My Nipple Disappeared ...also I have Dysphoria, please stop saying that I don't. 

I love you, boomer. Thanks for being awesome :)

;-;

i mean the blind spot exists for a reason ahhaha - it is where the optic nerve starts. and also, the brain artificially creates the colour purple! watch echo gilette's video!

Hi honey🙏🏾😭

@@jusdorange4720 *god i love echo gillette*. that video is STELLAR!!

That's for your optic nerve though

Chloe I’M AFRAID IT WAS BAD ENOUGH SEEING THE DRESSINGS COME OFF AND I HAVENT GOT TO THAT PART YET 😨

Chloe oh ok cool we didn’t see it. Jesus imagine if it was your job to cut off people’s nipples. Nope. Not for me.

I kinda knew that was possible... But didn't know it was noticable. I want to know more.

@@HLB313 That is what I have been saying, I really don't know how these surgeon sleep at night after cutting off all those healthy breasts.

@@Skinnymarks You guys! The doctor was just messing with Ash...he could have sewn them on upside down and she wouldn't be able to tell the difference.

*dies*

Chesticles! Lol Also, duderus and brovaries!

Sam of the Stars safiya nagaard has entered the chat

I call them my naples xD

I tend to call them Chest fat, and question why so many like them,last i check im not a cow, nor am i feeding a child why must i have 25lbs of unneed unwanted fat hanging off my neck

Chesticles

I laughed for way to long 😂

Ash’s last words would be truly beautiful 😂😂

This was my favorite, lol

I don't know who these judgers are but it's downright creepy to be walking around in someone's brain without permission. Serious trespassing. And only for the sake of destruction.

@@emersonjakes8119 Exsactly, this is why we can't have nice things. All we are asking for is basic human dignity and respect for that dignity. Is it too much to ask for other people not to care if someone is different than them?

It's aliens.

@@raapyna8544 from area 51

Same I literally thought that throughout the whole video

Same i love ash eyes.

Right, like, I just can't stop looking at them ;U;

Me too!

Ikr

^this^

Oh... *you have no idea*! The amount of pseudoscience that goes on in the trans community itself is complete madness, what some cis people think is beyond any fiction I could ever write!

I think they thought the breasts continue to grow through your life when really it stops when puberty ends.

yeah I really don't want to be judgemental but my knee jerk reaction was "how stupid are people to think they would grow back?"

There's a soccer-playing amputee named Josh something who apparently gets asked when his leg will grow back. I think we need to push for better science education in this country.

Big huge agree with this! Couldn't have said it better myself

Not someone who has had my nipples altered but when my were pierced they did actually get bigger and change shape slightly. I don't fully understand it but I did look it up and apparently It's normal and not uncommon. After taking them out one of nipples is back to it's original size you can't see where the piercing was at all. The other is still a bit wider than before I had it done (though I would not call it misshapen) and if you look you can just about see where the piercing was.

@@Harri_James your nipples dont get larger but can look a little bigger due to the bar or hoop pushing the nipple out more. The reason one nipple stayed like that and not the other on you is probably because it has more scar tissue. Also probably why you have the little scars on that side rather than the one that is flat again.

@@jrutan71 it wasn't that they were less flat though- they were actually wider than they had been previously. I just guessed it was related to scar tissue formation around the bar. Both nipples can now go flat or erect as normal but one is still wider than it was previously. Obviously as a pierced you understand these things better than me - I'm just saying it wasn't the about them being flat/erect I was referring to.

Oh, I'm not trans but I have so many questions ! How in your experience do nipple piercings affect breastfeeding ? I've read mixed reports on the internet, and it seems logical that piercings could damage the main milk duct, but also that removing them would allow it to reform. Also, is recovery worse for bigger breasts (think E cup) vs flatter chests ? Either in terms of pain or healing with the extra movement and friction ? Oh and can I still wear the same bra for two weeks after getting my piercing or is that an obviously bad idea ?

@@whychoooseausername4763 we always suggest taking out the nipple piercings to heal as soon as you find out your pregnant so by the time you have the baby you can normally breastfeed. I have mine done I have a double d the healed great one of the quickest healing piercings I've ever done. I wouldnt use the same bra just because it is an open wound. You dont want a build up of bacteria. I do suggest wearing a sports bra while sleeping though that was a life saver. Oh and keep loofahs away from the area when you're taking a shower especially if you get barbells rather than hoops. The netting can get caught on them and pull I've done it myself it is not fun.

Ashton Ix There are more Ash’s? how? duplication?

And i heckin cant have it cuz i have curly

im non bianary and pan and my hair is down to my ass because my mom wont let me cut it. actually considering shaving my head😂

Doot Noot I know. On fleek

Omg what's that hair style called

boi oofboil oof just do it m8 be the glorious nonbinary person you were born to be!!😘

I don't think she shared that information for the haters but for us, his audience who have supported and loved them for years.

Nothing much, just binge watching your videos. You?

Great! How's your day?

It’s going lit because you uploaded a video

Decent

My day has been groovy. How's yours?

Love yourself buddy top or no top... I was born a man and grew into being fat so i got boobs i dont want either, just remember to love yourself first on your journey

hey transwoman here and I dont like my chest. although its more of my lack of chest. I want breast augmentation but I hear it REALLY hurts. so Im just hoping horomones work for me and I get a solid A cup. I admire you transmen and nonbinery people chest surgery sound INCREDIALBLY invasive. however ,if I was in your place I would do it as well

Don’t be scared of the horror stories of others experiences, I had my top surgery in 2012. I had no problems and I know many people who haven’t had issues not to mention it’s almost 2019 and medically top surgery has gotten so much better

There are a ton of really positive stories on RU-vid. If it's something you feel like you want/need, it's worth watching them to psych yourself up. Remember that everything has horror stories attached. No medical procedure is perfect, and every surgery carries risk, but this one is pretty safe.

book lover Can you tell this to my parents? The other day my dad told me, “No, you thought...” like, you don’t know! This is me, not you!

@@patriciacantwrite7236 ugh I'm sorry you have to deal with that. I would tell them off if I could

You don’t know me, I am so complex and I’m just idk I’m so special you know

Lydia Butler i only didn’t like this comment bc it as 69 likes

Lydia Butler uuuuu

Literally me. Agreed

we Stan an educated ally

666 likes lmao

I wish you the best in life

Fiona Wait thank you!!

Absolutely on the same page as you m8 💚

They will be just man boobs

Imagine how unrealistic one would look if you gained weight distributed over all of your body BUT your chest. It would look awful. So, yes, if you gain weight, your chest gets bulk, too. But no boobs. Not gonna happen.

I usually joke (and also it's true) that my cis boyfriend has bigger "boobs" than I as a cis woman have.

You never "wish dysphoria" on a tucute (not calling ash one, I dont know them), but you warn them that it wont be pretty, and if they dont have dysphoria then they WILL get it. We never wish dysphoria on others, we just warn them. Its aweful and it sucks seeing non-dysphoric people get depression

@@UncleLucky ah yes how dare I warn people of a horrible thing that will cause them pain that I dont want to see them get oh woe is me Im such a transphobe :(((

///Paper Bag \\\ that is my favorite book

Same! I love Riley!

Actually a Chicken Nugget Riley is actually like the best possible human ever

@@kbartlett2776 I know, my dude!

The book is amazing and I’m so happy I stumbled across it :’)

Teea Trash Same. Like I read it because me and a kid in my class swapped books, but after literally reading the entire thing overnight i got it for myself and I just keep reading it because it’s great

I agree

Yeah, they might not be feeling what the other person is feeling, but both of their experiences could be diagnosed as dysphoria.

It's like with most other things with human beings. We are all different and experience things differently. Just because someone describes their experience differently to your own doesn't mean that it's wrong or not valid for some reason.

Eh... I mean, I DO agree. But also... there are people detransitioning/retransitioning. And some of them aren't particularly happy about it. And... I don't know the solution to that particular problem. To be fair, I do think it's super reasonable for a surgeon/doctor to require at least a psychological check-in of some sort (and sometimes doctors DON'T require that - I didn't need a letter for my chest surgery, but to be fair, I'd been on testosterone for 6 years at that point). I guess I just wish there were more infrastructure and resources, really.

I think the real gatekeeping is for those that DON'T have dysphoria at all. They claim that someone isn't trans if they never had dysphoria of any degree. I agree with that statement as, there isn't a reason to transition at all if they do, and it is almost making fun of trans people's legitimateness. Those that are doing it for cosmetic reasons rather than for dysphoria reasons make it harder for trans with dysphoria to gain financial aid for hormones or surgeries. Not to mention the social legitimacy. People who are already "offed" by trans folks aren't going to switch to support if they continue to think that being trans is a choice.

same same same, Im not quite has shift-y as Riley, but I'm a little shift-y, so I can still relate!

I read that a few years back, the best LGBT novel I’ve read

Yo! It's been 9 months, how did surgery go?? Did it go well? Are you happy with your results?

I'm trans too, just asking- how can you be nonbinary and trans ftm at the same time? (Not being rude, that actually sounds like it could be me so I'd like to learn more about it :3)

cat boi hey! So... I think there is a term for it? Demiboy, I think... I say I’m a nb boy bc in the gender spectrum I see myself mostly as a boy but not completely? Idk hxjsbdbd gender is a mess.... but I do use he/him! Hope this helps.....

Kaitlyn Jennings fighting with that kind of people is useless... they’re just assholes... I’m sorry to hear you’re being bullied... but I promise you it gets better! I’m in college and things are SO much better now... school sucks but you’re going to make trough it! The best advice I can give you is to never let anyone tell you who you are/should be. Be your true self and fight for it! You deserve it

I don’t know if you’re able to get or use one, but gc2b makes skin tone binders that you can swim in. It might help you feel less dysphoric than swimming in a bra. Just a suggestion, and sorry if this doesn’t help at all.

Araya Bishir hey! Thanks for the suggestion! I do have a donation binder from them but I still live with my mom and she didn’t let me swim with it.... it sucked

UnseemlyHalo482 If you made a post on Twitter or Instagram and then tagged them, they'd most likely see it!

@@theorosef Ah alright, thanks!

Dean Fleming ikr! I LOVE your profile picture by the way.

@@ellasedits_ thank you

Love the profile pic

Blessed.

mathias havaas nuuuuuu im satanic

Wow... That's IMPOSSIBLE in Taiwan now :(

I guess you born in the right place. :)

林Yan nope... right beside the right place; sweden (i live in norway)

Ren that’s what I think ppl don’t get. Nonbinary dysphoria is very different

What is nonbinary dysphoria and how is that treated?

@@sablechicken gender dysphoria but for non binary people

@@notscarlet8321 That doesn't make any sense. First off people are either male or female so you can't actually be non binary.

@@sablechicken I guess it's a bit tricky question to answer in any other way, unless one's a doctor. I would assume it'a a brain that's between male and female or an intersex brain (a mix), combined with a non-matching (binary) body, that causes dysphoria. But we can't define a brain's sex biologically yet and we don't even know what we are looking for. Gender identity is the only trace we have of it. So we can't know for sure if a non-binary person's dysphoria is caused by their brain's and body's sexes not matcing. When it's about binary trans people, it's an easy theory to accept, because we tend to believe men and women are innately different, therefore have different brains and would notice if their head and body didn't match. (If we were to believe that gender is completely a social construct, that would make things difficult.) There was also a case of a boy whose circumcition failed, being raised as a girl, and he struggled his whole life as a "trans" (a cis person who had been lied to about their gender) person until he took his life. So gender (identity) as an innate thing is pretty much confirmed, at least it can't be forced by the society from one end to the other. Non-binary people's dysphoria is diagnosed with the same symptoms criteria as the binary trans people's. The doctors and nurses treat it the best they can by listening to the patient and evaluating together what kind of help and treatment they need and what helps them - they are treating them by making them feel more comfortable in their own skin - same as for binary trans people. But it can be more difficult to get help if you are non-binary, because there are still many doctors who won't believe them.

Hmm... My dad thinks it's okay to be FTM, but he thinks non binary is weird :'(

Phobia is a fear, people don’t fear people

@@mickey099 plenty of people fear people wym

Mickey Jönes I have never feared a murderer. Or a school lockdown...

@@mickey099 a phobia is fear *or aversion to*

YAY ITALY. lol.

Ash Hardell Pizza pasta mandolino as lifestyle. lol

Cards Against Humanity is gonna have to make a Nipple Pack.

thank I try hard to make it not-awful-to-watch

Ash Hardell and you succeed very well in doing so! C:

Dude I agree. I read this in the hospital shortly after coming out as non-binary and the healthcare world is super hard on enbies and having that sense of validation was so nice, especially having my doctors thinking my transness was my emotional problem. Even knowing that like there are adult enbies is so validating to me.

Emerson Jakes the world definitely has a bit to go but that books gives me so much hope! I’m glad you also could find validation in it. Best of luck to you just in general 😆 and I hope something makes you smile this week😊

I have to say, I concur. I felt for years that my discomfort was just me and my brain being a drama queen and that because as I was growing up my female peers were keen to begin embracing their boobs that it was expected of me too so I did it. And I BFF got used to it. I remember the day I found out about binders, tried one on and though the damn thing broke after about a month, the difference it made was stark. I was finally feeling good about the way I looked. And for the longest time I had no terminology to use to describe this discomfort. When you feel compelled to avoid looking my at yourself in your own bathroom mirror or down in the shower or when you physically ache from binding that yo have to just take it off and breath but also deal with the return of that pain. What worries me in that same irrational way is that because I only started wearing a binder in my early 20s, and only discovered that there is in fact terminology to describe what I feel, that some how it isn’t legit. That some how my deep down in my soul need for too surgery at some point so I don’t have to live in a binder doesn’t seem real because I haven’t disclosed his discomfort to my doctor until recently. I wonder if anyone else has had similar concerns. Your videos Ash Hardel, shed light on issues I have been facing and flat out ignoring for longer than I have ever let on to anyone including myself and I thank you for that. It’s so important for people to feel like their peers share their experiences. I’m so grateful to you for helping me to admit to myself that this is what my soul wants, not to have to live the rest of my life with breasts. Now and after the past three years, I have taken the first step and said something to my doctor. And that is not only a huge relief but so scary. But to think that maybe I won’t have to live like this forever… that’s everything.

Nah, that's what Ash said!

You know that’s what it says on his locker in the staff room.

PS: I'm making you fanart soon!

@Tia TT thank You! I just really love ash and everything they do

Right? I felt like that was also so invalidating for breast cancer patients whom lose their breasts, not by choice... Those don't grow back. :(

As a small chested lady, I can only wish that my breast tissue would just grow and grow and grow 🤦🏻‍♀️ but that's off the topic

Your parents are aaaamaaazing!

I wish I had parernts like you.

....I assume by normal you mean cis-hets? Cuz "normal" is not the most accurate or inclusive word choice. Ash seems pretty normal to me, if a bit goofy.

I think they meant the people not attacking and making ignorant comments as normal.

Dont be so arrogantly delusional ...

@@myrtlemcnappy1641 calm down. I hope your day gets better. No need to be so judgmental. I dunno who you're referring to, but regardless, everyone here but you seems to want to be supportive and/or informative.

@@myrtlemcnappy1641 calm down. I hope your day gets better. No need to be so judgmental. I dunno who you're referring to, but regardless, everyone here but you seems to want to be supportive and/or informative.

Oh, I mean... every so often, a nipple is lost... which sounds incredibly funny lol. There was a trans guy WAAAY back in the day who lost one of his nipple grafts (like, it didn't "take" essentially), and you can have a nipple tattooed on in that case, but he decided to just get a little red star in place of it, and it looked SO COOL!

Celeste M people are cruel. It sucks

yes! isn't that your favorite fact ever now?!?!?!/!?!?1?!

@@HeyThere005 You learn something new everyday! 😂

The body is like nope take it back to the kitchen it's not good

Can someone send me some links to back this up? I'm super interested and can't find anything on it

yeah same pls ^^^

Madeline Leyland what is that?

Creepy-Quiji dysphoria is the feeling that some part of yourself doesn’t a-line with the gender you identify as. The type of dysphoria I was talking about is body dysphoria which means I was born in the wrong body so I feel uncomfortable when I see my own body, but you can also have social and gender dysphoria. Gender dysphoria is the discomfort cause by your brain and body not matching and social dysphoria is the discomfort caused by someone using the wrong pronoun to refer to you or any other misgendering socially.

Madeline Leyland thank you! I was really confused! all that stuff sounds really complicated but I think I understand it now.

Agreed dysphoria sucks

Creepy-Quiji awesome

OH, you would be shocked! Of course those mere high schoolers exist, but there are suuuper toxic people in the trans community who are EXTREME ASSHOLES. My first (and only!) meeting at the Local Trans Group involved me getting into a fight with another binary trans man 30 years my senior and him accusing me of being gay... and I'm bi. And the facilitator didn't know how to handle that (because he doesn't know how to facilitate). And that was one of the less demeaning fights I've been in with another trans man!

@@giftedboi That's awful, I'm so sorry you had to deal with that 🙁 I didn't know some people within the trans community could be so nasty, I assumed it was all cis people. I hope you are able to find a better support group!!

SHUCKS. I actually totally filmed a TW for it, it was suppose to go right after I talk about crying on the treadmill. Im not sure what happened! Editing for this was a rush and I have been spacey. My bad, and you are totally right. Popped in a warning in the pinned comment, hopefully that helps!

@@HeyThere005 That's okay, totally understandable with everything that's been going on! Thanks for doing that ❤ ❤ ❤

@Roge john How? I literally just asked for a trigger warning, which Ash gave, and which I thanked them for! It was horrible for me to come across some of those scenes without warning and there's nothing wrong with wanting other people to be able to prepare themselves.

#triggered

I read this book a while ago and I was so unprepared for the rape scene. It was an amazing book, but I certainly haven’t recommended it to anyone without a content warning after that