Normal is just another word for boring. I was always (as my mum puts it) a square pug being forced into a round hole. I've had a few people suggest that I might have some form of autism, although my official diagnosis is OCD, depression and anxiety. I can relate to all 10 of the characteristics of Asperger's though, so there maybe something to that. With delayed motor development, I had to have these lessons with a specialist teacher when I was in grade prep where I had to learn how to do things like scrunch up a piece of paper. There was also an issue with how I held a pen. My speech is usually fine, but if I'm tired, stressed or anxious I have quite a bad stutter. I sometimes have issues at work because I'm too slow, but it's usually because I put too much effort into little details. Like if I'm polishing a glass, I'll keep polishing until it's spotless, but when they're 5 deep at the bar and running low on glasses, they really just need them dried and ready to be reused as quickly as possible so that can be quite difficult for me. My brain is telling me that I've not done it right and it'll stress me out. I also tend to freak out in large crowds. If I go to concerts, I tend to prefer to either be right at the side or at the back, basically where ever there's some space.
I have Autism bpd ocd ptsd tinnitus insomnia stuck song syndrome and a deformed body. I feel your pain life has been a cruel joke for me. if I had the ability to find love of a woman it may save me but I tried hard and they dont wanna know. maybe in another life
