Two main (and great) interpretations of the song I've heard in the comments: aromantic mood or just being afraid of relationships because of seeing broken ones. I say why not both? Why not that aro feeling of not getting why people put that much effort into relationships if they don't know it will last? That's what I always thought when I saw people dating growing up. There's a special kind of cynicism about romantic relationships that comes with being aro, because sometimes you don't even get why it's appealing to other people at all. I sometimes find myself asking why people care so much about finding a partner when it's so much work and heartache, and from my view there's nothing you can do with a partner you can't do with friends with less heartache.
YES!! I was thinking this exact thing but you out it marvelously into words. In my experience being aro, I interpret my view on relationships as "I dont get the positive aspects from romance, so the negatives are overwhelming. And why would I do something that would only have negatives for me"
I think a big problem and one of the main reasons that so many married couples end up resenting each other is because of amatonormativity. Since romantic love is seen as the most important and meaningful kind of love, people often think that if they don't find a romantic partner they're going to end up alone and unhappy, so I think people tend to rush too quickly into marriage because of that. And, since they are convinced romantic love is the most important kind, they often end up neglecting their other relationships. They become distant with their friends, to the point where they're more just acquaintances than friends, and their partner becomes pretty much their only source of emotional support. Think about it; how many married couples do you know who still regularly keep in touch with and hang out with their friends? Do they still have someone besides their partner that they consider their *best* friend? No, probably not, because their spouse/kids are now always their number one priority and they don't want to waste time or energy on relationships they don't think are important enough. Now, I'm no expert, but I feel like it's probably unhealthy to be relying on just one person for all your emotional needs for your entire life. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm betting that's a big factor in why married couples end up being so angry at each other all the time.
I discovered Mother Mother just a few months through Spotify so I feel kind of dumb for being surprised to discover that this song is also in O My Heart. It’s a shame it’s been removed from Spotify, this song absolutely slaps
When I see lovers in the park Making a start Making their little love spark I don't get heart heavy Heart heavy Heart heavy When I see lovers in the rain Under the same umbrella In a picture frame I don't get heart heavy Heart heavy Heart heavy 'Cause there's a man and a woman next door And they don't make no love they just go to war Oh-ee Yeah yeah When I see lovers on the street With their hands in their hands And a synched heartbeat I don't wish that were me That were me That were me When I see two young pops Sitting in a malt shop Drinking out of one cup With two straws and one lung I don't get thirsty Get thirsty Not getting thirsty 'Cause there's a man and a woman next door And they don't make no love they just go to war Oh-ee And there's a man and a woman outside And they don't breathe the air They're just breathing fire And a man and a woman upstairs And he just pulls his teeth While she pulls her hair And it's the love inside the treasury tape And I know I don't wanna make the same mistake As the man and the woman next door 'Cause they don't make no love they just go to war Oh-ee Don't sink Not heavy Don't sink because my heart's not heavy Don't sink Not heavy Don't sink because my heart's not heavy
I have listened to ALL the song from Mother Mother, HOW COULD I HAVE MISSED THIS??? Well, either way Its good to discover another one of their songs. I love Mother Mother
Don't let bad examples of love deter you from happiness. Healthy and stable relationships exist, they just take time, effort, and communication. Remember that.
@@itsthatonechickagaincallth7843 I completely agree, I just wanted any aces or aros that see this to know that they are valid and theres nothing wrong with them :)
I find this song relatable because since i was small i said that i won't ever get married, because i don't want to be trapped in a bad marriage like my parents. This song explains my feelings to every couple
I feel the same. I can't just see marriage anymore as something nice. I still sometimes think of someone hugging me, but the other stuff? Well, hell no.
@@itskitkat1209 by released I mean in the album and on other streaming serviceses. There are TONNES of Mother Mother songs that are on youtube and no where else
I feel like this song could be too about someone who finally got a couple for themselves, so they don’t wish to be other couples anymore, now that they have their own partner. The part about the couple next door, I think it could be that they feel glad they have a nice relationship with their couple, but they are afraid of their relationship becoming like that. But hey!, everyone can assume what they like. I’m just a lonely asexual person trying to find another meaning to this song even if they can relate to the most obvious meaning
Is it possible to overdose on validation? Bc you guys are making me feel so INCREDIBLY valid rn. You, reading this comment, you are valid, and deserve all the platonic love you could ever desire ❤️
When listening to heart heavy and neighbour u notice that mother mother its such an awesome band and that their neighbors don't seem to be good people.
I notice a lot of people saying this song having to do with someone being aromantic. However, I see it more as being pisanthrophobic. Pistanthrophobia is a phobia of getting hurt by someone in a romantic relationship. And what I hear being described in the song hints to it, especially the line,"'Cause there's a man and a woman next door And they don't make no love they just go to war." They've seen what is behind the scenes of a relationship. They know that it isn't as it seems and would prefer to avoid it completely.
As an aroace, I see this song as more of like "I don't get why people wanna get in romantic relationships at all because it always seems like it turns out like this." Obviously that's not always the case (just look at Jammi Dodger and his wife Shaaba! BICONS!!), but this song pretty much summarizes everything I don't get about romantic relationships lmao. That being said, I definitely agree with what you said. Art is subjective and means different things to different people (that's the beauty of it!)
This song is perfect for me, because I have *those* parents and *that* relationship with love. AND I can’t feel romantic or sexual attraction because I’m aroace!
As opposed to all of the aroace people here, I am a hopeless romantic who has been single for too long. I like this song because te reminds me that I don't need a relationship to be happy.
@Jackson I don't see anything wrong with being aro/ace and relating to this song, but I wouldn't go as far to say that this song's about that The narrator is showing example of *why* they don't want a relationship, because they're saying from what they've seen, that this illusion of "love" doesn't end up the way people say it will. the narrator is clearly saying that something deters and puts them off from having a relationship, not that they don't experience attraction..
Lyrics from metrolyrics When I see lovers in the park Making a start Making their little love spark I don't get heart heavy Heart heavy Heart heavy When I see lovers in the rain Under the same umbrella In a picture frame I don't get heart heavy Heart heavy Heart heavy 'Cause there's a man and a woman next door And they don't make no love they just go to war Oh-ee Yeah yeah When I see lovers on the street With their hands in their hands And a synched heartbeat I don't wish that were me That were me That were me When I see two young pops Sitting in a malt shop Drinking out of one cup With two straws and one lung I don't get thirsty Get thirsty Not getting thirsty 'Cause there's a man and a woman next door And they don't make no love they just go to war Oh-ee And there's a man and a woman outside And they don't breathe the air They're just breathing fire And a man and a woman upstairs And he just pulls his teeth While she pulls her hair And it's the love inside the treasury tape And I know I don't wanna make the same mistake As the man and the woman next door 'Cause they don't make no love they just go to war Oh-ee Don't sink Not heavy Don't sink because my heart's not heavy Don't sink Not heavy Don't sink because my heart's not heavy
it's so damn wild to me that they're getting mad exposure right now through tiktok. they deserve a lot of love so i'm glad for them! i hope people can explore further than hayloft though lol
I think this song is about a person hiding from love in a shell, because they're scared of their heart being broken, and no longer being in love, like the couple next-door. They keep their heart empty, so they don't sink.
This is kind of a hot take but,,, here's my theory on the song, I feel like rather than being about an Aro/Ace person, It's about someone who's parents were always fighting, and since that was the only example they had ever seen of any type of romantic relationship, it made them to scared to be in any type of relationship themselves, in fear of constantly fighting, and having an over-all very unhealthy relationship, with their partner.
Your theory would make it two reasons I listen to this song. My parents are being called out with your theory and how it makes me view the worlds and romantic relationships On the other hand I am genuinely on the aromantic spectrum and don't understand how people get crushes or feel this romantic attraction because I tried so hard through middle school to make up crushes to try and feel what others kept craving. Didn't work.
people saying this song is an aro/ace mood when when I found this song when I was 12 and since then I've interpreted it as like someone trying to convince themself that they're not sad at the loss of an abusive partner that they still definitely love
I'm asexual by nature and sometimes aromantic by choice, that is not to say that aromanticism is a choice but the past couple of years I've been interrogating myself on how much the concept of love and romance is a natural thing just as much as it's a social construct, I wish I could find an answer, in the meantime I really resonate with this song
I relate to this song heavily, but from a non aro-ace prespective. I've expirienced not only my parents, but also my friends going through toxic relationships because they rush into the relationship or just dont communicate well, so I had become known as the "relationship advice" friend, and I gained a reputation of not being interested in relationships. Most of my irl friends had developed a crush on me at one point and I had declined. Not necessarily because I wasnt interested at all, but I just knew how sudden relationships like this played out. And honestly, I kinda prided myself in it for awhile. But from my prespective, when the artist repetitively uses lines like "don't sink. not heavy. don't sink because my heart's not heavy." it sorta represents denial. Like deep down behind all the protective barriers is really a jealous individual who wants to expirience the love everyone else I know does, and am just trying to convince myself and everyone else otherwise. But I dont let myself because I know that, in the long run, I'll regret it. Im not usually a pessimist, but I see many people viewing this in a positive light because it reminds them they don't need to be in a relationship to be happy, which is a mindset I've been trying to grow into, but personally this song does the opposite to me? Like the ending of the song always makes me tear up for some reason. Especially since its right after the lyrics showing the denial, it just has a really lonely atmosphere to it. I dunno, maybe its just me lol
I know, this song has been put onto many aro/ace playlists BUT that's not what this song is about. You could interpret this song as being an aro/ace song but it's instead about how one can no longer want love/marriage due to not wanting to be like "the man and woman next door" or be in a relationship where it's more bad than good. The person in this song sings about how when seeing couples, they no longer see the positives in the relationship/no longer get bittersweet when seeing them. *This is not to hate on aro/ace people. I myself am one. I usually have more analytical and logical standpoints on things and this isn't meant to offend anyone.*
According to azlyrics this song is an iTunes exclusive so I searched the iTunes store and didn't find it. Where can I buy this song? I really really want it for an aromantic playlist I'm making.
Hey, I searched for an hour but I couldn't find it anywhere myself. I recommend messaging their record label asking them or go the easy way and pirate it yourself.
Nope, still not on iTunes. Very sad too, this would've been an amazing outro. Sleep Awake is good too though. I don't know if messaging their record label will really do anything, because I'm pretty sure they signed onto another four years ago (the last record they did with Last Gang Records was 'The Sticks'). We'll just have to download it from RU-vid and anywhere else it is.
so did anyone else think this song was about being cynical and fearing relationships (and love in general) bcos you dont want to end up like those couples that STAY at each other's throats and suffer in a toxic relationship or was that just me? 😔 (/lh)
Man, you're not alone. I too am afraid of relationships and love in general because of traumatic experiences. I already have it in my subconscious that it can't be good with people. And it's horrible.
Hot take, but IMO this is more about just wanting to avoid abusive/toxic relationships than being aro, or if it is about being aro, it’s more just the perspective of seeing people in unhealthy relationships and not understanding why anyone would want to be in a relationship with that potential when you already don’t want that in general.;
misckat i mean, sure, but the feeling i get from those interpretations is that being aro is preferable because love is either unattainable or scary. being aro/ace is fine by me though
@@altf4undo01 yeah depends i guess on the interpretation. as an aro/ace person this song makes me feel kinda safe? like im not missing out on anything bc its not all its cracked up to be anyway.
Exactly, I'm fine with aro people but like if you actually listen to the song and the lyrics you understand it's because they want to avoid the domestic abuse and toxicity that you can see behind the scenes of relationships. I think it's actually damaging to think this is the "aro anthem" because it implies that you do not experience romantic attraction because you've been abused rather than just not having that drive
@@nuggetboi6318 I think that depends on the interpretation of the song. Because when I first heard it that wasnt my takeaway. Also there actually are people who identify as ace due to trauma, bc sexuality is fluid and they currently feel ace. Make of that as you will but I dont think its bad for songs to mean different things to different people :)