Narcissistic Relationships: When to Leave, Breakup Recovery, Karma! 

It’s insane that narcs go to relationship after relationship...but after being with one, it’s like you’re traumatized and don’t date for a long time due to flashbacks, triggers, trauma, and needing to HEAL from that specific relationship. Never again! I’m much more stronger now. My life is about me now 😭🥰❤️ don’t ever look back! These people are evil!

A year ago, walked away from someone I loved dearly, because of his narcissistic traits , i was always last and I was frequently gaslighted and made to feel inadequate .... NEVER AGAIN

Binge watching videos like this are the ONLY thing keeping me from stupidly reaching out to my ex narc who I just left yesterday. I want so badly to text him and lash out for what he did, but I know it’s pointless and he doesn’t care and will only gaslight me. People like you are the real MVPs 🙏🏽💖

I have a saying towards Narcissist "I wish you well but well away from me!"

"When you're struggling to realize who someone is, it's because you don't want to believe what they're showing you"

The problem is most people rush into a relationship way too fast. The way I think of it is that most people you meet are not your match. You try things out for a while. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work. There's no deadlines. If he/she gives an ultimatum show them the door. Don't get so emotionally involved so quickly.

Projecting on them, to be who you want them to be. Such a great point!

Why do people look forward to a New Relationship, after my current relationship ends I want some Alone time, .. I need me

Absolutely true!! I ended up in two horrible relationships with narcs because of my mental stories. With the first it was that I wouldn’t find anyone else, the second was putting him on a pedistal...in my mind he was the perfect person...after I fell so in love with him and shit got real, I discovered his true colours...he was wearing the thickest shiniest mask...I was too blind to see it before I sank. Please ladies - I beg...whoever reads this...if you have a little tingle/sensation in your body, or a intuitive hit in your gut, that it doesn’t feel good being with the person, honour it. The stories of doubt or fear start kicking in, ignore it. Your intuition always supersedes the stories. Love yourself enough to listen to your inner voice and honour it. I wouldn’t want anyone to experience the emotional turmoil I’ve gone through these past few years ♥️

No contact is the way to go. Feel terrible every time she gets a hold of me,she is evil

Stephanie, you are amazing at what you do. These videos are helping me so much. Thank you for putting these videos online for free so people who struggle and learn to thrive.

I am a single mom of a high functioning autistic teen, and I just want to thank you for your videos! I follow you on almost all social media platforms, except twitter. You have helped me, and continue to help me in stabilizing my emotions with being with a narc who emotionally abused me, via manipulation, guilt, etc. I continuously went back after the "hoovering" & love bombing; but recently have gone zero contact, and it has been 32 days (when today is over it will be 33 days). It has been a struggle to enforce this, but I feel much better everyday, practicing self care and parenting myself while feeling every feeling so I can heal. I just resonate with your videos, and listen to these also with my teen daughter so that something she hears may help her learn about healthy relationship patterns, self love, etc..

I can’t tell you how helpful this video is to me!! Thank you 😊 I’m basing my breakup with my emotionally abusive boyfriend. He can’t be available for me emotionally and I’m walking on eggshells. I can’t tell you how degrading he is to me!! He has no respect for me at all!! Just thank you!!

I totally agree with you 120% !!! That’s why whenever I come across a channel that talks about “revenge” and “Karma” on a ex narcissist, I immediately skip it only because it shows that the person hasn’t grown enough emotionally and in a place of true forgivenesses because technically speaking it isn’t the ex narcissistic fault that they did the behaviors they put on to you. In fact, it goes way back to what the parents and their parents and the history of of family members taught and projected onto their Children. So again, I don’t blame the ex narcissist, instead I forgive them and myself and my family traumas and find a healthy place to move on so i can become “FREE”! And that’s the best place to be !! Thank you so much for your videos and support! I can’t thank you enough!!💜💜💜😏

If you ever feel you’ve screwed up God’s plan for your life, remember, you’re not THAT powerful!!!

Thank you for your videos. It really helps me through my journey since I "no contacted" my ex narc.

For once in my life my child and I have just left from being in an narcissist relationship. I'm gonna be working on myself and what I want in my life for better.

I am feeling so releaved by having all of this knowledge about narcissistic people, it makes me feel so much smarter as a 21 years old, i am growing more as a person, i really needed this after everything bad what happend. Thank you really much for sharing all of this on your channel, knowledge is so underrated 🙏🏼

Exactly! I dont surround myself with people like that because there negative people and any attention you give them feeds them more energy. I have known men and women like this that hide behind their money and assests and live by themselves its a comfort thing for them but if they didnt have it they would have a melt down. Its hard for me to relate to a narcassist because their goal is to live life by the dollar, sometimes they want something for nothing and when people spoil them or hand it to them they become bitter because of it. Steer clear of these people because no matter what you do its always somebody elses fault, its never their own.

Omg, that was so deep! I love how you said that if you're confused about how to see a person it's because of cognitive dissonance and you not wanting to believe what they are presenting. Mic drop, that is so profound!

Going no contact is critical in breaking the trauma bond with the narc! Never look at their social media! Never text or call them! I was having panic attacks at the end. I said to myself “no more!”. I have been no contact for 3 years! These people aren’t worth the time of day!

I really needed to see this video. It really grounded and reassured me. Thank you so much!! I'll agree that this stuff should be taught to younger people. I'm 37 and still learning!!

You make me feel so normal. We are so alike and when you said u were a single mom i gasped. We are the same and i feel so much better. Its like seeing myself from outside my body

thanks Stephanie for another great video. I used to wish bad on the ex narc but now I see how completely miserable and empty he is. He continues to get in his own way. experiencing him..allows me to love and respect myself even more for the person I am. He has taught me to appreciate so much about myself. karma takes care of what needs to be taken care of. no more hate from me..

Thank you for these videos They have helped me and I think others as well. I especially liked that you said if you have to ask when a person should leave then it’s probably time. Great job and I do hope others remember that the stories we mentally tell ourselves lay the groundwork for the future we want. Blessings of light and love 🙏🏽

The way you say "strength" gives me life 💛

my assumption when i started watching your videos was that you were with an abusive narcissist bc you talked about narcissism a lot... after watching almost all your videos i was right you were! you're the kind of person we all need as a friend

Stephanie, can you do a video on "How to explain to a 5yr. old the concept of narcissist ppl." how to identify them, how to deal with them at school, and how to stand up for yourself when needed. how to explain without demonizing a particular person.

I love your videos they have helped me so much. I ended a relationship after a year and a half with a narc just recently. I had know idea what a narcissist was or that he was one until I started researching narcissistic behavior. I went through the guilt of braking it off with him but he was slowly destroying me. I had to put myself first. Now he is blowing up my phone with trying to lovebomb me again. It will NEVER work because I feel so much better being away from that toxicity even tho I do still love him. I feel for anyone who is in a relationship with these people or were. They are the equivalent of the devil.

Was literally waiting on this. Currently on my commute and was scrolling to see you finally uploaded and you did!!!

I definitely don't want karma, I just want to be able to get out of this relationship, because my partner is hurting me emotionally, I love her but she keeps me at a distance, unless she wants to see me or be with me. I don't want to hurt her, or blame her for anything, I know I am as much to blame being codependent. ❤

i’m going to watch this video everyday, because your words. i literally got full body chills.

Maan you are such a force for good!! What an awesome vision of helping enlighten younger people BEFORE they get into their own messes! Totally resonates with me! Wow I love even more how you boldly assert how essential it is - like gee could we spare an half hour for life transformative material if we can drill students in math until they're sick? Absolutely!

You're like an angel! watching your channel makes me feel better, it's even better than therapy!

I'm 51 and your so right about narcissists.thanks for the advice.

Everything you say is what I say to myself on the daily so I’m so hopefully that I’m finally getting healthy. Just need the last step which is the strength to act on the things I say out loud. Thanks again for making me feel okay

3's in numerology are creative energy....chaotic initially, but striving in new directions. Pioneering, innovative. Needing shaped. 🙂 By the way these videos are sooo helpful. Thank you.

Thank you for your wise conseils. I am 70 now, and I do profit from your lovely ways of cutting through difficult topics. Yes, do visit Europe, it is wonderful. With love. Eva.

I feel guilt too. I feel guilty because I feel that I was selfish sometimes. He said that I didn't prioritize the relationship in some episodes. And I really didn't, but because I felt he was crossing some boundaries. Although I still feel that I act like a cold person. It's confusing.

I'm having a hard time dealing with my divorce.

I am also a Capricorn and that's why I feel so comfortable listening to you. I am a people pleaser and have always attracted emotionally abusive relationships. I also feel responsible for the abuser even after I leave. I am really looking forward to healing and attracting a healthy relationship in the future. Going to work on myself to move on after ending a two year relationship a week ago. I know I made the right decision after listening to you.

I love her videos ..she so real and authentic....great coaching...speaks from the heart...nice looking too :-)

I agree the kids need coaching early! You do such a great job!! God bless you!!

you always say the right words and they are also full of light. Thank you, I understand everything better and find relief.

You're videos are a huge blessing!, I am married to a woman who has the narc tendencies and I am really struggling with decision to leave, I just really want to stay for my son, marriage is beyond therapy sessions, and I am just flat out numb at this point. Thank for your videos, they really do shed light on the darkness.

by the time i clocked that she was a narcissist, she was pregnant... we're not together anymore, so now im having to try to co-parent with her, with all the constant berating and accusations whenever i try to lay down even the most reasonable boundaries. im not giving in, our daughter needs a stable father, but its tough, a true test of character, and man ive grown a lot in the last 12 months because of this.

One of the best videos! Made me cry. Gave me hope. Helped me realize my value.

I sure wish I would have known this year's ago... I really think this should be taught in school. Because it's a mental illness and people need to know what this is!!!! So they don't become victims...thank you for sharing your time and wisdom with everyone...blessings to you and your lil girl...

What a fantastic idea to bring this education into children's schooling.. I couldn't agree more. Thank you for one of your most helpful videos for me personally.. 💗

Being intimate versus friends with a narc is very different! closed doors enable a narc especialy a covert, as for the assumptions about who you are, I love your channel, your persona, style, and (everyone needs validations) definitely the hottest coach in the game! lol But seriously, your style is ''real'' first person compassion and understanding, your empathy shines, no agenda just real love and light, thank you.

Thank you so much for all your wonderful videos ,they have really brought clarity into my life ..and too my situation .Bless you and all the good work you do ..so grateful that i have discovered you🙏🏻❤️

You're honestly like a big sister to us 🥰

Had to laugh at 11:13 because nearly every relationship I've been in, my partner is asking those questions pretty early on. It's always "the grass is greener" and "I can do better," for them. Interestingly, that's their pattern. They do this with partners before me and after me. Some are still doing it, 30 years down the road. Never satisfied, never getting "what they need." Find this out about your partner, or prospective partner, as soon as you can and do NOT engage! IMHO.

One aha moment was when I realized that their mess, their disorganized way of keeping their stuff has an underlying reason that they are stuck and their inability to find answers to their internal chaos which shows itself in their external messy style and not willing to clear the mess.🙏

I’m a male I love all your videos. They have helped so much. Normally you don’t find a woman controlling a mans life every aspect of my life. We work together live together do everything together. It’s a narcissistic situation. Thank you for everything in all these videos.

Thank you for you support…I’m was beating myself up & you really help!

This video made me all teary eyed!! You are an inspiration!! So glad I found you!!! You know exactly what to say about everything!! God bless you greatly!!! I always feel better after hearing your counsels. It was also a great idea to announce the topic a little before hand, it had us on the edge of our seats. You're awesome!!!!

That is why I do watch you because I really do feel you are authentic and you truly want to help others. I suspected you were an empath and you have gone into and devoted a part of your life into meaningful work, the kind of work that makes a difference to others. I find that especially empaths they do give to charities or get involved into saving the dolphins or spreading the awareness of mental health or saving the world in some way because empaths to me are special people put on this earth to show us all how give back to the world. What I do like is you don't put on a fancy dress with a faceful of makeup and present your own teachings over RU-vid to promote yourself like some do, you're in a shirt, or a turtleneck, I like some of your sports wear, and somethings you wear I'd love to ask where you got them from, but it's the sort of thing you'd expect from someone who is relatable, respectable and that your knowledge really does come from within and the best part is your more attractive that others who feel the need to do this in fancy clobber. Just saying, I just have to get that out there. I watch you all the time and I find your light comes from the inner work that you have done to yourself because you have that inner glow, I'd love to sit down and have a conversation with you about the knowledge you have and actually be able to have deep meaningful conversations about life and I bet someone who is your friend, other than the kindness you do show on here but they will have all these added benefits of kindness, compassion and will really deserve the love that you give out and that's to me real beauty

Your videos are so inspiring and I felt so empowered by only listening and watching what you said and how you said it! Thanks from the bottom of my heart for the shared treasure, each and every video is a gem. I mean it.

@ Stephanie Lyn... Preach it girlfriend. Kicking Knowledge & then some. I really appreciate your ability to articulate and breakdown all these scenarios. You truly are meant for what you do. Thank you for your efforts. Even me, on the otherside... the so called bad guy trying to identify traits n characteristics within myself. I still can appreciate you for your truth. Respect! Be Well👍

Thanks for your authenticity. It really shows.

That's my passion as well to get into the school system...and teach children. Thank you for sharing..

They are good to strangers, but will not be good to you especially if you look for their approval or depend on them for money etc, even narc employer does this. They help strangers and super good to stranger than helping and being loyal to their own emoyees... But expect you to be loyal to them because you as employee dependent on them for job and finance... Whatever rules they have for you, just try to apply same rules to them and see how they react.. they will immediately get angry

Stephanie please do a video on how the narcissist used push pull to manipulate and withholding sex and intimacy

Thank you dear 😊 I was really in terrible stress, but this video helped a lot to get out of it by giving some clarity

Thank you so much for being you and helping 🙏🏼.

Just got out of 1, Truly Evil 😈 Thank God He made A way for me to leave ✝️

My best friend 45yr relationship has had a lot of trauma I finally realized that 80% is about her Manipulates Lies Disrespectful Stingy Monologue instead of dialogue Taker I FEEL that I don’t like her anymore- I love her for what she meant and the parts I liked. I realize you have to like them as well as LOVE them. If you feel anxiety If they bring out the worse in you It’s time to finally let go. I’m 62 and finally figured it out. I want relationships that I respect Givers Make me feel joyful 😀 Respectful Let go let god

Stephanie,you have immensely helped me through these videos. U don't know how intensely my spouse have gone to the high levels of playing such games, till I saw your videos n took lines / words from your videos to precisely describe his behaviour, which nailed him to the right place. Please continue your videos. I respect your work hugely. Love from India

I love these advices. I do believe that even though this past person was a narcissist and selfish the relationship we had was real. The love they had was real even if it was for that moment.

Know that you are ENTITLED to (and must) love YOURSELF more than you love the narc.

You really helped me see a lot of things about myself and my relationship. Thank you so much. I know I have to let him go but have not accepted it yet. I will continue to work on me and continue to listen to your videos. God Bless You!

All the things your saying is everything on my mind. I thought I was just not in my sanity

Thank you very much! I accidentally noticed one video from you about narcissistic people when I just even didn't look for something like this, but after the first video I watched I realized I was through all that you have described. Seems that just around that time you uploaded this video, I was left by a narcissist. I wish I was aware of such disorder and similarities in my life a lot-lot sooner than I now do. I still doubt about myself a lot. It is really difficult to believe myself. Narcissistic people and especially close partners can really do harm for your personality. And yes, I thought that it would make me much better if I knew that the person who has hurt me does suffer somehow as well, I now understand that that's not the case. I got some information, not looking for it particularly, that she does suffer in some ways kind of badly, then I didn't really felt relief. I'm truly sorry about her and especially for her children. I have no idea how to really get out of the thoughts that affect me every day, but at least in some days, I still hope that it will happen. Some days are pretty bad and tough. Your videos make me feel a little better. Although, now I've started to doubt that maybe instead of my partner (my love) I'm the one who was and is narcissistic, although one psychologist told me she didn't see signs of it from me. But still I do not know... Anyways, thank you so much for creating those videos, they somehow help me to heal, I think... all the best to you and hope you can come to Europe one day. :) All the best to you!

I am codependent and a people pleaser.... but I know I have given this person a lot of patience. I know the more I wait the more time I waste of mine.

This video gave me a lot of clarity. A LOT. Thank you for this.

I am so glad I found your channel. Thank you for explaining narcissism language in a way I can understand & figure out!!! You are sooooo much better than the other so-called narc coaches on U-Tube! I wish to have a coaching session w/ you when I can afford it...

Steph, you seriously are the BEST. You have helped me so so much.

4 years spent with a narcissist is over thank God!!!

Thank You Once Again!! You Are A GodSend, Stephanie!! I value my vowels in my marriage and have struggled for 25 years. I finally broke 2 years ago with a breakdown with the passing of my brother. I believe in my heart 💔 being married to a Narcissist hasn’t helped. I’ve learned to ignore her negativity and controlling issues...when I do this; it angers her! What To Do?? She expects quick replies to all conversations. Some, just don’t seem to be questions... She expects undivided attention,,, expecting me to stop everything and look her in the eye and respond... What To Do??? I’m Running Dry Again But Keep my Faith in Jesus.

It could be like me I had not even heard of the word until 3 years ago because sick of the crazy toxic circle & googled toxic relationship & seems like the world new everything that goes on in our house

I divorced my wife after almost four decades after discovering the term traumabonding and all the many things empaths go through the hardest thing I've ever done, but I really don't want her to suffer for what she put me through. Wanting your Narc to suffer will keep you from healing.

I love you so much !!!❤️❤️❤️❤️ thank you for all your wise words, I watch your videos everyday to help me get through a breakup with a narcissist✨💗 I appreciate you 🌷💗🌟💕

My ex-boyfriend (narc) also happens to be my co-worker (also other narcs on my job). I’ve been on my job for 8 yrs now, we a had a full-fledged relationship outside of work for 7. I left him once I realized he was grooming our younger co-worker. Although I’ve broken it off, it’s been extremely difficult to co-exist with them at work. Not to mention once I broke up with him, it seems like all hell broke loose with my other co-workers. I’ve been treading burnout not feeling myself at all. I thought I could it, but I don’t want to anymore.

You are a tremendous help.i feel better.thank you for sharing this.ive been shamed and told I'm wrong about everything for so long. I put up with too much from the narc..

When people ask should they leave and walk away or should they stay? I think that's self explanitary they know they should but just like yourself when you yourself looked to other people for validation are you making the right choices I feel that that's really being asked here they just need the validation and confidence to go through with what they really do think. As you say we can feel stuck but the reason I feel they are asking is because the advice you give is golden. So if they know I know what I really should do and they hear it off you it will help people who are struggling make up their minds. That what they are thinking is right. The worst thing is is when your head is in battle with your heart because then people really are going back and forwards. Their abusers might have made them financially dependant on them and control their money and they know that they should go but how. Most sufferers arre either scared to death of them, at this point probably are really isolated from friends and family and I think they just need a plan or do what Whitney Houston did, pack aa small bag say your going out for milk and sugar, take the children and never come back

I think you are, indeed, a very well resolved person and I have learned a lot with your videos. Thank You! And if you decide to come to Portugal, please let me know. I live in Lisbon and I would like to give you a big kiss!

Great video Stephanie. Extremely clear and good guidance. Thank you.

The issues will repeat themselves so much with a narc that at some point the penny will drop for you. What you do next could shape the rest of your lives. Some try to solve the issues through marriage and kids. Don’t do it. Leave, keep any contact to a minimum and never look back.

You are genuine and humble strong women better them all the coaching women on here .. your awesome!!

I like this new look for you Stephanie you look great!🌷

I agree in the schools , love your videos, learning from you , it's helped me, I'm a life coach

This is a really pertinent video talk for me Stephanie, I obviously need to be honest with myself, and be able to strong enough to do what I need to do. ❤

It's very sad that the nar doesn't even know they are messed up. The extreme type does I guess. This is a disorder and it started because as a child they were ignored or picked apart? To me this is heartbreaking. A subconscious disorder. Yikes

I so appreciate you talking about narcissism! Yay!!

You are an amasing intuitive and giving person

How do you distinguish between when to give some one another chance vs when they shouldn't because they are narcissists?

This explanation brings so much clarity, thank you ❤️.

Tomorrow is my big day. I have to leave

God chastises those whom he loves. Just let it go.You deserve so much better.Forget their karma. It just doesn’t matter.