and it’s many forms. (Btw, cat-calling is sexual harassment, it’s just normalized by society.) Object when you see it, even if it’s just a polite, “excuse me, can we please change the subject?” Or “please remove your hand from her back, it’s making me uncomfortable.” Not objecting is enabling it. Sexual harassment creates a toxic environment where sexual misconduct is acceptable, which includes rape and false accusations. If we don’t address the root of the problem, a lack of sexual boundaries that are clearly communicated in our society as a whole, and in each specific sector of life (professional/workplace, among friends, in public transportation/locations, at bars/clubs, in a romantic relationship, etc.). The law gives the overarching rules that stand wherever you are. From there, determine what your personal boundaries are, what you’re okay with someone doing to you and what you’re not. Then educate yourself on what others in a particular setting consider appropriate, holding the law as the low bar. For example, some workplaces have rules against sexual relationships between coworkers. Communicate clearly when situations arise. For example, don’t just start rubbing up against someone on the dance floor, ask them to dance. Know what typical body language means “no” and respect others’ personal space. In most cases, women already do these things because sexual harassment and rape are so common. Men are less likely to learn these things because they don’t see the need or they were never taught these things. Potential victims have to be taught to protect themselves. Potential offenders need to be taught what is unacceptable and held accountable. Everyone is responsible for teaching both, since in theory, we are all potential victims and offenders.

The word no, should be all that is required.

I disagree, he went the distance that was needed.

He tried to plead it out and then afterward said it was always a murky case. If it had truly been up to him this case wouldn’t have even gone to trial.

Same. I avoided dating in high school like the plague, even at that age I didn't want anything short-term or to play around. I found a man who listens to me and communicates with me, which I'm mighty thankful for.

Me

@@nohemi6899 And how have things turned out since you first met him?

@@VSaber365 I met him 6-7 years ago and have been together for that long. We're engaged and planning to get married next year!

I hope he’s someone who’s more than willing to fight for you.

Not me, it is ridiculous how this is a temptation. Idk how people do thsi

@FRANCO PEREZ how is he innocent????

@FRANCO PEREZ no. He forcefully put his hands inside her.

@FRANCO PEREZ no but you can hear it haha

FRANCO PEREZ literally in the episode it goes over that. The fact that the boy said he didnt know means for a fact that he didnt hear a yes. Its a fact that despite that he continued to sexually advance, which is sexual abuse. Its that simple. Hes not innocent hes just selfish. He took a lack of answer to be what he wanted to get what he wanted.

Casey Novak was better

@@mastermonarch she told her favorite prosecutor, not who was better. I Loved Novak,but Barba is better.

he didn't rape her though. they just both went along with it.

This was probably the most stupid comment I have ever heard

If you're a minor, then you're a minor. These two people were teenagers (minors) so people are going to call and refer to them as kids bc the law says that they aren't adults. However, teenagers do know right from wrong. I agree that their actions have consequences but at the end of the day they're under 18 so people will continue to call them kids.

S9metimes parents do thwir bedt and their kids choose to follow the crowd: why should the parents be blamed for their kids' actions (all the time)?

Worst take ever

How many romance scenes in movies, tv shows books or whatever can you name where both characters are constantly asking each other if something is ok and answering that with yes? Normally such scenes contain a lot of non verbal communication and that is where everything gets complicated. So at least in the way romance is portrayed in pop culture it often does not teach „yes means yes“ but only „no means no“. And that is where many young people learn what is typical behavior in such situations.

No wonder people aren't having as much sex these days. That's not how normal human beings act in romantic situations. Maybe in Tumblr autism land, but not reality.

@@icemachine79 consent is more important than gratification of any kind

icemachine79 people are having a normal amount of sex, and it’s normal you just don’t communicate with your partners? I always do

@@katc2040 No, they're not. www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2018/12/the-sex-recession/573949/ www.wsj.com/articles/public-health-puzzle-young-people-having-less-sex-contracting-more-stds-11571391000 www.washingtonpost.com/business/2019/03/29/share-americans-not-having-sex-has-reached-record-high/ As far as the rest, your assumption that I "don't communicate" with my partners is just plain silly. If you have to make constant verbal inquiries of your partner as to whether or not you have consent for a specific action then your partner is likely partnering up with someone else as we speak.

Being told to slow down is a sign that you need to slow down. Being told to stop means you stop.

Honestly

well women need to learn that silence is legally consent. women need to be aware that they cannot mean yes when they say no and then wonder why the gets confused. men are very simple.

Such a good point! I’m 31 and what my parents think still takes a toll.

They didn't the parents did

Rapist defender, but who knows you might need him someday when you are accused of rape

binkyboy9 yeah for real what episode and what season was this again?

Season 17, Episode 12. 'A Misunderstanding'

Omg the judge is Janis from Sopranos too

THANK U

Thanks!!

This is exactly right! You certainly do have a wonderful father indeed. He raised and your siblings very well indeed. I can relate to your father’s concern. I was birthed and grew up in a conservative country, where Women are overly protected all the time, believe me, the first time I began learning about sex was during religion class. Many Quranic versus would relate clear consequences of sexual conducts whether both genders are single or married. Young girls or boys were sometimes subjected to abduction by older men, unfortunately. When my elder brother was 5 years old, was a very beautiful kid with beautiful eyes and hair. Someone once attempted to lure him away from my parents’ sight. Luckily, they were highly alert and managed to protect my brother at all cost. I’m highly thankful that my parents did everything to teach me and my siblings about safety all these years. Thank you for sharing your father’s advice. It should be dearly cherished 💕💐💐💐

@@judekanawati7467 Thank you for your words. I’m also very grateful to my dad for giving that advice. You are also very blessed to have parents that looked after you and thought you right. I just wish parents, teachers, anybody would tell kids these days that there’s a big different between enjoying life and just being reckless. Maybe if that would be wiser when making decisions before the worst happens.

I disagree with the last sentence. Out of context its fine, but in context, men should know better and be taught better, and you can still respect yourself while also trying to put trust in a man.

@@Aisha_LuvMan need to learn to respect woman, that's for sure. It's wrong, no matter the circunstances, for a man to force himself on a woman. I respect your opinion. But I believe we women need to be smart when it comes to comes to our safety. We can't just irresponsibly be intimate with someone we don't even know and expect that man to be 'respectful', because not every man we meet is gonna be prince charming.

@@chocolatecake7104 Of course he is not Casey or Alex. He is Rafael Barba, has his own shine and he is amazing!

@@chocolatecake7104 My language is not english. Google translated strange, but anyway, although I like Casey, Barba is the best.

They should be.He was a great student and son that was made into a rapist because both sides did not know what they were doing.

So should the parents of that girl instigating trouble when even she had no idea what was happening. She was drunk too. I'm def showing this episode to my son. Also avoid virgins dude. Liability

I agree.

I mean she did ruin his life just like she did. She has a crush on him and what to make out with him .

I don't think she was actually raped, but her parents freaked out and pressured her to say she was.

He didn't really got off that easy he was put in sex registration

Not just sex education, but parents need to teach them if they say no means no. They need to understand what is rape or consitiral sex.

@@jazminmuro9692 you said It, education starts at home

@@oberon0275 yes. But then again those boys are treating sex like it's a game. A score board for sex. That's what happened in the episode. He was being teased that he hasn't been getting laid. Or his name on the list. And the mistake was getting the girl he liked was raped by him.

With Love ikkk bruh I was really upset with the outcome

What season and episode is this

His parents didn't let him settle either

Because she was doing her job, but before they went to trial and Dodds both admitted that they weren't sure that it had to go as far as it did, but it was out of their control. Abby was underage so him even touching her was automatically sexual misconduct, Barba offered him a deal for that. I think that Chris probably would've taken that if his parents hadn't been pushing things the way that they were.

Hey, barba gvw them an offer to not handle it in court in this episode, but his parents refused bc they didn’t want his info on the registry. Parents took a chance but I guess it didn’t work in their favor.

She was not telling the truth she lie to her parents