Finally! Don & Phena get through Ntheo, a Kamba traditional marriage clincher:
Have you fallen in love or you are in a serious relationship that could lead to marriage with a Kamba lady? If the answer is perhaps yes, then prepare yourself for a series of courtship rituals, some of which have endured even in the face of rising modernity. And in most cases it will not matter whether you plan to wed in a church or after any other faith or even under the customary law.
The bottom line is the groom and his kin must meet some basic requirements and perform specific rituals highly regarded among the Kamba community as minimum threshold for a typical legitimate marriage.
As a matter of fact, the rituals have been viciously preserved throughout generations, and still remain a significant identity and cultural value revered by everyone in the community, their social class notwithstanding. For instance, before a marriage ceremony is conducted, the groom (with his kin) must throw an important party popularly referred to as Ntheo.
Ntheo is actually the minimum requirement that demonstrates the bride officially belongs to the man she is engaged to.
What it involves So what does ntheo entail? An ordinary ntheo ceremony must involve at least three goats, one of which must be a he-goat that is un-castrated.
However, you may have more than three goats but the rule is that the number of the animals to be presented to the bride’s family for the purpose of ntheo must add up to an odd number. This means the goats may be five, seven, nine and so on but not four or six! During this ceremony, only a handful close relatives of both sides of families are involved.
The he-goat is then slaughtered by the groom, or alternatively a brother to the groom.
It is believed that as soon as blood of the he-goat spills on the ground, the bride becomes ‘officially owned’ by the groom that very moment. But it does not end there. A piece of soft meat popularly known as kikonde, extracted from the slaughtered goat is given to both the bride and groom, who must eat at least a piece each as ‘an oath’ that they will keep the covenant of their marriage.
In case ntheo ceremony is carried out before a marriage ceremony like it is the case in most Christian marriages, the bride is deemed to already ‘lawfully’ belong to her fiancée under Kamba customary law. And even if there is no church ceremony the two are deemed married. Once food is served to those present at the ceremony, women and children are issued with soft drinks while men who are considered mature are served with Kaluvu, the Kamba traditional beer.
It is important to note it is the groom’s responsibility to ensure both types of drinks are made available in acceptable quality and quantity.
Once the ntheo ceremony is done, the process of ‘buying a wife’ begins there and then. The bride’s kin are to present the numerous items the bride’s family will require as dowry. However, these items may be paid through installments that are usually negotiated at friendly basis by the two sides of the families. Dowry is what is popularly referred to as ngasya.
Coming on the top of the list of items for ngasya are 48 goats, which must eventually be delivered to the bride’s family. This means, for instance, if the groom used three goats for the ntheo ceremony, he is left with an outstanding balance of 45 goats.
"Kamba is the most beautiful culture in Kenya" Don
"No other place I would have found myself, except the Luhya tradition. The most celebrated in Kenya" Phena.
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Credits : Background song: Nandy - Ninogeshe / Ngomma VAS
17 сен 2024
