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The day my husband killed himself I told him I would help him if it came to that, but I begged him to keep fighting. I understood his ongoing suicidal ideation and was willing to assist him in a rational mindset. But ultimately, he chose to end his life immediately because he was in crisis. He didn't see any hope and couldn't stomach trying another failed option for relief of his mental health struggles. I wish he'd waited, I wish he hadn't been intoxicated, I wish he hadn't been going through withdrawal after spinal surgery, but it was his decision. And he is at peace, finally, which is literally the only thing that helps me continue on without him. Thank you for this conversation. It's so vital to have these more and more. You two handled it with such grace, compassion, fairness, and understanding for the person struggling with the daily fight to live.
@@kavitadeva I’ve been there with my mental health and I’ve seen others who struggle with mental health and couldn’t get well enough to feel comfortable. I also think that when we die is as much a part of our autonomy as anything else.
Once in a really bad way my best friend begged me for 48 hours and said if i still felt determined he would help me plan and support me 100% just those 48 hrs of being with someone who listened and supported but qlso helped me with coping and bringing myself out of that place was so amazing and by the end of the two days i was more hopeful and less anxious, less shameful just having that one person seemingly understanding. I still struggle but i have that one person without judgment and support.
That’s so great to hear. I did something similar for a friend- did daily checkins, then had her stay with us for 48 hours while we further researched her meds and discovered the Gabapentin she was on is HIGHLY associated with suicidal ideation. We had her coordinate with her doctor to take her off of it and her suicidal ideation alleviated in 4 days and hasn’t returned yet.
Yes depression and suicide is something which can't be ignored in society as it's very important.
2 месяца назад
This is the best, most honest, most open conversation I’ve ever listened to about suicide. Thank you so much for doing this! Thank you so much for helping me get this burden off my shoulders. I’m sure I’m not the only one here.
This is such an important topic to talk about. Everyone's first answer when someone's suicidal is "don't", almost the same thing with SexEd and we all know it doesn't work for either things. We need to talk more about it and start building ways to help people that are struggling with it.
Who needs SexEd when you've got Porn. Everyone's pretty much exposed to it at this point. Literally a few clicks away. It educates whilst being entertaining as well. It has a negative side to it, yes, but that's a completely different topic for another day.
Hiding it for me was because the therapist intake forms all state they are required to inform the police. At work after Anthony Bordain, they sent a company wide email telling folks to reoort any employee expressing suicidal ideation to security. AND if you disclose it to insurance your rates go up and you become less eligible for legitimate life insurance even though your ideation maybe resolved when it’s determined that the root cause was from another illness/issue like sleep apnea or hypothyroidism
Some days ago I realized something, and told myself " would I stay still if I see someone commit suicide for the same reasons as I would " and I realized I wouldn't handle that. I would do anything to help someone going through the same issues as me and wish them the best. When I realized that I feel like something in me changed.. ideas of suicide completely disappeared.. i hope people would realize this too.. would you stay still if someone wanted to die for the same reasons as you ?
I believe that even those with suicidal ideation still want to be alive, they want to live. The problem is that, for some, the suffering and pain is too great and makes staying alive a viable option. And oftentimes they have exhausted many possibilities for healing and have sought out lots of help. ❤
My niece has schizoaffective disorder and even with medication she often feels like it would be better to be dead then live with the disorder since it affects her whole life. It is very difficult because she knows she requires antipsychotic’s for the rest of her life. We encourage her daily. This channel helps, thank you.
I appreciate this video, and the fact that you actually had experience on the subject, you knew what it feels like to be in that moment of total despair. My daughter was a meth addict, had gone through treatment, she was experiencing these demonic voices, tormenting her, telling her to commit suicide, among other tormenting issues, we prayed together, the drugs were not helping her, the hospitals were not helping her, I didn't know how to help her as I did what I could but that was not giving her relief. She took her life. I am so lost, I knew she was suffering, but nothing seemed to take away or give her a break from these voices in her head. She had C-Ptsd, anxiety, had violence in her marriage, and childhood. She loved her children, her quality of life had diminished so much toward the end. I love her and miss her so much. I think that suicide education needs to be something that should be taught more, so it is not taken wrong or stigmatized, when someone needs help. Thank you for this video.
I’m so glad you commented. I just watched this vid. Finally hearing the words someone else could say exactly what I am going through. Not having support is where I am. I finally opened up to my daughter and after that I saw a counselor. I haven’t continued that but I do feel relief. My daughter was understanding and not critical which I fell helped so much. I too always fear calling a hotline because of someone jumping to calling 911 on me. The counselor was calm and asked me how I would do it and kept talking to me with no intense reaction. Calmness I think helps because myself I wasn’t calm. I hope you are doing well now.
Thank you for talking about this..my daughter suffers from this but change of medication made her more suicidal. I had to hospitalized her to take her off of medication that cause this. I feel so helpless as a mom to help her during this time.
Sorry to read of your situation with your daughter. Orthodox medicine often perceives helping patients through mental methods, including using mind altering medicines. In my experience and some more traditional views, Healing comes through more emotional HEART BASED methods especially anything Nurturing including Nature and Spirituality. Also physical more than mental. Anything that is more releasing or nourishing to our Hearts and Souls can bring healng and therefore soothe and calm the mind. These can be in addition to medication, if medication is required. Hope things improve for you, your daughter and loved ones. All the Best.
I appreciate you addressing this. I think it is important for people to have all the support they need but also be able to make their own informed decisions whatever they may be.
I have dealt with suicide thoughts for 13 years and not always it was a sick thinking, I guess. it was more on a philosophical way, if I may, when I was not sad but still had the knowledge I acquired during these times that manly is: life does not make sense and if I could choose, I wouldn't be alive, even if I'm not willing to end things right now. that is to say that I have never found someone that shared this same thought about the right to die and kinda of to choose when it will occur. if one can choose when to eat, to sleep, to do anything, why not when to die? right now I have not have a suicide thought for over a year (which I have never believed it was possible), but I still believe in keeping this as an option for the future instead of shaming people and making it super wrong to not want to live. as I said, suicide thinking doesn't happen only when your literally depressed, your life can just suck and you can be tired of trying to get it better. we shouldn't blame the individual. as a society we need to fight agaisnt suffering and providing better quality of life, but as we have our flaws, we can only embrace people that doesn't want to be here. thank you so much for this conversation and for your vulnerability!
I had a suicide attempt about 6 weeks ago. It was an embarrassment to my father. We live in a small town where he knows everyone. The effect that had on me will never go away.
I hope you are wrong that the attempt will always have a (bad?) effect on you. Over time, maybe the experience will transform you and give a better approach to your life. I hope it does🙏💚
My son seemed perfectly normal to us. But within 3 months after having issues with his friends, he went on a downward spiral and unexpectedly committed suicide. Because we weren't expecting or watching for signs of this, we never had the opportunity to speak to him, which would have 100% been enough for him (and us) to have a happy life. It's a different situation for us than most others who had the opportunity to intervene. Unfortunately we were not good enough as parents to see through the deflection, and his friends never let us know what was going on.
Please understand it had nothing to do with you 'not (being) good enough as parents'. When we get into what I call the 'suicide zone' there is very little anyone can do to stop us. As for not recognizing the signs, some of us can pull off an act that will fool anybody. Please don't let guilt complicate your grief! You're going through enough and I'm so sorry you're on this journey. All the best to you.
A person can want to commit suicide that is not depressed. More people who have attempted suicide need to talk. A lot of So called Dr's dont even know what hey are talking about. And here in Texas in 2023 even if you tell a educated RN because you cannot find a Dr. People need to wake up in tge nation about Mental Health. If you do ask fir help you are treated less then human really making you want to die.
In 2012 our family and friends lost my older brother to suicide. This was a very good discussion, which might also be similar to an interview by Joshua Johnson on the "1A", a show on the US national public radio, in 2018. ( It was about how to talk about suicide, and why it could be more helpful for people struggling for this not to be a taboo subject.) The more compassionate and understanding support, the better.
That was very good. I've always been happy to express how I feel provided I sense some genuine concern. However, no one has ever asked me how they can help me. Also, very few ask me to describe how I really feel. Most show a passing concern but clearly don't want to know anymore - possibly because they feel ill equipped to help or possibly because they don't care enough. You can't do much if people don't care but people certainly can learn how to 'equip' themselves, especially with the internet at their disposal.
I was 21 when I wrote a suicide note, that said(I'm done). Addressed it to my mom. I was being abused. Had been abused by so many different people, through out the years and forced to hide it.. Couldn't take it anymore. Didn't have a plan. Then I realized they didn't have a exclamation for way. So I took the note off the door and I kept writing. I wasn't able to stop. For 6 months I wrote each day and night. When I felt I had run out of things to say I gave the letters to my mom on a Tuesday night. Asked her to read them. She responded to the letters the same as she did me. She ignored them. Pushed them to the side. Each passing day I asked her if she read them. She would say no and tell me to leave her alone about those letters. I don't feel like reading no letters! I said to her. For all you know, I could have been telling you I was going to kill myself! Well son if you going to kill yourself, there's nothing yo' momma could do to stop you!. There's plenty you can do if you actually cared! She finally read the letters on Sunday morning. She shunned me. Gave the letters back. Then days later, she acted as if they were never written. I continued to add to the letters over the next 9 years. One of the poems was published in a book in 2006. The poem is titled (know Me) book (poems of the heartland.
no way to "get comfortable' I had a mother who threatened and alluded to suicide ALL OF MY LIFE ! ALL OF MY CHILDHOOD !! and into my middle age when I was in my fifties! The threats and semi-attempts never stopped.
Suicide rates in the USA are probably higher then they should be. It's intentional. The problem is the HIPAA laws and no longer accepting clinical and third person reporting. All service providers are paid to turn away services The person going through the psychotic episodes are having trouble, needs to advocate for themselves and they're not getting help. Having worked in the. USA mental health industry as a director of a psychiatric halfway house, I will venture to say that it's actually worse in the USA because of a lot of our medications, food additives, extremely unhealthy lifestyles are absolutely contributing to the suicide rates. The hopelessness in other countries may be contributing to their rates, but medications like singulair, allergy meds, antidepressants are making it worse in the USA - we have plenty of evidence. It's been there for decades.
I support “death with dignity” to avoid a prolonged traumatic natural death that is inevitable… but I can’t feel secure supporting assisted dying for non-terminal conditions. If we normalize that at all, we’re opening up the door for a profit-driven medical and insurance industry to literally encourage people to die as a cost saving measure. I feel like our ableist society will support not “wasting” treatment on anyone who is “too crazy”. That’s incredibly bleak. We need to remove stigma and shame around talking about suicidal ideation, and we need MUCH better mental healthcare in general. And ultimately, people can make their own choice to go using a painless and non-violent method. But we should not get the government or corporations involved. 😬
I think some of the very reasons people commit suicide is because they truly feel alone, misunderstood and there is no one on earth they feel they can relate to and the very reason they want to die is because people in their lives in their orbit are the problem.
In the comments it talks about everyone being on board with assisted dying. Are we promoting suicide? I think the word commit is OK. When you’re more worried about words than saving someone’s life I’m very scared. I want to live and want to find a reason to live and you’re pushing videos that push suicide and is more concerned about words. That’s very upsetting.
I came here, hoping for hope. But it seems like everyone’s commenting on how great it is to have assisted suicide. And more concerned about autonomy and people feeling safe. It’s not safe to die. I’m very afraid of what I’m gonna do.
