I was just officially diagnosed as NVLD last year when I was 55 years old. Although my High School was mostly white I got my Bachelors and Masters degrees at black university. I got my degrees in special education and urban education. I hated math especially Algebra but my weakness is reading people's facial expressions and body language. I taught in Jersey City, New Brunswick and Paterson and I burned out hard. The guidance councilor at the school I work at said I might have Aspergers. I did 2 years of Roller Derby but I suck hard at sports. I started acting 7 years ago. I was told over and over that I really should be a comedian cuz I have natural talent for it. So ever since I've been following Chris Rock and his career.
I was diagnosed with NLD when I was 18. High school was terrible because nobody knew my actual diagnosis, math was difficult, and having friends was a challenge. Thanks for telling your story
I was diagnosed with NVLD 3 years ago ( at age 28), right on the cusp of the pandemic & I was in denial about it, with the lock down and lives lost it took my attention off my struggles and my problems. Now that I am back at work , I've noticed a lot of struggles brought on by NVLD ( My memory retention, reading body cues, taking things too literal, getting lost in conversation and feeling anxious in conversation- among other things) I'm pretty sure I always had NVLD in my younger years, but I was pretty good at winging it in social settings as well as academically . I'm at the age where "winging" it is becoming EXHAUSTING and I really need resources and coping skills for my everyday life. Finding relatable videos about this disorder has been a struggle, but I 100% related to everything you said. Thank you so much for sharing! If anyone can recommend any articles, podcasts, books (etc) geared around living with NVLD, that would be so awesome.
I was diagnosed with NVLD when I was 25. I am now 41. Thank you for making this video. There aren’t many videos about NVLD. I can relate to a lot of what you talk about. When I moved to a different house in a different town it took me almost a month to remember which roads to take. I would count how many treads there were until Ingot to mine. Lol. I always try to go to a location a few days beforehand to make sure I know how to get there and don’t get lost. I stick to a routine. I’m very good at languages. I want to learn all of the languages but It’m just learning Spanish right now. I was in French immersion during all of my school years. I find when I get overly stressed I shut down. I felt like I had to work a lot harder than everyone else and I still didn’t do as well as them. It was so frustrating. I’m constantly talking to myself. I find that I have to read and hear something to remember it. I find it difficult to follow oral instructions if there is more than one.
One of my biggest social issues as a 22 year old with this is talking at inappropriate volumes. I've been told even in a quiet voice that my pitch naturally carries somehow. It's very embarrassing because if I'm trying to talk to a friend quietly about something personal my emotions can stir and I wind up telling the whole world with no recognition of my volume. I really have a lot of trouble understanding how loud my voice is, even if I'm focusing on listening closely to keep it in check. If anyone has any advice I'm sure I'm not the only one who could use it!
I wish I did have some advice. I've been doing this since I was a kid. I've just tried to practice being aware of my volume/excitment level, but if I'm excited I can get really loud without realizing it. If possible maybe go somewhere private to talk.
exact same thing happens to me, i feel like my friends are embarrassed of the volume of my voice or how much i get into what i’m talking about. it makes me want to not talk sometimes
Hey! I learned a little trick that might help us. Visualization works really well for me. Picturing that I'm speaking quietly into the ear of someone in front of me the past few days has seriously helped and I hope it helps you, too! Also if anyone has trouble with weaving while walking (not walking straight,) I've found picturing a train track all the way ahead and walking on it helps tremendously. God bless you guys!
I end up speaking barely above a whisper a lot of the time because I know that I’ll accidentally end up shouting if I don’t. Unfortunately that means people can barely hear me a lot of the time lol
Newly diagnosed with NVLD (at age 30) here! Your video was so helpful. When you said "I was never as good as I should have been," I really felt that. Wishing you all the best for your future endeavors!!!
NVLD's unite:) Hi Mathew, it's so interesting to hear from other people with this disorder. I found myself nodding along with this ALOT. Especially relating to struggles with math/directions/organization. Have you had a hard time with driving? i also find it really fascinating how it can actually be a strength in certain areas. I'd be interested to know what kinds of things you feel help with the stress/anxiety part of things. I also find international relations fascinating!
Dear Mathew-Thank you so much for making this video. I have a 19 yr old son with NVLD and I probably have a mild form of NVLD as well. Your honesty and courage touch me. I just wanted to say I admire your courage and honesty. I see a light of divinity in your expression and thoughts. You have innocence and honesty. Wanted to wish you all the best. Please keep going. We are all made differently and there is nothing or no-one who is 'perfect' or 'typical'. Remember the John Audubon quote-The woods would be very silent if no birds sang except those than sang the best! Keep fighting and keep chugging along! You'll be fine brother. God bless!
I have NVLD. Very good video-thank you! I worked as a Chemical Dependency Counselor-it was hell because of my impaired executive function. I felt like Lucille Ball on crack. I never had a 40hr work week-because I was always behind. I worked in several different settings thinking it might be more manageable here than there. I was bullied by coworkers and feel into a depression. I ended up working in case management and utilization review-loving the case management but not the UR-who wants to fight insurance companies all week? I can totally relate to your realizations that somethings just aren’t going to be possible-like shooting. I ended up moving across the country and working in a forensic hospital where I was injured in Oct 2016. So I’m taking my time to heal before diving into what’s next because I want it to be successful. I really appreciated hearing this!!! Best of luck to you in your new career venture:)!
Thanks man!! I wish you all the luck. Keep your head up and keep charging. It can be tough at times. Sounds like your pretty resilient though... you got this. Keep me posted.
I was diagnosed as a child when my mom was diagnosed with bipolar disorder so i got lost in all of her coping until i got out of my own head and stopped mimicking her for social cues. Clumsy all my life and issues with right and left navigation which makes driving difficult on a daily basis because i like to take the same route and half the time its blocked of not possible with most ppl dont understand when i explain it to them. I adore books and always have one with me as a comfort if i need it in a stressful moment. Math is my mortal enemy! My fiancé loves guns but shooting with him is hard because half the time i cannot find the target, much less hit it. Despite all of the social awkwardness and fiddling with things nervously when i am not dropping them, i have some really great friends who have not given up on me even though i didn’t have a name for how my brian works up until a few weeks ago when i found some old papers from childhood on NVLD given to me by a doctor. I may be awkward with most situations and feel things differently than i probably should socially. My anxiety may hit me like a train when i wake up in the morning about the activities of the day but i have my foundation and my friends and family who love me and i love them all even if i cannot show them on a normal emotional level. Not to focus on the negative here, because of the way My brain works i have learned how cope and get through those odd situations that i get lost in. It flexes my brain to do it and since the brain is also a muscle... its gotta be strong. That took an odd turn so i will end my rant. Thank you for the video on a personal perspective rather than all the clinical videos on this disorder.
Thank you for your video. My daughter has NVLD. She is 10 and we have dealt with group bullying, Inflexible teachers, and iep issues. Therapy and calming strategies are helpful. I wanna fight for her and others to get NVLD accepted as a diagnosis, so accommodations can be made in schools, workplaces, and insurance coverage for treatments like therapy. I just haven't figured out how yet.
Julianna Barnes I’m right there with you!! There are some resources out there but not enough. Thanks for your input. I also was bullied to varying degrees in my school career. However not severely ever.
I was able to get accommodations in graduate school with an NLD diagnosis. Just talk to the disability coordinator, and make sure you have your documentation. (I was diagnosed at age 26, so no opportunity for accommodations earlier. The only useful accommodation in my case, but one that was extremely useful, was being able to type essay exams rather than having to write by hand.)
I am a relatively high-functioning NVLD person and am about to pursue a masters degree in something I know I am not necessarily built for but feel the need to do it because it in theory interests me and I'm bored with what I do currently. I really hope it works out for me but I know deep-down that it''ll involve a lot of fight. Really hope it goes well.
Thank you so much for making these videos! Just hearing your story is so encouraging. My daughter was diagnosed with this disorder, and I'm pretty sure I also have it.
Thanks for the video, my son was just diagnosed today so I'm just now learning of the disorder. My wife and I always had our suspicions that something wasn't right so now I know to be more patient with my son.
Thanks for sharing your experience with NVLD. I have a 23 year old son who is struggling with finding a career that suits his strengths. It’s challenging. He has also had a tough time finding a good way to learn. He’s very bright, but he works really hard just to get average results.
Mathew Daniels Well, he tests extremely high in analytical and mathematical concepts, but he got a D in college in Calculus. He could do the homework, but couldn’t identify what concept he was suppose to use on the exam. We also went to a career consultant and he scored off the charts, she called testing company to verify his scores, and “qualified” for engineering jobs, medical doctor jobs, etc., but he lost his clerical job at a “bibliotech” library because you have to relate to younger kids and promote return business. He has problems with working memory and social skills, but he is very bright. We’re encouraging him to investigate different jobs on RU-vid, by talking to professionals, etc. and then just trying a few jobs out or getting online certification or an associate degree for a specific career, as opposed to his bachelors.
I was just diagnosed with NVLD at age 55. This disorder has shaped my whole life, sometimes in good ways but more often in negative ways. People at my job get exasperated with me when I get confused in the hustle and bustle. I've made serious blunders at work which have almost gotten me fired. I have trouble with relationships and have spent my whole life alone. I see things in black and white (all or nothing) instead of shades of gray. And I tend to dwell on the negative things in my life which leads to depression and anxiety., both of which I'm medicated for.
Look forward to watching more of your videos. Gave me hope for when he grows up. My son was diagnosed with NVLD and ADHD in March. He is 6. We just got an IEP set up for school this upcoming year. Could relate that he is very verbal and he memorizes a lot things. He will memorize reading assignments from listening to his teacher, but struggled when I actually made him go back and read it out of order. Appreciate you making these videos and sharing how you cope with it and strategies to help.
Nice to find a video about NVLD as it's experienced by adults. Just a reminder: while there are general characteristics of NVLD, the symptoms can vary a lot. I relate to some of what Mathew relates about his experience, but not at all to others. For example, I'm very verbal and have always been bad at math, but I can shoot well (so I was told at a gun club once), and I have a strong sense of direction. Just to assure people that you can still have NVLD and not have the exact same set of symptoms. The only way to know if you have NVLD is to get evaluated by a qualified professional. Some NVLD symptoms overlap with those of conditions like ADHD and even high-functioning Autism Spectrum Disorder, among others, so you have to go through the testing to really know. I see that some people use the "D" to stand for "disorder," while others use it for "disability." The terms aren't synonyms, and I'd like to know what the correct term is. On NVLD.org they say "disability."
Thank you for your video! You did a great job helping me understand a little more about NVLD. Our psychologist is suspecting that my daughter has NVLD and ADHD. I was diagnosed with ADHD as an adult. Looking back I believe that this may apply to me as well. I can relate to a lot of the things you were talking about. There isn’t much information on this so I appreciate your channel.
I relate having NVLD, Matthew! Strengths always been languages, history & audio skills (music, imitation & rote memory) whereas the math & sciences are just ugly (Esp. money.) But nvld really does keep ya strong. Thanks for sharing.
As far as school subjects, I was not naturally "good" at any subject (even languages) because of NVLD. BUT, I excelled at pretty much EVERY subject in school because of ROTE LEARNING. I took calculus, APs in high school, and went to a competitive four year where I studied language and communication. Obviously, don't go crazy and lose out on a life because of all the repetition. But if you go over any concept enough times in a style that makes sense to you, you can "learn" anything. Better yet, I found because of NVLD that when I learned something ( even though it took me longer) I understood the concept inside and out. It's something I carry with me today. Once someone with NVLD has the understanding of a concept, their verbal skills blow other people away. It's very much an advantage academically and presents itself in writing as well. Hope this adds some perspective or is helpful for other NVLD'ers.
I just shared this on a veteran's Facebook group, as I stood, shoulder-to-shoulder, dress right dress, with a vet who was feeling humiliated to ask for help due to his TBI, and NVLD closely mimics a TBI in many ways. Then another one popped up, a female, who thinks she has NVLD.
You’re experience sounds just like me. I feel seen. Math literally can’t process in my brain at all. I always felt alone like there weren’t others out there like me. Thank you for making this video.
thank you so much for this video. ive had a diagnosed NVLD since 5yrs old. NVLDs need to be talked about more because so many people don't acknowledge their existence. people I considered my closest friends told me that my disorder wasn't real and went on to bully me and purposefully make it so i couldnt understand things and/or exclude me and not tell me why. people with NVLDs tend to be picked on by the assholes of the world. im glad to know that more people have this because i thought i was one of the only ones. thank you for this video :)
Thank you for making this video. I was diagnosed at 45 y/o. Once I got the diagnosis it explained my whole life! I would love to connect with other NVLD'ers that are adults. It doesn't seem like there are a lot of resources availible for adults.
Twice as long to learn and once you've got it, it's mastered - that's very much me as a French teacher. I haven't been diagnosed with this but holy does it explain so much. At this point, I'm not sure if I've ever even really had adhd. I feel like I have excellent visuospatial awareness awareness though, or at least in the way I can visualize 3D objects and interior design, and I quickly memorize maps of where I'm at. Good dexterity as well, in terms of playing guitar and doing acrobatics. I have horrible organization, and can't accurately predict the time tasks will take. I can't understand non-verbal accurately either. I jump to conclusions that are delusional, so I need to physically hear things from people and be spoon fed opinions and reactions. This is compounded with the fact that I'm a bit hard of hearing. I did terrible in jr high and high school. I can do great mental arithmetic but beyond that, it gets fuzzy for algebra and stats. Seems like your IQ is probably too high for the police/military lol. No offence to them, but I know I'd rock the boat for sure, and they don't like that. Now I'm doing two masters, almost done the first and I'm going to be my schools vice principal. I tend to take too much on at once - that's something I'd caution, feeling like you can take on the world. Thanks for sharing your perspective.
Yup get lost all the time! Dyslexic too but I believe NVLD has a lot to do with being lost lol like pointing left when someone tells me to turn right.I cannot read a map to save my life,thank goodness for gps!
Thanks for sharing. Got diagnosed with nvld in my midthirties. It was a relief really. And now I dont feel haunted by the brand of intelligent but kinda stupid that I have gotten my whole life. Hope you are doing well too.
Thanks, Mathew for this video. I've not been diagnosed with NVLD, but I'm pretty sure i suffer from it. I am in my 60s and have developed "fancy" and elaborate coping skills over the years to help me. I'm not good at how long a particular task will take me, which is usually 2x as long as it should. I have trouble with my right and left. I can learn a dance step but the instructor must be facing away from me. If i get lost while driving, I have to talk to myself, reasoning out which way to go. I have little to no depth perception, but navigate through space using other visual clues. I did horribly on my SAT and ACTs because my eyes would skip a row, so all of my answers were probably right, but for the wrong questions! am clumsy. I can do "Where's Waldo" on a screen or on a page of a book, but dump a bunch of objects onto a desk and ask me to find it - ha! My math skills are marginal, but I love to read, write and learn about different cultures/histories. But it does make you feel kind of stupid, even though people like us are usually very intelligent. Good video!
This video makes me feel ,,belonging'' to a certain tribe of peole, thanks Mathew and everyone for sharing your experiences, in my country NVLD is not diagnosed, I'm rather like a somobody who doesn't want to change to perform better, half of my life is a comedy second part a disaster but I keep going , love languages, gardening, books and animals this things rescue me
Thank you for sharing! I was diagnosed in August 2022 2 months shy of my 34th birthday when I was getting evaluated for ADHD. Still trying to figure out how this has impacted my life and how I can move forward.
I was diagnosed with NVLD in my early 30’s and now I’m 38. The only big problem with having NVLD is getting a women to except me for who I am and wanting a Romantic relationship with me. When you tell them you didn’t go to college or you only have a average job making $57,000 a year they run away.
I was JUST diagnosed with NVLD and "Specific Learning Disorder with impairment in Math" last month AND.. "Other Specified Attention- Deficit/ Hyperactivity Disorder, Mild variability in attention possibly associated with NLD symptoms." "Other Specified Specified Anxiety Disorder , subclinical for Generalized Anxiety Disorder." I am 33 years old... and YES, driving is SUPER HARD FOR ME... ALWAYS STRESSFUL AND GETTING LOST..😟
You and I have a lot in common. I was diagnosed in first grade with "SOMETHING", but they couldn't say what "it" vvas. The pediatrician said that on the scale, thirteen was considered significant learning disability, I was a 40! Shooting's something I'm pretty good at, but growing up in Alabama, that was a way of life! Thank you for putting this out there! I'm on some serious medication for anxiety and depression and in therapy for self-esteem issues. I'd love to meet you someday and talk!
@@mathewdaniels2640, well I was sent to an alternative high school ( at which this point the school psychologist at my original high school new i was autistic but was an asshole and never told me). I was bullied for 10 years in my mainstream school and professionals never did anything ( because they were trying to hide the fact that i was autistic so they didn't have to pay for more testing). I took psychology courses in college and I had studied enough about autism that I was like... I think this is me, and i backed tracked to my IEP and it said NVLD, repetitive behaviors, OCD and no friends. People with NVLD don't have repetitive behaviors ... so I figured I was autistic on my own. I had failed a few colleges but I found out online college is remotely better of me because everything is open book. It has taken me 8 years to get through college, and I wasn't originally supposed to graduate or live past 17. I have Coped by being myself and if no one likes that then oh well
Great vid, very clarifying how NVLD can work out in daily life. What strikes me is that you seem to have (very) good social skills, which are often not well developed in people with NVLD because they can have problems with interpreting non-verbal cues. Did you ever have problems with this and did you overcome it or was it never an issue for you?
Struggled and still struggle a ton with math. I have no sense of direction/get lost easily. Really good with English(writing, vocab, reading). School was challenging academically and socially
I had this diagnosed with NLD when I was 17 and now I’m only looking into this at age 20 my ADD is there also . I’m good at math strangely , good at most subjects. I’m great at languages . My brain was very slow to develop and I’m still behind my peers
Hi Mathew, thank you for sharing your story. I have a 12 year old with NVLD and as parents we are trying to understand his challenges and we are helping him in school with that. Your video makes a difference for many people who are coping with NVLD I guess. Are you familiar with NVLD.org?
I also have NVLD. Additionally, I have depression and ptsd. What specifically was difficult about shooting? I had a really hard time with soccer as a kid. Was great at the individual skills, but couldn’t figure out the layout of the field when playing a game.
Ah, bad with math, forgetfulness, yes this is sounding quite familiar. I can't say I've ever picked up a language particularly quickly - I know a fair amount of big words in English, though! :P I've known I've had this disorder since I was a kid, but...never have quite worked out a great way to handle it overall. Life has this tendency to throw situations at you that do not suit your strengths at all when you've got this disorder, I think. People expect a normal performance, and you just kind of have to muddle through in a lot of cases. Feels like I'm not built for most things.
Hi. My son is 11 yrs old and was diagnosed with non-verbal learning dificulties and is allways irritable and also angry towards study and also peers in school. Did this happened to you in school? If so what helped you? Thanks and be well.
Math sucks im terrible with directions. Body language i will be honest i used have issues but around my teens i began learning them observing basically and literally thought myself and imitated it whats good whats bad etc. Reading out loud helps audio books too. Diagnosed at 14 im 32 now. Incredible at history politics and i have a small circle of friends.
Diagnosis age approximately 43 when in divorce stage sought out psychologist to rule out Asperger syndrome, which was ruled out but diagnosis NLD aka NVLD!. For sixteen years treated for ADD because no treatment medically for NLD (methylphenidate is a nootropic drug but is not effective with primary diagnosis) .Have dropped that to Vinpocetine another nootropic view by FDA as vitamin supplement! Vinpocetine know best for help with cognitive function though not United States verified! Started meager journal on its effectiveness. Thank you for initial response!
I hate adhd and IAnd a learning problem it’s really sad because this will not go away I thought I left it behind in high school yet it follows me into my job I had a hard time learning and I quit my job because of it
I’m the same. I adore languages, I study Japanese by myself and have been for 8.5 years. I want to learn other languages too at one point. In Canada, we need to learn French for a certain amount of years and I did traffic in it. I would’ve loved to continue it but my level wasn’t available. I loved English class in high school. I wanted to be an ECE, a person who helps with kids. I had so many issues to the point I had to drop out of college. I get stressed with basic stuff sometimes and get frustrated. I am horrible at math but I took a different program in college at one point and had to take a finical class and got about a 75 percent.
NVLD+ASD here. My experience with the "forgetting" is a little bit nuanced: my parents and several of my peers think I have a very good memory, but it's directed at details. I kind of can forget the big picture (or I wouldn't have noticed it in the first place). Also, there's not something like visual memory for me: everything is abstract. Also, I can confuse two concepts in memory, sometimes in very weird ways. But I wouldn't say I have bad memory overall. I actually did extremely well for sciences (I got 100% for chemistry once) and languages (except French, but I'm learning it now as an adult), and usually very poorly in mathematics. But during my student years, I could more accurately see where the problems are. For example, for mathematics, integrals are extremely difficult (even low to moderately difficult integrals are for me very, very hard), but group theory was a breeze while it looked more difficult for others. In physics, solving 1st year university problems about kinetics and dynamics was for me always a disaster, but understanding the theory usually saved my ass. Later, more "advanced" theories based on other, more abstract principles (wave theory, quantum mechanics, special relativity) was weirdly enough easier for me to understand. Learning the rules of a game: total disaster! I had to quit speleology because I can't tie knots, which is essential in this discipline if you want to live. Last but not least: I gathered 2 higher education degrees, did a PhD (but messed it up right at the end), did music academy and what not, but once I had to take an entry test for a government job, I failed miserably. I was told it's not uncommon for NVLD and/or ASD people to gather degrees like stamps, but flunk.when you're in the working environment where the stakes are a lot higher, and test are made with a specific "corporate" goal in mind.
My son has been diagnosed with NVLD. He has completely shut down and isolated himself. He is 17 and he is very angry at everyone. He is brilliant but he is very stressed out. Any advice on how I can help him?
Hello sir! Thank you very much for your videos. I find that very informative and helpful. I have made a few videos of my own on the NVLD subject; would you mind taking a look and possibly subscribing and commenting? Maybe I can learn from you.
