Overcoming the FEAR of cancer returning and becoming YOU again! 

They spotted the nodule in 2022 when it was stage 1. Then the surgeon who did the bronch couldn't manage to find anything. He reassured me up and down, "no cancer". So we sat on it for a year. Then my pulmonologist didn't like what he saw in the new scan, so he ordered another PET and did the second bronch himself - and he found it - stage 2b. I had a lobectomy and the surgeon was real optimistic that she got it all. All the lymph node samples came back negative. 12 weeks of chemo, lost my job when I was ready to come back, The January PET scan (2023) was the first one that showed ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. They could find nothing even of note. I had every range of emotion seeing that. I thought I'd dodged the bullet. 12 weeks of immuno and it messed me up bad and I couldn't continue with it. Then the June PET scan showed that it just picked up where it left off - in a lymph node - stage 3 (which it probably was at the time of surgery). And it also showed my pancreas lighting up and my eye doctor had just told me that he thinks my vision loss is in my brain, which was ominous. FML. Brain scan said nothing, pancreas followups say it's probably autoimmune reaction from the immunotherapy - "minor miracles" *eye-roll*. But the lymph node makes perfect sense and was confirmed by a second bronch, to be the same lung cancer from the now absent lobe. I just completed 6 weeks of chemo-radiation (with an extra chemo) and was able to work the entire time this time. Emotional as my final day of radiation might have been, I told them "it's never goodbye, it's see you later" - because this shit always pops up somewhere else like whack-a-mole. I've got no optimism left in me.

This was amazing! Thank you. It took me 4 years of worrying, before the 'pts' subsided. I used to think about cancer every day. I wouldn't plan for the future. Now 6 years later I am living my life and I almost never think about cancer. I am a totally different person. I wish I was the old me, but I have new amazing things in my life. I am just fine with the new me. She is a wiser, more resilient, less anxious and braver version of me. The looks do go back to normal (I recommend retin a cream and cerave moisturizer for the face). Dee, this is the best thing I have seen as post cancer advice anywhere!

I love watching your videos. I’m more than a year out and I’m still crazy anxious it will come back. Example- I literally am sitting here writing this with onions in my socks because I read today that it will draw out toxins. 😅Cancer is crap. It literally changed everything. But this video kinda turned a light on for me. I was stage 3 breast cancer and you said it perfectly. Live like it will come back. Maybe it won’t. I sure as heck hope it doesn’t but I gotta change my thinking to living like this. Love your compassion for others! Keep strong my friend!!!!

I came across your video at the right time. Thank you so much for sharing. I’m a stage 3 breast cancer survivor, diagnosed at 36. Due my 3 year scan soon, all the usual thoughts and feelings coming up. Sending lots of love x

Thaaaank you so much!Everything you said I have felt 100 % and I just couldn’t talk about because no one understood me. WOW thank you 2020 I was diagnosed with lymphoma and first round of chemo left me in the ICU with a 40% chance to live. I am still here standing strong.

You are such a positive and supportive girl! You always give the best advice and make so much sense. I think you should be a therapist yourself. Wait! I think you are one already!! Thank you again for sharing your wealth of knowledge and experience with us. You always keep it real❤

Thank you from the bottom of my heart your view rings true with my experience in breast cancer a lot of the same things and feelings happen to all of us and by sharing it helps so Thank you

I'm really grateful for you Dee. Not only do you normalise my feelings but you manage to make me laugh along the way 😊 I live with low grade lymphoma which is different to other cancers in that almost certainly will come back and will need treatment again. Dealing with the fear of that is a daily war I fight with myself.

Thank you for this film. Thank you talking about how most of us who are on this cancer journey are feeling. Very very helpful , I love your positivity in this very realistic video and subject.🥰

My experience with cancer has been quite different. I was born disabled and sick. Being mostly bedridden my whole life, I have never been able to work. I have also been through lots of surgeries and medical treatments since birth. I was never expected to live this long. I am at the hospitals 1-3 times a week. So when I got diagnosed with cancer last year, nothing really changed. All cancer has done to me is kick me while I am already down. I reached NED 2 weeks ago and I have a high reoccurrence rate, so at this moment in time, I am worried it will come back. It's hard explaining this to my friends and family, because I am not in remission, they just cannot see it in my scans. My cancer markers are still elevated as well, but that could go away on its own. It is a weird feeling. Thank you for this video. ❤

Thank you so much ❤ you are so right about this journey! You are so right about life after cancer. Thank you for putting this out. ❤

Thank you Dee such a brilliant video. I had BC 8 years ago and a recurrence 3 years ago. I’m in remission and do pretty well but I think of cancer everyday, Ive put weight on and don’t feel myself. Just a big reminder to enjoy life while you can and I hope you continue to do so ❤

This is so spot on! I had triple negative…there are not all of the options available to us….our fear is a bit more intense. I love your videos and how honest you are!

Bless you for your words, Dee ❤ You have given us courage, resolve and enthusiasm to live our lives to the fullest. I myself needed a pep talk this week, and I listened to you on my drive to the pool. Swimming has always been a great rehab for me, but my swim tonight was especially exhilarating after hearing you speak ! Thank you ☘️💕

Yes, yes, YES! You said it all so beautifully. Thank you! 🩷🩷🩷

Omg love you! You are so amazing. Your videos are so wonderful and relatable… I was diagnosed stage four November 2020 I am now turning 55. I’ve had a really healthy wonderful life. I will always appreciate my condition… In times when it’s hard to stay positive I do try to reflect and what a wonderful life I’ve already had. It’s not an easy life, but it’s still wonderful! Even though it changes you forever sometimes you have to focus on all the positive changes that have come into your life from this condition… I turned deep into my faith, but I know that’s not for everyone and it’s OK but that’s what has helped me so much to understand why we go through such hard times here on this earth… Best wishes to you keep on doing what you’re doing. You are so amazing. Your kids are so lucky to have you as a mom!❤️❤️❤️❤️

I just had my 1 year post chemo at the end of September. I have a lot of fear of coming off the supplemental treatment (PARP inhibitor for BRCA) in December - have AI’s to still be on for a while. I just recently started feeling more like myself, but am far from being where I want to be (realistically post cancer). I need to take the next step for therapy. Thanks so much for being here!

Really good advice good talk u said it like it is I am a cancer survivor thank to God the all mighty thanks for all the good advice 🙏🏻🤗

Oh, Dee, that was so well said as always! I love you, girl, i've said it so many times before. Your positivity and harsh realism have been my companion since my diagnosis 3 years ago. I am already doing the things that you mentioned and you are right - we need to accept it, learn to live with the uncertainty and don't put off the things that we really want to do/buy/experience. That bloody cancer was a proper kick in the butt for me to make time and space for all the things that i never had the courage or time to do! Keep thriving and enjoying life, Dee ❤️

Sooooo helpful Dee! You are a total inspiration. Clear, concise and practical advice. Thank you. Bless ya. 👍🙏😃❤️☘️

Thank you so much Dee. You are so real. I am a little over a year out from stage 1 grade1 invasive lobular (4mm) node negative, and DCIS low grade. Dbl mx for surgery. I tried the AI hormone blockers, awful quality of life. Only gave me a 2% advantage anyway. Risk vs benefits = not worth it. I do worry about a recurrence a lot. I have lived a wonderful life. God willing, I will have many more years enjoying my kids and 5 grandkids. Living life to the fullest, while I can. I really appreciate your videos. You are so right, I told my husband recently, I wish I could be me again. I know I will never be. Counting blessings everyday helps. Dumping negative relationships has been freeing.

You are doing absolutely fabulous! I’ve been logging my journey too and you are handling things like a champ! I’m currently taking a break from targeted therapy and I have metastatic breast cancer. I was so afraid to make this decision because of the fear of it spreading, but I had to get over that fear and push through it. My quality of life is really important to me. So anyway I’m rambling now, but I really appreciate your videos. They make me feel like I’m not alone in all this 🫶🏼

Exactly! Live your life❤❤

30:20…. Exactly, it could and I live each day today like it isn’t the end of the world if it returns again, I will keep on keeping on…… until I don’t! Love you girl. Truly, mean it.

Never going back to the old you, but accepting the new you was a big step for me. ive learned not to sweat the small stuff which helps face fear down. Im 2 years out of treatment for triple negative bc and am now being checked out for gastric cancer. Focusing on the now helps tremendously. Thanks for the video, you did well ❤️

This is the best video I’ve ever seen. You summarised my thoughts and feelings during cancer journey. I highly appreciated

I'm metastatic. The fear comes and goes. Mostly I try to live normally but occasionally I start thinking about things like statistics and get depressed even though my health is currently good. You are right that acceptance is the first step., but it's still hard.

Thanks Dee. You’re spot on. I’ve been in fear of moving to Stage 4 since diagnosis 6 months ago. I put everything on hold and stay home and avoid travel because I have no neutrophils. It’s quite isolating at the moment. Your Patient story was excellent by the way.

I loved this ❤ I'm starting radiation next week after surgery which I had a month ago that diagnosed me with DCIS, After the small invasion had been totally removed during the biopsy. I was feeling quite low about myself and my life in general before I got diagnosed, a little lost. Then this happened, I was told I have IDC ,and later that day told myself: "OK! I GOTTA CHANGE MY WAY OF THINKING". Strangely I feel happier than before I was diagnosed because it was a wake up call to ease my anxiety over the small stuff I obsessed over. I've been anxious for most of my life which probably stems from childhood. I am taking therapy in fact and that past trauma comes to surface alot in my sessions, and is probably the reason why I already worry about a recurrence. Hopefully if I can overcome the PTS from my past it will be easier to overcome any other worry or fear I have about pretty much anything in life (which btw i actually described how i feel to my psychologist as you did: "the PTSD the soldiers have when they come back from war"). So yes, together with treating yourself to some pampering, practicing mindfulness and meditation, a fancy dinner out or the occasional burger from Shake Shack, THERAPY IS THE WORD 😊 much love to you from Dubai 😘

You are so kind and sweet. You encouraged me through this process. I am totally agreed with you about changing the way you think and accept it. Trust in God every day of your life. Improve your metabolic health by lower the sugar intake to stop the tumor growth. (Per Dr Thomas Seyfried) Thank you for your encouragement and sharing your journey ❤

Amazing video Dee , your videos are always helpful , thank you so much ❤

Great insightful video Dee. Thank you❤❤❤

👊Keep goin'. You did great! 💚💙

Omg you are so right in everything you said … thank you so much xxx Love from Brunei xx

12 years since diagnosis and still find October particularly triggering - the ridiculous, pink ribbon branding everywhere like BC is some sexy, fun, girly disease 🤮. Spot on video- sums the entire experience up exactly Dee, well done - you are really helping a lot of people.

I don't have cancer. But this video got me thinking. Cause I have noticed I stopped going out of the house only when I had to Gave up my mobile dog grooming business. I had groceries deliver and did doctors online and not answering calls from my love ones. I starting to have panic attacks. Cause of my stage 5 kidney disease and having to start home dialysis 8 hours a night. What a burden I am on my family. I just want go back to who I was before this. I love to travel and volunteer with my dog rescues taking dogs all over.I had plans for me and my hubby 25 yrs married retirement yrs doing going where we always talked about. Now what do I got to look forward to. Nothing but hooked up machine the neuropathy is in my feet hands and eyes I now have to get eye injection in both cause of it. Just miserable. Family don't get it looking at me I'm OK but not I can't explain to them how it feels tired all the time. Scared of all the procedures that have to threw. But I gotta get out this funk. Wish I new how.

Thank you! I needed to hear this today. Love and prayers❤❤❤

Love. You so much I enjoy watching your videos❤

Amen girlfriend!!! ❤️

I had full body bone scan cause of pain in my right ribs a couple of weeks ago . I kept thinking of what you wrote to me in a comment and it helped me so much 😊

In the US kisqali and Verzenio are considered oral chemotherapy. I’m taking Verzenio with hormone blockers to reduce risk of recurrence. Not easy but grateful this medication exists!

Absolutely was so so helpful ❤ thank you

Nicely done....👍

Each us is unique i know women who aftwr stage1 cancer back stage 4 and I see women with stage 3 never back i believe if we said it comes back prabobly it will if you say not come back it's possible live long life it's all meant too plus cancer change me 16 hours fasting,eating super clean,walking 7 km daily and exercise with weights keep us strong no more wine .So it's all how we thinking if we negative that's happening.

You look beautiful ❤️

Your great. I feel like you are talking to me

This was such a sweet video 🥹 We are grateful for you ❤