When we truly realize that we are Alone, is when we need Others the most. Or you just clutch your pillow to your chest and cry yourself asleep and let those feelings dry out again so that you can continue living in that shell/mask of yours the next day, as usual sorry.... that's just me, I don't have anyone but me........ and your music~ ♥ it realy does cheer me up every day (:
[.. I clutch on my hands to my chest, heart beating inside rapidly, i am chocking with helplessness, anxiety and i just wanted a warm welcome in my own self taught integrity.. No one wanted a fair trades to this life i begin to have. I was only 5 years old when i felt so alone in this full house. It is not a home for me, but a place where i trapped with no end in sight. I sobbed in my hot raging temper, tears just kept coming out, blotching every sentences that i know and trying to spill all the chaos of soundless emotions that i couldn't interpret into known languagea.. All i've known is 3 basic language that you expected a 5 years old to learned when you had no teacher at the house. Mother not knowing how to read, father always out for works, grandma also doesnt know how to read, the other busy with their life. How you teached your siblings when they never listen to you at all.... Alone in my journey, no one understand me and i doesnt know how to communicate with people who just expected you to be good already. I hated myself because i never seem to be good enough. I was raised with careless and thoughtless remarks , i hated people when they go monkey on themself. ]
Still got a picture of you on my nightstand Autumn leaves hit pavement when they die And you change like the seasons cold brisk nights welcome me with kindness feel so alone feel so gone need someone to take me home feel so alone feel so gone need someone to take home its 5 am in the city I ain't got no homeboys with me i'll drink alone just to feel it i'll drink alone to just feel me saw an angel fly down just to see me green eyes there she looked so pretty you could be the one to save me she leaned in to me then said pay me Yeah its 5 am in the city and I ain't got no one with me burnt trees make my mind so hazy burnt sleeves from the fire that made me yeah if you come down just to see me might beg for you just to free me might beg for you just to be me might beg for you feel so alone feel so gone need someone to take home feel so alone its 5 am in the city and I ain't got no one with me feel so alone
🍁eautiful 🎼 Life is one long story... Hey .. Go easy on yourself, okay You are doing the best you can and that's enough. Tomorrow or maybe later will be better. I promise, i💙u
welp sometimes being alone is far more nice and peaceful than having to bear the weight of your friends problems, it may sounnd selfish but i was raised with the idea that "the others will not feed you, we are never better serve but by ourself" you just need to pick the option you'll live with i guess
Kami Neko You haven’t experienced the worst of it. I would be friends with a murderous psychopath if it meant I don’t have to be lonely anymore. I would sacrifice anything to have some sort of company. Loneliness is so horrible. Loneliness is what drives people to become vulnerable and so lonely children stay with pedophiles to have someone “love” them, stick with bad friends to keep the only company they have left, join gangs so they belong somewhere even if it means to kill, and others so unhealthy for them because they don’t want to experience loneliness again. I would do anything to have someone, even though I know all these things are something one should never do.
@@shadow14805 funny i can say the exact same thing changing some little details and use it as well i don't think you experienced the worst either of that "wonderful things " called friends if being alone make you vulnerable, then showing your weakness to those who you think "best friends" is what ? strenght ? what about these peoples ready to do the worst to keep a friends all for themselves or the toxic relashionship resulting in the dumb one not strong enough to say "you're wrong". your going into the extrems, both side aren't black or white being alone isn't sad , if you wnat to be alone as long as you choose it it's fine happyness can be in there as well. maybe the way my father raised me isn't totally great i can agree with that but i don't plan on changing that way of thinking. i don't have much great memories from my childhood and to be honest my school experiences almost destroyed me and left me with a bitter viewe of "having friends" and even "love". i should have phrased it better in my first comment, i think i should apologize for the confusion i just wanted to be clear on "BOTH SIDE HAVE THEIR PROS AND CONS".
Kami Neko while I understand what your saying, you seem to be talking about introversion. Being introverted and lonely are two very different things. Having friends you don’t get along with indeed, and obviously, have their cons. But not nearly as much as it feels to be isolated. Having bad friends isn’t a good thing, but it’s not as bad as having no one. Having a bad house is a bad thing, having no house at all is worse. All the friends I used to have, were terrible. They backstabbed me, a large group of them turning upon me, but their knives hurt less than the knife that loneliness holds. And I wish for them to return. They despised me, I too hate them. Yet I would rather have them than loneliness. Our relationship was so toxic, but I want it back. I want them to punch me, hurt me, if it means company. At first, I’d probably think the same as you, until I felt loneliness. And when compared, loneliness is horrid. The best way to describe loneliness and introversion is this- Introversion is sitting in beautiful scenery, while holding gratitude as you appreciate the moment by yourself, hearing birds twitter as you’re the only one there. Now imagine you are in a black box. Nothing but black. There is no light. It is not a moment like the example of the introvert, but a forever state that you can not escape. There is an infinite amount of space, yet there is nothing. That is loneliness. Loneliness is a feeling. And you’ll understand it if you ever choose to isolate yourself from everyone but your family. Because loneliness has friends, and once you become lonely for long enough, only more pain will develop. Depression, ever-growing desperation. And they too will be holding knives. Loneliness has no pro’s, because it is a feeling. A negative feeling, just like anger or sadness. Except it is a feeling of intensity that holds other negative emotions, like sadness and anger, with it. The scariest part is that loneliness will sometimes choose you with you un-willing or not. Introversion can not take you, you have to give it permission. But loneliness will do what it may if you find yourself vulnerable. It will appear without you ever wanting it to if your in bad circumstances, and you’ll have no choice but to accept it until you can find a way out. *Introversion is a lifestyle, loneliness is a feeling.* If I would rather have company of a psychotic murderer, don’t you think that means I would indeed rather experience the worst of bad friendship than loneliness? The young children who stayed with the adults who took advantage of them, the teens who stayed in gangs, they are experiencing the true nightmares of “friendships”. Yet they stay, because they prefer it over loneliness.
