MY RULES/THOUGHTS ON SCREEN TIME WITH MY KIDS||WHAT WORKS FOR US|ASHLEE ANSWERS 

You're so encouraging. We do no screens during the week. I fought so long with limits and systems. Screen time was a nightmare. Until one day I woke up and realized "I'm the mom! I'm in charge!", and just like that... Screens were gone. I'm. The. Mom.

Great video! We’ve recently cut back on screen time because of attitude issues and it’s really helped. My daughter is a different kid in a more positive way when she’s playing and being creative vs. watching TV.

Ashley!!! It is so refreshing to hear this! I agree 100% with everything you said! It's exactly what I do with my 3! Great job Mama! 💕

I've been digging into your older content and it is such a blessing. I so admire your confidence in your homeschooling! Just wanted to drop a note to let you know how much I appreciate your videos and that my family is so thankful for your content! -Maggie (4 boys ages 12,9,6 & 3)

This is something I am struggling with and need to change big time! I got in a bad habit of watching tv all the time with my eldest when I was depressed before I got saved and the habit has stuck and needs to be broken! Great video 💗

I love this! I have received grief from friends and family for using the same rules, but I am confident in how well it works for our family. I also feel that it is really important for parents to limit screen time as much as possible so that we are actually communicating and engaged with our children. ❤ Thanks so much!

It is definitely the best for children this way. I'm on the same band wagon as you with this. I don't think you're way too strict. I think it's important to set rules. Thanks for sharing.

You’re so amazing. I love your rules and structure. It’s so inspiring to me. I think it should be the norm to limit screen time like you do. We do the same in our household. Keep up the awesome job you’re an amazing mom!!!!!

Ha! I love this! I was watching this with my kids who kept looking at me and asking, “Did you get your ideas from her?!” We have basically the same rules. Gotta do what you feel is best for your family and your kids. 👍🏼

Love it!!! We struggle with electronic time...and you have given me great ideas!!!

I also really like that you do videos that people request! So unique and actually really involves the viewer!

So glad to hear you say this. My kids have little to no screen time outside of a few select children's programs. We do watch certain family shows together during the winter months. Otherwise, no screens. They do not have cell phones, iPads, Kindles or anything like that. We don't have cable or satellite either. We don't miss it at all! You are being wise my friend, not strict. Good for you! There's at least two of us out there!

Thanks for sharing! Totally agree! Thanks for the encouragement! ❤️

I agree with you soo much! Best video. I think it's so important for people to talk about this. My view is almost identical to yours. We do audiobooks on road trips. So fun! ❤ ❤

Wooohooo for balanced screen time! Our screen time schedule seems similar to yours. Be blessed.

I know this is an older video but i found it at a great time! Thanks so much!

Excellent. Thanks for sharing. Very encouraging and motivating.

Thank you so much for sharing. We have VERY similar rules as well and my husband and I agree there will never be a gaming system in our house.

LOVE THIS thank you! I have felt like a mean mom and I am so glad that I am not alone in the screen restrictions!

Love all of this!

I’m the same! I save screen time for when one of my three has something... gymnastics, ballet, Robotics, etc. or for school work. It was hard for ME to not have the TV on in the background of the day. I am glad I made the adjustment. I feel less stressed.

Would love to hear about updates on how or if screen time has changed this year and what you guys do to stay active during the shutdowns.

Great video!!! I love your presentation on the topic! Kudos to you and your family. We are very similar. We save screen time for the weekends, and 90% of it is Japanese since my kids are bilingual and 4 and under. The 10% is a Theo which we watch for free on Right Now media.

My daughter is four and have been screen free until now, im kinds nervous to introduce it but this is so helpful to help navigate certain situations when she gets older!

You are right on that screens hinder developing minds. There is a great deal of research to support this, but it is not reported on. You have to look for the studies. In my opinion you are not to strict. We follow pretty much the same rules except that Sundays they may only watch shows that teach a bible lesson (i.e. Adventures in Odyssey, Bible Heros, etc..) It is a way our family keeps Sundays Holy:) Kudos to you Mama...Stay the course.

I would love to see how you have had success growing your youtube channel. Thanks for this video!

Whew! I think this is great! I wonder if I can implement this.

THIS!! 100% with you!! I have very strict screen time rules for my kids too, and think it is VERY important, especially these days! And they will not have social media even when they are teenagers - just NO!

I love the info. We have been cutting way back on screen time this fall and I really needed the encouragement.

That is very Helpful! Thank you.

You have no idea how happy I am to see this video! Awesome, I agree to a t. If you are strict ppl will think I’m crazy. And I’m sure family and friends think we are. Our children are 5 and about to be 4 and they have no clue what tablets are or video games or anything. We read a lot of books and play games. They LOVE puzzles and matching cards, trains and we go outside when weather permits. I just saw the awesome testimony of a marriage that was restored by the Lord but he struggled with porn bc when he was 8 he found porn and the addiction started at a very young age. That’s what you can find on social media and the internet at your hands and parents are oblivious sometimes. I say it because I saw it in family and it’s devastating. I get sad and frankly in shock when I go out and see parents not paying attention to their kids bc they are in their smartphones or shutting kids down with technology. People have questioned our decision to homeschool bc “they need social interactions” but I see kids that go to traditional school and don’t know how to interact with ppl bc of the stupid tablets. My kids are young but talk to anyone bc that’s all we do at home. They might watch a movie once a month or once every 2 months. No cartoons for them and they are super happy and funny kids. They don’t need it. We’ve been on a couple of road trips and I just bring lots of toys for them. But honestly they are ok with books and puzzles. My 5 yr old does 100 pieces on his own so that keeps him busy. They also love animals! Again, agree with you completely! And I respect you more and more as a mom! Thanks for encouraging us all!

Wow- that’s awesome. Wish I’d done it that way. Stay strong mama! If you have an update I’d love to hear it.

We’re even more strict lol we don’t even own a TV, or tablets or anything, the only screens in our house are mine and my hubby’s phone! It is hard at times! Sometimes I call him and say “I really wish we had a tv today!” Haha but for the most part it is such a blessing! I have seen firsthand what too much screen time does to a kid 😢 anyway, love your video! Love how you touched on the internet safety because I feel like a lot of parents are oblivious and really need to hear that!

Thanks for sharing. We need an updated video on this please👍🏼

Love this! Sounds like our rules!

I think it great you have found and stick to what works best for your family, even if it outside the norm of the majority. I mean, we are homeschool moms after all. ;-) I have went back and forth on screen time limits for our kids. With our first child the hubs and I both worked no not much time for screens, not to mention the internet was just a blip at the time. And 7 years later when I had 2 in diapers and became a stay at home mom while the hubs worked a 12 hour day and night swing shift. I gotta admit there were times in the day when the screen was the only thing to keep the house quite while Dad was sleeping and I needed to cook dinner. As the boys have gotten old that's not a big problem anymore, but the hubs is a gamer and aI movie watcher. So we don't have hard and fast rules, but we do set limits and boundaries for screens. Some seasons I'm like you and others times there are almost no limits, usually we fall somewhere in the middle. I find this to be a more than necessary controversial issue. Its should be solely up to each family what's acceptable and what's not without judgement. But what can I say we live in falling, broken world. Love your videos! Ps I finally did it...after using TG&TB level K on my computer with the boys as a review to see if we would like the layout; and saw we are coming to the end of the free sample and so loving it. It incorporates so much of everything we have been using, but in one place!....I bought level K and the typing 1 and 2 using your link! I can't wait to see just how pretty it is! Thanks so much for you great honest reviews! I adore you and your content! Good bless.

Love your nail color!

I’ve found the longer we go with screen time limits the easier it has gotten. They just know so they don’t ask anymore. What has worked for us is the treat/dessert approach. We tell our kiddos screen time is a nice treat like chocolate cake but we don’t eat chocolate cake everyday for every meal. I was letting my middle son play video games nearly every day last year and wow was his behavior affected. He lost it as a privilege and has played one time since and his behavior is SOOO different.

Yes! I am the same way. And the kids love our outdated wii. Lol It does make my heart so sad when I go out and see kids zombiefied in front of a screen when they could be learning self control, proper behavior and basic human interaction.

Love all of this! We do a lot of these same things!

Super helpful. Thanks alot for sharing.

I do almost exactly the same as you when it comes to screen time!

I'd love an updated video on how you're handling screen time!

We have very similar screentime guidelines. It is encouraging to know we are not the only "strict" parents.

I LOVE your rules/restrictions! We have similar at our home but my oldest is definitely a tester and tries to push things. Something I would love to know is besides playing outside (which is the best in my mind) what do your kids enjoy? Just looking for more ideas to possibly add to our home that will encourage creativity and use of their minds! Thanks!!!

I’m just watching this and I love it. My kids are 2 and 5. I can definitely tell the days they have more technology time. We use tablet or screen time while I make dinner. They come and go. During breakfast, they watch something on PBS Kids and then I try to turn it off. My oldest has gotten to the point most days he will say “We are done with breakfast, do you want me to turn the TV off?” Since I’m a stay at home mom, it’s easier to monitor. When my husband is home on the weekends, it gets more lacks because they watch TV and snuggle Daddy.

Almost the same in our household. I limit 30 min screen time daily. They can choose to split it in 15/15 or 10/10/10 if its the iPad what they are using or just 30 min for a Netflix episode of their choice. And of course movie nights.

Love! "No screens to manage behavior."

Id love to see a video for family movies you’d recommend, some suggestions for appropriate shows/movies. Getting harder to find out there! Thanks.

Good job Mom Keep it up!!!

I think its great. On our school days we dont even do tablets or kindle only computer and for classes.

I am so encouraged by this. If I could give you a million AMENS I would. I am glad to see that there are other "dinosaurs" out there. That's what people like to call us around here. They are astonished that my child doesn't know how to work my phone.

We are similar. We don’t do screens during travel and vacations. Monday-Thursday they are aloud 1 hour after all school work and chores are done. Friday they are aloud a few hours in the evening while my husband and I go out for the night. They are aloud Netflix or our old wii on Saturday mornings until we get up for the day. Saturday nights we either do family movie night or computer game night. No screen time on Sunday. The summer we cut it even more. Friday- Saturday are they same, unless we are on vacation which happens a lot in the summer.

Questions: does your daughter turn in the flip phone back to you? What are your thoughts with email, texting, etc in the near future? How will you monitor these things? Do you have a filter? How do you and your husband stay on the same page with screens/tech? Thanks!!

So I think this is great! I'm wanting to cut down on screen time too. I think it is affecting their attitudes. However, when they get up in am they have an hour or so before breakfast, school, etc. What do your kids do as soon as they get up, as they're waiting for you to get things going? Wouldn't mind others' suggestions too, thanks 🙂

So good 👏👏👏

First off I love that you match your background in this video ;)

It's the same rules in my house as well (maybe even a little more strict 😬). Young minds do not need to be flooded with things that are not meaningful or uplifting. We were allowing a few shows on Netflix in the morning during summer but the second it was turned off they were grouchy and complaining that they were bored. After 4 weeks of zero TV, they are like different kids! They each grab a book or get out the music bin and start making music on their kazoos and tambourines! It's been amazing! AND what's even better is that they no longer beg or even ask to watch TV! My son does get to play with our iPad from time to time because he has a robot that you need to control it with, but that's it! Such a blessing! Thank you for sharing this video!

I appreciate your candidness with this topic. I agree with how you monitor computers and screen time use. It's nice to know my child will share the(ir) world with others that have not grown up with a constant screen in front of their face.

I love this discussion. My son would be on an electronic most of the day if he could😕.

So here's my question! What do you do when all hell is breaking loose?? lol I have a 2 and 3 year old, both girls. And they FIGHT like cats and dogs. We work so hard to teach them to be kind, but some days they literally fight and scream all day. I try REALLY hard to not use TV to catch of few minutes of quiet, but sometimes that's the resort. Could you do a video about you manage all the emotions in your house and what tools you use when siblings are fighting?

I grew up in the 80's when Nintendo first came (showing my age) and I remember winning one from my Catholic school for selling a certain amount of items from a fund raiser. We had it one week and my mom took it away because we were getting so glued to it- never got it back and I actually donated it to a Children's Hospital instead. Fast forward to present time I married a person that had unlimited access to games and we strongly disagreed on giving them to our children. My son is now 11 and home e-learning and we fight everyday about screens (my husband now agrees with my no video game rule now 8 years later). I have come up with a list to complete thanks to another mom sharing and he earns 2 hours of game time M,W,F. Where it gets sticky is weekends. His friends literally play 24/7 so I get a ton of pushback that I am the worst mom and I'm ruining his life. And now with social distancing he is here with me and his two sisters (8 and 5). Any suggestions on getting him more engaged with family? We will be home schooling next year for the first time so we will be spending a ton of time together. Love your content as always.

I totally agree with you on development. I always think “they will never regret not having more screen time”. We as adults struggle with self-control and managing screen time. I think many kids these days get too much info too soon. Thanks for sharing!!

Love it! Do you keep the same guidelines during school breaks?

I agree, to an extent....Not all screen time is bad. Without access to his own computer, my son would have never figured out how good he is at coding at a young age and the fact that he wants to be a software engineer. He’s 12. Limits are good, but too many limits and you could be limiting unforeseen potential.

Hi Ashlee! I just came across this older video but I wanted to ask what would you do for screen time rules for a 4 year old? I don’t homeschool my 4 year old all day but I definitely want to get more strict on her screen time. She has an iPad with educational apps but I really want to keep her off of it as much as I can. Hope that makes sense. Thanks!!

also, how much tv do you watch yourself with your husband or alone? That's where I struggle..I watch too much tv and so I put something on for them at the same time..etc

Thanks for the video! Just wondering if you could do a video on current shows/movies your family enjoys watching on Netflix. I have 2 small girls (1 and 4). My husband and I struggle to watch shows for ourselves that are funny but don't have cussing. Just wondering if you had any recommendations? Also do you use anything besides Netflix to watch TV?

Thank you for sharing your routine. I am way too lax with TV with my little one and have been wanting to implement some guidelines on when to use. This gave me some great ideas.

While your limitations do seem strict they are obviously working great for you and your family and have encouraged me to believe my daughter can find much better things to do than play Minecraft for 1/4 of the day! Thank you so much for sharing.

I fully believe in your house your kids your rules. I wish I would have implemented this from my daughters younger age she is 11 now and my 5 year old as well. The rest are 3 and younger they are easier and don't really care. But taking away screens is like pulling teeth for us if I'm being honest. But I am slowly decreasing them.

It’s good to have restrictions on tech time. There are countless studies that show the dangers of addiction to these devices and how it affects the dopamine receptors in the brain. We allow our kids to watch some TV that is approved by us. They don’t and will not have smart phones. It’s been a good things for our family. Our oldest kids are off at college now and they are very well rounded people who aren’t obsessed with social media or being on their phones.

I’m curious, what’s your personal screen time use look like? Because my kids are more independent now, I find myself attached to my phone. Not happy about that, but there’s only so much cleaning/organizing I can do. We live in an area where it gets frigid in the winters so again, limited to outside activity. Would love suggestions or an insight of what works for you!

I love your guidelines and think they're totally appropriate! I have a question I'd love to get your opinion on. I'm recently divorced (last summer) and before the divorce, we had rules around screen time that I've continued and maintained since... however, when my son goes with his dad, he gives him as much as he possibly wants... so when he comes back...it's a whole new struggle EVERY single time. Any thoughts/suggestions?

It is great to have these guidelines in place. Screen usage becomes a more difficult issue as kids get older. I have several teens and it is difficult because all of their friends communicate through text messages and Instagram. I am also interested in knowing if you think your policy on screens would be any different if you did not have the opportunity to go to a gym and had to workout at home. Would you allow screen time?

How do you motivate them to get school done with no electronics during the school week? My son, is 10, and he complains about all the other things I suggest like reading, drawing.

We have similar rules as well. My kids have no screens of any kind and we might watch a movie as a family on the weekend. Otherwise no screens during the week. We also don’t have cable or Netflix, we only have PureFlix 🙂

What he's do you have on your kindle? I have trouble finding good things.

I'm 15 and I obey my mom to the max, she is the one that is in total control. Everyday, I come home from school and the 1 st thing I do, is give her my phone...don't want any distractions, then I do my homework, then all the chores for that day, which must be done to my moms satisfaction. Then I do whatever she tells me to do with no back talk or arguing. I never get my phone back till the morning. On the weekends, I do want she wants me to do, Before I have my " Free Time"!! Sometimes I will get my cell phone, Sometimes I wont...just depends on what my mom wants and says. BUT.....I'm NEVER allowed to be on my phone in my moms presence. I love it that way!

I know this was 3 years ago now 😅 but what shows do your kids enjoy or that you’d recommend? We’re just starting the “Who was” series and I was wondering what other shows you guys like

This is basically the exact same thing we are doing! We don’t have an extra phone for our sixth grader but have been considering it for drop-offs. What pay as you go plan do you use for your flip phone?

Completely random and unrelated question....what is the name of that dusty sage shade of paint on your walls?

I'm a homeschool teacher, my student is 12 and his parents don't limit his screen time at all and never have. He's completely addicted and spends 6-12 hours a day on his iPad and video games. He views everything off screen as a chore even playing with friends (which he didn't even have before me) even doing fun outings I get push back because he doesn't want to limit his screen time. How do I communicate to the parents how important it is to lower screen time? Are there good books/studies on this? Because when I Google it there's just a bunch about how it can be beneficial but those studies aren't talking about 6-12 hours a day...

We are pretty similar. How do you handle being around other kids that use phones and or family members like aunts/uncles/cousins that have and use their phones with their kids? Have your kids asked about that?

Great video Ashlee! I would like to know how you set boundaries on YOUR screen time. I have a lot of trouble sometimes setting boundaries on my own screen time as a homeschool mom. I can easily end up down a rabbit hole on RU-vid or social media, when I’m usually just looking for something specific. And 30 minutes later, I’m like, “what the heck happened to the last 30 minutes!?” Do you ever struggle with this? Thanks! ❤️

Hi

Lol Livy loves Spirit too ;-)

In place of electronics and video games, what sort of privileges do you take away? How do you reward? I need help.

For my kids I have a list that they have to complete before screen time, they are allowed 3 hours per day but it’s supervised and they do different things, they have an hour in the evening to watch a Netflix episode or two, half an hour for a phone or iPad and the rest is their choice these are my rules Screen time checklist for days off: Made your bed Brushed teeth Brushed hair Gotten dressed Had breakfast At least 20 minutes of reading At least 20 minutes of writing or colouring Cleaned up there bedroom At least 20 minutes of outside play Played with something creative or imaginative for at least an hour Half an hour playing with their little brother After school screen time checklist (their only allowed 2 hours a day on school days): Hung up their backpacks Put their shoes away Cleaned out their lunchbox Washed their hands Had a snack Homework completed At least 20 minutes of reading or studying At least 1 chore Packed backpack for next day (if there’s school) Played with little brother for 20 minutes You can copy this list if you would like :)

I wish I was more strict when it came to screen time.....

Thanks so much for this topic! I always seem to be the odd mom out when it comes to screen time but I'm glad to see I'm not alone! My husband and I ditched cable years ago and now I absolutely can't stand cable when I happen to come across it. We recently took a trip to Legoland CA and I was astonished to see screens everywhere, including one in the nook where the kiddos slept in our hotel room (this is in addition to the TV in the main part of the room where the parents sleep). In the Castle Hotel Restaurant, another TV. When you step out of the elevator on main floor, another TV right in front of you. I mean we are at Legoland! We aren't here to watch TV! I'm very passionate about this topic as you can see ;-) Screens are soooo addictive for children (and adults too). All this to say, yeah, we are super strict with screen time. My guys are only 6 and 3. We do one "screen time" day every 3 weeks where they can watch a kids movie from our Amazon Prime selection or a couple of shows. However, I do know they watch some screen time at Grandma's when they stay there twice a week for a few hours while I work. It's the reason we limit to once every 3 weeks...As they get older we will likely lax a bit because I like the idea of them having their own Kindle and I'd like to use documentaries in our homeschool.

Oh yeah and power to you. This has to be hard sometimes for u to not just say go watch TV lol.

I love this I wish we would have been stricter on screen time when mine were younger.

Love this!!! What do you do in moments like this? When you aren't with them and need to work? I am a wellness coach and work on my business during the babies nap time, and sadly I let my older 3 play on phones. (We saved our old phones) If I dont, they bother my work time, and play loudly waking the baby. 😭 But I'd love to do NO SCREEN time during nap time.

random but what kind of eyeshadow is that?

What is available on the Amazon Kindle for kids?

We still use our Wii, too! My kids are 15 and 18 and they STILL don’t have cell phones. I’m definitely not more strict than you. My hubby is a long-time PC gamer, and he started the kids on safe games when they were 7 or 8. The biggest benefit to that has been their hand-eye coordination. They’ve each had their computers in a public room, until my daughter earned the right to have hers in her room with the door open. She’s 15 and a digital artist now. My 18yo son actually prefers his computer in the public room, because he’s wired directly to our office for the highest speed. He’s quite advanced in his game playing and now is the one teaching his dad how to do things! 😂 Most of the time, I don’t have a clue what they’re talking about. That said, there are benefits to some early gaming (the early ones were educational history games and such), but I wouldn’t have done that without my husband’s control over their choices. He’s a programmer/analyst, and I think he always hoped one of them would follow his passion. Instead, my daughter is artistic like me, and my son is who knows what. 😂 He’ll decide when he’s ready. Meantime, I’m just making sure he’ll be ready for college or whatever he chooses to do. Sorry! I got off topic. I love your videos! They always get me to thinking. ❤️

How old are you're kids?

Video games?

Have your screen time rules changed much since you recorded this?