Omid Djalili - There Will Never Be a Female Pope

Просмотров 1,2 млн

% 14 812

#OmidDjalili on dealing with stereotypes, why women are better than men, and struggling to get an American work visa.
Omid Djalili stand up from the Just For Laughs Festival in 2015.
#OmidDjaliliJFL #OmidDjaliliStandUp
Subscribe: bit.ly/1ShFiDP
Watch more #StandUp from #JFL : bit.ly/2M0R2j4
FOLLOW JFL :
Facebook: bit.ly/1qbX9p0
Twitter: bit.ly/1RG2uuI
Website: bit.ly/1pFZ2d1
ABOUT #JUSTFORLAUGHS :
Just For Laughs is the world’s premiere destination for #standupcomedy. JFL produces the world’s largest and most prestigious comedy event every July in Montreal, as well as annual festivals in Toronto and Sydney. On this channel, you will find comedic clips from some of the most legendary comedians in the business: Chris Rock, Bill Burr, Kevin Hart, and more. We also feature stand-up from newcomers such as John Mulaney, Bo Burnham, and Amy Schumer. If you just want to laugh, you’re in the right place.

Приколы

Опубликовано:

19 сен 2018

Ссылка:

Скачать:

Готовим ссылку...

Добавить в:

Мой плейлист

Посмотреть позже

Комментарии : 612

@Ragazar 5 лет назад

To be fair we had a guy called Mohammed at work, and when he left he was replaced by another guy called Mohammed.

@SuperLusername 5 лет назад

What about Ahmed?

@samirahsamir6930 5 лет назад

Ragazar OM Allah 😂😂 Mohamed left another Mohamed replaced

@MrAnadad 5 лет назад

When you see Farsi worse than Americans

4 года назад

How bout Hassan?

@muamerblazevic1837 4 года назад

😂

@southlondon86 4 года назад

“Have you ever incited genocide?” “No but the night is young”

@nawafabughazalah1345 5 лет назад

He pronounced Arabic really well for an Iranian 😘

@mortyh.4076 4 года назад

Arabic is being taught in Schools in Iran. There are also many Arabs living in Iran.

@miraexo3705 4 года назад

@@mortyh.4076 yeah i'm maroccain live in iran

@FINDINGFITNESS101 4 года назад

@@mortyh.4076 He was brought up in U.K , not Iran!

@gromhellscream4487 4 года назад

@@mortyh.4076 We are not taught arabic well.It's an elementary education and it's not effective because our education system is shitty in general.

@mehrshadvr4 4 года назад

@@mortyh.4076 I never learned Arabic. Barley passed it. Lol And he was born in U.K.

@treeoftrees7523 2 года назад

I see Omaid I click Like 🧡

@adusasu1065 5 лет назад

100 times better than russell peters

@DennisFernandes-SG 2 года назад

No one can vent in that hyped-up Arab voice as you can. Love it!

@vinny42042 3 года назад

The winning combination guy and also in mummy and gladiator

@Protectobot 5 лет назад

Lol, I had 2 Persian-Iranian coworkers named Mohammed. Even after one of them quit cos he had back problems and needed work involving less manual labor for a while, the other Mohammed still legally changed his name when he got American citizenship status cos he HATED his name and said it was so common in Iran, so he made his family nickname into his real first name :)

@dfreeman13 4 года назад

The Catholic Church should avoid my mother. She’ll find the holy grail and the arc of the covenant. The whole secret archives would be made public.

@EternalVirgin 3 года назад

Wow, I thought that was just an Asian thing. Turns out moms everywhere are excellent detectives.

@tanyakasim3988 3 года назад

Your mom would be a great detective or archaeogist. ☺️

@drkimy 6 лет назад

I never forget Djalili family. On 24th of December 1969 as I arrived in London I stayed at their home for a few days before I went to Brighton. God bless his mother & hope his dad is healthy.

@ameerahtoyfunreview9674 6 лет назад

Wooow long time ago

@drkimy 6 лет назад

Yeah, but love stays in ones mind. I knew his family in Iran & they helped me......Ooooh

@3ZOZ1KSA1BOY 5 лет назад

You must be 80 years old now

@drkimy 5 лет назад

@@3ZOZ1KSA1BOY be very cautious! I'm 67. So what? I just wrote a memorial from the past. I live somewhere else in Europe much better than England full of poor jobless people with those ancient houses. When I see old commedies like On The Buses, I see nothing has changed since those years, whether in Brighton, Newcastle-upon-Tyne or Weybridge in Surrey where I had an expensive house. I sold all & live now as a German citizen: So du kannst mich mal.....!!

@3ZOZ1KSA1BOY 5 лет назад

drkimy sorry for hurting your felling but your memory is 50 years old and the fact that someone in your age interact with youtube is very rare it’s unseen mostly so i without thinking to much thought you are 80 years old . Sorry again and i hope you live past 80 years old .

@waratthewarfield 5 лет назад

I remember this guy in "The Mummy"

@TheCoolerChannel 5 лет назад

waratthewarfield ok I knew I wasn’t crazy, you sir saved me a google

@pippa_peg 4 года назад

THANK YOU

@23pyromaniac 4 года назад

"His neck did not break!"

@EonStormcrow 4 года назад

@@23pyromaniac "What else? I'm a very... lonely man..."

@myst93 4 года назад

"STEP OVA THA THRESHOLD!"

@SimonKaguru 6 лет назад

..."My newborn son, James Blunt..." I swear that caught me off guard 🤣🤣🤣🤣

@xdmoath 5 лет назад

who is james ?

@cutielol0 5 лет назад

I did not understand that joke

@BORAT979 5 лет назад

That was legendary

@werebilbyj4449 3 года назад

Omid is one of the most underrated actors. Absolutely brilliant. If you don't recognise him, he played the prison warden in the Mummy (Brendan Fraser version). He was also in Black Books when he tricked Manny into being a "photography model". Hehe. This man is a damn talent! I didn't realise he was s comedian to boot!

@artikagunathasan4040 6 лет назад

I feel like I haven't seen him in years. Killed me with the Egyptian football commentary.

@MosnoAlMoseeki 6 лет назад

Goooon Gooon Wallahi! :D

@barbarahallinan1151 6 лет назад

arika guasnahabair e............he has not seen his feet in years.

@joermundgand 5 лет назад

Icelandic football commentary is very similar, I guess we Scandinavians are also an excitable people.

@irenekruger4577 5 лет назад

Love his comedy

@merriamalwani1082 5 лет назад

Artika Gunathdotdotdot I’m sorry but that joke was stolen from Moe Amer. Check him out

@Mastersh1t 6 лет назад

By far the best delivery out there. Love his comedy.

@oakpoacher433 6 лет назад

I see what you did there......

@6luealreadydead 5 лет назад

He does an amazingly good American accent for sum1 who naturally has a british accent👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

@jsquared1013 6 лет назад

He was spot on with the soccer commentary, that is exactly what the beIN Sports announcer sounds like 🤣🤣

@jedskulls4295 5 лет назад

But the moron on Bein is not Egyptian, he is from Tunis !

@ProfessorSlime283 5 лет назад

True haha

@KL-bu4sj 5 лет назад

jsquared1013 use

@ThePunisher014 5 лет назад

@@jedskulls4295 I think there are more than just Chawali as commentators at beIN sports. but then again he's the most famous-successful one he just makes morons from egypt and the middle east sound boring as fuck. and Tunis is a capital city, not a nation. mr. butthurt egyptian.

@harlemthamry8839 3 года назад

True story: Once I bought a second hand fitness band with a phone directory from an Egyptian gentleman. That fellow forgot to reset his watch. When I checked out phone directory, first names that turned up where roughly 35x Ahmed (with helpful definitions such like son of Mohammed, the Taxi driver) and some +60x Mohammed. Honestly, I can‘t quite remember but if I am not mistaken, the seller‘s name was indeed Mohammed.

@kjellhl1975 6 лет назад

I watched him along with my breakfast, and I got in such a good mood that now I am in high spirit to meet the rest of today.

@mirasolovklose3888 5 лет назад

Nooooooooo, you forgot the rule! Don't get high on your product.

@gifsec3601 5 лет назад

And in return you made my day with your comment.😁👌

@iamkman 5 лет назад

That is exactly what a person should do, you wake up , watch something funny and it makes you happy for the day!! its what you think about the world

@MyPronounsISwhom 5 лет назад

I love this.. ten months later im hoping you're still groovin

@hediboughanmi722 5 лет назад

same routine here

@jackgaulsfitnessvlog4802 5 лет назад

I love this guy. Love to Iran from England

@saraj6079 4 года назад

I'm saudi arabian and the soccer commentary part was so accurate it's insane 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

@lem0nwings 6 лет назад

They actually ask you the genocide question when applying UK family visas.

@SdoubleA 6 лет назад

Seriously though, why would anyone answer that question with a "yes"?

@flankspeed 6 лет назад

"Well, at least you're honest." **APPROVED**

@lem0nwings 6 лет назад

AnilAslan In addition to genocide, they also ask you if you’ve ever committed any act of terrorism.

@joermundgand 5 лет назад

Do they really expect a genocidal dictator to speak the truth?

@Rajj854 5 лет назад

has anyone ever said yes?

@innerlight4601 6 лет назад

Wow I am Iranian and i am discovering these gems just now...funny guy.احسنت

@azizbelkharmoudi2564 6 лет назад

Omid Djalili 🤣🤣 IS THE BEST

@nikolasmacedonites917 6 лет назад

have you seen the gladiator?

@innerlight4601 6 лет назад

@@nikolasmacedonites917 ohh yesss

@nikim6986 6 лет назад

You should watch his older videos on RU-vid. They're hilarious.

@maxk888 5 лет назад

احسنت isnt that arabic?

@LWWM 5 лет назад

"did you even look?" Is something I ask my husband a lot. Lol

@BeeSugar1 3 года назад

Right!? BTW, Jambo rafiki 😁

@tanyakasim3988 3 года назад

Sounds like something my mom said to my dad 20+ years ago, when he was looking for his pickup truck keys. 😂🚚🔑

@ludmillagutomo 4 года назад

"no but the night is young"

@popazz1 6 лет назад

He doesn't appear on UK television so much now, I'd forgotten how funny he can be.

@barbarahallinan1151 6 лет назад

john pee dix on..........hes funny looking.........

@popazz1 6 лет назад

Barbara Hallinan ...... And I suppose you think you're funny by spelling my name the way you did? Well here's the thing .... you're not, funny. In fact you come across as rather immature.

@barbarahallinan1151 6 лет назад

jonn p dix on............omg..another brexit whinger.

@popazz1 6 лет назад

Oh DO fuck off, woman. I never mentioned Brexit, you did. Maybe your meds have worn off and you need a top-up, you dozy mare.

@TheEmadia 6 лет назад

+JohnPaul Dixon steady on. She made some silly joke and there you go...

@ServingKant42069 5 лет назад

this guy almost made me spit out my water at work

@curiosityunlimited3780 5 лет назад

Mahesa Anabrang Do perks at your work involve watching youtube?

@samadhoosen6014 4 года назад

You guys are great because you don't see me as ethnic.... proceeds to do nothing but ethnic jokes.

@kamalebrahimi8623 5 лет назад

Although I'm an Iranian but this is the first time I'm seeing his videos, thank RU-vid for you recommendation 😅

@tommasofaoro3278 6 лет назад

DJ Khaled really let himself go

@sunkid02 6 лет назад

You can tell that same joke looking at real khaled

@GodsFaveSim 6 лет назад

ANOTHA ONE!!!

@bencarljamin3571 6 лет назад

Omid Djalili really let himself go.

@joemunoz1476 6 лет назад

We da best music!

@wodansam75 5 лет назад

@@sunkid02 underrated comment 😂👍

@DanielSadjadian 6 лет назад

He's so good! I wish the BBC could renew his TV show again.

@AdultThirdCultureKid1971 6 лет назад

Daniel Sadjadian I agree! He makes my day brighter.

@Azrael442 5 лет назад

He's wasted on the BBC

@deepu1150 6 лет назад

James blunt! Killed me!

@deepu1150 6 лет назад

@United Muslims it was sarcasm at its finest! He was listing all Muslim names and followed it with James blunt... We clearly know it's improbable and he's just messing with us!

@jamesstevo7289 Год назад

This guy is absolutely sensational. Totally underrated. Just amazin.

@karimmansour7813 5 лет назад

I am Egyptian and this guy knows exactly what he talking about :D

@1NV4DR 4 года назад

An underrated comedian. Love his content

@erfanazkat2133 5 лет назад

If messi WAS GAY i looked another way Me:dead

@dinsel9691 4 года назад

If Messi was gay, I look the other way... Meaning he would not dare look at him for fear of falling in love with him and turning gay himself...

@jovanrocksable 3 года назад

One of the under rated comedians of our generations

@JerzyFeliksKlein 5 лет назад

He is just solid. Never seen a poor performance from him

@suzannerachel6152 Год назад

Never get high on your own supply 😂. Guys brilliant and such a support to great cause ❤

@turquoisesnowflake4613 4 года назад

"What do they know, theyre not men" Dead

@t600gsxr 6 лет назад

I meet him once a lovely guy

@Yosukei22 3 года назад

Hey...when I heard mo Amer made that soccer joke, I thought I heard it before. It's from this guy...haha

@Rhys-jd1kt 3 года назад

NOW I recognise him. He's that guy from the mummy😂😂😂

@stevecarr7338 Год назад

and notting hill and pirates of the caribean. He out performed Johnny Depp off the charts

@dorisleyba5916 5 лет назад

WHOOPI introduced him to us here in the states and I cant get enough of him, so funny

@Iseyas1234 5 лет назад

Mo amer🤔🤔🤔......?

@nicehuman 5 лет назад

LOL! I like to dedicate that goal to my wife "Mohammad Ahmad." That cracked me up big time.

@ThunderBroomPilot 6 лет назад

I think that there was a female Pope, maybe like around 1100. She was found out when she gave birth.

@peadar-o 5 лет назад

She probably found the Holy Grail, and the church establishment wanted it to stay lost, to keep the mystery alive, so they got rid of her.

@agaperion 4 года назад

Still have never been able to figure out what this dude's real accent is.

@mehrshadvr4 4 года назад

British.

@hemispace641 3 года назад

The comedian Omid Djalili is always funny.

@sihamharchli 5 лет назад

Ahhaha great sense of humour I'll have to watch more of his

@sparkling.redrose 3 года назад

I'm Egyptian and that is so true

@bena5150 6 лет назад

looks like one of the guy from that Brendan Fraser's Mummy movie

@khalidmerghani1277 6 лет назад

Dr. Acula yeah, that's him.

@DanielSadjadian 6 лет назад

Oh yeah the guy who tried to steal those bug things, only to get his brain eaten out by one.

@telectronix1368 6 лет назад

Daniel Sadjadian - At least he stopped selling queer giraffes.

@1funkyflyguy 6 лет назад

That's because he is THE guy from that Brendan Fraser's Mummy movie.

@wizzaking 6 лет назад

When he does the bit impersonating the statue "lelelelele!!" so funny

@terencejay8845 5 лет назад

When I applied for my USA visa in 1972, one question was 'Are you now, or have you ever been, a member of the Communist Party?' At 17, I put 'No'. However, the visa was issued for 'Indefinitely for Multiple Applications' so by now I could be Putin's deputy, and still get in.

@jody024 4 года назад

He had the Assassins creed logo beard.

@FBab-jb4lp 5 лет назад

i miss Oimd please return to dubai , we love you ❤❤❤❤

@chescalynn4411 6 лет назад

😂 That was hysterical

@drsaliyusufmindar9092 3 года назад

That soccer and Muhammad - Ahmad part was just so relatable lol 😂😂

@ethanflorianswarthout8325 5 лет назад

He's not shitting 😂😂😂😂😂, I had to go through this shit 😂😂😂😂. The questions are literally that blunt, and stupid 😂😂😂😂

@johnnyviking7859 4 года назад

Yusuf amiiiiir , WE gettin' araab moneyyy

@MohammadUmairAnsari 4 года назад

His Egyptian commentary is spot on.

@Jew_Gi_Oh Год назад

Yusuf Amir: WE GOT ARAB MONEY!!!

@EternalVirgin 3 года назад

I thought Djalili was an adaptation of the Arabic word "Jalil" which means "great"

@Baba-so6fh 3 года назад

He’s obviously said it means less just for the punch line

@MrCaptainXXJack 5 лет назад

Tough Crowd man!

@harryabb7992 5 лет назад

He lost them soon as he said i'm iranian

@philipkay8372 5 лет назад

real solid, crowd was a lil unresponsive

@newgabe09 5 лет назад

wonder why you say that? They're laughing and enjoying it, paying attention and getting the lines...

@skeeterfinklage445 4 года назад

The crowd laughed equal to how funny it was, I mean I'm glad you loved it, but it was chuckle shit, nothing more.

@TayMcKenzieNZ 5 месяцев назад

Loved this guy in gta 4, gta online, and now finding out he's a comedian. I have a lot of catching up to do. He's hilarious xD

@besiatumtum3944 6 лет назад

This is awesome!

@pentuprager6225 5 лет назад

He means real Pope ie Head of the Egyptian Coptic Christian Church; or the fake "Pope" head of the Roman Catholic Church as Pope is not and has never been the official title. The head of the Roman Catholic Church is King of Vatican City.

@billybabu 6 лет назад

Blunt Ending

@francinegray9383 4 года назад

This was fabulous, watching in 2019. Persian comedians are amazing.

@tareqsalam8990 6 лет назад

His Arabic very good 👍

@thepilgrim1581 3 года назад

When the video stops and your still laughing 🤣 Lol..... Ha ha..

@hamiltonbrown1989 5 лет назад

I am dying on the football commentary!!!! Excitable is right! lol

@earthlove628 6 лет назад

Djalili DOES NOT mean less!!!! Djalili MEANS RESPECTING HIGH ✔️👌🏼

@curiosityunlimited3780 5 лет назад

P Javah Flow with the wind

@Sonic57053 Год назад

Fun Fact: He is the Voice Actor of Yusuf Amir from GTA EFLC/TBOGT

@brandonallen3289 4 года назад

When he was talking about the questions for the passport application. I believe him.

@zakariaali8864 5 лет назад

Watch arabic commentary in el classico. The excitement and screaming will not only destroy the roof but will tear a hole in the sky.

@MyPronounsISwhom 5 лет назад

"There it is! ... it's been there the whole time!"

@nreaction 6 лет назад

my goodness 1am and i laugh very hard while my family are sleeping. keep it up omid.

@morugascorpion6021 5 лет назад

I’m glad omid is back. I missed him.

@ahmarsaeed6085 4 года назад

The way he read the genocide question had me bloody rolling!

@lessanearabicenter9568 4 года назад

Thé guy who speak about football isnt Egyptian is an Algerian and another from Tunisia for bein sport .

@Sarah-sv3yu 5 лет назад

as an egyptian this is hilarious and true

@thephoenix756 3 года назад

As a Sudanese I found it weird that Messi's hypothetical boyfriend had to be Sudanese. 🤔

@absolutebollocks2258 5 лет назад

I love how he has a new border agent joke every couple of years..

@flipjin 4 года назад

I will never buy giraffes from him again!!!

@arsenalforever5976 2 года назад

he is not funny hideous with his joke what a joke

@bayupran 5 лет назад

Never heard of this guy, but boy now I'm in love

@sibusisomagagula324 3 года назад

That Messi Bit is legendary 🤣

@Fettman89 Год назад

Holy shit, I grew up with this guy in The Mummy, how am I only finding out now he's a comedian?

@LadyDecember 4 месяца назад

I was the other way around 😆I used to watch him on Just For Laughs reruns and when I saw The Mummy in full a couple years later, I was all "how am I only finding out now he was in The Mummy?!"

@Fettman89 4 месяца назад

@@LadyDecember Haha total opposite, that's wild