Miyavi hit the nail on the head with what I’m feeling: “As long as I was playing, I wanted to be number 1. I didn’t know how, but that’s what I wanted. Not getting where I wanted to be. Realizing that if I kept doing what I was doing, I wouldn’t get to where I wanted. There was this conflict growing inside of me. So obviously, the bigger the difference between what you want and what you’re actually doing, the bigger the suffering. Like your mind and body are separate. What I was saying and what I was doing were two different things.” This is exactly me. I watched the rest and so glad I did. This was a catalyst for me to just do me, not get complacent, and keep going up. It’s past 4am and I’m so glad I randomly woke up and this randomly popped up on my feed.
I couldn't agreed more about the part when you're serious about becoming professional you take upon the burden (not intentionally) to make anything happen in your team but they seem to be "too" relaxed and you will second guess, "Why am I doing all of this, alone? Wasted so much energy, dedication and efforts to become something" and you lose hope but faith kept you going. Learned this from previous experiences too. Miyavi is one hell of a strong guy to come out victorious!
"So I kept getting more depressed until I decided to die.But then I couldn't do anything..." "But even if I did nothing,i couldn't stop my thoughts.So what could I do?"- OH GOD!!it's as if he just read my mind!this is EXACTLY what I used to think and feel pretty damn much a lot!..honestly,i still do sometimes but yeah huh..
