That part The way this generation is raised to be entitled, spoiled, & disrespectful; they won't be able to take care of themselves let alone anyone else.
@@aarongray1981 Again, if you didn't "raise you kids" right not America standards "Give me, Give me". Yes, they will still turn on you. Teach your kids about the system and why you MUST stick together. Another thing leave something behind hint "$$$" or "business" to help your kids out. Another thing have more kids. Why not create an Army
Then wait till they find out when the nursing home takes your home and 90% of your social security income. Imagine working all of your life only to give your retirement and savings to a nursing home facility to be neglected and possibly abused.@@problemchild756
I’m hoping this country will then respect and change its attitude towards poor and middle class mothers and families. More maternal leave months, free and affordable childcare, better healthcare for expectant mothers, etc…Affordable food and homes for everyone, more PTO, etc…
I think you mean the next 6 years,…. I think you should read Morgan Stanley 2019 report on the “she economy” by 2030 45% of all women will be single and childless.
Have children because you want a family, not because you are looking for someone to take care of you in old age. Focus on building wealth, that way you can receive all the care you need without worry.
@myronbourne6937 I have two educated daughters in their early 40s. They are single and unmarried and have no children. My oldest is a bilingual supervisor at her company. My youngest works at the State Department in DC in the Office of Civil Rights. They are in Dubai for the New Year. They are not broke or alone because God is so good.
if they wanted someone to take care of them they could easily adopt. Wtf is this. You have kids to past on your blood line or to have a family. @@lillianrhone8485
@vpack7623. So true! We as children are mere extensions of our parents, good or bad. My parents told me not to embarrass them! I haven't and still show respect to them even though they are no longer alive.
I agree with you 💯 👍 I have worked in the healthcare system for 20 years, and I have seen women with husbands,children, and siblings who have been too selfish to take care of their family members. Also, some men and women have burned too many bridges in their lives, resulting in being abandoned in their time of need.
Blood may be thicker than water but even blood has a boiling point. Another thing, parents stop favoring one child over another. I am witnessing this now with family. The spoiled child has disappeared from the parents lives while the one who lived a decent life and was shat on is now the trusted one to handle the affairs. You reap what you sow.
Absolutely, my younger sister was the favorite but when my mother was dying I was the one who was responsible for taking care of her bills, finances and my grandmother. That favorite one was nowhere to be found. She was gone and didn't care about any of us.
I have got sisters who have got more than 8 children each and have lost their husbands. None of the children are taking care of them, they have all run away. I am the only one who is supporting both my sisters. You can have as many children as you can but it is not guaranteed that they are going to take care of you.
@jaumartinez9006 Why did you tell him to shut up? Did his statement touch a nerve? Do you have children that feel abused by you and perhaps they feel the same way about you? Because I don't know otherwise how his statement could have so easily aroused such hostility.
I'm sorry you had to go through that. Maybe you were chosen to take care of him/her because it gives you a chance to talk to them about it. Also, the situation forces him/her to listen to you about it.
@jaumartinez9006 Have you ever heard the saying that a hit dog yelps the loudest? "Then don't and shut up" sounded like a yelp, so I asked you about it. Anyway, it doesn't matter. peace
Many elderly people who are childless and have no kin are usually dumped on the street by hospitals because they also have no medical insurance. It’s a very sad site to see.
actually it does. now if you a single mama who raise feminine boys and compete with your fast azz daughters then yes aint no one going to take care of you. but if you have a 2-parent home and raise your children with morals and then if your parents raised moral upstanding brothers and sisters then you will have a large family and increase the chances that you will have help. notice how most black TV shows and movies from back in the day had 3-4 generations living in one house. can't have that wif skwong innapennant, dont needz no manz type modern women today. we aint worried about the men. men are used to living along, ending up homeless and dying alone. it is you women that when you get older and that shock to your system hits you when no one is around to save you.
@@mariahyman2025 Yeah, guys-- I've said it before... I think our generation's been sold a bill of goods on all the individualism and "get rich quick" lifestyle schemes. It was all a sham to have as many people as possible dedicate their productive years to feeding corporate interests and convince us all that our life's goals should be about purchasing the most expensive objects possible in order to attain higher social status. We been duped. Our Souls, Flesh and Blood are the only treasures there ever were.
I worked in a hospital for many years… when one nurse became terribly Ill, her kids didn’t give her a service; they just buried her. Her husband had already passed years earlier btw.
My parents had 13 children together. Most importantly, we were raised right as well. We had our good and bad days - believe me. Now we're grown, it's really nice because we are there for one another. Both of my parents died. My dad died last year. It's challenging but worth the positive results.
People should be having kids IF+WHEN they have stable relationships and can afford to take care of them. You shouldnt turn your children into hospice care kids. regardless of gender, having kids as a retirement+care plan is selfish and foolish. There is NO guarantee that they will take care of you in old age. Some people (Men AND women) are in nursing homes right now and have kids that dont come to visit them.
you folks are very selfish. that is your job as an ADULT. worse than animals. there are no nursing home in other countries. nursing homes are a MODERN day invention for SELFISH people to chuck their elderly into. just like daycare for children. all modern day inventions.
I looked after my grandma but will not be doing that for my my parents because they always deprived me of opportunities to succeed in life because of their laziness and due to that I ended up having a hard life...they will reap what they sowed🤷♂️ R.I.P grandma 😢
just because you have locks on your door doesn’t guarantee your safety. You still lock your doors. Family accounts for 95% of non professional healthcare. The point is it would be smart to boost your odds by having family. It’s generally understood nothing is absolute/guaranteed … It’s smarter to consider the exceptions but not focus on them.
@@JasonOrtiz-ye1do To me, they pretend they don’t get the point because they are committed to misunderstanding the point. Why? Hit dogs I guess lol Focusing on exceptions seems to be a form of diversion or distraction from the general truth. People have to cope with their unfortunate reality somehow.
Once again we see things only get serious when women are negatively impacted. If men have to face the reality of leaving this world as a John Doe, women should be prepared to leave as a Jane Doe.
@@kaybrown7733 where or when in my comment did I say kids are an insurance policy? Please read to comprehend instead of rushing to make an idiotic statement.
@@kaybrown7733 are you trolling me or are you that bad at comprehension? Never once did I ever mention kids in my comment but because you're so bad at understanding things I'll simplify it for you. No one cares when men are negatively impacted by tragedy. Only when it involves women are when things get serious.
Our race was also decimated by the Viet Nam War. This is something that is never talked about. We forget about the fact that we lost a great number of men,, and the ones that returned were so damaged, and there was no recovering policies in effect to deal with the damage that our men suffered. These men were not even celebrated, I wonder Why?
So many men who cheated/divorced their wives to be with the “young hottie” are now abandoned, and on their sick bed alone. This issue is frightening for all people who are approaching HELPLESSNESS. (TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOURSELVES AS BEST AS YOU CAN).
Come on Phil...do you know how many people whose family do not show up for them? It's about your trusted circle, that might include family and friends. Suggestion: It is likely to happen when you can observe how someone responds to family and friends when they get sick. Watch closely. You're seeing an example of how you're likely to be treated (dependent on the relationship with the person). Also do a self-check...are you helping people? And just because you do, it doesn't mean that same family or friend will do the same if you were in that situation.
You'd be surprised. It's not just black women. I'm a Hispanic guy who's in his upper 30s and not only I but the vast majority of my friends across a variety of ethnicities don't have any kids nor want any. I'm in the only-child camp, too and so have no siblings. I have longtime friends but we are drifting apart and becoming acquaintances for the most part. Relatives-wise, my cousins are the closest relatives I have of the same biological & immigrant generation (grandchildren of immigrants from Puerto Rico) and most of them have relocated or otherwise stopped attending family functions in the 2010s. IIRC the farthest our structure made it the 'empty nest' stage but no weddings, kids, etc after the Boomers/Gen X had theirs.
@@gdcskates Actually my mother lost 1 before & 1 after me (miscarriages). We would have been a family of 3 kids otherwise. Of note though, I do not know any family who planned to have only 1 kid; every couple either decided on multiple kids or none at all. Statistics on birth rates for women who had at least 1 kid back this point up. So interestingly the falling birth rates are due to more people choosing to forgo kids altogether vs deciding to have less.
There is no guarantees in life period! Even if you have a spouse or children, unfortunately, they can die before you or abandon you. In fact I know a lady in a nursing home who has three daughters and has absolutely no relationship with any of them.
My grandmother is 81 years old, lives alone but has 3 sons and a grandson to hold her down when need be. We enjoy being a help to her because of how much she poured into us over the years!
I'm single with ZERO dependents! I refuse to sit around worrying about getting old and desolate! I have 2(1 nephew-in-law) nieces, a nephew, grandnieces and grandnephew. I have a great relationship with them. I was promised that i would be taken care of. The Lord is always with me so I'm good!
@@Slow-Rolling If you read my question again, you'll see that I asked her what if HER HEALTH IS GOOD enough for her to TAKE CARE OF HERSELF in her old age. Because it isn't necessary for me to think about getting sick at all, much less everyday. Anyway, your intentions are good, so whatever.
Invest in long term care insurance instead of having kids with the hopes that they'll take care of you when you're older. There are no guarantees and it's selfish to have kids for the sole purpose of someone being there to wipe your ass when you're no longer able to.
It's interesting since when I volunteered at a nursing home - there were almost no resident who were child free. They almost all had children. Their children are the ones who put them there! Some visit, some don't. Your children aren't obligated to care for you as you get older and often don't.
Liz black woman that can't get a man for a tha. I be saying all the time. Yeah, I'm done with the black dudes. I'm gonna go over and find me a white man. 's wanna get me a white boy
You gotta break it down a little bit. She was rejected by the black band for a reason. I write? Then she's got 4 kids. Five baby daddy's alright? And now she's gonna go over and get her a white man?
you get a thumbs down, and that the problem in this country. you ARE suppose to take care of the elders. this is the culture in other countries worldwide. this is SAD. selfish s%$m#*g.
What happens when you out live every one. All your kids,husband, and some of your grandchildren. Will your grandchildren or great grandchildren take care of you? This needs to be discussed in every family.
Sometimes family is thinner than water and friends are thicker than blood Some kids don't want to care for or even visit their parents once they leave home even though they treated their kids well
Whenever I hear that quote “blood is thicker than water,” my rebuttal is without water, there is no blood. Family is a joke; trust me on this. As a man, family, to me, is useless. Not to mention without me, what use are they as a whole.
That’s the natural order of things. You take of them when they’re too young. When you’re old and weak and they’re bigger and stronger, they take care of you. Yes, some parents kill their kids and vice versa but that doesn’t mean we all go against the grain. You raise them to understand this responsibility. I take loving care of my children. I go above and beyond basic needs. And some parents don’t even do that. I tell them all the time to appreciate this and I expect the same from them when the time comes. I’m building it into them now. Parents that give their all and work till they can’t anymore expect a return on their investment. We don’t pay for everything and sacrifice so these people can grow up and never look back.
If kids are supposed to take care of their parents, then why do people save for retirement? why do people have IRA's, pensions etc? And won't those kids have kids of their own in the future? So let me get this staright, Kids should grow up, start a family of their own, while simultaneously taking care of their parents? Who the hell wants to deal with all that liability and why should it be a Kids responsibility to take care of their parents?
That’s what happens. They call it the “sandwich” generation. Basically where you are taking care of elderly parents and taking care of young children at the same time. I have parents in their 70s and two kids under the age of 10. Fortunately my parents are still self sufficient but they might need more care as they age. 🤷🏻♀️
But why wouldn't you want to take care of your elderly parents? And people have been taking care of their parents and children for decades it not new. The right thing is to care for your sick elderly parents. It's easier said then done I see why some people wouldn't. If you're not gonna take them in at least make sure someone else will treat them right and make sure they are healthy and cared for and visit them regularly.
No blood is not thicker then water. And just because people have children don't mean their kids are going to take care of their parents. I been watching for years families from 2 to 10 siblings arguing about who going to take care of Of the mother or father, grandmother or grandfather. Let's be honest a lot of adult grown children are not trying to give up their best life . To be a care giver. And let the truth be told being a care giver is not an easy task. And that's a fact.
I agree and social services is still full with parents abandoned by their their children while the children spend their parents savings or benefits while waiting for the parent to pass so they can kill each order over inheritance etc. There are no guarantees in this life. Most people put their parents in homes because they can't provide the proper medical assistance the parent may require or because they have to work full-time and care for their own children. Also, some people don't want to bring children into this mess. Period.
My aunt was educated single I dont need a man, died all alone at her home, a family member found her unalive on the floor in bedroom. No kids, no husband.
Sorry for your loss. However, even if she had a husband, it is most likely he would've died before her anyways. Men statistically died before women. Just facts. Even if she had children, they are not living with her and she chose to live alone, then it's natural thst she would die alone. But many people die alone everyday with or without family. When it's your time, it's your time...period. It's a train you can never stop.
YOUR FRIENDS ARE YOUR AGE WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU OUTLIVE THEM? THESE ARE BAD PLANS. THEY ARE DESPERATE PLANS AND COULD HAVE BAD OUTCOMES. I HAVE SEEN IT PERSONALLY.
Many people outlive family too. It’s all a crapshoot. All we can do is plan the best way we can. Having a plan of support and implementing it with family and/or friends is better than not having anything at all.
He's making no sense, just throwing out head lines to get views, having children doesn' t guarantee they're going to take care of you when you're old. He sounds clueless and dumb.
A feel good story for women. Friends will tell you they will be there to support you then when you REALLY need their support they are out of there. Now victim Olympics for single women.
Thank you Uncle Phil for your very informative and enlightening content! I am age 73 and a Passport Gentleman with my U. S. PASSPORT. I meet two traditional young women in Puerto Plata one is a DOMINICANA and the other is a HAITIANA! They both are respectfully and they are both SPOILING ME with their traditional femininity and their cooperativeness and I'm SPOILING both of them with my CHICAGO SOUTHERN HOSPITALITY. I thank God Yehweh for me being an OLD BLACK AMERICAN MAN with my PASSPORT! Viva Uncle Phil! Viva Kevin R. Samuels.
Plenty of elderly people who raised a family and gave their kids their all and still get left in a nursing home. Don’t rely on anyone for taking care of you in life. At any age.
False again, many men walk around and don’t want kids because they don’t want to be strung out by the court system on child support and being controlled by the mother . Dude you speak on some good points you are also incorrect on many also
It is not the care but companionship that people in nursing homes miss the most. Nurses and CNAs are only there to do a job. Then you are left to your TV and a roommate if you have one.
That scenario about leaving the documents and passwords, doesn't just apply to single women...That goes for anybody, that has any type of assets or things that they want to leave behind for their loved ones, to have full access to... Has nothing to do with being single
ALSO, IN THE U.S. CHILDREN ARE EXPENSIVE, CHILD CARE, NO PAID FAMILY LEAVE, MINIMUM WAGE AT 7.50 PER HOUR, NO UNIVERSAL HEALTH CARE, CHILD CARE IS EXPENSIVE, HOUSING COSTS ARE HIGH AS HELL --- IN OTHER WORDS, AMERICA IS NOT CONDUCIVE TO HAVING ALL THESE CHILDREN THAT PHIL WANT US TO HAVE ---
I wouldn't have kids because I EXPECT them to take care of me when I'm older. My kids would have a life of their own and I would be selfish to stop them from living their lives.
Phil, I have to disagree with this. Not all of us who are single with no children, worry. Most of us contingency plan in place . Let me just state that some of us were not around here stating we don't need or want a man or didn't want children (furthest thing from our minds in our 20s, 30s). Unfortunately, some of us were in abusive relationships during that time; some were unable to have children, and some of us had to take care of parents and/or siblings at a young age, etc. When you look up, boom .. you're in your 50. P.S. There are quite a few men who have never been married or have children as well.
Both genders are important but we have to be clear that we are different. A man could wake up at 50 and decide to have a biological baby. Unfortunately, ladies don't have this opportunity and we have to blame biology. Ladies don't have room for mistakes when picking a partner.
@gilvettab222 Can't you understand that this man Phil is a Redpill/Manosphere Douche a.k.a a BW Hater? Why doesn't he tell the men who want children so badly to go and adopt? Why is he not complaining about single BM with no kids? Haven't you figured it out yet?
And while I do kinda agree with what @@tipsandtricks6071is saying, I have to point out that that's still a lil too later in life for a man to be starting fatherhood especially around 50 (God forbid on if his health isn't intact to live long enough to see the child grow up).
Phil now I usually agree with you but on this I disagree. These kids don't give a ish about there parents. Having a spouse isn't all it is crap up to be...I have seen black women dying of cancer and their black husband won't stop cheating. If your a good person God will always provide for you.
@jurnee21485 How you going to tell me what I have seen and experienced is lies????? You just make sure your a good person so someone will be there for you.
@@ms.dekatur7082 Exactly! The only liiiieeeesss here are whatever lies he chooses to tell himself, to convince himself, that the truth you just shared is a lie. Either that, or he's trollin'.
I have been reading these comments. I am astonished at the number of people who actually believe the family is not important when you become older and unable to take care of yourself at 57 years old. I am disable Divorce and I will be devastated without the love and support of my children. I could not imagine Facing my future without their support
I’m happy that you have your family. I only have my mom and when she is gone that’s it. I couldn’t have children and my now ex husband cheated. So, I have to build my own support. A lot of us do feel family is important. It’s just that not all of us have family we can go to and depend on.
They didn't think about that when they were trying to be all bad by themselves. They'll be ok. Their granddaughters and nieces will make good CNA's to take care of them.
That doesn't mean nothing because you have children because these children doesn't have way take care of their parents these days. I tried to take care of myself as best as I can.
It's sad, that the only plan, that alot, of people have for when they get old, or sick is automatically, assuming that, their children/ family members, will take care of them. They never even consider the possibility, that they, may very well, end up in a nursing home.
This is why you take care of yourself in your youth so that you aren’t a burden on anyone. Children aren’t here to be your social security. Most women have to be single mothers so what is the point of the struggle? I am so happy to see Black women choosing their own happiness and not living with obligation and struggle over their heads. So many Black women walking away from toxic relationships, closing off their wombs and even disowning relatives. They are letting their bald-headed mamas rot in the projects! Have children because you want to be a mother not just because it is “something to do”. Children didn’t ask to be invited to toxic cycles and poverty struggles which is the reality for most Black people.
I have a cousin who checks on me from time to time. He does it voluntarily. Right now is mother is 82 year old mother is in rehab and doing much better. I visit with her often. All I can say is how important it is to maintain contact with your family if at all possible.
Alot of older American men are living the ends of their lives in the Philippines, Thailand, Dominican Republic, or Brazil. Cheaper cost of living and better women 0:05
The reason that women who are single & childless by choice bother the community is, because at the end of their lives they end up the old auntie that the family ends up stuck with.
lol It's Not OUR women. It's The Government's Women because they are Serving as the Dairy Cows at Uncle Sam's dairy farm.. every single one of them.. It'll be OUR women when they Serve US men against everybody else..
Your children and husband can leave you to fend for yourself in your old age or committ elder abuse.😑 There needs to be communities built where single women support each other.
The women in the community are almost a negative many of them only brought up the negative aspects of having a family even though it’s mostly beneficial
Wonder what dead beat dad's will do. They in those places with no one either. Yall keep believing these bitter bm they are in bad shape in these area right now!
Because the community is seeing throngs going on the wrong direction and it will have adverse effects we are tired of that especially baby mama culture and lack of birth control use
Increased focus is on black american women and women in general. Not obsession. As there is not much emotion given in this just consideration of the facts of society
lol, men in general are used to living and dying alone. that aint the issue, it is the skrong innapenant wimenz dat dont needz no manz that spent their young years getting free drinks, free stuff from men and then hit the wall and see a decline and worse when they end up homeless and die alone.
As an adult, no one deserves anything (good or bad) unless they worked for it, won a court case for it or made a choice (consistently stuck with it) and went down a path towards something.
