Matteo Lane Makes Penne Vodka 

The bravery of this man to cook and eat a red sauce while wearing white

Our boy here is not only a good cook, he also rescues damsels in distress ☺

“That was the straightest I’ve ever been”😂😂😂

Not Matteo comparing using the gym on the weekend to being “a third class passenger on the titanic trying to get to a life boat” 😂💀

"... literally pigsalt ..."

It hurt me watching you dump the rest of that vodka down the drain😭

The finale of Coco makes me cry too, it's the fact that she - a super old abuela - dies and runs to her parents, way younger than she is, yelling "dad" like a small child, I just can't I have tears in my eyes just by writing it dang! By the way being born in the mid 80s I missed the peak wave of vodka pasta in Italy, and I've never had it. I'm kinda curious thoug I'd probably not eat it because of onion.

First long form video I’ve seen but I love your stand up! You have a great energy and know how to captivate an audience 10/10 man

"This is lava." Great line. Love your comedy/cooking show!

You’re very considerate. My neighbors don’t give a sht about singing (and doing other things) extremely loudly when we share a (very thin) wall.

5:48 to 5:58 is hilarious. There's like 12 different cuts in there spliced together to make a sentence, but its so smooth lmao

Try to make pasta alla Norma next time. It’s a Sicilian recipe, not so hard to do but so good to eat 👌 Daje Mattè!

We need more Cooking with Matteo videos! Love them!

Omg this looks so yummy! Penne alla vodka is my favorite💖 Would love to see penne all'arrabbiata next, it's so underrated!!✨

I am always impressed how Matteo wears white tees and somehow never gets sauce all over them

When you added black pepper, I thought of your friend Nick and almost died! 😂😂😂

This series just makes me so happy. Also, someone somewhere MUST use that fire alarm moment for their romance novel. What a meet cute!

I cried at that exact moment during coco ♥️

So straight calling the smoke alarm a fire extinguisher 😂 Werk.

Matteo come to Portugal, we need you!! 😘🔥🇵🇹

Make Pasta all’assassina next !!

oh wow, this was a NEW video! got so used to being in the backlog. *this was really fun, nice apt, and i always liked this dish but never had it from scratch. thanks for sharing!! :D

Love all of your pasta videos. You make it look so easy! I love eggplant parmesan and lasagna. Make you can give those a whirl :)

Chopping the onion breaks some sort of membrane in it that releases something that makes you cry. (If you wear contacts, they act as a barrier & you don't cry as much, if at all). Also, I cried thru 75% of Coco.

Please make more of these

“Penny olive oil cup”. Sounds exotic. Thanks RU-vid captions!

I sobbed for Coco, too!

Italians: are the words for writing and fucking the same or similar? Love watching you cook, Mateo!

I ugly cried at the end of Coco too

Love your vids!

Matteo did you just pour the leftover vodka down the drain??? :O :D

It would be great to see a lasagna recipe. I cooked some of pastas you showed and they were perfect!

Matteo king!

Would love to see how you make pasta aglio e olio.

To answer your question, the onions make you cry when only chopping because cutting the onion cells releases gases that are basically the same as tear gas. lol

A clean sharp knife used to slice cleanly through the onion prevents tears usually. Chopping the o ion will tear you up with burning vapor.

Cooking AND Italian lessons in one video!

Since you don't enjoy Penne and you don't like to eat it when it's hot, Penne all' arrabbiata is just the perfect dish for you.

Saw your interview on Sherri Shepherd's show yesterday. Hope it opens some doors for you.

My trick to not cry while chopping onions is to not buy the onions in the first place

Pasta e ceci? Have you done that one before already? I’m not Italian and I found it a few years ago and the whole rosemary thing blew my mind.

I would love to see you make fresh pasta by hand. It really is pretty simple; just eggs, flour, olive oil, some salt, and a bit of elbow grease.

I'm here for the humor.

I chew gum when I chop onions and it helps. Love your cooking and standup!

I started looking around my environment to see where the alarm was going off. Haha

Looks yummy! Please come to Portland on your way to Seattle! I know it’s probably too late to add a show there, but it doesn’t hurt to ask. :)

Yessss I would watch you literally stare at a wall for hours I love your videos, but also I’ve been dying to know how you would make this

You're so brilliant, Mateo! Thank you so much for all the laughs & recipes! The acidic gas in onions released by chopping is attracted to the moisture in your eyes, nose, mouth. (mucus membranes) a chef taught me to always chop onions with a piece of bread hanging out of my mouth. The bread absorbs the burny oniony air. Also, lighting a candle & placing near cutting board & finally, I've heard placing paper towels in water, then under the onion you're chopping also helps - but I can't get my head around how you only chop the onion & not get little, cut up bits of paper towel in your diced onion. Hope this helps! & you keep your flame burning so brightly! You light up the world! 🕯️🔥🕯️

OMG did you throw the rest of that vodka away? I woulda drunk that! lol

⭐⭐⭐⭐ I love your PENNE... Vodka pasta recipe.

Look at you being neighborly.

This video made my day better.

As always, your food looks delicious!

I love him. The video doesn't matter. You better werkk.

Re onion: try watering the blade and the board - dont know if that's the reason or just placebo but works for me

Cut both ends of the onion and rinse it in cold water. You will never cry.

Thanksgiving Lasagne please, Matteo!! Give the people what they want

How is he not getting tomato splattering on that white shirt??

oinions are still alive when you cut into them. the released chemicals and reaction of tears is the oinion begging you not to kill it

Matteo lane and cooking????? There is no better combination!

Please tell me I’m not the only one with a notepad for the recipe

You aren't the only one who lost it at the end of watching the movie Coco! I love pasta. You can cook for me anytime Matteo! Nick (the other Nick) hehe

Love these Italian cooking shows of yours!! Great job. How about trying baked ziti casserole or something you can make for 6 or more? That would be great. Egg plant would be fun...maybe prep with Nick cor the eggplant LOL!!

Where is the golden girls cup for the pasta water, Mateo?! I missed the 🎶Thank you for being a friend🎶

I made this and it slapped so fucking hard. 😭

Mateo my husband made pasta alla mama and it was delicious. Please thank your mother for us. We also love your comedy. Please keep making more recipes. Dean and Kelly Dunday

“I like your apartment it’s cute.” That’s the straightest you’ve ever been, Matteo?

Shout out to the company cellar and the generous pour😂.

"It's lava, it's made with lava." 🤣 wonderfully fun video! I'm with you, I can't really distinguish the two in language; next time I'm in Italy ( as a lesbian who *cannot* hear the difference btwn penne/penis) I'll stay on the safe side with risotto. 😉

You should do a video with @itsQCP because he LOVES making Italian food as well.

Make lasagne, please. And bring your tour to Minneapolis!

Authentic Lasagna!

I'll be seeing you April 29th in OKC!

You have no idea how amazing it is to have another gay man making real videos for the masses! Your just incredible Matteo! 🖖

Keep your onions in the fridge; cutting them cold with a super sharp knife, you won’t get all the crying, easy peasy risi bisi.

Freeze onion and you won't cry. Not totally frozen but very cold

Looks delicious! My fav pasta to make is Spaghetti alla Nerano

Trofie al Pesto. The northern coastal region Liguria is especially celebrated for its light, herb-heavy dishes. ...Lasagne alla Bolognese. Make those!

I read on another cooking blog to put the onion cut side down on wet paper towels and you won't cry. Have not tried it

I would love to see you make Spaghetti All’Assassina!

Love it !

Watching this while eating Chicken Marsala. And of course, have to read up on its origins - Italian! Yay! 😎 PS. Come back to Pittsburgh this summer. Let’s go to Kennywood. 😊

To reduce onions making you cry, make sure your knife is extra sharp and if you put the onion in the freezer for a bit, it'll freeze the cells so they don't release the things (whatever they are, idk man) that make you tear up.

Would love to see a pesto dish, Genovese maybe?

can you do a video on baked macaroni and cheese, PLEEAAAAASSSEE??!!

I fully expected him to make a cocktail with the remaining vodka, so when he poured it in the sink I was like 😧

If you only breath through your mouth while chopping onions, you won’t cry. 😊

I'd like to learn a spicy, vegetarian marinara sauce, please!

Leave the root end on when you cut the onion. So cut it in half, cut the other end off, then cut your thin slices vertically with the tip of knife going in a few 1/4 inch from the root pushing the butt of the knife through the other end you cut, and then cut horizontal starting at the end you cut off to the other side eith the root. This also help hold all the onion in place together, and make it easier cut. Most of the chemicals that are released from an onion that make you cry are in the root.

Matteo, you are an icon. The Hopelessly Devoted to You sent me. I would loooove to see you make Spaghetti all’assassina!

I run onions under some water for a few seconds to take away the burn

Hi, I really love your videos. My favorite pasta is a dish from Napoli. Spaghetti aglio, olio, pepperoncini. I would like to see how you make it.

I saw you in Orlando and you were amazing! Have you done baked ziti?

Get that Caraway sponsorship… what what!

The trick I have for cutting onion without crying is to hold a bunch of water in your mouth. Take a swig, don't swallow. You have to either chop very quickly or replace the water periodically, but it's worked for me before. You can swallow once it stops working and get another mouthful

The most important part of cooking in the kitchen: Singing!!! 😊

Very quick thinking calling that smoke detector a “fire extinguisher” to neutralize any trace heterosexuality you could have been exposed to. Remember boys, safety comes first!

I saw a trick to cutting onions. Hold a slice of bread in your mouth. Half sticking out and half in mouth and then cut onions. I did and no tears. I have no idea why but it worked for me

Matteo please where'd you get your cornicello necklace!!!!???

The smoke alarm goes off when ppl take super hot showers in my flat. Can't get things steamy.