Meri saas tang karti hain.....Dealing with a difficult mother in law 

Connect with me on other social media - LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/dr-meghna-the-therapist-mommy/ Instagram - instagram.com/thetherapis... Check out my podcast for parents of children: Moms are from Mars: get.playy.tv/bl5ys3 Podcast for parents of pre-teens and teens: Modern Paren'teen podcast: get.playy.tv/16hufh

Thank you for this. I had a terrible day yesterday. My mother in law started crying yesterday. This is what happened: I had put vegetables in the cooker. And went to the living room. The cooker sarted whistling (while she was in the kitchen). she called me out and I answered back I am coming. When I got to the kitchen she said she was calling out to which I replied that I also said I am coming u did not hear it. To this she said I could not hear due to whistles. I said ok. Then she said I did not know what was in cooker. I said I put vegetables when you were standing right besides me, I thot u knew it. That's it! I went out of the kitchen. And then my husband calls me out and says mom is crying because you back answered her!!! I literally slapped myself with disbelief and anger and frustration....I feel like banging my head because my mil can get offended about anything and everything.....I feel like running away and never coming back to this place

It took 14 years to understand gray rock method. Unknowingly I started applying that. Thanks to your video that I got to know this term. I have applied all the methods to my MIL. Now I had to skip the forgiving part. Because I am tired of her high end manipulations. She never leaves any stone unturned just to hurt me. I am stuck with a narcissist. She manipulates even house helps against me. Mentally I am just tired of running away from her. I am scared of her. She is a cold rock.

MIL poisoned my husband against me and convinced him to believe that I am his emotional and financial burden. I know as long as I stay with my husband, she wont give him any peace. Hence I decided to move to my parents house and would try my best to become financially independent. To me my independence and self respect is priority. Time is a healer they say. Perhaps it will heal the marriage sometime in future. If it doesn’t, it will hurt me greatly but eventually I have to keep moving forward for my parents’ sake and also myself.

Similar situation. My MIL has a problem with almost everything. She expects me to dress according to her choices. Has a problem seeing me with her son and the strange thing is has a problem with me spending time with my 3.5 month infant. Very intrusive and privacy invading. Tries to copy almost everything I wear and do. She is in her 50's but competes with me. So illogical

I am exactly doing the same thing as you mentioned in the video and trust me i am happy keeping distance and keeping conversation to the minimum with her(mil) and helped me lot instead of being with her i distract myself with watching videos or reading books...I am in peace now... 🙌

Actually my mother always used to find faults in my bhabhi, and i also took sides with my mother blindly but my bhabhi one day taught my mother a good lesson and now me and my bhabhi never allow her to criticize unnecessarily Actually my bhabhi is an independent girl, at first I used to think my bhabhi is agressive and dominating but later I realised that it that my mother used to snatch her freedom to do anything like going out for work, wearing pants and shirt, talking to her friends and even criticized her for less dowry Not making food all the tree times ,so later i realise that the dominating nature of my bhabhi is infact a good thing to teach a selfish lady as my mother So yes my bhabhi is a bit short tempered,she is a bit vocal and confident but she was not wrong and now she has no one against her as i fully support her ,i mean how can i not support her ,she changed my perspective towards women, opened my eyes and now each time she really give my mother a hard time whenever she pokes in her personal life

Maine aapka video dekhne se pehle hi ye sab kuch try kiya meri saas ne fir bhi mujhe itna torcher kiya ke mai apne bete ko bataungi tum bilkul baat nahi karti humre Kismat hi kharab thi ke hum sochte bahu ke aane se ghar me khushi hogi unho ne mujhe sab ke saamne disripect kiya mujh pe jhoote allegation lagaye mujhe unse nafrat si hogayi hai mai ne unke liye shadi se pehle bhi bohat kuch kiya ek waqt me mujhe unse bohat mohabbat thi even apni maa se bhi zyada par aaj me unko face bhi nahi karna chahti.

More of all this....I have started being spiritual also...hope 1 day I will start feeling better...m really tired by choosing my husband..

That sounds 100% like my narcissist MIL. Tough as it may be, living separately with your husband is the only way to live in peace. Such women will never change. They're insanely jealous and will manipulate every thing, person and situation to suit themselves, others be damned

I did this n i did succeeded....... please other womens follow this same rules...... u will be happy i swear ...... i hope all those womens who r suffering frm this will get more happy one day..... good luck 😘

This is what I had been trying to do - to try and stay aloof and now she complains to my husband that I don't talk to her much and that I don't put much effort in building the relationship😂

After reading so much of comments now i understand i m not the only person there are sm other womens also facing such problems. Feeling stable and calm after reading all experiences comparing mine. I m going through depression because of mother in laws behaviour. Today i just searched on youtube and i got my remedy which any psychologist can't understand and cure. Thank you so much to all these ladies to share their experiences and thank you dr meghna ji for this motivational video❤

I wonder why many mother in laws are like this. It's also very unfortunate even men and women both have to face this these days 😂.

Just cut her off a d live separately with your husband . Stand up women for yourself . Husbands mother had come abroad to stay with us for months . Mentally tortured a pregnant lady . My husband didn’t take a stand . I left the house . And came back when they left . Now my husband learnt a lesson and tries to keep his mother and me as far as possible . Not only that she blocked my way and didn’t allow me to go out . I called the police complaints against her and stayed in a refuge

Aisi mother in law meri bhi Hain or har baat PE jhooth bolna jasoosi karna sabki or sabko Shak ki nigah se dekhna garibo ko nokar samjhna buri tareeke se pesh ana ...even apne husband se bhi unki banti nahi or mere husband ko bhi manipulate karti Hain or agr vo sach ka sath dete hain to unko bhi sabki Nazar me gira deti Hain or emotional drama or fir nay jhooth ready ...jisse ki ghar ka mahol boht kharab hai ....or do beto me partiality karti hain ..mujhe samjh nhi ata mai deal kaise karoon... jaha meri soch khatm ho jati h waha se unka dimag chalna start hota h itna shatir dimag h ..

Exactly the same things my MIL doing with me. Thankfully I am working woman but my work is remote work and I do my office work from home. I have my sister in law (Devrani) she just gave a birth to baby. My mother in law everytime tried to down myself. I have seen she do the partially between me and my Devrani. She always praised her. When me and husband argue with eachother she always interfare. I always afraid because She always instigates my husband against me.

Yes. All these points are correct. This is how I deal with my narcissist MIL. Even tho she is 95, the wickedness has only increased. Unfortunately, we are forced to live in the same house together. So I gray rock her, never tell her my plans, keep my answers short and non-committal and don't try to engage in any conversation except the bare minimum . I don't like being this way since I'm normally very empathetic and affectionate but I have to preserve my sanity and stop getting insulted for being good to her

Aisi saas k liye vridhashram hai

Bhut acha aur sahi bola aapne ....... Phele baar kisi lady ne bilkul perfectly kaha........ ❤❤ U r so intelligent and educated lady. ... Thank you so much mam❤🎉

Its high time women learn to fight for themselves and defend their self respect...Nothing and no one is worth taking any form of abuse..sometimes you have to roar to make the enemy deaf 😅..If Mil is good n nice respect and love her by all means, but if she is torturing you do not take it lying down..what you tolerate will continue and no change will come. ..Married for 5 years n I don't give a rats ass if my husband's family likes me or not..But husband's support is very important without that it can be difficult and girls please speak to ur own family and don't hide from them .❤love n best wishes to all the tortured souls called "Daughter in laws"

All the fault is of son/husband, Ladke apne ma pe akh band kr k bharosa krte hai par apni wife pe nhi Isiliye mother in law or any member from the family can easily torture a daughter in law. If a man started taking stand for her wife than no one dare to do so

Arrange marriage. Living w in laws. Yesterday i went home late , first time in 2 years. Dint inform her, but informed my husband about my status. I reached home, she started w giving me lil thing that u should have called and all. I said i told my husband. Later the argument escalated when she said kaha ghumri thi. I got mad and gave her back . Back n forth was happening. My husband dint tell her that she texted me n its fine. He went to bathroom. He dint respond when i called him out. After some 20 min argument, i had enough and told her that he is my husband , you are not my husband . I have informed home n i am not obligated to you. That was it. All the melodrama, calling my parent, crying, swearing what not happened. I said sorry in the end for my statement. But she blew things out of proportion . Situation is tensed at home. What am i suppose to do!

Dear women... You all are lovely and beautiful and very much self sufficient. There is nothing in the world that a woman cannot achieve. BE FINANCIALLY INDEPENDENT. You all have your own parents to look after, your own beautiful lives. Care for those who value you, and distance yourself from those who don't value your individuality. Instead of staying in an unhappy marriage and dragging the relationship its better to realise the worth of our own lives, be financially independent and serve the country and others who most need it. Make a difference and remember we have every power to make the world a beautiful place. Please don't suffer.... Your life is precious, you are precious!!

Meri to MIL ne meri shadi hi tudwa di. Mere pati ko mere itne khilaf kar diya ki meri delivery ke 4th day hi pati chhod ke chla gya. Wo isi din ka intezar kar rahi thi or usne ye kar dikhaya. Pta nhi kya milta hai in MIL ko ye sab karke or apne hi bete ka ghar ujaad ke.

Mam, make more videos on mother in law and how to handle the toxicity

Log bolte hain ye maa baap se alg hogae jinhone itna kra pr ye nhi sochte k itna majbur krdia jata hai unhe alg hone k lie agr wo ache se reh le to koi kisi k lie bhoj nhi hoga sb mil jul k itne pyr se rhenge wo kyu nhi sochte thori umar reh hai aram se reh lo

It's been 4.5 years of my marriage, and my MIL has been torturing me over good for nothing issues, similar to what is described in this video. At first, I used to go to my mother's house for a break from her, but unfortunately, my mother passed away, and now my home isn't the same without her, so now I mostly stay at my in laws only. For me, the feeling of acceptance did the trick. That, I have to live here and there is no other solution. I didn't know this "gray" rock term, but I had already started applying it. Today, my MIL remains the same, but I have learnt to ignore her playing the victim. She is sooo not part of my thoughts anymore, I keep myself so busy with work. Feels good actually. 😊

Same mother in law am staying...every morning I wake up & cry...and going to work Same thing repeat next day....my husband isn't taking any stand

🤣once I asked my mil, mom how was ur mil ? She said mil bhi kabhi achi hoti h kya😂😂😂...n I was in my mind like whattt😳...aap bhi toh mil hai matlab aap bhi achi nhi ho 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Ap logo ki video dhkhe mind bht positive hota hai...

Even when I maintain distance, she has problem with that “ ki mere pas ake kbi baith ti ni or baitho toh hmesha len den ki batein”

Thanku sooooo much mam 💞😘, Mai xush ho geyi aapki tips soonkr , kyu ki mai yehi tips use kar rehi hu..so aapki tips soonkar our zyda himmot mil geyi.... Thank you 😊

Mere mil to apnea bete ko dekhte he muh banake Bolney lagti hain.itna natak karti hain..hamesha bimar hain thak gayi bolti hain aur har samay Kuch namaste kuch to khati rehti hain..aur Mera koi bhi kaam usko sahi nahi lagta..oh god I feel really tired..uska Sakal dekhte hi Mera palpitation suru Hota hain.plz help kya karung

Your Grey rock strategy is best. ❤❤

I can't deal with these toxic susral.plz Allah help me😢

Thank you so much mam...This is exactly my situation

I am following the gray rock method to maintain peaceful balance in my life

All these hurts you back emotionally

I have a good friend who is from Scotland and from a Muslim background but had to move into her husband’s family home after they got married in 2019 up north in Scotland. Her husband’s family are incredibly toxic and mentally abusive towards her. She makes excuses for the husband but I think he’s as bad if I’m honest as he won’t allow them to move back to be closer to her family despite the fact she’s said she’s been suicidal before. He is an offshore worker and is away like 80% of the time so it would make sense for them to live where is convenient for my friend. She had to give up her career as well and they have one son and are soon due to have a second child. The husband’s family are very weird and my friend says she believes the cousin is a possible pedo as he is very inappropriate around young people. From listening to her talk about it seems like she is very much gagged in the situation so really not right.

Mene 8 saal jhel liya...taane, husband k sath chugli, mene decide kar liya hai ab me nahi reh skti... me ye ghar chod dungi bohot jald, bhale fir muje husband se dur q na rehna pade... isase jada mujse handle nahi ho raha,... mene apne aapko distract rakh kr b dekh liya,mene ignore kar k b dekh liya... tb vo mere husband ko mere hi saamne meri burayi aur complain karti hai

It really does not matters whether ur independent or no they treat the same I am facing the same since 4 yrs nw

I do exactly the same things...i keep myself busy...and try to ignore

Mam mujhe shadi ko ek saal ho chuka hai..mere sath problem ye hai ki ...meri saas toxic hai...Mera mayke Jana ya bahar Jana bhot mushkil rehta hai....mai kahi ja a nahi skti.....or bhot si problem hain...lekin ye sbse zada mujhe preshan krti hai

Its better 1.5 years that i have been married. Till today my mother in law complaints the things she wasn't satisfied in the wedding, reminds me now and then that gold was enough, and she did not like the reception food etc.

Unknowingly, I was doing this not actually, but approximately...

Ma'am mere husband 3 brothers hain sbse bade bhai aur mere husband married hain aur ek brother abhi shadi k liye ldki dekh rhe Hain meri saas aur jethani dono mil kr mujhe bohot mentally torture karte hain jethani ab alag kitchen m apna kaam krti h pr wo hamare kitchen m bhi interfere krti h fridge alag hone pr bhi hamara fridge use krti h meri saas use bohot support krti h aur mera moral hamesha down krne k koshish krti h mujhe kbhi support ni krti m depression m jati ja rahi hu jbki saas aur devar mere sath rhte hain aur devar ki shadi k baad bhi wo mere aur husband k sath rhne ki bolti h but mujhe hamesha pareshan krti hain aur mere muh pr jhoot bol deti hain mere husband meri nhi sunte unka gussa bohot tej hai hamari married life bohot jyada spoil ho rahi h mujhe smjh ni aa rha m kya kru jb wo mujhe psnd hi ni krti to kyu mera pichha ni chhodti meri jethani ko bohot jyada pyar krti h maid k trh se uske hr order ka agree krti h

I am facing so situation. twelve years have passed she has hold my husband and my children. Before two years I take stand for it i am living my life . sometimes I feel sorrow. After it i pray to God. God sabka hota hai.

Somehow so much related to my life. But too much extreme she keeps telling people I go out with men after my husband left for work or talk to men on laptop to create fights between me n my husband..I work so she even said if he let's me work I'll go away with some guy from office..she says I try to kill her n her son whenever she and her son have a fight. She even called the police on me saying i physically assaulted her just bcoz she and her son had a fight and wanted to punish me for it . But it was sorted because the neighbours gave a statement in my favour. I left that home and I am not in contact with my inlaws at all.. thankfully my husband is on my support and he knows his mom is wrong so he never asks me to keep contact with her n protects me.

my mother in law always finds something wrong.Like how I don’t eat much or how I use 'apni' with her instead of 'tumi'. I never protest or react. But that upsets her too.I don’t have many friends and so I have a habit of telling my husband everything. He always reacts in the same way. That is telling me to adjust. I feel lonely in my marriage.

Ur just superb …..just wow ..no words Mam…want to hug you for ur suggestions… I already follow all the suggestions which you mentioned in this video but I was in a doubt whether I chose right way or not.. Today after watching ur video.. am 100% confident and happy.. thank you soooo much for comforting me Mam which is really required for me at this point of time ..other important thing I want to share with you Mam.. this is the first review I ever gave in my life.. .RIGHT VIDEO AT RIGHT TIME GOOGLE SUGGESTED ME..TQ google..

Allah same to same ye to agar meri sister in law sunegi to sochegi Maine likha...

Please help me. Meri love marriage hui h and mere in laws ( especially saans ) mujhse nafrat krte h. Wo hm k fever me Marta hua chor kr ghumne chale gye aur mere papa Nhi rahe to kehte h Unko Bhul jao husband hi Tmhra asset.wo Duniya bhar me Meri burai krte. Ab wo mere Chacha k v Meri burai krna start kr diye. Mere in laws k h k hm Unke naukar ban kr rahe. Wo Mera job krna independent hona existence v pasand Nhi krte. Husband sb Dkh kr v ignore me dete h. Hm mentally Bht suffer kr rhe h. Please guide me and help me

A mother in law as per my opinion feels scared of dilution of power. A wise lady would keep her on the throne and be her manager who does everything for her. So, the plan is still urs because u suggest it everytime but when u ask her" mummy g lets do it this we" she feels included and respected thats all she wants. Inclusion and respect.

How to deal if she is complaining to your husband? And your husband is getting pressurised by her

What is the life of a woman in this country if there is even a need to do all this on everyday basis. MIL thinks she owns everything including the DIL, which is very sad. Its better for women to start looking for work and moving out instead of living in such hell hole for all those who are eligible to find work and leave home. Otherwise life is so miserable. I am a dentist but I am still going through it.

Talk and teach is easy. Join in the problematic family then will see how you could control and solve the situation.

Perfect strategy....but too late for me. Suffered a lot.

Ma'am then I have question. Why we should live togather? Why family and society pressurize to be married. Why only girls have to go to their home? Because this negative ruis husband wife relationship also

Nd when she calls me loudly I became shock any solution. Kameeni hai wo i dont like her behavior it hurts alot. I don't feel good when I enter in the kitchen I am shivering.....

I have an unusual situation to explain. The sasu lives in India but she is controlling her daughters every move over the phone.

Thanks for the tips. But still tough to live with mil.

Bilkul sahi mere sath bhi asa hi hota hai

One of my friend is in govt department n group a officer...n her MIL said hmara ehsaan maano naukri krne de rhe h. Un buri saaso m se nhi h jo bahu ko naukri krne nhi deti

38 k views means 38:k tortured people 😂

Move away to a different city/state/country if possible. If you have to stay with her detach emotionally as much as possible. If you have tried to tell your husband about this and he has not been helpful so far, it is unlikely that he is going to be of much help later. Very very difficult situation but unfortunately reality of most MILs and mothers in India.

Thanks dr..for video..and sharing ur knowledge with us..👍👏👏

Correct hai ase hi hona chahiye

Maine try kiya.. ki baate kam se kam kru..but wo mere husband ko bolte hai. Ki ma baat ni krti unse ..ni ho pata yr baat krna unse .. wo har baat oe taunt deti hai. Sabke samne acha dikhti hai..but hume pata hai ki wo kis chiz pe kya taunt de Rahi hai ..😢. Suffocation feel hona lgta hai .jis tarh se har chiz pe wo control rkhna chahti hai

Thank you it helps a lot ❤❤❤

I cannot forgive how to be forgiving

Avoiding the issues and keeping yourself shut off will not reduce stress, it will just reduce direct harassment. However problem will still remain. Unless you convince your husband to move out and take job in different city, you will not be happy - since MIL’s goal is to ensure your marriage will not be happy

Meri marriage ko 26 years ho chuke hain. Meri saas kahin jyada toxic hai. Itne years mein adjust karte karte meri health down ja rahi hai aur wo lady din pratidin strong hote ja rahi hai. Itni age hone par bhi wo bedroom, kitchen, pooja room sab mein full control rakhti hai. Wo har samay mere aur mere husband ke beech differences create karna chahati hai. Please someone help🙏 Grey rock method apply karne par bhi agar wo provoke kare aur relatives ke samne humiliate kare, to kaise situation handle karna chahiye??

Thnq so much mam i was thinking of changing my husband bcoz of my motherinlaw😅

MAM, I was 35, when I lost my husband, raised two children as a single parent,worked day and night as teacher in school then tuition at home,now my children are well performing in careers,but fail to recognise my efforts,i paid everything upto their postgrads n then their marriage,but under the influence of their their spouses,they say it was only their own efforts that they have risen in life,…I have spent my youth ,now I am 61 years, now they wish to keep me to serve in their houses,if I deny sometimes, they threaten me of harming themselves and yell at me.MAM please answer i really need counseling

Thanks alot to both of you...the lady who asked this question and to u dr meghna....m too dealing with exact situation with my MIL since my marriage....🙏🫶

Y vidio mery ley aaya h thanku so much univers 🙏🏻🚩

I have 8 month's baby, just after marriage I concieved my job was 1 n half travelling from my place so i was going to leave my job, but as far as my mil got to know i conceived she came here from village n my whole pregnancy she mentally tortured me... each n every thing my husband do for me she had problem with that i contined my work because i couldnt handle her torture n that time my husband was standing beside he used to protect me over it,but after baby arrived its hell for me.. my 6 months maternity leave was so horrible she started crying for each and everything..... watever i do in kicthen she has problem with that.. what to do i cant understand i cant become her Robot..i cant work as she want.. i find peace at my work now that also they cant digest now want me to leave my job n handle house hold work like a full time maid n if i cant do that they have problem now my husband started saying me kyaa sanskaar diye he tumhare maa baap ne n all.. y all these women has to face

Thank you so much mam🙏Ye accurate meri v kahani hai😢Me v iss daur se gujar rahi hun😴Sahdi ke sirf 2mahine huye hai lekin saas apni asliyat shadi ke 6tha din se dikhadiye. Ek don v aisa nahi hai jo achhe gujre. Apke bataye huye method me v pehle se apply kar rahi hun lekin usme v uska dikkat hai. Wo sasur aur bete ko meri baare me humsa olta pulta aur jhuthe baatein banakar kehte hai. Kabi kabhi lagata hai ki pagal jaise par kabhi kabhi zyada husiyar se v husiyar lagta hai wo aurat. Jina muskil au dipress karke rakha hai🙄

Thankyou so much ma'am...your advice helped me alot🙂

Mam grey rock method me they say ki ye to bat nai karti

Thank u for your suggestion ❤

Thank you so much

But as a working woman it is difficult..my job is wfh....I m prone to make mistakes in my job

Thnq u dr. Difficult to even face her

​Job karo tabhi koi ijjat nhi hoti hai ..har saas ko ek bahu mein chahiye ki woh ghar ka kaam bhi kare and job bhi kare and bache bhi sambhale...but aap batao kya yeh possible hai .. indirectly unhe ek naukrani chahiye apne​ liye......and ignore agar karo bhi toh kab tak ..kyun ki unka nature toh aise hin rahega ....woh apna comment karna tana marna bahu k maa papa ko bejjat karna yeh toh chalta hin rahega ..ignore karo tab bhi unka apko provoke karna chalu hin rehta hai toh ek insaan hone k nate ek bahu kab tak sahegi and ignore karegi ..akhir bahu bhi insaan hai usse bhi shanti se jine ka haq hai .....bahut ko mayke bhi tak nhi jane dete ....uske liye bhi ladh padhenge na ..aur na hin mayke walo ko yaha sasural mein aane dete hai......hai koi solution iss cheez ka .

I'm facing this same problem. I'm working as an engineer but she wants me to quit the job .I need your help

Same condition facing my saas is so over she behave like she is god .she has done no mistakes in her life .but her bshus are criminals according to her .

First of all become financially independent....than decide you want to live with them or not...life is too short to feed toxic peoples ego .

In most of the cases, such RU-vidrs just telling us for money and views in her own videos. She never stayed in in-laws and dont have experience how to mana such MIL

She sounds like my MIL exactly, she is a narcissistic. Only difference being it's more than a decade since i am dealing with her negativity. I did not know this is called the gray rock method 😂 but i've been doing this since a little while as this is the only thing i can do to keep my sanity. I haven't made eye contact with her since...i don't know when 😂😂 i don't ask anything about her nor do i tell her anything about myself. But now she drag everyone into it and portrays me as the worst person she has ever met in her life, but now everyone's opinion about me doesn't matter to me 😊

Thank you.

Same thing mam mere sath bilkul aise hi horaha hai

Thank you mam for this suggestion ☺️

Khud SAAS बनने ke baad bhi ek video बनना tab देखेंगे tumhari tips kitni kaam karti hai .. 😂

Don't worry when you will become a mother-in-law, your daughter-in-law will also use this technique against you!

Thank you

My mil was very difficult and toxic.now I am suffering with bp stress and high cholesterol

How to minimize talk with her, wo to bed room m akar bhi taunt Mar jati h. Koi privacy Nam ki cheez hi nhi h.

Good afternoon Mam whatever you told I listen all to that but it is that I have a different situation where I got married to a different community we belong to same Hindu culture but the communities are different I am Kashmiri Pandit and my husband is Haryanvi Pandit my in laws have an expectation that I will behave like a maid at home but I can't do that as I am a pampered child right from my beginning so I can't fulfill their expectations and secondly their culture is very different from my culture my father in law is very straightforward and he is very abusive for ladies my mother-in-law is strong headed and she always pretends different before my husband that is very tough for me all the time as we are away from them means we don't live with them but I was there with my in laws for 1 and half year and they behave very differently with me as the expectation was like I will behave like and made for them means 24 hours I have to work like and made that I am not able to do because of my health issues so I just want that they will behave ok with me whenever I will go to their place but that don't happen and some fights always happen when ever I am with them please tell me is this solution that you gave in the video this is that same for me