With thanks to Alex for sharing his story. You can find out more at the below links: Alex's Facebook Page - The Right To Die With Dignity - facebook.com/groups/278597605805885/?ref=share_group_link Pegasos, the central support group in Switzerland FAQs - pegasos-association.com/faqs/
@@alexpandolfo5617 Lots an lots of weed was class. Hope you have a lot of memories still to make before you have to make final date. All the best. 🤜🏼🤛🏼🏴
@@alexpandolfo5617 Very welcome Alex appreciate reply. I’m about to partake myself a nice PG. And I don’t mean tea. 😉 Why get cremated when we can get baked brother. 🤤
My gran chose assisted death. We are in Australia. She was very happy to go that way after fighting cancer twice and it coming back and spreading to her bones/ brain/ lymph nodes etc. She had the drink, followed it with a espresso martini, and drifted off happily 30 seconds later. Because of that experience I genuinely believe that assisted death is a blessing that everyone should have the option of
@@toastthelightfury That would be absolutely wrong. I'm curios though, what do you think about people that reproduce, do they also force their will when they decide to make a person but more to the point, do you have any respect for other people's needs or decisions regarding themselves?
@@toastthelightfury This is like saying that you don't support the idea of criminal trials because they might result in the imprisonment of innocent people. It's not even bonkers, mate. It's just stupid.
I had a job where I was more or less a baby sitter for a man in his 60’s who had Alzheimer’s and it was eerily similar to hanging out with a friend who is high on psychedelics but if your friend never knew what psychedelics are. You do not know sadness until you’ve watched someone slowly deteriorate into a violent uncontrollable human being. Guess what they do? They put you down like a rabid dog. He used to ask me are my parents still alive and then cry when I reminded him they’ve been dead for years. The saddest disease I’ve ever witnessed up close.
Watched my dad's mom die of alzheimers. We went to visit her and she was just sitting in her wheelchair crying out for her mom for hours, her mom has been dead for decades. It's the most cruel disease I've ever witnessed. I'm hoping my dad doesn't get it, along with me and my siblings.
As a carer, with dementia clients I always tell them they’re mum, dad, husband or wife whoever is running errands. I watched a carer tell my client her husband had been dead for years and she didn’t stop crying, her heart broke all over again and kept saying she’d never been to his funeral. Just tell them they’re loved ones will be home soon because they will end up forgetting that they asked. No point in putting them through heartbreak every time.
Why would you remind him that his parents are no longer alive? Why would you make the poor gentlemen re live the pain and sorrow of loosing their parents or anyone they ever loved over and over again? That’s just cruel it’s sickening have some compassion. There’s clearly something wrong with you and I hope you no longer work in care...
@@ariasworld9991 It costs a lot because it's uncommon. If it were made a standard practice and available everywhere, I'm sure it would be more cost effective.
@@LooselyGrope The easier and cheaper it is to do, the easier it is for people to be guilted into ending their lives as to "not be a burden". "The life-saving surgery is £35,000? Well you can die for £50."
My aunt was assisted as well. She was terminally ill and had fought for 17 years, this option provided her and my uncle from suffering at the very bitter end. We were all so happy for her to be able to leave this world on her own terms. Medically assisted death is a wonderful gift to terminally ill individuals.
This guy deserved more than 20 minutes - all of us know a loved one just hanging on with an utterly debilitating condition the sheer indignity and horror of just day to day living
@@judim5379 she’s at peace now. You never forget the trauma of watching your loved one go through that but it does get easier over time knowing they, and your family aren’t suffering anymore. Hope you’re doing okay, just think of the good memories you had together some people don’t even get to meet their grand parents we’ve been blessed with that privilege
Choosing to die on your own terms with the love and support of your family or friends is a dignified and beautiful thing. How sad this isn’t offered to everyone. Much love to this brave man for sharing his story and using it as a platform to inform the conversation around assisted dying.
My dad died of a very sudden and unexpected heart attack, it was absolutely awful for everyone at the time. But I take solace in how quick for him it was, we didn't have to do the visits in hospital and slowly watch the man we loved become something he wasn't. After reading some of your comments I feel it was one of the better ways to go.
@@plumduff3303 sorry taken me a long time to see your message, I appreciate what you said and I am terribly sorry for the situation you had to deal with, take care of yourself my man
So....my suffering isn't as bad as his? What about people who hang themselves because of hearing voices? Is that ending suffering too? Or is that choosing to die?
The moment I saw my father less than 24 hours before his natural death from cancer still haunts me to the day 17 years later. It was not the person I knew. Mum was looking after him for 3 years, his personal dignity was gone. I wouldn't want to live through this again.
I feel your pain my grandad had Alzheimer’s, I remember as a kid wondering why my family was so upset as I had in my mind that he was just sick and he would get better. He slowly deteriorated over the 5-6 years he was a strong man so it took him a long time to go. By the end he couldn’t eat, drink or do anything by himself he was just lay in a bed with bed sores. He would make noises like groans and sometimes you would see his eyes light up when myself or my mammar or mum walked in the door. I know he would’ve wanted this, the prolonged death and depersonalisation caused far more harm that good for everyone involved including my grandad. It was incredibly sad but when he died, I didn’t know why I felt it at the time but I felt a little bit of relief followed by sadness. R.I.P Brian Horton❤️ fly high boyo I’ll see you on the other side 👼
The things you said about the last time you saw your dad instantly reminded me about what my dad said recently about seeing my grandpa less than an hour away from his natural death from prostate cancer, this in 2015... My niece asked about my dad's last moments with my grandpa before his death to him, and my dad said the exactly same thing as you... He doesn't like to remember that day bc the memories of seeing my grandpa so close to his death (he was really distressed), not looking like the person we knew anymore were too shocking to him... And those memories still haunts him to this day At that time (I was 17 back then) I was already advocating for assisted dying and dying with dignity (unfortunately this is something my country isn't ready to debate properly, which is a shame), it broke my heart to know he passed away in so much fear, distress and pain 😭 His passing only reinforced my opinions about assisted dying, choosing to die in your own terms and death with dignity (regardless of opting for assisted dying or palliative care), no one deserves to die that way 💔
@@elliottrichardson8213I feel for you. My Nan begged every one of us to kill her for months and months as she was in agony riddled with cancer and all they kept saying was she was on maximum dose pain relief. It took days of her not being able to eat or drink or go to the bathroom, split skin and sores. If you left an animal like it you'd be arrested. I too felt a huge relief when she died and it takes a long time for the last horrific memories of them to fade and be replaced by better ones. I'm sure they'd be full of love knowing we were happy the pain and indignity ended for them. I do not understand people who can watch that and think it's a better way to die. I would never put my son through that.
Your father relieved himself from many sins (as each of us has during life) through this suffering and paved his way to better after life. Jesus Christ also suffered immensely on the cross but it was worth it.
my aunt who had dementia often asked difficult questions. e.g. where am I? where is my sister? (she had passed). i told her that she was at a fancy hotel. Told her her sister was out buying candy. my aunt loved travel and candy. she was reassured that good things surrounded her. when someones mind has disintegrated, you look after them accordingly. no honest brutal truths. they are like children and dont understand.
This is so kind of you 💗I remember looking after a gentleman with dementia; in his 'good' moments he remembered that his wife has passed away-he talked about her some beautifully and you could just tell how much he loved and missed her. The problem was whenever his daughter would visit and his memory would go, she'd remind him time and time again that his wife was dead. The sheer horror and heartbreak in his eyes was absolutely horrible 💔 We'd tell her not to do this, but I doubt she ever stopped. I truly can't imagine going through what he did every time.
Jude my mum is the same right now and has been for 2 years. My brother passed suddenly 2 years ago and she lived with him. She asks where is he (less now but was a few times a day). There is no way we even considered telling her and do the same 😢. She also asks about family members who have passed we say they they are fine. After reading your comment I am going to tell her something lovely as well ❤❤❤. Thank you for that. X
I always called my mom by her name and not mom, as eventually they forget they had children, and it upset her that people thought she had children. I also played into her hallucinations and became part of them, like an old friend telling a joke, and she's laughing by herself. I laughed too.
My dad got diagnosed with vascular dementia a year ago and he doesn't even know where he is. I completely understanding the grieving someone alive. It's actually worse than grieving someone gone.
My dad had Alzheimer's and he would have chosen to end his life through medically assisted dying. By the time he was ready to go, he was no longer competent and no longer qualified for the service. He lingered for another 7 years and died of COVID.
If this revolting disease ever comes to my door, I've already made it clear to my family that a one way ticket to Dignitas is what they're to do for me. I'm not having my mind robbed from me. All the best to you Alex.
So great that you have talked to your family. I was always grateful my parents discussed death and dying opening with us, made things so much easier at the end.
It’s time my country (U.K.) legalises this. It isn’t fair forcing people with degenerative diseases and zero quality of life, to stay alive. Really feel for this man. Not only did he have to watch both parents suffering, he now has an incurable disease too. Kudos to this lovely man for highlighting assisted dying.
It’s why my husband and I support the dignity in dying charity. My husband is terminally ill, and I know if the time came and it was something he wanted, I would support him.
What a total legend of a human he is♥️. His energy and ethos is mesmerising. So sad to hear what he’s gone through with his parents and that he is in a situation where by he has to make this choice but what a totally wonderful human being. I so wish he could do this here in the UK, here’s hoping one day people can. Wishing him all the best. X
What a truly beautiful, inspiring soul this man is. His level of pragmatism and aura of tranquility and certainty in regards to his life decisions are qualities to be admired. He appears as though he doesn’t feel fear, or anxiety. Maybe he does in private. But he certainly exudes a stoic level of self-assuredness here in this video. I hope I can learn to master this mentality someday within my own mind.
My first cousin was diagnosed with stage 4 throat cancer a couple of weeks ago. He's just 50. That's almost 3 years younger than myself. I watched my father die from cancer in 2014 and he suffered tremendously. All that said makes me question how I will deal with my end day's if I don't go suddenly. To have a party with all the people that mean the most to you and to hug,kiss and say all the things you want to before you start suffering makes the most sense to me! It's beautiful really
@liketwogrand I understand that but I really like to think that if God created us in his own image then I really believe that he is an understanding God and would forgive us. I've had a few family members that were good people take their own lives and l really hope I see them again in the end
My mother died of cancer and watching her suffer was unbearable. It absolutely broke me. If she had asked me to end her life for her I'd have done it without hesitation. I have told my father that if I am ever in an accident where my quality of life would be poor, he should switch the lift support off or if I have a terminal illness to take me to Dignitas.
My grandma passed by assisted death when i was 10. She had brain cancer, which paralyzed half her body and caused her immense pain. She applied and they let her get it. For weeks leading up to her death, doctors and psychiatrists would come in and ask her if she was sure and she always was. I would miss school days to hang out with her in her hospital room and we would watch tv and play card games. I would her my mom talk to her about her decision and my grandma sounded so at peace with it. Before her death, my family and i formed a line at her bed and each said our goodbyes. I remember her reassuring me that she was going to be fine and telling me how much she loved me. We hugged and i left the room crying. That was the last time i ever heard her voice. My mom, her siblings, and my grandpa all stayed in her room during her death. I was told that she gradually fell asleep while her favourite song was playing, September by Earth, Wind and Fire. My cousins and i all gathered in this hospital playroom and hugged each other while we cried. I remember my mom coming into the playroom 30 minutes later to tell us that she had passed. Even though i knew it was coming, i still felt my whole world crumble at those news. They let us go hug her one last time after she had passed. During her death, my and my cousins drew a picture of her as an angel and on the back, we each wrote her a message. I placed the drawing on her bed and the nurse told me that they were going to cremate the paper with her body if we wanted. We agreed and then left. My cousins had drove hours to come see her that weekend and they rented hotel rooms. After her death, i remember my cousins and i playing mermaids in the hotel pool to distract ourselves. It’s been 4 years and i still miss her everyday. Although, knowing that she was at peace with her decision comforts me.
My nana had lupus and dementia... horrendous !!! It was very very bad... the moments where she would be "normal" she immediately started crying casue she knew more or less that she was a burden and she was very very stubborn and prideful person. Thank you Ladbible for this interview and agree 10000% with this man ! We should be able to say - thats it im going. Only if its incurable and like he said - quality of life is degrading.
This is the only interview I’ve ever watched on RU-vid after seeing it on Instagram, it struck a cord as I am a live in carer and one of my regular clients (My beautiful Betty) has advanced dementia, she is the sweetest person I’ve ever know so wonderfully kind and this quite rare with dementia as clients can become aggressive or overwhelming upset But what a lovely man, he seems so genuinely kind and a great person to be around. ❤ what a brave soul
Got a lot of respect for this, he's very articulate and had clearly put a lot of thought into it. Strikes me as a person with a lot of empathy as he was talking about his friend who was in a similar situation to himself and is obviously on here trying to get his message across. Can really understand where he's coming from too, I've seen a few elderly relatives go now and some have defintely suffered and I think in ways I wouldn't want to myself. Defintely agree with him wanting to go on his own terms before he loses his conative faculties and arguably starts making it harder for those around him as it's never pleasant seeing someone you love deteriorate like that. Hopefully this sort of thing will become more widespread, it's about choice ultimately so why not offer people that sort of choice if they know its what they want and are certain?
My grandmother lost her second battle with cancer last year, The amount of pain she was in was absolutely unbelievable.. People should have a choice about death... we have plenty of choices during life..
I watched my Grandad suffer from dementia and it was horrific, Everyone should have the right to choose when they want to end there life, It's the only thing we truly own in this world our life and we have no control over it. Thank you Alex this is one more step towards the right thing. Good luck good man from a fellow Manc xx
RU-vid over time has become a background noise for me for sleep or chores. But I find myself pausing these videos, or going all the way back to the beginning of your content. Thank you and every interviewee for creating something that gives me the will to live, and not something that helps me dissociate or run away from reality. Life is truly fascinating and there isn’t enough time to learn, experience or understand everything. But these videos soothe that part in my brain obsessed with the possibilities and chaos of life 🫶🏾💗.
Alex, thank you for sharing your story and views with us. You seem like an amazing human being. I sincerely hope your days are filled with happiness, contentment and love all the way through your journey, however long or short that may be. Much love and respect. Be happy. X
@@alexpandolfo5617 I watched my dad suffer from this,it made it so bittersweet when he passed. Saw him take his last breath. Alex i pray you enjoy every moment you have left here. I pray you do not suffer. Know you are loved. Godspeed.
@@truth2vanquish Thank you for your King words . I’m sorry to hear about your dad . I understand the biter sweet . I was in a similar situation . I had watched my dad suffer for five years and death was a relief , but it’s still a loss . I always say o lost my dad twice one to dementia and five years later to death itself . You will know what I mean by suffering double loss and grief . Take care ✌️
@@alexpandolfo5617 That the truth. I know exactly what you mean. Alex. There is definitely two deaths in this awful disease I hope to God someday there’s a cure. Thank you Sir.
I've been dealing with depression for as long as I can remember, and this is something that's always been in the back of my mind. If listening to his story has taught me anything, it's that I'm not quite there yet. But it's reassuring to know the option is out there.
You won’t get assisted suicide for depression. I’m glad you’re still here with us, please look for help whether it’s from god or a therapist. I know you will find your peace one of these days
I lost my grandmother in 2010 due to Dementia. It's like you're losing them twice. First, the person you know and love withers away, and then they close the final chapter by dying. It's grief and relief. I felt relieved that she no longer suffered, but also sad that someone the family loved passed away.
My Granny died of Alzhiemers a few years ago and it was genuinely awful to watch her go from a fully functional independent woman to spending most of her time in bed unable to move, barely able to breathe. I also remember when my Grandpa was dying of pneumonia and he was in bed constantly for what felt like eons but was more likely a few months, his suffering was unbearable to watch. I feel like this would have helped both of them an extreme amount. It would also have helped mine, my brother and my mum's mental health, knowing that they weren't suffering when they passed.
My granny too. She died slowly and it was awful to watch. Alzheimer’s takes away their dignity little bits at a time and us loved ones have to watch it happen. I’m sorry you lost your granny.
This is also possible in The Netherlands (where i'm from) and I'm so glad it exists. My parents filled in forms too for this in case something happens. I think it's fair for someone to decide their own fate, to go on their own terms.
You are so lucky. That's such a good way to have things. People who have made it very clear throughout their life to their family and on medical records what they would like to happen. It's my life and I should get to choose, why does someone get to take that away from me? It's inhuman to watch people suffer like that and my worst fear is not for myself, it's that I don't want to put my son through that. I wish I could move to a more progressive country.
This man is so awesome what a personality and he really understands the difficulties others can't see, please help this man achieve what he wants to achieve before he goes x
My grandmother chose a medically assisted death, and I could not be more proud of her strength. She was an incredible woman, and she deserved to die with dignity. Alex, if you see this, I am wishing you comfort and peace on this journey and sending you love 🤍
Fortunately, I'm from CA which is an assisted death state and if something like this happens to me, I have zero doubts that this is the direction I will take.
What an incredible man. He has thought this through meticulously and hearing him talk it through, makes so much sense. Death is the only sure thing in life and, though I have no desire or need to want life to come to an end soon, the thought of having the way you leave this Earth, in your control, in your own hands, and go out peacefully and on your own terms, sounds like the most dignified way imaginable. It’s more humane than allowing someone to slowly die in agony. Absolutely thought provoking video and I wish this man the best 🥺♥️
So grateful to Alex for sharing this important message. Here in the states, many people do not live in a MAID state, since there are only 11 states that will allow it. Fortunately, Oregon did pass a non-residency option but as I understand it, it's still quite challenging to get approved. Each human being on this planet should have access to MAID. Sadly, as an End of Life Doula who lives in Texas, I've seen people suffer needlessly and it just isn't necessary when we have medications available to alleviate the suffering. Hoping that one day in the not-so-distant-future, MAID will become a right for every human.
I hope every state adopts it. I live in Alabama and if I get in the position of where I'm going to suffer until I die, I really don't want to slit my wrists and I don't want to go to another state.
I'm so happy about living 1 hour away from Basel in Switzerland and i won't hesitate any second if i contract a disease wich cannot be cured to get there and be a part of that experience.. I don't want to suffer 5 years like his parents did..
Totally agree with him, My father died from alzheimer's ..it was such a cruel long torturous death.. He also became completely deaf and blind ... My mother is now dying from dementia .. Im middle age and very ill with heart failure ..and many other serious life limiting illnesses , plus bed ridden. Its a rotten life when you deteriorate slowly and painfully. ...and have no quality of life . I despair how medical science is practically forcing us to live longer ..yet wont help those who want to die with dignity. Dad was terminally ill , practically a vegetable, yet the doctors still revived him. It took a long time before they agreed a DNR. Ive saved up enough for dignitas . Ive attempted suicide twice only to suffer even more torment ..when it didnt work. As soon as my affairs are in order, im off to the next world ..one way or other .. Just a pity uk has not opted for dying with dignity . Not keen that i have to travel alone to Switzerland .. If im lucky a heart attack witll take me in my sleep. I truely hope that everyone can get a chance to die in peace . Noone should be suffering in these modern times. Like they say " animals have a much better exit being kindly and gently put to sleep " Its an funny old world isnt it...
Thank you for sharing your story and giving us incredible insight on assisted death. Choosing to pass away on your own terms can be so empowering for many. I hope to see many more countries legalize it for the sake of humanity. Alex, I wish you a joyous and peaceful life.
So so so much respect for you, Alex! Having watched my own father and mother in law die, from dementia, I can empathise with how utterly heartbreaking it is to watch someone you love suffer, and they do truly truly suffer! It’s a very protracted, painful process, that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. If I ever had that diagnosis, I’d like to think the option to choose to end my own suffering, would be available. But as you say, the people in the lower financial bracket, don’t have that choice, and that terrifies me. I would never ever want to suffer the way they did, that’s probably my biggest fear in life. I wish you the longest life you can possibly have, and when the time comes, the most beautiful, peaceful and dignified death. May your soul rest in peace and rise in glory ❤
Dear Alex, thanks for sharing. I am happy for you having the chance to say goodbye the way you want it. You are a lovely person and i wish you all the best
Death is a part of life and it will happen to everyone . We need to stop making it a taboo subject and trying to hide or run from it. My grandad passed from a horrible battle with cancer. We had so many special memories with him although sometimes I find it hard to remember them without the horrible memory of how horrible the end was. His friends passing sounded so peaceful and she went on her terms. Needs to be looked into more I think . Wish the best for this man and his family
I was 19 and five weeks into my first year of university when both my grandparents, who I lived with and raised me like my mum & dad were given terminal diagnosis’ of Cancer & Vascular Dementia. It ruined my life for years. I had no idea what their life expectancy was if the Christmas we spent together a few months later was going to be their last. Eventually they died when I was 25, living out long, slow and degrading deaths. My grandad was a company director, the head of his rotary chapter and a beloved person who died not even able to form a sentence. They had zero quality of life and were robbed of dignity by debilitating illnesses. I don’t think they would have chosen assisted suicide, however, having to bare witness to the two people I loved most in this world fall from grace in such a way confirmed for me that assisted death, the choice to end your own life on your own terms and the ability to do it legally and not shamefully is incredibly important. This is something that should have been reformed in the UK 20 years ago.
❤Alex, you are a beautiful soul and gentle. I’m sorry all you have had to emotionally endure and the hurt you must have felt so deeply. Despite your experience’s I think you are a very courageous man. May God Bless You and Always Keep You Near and Safe. I wish I could give you a HUGE HUG 🤗. So, I am sending you a loving 🥰 hug through my Lord. I hope you feel the heartfelt love. Love from me from Scotland 🏴 xxx ❤
@@alexpandolfo5617 You’re so welcome. I’m so heartfelt for you, truly I am. Life seems to have been unfair to you, this humbly reminds me that no matter what the situation, enjoy life when you can. Somehow, your story will always be kept in my mind. Sending hugs 🤗 your way today. 😊
Thank you Alex for shining a light on a very difficult topic. Thank you for highlighting the importance of having these kind of conversations before it's too late.
My grandpa died of Alzheimer’s and it’s a horrendous disease. It completely changed him. I don’t remember exactly, but I believe he did say he wanted to die. He ended up passing in an Alzheimer’s center, with my mom by his side.
NO COERCION??????? In CANADA vets were who suffered from PTSS were offered MAID. MEANWHILE migrants walking illegally into CANADAget immediate health care.
I respect doctors in other countries who help people die peacefully rather than suffer for weeks, months or even years. My grandpa had dementia and there at the end he got terrible. I hated seeing him because it’s just sickening how badly their mind disintegrates. I also work with a lot of old people that are the same way and I feel just as horrible for every last one of them. Everybody no matter what the illness should be allowed to die if they choose. Politics, religion or others beliefs should play no part in anyone else’s lives. Dying physically hurts no one else other than the person doing it so it shouldn’t be anyone else’s decision.
When I was younger my beloved grandma was 95ish and at the early stages of cognitive decline but still remembered me and could have a conversation. I remember going to her place to eat because I felt safe and calm there and it was a time for me to shut out the world and just “be”. Anyway, I always remember asking her “whats up grandma bear” and she would say “not much just waiting around till he comes for me” meaning the grim reaper. I was always entertained by her dark humour but never thought of the reality of how she would have probably wanted this. She died 3 years ago at age 104. I love her and miss her dearly. Can’t think about her without crying. Atleast now she is happy and free and not waiting around. I love you grandma😢
My grandmother died from Alzheimer’s at 86 in 2021. It’s a tragic fate. I wish she’d been given that option. It could’ve given her a more dignified end. Sad to see her sitting there and repeating “No Way” over and over again. Towards the end she no sense of self or recognition. The only good thing is she is reunited with my grandfather who passed in 1998 from lung cancer at 64. Their stone is emblazoned with “When Irish Eyes Are Smiling”.
Everything Alex said was perfect. I struggle to think how anyone could disagree as like he said, it’s the individuals choice. Thanks for sharing this story.
He makes a rational case for it. If that is his choice I simply can not fault him. This is the kind of of sound mind consent we need to have in order for this to be ethical. Sending you love. ❤
Wow, this one blew me away. What a thorougly nice bloke! Wish you all the best Alex. I hope that the UK can come round and start to offer people the dignified choice of choosing how they die as well as live.
I absolutely support your choice. I'm in my mid fifties now and i never realized how hard it is to grow old. Being old is just not enjoyable and we deserve to make the choice to die peacefully and with dignity at a time of our own choosing.
WHAT A REMARKABLE MAN. I love the sound of his laughter knowing he's facing such difficult time's. Alex will be in my thoughts for some time to come. Watching my Father die a HORRIBLE death was the hardest thing so I rejoice for Alex being able to do it his way.