Which tool was most helpful for you? Timestamp 0:00 Intro 2:02 Rearrange your physical space 4:18 Give yourself time to recalibrate 6:47 Break up categories 9:06 Be patient & kind with yourself 11:42 Rest when needed 14:05 Ask for support 17:10 Reframe your situation 21:28 Why am I sharing this?
“Be patient and gentle with yourself.” Your sharing on how you don’t adapt as fast as your brother monk struck a chord in me. Throughout my transitions it always been very bumpy & emotional taxing for at least 6 months before I settle in. I think I am also a slow adaptor & over time I am able to observe this trait and know myself better. Will like to share another point which may be helpful and I think you have actually kind of explain it in the video - 💡 that is to define your own realistic expectations + honour & celebrate it when you meet them💡. Without this, it is going to be really easy to be affected by others’ comments or (maybe unrealistic) expectations of you. Sending love & support to all who are going through transitions, be it in any form. ❤
Taking the clean-out and restructuring of the spiritual and emotional spaces like the physical space. I can see the need for time and patience to go through the process with physical spaces, so viewing the internal spaces through the same lens helps to give me perspective and patience for my inner “reset”
"Give Yourself Time to Recalibrate" is very helpful as sometimes I get too hard on myself. Giving one's self time to adapt is a good mindset. Also, to be gentle and kind.
I just lost my dad. Even though I am an adult, this is a major life transition for me and my family. Now I understand why I am constantly cleaning and clearing out my stuff. And I learned that I have to be patient to let my inner life catch up. Thank you, Venerable Nick.
When my husband got sick and passed on, I had this urge to throw away "unnecessary" stuff in my house. It made me feel as if I throw away my negative feelings, fears etc
Your videos are custom made for my life experiences as they help me navigate the dark clouds that I routinely encounter. I have moved to a new state, I love it here but my mind has been very unstable . I tried asking for help, but to my dismay I didn’t get any. Your video provided me with a clear understanding of what I need to do and be . I thank you immensely 🙏🏼
Honestly, I need all these tools just to make the day to day living transitions manageable! My personal favorites when I feel stuck are to clean/organize/downsize my material surroundings, I am a committed list maker and nap taker. All such good advice for managing even a normal life! Thank you and bless you, kind soul🙏❤️
Proverbs 18:1 says: “Whoever isolates himself pursues his own selfish desires; he rejects all practical wisdom. The presence of God is daily prayers in your every day life. Psalm 91. Contribute to society and the economy. Matthew 20 and be a good steward. Luke 16:1-9. Avoid occults and denominations Isaiah 44:5-7
Rest when needed... oh my oh my. Asking for support, well... that doesn't always work. There are cases when one has to rely completely on oneself, even in the most catastrophic scenarios, and being weak and desperate is just not an option, strenght has to be created literally from nothing while the most violent blows just keep coming. It is achievable, but it transforms the individual for the rest of life. Just believe me.
yes. same here. But..i recently learned being angry with myself for failures was not helping anything..i was beginning to pay an even higher price..so..his videos reminding us to be gentler with self really matters..it is true. Anger & depression can & will kill us....& after surviving the struggles....i don't want to go out that way.
Yep, but first one has to actually survive them. It is downright scary when they keep coming for months on end, or even for years non-stop. There's just no time to take a longer breath.
@@Nedmar i hear that...have a deadbeat absentee landlord...& the plumbing in this house is a nightmare..neighbor upstairs flushes her toilet & all my drains gurgle, even the washing machine! ...sometimes..it physically backwashes into mine..ew..she just had a week off & was home for the duration, with her OCD crazy paper use & obsessive flushing she blocked my sink up....can't afford a plumber so..i'm trying to fix 4 leaks & unblock a sink on my own..to make it even more fun it just so happens this year is a rainy one & my RA is flaming out of control..fun times fun times..can't ask anyone for help cos ppl don't talk to each other around here unless it's to gripe about something silly, so, no thank you, don't need that petty drama ..i'm on my own... been 2 weeks now working on it & when it is all fixed(?)...probably the fridge will go or something else like that..previously it was the air conditioners, had to take em apart & clean em..they were full of stinky black mold. Never saw anything like it before, but what a smell..ugh..lol. It IS Never Ending. Brother Nicks videos keep bringing my mind back to a saner place. it is what it is, isn't it...
I see. Well, as for myself, I kept caring for my terminally ill mother who suffered one of the worst cancers one could imagine, more than a year 24/7 care carried out by myself, all alone. I was alone at her bed when she was released of her suffering, I was alone when she was buried, I was alone when I sold the flat and moved 2000 Km. away to my second homelad for good in search of a new life, and all this precisely when the war in Ukraine erupted and the world went nuts. One could barely imagine more uncertainty and chaos than that. And life was not easier before all this. Covid and all that stuff, you know. But hey, in the end one gets fully used to be a lone wolf, help is no longer needed from anyone at all, the basic need for another human being just vanishes. I wish you luck in solving those troubles of you.
The "Why Am I Sharing This" portion was helpful hearing that even you relate to us in these areas, too, and a confirmation to keep going! Thank you and blessings to you!
Thank you for this. Lots of changes in my life. Relationship, finances, home burned down ( no one was hurt, thankfully). Every one of these pieces of wisdom is helpful. Taking time was the most helpful , but they are all essential for me at this time. 🙏🏻
Thank you again Nick. Cleaning up my 'house' is being gentle to myself and taking the time because learning to live is not a quick fix. Making mistakes is always a new chance to learn (at 70 years of age).
Dear Nick, thank you for sharing these tools. I am also going through a change, changing a job from one city to my old city, and I thought in moments that I was crazy when I was tired or not capable of doing everything I usually could do! But our body sends us signals and we should listen to it. And everything will fall into the whole soon:)) Take care
I wish you well in your new job, I too am changing next month. Time, 1 day at a time I say, we don't know it all yet, we need to learn the new. Trust the we are capable of a lot more than we give credit for.. and it's OK to make mistakes... lol Where I was it just gave the others a laugh for a bit then you move on .. ie once I left a barrow at a house I deliverd to 😅 got ribbed for a bit, but I learnt to ALways check me barrow was on the van befor I drove off.
I feel like I am constantly transitioning. And I always do really well for a spell and then crash. All of this was helpful. The asking for help part made me emotional so perhaps that's an area I need to think on. You're voice and words are always very calming and help me focus. Thank you. ❤
I’m hoping this means that it’s not too late for me. I’ve been listening to you all morning and I keep slipping backwards. I’m 77 and you have given me new hope.
And i just lost my mother ❤. Thankful and sad and happy to go on with my own life. Thank you deeply for all your wonderful encouraging thoughts. It always helps me and makes me feel lively. Love. From Switzerland
For anyone who needs help and feels like a burden, many times you becoming vulnerable enough to ask someone will make the other person love you more for trusting them with your problem. And nothing ensures spiritual fitness more than helping others...so for anyone on both ends, there is a beauty in asking for support. Outstanding video Nick thank you. For myself I always forget about the rest part...and you nailed it, I rest even a few hours after doing a bunch of chores I will feel im being lazy, thank you for reminding me of balance.
For tip #1: Since I live alone and my living environment is similar to traditional Japanese living space- open and spacious, I apply this tip to my social space.
I need to listen and listen again to your video. The immediate take-away, because I am prone to compare myself to others and to believe that I need to advance at the same rate or otherwise something is wrong, can be challenged thanks to your insight that there are so many variables impacting an individual's pace at which they go through life transitions. And it's helpful to apply this wisdom to others' lives as well. Thank you!
Thank you for including your own current experience as part of this. I'm definitely one to try to shortcut my own needs during transitions. I, too, tend to adapt slower during transitions. Giving ourselves the time and space needed, is so important. As always, thank you. 💙🌟
My quality of life and peace of mind is beautiful thanks to your teachings and your books, The Building Blocks of Meditation, The Building Blocks of Meditation Journal, and The Buddhist Cleanse, The One Day Spiritual Detox. I’m up to “showering my mind,” 25 minutes each morning after rolling out of bed and completing The Five Tibetan Rites. I look forward to meditating every day, I wake up so happy. I’m so grateful for you and the truth and wisdom you share!
Precious teacher. Do take good care of your spiritual path while you are giving such great kindness to teach me. You are constantly in my mind and in transference of merit. May you be healthy, bright and know that you are appreciated and love. ❤️
Thank you so much 🙏🏾 ♥️ 👏🏿 🤗 this is so true 💯 as I'm about to relocate and start the process of finding myself and inner peace in my soul, I'm finding it so hard clearing out all the clutter in this home as I thought this would be my forever home but things have changed and one has to move on or we will be forever stuck and hamster wheeling but I love when you spoke about the whole scenario been scary and when you spoke about the rose 🌹 adapting to it's new environment for it's growth to continue that was absolutely amazing and this made me feel a lot calming and positive, keep doing what you do we'll keep watching and supporting you sending greetings, love and happiness to you and your family and all the subscribers have a wonderful and peaceful day 🙏🏾
Aww I’m glad the 🌹 analogy was helpful and please take the time to be very compassionate and kind to yourself during this move. Sending you my blessings 😊
Nick I had written a lengthy comment on this teaching and lost it. This lesson is a master class. Every word resonates and is applicable. It guides and hold fast in my learning. Thank you.
Venerable Nick, Thank you so much for sharing these tools to assist us when we experience change. They are so valuable. Change happens routinely and it’s important to remember that we can take things in our own timing and to seek support when needed and to find the silver lining in change. We tweak things and recalibrate to move through the various stages of change. Thank you for sharing your recent experience with change in moving from your time spent in America for the past months and returning to Thailand to a new routine. Your wisdom and kindness is always appreciated! ❤ Sending you blessings always. 🙏
Thank you Venerable Nick, your videos are always so helpful. I lost my mum in March this year to cancer, I've been feeling lost and thrown ever since. Trying to adjust to the transition it has been emotionally exhausting, but little steps like cleaning and routine help. I hope you feel more grounded soon. Thanks again for your helpful videos ❤
Thank you. I needed this. I'm starting a new chapter in my life after my boyfriend of 5 years ended the relationship. I'm still working on healing from this change in my life.
Thank you Nick! I am a mother of 4 transitioning into nursing school full time from being a stay at home mom! I am nervous but these will be my reminders to go back to! Thank you ❤
Hi Nick! I just found you on Saturday as I was clearing out my cluttered kitchen and have watched / listened to several videos in the last couple days. I felt compelled to reach out as I feel that you are touching me very deeply from far away! You are far from excluding yourself from society as you are guiding countless others on their own Journeys. You are a wonderful gift in this world and ! thank you from the bottom of my heart for being there for myself and everyone else you have reached! Bless you, my new friend😊
1. Yes, a simple, clean environment is essential to a peaceful mind. 2. We are too impatient today - we need to pause and collect ourselves. We are not good at this in society. 3. How do you eat an elephant - one bite at a time. 4. Self-love is needed, yes. 5. Tough one - so many of us have terrible sleep and resting routines. These habits do not come naturally - a real lack of "learning how" in this area. 6. Community, support, a circle of caring friends - much needed, and yet, so rare to see these days. 7. Being able to see the situation from several points and to be able to reset your viewpoint is crucial. Venerable Nic - thank you for sharing. It is good that you share that much of this is going to be an individual challenge for all of us. And for being honest in sharing your own challenges. We are all on a journey. It is good to share our experiences.
Thankyou Ven. Nick, this is very timely with my current situation. I'll resign from my low-end corporate work at the end of next month. I just really want a time off to slow down; reading books and meditate again, it really helped me to find what I'm really interested in from the inside (if that make sense). Honestly, changing direction is always scary, and sometimes having Asian parent really don't make the situation any easier... But whatever things that will turn out, I guess I'll happily change my life direction instead of being in my current situation.
I feel like this video was uniquely tailored just to my current situation. I've already re-arranged my physical space. I feel the most helpful of these other tools is to be kind to myself and to take time to rest.
Hey Nick! You are wonderful. I'm very happy that I found you. I've been into Buddhism for a year now. Just went bold for the first time in my life today. Love from Amsterdam! 🧘🏼♀️✨ I wish to meet you one day!
Venerable Nick, I am Tenzo, and moving towards monastic training, but, when I started at the Zen Center of Denver, I was tapped because I simply enjoyed, have always liked kitchens, many good memories from childhood. As I've brought my Zen practice from the Zafu to the kitchen, I find myself in my daily life, at home, becoming very similar to when I am doing my practice for my Sangha in my daily life. It feels as if one current is mixing into the other, without any difference, becoming one strong current that is carrying me on my way gratefully.
Nick, I appreciate you posting these videos. This year I focused on being the best person I can be for myself and my son. Your videos always provide great advice. Thank you
I have listened to many of your videos and found them helpful. This one came to my attention today. I am struggling as my partner had a bad fall and is now paralysed from the neck down. It happened mid July, he is still in hospital in a critical care unit here in the UK. I am blessed that the NHS covers the cost through this stage, but I don't know what will happen when he leaves hospital as he will always need a high level of care. I felt I had adjusted and learned to cope but I have been very tearful again lately. Many of your points resonated with me - I had instinctively cleared my space immediately after it happened. I didn't know why it felt important to me but I feel validated that you recommend it as a strategy. It's also helpful that you said about categorising and that the different areas need to catch up with each other. Sometimes I'm thinking how to nourish my body and soul, sometimes I'm worrying about all the paperwork I need to deal with that is involved in running a home. All alongside the time and emotional energy taken for hospital visits, and the deep deep pain of seeing him so injured and the sadness for myself now living alone and all our plans gone. We're both 68 so we are blessed to have had full lives, but that doesn't mean it's ok to have it snatched away. So this morning I listened to half your video and did some journaling and found that I do feel proud of myself in many ways. I wondered if it was ok to use the word proud, and when I resumed listening you used that word, and I felt so grateful for that. And it's ok that I still cry because the situation is tough and I need to be very gentle on myself, give myself time. I've been reaching out to people and grateful for the love, support and care I have received. This afternoon I am in bed listening to the second half of your video and thinking I should rest, but the clearing and tidying I did at the beginning has fallen by the wayside and I don't like living in a muddle. I've unburdened this to you dear Nick. I'm going to get out of bed and take a walk now. Then I will phone a friend, and then I will clean my kitchen.
Thank You. 😌 Proud of You taking this huge step traveling all da way to Thailand and continuing sharing the knowledge with us.🌱 Wish You a Happy and Peacefully exciting Journey. 💖
I am so grateful to you Nick. My son is going through the stressful high school to college process. Your words this morning inspired me to help him going through this fase of his life even more. He is my “rose”. What a beautiful image you gave us to understand everything takes time. ❤🙏
Aww that’s such an important time for him. Yes once he has these tools, he can take the pressure off himself as he goes through this transition. Please send my regards to him and please keep us updated on his/your progress 😊
Reframe.and sharing your own story..yes....really helpful. I am closing one chapter and opening another, new friendships and yet it's very scary. A lot of my fears and insecurities are coming up. All of the tips were super helpful.❤🙏
"seeing your situation accurately"- yes. When I do this, with no cravings to skew the scene, I have to acknowledge that life for me is great- few worldly cares, few worldly possessions, and I am free. Less is more, small is beautiful, simple is best.
Many thanks for this video. I had a psychksis after mental abuse. I jumped of 3 stores building of my employer. I temporarily lost my son, had 3 surgeries on a scattered leg, broken arm and foot, lost my job, house, independance for 2 years, a lot a lot of money, even all my books and cloths. Stayed with my dad for 2 years, he's on the spectrummNow back on my feet, new appartment, town, job, just won a court session against my ex trying to take my son to another city. Used the summer to rearrange my appartment, buy a the necssary stuff, new cloths, cook healthy meals. I have ptcsd, but happy to move forward and love my son. Did my first yoga exercices this morning with my handicaps after more then 2 years. Set boundaries to my a critical mother last weekend. Tomorrow first day in new school, but instead of preparing the courses i am lying in the couch because i need rest. It a slow but wonderful journey. Lots of love to all of us in transition. We have got this ❤
Wow thank you for sharing your experience. That is definitely a big adjustment and transition. Keep up the good work and gently navigate this path. Please keep us updated on your progress, my friend :-) you’re doing great.
Thank you for this video. Today i allowed myself to do nothing for the morning apart from rest, feed myself and my dogs, tidy my space and just chill out. I feel lighter in my body & mind. This afternoon i provide my acts of service, i can even feel myself looking at this from a different perspective.
What bothers me is that tips are like lifehacks, what I need is finding a holistic feeling of best me so any tips are apparent to me because I know by heart what to do and what not to do. World is full of advices but we can't just blindly swallow that. There must be highest purpose and it is probably even non verbal. Love fits that criterion.
@@nickkeomahavong01 funny to hear that you are not fully adopter to Thailand. I'm from Ukraine and when I was there it took me around 1-2 weeks to feel home in Thailand, don't know why (yeah, I know... fruits... :) We have war in our country and I can't travel because men can't go abroad as of now. But I want to come back to Thailand again and feel this nice country and people.
Thank you Nick. The last 4 years have been a mess.... 2 of my closest friends passed, I lost my dog, my job, and now my health is compromised (I've always been fit, taken way bettter care of myself than most) and the hits just keep coming. I've haf serious challenges before, but there's always been more than enough good to make things easier. Not sure what the lesson is that I need to learn from all this sadness, but I have to keep moving forward, one step at a time.
Thank you Nick. Your thoughtfulness and compassion and honesty are all deeply appreciated. I feel you are a much loved and needed companion on this road of change. Gail
I appreciate you for posting this video. I am currently in a life transition, moving out of the country. However, due to external factors, I'm not able to hit the ground running. However I have used this opportunity to delve more into my faith and pray and meditate often. I am beginning to understand the importance of being calm and grounded during this time of transition.
Thank you Ven Nick. I loved it and I am right there, going through everything that you said. On the other hand it has been my experience that when I continue to ask to see the Path, the answers start to come and there you were, suddenly popped on my screen. Reassuring. 🙏💐🙏 Sadhu, sadhu, sadhu.
Dear Venerable Nick, i find this and many other of your videos as a great support for me. Sending you my deep gratitude and Metta. 🙏🙏🙏🙏 May you to find every support you need💐
Yes! My father started an intense decluttering after my mum's death which I couldn't really understand at the time. Now, as he has died himself, I experience the same need and it does help. I didn't want to in the beginning, but I was simply forced to sort out his appartment and so it kicked off for me.
I cant thank you enough for these thoughtful steps. When one is in the throws of massive change its impossible to think of this. You have really helped me. Thank you so much❤
Always timely Ven. Nick. I just had to leave a county I grew up in, a job I’d been at for 35 years to a city I never lived in 400 miles from home. Now, again, I need to move to a totally new and unknown county due to affordability. I have been through turmoil since 2016 when my father passed, three years after my mom. Then I had a serious health issue. Then we got evicted due to owners of the rental duplex we had lived in for 20 years got sold. Thus all the moving ensued . I know others have suffered much worse and I send metta to you. Breaking up categories is really helpful. Also being gentle and kind as well as resting. Thank you Ven. Nick for these truly helpful videos! 😌🙏
Hello Michele! My condolences to your and your family. Wow that’s a lot of major changes. I can only imagine. Please take it step by step and be very gentle and kind to yourself. Sending you my blessings. Please keep us updated on your progress 😊
Hi, Im glad I continued to this post, Im starting a new job soon. I like my old job but I have an opportunity to work in a special need school. But this month Ive been changing my mindset, shifting my focus though continuing my role, but gradually talki g to tbe peoples who i won't see anymore customers and colleagues.. I will be sad but just briefly.. Ready to make new freindships and help others in a different way.. but I like your info of clearing at home.. making way for change.. I need to sort my wardrobe too as No actual uniform anymore 😊 xx
Greetings from New Jersey!🍂🌞 Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and experience with us! My only child, (Nick also) bought a house, I've been a single mom since he was 4, now 20 years later, I'll be alone. I'm a yoga teacher still learning so much, thank you for your teachings! Do you practice yoga ? Be well, Nina❤
3 years ago after a traumatic life basically, i decided to focus on myself at 47. It is only now that i feel more balanced. I understand what you say about allowing the time to unfold at its own pace. I believe that i have laid the foundations & my roots are now penatrating through the soil. Thank you
Thank you Nick. Your wisdom is prescient as my life is changing at age 66 so your words reverberated for me..I know they are true and an answer to questions I asked spirit to guide me. I have made many changes as I lived in Hong Kong/Shenzhen, China and vacationed in Thailand often and hope to come to Chiang Mai for the retreat, it is my DREAM. My meditation focuses on Plum Village and Thay teachings.
❤ this was perfect it was just what I needed to hear I needed some insight in terms of dealing with what seemed like a hopeless situation getting worse and worse and now I have a new perspective to find new ways of living thank you so much this whole series is just a blessing to everyone thank you thank you.
I've just listened to the video and scrolling through the comments it looks like yours has slipped through the net and got no response. So I know it's a month late but I want to say I hear you, and hope that you are finding the strength to cope with you situation.
Proverbs 18:1 says: “Whoever isolates himself pursues his own selfish desires; he rejects all practical wisdom. The presence of God is daily prayers in your every day life. Psalm 91. Contribute to society and the economy. Matthew 20 and be a good steward. Luke 16:1-9. Avoid occults and denominations Isaiah 44:5-7
